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Christian College Sex Comedy: Part 26 A New Student (tribal) Council   In 30 parts, By FinalStand. Listen to the podcast at Explicit Novels.             If you can't look in a mirror and laugh at yourself, cut off the light             "Can we put other restrictions on you?" Simone Brady prodded.   "This is not the 'Zane' show," Virginia Goodswell interjected. "We need to decide when the new Student government will meet, I suggest Tuesday nights, and how we are going to conduct business."   "We can start by deciding where we meet," Chastity spoke up. "I vote for Zane's place."   "What's wrong with the Assembly Hall, where we've always met?" Rhaine countered.   "Rhaine, you are drinking a Doctor Pepper, KayLeigh, you are drinking a grape juice, and Joy was eating a bowl of vanilla ice cream with chocolate syrup when I got here," Hope snickered. "You have hot plates and microwaves too, if needed."   Rhaine, Joy, and KayLeigh, all Traditionalists, looked guilty. They also looked like they treasured their creature comforts because they weren't running for the door.   "It is a nice place," KayLeigh admitted.   "And you don't get to come back up here otherwise," Rio grinned evilly. "This floor is devoted to the freshman class."   "There are a lot of upperclassmen up here right now," Rhaine pointed out.   "Those are what you would call 'friends'," Rio sneered. "If you weren't freaking evil, you might have some."   "Please don't put it that way," I requested of Rio. Rio had every reason to be cranky. Mercy looked even more exhausted sitting at her side.   "Zane will arrange the room to fit your needs," Christina finally spoke, "I guarantee it."   "You think you can control him?" Rhaine shot back.   "I'm not afraid of him; he's not some wild beast. I ask him to do things for me and he does," Christina chided Rhaine. "He is like any other freshman; it is that simple."   "He's rather mouthy for a freshman," Hannah joked.   "Well, maybe if you put my mouth to other uses," I bantered back. There was a moment of silence followed by Dana Gorman taking up her bottled water and walking over to me. She smiled down at my seated form while she poured out the remaining water onto my crown.   "Cool off, Casanova," Dana cautioned me playfully before returning to her seat.   "Exactly why do you keep her around again?" Rio slapped my shoulder.   "Can you imagine how insufferable Christina would be if Coach didn't keep her in line?" I smiled. Christina rolled her eyes while Rio chuckled. Virginia stood up and cleared her throat.   "I want to make sure that all the ladies, plus Zane, plan to make this experiment work. It is rather pointless to proceed if any of you can't be honest now," Virginia, my Spiritual Advisor, poled the audience. Most of the girls looked around to see who would do what but no one jumped.   "I think it is safe to say that we students will stay true to the Vice Chancellor's plan, though this is not an endorsement of Zane, his conduct, or even his continued presence here," Rhaine spoke for the group.   "With that settled, we can call it a night," Doctor Kennedy declared. "Ladies, consider what issues we need to deal with so we can bring them up next Tuesday night, 9 pm."   "Who do we send the itinerary to?" Simone inquired.   "Zane," Hudson Lane volunteered me.   "I nominate Faith De Young (of Christina's inner circle) to be our Secretary of Record, if she wants the job," I said. Faith looked completely taken off-guard but nodded quickly.   "I'll do it," she made clear. The meeting broke up soon after with most of the student leadership departing. Dana, Hudson, and Christina & company hung around a little longer.   "Not the Glamorous Gremlin?" Rio teased me on my choice of Secretary. She gasped and nearly fell over right after that. Iona smiled softly and shook her head. She realized that she was still a freshman and her day would come.   "Ah, here's one of the controllers," Heaven gave a devilish smile as she handed the device over to Rio. Miraculously, the other three sexual wonders were also handed over, ending the threat of torture for the day.   "I see a spanking machine in you bitches' future," Rio snarled at Chastity, Hope, Heaven, Faith, and Christina.   "I swear, I tried to get one of those damn things all day long," Valarie griped. "You would think that after setting this up, someone would have given me one, but no, I am a freshman so I don't get to play the game."   "It was you!" Rio screamed, and lunged at Valarie, who comically batted her away as Vivian and Mercy intervened.   "Yes," Val laughed, "but it was Iona who figured out how to have captured your days by enlisting the aid of classmates with video phones. I can tell today's footage is going to be a classic."   "Why did you do it?" Vivian asked Valarie.   "I had revenge on Rio and made Mercy ecstatically happy; it was a win-win," Val grinned vindictively. It was a credit to Rio's berserk nature that no one asked what Rio had done to warrant revenge; everyone automatically assumed that Valarie was justified.   "Everyone's sympathy is under-whelming," Rio grumbled. "Come on, Mercy, let's get these things off."   "Do we have to?" Mercy pleaded softly. Hell, I imagine she could barely stand but apparently, her limit to sexual overstimulation was unconsciousness. Rio used one finger to hook Mercy's collar and pulled her close.   "How dare you talk back," Rio whispered, but I was close enough to hear. "I was going to settle for the vibrating nipple clamps that arrived today but now I'm thinking a few dozen paddle blows, to each cheek, are in your future, you annoying little bitch."   Annoying was Mercy and Rio's code word for 'love'; Rio simply couldn't stand the 'L' word.   "Vibrating nipple clamps?" Christina was both confused and amused. "Where do you people come up with this stuff?"   "Adam and Eve," Rio shot back without batting an eye. "Wait until I have Mercy's nipples and lips pierced; then the real fun begins."   "I don't think Mercy should have her lips pierced," Vivian suggested forcefully. "They'd be glaringly obvious." Rio groaned and sighed.   "Not those lips," Rio clarified. "The other ones, you know, labia, cunt lips, cunt etc." There was a pregnant pause in the room. "Attach vibrator wires to those bad boys and Wow! Let the magic begin."   Mercy and Rio really were made for each other; they were both salivating at the prospect. Thankfully, I saw Cassandra hovering around and looking ready for me to start playing towel boy.   "Ladies, one last duty to perform and then my day is done," I attempted my exit.   "Zane, is it alright if I spend the night?" Hope ambushed me.   "Of course," I smiled, because I'm a fucking idiot who is an embarrassment to the very concept of the mentally challenged and a parody of every teen boy date flick. I was already spending time with Iona, Paige, Barbie Lynn, and now Hope.   Maybe I can find a way to have a secret government space array shoot an earthquake laser at my feet so a pit opens up underneath me and I plummet to a fiery death at the Earth's core. Maybe I watch too much bad TV.   "Iona, did my Viagra arrive yet," I teased my buddy. "I'm going to need a pill tonight."   "Oh, Zane, I don't think we have any but I'll go online and see what I can get for you," Iona replied in all seriousness.   "I know some guys who smuggle them in from Mexico," Valarie offered. "I'll make some calls."   "That is so cool!" Barbie Lynn clapped her hands. "Now he'll never go down. I can ride him all night long." She hugged me while a fearful vision of my desiccated, sperm-drained husk lying open-eyed and lifeless on my bed danced before my eyes.   "Zane?" Cassandra called out.   "Oh, yes, towel boy and bikini selection," I muttered. I gravitated her way, took her hand, and led her to my room.   "What's that about?" Vivian mused.   "Handmaiden's Duty," Iona informed the ladies. "He picks out a bikini for her and acts as pool boy while she's in the Jacuzzi."   "I hope someone cleans that thing from time to time," Faith shuddered.   "Every morning at ten o'clock it is drained and cleaned, and the filter cleaned every Monday," Iona droned on without even looking up. The rest of that exchange was lost as I retreated to my bedroom.   What followed could be blamed on Cassandra accidently dropping her drink in the Jacuzzi and me having to retrieve it; it was an unopened soda can. Or maybe it could be blamed on the surprisingly conservative (for my room) white and black striped bikini she wore. Whatever was the catalyst, inside five minutes I had Cassandra out of her suit, front to front, her crotch pressing me against the side of the Jacuzzi with my head barely above water while she rode my face in a pattern and energy that reminded me of Hawaii's North Shore.   Cassandra was pounding the back of my head against the wood wall as she drove her cunt over my lips and tongue again and again.   "Oh, Baby, you are so much better than my fingers," she communicated with an erotic growl. "Keep it up, keep it up!" She was the one in the control of the sexual rhythm so I was not sure what else I might do but keep licking and sucking as hard as I could.   I was finally able to run a hand along her chocolate flesh until I managed to push against her sternum and got her to roll her shoulders back. That allowed me to start massaging and stroking one of her breasts while my other hand got between her legs from behind and gently penetrated her cunt.   "Za, za, za, Zane!" she screamed out. Note to self: Add earplugs to my Must Have List.   Cassandra slathered my nose, lips, and chin with her rather scalding, light to the tongue and tasty fluids. If she wasn't still trying to give me a concussion with her hips I might have enjoyed it more. As her orgasm dissipated, she slid down my body with a sated sigh. Her legs were outside mine so as she descended, her cunt came to rest on my Speedo-encased cock. Saying that my cock was hard would be like saying snow is cold or the English love their soccer; pretty much a given.   Her eyes grew wide when she realized where she rested. She's a senior and a virgin in a Christian Girl's school, she began humping me, of course. Being Cassandra, she began humping me hard and thumping her way to another climax.   "Zane, I am totally rethinking you being allowed on campus," Cassandra panted.   "Is this a good thing or a bad thing?" I wondered. At this time I had one finger lightly in her cunt as my other hand tenderly tweaked one of her nipples.   "Oh, I think every junior and senior should have their own personal freshman boy to keep under control with a strong hand," she grinned while she kept working my rod over with her cunt.   "Wouldn't it be nice if we developed a peaceful, platonic relationship based on mutual trust and respect?" I suggested hopefully. Cassandra gave a deep, throaty laugh.   "You're funny, but no," she grinned evilly. "After all, if that was the case, I couldn't do this: Zane, suck my other nipple, suck it hard, while I play with your fat phallus." Oh yeah, I love the way this is going (insert internalized weeping).   She worked out my cock painfully fast and began rubbing it deeply between her labia, to the point I felt the tightness of her vaginal walls on my cockhead.   "Zane, you know a whole lot about the sex stuff," she stated. "What's a cock ring?" Oh, HELL No! I have enough difficulty ejaculating as is. The last thing I need is something that allows another to make the prospects of my ejaculation even dimmer.   "It's a device, a ring, that is placed over the base of the cock to restrict blood flow, thus allowing longer erections," I grudgingly confessed. "Thinking about getting one, as a Christmas present, for someone out of state?"   "So, you could have intercourse, for a long time, and not ejaculate, so a girl would be, safe, in fucking you raw?" Cassandra's voice was becoming more strained.   "Technically, yes, but a little music, some hand-holding, and dinner at McDonald's would suffice in getting me aroused," I tried to explain. "There is no need for, something like that."   "Zane, clearly God put you, on this campus as a test for, true believers," Cassandra related, "And every woman here needs, to be tested, A Lot!" she screamed out her second orgasm of the night.   My hands raced down to grab each luscious buttock before her spasms caused her to slip down my cock and make her virginity a thing of the past. When my cock slapped against my stomach, I held Cassandra tight until she calmed down.   "You need to stay on campus during the weekends," Cassandra moaned with content exhaustion, "so we can use you more often."   "Why do you think I flee campus every weekend?" I thought. If she had her way, I'd be walking around with an IV in my arm and popping Viagra like M&M's. I chose life! If you think I am a coward, step up and take my place. I'll sneak back into the cemetery at night and put a flower on your headstone. You can take that permanent smile etched on your face to your grave, He-Man.   "I have to ask: What brought this on?" I inquired.   "I received one of Mercy's controls and we shared the next class," Cassandra confessed. "She glowed with such pleasure I thought she would pass out. I was suddenly curious."   "I had nothing to do with that," I groaned. "I swear, it wasn't me." Cassandra placed one hand on each side of my face.   "Zane, it wasn't you, I know that," she smiled, "but it is your presence that allowed something like that, her ability to experience that level of pleasure, that I want to experience. I have to go now. I need to report to the other girls what it was like so we can figure out what to do with you next."   You know, if I had been paranoid, I would have been right, people are plotting against me. Cassandra stood up and stepped onto the bench so that I was once more facing her puffy, somewhat abused cunt lips before she swung one leg over me and exited the tub. I closed my eyes and let my head hang over the side, facing up.   "Towel boy," Cassandra taunted me. I looked at her. Cassandra was dripping wet and she was extending a towel my way. I pulled my own tired ass out of the Jacuzzi and tenderly buffed her excellent body until she was dry. She gave me one last kiss, dressed, and virtually skipped out of my domain, happy, arrogant and plotting my demise.   I cleaned up, dealt with the Jacuzzi, and took in my surroundings. The only witnesses to my congress and conversation with Cassandra were Dana Gorman and Hudson Lane, my voyeuristic adult female 'friends'.   Dana pulled me over as I walked passed her. Hudson Lane had gone off to get some drinks.   "You and Gabrielle, ?"   "You have no respect for my survival instincts, do you?" I chuckled.   "Not really," Dana smirked.   "Fine," I groaned in feigned annoyance. "She wanted to talk so we talked, nothing else happened."   "She beat you up, didn't she?" Gorman persisted.   Another deep sigh on my part came out before I confessed, "Yes. Why do you ask?"   "I wanted to smack you around from the first day I met you," Dana laughed. "I think Ms. Black has done admirably not beating you black and blue before now."   "Has yet another girl beaten Zane up?" Hudson angled around to sit next to Dana. "The consistency of the femdom attitudes at this school is frightening."   "Don't throw stones, Ms. Lane," Dana warned her. "You, Zane, and Ms. Messier, the lawyer Ms. Buchanan hired to help Zane when he went to jail, I was head of security when it happened and I know when Ms. Messier arrived on campus, where she stayed, and when she, and you, left this dorm."   "You never said anything to Chancellor Bazz?" Hudson worried.   "No," Dana responded. "You three are adults, and ruining your career here wouldn't have made expelling Zane any easier. I wasn't the sex police."   "Thank you," Hudson smiled. "I now have another reason to be happy Zane championed your cause with the Board of Directors." She touched Dana on her thigh.   "It's not going to happen, Lane," Dana informed the lawyer while opening her V-8. "I've had a long time to figure out that I'm not attracted to women." Wow, Dana knew that Hudson was bi-sexual and didn't care. That was another big plus for Dana in my book.   "That's what Brigitte Messier thought as well," Hudson winked. "It turns out a little bit of Zane goes a long way to loosening up a girl's morals and expanding their horizons."   "I repeat, it is not going to happen," Dana shook her head. "Zane's a student and I'm a teacher. Perhaps the day he graduates, I'll kidnap him for a long, frustration-relieving weekend. I haven't had sex in eight years and watching him work really stresses my resolve."   "You could always join me in the hot tub," I offered. I wasn't sure how serious I was. I also wasn't sure how bad a concussion Cassandra had given me.   "Zane, do you have any idea of what I would do to you if I focused all my pent up sexual fury onto that body of yours?" Dana threatened. I gulped.   "Does it start with me tying you down?" I suggested sweetly. Hudson was looking really intrigued by this. I was beginning to believe she had this erotic attraction to 'turning' straight girls, most likely mirroring her own Law School experiences.   "What do you think?" she glared. Dana was becoming seriously aroused.   "I guess my only other question is if I can outrun you," I joked. Dana kept staring.   "Zane," Hudson snickered, "do you realize that your swimsuit is basically transparent when wet?"   "No, I didn't," I gulped once more. My package was less than a foot from Dana's lips. "Sorry, I'll be going to bed now," I backed up.   "That's a really nice ass," Dana sighed as I turned away.   "It is even nicer to touch," Hudson commented.   "It's not happening, Lane," Dana grumbled.   "Oh, you will come around," Hudson Lane laughed softly. "I have faith in Zane." Dana growled in rebuttal.   When I rounded the first cut-back leading to my bedroom, I heard and smelled sex, suddenly, sneaking off to Gabrielle Black's place and hiding out for the night sounded like a good idea, barring her killing me, of course. I sorted out the noises as I moved around until the room came into full view.   Reminder number one: Check the God Damn air filters!   Where the fuck do I begin?   On the far side of the bed, Mercy was on her knees, head down on a pillow with her painfully ecstatic face looking toward me. That was how I could tell she had been gagged. Her wrists were handcuffed behind her back, she was moaning and sweating up a storm, and her whole aura emanated with tantric excitement.   In case you might be wondering where her Mistress was: Rio was straddling Mercy's back, ass resting on Mercy's neck (by the tension in her thighs, Rio wasn't pressing down hard thankfully) and facing her playmate's highly vulnerable posterior.   "Hold out a little longer, my slut," Rio egged Mercy on quietly as she paddled those beautiful exposed ass cheeks, apparently in a random fashion.   And now it gets weird(er): Behind Mercy, facing Rio, wielding a strap-on with firm, slow, and steady strokes, was Paige. For the love of the Almighty, should I be quarantined as an immorality contagion? It wasn't like Paige was an angel but she was taking a few giant steps to proficiently wielding an artificial cock into a bound girl's bunghole. The fact that Rio and Paige despised each other continued warping my perception of events.   Barbie Lynn (farthest away in the closest group), Vivian, and Valarie were on the near side of the sheets. They weren't actually having sex but were talking in low voices with the occasional running of a hand through a companion's hair or tracing a finger from hip to thigh. It was sensual without being pornographic. It also appeared to be something they all three were enjoying.   In the middle section of my sleeping platform (it is an awesomely big bed) was Iona and Hope, who were doing a little more than cuddling together in quiet conversation. Hope stroked Iona's head compassionately as Iona gently teased and suckled on Hope's left breast. Every ounce of my experience cried out to me that Iona had initiated the sexual contact. That boggled the mind, right up there with Hope allowing a near stranger such intimate contact.   "Hey, Lover," Barbie Lynn gifted me with a sultry leer, "are you going to take that off or are you going to allow him to bust out on his own?" Bathing suit, cock, raging erection; got it. I yanked off my speedo fast enough to make my skin burn. I wrapped it up in a towel before tossing them in the clothes hamper.   I quickly plotted out my journey, figuring out where I was supposed to end up. I was giving up the illusion that I controlled events because if I was created in God's image and that was the reason God wanted men to rule over women, then I think God was really Goddess and Heaven's soul had it right, change sides.   Valarie gave me a fearless grin as I climbed over her on my way to the middle. She shifted so that her breasts swayed from side to side. I took in the view before kissing her and moving on.   "Try to settle things down by eleven, Zane," Vivian requested. I nodded and then kissed the tip of her nose, which she returned by kissing my forehead. It was very motherly of her, barring the fact that the sheets barely covered her pubic region and every exposed bit of her looked scrumptious.   My last hurdle was Barbie Lynn, and that was an obstacle in more than just the physical sense. She knew how to stretch and yawn just right for making my blood boil with lust and my vision cloud with desire.   "You will come back to me, Zane," she said with brazen tenderness. "Now go on and take care of the others who need you now." Best Blonde Bombshell ever.   As I settled behind Hope who was still facing Iona, I took it slow to let her instincts understand that I wasn't a threat but desirous of her.   "What's going on here?" I inquired delicately. "Hope, I didn't think you liked Iona all that much? And Iona, you have become much more confident in the past month; I like it."   "Zane, Iona is one of the bravest freshmen I've ever met. She's never backed down from a challenge and is smart enough to fight the battles she can win and send others to win the one's she can't," Hope explained. "I have admired her for some time."   "I know you wanted Hope to be put at ease," Iona related. "She's surrounded by people she has minimal familiarity with. I reasoned that I could help her adjust by doing what you do."   "Sexy, clever, lethal girls; this is definitely going on my Santa Wish List," I grinned. I was trying to settle in behind Hope when she wiggled around onto her back and indicated she wanted me to move between her and Iona. I was hardly in the mood to refuse and soon, both ladies were nestled in my arms. I was thinking about the next step when the situation around Mercy increased in energy and volume.   Hope pushed halfway over my chest and Iona turned away from me so they could watch the proceedings. Mercy was shivering like a leaf in a thunderstorm. Rio moved up so that her face was inches away from Paige's. I could see Paige contemplating her next action before she leaned into Rio. They each placed a hand behind the other's head to keep them close as they kissed.   "You smart-ass hooker," Rio snickered. "What flavor is that?" Mercy was cresting toward her orgasm unattended while Rio made small talk with Paige.   "Mango, lip balm and mouth wash," Paige beamed triumphantly. Rio snorted.   "Really start hammering the bitch," Rio ordered/requested. Paige nodded. She slowly drew back until only the tip of the fake phallus remained in Mercy's rectum before savagely slamming it all the way in as hard as she could.   Mercy squealed through her gag and began to violently spasm. Rio dismounted Mercy and flopped beside her partner's head.   "Don't you dare lose it, Cum-Bunny," Rio pressed Mercy. "Disappoint me and you will get nothing until the weekend. I won't let you touch anyone, even yourself. Are we clear?"   Mercy sobbed and nodded while her body teetered on the precipice of total collapse. Paige was displeased with Mercy's resistance and began spanking her thighs and buttocks hard enough to leave imprints. Rio kept stroking Mercy's hair and urging her to hang on. At the pinnacle of the moment I knew Mercy could not go on, Rio spoke softly into her ear.   "You annoying whore," she said, "I am so proud to be with you. Don't ever leave, now cum." Mercy's resulting climax was so powerful that her muscle spasms knocked Paige back on her heels knocking the strap-on mostly out of her ass. Mercy squirted, really squirted, onto Paige's lap, with even more juice shooting and coating Mercy's thighs and my sheets.   Up front, Mercy was cursing up a storm through her gag, grinding the fabric between her teeth with tears streaming out of her clenched eyes. Before her thrashing subsided, Rio had pulled the gag off and was kissing her fiercely on the lips, again and again. Mercy curled into a ball and Rio immediately wrapped her arms and legs around her Sub, keeping her presence light but comforting.   Rio saw our attention being directed their way and mouthed: 'Best Bitch Ever!' using her eyes to exaggerate the force of the words. Paige was still looking over the sticky mess that she had become.   "Put the contraption to soak in the big sink and take a shower," I suggested. Paige could see no flaw in my suggestion so she gave me a wink, unstrapped the device, and made her way out of the room.   When my eyes snapped back from watching a naked Paige exit, I saw that Hope's focus was on me.   "That looked fun," Hope stated clinically. "It is not for me but it definitely looked like they all felt, cleaner in a spiritual sense when they were done. I would never have suspected. In fact, I thought being bound was debasing and weak."   "It is called bondage and it is part of a sexual practice called BDSM, bondage, discipline, sadomasochism," I explained. "It definitely isn't for everyone, and certainly isn't as bizarre as Iona's furry fetish."   "Zane," Hope glared, "I saw a CSI episode on furries and you can't be an Asian or Asian-American high school girl in the United States and not know about cosplay; Iona and I are not into either one of those lifestyles I'm pretty sure."   While Hope was distracting me with her knowledge of other sexual subcultures, Iona snuck a hand beneath me and pinched my right ass cheek.   "Ow," I jumped. "What was that for, Beautiful?" I pleaded to Iona.   "I wanted to?" she responded meekly.   "That sounds like a perfectly good reason to me," I smiled. I would be somewhat offended if it was someone else but Iona was special; like Rio, she would always have my back, but unlike my chaotic fiend, she never abused my trust (or so I thought).   "Do me a favor?" Iona requested.   "Sure, anything for you," I answered right off the bat.   "Make her happy," Iona's eyes sparkled as the flickered to Hope. "Tickle my ear when you finish."   "Sure," I sighed with feigned regret, "if I have to."   "Thank you, Iona," Hope snorted in amusement, "I've got it from here."   "Nite-nite," Iona yawned, then rolled over and pretended to drop off to sleep. Like that was going to happen anytime soon!   "What no-, Hope got out before I rolled on top of her. I used one leg to wedge hers open, then settled between them as I lowered my body down. Hope looked at me quizzically.   "Touch me wherever you like," I instructed. I showed her what I meant by kissing her cheek, then edging around to suck on her earlobe.   Hope led off with her fingertips running along the muscles of my forearms and following a twisted trail up to my shoulders. With equal care, she began rubbing her toes along my calves, up to my knees and lower thighs. This had the added benefit of rotating her hips so that her pubic hair scratched along the veins of the base of my cock.   "You know this is going to make field work with you far more difficult," Hope murmured.   "Now you know what I've been going through for a month," I teased her back. "Now you know how I feel naked under your touch and so do I."   "You touch yourself much?" Hope giggled. Iona did her best to smother her own mirthful reaction.   "Maybe you should come to my bed more often to keep my hands otherwise occupied," I suggested. Hope arched her back, thrusting her breasts into my chest and laughed lyrically.   "Touch ," Hope conceded. "I wondered if I was imposing on your hospitality, wanting to spend tonight with you. Now I'm feeling as if I've been lured in and seduced by your masculine wiles."   "Zane, manipulating somebody!" Valarie gave a comedic gasp. "Well, there is always a first time for our ham-handed Lothario to launch a plot that doesn't involve him getting an extra fish stick for dinner."   "Ham-handed," Barbie Lynn mused. "His fingers are smoking but hardly ham-like," which she emphasized by rubbing her hand over her crotch.   "Do you often stick smoked country ham between your thighs, Barbie-Baby?" Valarie taunted.   "Only when your magic tongue and fingers aren't available," Barbie Lynn volleyed right back.   "Oh, you did not say that!" Valarie choked. She vaulted on top of Barbie Lynn and the two started wrestling. Vivian scooted toward the edge and fended off the combatants from rolling over her.   "When we graduate and drag you back to our dungeon to live, are you going to miss other bed partners having these mid-coital conversations?" Hope smirked.   "You underestimate your ability to focus my attention," I countered. When you are in bed with someone, you are in bed with THAT person, or so I believe. Hope's look sizzled, her body heated up, and she pulled me so close and tight, I couldn't make out any details beyond her eyes.   "I hate them," Hope purred.   "Who?" I worried. You don't want one good friend to hate another good friend. You really don't want a good friend with marksmanship skills out the ass not liking someone you have become attached to.   "Christina and Heaven," she sighed, but I knew she wasn't serious. "Christina because you would rather be with her and Heaven because she has you."   "Hope," I maneuvered so I could stroke her cheek, "I can't promise you or anyone else anything beyond this school year. Neither one of us qualifies as 'normal' by any definition of the word. I certainly like being with you, if that matters, and not just in bed. You are beautiful, intense, and serious in a way we shouldn't be."   "Serious is not the most intimate of descriptions," Hope joked, "but I think I know what you mean. As chaotic as your life is, I think we balance each other out." I didn't need words to agree with that; I let us return to our game of touch, kiss, and lick. We were getting back into a playful tempo when the fight between Valarie and Barbie Lynn ended.   There was no hot, spontaneous lesbian eruption; it devolved into Valarie having Barbie Lynn pinned with her wrists on the pillow held over her head. Valarie was trying to administer a 'Wet Willy' (sticking a finger, or tongue, into your opponent's ear) and finally succeeding.   "I give, I give," squealed Barbie Lynn. "Anything, just stop."   "Anything?" Valarie prodded suggestively. Barbie Lynn's very ample bosom heaved with each deep breath she took, which had the effect of rubbing them in circles against Valarie's dangling breasts.   "Come with me to the Southwest this summer," Valarie demanded. Barbie Lynn was still giving it serious thought when Paige came traipsing back in, drying her hair.   "Where in the Southwest?" Paige inquired. Valarie sat up on Barbie Lynn and looked over her shoulder at the albino lass.   "West of Laredo, East of the Pacific, South of Denver and North of Mexico," Valarie answered. "Sant Fe, Vegas, the Painted Desert, places like that." I didn't see coming what happened next.   "Valarie, would you consider allowing to me come along?" Paige asked politely.   "You really want to impress Zane that much?" Valarie divined Paige's intention.   "That, and he's most likely going with Rio as well," Paige responded, "so you are going to need all the help you can get." Rio didn't respond verbally, Mercy was still recovering, but glared with venom.   "What do you add to our little expedition?" Valarie asked.   "I'll do it," Barbie Lynn interjected. "I wasn't sure what I was going to do after graduation but seeing more of the world will do me good, and I hear it is cold in the desserts at night and I don't want Zane to catch a chill," she adds with a smile.   "I speak Spanish, plus a strong understanding of electronics, botany, and computers," Paige continued with a twinge of annoyance toward Barbie.   "Fine, both are in. We are getting our rides tomorrow afternoon at five," Valarie announced.   "Zane," Hope whispered, "I appreciate the silence of our first date now more than ever."   "We can go back to your place?" I offered.   "Oh, Chastity would love that," Hope snickered playfully. "I'm afraid if you don't ravish her in the next few weeks, she is going to rape Heaven."   "I'll keep that in mind, but right now I want to be where I am, with you," I kissed Hope's nose.   "Can I try something, Zane?" Hope turned serious and introspective.   "Of course," I said.   "Paige, come over here with me," Barbie Lynn suggested. The blonde wiggled over so that Valarie fell to the far side and indicated that Paige should join her.   "You only want to sex up my body," Paige accused Barbie Lynn, as she hopped onto the foot of the bed and put her fists defiantly on her hips.   "But of course I do, Paige-shugah," Barbie Lynn licked her lips, "now get over here and give me a taste."   "Oh. In that case, Paige scampered over and reclined next to the dynamite blonde. Barbie Lynn had a strong, subtly alluring persona while Paige was constantly aggressive.   "A naked Paige Zeller sexual molesting an equally naked Barbie Lynn Masters will go down as yet another thing I never thought I'd see," Hope mused.   "Be careful who you think is molesting who," I cautioned Hope. A few seconds later Paige shook and fluttered. Barbie Lynn had slid a stealthy hand between Paige's thighs.   "Oh, someone's been a bad little kitty," Barbie Lynn cooed, "A bad, soaking wet little kitty." Paige hiccupped, then shuddered again. "Does kitty need to be petted," Barbie asked as she stroked Paige's love box, "or does kitty need to be spanked?" And Barbie Lynn spanked Paige's cunt lightly, making Paige jerk.   "Master, I stand corrected," Hope nodded her head to me in respect of my sexual insight.   "You wanted to do something?" I brought Hope back on track.   "Yes, Zane, yes I did," Hope smiled. "Please lie on your back and close your eyes." It was my turn to nod as I complied with her wishes. She settled her haunches on my crotch and waited a moment.   First was a kiss, followed in slow progression by a finger, nose, earlobe, toe, two fingers coated in her juices, two fingers coated in Paige's juices, a nipple (most likely the right), her other nipple coated in Barbie Lynn's juices, Valarie's tongue (given away by the movement toward me), Hope's tongue, her other big toe, and ending with her lips and tongue. The anticipation of what was coming next was fun. As Hope reclined on top of me, Mercy finally began to stir.   "Were you a good little tramp tonight?" Rio panted hungrily at her partner.   "Yes, I, was I?" Mercy rasped. She was fighting to stay awake, her fatigue a heavy burden to bear.   "The Slut will say 'Yes Mistress; yes I was allowed to be good tonight'," Rio nuzzled Mercy's neck, ear, and jaw.   "Yes, Mistress," Mercy purred. "My wonderfully annoying Mistress allowed me to be good tonight." Rio spanked Mercy's burning hot ass flank hard. Mercy flinched and cried out in pain.   "Did I tell you to adlib, you annoying, frustrating skank," Rio taunted her, "or is my whore clever enough to sneak in an undeserved spanking?"   Mercy buried her face in a pillow but I could swear she was smiling.   "Nipple clamps for you in the morning, and I'm getting those bitches pierced on Saturday, got it?" Rio clarified the point by rolling each nipple between her forefinger and thumb. Mercy nodded but kept her face in the pillow. "Fine, let's get underneath the covers. Snuggle up with me to keep me warm, and you had better suckle my nipples.   Rio took up her normal sleeping area, avoiding the wet spot, with Mercy at her side, her tongue playing with Rio's left nipple.   "Mercy," Rio whispered. Mercy kept tongue-flicking the nipple but looked up.   "You rock," Rio said even softer. Mercy pulled more of her weary body over Rio as the nipple play continued and Rio began stroking her paramour's hair lovingly. In that relationship, it was getting harder to determine who the 'better' half was.   I searched around blindly for some lube, which had 'mystically' migrated under Barbie Lynn's pillow.   "Hope, put some oil on my cock and on your ass cleft," I told my Korean princess. She barely broke her iron mask of indifference before taking the bottle and doing as directed. I caught sight of Valarie, Vivian, and Barbie Lynn all peeking my way.   I imagined it was the curiosity about my apparent decision to 'break' Hope in anally.   "Hope, point my cock up and mount it," I directed. In theme with the game the two of us played, Hope took my commands without question, even to the point where her virginity was in question.   "Push it back," I stopped Hope's decent as it contacted her rather moist slit. She pushed back a little. Being a virgin, she probably wasn't sure where in the cunt, a cock should penetrate. "Farther back," I insisted, then again, "no, still farther." I felt my rod separate her ass cheeks as Hope slid on down. Only when her now soaking mound settled on my pubic bone did she figure out the game.   "Ah, that's cold," Valarie whispered to Vivian and Barbie Lynn.   "No ass sex for Hope tonight," lamented Barbie Lynn. My precious blonde really loved anal sex. I put my hands on Hope's hips to support her.   "Now ride me, Hope," I smiled. "Give me everything you've got."   Hope started out slow, working out a rhythm that pushed my shaft and cockhead as deep along her ass crack as possible. She even stopped for a moment and applied more lube. Soon she was thrusting hard back and up quickly, then allowing a long, leisurely ride back to my crotch. She bounced down on me again and again, her resounding impact on my crotch becoming a wetter, smacking sound.   Hope was powerful, vibrant, and strong; she needed little of the guidance provided by my hands on her hips. I decided to move my right hand to her finely groomed pubic hair, then to her soft pubic flesh itself. I alternated between splitting her lips open and massaging her clit. With my left hand, I coaxed stimulation from her right areola and nipple.   This time, instead of scarring me, Hope wrapped her fingers in her hair. She gave a few desperate convulsions, then her whole body tensed backwards.   "Zane! Oh, fuck!" she screamed. Her ass cheeks tried to squeeze my cock in a steel-tight vise but fortunately, the lube caused it to pop free before those buns of steel could turn my man-meat into ground beef (sometimes I visualize too graphically).   "I wouldn't believe it if I wasn't seeing it with my own eyes," Vivian sighed. "A girl comes to a boy

Texas man shot his neighbor because he thought her horse was getting too fat. French cyclist fell into a ravine and survived for 3 days on only wine. Man wearing only a Speedo broke into a 911 call center and attacked dispatch. // Weird AF News is the only daily weird news podcast in the world. Weird news 5 days/week and on Friday it's only Floridaman. SUPPORT by joining the Weird AF News Patreon http://patreon.com/weirdafnews - OR buy Jonesy a coffee at http://buymeacoffee.com/funnyjones Buy MERCH: https://weirdafnews.merchmake.com/ - Check out the official website https://WeirdAFnews.com and FOLLOW host Jonesy at http://instagram.com/funnyjones - wants Jonesy to come perform standup comedy in your city? Fill out the form: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfvYbm8Wgz3Oc2KSDg0-C6EtSlx369bvi7xdUpx_7UNGA_fIw/viewform

Hayden Evans runs the agency that looked after Batts, Speedo and more recently the Gray and Cresswell families. Hayden reflects on a good weekend for Leeds United and a contract now signed. EXCLUSIVE NordVPN Deal ➼ https://nordvpn.com/tsb · Try it risk-free now with a 30-day money-back guarantee | Try Huel with £10 OFF for New Customers today using my code thesquareball at https://huel.com/thesquareball. Fuel your best performance with Huel today! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Dave and Chuck the Freak talk about a video of an Amazon Flex driver tossing a package out of the window, body squeegee conversations from a 2018 podcast episode, he and his wife burp and fart a lot, came across a tent house in the woods, truck driver almost crossed Gordie Howe Bridge, update on trooper who lied about getting shot, a dad threatened a school because they didn’t have snack time, footage of Louvre thieves, new roundabout causing problems in CT, huge stingray found off coast of Rhode Island, man reunited with missing dog after 10 years, National Bologna Day, update on NBA gambling scandal, Kate Scott’s top popped open on live TV, update on Ghost Hunters guy whose wife tried to have him killed, Britney Spears seen acting erratically at restaurant, woman who refused to pay for meal at diner claimed she was married to Eminem, actor who played son in Poltergeist will hand out candy at Poltergeist house on Halloween, old guy attacked people at ER because the wait was too long, guy busted reckless driving, Lyft driver shot passenger for slamming his door, New Hampshire man in Speedo during break-in, father in trouble for staging inappropriate pictures of toddler with drugs and guns, bakery employee accused of hiding bathroom camera, dad and son stood in as security guards at California candy shop, guy struck by lightning twice, woman says she can communicate with dogs, guys jumped into frigid water to save whales, Ask Dave & Chuck The Freak, should he get a rub and tug?, husband wants separate lives after open marriage, he broke his penis during sex, and more!

The guy who played the son in 'Poltergeist' will hand out candy on Halloween from the actual house from movie, Today is National Bolonga Day and its still not clear why it is spelled that way, Man wearing nothing but a Speedo, ball cap and black shoes attempts to barge into a sheriff's dispatcher office in New Hampshire

Chaz and AJ sent the world's most low-maintenance pet, Perfect Polly off to Bad Idea Island for the world's worst commercial. (0:00)  In Dumb Ass News, a man wearing a hat and Speedo attacked emergency responders at a 911 dispatch center. (4:45)  Brian Foley was on the phone with Chaz and AJ to break down the details of the NBA gambling scandal, including fixed poker games, and also the brazen and viral robbery of the Louvre. (16:18)  Paul Myers, brother to Mike, was on the phone with Chaz and AJ to talk about his book about John Candy. The book has no connection to the documentary, though the camps have shared conversations and info. Paul shared how John was originally "tricked" into doing comedy by Dan Aykroyd. (28:04)  Commander Keith hates Halloween, and spent his Top 5 list yelling about why he's happy to be a Halloween Scrooge. (35:59) 

50-year-old Cory Nickerson was caught on surveillance cameras sneaking his way into the Hillsborough County Sheriff's Office and allegedly assaulting two dispatchers. What really stood out was Cory's "attire". He was wearing a hat ... and a Speedo. This was in New Hampshire?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Someone is trying to impersonate Sammy Hagar...things turned ugly at a McDonald's when they told customers they were too busy to take any more orders...and a 50-year-old man attacked a sheriff's office dressed only in a Speedo!

Cops chased a wanted man in a Speedo out of a mud bath at a spa...3 men broke into an amusement park to steal over 200 stuffed animals...and a high school football coach got a DUI after putting his truck into a ditch!

The UK marketplace game follows its own rules - and most European brands still play by the wrong ones. In this episode, Valerie and Ingrid talk with Neil Lauderdale (ex-Pentland, Speedo, Ellesse, Canterbury) about what really drives marketplace success in the UK. They discuss why Zalando and ASOS are overrated, while Next, Very, John Lewis, Debenhams, and M&S shape the market - and how Decathlon is becoming a powerful launchpad for Europe. Neil shares how logistics and local setup make or break a brand post-Brexit, and what Pentland learned as one of the first brands on TikTok Shop - where success demands creator thinking and massive content output.The takeaway: winning in the UK means a differentiated marketplace strategy built on local retail structures - with clear roles for each platform: Premium, Off-Price, Social, Experimental. Note from the sponsor Pixelmoda:Founded in Milan in 2021, Pixelmoda specializes in AI-assisted image and video production. The key feature is that the AI does not generate the images, but supports the team and models in taking the best possible shots quickly by optimizing camera position, lightning, model poses, and so on. This significantly shortens production time and reduces costs up to 70 % for photo production and up to 90 % for video production. Pixelmoda produces over 14 million images and videos per year. Its customers include over 100 brands from more than 20 countries, including three of the top five global online marketplaces and lots of luxury brands. If you want to learn more about this, tune in once again in episode 126 where Ingrid and Valerie were talking to Gianni Serratzi, CEO of Pixelmoda. https://player.captivate.fm/episode/6466a3af-41fb-4fb1-98a1-0ab647a2cc41/Note from the sponsor Taxdoo:Taxdoo supports retailers and brands with a comprehensive platform for completing sales tax returns and accounting processes in a legally compliant and efficient manner. And this important part of your marketplace business is also increasingly being taken over by AI. That's why Jan Utterrodt, Head of Support at tax tech company Taxdoo, is our guest on episode 131 of Let's talk Marketplace. Topics will include how AI can help speed up tax processes and reduce costs, and how AI can assist with correct sales tax returns - depending on the country and product. After all, shortcomings in the handling of customs and sales tax payments can quickly get retailers into serious trouble. So tune in in three weeks' time - it's definitely worth it!

Bienvenue dans l'univers délirant de Carbone 14 ! Dans cet épisode, Supernana et Speedo s'attaquent sans filtre aux sujets qui fâchent : la fidélité dans le couple, l'argent et les aventures d'un soir. Rien n'est tabou et chaque question devient prétexte à des débats enflammés et des punchlines aussi absurdes que provocatrices.

Did Surfers Kill The Speedo_ - MGTOWSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/mgtow/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Ingmar Stadelmann & Andreas O. Loff fassen die Ausgabe 212 des Podcasts Lanz & Precht zusammen.Tickets für die ApoFika Tour mit Micky Beisenherz & Andreas Loff: https://contracreate.com/dates/Ticket für die Show "Stadelmann liest Höcke": https://www.ingmarstadelmann.de/stadelmannliesthoecke/Gin & Talk: https://ginandtalk.com/Wunderbare Sprecherin der Rubriken: Franziska Weisz Coverdesign: Hands of God Folgt uns auf InstagramIngmar Stadelmann: https://www.instagram.com/ingmarstadelmann/ Andreas Loff: https://www.instagram.com/andreas.loff/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Brittney wants to get revenge on her boyfriend Shane after he showed up to a family pool party in a Speedo! Follow us on socials! @themorningmess

This episode originally aired in 2022. Join us on Thursday for a brand-new interview. Nine of the top ten killers are related to metabolism, so if you're carrying around extra pounds, your grievance isn't with the Speedo. In today's episode we explore ways to burn inflammatory fat, thus eliminating diseases that result from a compromised metabolism. Commusings is our format where we take a moment to think deeply on the topics of spirituality, philosophy, and culture. For more musings and quotes, visit jeffkrasno.substack.com.

When police decide they're going to arrest you, they don't really care what you're up to at the time. Alec Bogus was in a mud bath at Indian Hot Springs in Colorado when cops made their move. Then he made HIS move and got away ... for a little while.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Headline of the Week contender: Man covered in mud, wearing only a Speedo runs from police, Japan's 'rent-a-person' industry continues to expand with rollout of 'rent-a-scary' looking person service, Brand new luxury yacht rolls, sinks 15 minutes into maiden voyage and the proud owner of the vessel had to swim to shore...

Full shows from each day.

It's your Ill-Advised News, the stupid criminals of the day. Support the show and follow us here Twitter, Insta, Apple, Amazon, Spotify and the Edge! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

A million-dollar yacht sank as it was being launched for its maiden voyage...cops chased a man from a spa who was covered in mud and wearing a Speedo....and a man who pitted his truck against a train tried to hide from cops in an abandoned refrigerator! 

Bryan is so close to shoving something in his butthole. Let's talk about that, the embarrassment of getting stuck in a tube slide as a grown-ass man, why can't we put whatever little pictures we want on our license plates, messing everything up when you're only just trying to help, and more on today's episode of Can You Don't?!*** Wanna become part of The Gaggle and access all the extra content on the end of each episode PLUS tons more?! Our Patreon page is LIVE! This is the biggest way you can support the show. It would mean the world to us: http://www.patreon.com/canyoudontpodcast ***New Episodes every Wednesday at 12pm PSTWatch on Youtube: https://youtu.be/VatYmuRN0KMSend in segment content: heyguys@canyoudontpodcast.comMerch: http://canyoudontpodcast.comMerch Inquires: store@canyoudontpodcast.comFB: http://facebook.com/canyoudontpodcastIG: http://instagram.com/canyoudontpodcastYouTube Channel: https://bit.ly/3wyt5rtOfficial Website: http://canyoudontpodcast.comCustom Music Beds by Zach CohenFan Mail:Can You Don't?PO Box 1062Coeur d'Alene, ID 83816Hugs and Tugs.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week Kumar joins us after helping us with some IT issues we were having... WE KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING!!! We talk about the Aurora Mud man, Alec Bogus, who escaped police in Indian Hot Springs covered in Mud wearing only a Speedo. We break down what the hell is going on in Dallas, and Travis rounds out the episode with a tale of relieving himself on some chickens, who mysteriously passed days later... Is he the Tinkle Bandit???#MudMan #IndianHotSprings #FleeingSuspect #MicahParsons #JerryJones #DallasCowboys #RelievingYourself #GoingNumber1Next time you're maxin' and relaxin' on the john, make sure to subscribe to our YouTube, and like and follow us on all of our socials!

Dave and Chuck the Freak talk about when parents should stop being naked around their kids, winning the genetic lottery, Michigan suspect demanded Faygo pop, man teased bison at Yellowstone, man caught illegally entering Canada on kayak, fire started by mobile charger on a plane, meth heads squatted in family’s home, movers dropped family’s belongings on road, motorcyclists forced old man on e-bike off the road, ‘millions’ of cockroaches fall through ceiling, Amazon driver who took cat returned it, group of crypto traders claim to be behind WNBA dildo throwing, NFL will no longer supply smelling salts, first female umpire in MLB, John Cena says he likes his new hair transplant, Kevin Federline will release tell-all book, Macauley Culkin’s stunt double was grown man, Matthew McConaughey almost played Jack in Titanic, Heat 2 may star Leo DiCaprio, movies opening in theatres this weekend, Paris Hilton’s new jet, Selena Gomez’s fiancé sprays her perfume to remind him of her, diner seat cushion Justin Bieber sat on for sale, woman got a creepy massage, customer busted Amazon driver jerking in her room, old man got stuck on train tracks, guy got into fight with strip club janitor, drunk woman driving wearing only bath robe, German tourist seen driving on motorcycle completely nude, parrot repeated owner’s slang leading to drug bust, woman using Hinge app to find hot handymen, man busted speeding in his Ferrari, Ask Dave & Chuck The Freak, he was harassed because of his Speedo, dating someone his children’s age, GF wants him to be on phone all the time, wife makes all the decisions, and more!

If you're restoring a classic Volkswagen, chances are you've thought about the details that make your VW truly authentic – and few details matter more than a properly restored speedometer. Steve Burdett is one of the most interesting craftsmen in the hobby today. With a background in shaping fiberglass and building custom surfboards, Steve has always had a gift for creating things by hand. When the surfboard industry began to slow, he turned his skills toward another passion – vintage vehicles. Having restored Vespas and Lambretta scooters, Steve's love for mechanical artistry eventually brought him back to his first automotive love: Volkswagens. After buying back his original Super Beetle from his brother, Steve began rebuilding VW speedometers, combining precision craftsmanship with a deep passion for the hobby. Today, through his business SpeedoKing.com, he offers expert speedometer restoration, repair, and customization for classic Volkswagen Beetles, Buses, Karmann Ghias, and more. In this episode, we dive into the world of VW speedometer restoration – from common issues to watch for, to performance upgrades, custom faces, and personalized touches that make your dash stand out. Whether you're restoring a split-window Beetle, a '60s Bus, or a Type 3, Steve shares insider tips and stories that only come from years of hands-on experience. If you care about authenticity, craftsmanship, and working with someone who truly loves the Volkswagen hobby, this episode is a must-listen. www.letstalkdubs.com www.vwtrendsmagazine.com www.rosswulf.com Use code LTD10 for 10%off Buy ICON pistons here 

Welcome to the Today is the Day Changemaker Podcast.You know that feeling when laughter fills a room - the kind that draws people closer? That's what this episode is all about. Welcome to the Today is the Day Changemakers Podcast.This week, I'm joined by my special guest cohost, Michael Gershe - speaker, comedian, photographer, and author of The Magic of Life: A Son's Story of Hope After Tragedy, Grief, and a Speedo. He is also a senior advisor at Kent State University's Professional Pilot Program, and if you missed his full story on a previous episode, be sure to go back and listen—it's powerful.Together, Michael and I explore the incredible backgrounds of Lenny Dave and Kermit Cole, co-founders of the upcoming Humor Camp 2025.

Dave and Chuck the Freak talk about former NBA player Dahntay Jones caught on camera picking butt, place where you can take a bath with otters, guy who looks like Chuck in Happy Gilmore 2, cuck saddle, emailer travels for work and saw lady take shoes off on plane, man stabbed 11 people at Walmart, flight evacuation in Denver, another near-collision mid-air, guy rented a car and found drugs inside, couple seen finger-banging at baseball game, video of MMA fighter flipping out on flight crew, Christian Wilkins cut from Raiders for kissing teammate, NFL fining players for selling Super Bowl tickets, MLB speedway classic has ticket sales exceeding 85k, 98-year-old still bowling, Fantastic Four box office numbers, Fantastic Four popcorn bucket, how funny do Americans think Adam Sandler is?, Netflix with Prince Harry and Meghan Markle, Tom Cruise at Oasis show with Ana de Armas, old lady stung by swarm of bees, man assaulted golfer for playing too slowly, guy wins court case after Google Street View car catches him naked, old lifeguard has been working there almost 60 years, message written on pizza box, TSA discovered turtles in woman’s bra, intruder makes herself comfortable in family’s home while they’re on vacation, guy rammed into another guy and left on hover board, man shot drone out of sky, new Cedar Point ride broken down several times, another ride malfunction, picture of guy in Speedo gets mocked on Today Show, canned foods that were popular 50 years ago, and more! This episode of Dave & Chuck is brought to you in part by Profluent http://bit.ly/4fhEq5l

There is a new trend on TikTok that teaches you how to have ChatGPT tell you about your flaws! Producer Julie explains the trend and she, Anna, and Raven try it! Raven has a new baby in the family and Anna quizzes him to see if he did any of the top things that are considered proper etiquette when visiting a baby! About half of Americans still sleep with their Loveys as adults! Anna's 16-year-old daughter sleeps with Orange, Producer Julie just got a new stuffy, and Raven sleeps with a pillow…?  Are you up to date on this week's biggest news story? Anna and Raven will get you caught up on the trending news including the heartbreaking passing of Malcolm-Jamal Warner. They reflect on his very successful career and send their condolences to his family. There is a dad who is pro-Speedo! People say Jenna Bush Hager was body shamming when she said that she didn't want to see man-thigh! Anna asked her husband and Raven if they would wear them! Scottie Scheffler continues to set records in the golf world but said it's not the most important thing in his life! Anna agrees that he has a point but are his statements realistic? Raven explains how he drives when his grandson is in the car and Anna has a list of other times people drive like a 90-year-old grandmother! Does this sound like you? There are three major companies, Southwest, Starbucks, and Target all have major announcements! You will want to hear this! Mercury is in Retrograde until mid to late August, and this is a time where miscommunication occurs more often! You may want to cancel your haircut appointment! Steve and Angie's ten-year-old son has a friend that comes over often. He eats a lot of their food. He helps himself to the pantry, the fridge, and whatever else he wants. Steve is upset; it's expensive and rude. Angie thinks he's just a kid and his parents are always working, give him a break. It's not a big deal, they have enough to share! What do you think? Mary and Monte have a chance to win $2600! All they have to do is answer more pop culture questions than Raven in Can't Beat Raven! 

Kellie and Allen are looking forward to the next Podcast Family Vacation by taking a look back at one of the biggest and best! For Allen's 50th birthday, he celebrated in a flesh colored Speedo with "cocky" on the front and "show stealer" on the back. Will he explain why? Listen and find out! Should Kellie and Allen plan another Podcast Family Vacation in 2026? Let them know at Podcast@KellieandAllen.com.  Thank you to our podcast sponsor!  Try  your trusty favorites with an exclusive set for our listners. New customers can get the Liquid Lash Extensions mascara and a mini-sized Brilliant Eye Brightener at a special set price with free shipping, available at ThriveCausemetics.com/SANDWICH OR save more with 20% off your first order at ThriveCausemetics.com/SANDWICH.   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/AMERICANENGLISH and get on your way to being your best self. In this immersive summer episode, you'll escape to the sun-drenched shores of an American beach and soak up advanced vocabulary, phrasal verbs, and collocations—all beach-themed and delivered in under 10 minutes (ish

London Pride is a hit and the Royal Family helped celebrate...was everyone on board with this? Gay man is assaulted in Ptown during Bear Week...was this a hate crime? Media warns of 'Speedo Summer' that will be worn by the gays and straight men.... Tips on manscaping and what gay men really like Just what does AI think about gay men in various cities and what are the trends? David Archuleta is living his best life and owning being gay and more. Kodi Maurice talks about his new single, "I Don't Wanna Fight" and the direction of his singing career... Follow Steve V. on IG: @iam_stevev Follow Kodi on IG: @mistahmaurice Follow Jeremy on IG: @jrosslopez Rate and Review us! Wanna drop a weekly or one time tip to TAGSPODCAST - Show your love for the show and support TAGS! Visit our website: tagspodcast.com Needs some advice for a sex or relationship conundrum? Ask TAGS! DM US ON IG or https://www.talkaboutgaysex.com/contact Follow Of a Certain Age on IG: @ofacertainagepod

 This week we are turning from lizard to man and back to lizard again as we discuss “Mulder and Scully Meet the Were-Monster”! We're talking the return of Darin Morgan, our long-awaited jokes about Mulder and cell phones, the Kim Manners tribute :( , how much Darin Morgan wants Scully to have a dog, and Smart Phones… Is Us! We welcome back the legendary red Speedo, lightly rib Kumail Nanjiani our (very real) podcast competition, narrowly avoid embarrassing New Zealand by trying to do Rhys Darby's accent, and debate if we should change our names to Guy Mann.  Send us an email at scullynationpod@gmail.com or follow us on Instagram! 

It's a bird! It's a plane! It's... Duckie from PRETTY IN PINK? 
No, wait! It's SUPERMAN IV: THE QUEST FOR PEACE!To gear up for the release of SUPERMAN, Steve and Justin are talking about the fourth installment of the original Superman film series—and Christopher Reeve's final flight in the world's most famous Speedo.And who better to take the reins for the big finale than Cannon Films, who, in the same year as QUEST FOR PEACE, also released the deep-bench sequels Death Wish 4 and American Ninja III. It's a cheap, flimsy whimper of an ending for the legendary franchise, and killed any other Superman movies for 19 years. Not even Lex Luthor could have done as much damage to the Man of Steel.BUY OUR MERCH! Follow us on Instagram to stay updated about our monthly live shows!Check out more from Justin here: justindodd.rocks Check out more from Steve here: stevejhward.comdrinkgenies.com

We speak with Doug Conklyn, Speedo’s senior vice-president of global design, on the return of the brief and the power of the Speedo brand.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Summer is a time when change seems more possible than ever. But is that really how it happens? Can people actually reinvent themselves in the warmer months? This week, we present stories — and some comedy — about people and their summer selves. Visit thisamericanlife.org/lifepartners to sign up for our premium subscription.Prologue: Host Ira Glass reflects on his feelings about going to the beach. (3 minutes)Act One: Producer Dana Chivvis explores the case of a 66-year-old working lifeguard who is suing New York State for age discrimination after refusing to wear a Speedo on the job. (16 minutes)Act Two: A troupe of comedians tells personal stories about summer experiences and improvises scenes based on them. (23 minutes)Act Three: Producer Neil Drumming tells the story of his dad and his family's timeshare in Orlando, Florida. (14 minutes)Transcripts are available at thisamericanlife.orgThis American Life privacy policy.Learn more about sponsor message choices.

Dave and Chuck the Freak talk about Jason chairs in hotel rooms, Craigslist ad of guy needing help around the house posted picture of his penis, Mega Babe anti-chafing stick, woman who created Miracle Mop auctioning off her estate, what’s your ‘I do this now so future me doesn’t suffer’ thing?, guy beat a dude with a plunger, mobile home lifted by tornado, woman had 52 cats in motel room, undercover sting discovers dirty kitchen conditions, couple stranded on lake, gators arrive after jet ski broke down, Rays shortstop found guilty, Justin Tucker suspended, Jason Kelce stripped down to Speedo, Marlins player took ball to junk, Gronk invested in Apple, Brad Pitt has home robbed, Diddy trial closing arguments, Scarlett Johansson kisses co-star, Dune and Blade Runner director will direct next Bond movie, new Social Network movie, F1 opens in theaters, new Golden Bachelor, most expensive Star Wars toys, Sarah McLachlan can’t watch the dog commercials either, cop resigned after getting busted pick pocketing during traffic stop, Patches Magickbeans, plane passenger threw tantrum, Prime Minister offered to show his penis to prove religion, nightmare neighbor, what’s the biggest food mistake you’ve made?, woman who shoved nachos down wife’s pants during fight, Ask Dave & Chuck The Freak, why does his aunt keep bringing up aunt porn?, buddy wanted to borrow suit jacket, guy wants to reclaim the pineapple, GF won’t start family unless married, old driver crashed into liquor store, utility worker’s truck hit by truck while up in cherry picker, and more!

On this episode, Aries and Andy talk about R.I.P. Sly, Beth Spies appreciation, Andy & his comics, Salt & Pepper, black mental awareness, horror characters, Marc MVP, and Karate Mouse. Social Media Instagram: @SpearsBergPod Twitter: @SpearsBergPod Facebook: SpearsBergPod Patreon: SpearsBergPod Youtube: SpearsBergPod  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

BJ revealed to us that he owns a pair of speedos and he loves wearing them!

00:00 – 14:13 – GAME EFFIN’ SEVEN! The Pacers rout the Thunder to push the series to a decisive game on Sunday, Haliburton’s performance despite the calf strain, TJ McConnell steps up again, Obi Toppin’s performance, the Speedo Game 14:14 – 34:07 – Key moments for the Pacers’ win last night, Haliburton’s pre-game and how he performed last night, callers react to Game 6 last night, who has the advantage in Game 7, how the Thunder should be approaching Sunday, Tony Bradley 34:08 – 44:15 - – Kevin’s Speedo is one win away from being donned, potential parade plans?, Tyrese Haliburton’s performance and how his calf can hold up for one more game, more callers react to Game 6Support the show: https://1075thefan.com/the-wake-up-call-1075-the-fan/See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

... JT actually knows the names of the women who host the TODAY show!!!! ... Looney will tell you how get Speedo ready for the summer!  AND REMEMBER: Apologizing means that you care more about the relationship than being right!

Jamie Ward joins us for the final episode of the series discussing making one of the most hated transfers in English football (leaving Derby for Forest) to the insane security at Euro 2016 with Northern Ireland, where they shut down a McDonald's just so the lads could grab a burger. Starting his career at Aston Villa in the David O'Leary years, Ward struggled to break through so left to go Torquay United where Helen Chamberlin was taking care of the youth players in the midsts of ownership chaos. Reflecting on Ward's time at Sheffield United he recalls just how starstruck he was when meeting Gary Speed and how he handled the transition into managing. With stories about getting sold all from failing a bleep test which lead to some of the greatest team bonding trips to Miami under Nigel Clough. While we will be taking a short break on the main series head over to our Patreon where the episodes will keep on coming: https://tinyurl.com/2p8pts4a

Jon and Chantel talk annoying sounds, aiport moving walkways and if this is the summer where speedos become a fashion trend. Plus, Chase from the foodie Instagram account SLC Foodie. A brand new 7:30 2nd Date Update, Normal or Nope, and What's Poppin'!

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The Alan Cox Show

Do you have friends that owe you money? What is a weird way you've caught someone cheating? They say it will be a speedo summer ... are you rockin one? What is a perfect vacation to you? What does it look like? See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

On this week's episode, Mike has been everywhere, man, and Scotty and JP have a Sunday at the pool bar. Avocados taste nothing like damp Doc Martens, and the WNBA is seriously trying to cancel itself even worse than normal. is AI overrated or underrated, and how often should you change your bedding? What are some rejected names for some poker hands, and if JP were straight, what kind of girl would he date? What are some countries you would never want to visit, and could you tolerate Derek wearing a Speedo around you every day? Enjoy another episode, and keep on laughing!

This week on Just Sayin', Justin Martindale welcomes comedian Joe List to talk stand-up, his new special, "Small Ball" in theaters May 21st and his upcoming documentary "Tom Dustin: Portrait of a Comedian". Justin also get's into the Gaga's bomb threat news, Katy Perry's space flight backlash, Belichick defending his girlfriend, and Elizabeth Hurley dating Billy Ray Cyrus. Plus, Nick Cannon's $10M insurance policy, Pee-wee's bike auction, Megan Thee Stallion's Popeyes project, and a dad taking his child for a walk being mistaken for homeless man. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dax Shepard was sneaking a peak over someone's shoulder while at a Broadway show, and saw something interesting. Plus, one actor almost got arrested while doing a photoshoot in a yellow speedo. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this Pop Culture Thursday, Jared dives into this week's juiciest celebrity gossip and trending news stories! From JoJo Siwa's candid comments on her evolving sexuality to Penn Badgley's honest reflections on dating Blake Lively during Gossip Girl, no headline is off limits.Jared weighs in on Dave Portnoy's new relationship reveal, the internet's fascination with Barron Trump's online gaming habits, and the surprising fact about Ashley Tisdale turning 40. Plus, hear John Cena open up about his shocking hair transformation sparked by bullying, and Joshua Jackson shares relationship lessons from his past. The episode wraps with a reaction to Walton Goggins' steamy photoshoot that's got everyone talking.With his signature mix of humor and hot takes, Jared brings you a must-listen pop culture recap perfect for your Thursday scroll!!Support the podcast by supporting our sponsors!MyBookie Support the show and use code JTRAIN on MyBookie to double your money instantly on your 1 st deposit. Head to https://www.mybookie.ag/