The Sharp Gentleman: Style | Relationships | Dating | Confidence | Entrepreneurship

Disclaimer: this episode contains opinions that are mine and may be offensive to others. While I do not care if a topic or opinion offends you (see here), I want to extend the courtesy of letting you know this may trigger you if you're afraid of hearing strong ideas about fitness, motivation, and complacency. Before I got married, I made a commitment to fitness. It was actually a perfect time to do it. I started at the new year and ended half way through May when Jami and I went to Italy to get hitched. I cut 27 pounds, lots of inches, and body fat. It was awesome. When we returned, she got back on track (she's a fitness trainer / instructor / coach), and I did... sort of. I kept working out, but I wasn't really paying attention to my diet anymore, and my work (desk job at a computer) caused my posture to ruin my range of motion with forward shoulders and all that goes with it. Fast forward a couple of years, and shoulder impingement causes me too much pain to work out. So I stopped. That was about 2 years ago. Sure, I'd run a bit and bike for 30 minutes on Thursdays, but it was just enough not to feel bad. Then my pants stopped fitting well. I found my custom made-to-measure shirts were too tight to button. I realized I have a full spare tire in the middle. I continued to make excuses and justify that I was not fit, but I was working hard and making great money, so my value was not to be questioned. How many guys out there share this sentiment? The one thing I did start doing in the last few months was shoulder rehab and posture exercises. HUGE improvement. I wasn't ready to really jump back into the gym though. Then a fitness friend of mine posted a meme online. Suddenly, my comfort zone became uncomfortable. In this episode, I'm going to explain why your comfort zone is making you fat, why it made me fat, and how "fat" doesn't have to mean physical appearance - It's bigger than that. Prepare yourselves. Take a listen and let me know what you think in the comments below.

I know I've touched on the role and importance of happiness before, but this time I'm kicking it up a notch with science to explore the truth about happiness. Not to be confused with it's apathetic cousin, contentment, happiness is about finding joy in the everyday, and letting it permeate into the tasks, trials, and takeaways of your everyday life. On this episode, I'm joined by Jim McCarthy. He's a TEDx speaker and # 1 bestselling author of Live Each Day: A Surprisingly Simple Guide to Happiness. He teaches people how to create their happiness by blending mindfulness techniques and timeless wisdom with simple, science-based practices. Jim is recognized for his unique perspective as a Stanford MBA, internet pioneer, and person living with a cancer diagnosis. He has presented his innovative and acclaimed “Happiness Keynote” to organizations of all sizes across the U.S. and internationally. Audiences take away practical strategies, evidence-based insights, and daily action plans — because happiness is a skill you can develop. This episode covers the truth about happiness and simple math you can't ignore. Once we open your mind to the 1%, you'll never be the same. No excuses. It's a big deal. Take a listen and let me know what you think in the comments below.

The real estate market these days seems like a combination of fire and ice. As still as that sounds, some buyers and sellers are experiencing properties and transactions that are red hot deals, while others are getting iced with poor maintenance, missed opportunities, and bad decisions. So what does one look for when buying or selling a home? More importantly, what do you look for when buying or selling your first home? It seems like such an easy thing when you see if on television, and "anybody can make millions" when pitched to you at a seminar, but what should you know and do walking into a sale? In this episode, I'm joined by my good friend Stacy Massar of Massar Group Realty here in DFW, and she's going to help shed some light on what you need to watch out for when buying, selling, or qualifying for a home. She'll also let you in on some insider information about new construction and possible pitfalls to avoid. Take a listen and let me know what you think in the comments below.

In the last year, opportunity has shown up in a bunch of different spaces in my life. From relationships, friendships, travel, technology, and especially business ventures, it feels like opportunities are everywhere and I'd have to actively work to avoid them. It's a good feeling. But it's not like I didn't do some adjusting to get here. This is a combination of focus and preparation. Speaking with a friend of mine, I heard the tell tale sign of someone blind to opportunities: "I wish I was as lucky as you are. You're surrounded by opportunities, and I don't have anything coming my way." This opened the door to what it really means to recognize opportunities everywhere. It feels like a lot of people only recognize the best of the best when they land on their laps unannounced. Everything beyond that is either discounted for not being a good option –not worth pursuing– or it's just plain missed. There  are three factors that influence the opportunities around you: Your perspective (the lens through which you view the world) Your clarity of focus (are you clear on exactly what you want) Your environment (you might have to leave that one horse town to find more horses) On this episode, I'm going to give you a few reasons why you might be the only thing holding yourself back (as cliché as that sounds), what steps you can take to gain clarity and recognize opportunities around you, and why your perspective on luck has everything to do with both. This is more than just opening up your eyes – it's about the damn story in your head. Take a listen and let me know what you think in the comments below. [Subscribe Here]

When you're setting yourself up for success, you're probably aware (of have heard repeatedly) that the people you surround yourself with everyday have a direct impact on your trajectory. The right people can help you feel powerful, tackle problems with critical thinking, and help you view the world from a perspective that enables you to be and do your absolute best. What you probably didn't think about, however, is the impact your personal physical space also has on your success trajectory. Trying to feel like a boss, ready to go out and conquer your goals can prove difficult if your home or apartment feels drab or immature. Sure, poor living conditions make for great motivators in movies, but let's be honest – for the average man, rising above is not actually a skill many possess. We want to feel powerful and we want certain material things to help us with that. So how do you upgrade your bachelor pad or living space so it's more inline with the man you're meant to be? In this episode, I'm joined by Misty Maxey of Misty Maxey Designs. She's The bachelor pad designer and she has some great insights and advice on how you can upgrade your space while still being true to who you are. Not all interior designers want a million throw pillows and weird things on the wall. Misty is here to give you easy and actionable advice and 5 ways you can upgrade your bachelor pad (or married pad, or office space, or wherever really). 

Man, that title just hits you in the face, doesn't it? It is unapologetically raw and maybe even rude. Hell, some people might even say it's offensive to be so crass. This is such a perfect topic to talk about – especially in today's divisive and politically charged, social-media fueled, attention seeking society. Nobody cares if you're offended. Let's explore this with some context. If you've ever been on the internet (well, beyond this site), you may have had the unfortunate experience of wandering into the comment section on a news article. Be advised – don't wander into any comment section like this. Ever. They have nothing of value to add. Save yourself. In this episode, we're going to hit some of you with the hard truth that your opinion doesn't matter. You might get your feelings hurt, but it's for your own good. Let's talk about why nobody cares if you're offended, and what you can do about it.

Did you know one of the most often searched terms is “how to find balance as an entrepreneur and family man” on Google? Why is that? Well, it's probably because having a work life balance as an entrepreneur is hard as hell. While many people may look at successful entrepreneurs and feel they “have it together” based on their viewpoint, sometimes that's the furthest thing from the truth. As an entrepreneur, priorities and schedules, and investments and expenses are different than others' that work in Corporate America. The idea that the struggle is real is more than just a clever meme. Today's episode is a special one because I'm joined by my good friend Kostas Lazanas, a restaurant owner, a husband, a father, a community member, and a man who's done more before turning 30 than so many of us. We're talking about finding balance between work and home and events and vacations and, more importantly, what keeps you from losing your mind through it all.

There are so many messages of manliness out there in the world these days, all vying for more and more of your attention, but which ones are true? Which messages are good for you, and which are good for everyone? There's a big difference there. Some influencers will have men believe that the world is getting softer and that men need to focus more on being manly, growing beards, and getting tough. Some are focused on being the best version of yourself so you can have a more authentic impact on the world around you. My personal perspective is that the world is becoming more WIIFM every day. WIIFM, if you're not familiar is "What's In It For Me" – and it's killing the vibe in everything. We are demolishing nature so we can be rich. We're poisoning our bodies so we can be thinner. We're naming our kids absolutely asinine things because we think it's cool. We don't help our fellow man unless there's some upside to it for us, but we all get the "feels" when we watch an inspirational clip on Facebook about someone helping out someone else. We don't treat each other with respect or even courtesy anymore unless there's something in it for us. So what's the deal? What's the state of today's man? To answer that question, I've had other guests on the show, and I've been talking to guys all over the country to discover a little more of their perspective. Today, however, I have a treat. In this episode, I'm joined by Rob Kandell, speaker, author, coach, and innovator in communication. Rob has been helping men find themselves for sixteen years. An expert in interpersonal communication and relationships, he has helped thousands of students find a more balanced, energized life with better relationships, more sex (he's the co-founder of OneTaste, a practice or Orgasmic Meditation), and more happiness. He is the host of the highly successful podcast, Tuff Love, and the author of the upcoming book, unHIDDEN, A Book for Men and Those Confused by Them. We're talking about the state of today's man. What does he have going for him? What is he up against? What can he do to improve without being seen as less of a man? Often, it's not what you're doing wrong that counts, it's what's you're doing right. Rob and I dig into what that is and come out on the other side. Take a listen and let me know what you think in the comments below. [Subscribe Here]

Sometimes the hustle can bring great success and confidence, and other times the hustle brings exhaustion, despair, and defeat. So what's the catch with hustle? In this episode of the podcast, we're exploring the tale of two entrepreneurs and the differences between a hustle that works and a hustle that hurts. No, it may not cause physical harm, but a hustle that doesn't work is every bit as exhausting and fruitless as trying to ride a bicycle through wet cement. Let's fix that and get you on your way. You do NOT need to grind in order to be successful. You just need to recalibrate your hustle. Take a listen and let me know what you think in the comments below.

I recently had a conversation with a client of mine regarding what he truly wants. He had so many things to say about what he wanted. And, he had even more to say about why it's too hard or impossible to make happen. There are all these "reasons" for how it just can't be done, or it's too scary, or what will happen if it doesn't work out – and every last one of them is made up. In too many cases, we are seeking permission to take the leap and go for it. We're looking for the validation that our decisions are good ones, and we should pursue them. For this client, he needed someone he respected to tell him that what he truly wanted was worthy and give him permission to go out and get it. But more importantly, he needed someone to get him to cross a line. He needed a push to be bold and decide. We're all dealing with a myriad of lines we're afraid to cross. Taking the big leap of faith to start your new business venture, or having the courage to make that pretty girl your wife, or investing in yourself after years of investing in everyone else – these are lines we've drawn and need help, encouragement, and a good push to cross. In today's episode, we'll explore the power and pitfalls of crossing lines. We're also going to jump into the debate of whether it's better to beg for forgiveness or ask for permission. In some cases, one is a slippery slope to disaster. In others, it is the only way to go.

Gentlemen, having a crap credit score is not only an ungentlemanly thing to have, but it's also completely fixable. There are resources, tricks, and actions you can take to completely change your score, so today, we're going over the definitive guide to improving your credit score, and keeping it that way. The first thing to understand about credit health and your score, is that it isn't something that mysteriously appeared at no fault of your own doing. It takes a while to ruin credit, and it subsequently takes a while to bring it back into the high numbers. Well, usually if you do it yourself. If you have a team of credit experts to help, you can make ridiculously significant improvements in just a couple of months. More on that in a minute. Whether you're looking to raise your score to make a big purchase (home, car, boat, etc.), or you've seen the power of good credit in other people's purchases and you want it for yourself, your biggest obstacle may not be what you think. In today's episode, I'll share my credit catastrophe, explain the basics of credit, the laws that are actually on YOUR side, and the secrets to getting your scores, your reports, and your life on a whole new level. This is, after all, the definitive guide to improving your credit score and keeping it that way. At the end, I have a special deal for you that might just be the jump-start you need to finally get your credit cleaned up and corrected.

My wife and I are a good example of opposites attracting. I'm a hopeless romantic and she's much more practical. I'll plan grand gestures of romance, cloaked in secrecy for surprise, and deliver a symphony of Kodak moments we'll cherish forever. It's all orchestrated for my own satisfaction. I do it because it's fun for me. Yes, of course, she enjoys the romance, but grand gestures aren't really that important to her. So I do it for me. This exact truth got me thinking about all of you guys. Do you know what your significant other wants? I mean, truly wants...  Not what kind of jewelry she wants, or whether chocolate is better than flowers. No, I'm talking about what makes her feel the most appreciated, most valued, most heard, most loved – her love language. Look, you can keep up the charade and buy flowers and chocolates for Valentine's day, or you can hear me out and take your relationship to another level. This episode is dedicated to deepening your relationship by exploring her love language, your love language, and the ridiculously powerful impact it will have in your life. Ready to step up your love game? Take a listen and let me know what you think in the comments below. [Subscribe Here]

In this episode, we're exploring the relationships that are affected when you become a man of your own. It is an episode for sons, and daughter-in-laws, and even my own parents and in-laws. There's a space for guys to recognize the auxiliary players in their transition from boys to men. We forget that the world doesn't revolve around us. We forget there are those that came before us, and we forgo wisdom for independence all too often.

One of the things that we all strive to be is dependable as men. We want to be strong providers and trusted unconditionally. We want to be honorable men, even if many of us aren't exactly sure what that means. We like, and often romanticize the Gentleman's Agreement. When we are told something is going to happen, we want to believe it. We like the idea that "he's a man of his word," and "he's a good man, he'll come through." You want to be "a man of your word," but how do you get there? What makes one a man of his word and how do you become a dependable man of your word? In this episode of the podcast, we're exploring commitments, choices, and an amazing concept of being and doing "because I said I would."

In a year from now, you'll wish you started today. When I want to have the best year ever, I look at this quote. This is one of my favorite quotes because it keeps me focused on what I'm committing to when I procrastinate. Every time I say no to getting up and getting out there, I'm saying yes to missed opportunities; yes to broken promises to myself; yes to feeling overwhelmed later when I feel like I haven't gotten anything done; yes to excuses – the list goes on.  When I say yes to those things, I'm also saying no to success; no to opportunity; no to connections; and no to myself. In a year from now, you bet your ass I will wish I had started today. Throughout my years coaching clients all over the world, the one constant among them is the dreaded new year's resolution. It's something we all seem to make and more often than not, all seem to bomb. What typically stands in the way of committing to it an following through is a lack of clarity. Sure, you may know what you want to be, do, or have in the new year, but are you also aware of the habits you need to create to make it happen? Do you know what you need to leave behind to move forward successfully? In this episode, I'll introduce you to 10 questions to help you "complete" this year, and prepare you for the new one. I'll guide you through each step, and you'll come out on the other side with a better idea of what you really can really do to have the best year ever.

Integrity Through Distractions Temptation is everywhere, gentlemen. You can be driving to the gym, ready to hit it hard, and find yourself in the Dunkin' Donuts drive thru a moment later... if you give into the temptation. Integrity through distractions, right?  Distractions are even more prevalent. Distractions are temptations disguised as noise. You may not feel that temptation is the right word, but when you see the Facebook notifications on your phone, it's difficult to resist the temptation to pause what you're doing and check them, right? On a bigger level, having the discipline to stay focused through distractions is what so many men struggle with - especially young men. Guys in their early 20s are developing their goals and aspirations for life, while also discovering what their integrity is all about. I was recently asked by a younger gentleman about managing the expectations of others while trying to stay responsible, accountable, and keep his integrity. In this episode, we're going to talk about integrity, responsibility, and what you can do to stay focused while surrounded by distractions.

THIS EPISODE HAS CURSE WORDS. I went to an event yesterday and heard Tony Robbins speak. One of the exercises he had us do was to meditate on a moment we are forever grateful for, and I thought of the time my dad visited me and Jami in Texas, and I taught him how to tie a bow tie. Coincidentally, we just passed the anniversary of his death, and a young man for whom I am a mentor just lost his father to the same deadly, unexpected heart attack. He is processing, and I am helping any way I can. I thought it was a good time to revisit this story and tell it on an episode so you can hear the impact. Losing someone close to you is an incredible pain. But losing a parent is worse. I can't even imagine what it must feel like losing a child. This is my story of losing my dad. I hope that it helps you as just rereading it has helped me

This time, Ego IS the answer. For many of us, happiness and contentment are synonymous. We reach a moderate level of success, while secretly wishing we could do (fill-in the blank). Most of the time, that one thing we wish were doing professionally –instead of what we're currently doing– is in a completely unrelated field. It is our fear of switching gears and venturing out into the unknown that keeps us in our safe place –our regular job, regular pay, regular, predictable life. Until one day, someone enters our social circle and is doing exactly the thing we secretly wish we were doing. This moment, for men all over the world, is a catalyst to creation. In an instant, ego dances with doubt, ideas break bread with creativity, and pride tells us we can do better than this guy, while our saboteur tries to talk us out of it. This moment is paramount to success and fulfillment for many of us. We need someone to show up and burst our bubble. We need a competitor to challenge us. We need to see that we're actually a rather small fish, and this pond is bigger than we thought. This doesn't have to be about a career or professional position either. It happens in fitness levels all the time. You were the fittest, most bad-ass of your group of friends... that was until the new guy showed up with muscles a little bigger than yours, and a six pack that makes you look like a fatty. You have to step up. You can do better. You know it. In this episode, we're exploring the reasons why you need challengers in your life. Whether it's for personal or professional fulfillment, you need someone (or multiple people) to burst your bubble and make you take action.

Haste makes waste, gentlemen. In today's modern society of what I like to call Throwaway Ideals, it can be difficult to see yourself finishing anything all the way. Most of us are too easily conditioned to cut and run when the going gets tough because there's opportunity and alternatives abound. We start a lot of projects, chase a lot of ideas, and break ground on new endeavors... but we rush through the motions so quickly that we often miss details, and cause things to derail. More importantly, when things derail we jump ship and start something new. It's like building a wooden boat. We begin applying the wooden slats to the hull, nailing them into the frame, and increasing our pace. We get excited at the prospect of soon sailing our new boat, that we begin cutting corners, skipping nails, and forgetting small details. Some of us will quit building about halfway through because a step we missed (skipped) in the beginning, needs to be completed, which means we have to backtrack and start over. No good. The others that get the boat in the water immediately notice the skipped steps when she starts to take on water. The effort to rescue and rebuild can seem too much, so we let her sink and start a new project.

“What's a gentleman like you doing in a place like this?” Las Vegas is dubbed as “Sin City,” and with good reason, as it offers just about every kind of earthly delight under the sun. As such, it might seem a contradiction to recommend this place to bona fide gentlemen. Nonetheless, there are actually a lot of activities that gents can try out, without succumbing to a truly hedonistic lifestyle, and burning a hole through their wallet. In this article and episode, we'll explore where to eat, where to stay, what to wear, and where to play.

There is often a misconception when it comes to bringing alcohol to different social gatherings. What's the best drink to bring to a party? Should bring anything at all? Beer or wine? Both? Food as well? It's all a lot to keep balanced! You definitely want to bring a gift to the host of whatever social gathering you're attending, and this episode will detail what gift AND what else you want to do when you attend!

The world is an interesting place – one full of opportunities and adventures, yet also riddled with terrible decisions, fear, doubt, and distractions that keep us from becoming the best men we can be. Sometimes it takes a hard truth to snap us out of our funk and get us back on track. These hard truths can be difficult to digest, but necessary to keep you from wearing those jeans you cut into shorts. Seriously, throw those things away. The impetus for a hard truth is never born from malice; rather, it's delivered to guide you back toward your goal of being the best version of yourself. If someone is spouting off hard truths at you and it feels like he's being a dick, he probably is. If, however, he's telling you things you don't want to hear but you're inspired by it, congratulations! You just received a heaping scoop of hard truth. This episode is a scoop of tough love. Take it and enjoy.

Breaking up is hard to do. At the same time, staying in a relationship that doesn't serve either party is also hard to do. Unfortunately, we are willing to do more of the latter that we are of the former, and that's a disservice to ourselves and each other. Look, it sucks to break up, but it also sucks to be in an unhappy relationship. A fair amount of my clients (and emails I receive) ask what they should do to exit their unfulfilling relationships. They've read other posts and episodes about listening and building better partnerships with their significant other, but the issues aren't meant to be improved – they're signs the relationship isn't meant to continue any longer. When you get that gut feeling that, "oh man, this is over –we have to break up," there are a few things you must do in order to keep a level head and move forward. This episode is a double whammy because I'm discussing the signs you know the relationship is over, and what you need to do next to get you through it.

We've all heard, in some form or another, the old adage that "you have to hit rock bottom before you can truly change." In the case of my friend Jan, his rock bottom was a nervous breakdown due to the compounding stress of being an employee, a student, and a man in his 20s trying to figure things out. It turns out, some men aren't built to be employees, while others aren't built to be entrepreneurs. When you're the latter, you see the risks, the uncertainty, and the stress as too much to handle and you'd rather work and build your future under a company's umbrella. When you're the former, you see all those risks, uncertainty, and stress as a welcome opportunity to build something YOU can control. Being at the mercy of a corporation is too risky for the entrepreneur, while being at the mercy of your own limiting beliefs and fears, is too risky for the employee. In this episode of The Sharp Gentleman Podcast, I'm joined by my friend Jan Koch, founder and creative mind behind Little Oak, a company of exquisite wooden watches, and we're discussing what it's like building a business after a breakdown. There's an ugly side to being an entrepreneur at heart, and sometimes it rears its head at the least opportune time.

Look, we all want a way to make more while doing less, right? Passive income is the vehicle to allow that, BUT –and this is a big one– they aren't going to make you rich overnight, and they all come with their own shortcomings. In this episode (and article), I'm going to cover the 5 main channels for passive income and what you need to know going in. I'm also going to share what I've done and what I currently do to make passive revenue each month. It goes without saying (even though I'm saying it now) that some of the links here are affiliate links and I will make a small amount of commission should you choose to use them and purchase something. We're pulling back the curtain, right? Let's do this. Take a listen and let me know what you think in the comments below. [Subscribe Here]

I was recently having a conversation with a group of friends and business connections and mentioned a little bit of my story after my accident, and was met with "what accident?" in response. It turns out, many of my connections don't know my story. The short version is: I was in a terrible car wreck just after high school and it changed my brain. Pretty crazy, right? In this episode, I will tell the story of the day I was hit by a bus. I'll take you through the events as I remember (and as I was informed of afterward) so you can get a flavor for it. But, because I can't simply tell a story without a lesson, I want to make sure I round out the story with a question on legacy. Look, we all think we carry a certain weight or value with others – they would miss us if we died, right? Well, what would your legacy truly be if you died tomorrow? That's what I want to challenge you to explore after my story.  So get ready. Take a listen and don't forget to subscribe! [Subscribe Here]

Many of us are lucky we never had to/have to transition through a life-altering accident, illness, or injury to emerge with a much greater amount of clarity, conviction, and confidence. In this instance, Suzy went through a pretty wicked stroke and emerged with a new perspective on 'listening to your gut' – and some insights that will help us all avoid making the same mistakes she did. In this episode, I interview Suzy Wigstadt of Stroke to Success and she reveals her story of suffering a hemiplegic migraine that turned out to be a stroke, and waking up with the mind of newborn. She tells us about her recovery, her perspective, and her realization that it was time to start listening to her gut. Suzy is an amazing woman with an incredible story of overcoming and conquering, and it's an honor to have her on the podcast. Take a listen and don't forget to subscribe!

On a random day a few weeks ago, I was perusing Instagram and stumbled across a brand called Make Today Legendary. They sent me a message about their cause and what their wristband was all about. Skeptical at first, I have to admit I grilled the founder with some follow-up questions. After discovering more about him and the movement behind MTL, I invited him onto the podcast so we could introduce the mission to all of you. It's an excellent interview, and I definitely advise you to order some bands of your own after you listen! [Subscribe Here] Order your Make Today Legendary™ wristband today!

As we grow into management and leadership roles, we are often taught how to lead from the wrong people. More often than not, we learn to lead by seeing the world through the lens of the leader immediately above us. This isn't necessarily bad, but it can often have us attached to outcomes, directions, and processes that aren't really our own. The question I invite you to chew on in that situation is this: Is it really your point of view if you were given the lens from someone else, and it's already pointed where they were looking? I'm a personal fan of Stoicism, and the avatars of the philosophy: Marcus Aurelius, Epictetus, and Seneca. They demonstrated the tenets of great leadership by practicing control and mindfulness – essentially taking command of the things you can control and ditching everything else. In this episode, I want to introduce you to the principles of stoicism with a little history, and show you how it can elevate your leadership and legacy. Take a listen and let me know what you think in the comments below.

Dating has progressed from meeting people in public places and having conversation to swiping left or right and texting for hookups. Does it mean all hope for a real relationship is lost? I argue that no, all hope is not lost, but you must be aware of the rules of the game so you don't fall victim to it. This goes for men and women. In this episode, I'm going to cover the 10 commandments of dating for the Modern Gent. They're not difficult, but they almost certainly end in disaster if not followed. Everything from who to where, to when, and why is listed, so let's get started.

Men are programmed to conquer things. We come with software already installed from the factory that has us compelled to solve things, right wrongs, and stand and fight. It's what makes us such great linear thinkers! We see a problem, we focus on the next steps, we take them, and we conquer. Piece of cake. Unfortunately, in our male-pattern-thinking, we completely miss the perspectives and emotions of those around us, and how our actions impact them. To call us stubborn and bullheaded is such an easy thing to do when we are in our default mode of "get it done." We don't see the problem with solving the problem... so what's the problem? Today's episode is about the Hero inside all men and why being a hero makes you an idiot. I'm going to introduce you to your hero, your victim, and your villain so you understand what kind of movie your life really is these days.

The one thing none of us focus on when think think about what we'll be when we grow up, is how we'll look. Maybe that's a good thing. Most Americans simply grow up and get wider, not taller as they age. I'm actually in better shape today than I ever was in high school, but I fell victim to something much more sinister. In honor of keeping things fresh and not-too-grown-up, let's take a minute to talk about something very adult: male pattern baldness. In this episode, I want to entertain you with the grand story of my journey into and through baldness prevention, care, and acceptance. More importantly, I want to share what it's like to be a 24 year old in a $3000 hairpiece. So have a seat, relax, and let's "comb through this" together. [pun intended]

This episode was recorded with lavalier microphones worn on our lapels at SyncLab Media Studios in Dallas, which was both amazing and left me wishing the sound was a better. To help make sure nothing is missed, I took the time to transcribe everything form out 20 minute interview below. There's also a video (it is a video studio after all) of the interview with bonus footage and some extras, but it is reserved for the members of The Gentleman's Inner Circle. If you're looking to take your personal development as a man to the next level, I highly recommend you join me today. For a very limited time, membership is significantly discounted. Join today! In this episode, we'll cover The Gentleman Warrior, and the a few of the nine mantras that go into making your life the best it's ever been. 

Have you ever been minding your own business when suddenly a perfume or cologne wafts through the air and completely captures your attention? Maybe it was a scent that reminded you of that old girlfriend you had back in college. Maybe it reminded you of that guy at the office that smells like he bathes himself in cologne before coming to work every morning. Whatever it is, smell is one of the most powerful senses when it comes to triggering old memories and creating new ones. Make sure you're making the right impression with your scent, gentlemen. Here are FIVE tips to help make sure you know the Right Way to Wear Cologne.

Today, I am on location with my good friend Aimee Bentson. You may remember her from the episode where we discussed the Dos and Don'ts of Online Dating. It was a hit episode, and I thought it would be a good idea to get her take on the modern gent these days. So today, we are going to cover 5 ways you can become a modern gent – more importantly, a version that is authentic to who you already are. We can all look like modern gentlemen, but some of us don't naturally want to wear a suit and tie... It's about being shamelessly authentic in your style, attitude, and confidence. Let's get on with the show! A quick note about the audio: We picked up some echo from our location, but I tried to clean up as much as possible. Please enjoy! When becoming a modern gent, there are 5 huge things you can do to improve yourself and take your presence to the next level. They're all simple but effective. Remember, it's not about completely reinventing yourself overnight; rather, it's about making subtle changes and shifts to evolve into the best version of yourself a little each day.  

In a world full of phobias, public speaking is up there at the top – right next to that spider at the end of Arachnophobia. And yet, men and women both dream about absolutely dominating the room with the perfect toast. Many secretly dream of raising a glass and speaking off-the-cuff with such prose that the ladies swoon and someone starts a slow-clap. It may not go quite as dramatically, but there's actually a good formula for making sure your toast is remembered for the right reasons, and not because you embarrassed yourself or someone else. Here are 7 keys to help you speak in front of a crowd... especially when you are tasked to give the perfect toast.

With New Year's Resolutions in full swing, I know a lot of us, myself included, can often feel like we're not going to make it happen. We're simply not strong enough to keep up with the willpower necessary to make that big change. We feel stuck... even nine days into the new year. Sometimes it just takes a few quick things to turn it around for me - the same can be true for you. More often than not, you just need a little perspective reminder of where you are, and how much you've actually done. More importantly, it is an opportunity to be authentic, and notice all the roles you play, the things you do, and who you are in your life. Gentlemen, this is paramount for you because you often take on more than your fair share (you're the hero, right) and you discount your actions. Whenever you feel like all your efforts are not making enough change happen, or not happen fast enough, take a few moments to pause. That pause will help you get it together before you decide to throw in the towel. In today's episode, I'll walk you through five secrets to restoring your momentum when you're stuck. Hopefully they help you get back in gear and back on track. It's never too late to get focused and few things are actually lost causes.

Why would you want to know how to fight with your spouse? Because it's a natural part of building a healthy, long-lasting relationship. Marriage in America has become something of a joke. Well, not really a joke – more of a statistical mess. Approximately half of all marriages in the US end in divorce. Clearly, we take commitment very seriously. There are many reasons marriages end, including: adultery (I wanted my cake...and some other cakes too) finances (I wanted more cake, but we always fought over our cake budget) life goals (She wanted lots of little cakes running around, but I hate cakes) sex goals (I like to eat cake and she can't stand it) and so many more... As a relationship coach, I notice communication between people a lot more critically than most. I listen to the words, the tone, and the body language couples use when speaking and/or arguing, and there are several tell-tale signs that a relationship is doomed. Rather than bring you down with all the reasons marriages fail, let's explore how to fight with your spouse without ruining your marriage.

Public Speaking for the Anxious Guy with Julian Placino The Pathways to Success Podcast is a weekly a show where Julian interviews leaders on business, personal development, health & fitness and many other topics designed to help you find your unique Pathway to Success. Although there are principles and commonalities of success, everyone has to walk their own path and craft their own story. How you define success might not be how someone else does. That's why he invites a highly varied group of experts who have succeeded in many different avenues. On the show, he's interviewed CEOs, millionaires, high-level entrepreneurs, bestselling authors, dynamic thoughts leaders, transformation experts and elite level athletes. In this podcast, we're talking about public speaking and making great first and lasting impressions, even as an introvert. We'll dissect three keys to boosting your speaking acumen, and building the confidence you need to have an impact.

Some lessons just need to be forgotten... It never ceases to amaze me how brilliant people can opt not to pursue their big ideas because old lessons they've learned are so deeply ingrained. What a tragedy it is to watch someone give up before he or she even begins. Some poor lessons we learned as early as childhood can still haunt us today. Even in my own business and personal life, I wrestle against lessons I have gleaned from past experience, my parents, friends, teachers, and the media. It's made me realize that more often than not, the biggest obstacle to you having the life or business or love –or whatever– you want actually lives between your ears. That space where your mind is... yeah, that's where old, outdated, frivolous lessons are making rules you're afraid to break. And you are suffering for it. Whether you want to launch a business, chase an idea, fall in love, take a risk, or stand up and declare you're worth more than whatever is keeping you stuck, there are lessons you need to unlearn. In this podcast, I want to introduce you to 7 lessons you need to unlearn right now to start creating the life you want.  I offer this disclaimer though: you may feel some resistance when trying to unlearn these. Push through it. You will be better for it, I promise.

I was recently having a conversation with a friend of mine about entrepreneurship and the changing landscape of business success these days, and I discovered a few coaching moments I want to share with you. He's an incredibly hard working guy and it shows in his business and brand. He is the first one in and last one out of the office seven days a week. He's created a culture of innovation, creativity, and hard work in his company. And he's completely overwhelmed. Success in small businesses comes in waves. The tide rolls out and you're left with a dry shoreline which makes it even harder to keep your ship afloat. Some days you feel like throwing in the towel, right? Then a big wave comes in and signals a rising tide. Everything rises, you switch gears and it all begins to fall into place. Prosperity again! The cycle continues indefinitely. Too many entrepreneurs fail because they grow exhausted of the cycle and the overwhelm. Taking a few pages from the hundreds of books in my library, I want to share five keys to reducing your overwhelm and improving your success. Essentially, in this podcast I want to show you how to start a business that doesn't fail – or change your current business situation so it stops failing.

Control can kill. Gentlemen, this may sound counter-intuitive, but you need to stop being charge of everything in your life – If for no other reason than it's killing you. If it doesn't end up physically killing you, it will at the very least kill a metric ton of pleasure, enjoyment, and realized success. Sure, you may reach that goal you're shooting for, and do it your way, but you'll be too exhausted to recognize and appreciate the fruits of your labor. Control can kill. What do you do about it? Look, I'm a professional control freak. I've been in recovery for about 3 years now, but I still have episodes when I get my hands in everything and do it all myself. I take control and get stuff done (that's the good part), but I suffer for it later (that's the inevitable pitfall). In this podcast / article, we'll explore four big reasons why control can kill, and four ways to cope and adjust so you keep moving toward your goal, whatever it happens to be.

Don Miguel Ruiz wrote The Four Agreements, and I'm sure you've no doubt read quotes from it and learned of these agreements from one source or another. Whether you read the book or not, I want to address each agreement from the gentleman's perspective, and a few extra pieces that can help really bring it home in a big way. The basic four agreements are: Be impeccable with your word Don't take anything personally Don't make assumptions Always do your very best These are each sound pieces of advice on their own, but combined they lay the foundation for a man to be above the gossip and drama, but not above anyone – to be one that others look up to, while never looking down on them. Because this is such a powerful (and simple) exercise in making you better, I invite you into this crash course I affectionately call, "a gentleman's guide to the Four Agreements." In this podcast, I'll take you through the agreements, how and where you can apply them in your quest to be the man you were born to be, and explore examples of how they can impact your life.

There are a myriad of outlets describing how to build your legacy these days, and yet we don't really care much for it until we start noticing our impact on the world. Sometimes that means our children, sometimes it means our coworkers, sometimes it's just our sudden realization that we're going to die someday and we worry how we'll be remembered. Whatever the catalyst, legacy becomes a buzz word for most men in their 30s, and only amplifies as the years pass. The definition of legacy, however, is flawed. It is often referred to as what is left when someone dies. Now, Merriam-Webster defines it as something that is handed down or doled out in a person's will upon his or her passing – not necessarily incorrect, but its definition has certainly changed over the years. Legacy is most often referred to nowadays as the personal story, attitude, impact, and influence left when someone passes. Let's take it a step further and modify this definition so it's not only more impactful, but more actionable for you in this moment. Take a listen:

One of the most misused superpowers a man can have is the power to listen deeply. Millions of self-proclaimed "good listeners" are actually just listening well enough to keep a conversation going in his or her direction. Genuine listeners hear what isn't being said, connect more deeply with their partner, and create a pathway for creative collaboration and power. This is incredibly important for any man trying to better himself and the world around him. Gentlemen, this is you (at least it should be). When you learn to genuinely listen at a deeper and more active level, you touch a place in those you communicate with and it allows doors to open to more – more feelings, more opportunities, more connections, and more fulfillment. In this podcast, I'll introduce you to the different levels of listening and give you examples in each of them so you get a better understand of each and how you can move into deeper, more active levels immediately.  Take a listen:

Today, we're talking about the 5 rules for getting fit for the rest of your life. These aren't necessarily the perfect food, nutrition plan, supplement, or exercise; rather, they're the 5 rules you need to follow if you want to achieve actual longterm success on your fitness journey. Oscar and I were never huge or morbidly obese guys, but we both grew up with extra pudge. We also (especially me) noticed that we were working on quite an excellent Dad-Bod physique. This is no bueno. I'm not a dad, and I work very hard to prevent Dad Jeans in my client styling, so I shouldn't be skipping out on the fitness aspect and nurturing a Dad-Bod, right? Exactly.  We explore our journeys to better fitness, our workouts, our nutrition, or motivation, and what keeps us on track to continue improving. You don't want to miss these 5 rules for getting in shape.  Take a listen:

Today's podcast is about something you're all familiar with, but may not know exactly what the rules are in it: tipping. Gratuity – when should you, how much should you, what makes a good tip, why should you, etc. These questions roll around the heads of many men every day, and we're here to talk about what the rules are, and what to be aware of in the tipping world. This is also a special show because I'm introducing my friend, and potential future podcast cohost, Oscar Guerrero to all of you. He's a stand up guy that has his own story of struggling to make sense of the world and how, after an anxiety attack in front of his CEO, he literally "got a grip" and started working to make himself and the people around him...better. Today's show is about knowing the right time and amount to tip, but more importantly, it's about why you should be a good tipper in the first place.

I have an amazing show for you today. [remember to Subscribe Here] I'm joined by a man I can now call a friend, and one that makes our roles as men better because he's here to help us make smart moves and go boldly into that good night. My guest today is Ryan Michler of ORDER OF MAN. Through his site, podcast, and personal missions, Ryan is driven to take back what it means to be a man, and he wants us all to learn together – from the best men the world has to offer. From interviews like this one, to personal stories of struggle and success, everyone in the Order of Man takes with him a piece of the lessons to apply in his life. He grew up without a permanent father figure in his life, missing out on some of the wholesome ‘fatherly” moments you might see on TV – playing catch, working on a car together, building a treehouse, etc. He and I share the same sentiment that there is, in fact, a difference between being a male and being a man, and we're both working to help make men better. As a father, he takes his commitments and agreements to heart, and works to build solid foundations and principles with and for his kids. Ryan and I got the chance to meet and trade stories in person in mid-March at StyleCon 2016 in Atlanta, and I knew I wanted to share his wisdom with you, my listeners. Definitely make your way to orderofman.com and discover more about his mission, his story, and his wisdom, including the Iron Council – a division dedicated to helping men develop deeper, more meaning full relationships with their spouses, families, and themselves. It's about setting fire to the possibilities around you. Okay, quick note on the audio here, guys. The first 2 minutes of audio is completely unusable so that's why it's missing. The internet can be a fickle beast sometimes and the audio was so choppy through Skype, it has to be thrown out. Let's open the interview by jumping right into Ryan's story and his take on what he sees going on in society – and WHY he started Order of Man.

In the game of life, we are all seeking better performance. Whether that means better performance at our jobs, our relationships, our athletics, or in the bedroom, we want to be better – we need to be better. When it comes to actually achieving that better-ness, we often seek answers and solutions in the wrong direction. We chase external supplements, external validation, comparisons, and even approval from people beneath us. In our quest for better performance, we often discount ourselves for the validation from someone else. This is no good. The secret to better performance in everything is actually pretty simple: it's a game of you vs. you. Let's explore what this all means.

Entrepreneurs know the impact haters can have on their success, and more importantly, look for them as an indicator that they're on the right track. As an owner of several ventures, I'm always on the lookout for detractors and naysayers because they provide me with motivation that I can't get from my best cheerleaders. Strange as it may sound, someone looking at your ideas and telling you they're not possible or impractical or stupid or ridiculous or (fill in the blank) will often light a fire inside you to prove them wrong. Rather than talk about what you need to do to make your haters happy, let's instead explore 7 ways your haters are important for your success. Take a listen:

There comes a time in every man's education when he reaches the conclusion that the happiness of those he loves is paramount to his own. It is at this moment that the realness of that man begins to blossom. He becomes more than he's ever been. He becomes a better listener, a better provider (for himself and others), and a driving force for greater, less trivial things. This is what love does. Every single time. Unfortunately, men often commit when they're in-love with lust, and in-lust with rom-com love – you know, the kind of love you see in the movies where everything is perfect and hilarious, you're happy, and you're both sexually magnificent. We all want that kind of life, right? Real life relationships aren't always like that, but they don't have to be "hard work," contrary to what the talking heads on TV would have you believe. Here are 5 tips for improving your marriage – or any serious relationship for that matter.