Parenting Without Power Struggles

In this episode, Susan shares an excerpt from a past session with Byron Katie, whose self-inquiry method, The Work, has deeply influenced her parenting approach. Katie's process helps parents question and shift stressful beliefs to improve their relationships with their children. Susan invites listeners to join her class with Katie to learn more about these transformative techniques. https://go.susanstiffelman.com/byron-katie-class-podcast

In this episode, Susan talks with Julie Lythcott-Haims about the challenges of parenting, particularly as children transition into adulthood. They discuss the ways in which parents' roles evolve as their children grow, and the importance of parents modeling healthy adult behavior for their children. Julie describes the ultimate goal of parenting as raising independent and resilient adults who can thrive on their own. https://susanstiffelman.com/julie-lythcott-haims-young-adult-podcast/

In this episode, Susan explores the challenges children face with restlessness, fidgetiness, and hyperactivity, particularly in the school environment. She emphasizes the importance of movement, play, and imagination in child development, noting that traditional classroom settings may not always accommodate natural developmental needs. Susan suggests practical strategies for parents and schools to support children, such as incorporating brief movement breaks and providing tools for fidgeting. http://pages.susanstiffelman.com/podcast-fidgety-kids

In this episode, Susan talks with Dr. Gabor Maté about attachment instincts, peer orientation, and the importance of parental presence in building a strong parent-child relationship. Dr. Maté explains how children's attachment to peers can affect their behavior and relationships, emphasizing the need for parents to maintain primary attachment with their children. https://pages.susanstiffelman.com/gabor-mate-podcast-episode

In this episode, Susan talks with her friend and colleague, Robyn Posin, PhD. They discuss Robyn's book, "Go Only as Fast as Your Slowest Part Feels Safe to Go: Tales to Kindle Gentleness and Compassion for Our Exhausted Selves." They explore the importance of slowing down in today's fast-paced world, the need for rest as a sacred act, and the significance of mental and emotional well-being. Robyn shares practical tips and anecdotes to prioritize self-care and embrace a more mindful approach to life. http://pages.susanstiffelman.com/robyn-posin-podcast-episode

In this episode, Susan talks with Dr. Dan Siegel on breaking dysfunctional patterns we've inherited from our own parents and grandparents. They discuss how early interactions with caregivers shape individuals and how tendencies and behaviors can be inherited through epigenetics. Dan also explains the concept of neuroplasticity, offering hope that parents can reshape their brains to become more integrated and resilient. http://pages.susanstiffelman.com/podcast-generational-healing

In this episode, Susan coaches a new parent struggling to adjust to life with their 11-month-old baby. The parent expresses challenges in maintaining balance in their life after the baby's arrival. Susan emphasizes the importance of honest, open conversation in addressing these struggles and the need for  vulnerable discussions with partners. http://pages.susanstiffelman.com/podcast-new-baby

In this episode, Susan coaches a parent whose kids have a hard time adjusting to the different rules and boundaries in their parents' two homes. Susan reassures this parent that boundaries help kids feel safe and secure in their attachment and role-plays a scenario to help this parent communicate for effectively with their kids. http://pages.susanstiffelman.com/boundaries-two-houses-podcast

In this episode, Susan helps a parent with an unusual dilemma: their family will be traveling for a year, and their young daughter is resistant to the idea. Susan discusses the importance of making it safe for the child to express fears while remaining clear and relaxed. http://pages.susanstiffelman.com/helping-child-travel-podcast

In this episode, you'll hear Susan talking with the parent of a forgetful, somewhat disorganized teen with ADHD without micromanaging. This conversation goes deep, looking at how our anxiety can muddy the waters of effective parenting. http://pages.susanstiffelman.com/podcast-teen-adhd

In this episode, Susan talks with a parent who struggles with what she calls "ancestral anger" toward her preschooler -- a feeling of rage that stems from an unhealed part of her own childhood. Susan coaches this parent on handling the build up of rage when it makes its next appearance with her child. http://pages.susanstiffelman.com/podcast-ancestral-anger

In this episode, Susan talks with a parent who wants help supporting her middle child. Her 7-year-old daughter is struggling with the disappointment and frustration of being a middle child, so Susan uses a role-play to coach this parent on helping her child grieve the reality of her unchanging position in the family. http://pages.susanstiffelman.com/podcast-middle-child

In this episode, Susan talks with Kelsey, who shares her experience with her assertive, expressive 7- and 9-year-old daughters. The conversation emphasizes the balance between respecting children's autonomy and fulfilling the responsibilities of a parent. They talk about how the daughters resist taking medicine and how Kelsey can acknowledge her daughters' autonomy while also ensuring they get the medical care they need. https://pages.susanstiffelman.com/taking-medicine-podcast

In this episode, Susan coaches a parent, "Marie," who discusses her large family, including two children on the autism spectrum. She's looking for advice on encouraging more friendly, positive interactions between her five children. Susan coaches Marie on managing children with high functioning autism, focusing on executive functioning, and emphasizing the unique strengths and challenges of each child. http://pages.susanstiffelman.com/coaching-podcast-friendly-siblings

In this episode, Susan shares her thoughts on navigating the holiday season, reflecting on the relentless pace of modern life, the challenges posed by technology, and the importance of taking time to recharge. Susan also talks about her personal practice of unplugging for several weeks and the positive impact it has on her well-being. https://pages.susanstiffelman.com/catching-your-breath-podcast

Susan talks with Dr. Pressman about the five guiding principles for raising a good human: relationships, reflection, regulation, rules, and repair. They stress the importance of being a "good enough" parent, rather than striving for perfection, and emphasize that imperfection is a natural part of being human. http://pages.susanstiffelman.com/aliza-pressman-podcast-episode

In this episode, Susan coaches a parent whose son is reluctant to go to school because his feelings have been getting hurt at recess. Susan offers a kid-friendly way to help her child take things less personally by looking at the Bad B's (negative beliefs) that fuel his insecurities. https://susanstiffelman.com/reluctant-school-child-podcast/

Susan responds to a parent's question about how to become the Captain of the ship if you grew up with permissive parents who gave you whatever you wanted, sharing important insights into making the shift to setting loving limits with kids. https://susanstiffelman.com/captain-podcast/

In this episode, Susan answers a parent's question about a child's difficulty with disappointment. She emphasizes the importance of  grounding oneself before setting limits to support children and shares tips to better help children cope with frustrating experiences. https://susanstiffelman.com/frustration-podcast/

In this episode, Susan talks about why setting screen-time limits can be so difficult, and why there's so much push back from our kids when it's time to unplug, sharing strategies for implementing healthy rules and routines. https://susanstiffelman.com/screen-time-limits-podcast/

In this preview from the Tech-Wise Parenting Summit, Jack and Trudy remind listeners that being present and aware can help us engage with technology in healthy ways, rather than feeling drained and depleted, or turning to screens to hide from uncomfortable feelings. In the full summit interview, Trudy also walks us through a 7 minute Appreciation Body Scan, providing a calming, restful experience that all will enjoy!

In this preview clip from the Tech-Wise Parenting Summit, Dr. Tina Payne Bryson talks about the impression a child is left with when we react with anger to their angere over screen time limits, and how it influences their future willingness to come to us when they're upset.

Susan shares a preview clip from a conversation with author and filmmaker Tiffany Shlain from the Tech-Wise Parenting Summit, discussing the benefits of a 24 hour weekly ritual of unplugging from technology.

In this preview clip from the Tech-Wise Parenting Summit, Dr. Anna Lembke (author of Dopamine Nation) suggesting that rather than turning to screens and social media to lessen feelings of depression, online activities may actually generate depression in some instances when long-term tech use fuels reduced natural dopamine production in the brain.

Susan shares a preview clip from an interview with Dr. Dan Siegel from the Tech-Wise Parenting Summit. Dan and Susan engage in a short role play to demonstrate how conversations lacking in the many aspects of communication missing in online exchanges can lead to disconnection and misunderstanding.

In this conversation, Susan and Dayna talk about how important it is to understand that even if our child has behavioral struggles, they aren't broken and we aren't failing. They go on to discuss creating a plan for parenting storms, not taking things personally, and shifting our perspective. https://susanstiffelman.com/dayna-abraham-podcast/

One of the biggest power struggles parents have with their kids is around technology. In this episode, Susan talks about the importance of clarity as we set realistic routines around screen time, emphasizing the importance of being the “Captain of the ship” for our kids, to offer guidance and support. https://susanstiffelman.com/kids-and-tech-podcast/

A parent whose son complains about her singing asks for advice about helping him be more comfortable with self-expression and using his voice. Susan shares some interesting ideas for how to approach the situation. https://susanstiffelman.com/nurturing-expressiveness-podcast/

In this excerpt of a class about homework with Dr. William Stixrud and Ned Johnson, authors of The Self-Driven Child, Susan explores the anxiety parents often feel around their kids' unwillingness to take their school work seriously. https://susanstiffelman.com/stixrud-johnson-podcast-2/

Enjoy a fascinating conversation with Mei-Ling Hopgood about her adventures in parenting around the world, from raising her children in Argentina where bedtimes are often “flexible” to looking at how play, meals, and chores are approached in other cultures. A delightful discussion that may help parents feel a bit more flexible in their child-rearing practices. 

At a time when headlines are filled with dire warnings about the mental health of our adolescents, this information-packed session with Dr. Lisa Damour offers vital guidance for parents—including those with younger kids—about how to navigate the ups and downs that come with growing up. https://susanstiffelman.com/lisa-damour-teen-podcast-episode/

Did you know that 15% to 20% of the population are highly sensitive people? Yet many parents struggle to understand their deeply feeling children. In this episode, Susan explains the trait of sensitivity and shares 3 of the most important things to keep in mind to help you nurture and support your sensitive child. https://susanstiffelman.com/raising-sensitive-kids-podcast-episodes/

In this episode, Susan reassures listeners that aggressive behavior is common, and talks about some of the elements that often fuel a child's angry outbursts. She also addresses a few important ways we can reduce its frequency. https://susanstiffelman.com/aggression-podcast-podcast-episode/

In this powerful episode, Susan talks about the underlying, invisible elements—often remnants of our own childhood-- that sometimes fuel our anger, frustration, or despair as we deal with the daily challenges of parenting. https://susanstiffelman.com/making-long-term-change-podcast-episode/

In this episode, Susan answers a question submitted by a parents about his son to play team sports, even though his son refuses. Many parents will relate to this question! https://susanstiffelman.com/team-sports-podcast-episode/

In this episode, you'll hear Susan talk about the benefits of creating a Family Mission Statement to get your new year off to a solid start. Even young children can participate in this attachment-building family activity! https://susanstiffelman.com/mission-statement-podcast-episode/

In this episode, you'll hear Susan role play a scenario with a child who's refusing to turn off the TV to take a bath, as she talks about the importance of taking on smaller parenting challenges to get better at coping with push back and disconnection. A great episode with lots of practical value! https://susanstiffelman.com/climbing-hills-instead-of-mountains-podcast/

Susan explores how to help kids and teens who are anxious, worried or fearful. You'll learn the importance of being the calm, regulated Captain of the ship to help our kids confront anxiety and learn strategies to cope with fear and build resilience. https://susanstiffelman.com/when-children-are-anxious-podcast-episode/

Susan talks with her long-time assistant, Amy, about the transformations they have witnessed in countless families through years of offering parent education. https://susanstiffelman.com/stiffelman-knobler-podcast-episode/

A child's ability to stay regulated and manage impulses is closely tied to sleep, but try as they may to get their kids to bed, many parents face bedtime struggles night in and night out. In this great conversation, Susan talks with Heather Turgeon, MFT about the why's and how's of good sleep practices. https://susanstiffelman.com/heather-turgeon-podcast-episode/

In this episode, Susan talks about why it can be hard for children to open up when they're having a hard time, and how we can address our own concerns to make sure they know it's safe to come to us when they're hurting. https://susanstiffelman.com/when-kids-say-im-fine-but-theyre-not/

Martha and Susan discuss steps we can take to ensure our lives—including our parenting lives—are in integrity with our truest nature. An inspiring conversation about making small but significant changes to experience greater peace and joy every day. https://susanstiffelman.com/martha-beck-podcast-episode/

Dr. Mona Delahooke joins Susan for an absorbing conversation about how to shift from simply managing a child's difficult behavior to supporting their nervous system when they move toward dysregulation. Great information about the role of the brain and co-regulation in helping children cope with sensory overwhelm, frustration, and disappointment. https://susanstiffelman.com/podcast-episode-mona-delahooke/

This is a double-whammy of an episode, with words of wisdom about the power of our unique voices AND a performance of one of Susan's favorite songs by The Brothers Koren: Abraham. An extra special treat you won't want to miss! https://susanstiffelman.com/podcast-episode-brothers-koren/

In this episode, Susan talks with Elaine Halligan about her personal journey of raising a neuro-atypical child. Elaine talks about maintaining a strong and loving relationship with your child, even through the challenges of identifying what might be fueling chronic misbehavior. https://susanstiffelman.com/podcast-episode-elaine-halligan/

In this episode, Susan talks with Dr. Rita Eichenstein about the neurological and neurochemical changes that occur in the brain when adults become parents -- and how this understanding can enhance attachment and reduce parental stress! https://susanstiffelman.com/rita-eichenstein-podcast-episode/

In this episode, Susan talks with Dr. Ned Hallowell about the stigma of the label of ADHD, and ways to reframe ADHD as a gift and trait, rather than a disorder or deficit. They also share how ADHD has impacted their own lives in positive ways. https://susanstiffelman.com/podcast-episode-ned-hallowell/

In this episode, Susan talks with Debbie Reber about the habits and socialization that make it hard for us to take time to rest. If you have a hard time honoring your need to slow down or if you worry about disappointing others by saying “No”, you'll hear some great suggestions in this conversation. https://susanstiffelman.com/debbie-reber-rest-podcast-episode/

In this conversation, Jessica Lahey shares vital information about how to raise kids to understand what early substance use does to their developing brain, sharing practical tips for delaying experimentation while addressing curiosity and peer pressure. https://susanstiffelman.com/podcast-episode-jessica-lahey/