Bad Movies & Beer

Cooper and Nolan are back in action this week when they cover DEATH WISH 3! This may be the shortest ever episode of this podcast, but when an extremely large portion of this movie is just Charles Bronson killing punks while thousands of completely ineffective bullets fly his way, how much is there to talk about? Still, the near-total absence of meaningful plot elements and characters doesn't stop the guys from covering college nicknames, criminal defense attorneys sleeping with their clients, and whether being invisible would make you a better police officer (stick around to the end to hear that part). At the end of the day it's a Cannon film starring Charles Bronson, so count on having a good time; this episode (featuring not one but TWO beers from Third Moon Brewing) will leave you wishing there was more. 

Cooper and Nolan are plugging in this week when they cover Wes Craven's SHOCKER! This supernatural serial killer story is heavy on action but light on details, which left the guys having to guess how or why a lot of stuff was happening. Maybe that's why they spent their time pulling from other movies like Poltergeist, Ghostbusters, and the director's own Nightmare on Elm Street to try to make sense of it. Still, with bigtime 80s horror vibes and a title that's easy to confuse with something else, you might want to find something to bite down on; this episode (featuring a beer from the Powerhouse Brewing Company) is 100,000 volts of fun!

Cooper and Nolan are reporting for duty this week when they cover Steven Spielberg's 1941! An over the top, madcap comedy with bankable stars, big set pieces and an anti-war (some say anti-American) message might have sounded good on paper, but unfortunately Spielberg forgot that comedies are supposed to be funny. Whether or not that was actually the goal or just a loose pretense for him to blow up a bunch of stuff we'll never know, but the guys were left trying to entertain themselves. Which, in addition to the usual assortment of silliness and d**k jokes, somehow ended up with Maggie Gyllenhaal catching strays.  Still, there's nothing to lose by enlisting in the conversation; this episode (featuring a beer from Eagle Brewery) might just make you want to stand up and salute!

Cooper and Nolan are ready to rock this week when they cover HARD ROCK ZOMBIES!  This musical horror/comedy is the kind of insane fever dream that's almost indescribable. Werewolf grandmothers, eyepatch-wearing little people, and zombie gas chambers are just some of the surprises you can expect to find - just don't hold your breath for any actual hard rock. Still, any movie with the Cannon Films logo in front of it is basically a backstage pass to fun, so rise up and press play; this episode (featuring a beer from Indie Ale House) has more life in it than you might think!

Cooper and Nolan are leaving it in park this week when they cover JURASSIC PARK III by special request! One of the earliest examples of fan service, this sequel features multiple actors phoning it in while CGI dinosaurs roam free in the background. It also asks the question: What if William H. Macy's character from Boogie Nights had his son go missing on an island full of escaped dinosaurs? That last bit might be an exaggeration, but it's not a stretch to say that this movie put the Jurassic Park franchise back in amber for over a decade. They say life finds a way, but can beer find a way to make watching this even slightly enjoyable? This episode (featuring a beer from Phillips Brewing & Malting Co.) holds the key to finding out - just make sure you lock the cage door when you leave.

Cooper and Nolan are ready to protect and serve this week, when they finally cover SGT. KABUKIMAN N.Y.P.D.! This trip to Tromaville (by way of NYC) has been a long time coming, and the guys are bringing in a noted tapehead and trash cinema fan to help them navigate all of the strange sights and sounds. And with some of the most ridiculous plot points, practical FX, and wigs you could possibly imagine, this special guest definitely has his work cut out for him - but not as much a Nolan trying to tiptoe around the movie's problematic stereotypes. Words won't do this one justice, you're just going to have to taste it, so grab your chopsticks; this episode (featuring a beer from Godspeed Brewery) is a comedy experience you'll want to dive into.

Cooper and Nolan aren't messing around this week when they meet FOXY BROWN! This Blaxploitation classic was meant to be a sequel to Coffy, and with the many, MANY things they have in common it really shows. Which is great news for the guys, since they both feel like they rated Coffy too low back in Season 2. Are familiar genre features and the welcome presence of Pam Grier enough to put this thing on top? Or will the absence of hooker fights and a questionable big bad send it straight downtown? The answer is floating around in here somewhere, so open the jar on this episode (featuring a beer from Amsterdam Brewing Co.) and find out!

Cooper and Nolan are bringing back Bond this week when they cover Roger Moore's first turn as 007 in LIVE AND LET DIE! Seeing as this movie - ahem - borrows heavily from the Blaxploitation film genre, it feels appropriate that the guys are talking about it during Black History Month. From the stereotypical occupation of main villain Dr. Kananga, to the flamboyant 70s style of Baron Samedi, to the less than flattering portrayal of certain southern characters, let's just say there's a lot that doesn't look great with the benefit of hindsight. Still, some things (like a kick-ass theme song or Jane Seymour's beauty) are timeless, so maybe it's better to live and let live. Either way, this episode (featuring a beer from the Silversmith Brewing Co.) proves one thing - nobody does it like Bond!

Cooper and Nolan are welcoming winter this week when they cover JACK FROST! This infamous straight-to-video horror movie about a homicidal snowman might have the same name as the family film starring Michael Keaton, but as anyone who came home from Blockbuster Video in the late 90s only to find the VHS tapes switched can tell you, they are VERY different things.  For example: would two guys watching the family friendly Jack Frost spend their time arguing about shrinkage, the rules of manslaughter, or how much better the movie would be if it starred Tom Atkins? (Ok, maybe that last one.) Either way, this episode (featuring a beer from Grain & Grit Beer Co.) is one you won't want to leave on ice. After all, there's no excuse for not cleaning out your freezer!

Cooper and Nolan are turning the page this week when they take on RIKI-OH: THE STORY OF RICKY! This bats**t crazy Hong Kong martial arts movie is filled with some of the most jaw-dropping practical effects that the early 90s had to offer. Add in the ridiculously over-the-top characters, overdubs, and story elements, and you have something the guys were struggling to classify. Is this a comedy? Much like the source of Riki-Oh's incredible powers, the answer may never be fully known. But when a movie is this insanely entertaining... does it matter?  Don't lose your head worrying about the details; this episode (featuring a beer from Storyteller Beverages) is one story you won't be able to put down!

Cooper and Nolan are hoping for a miracle this week, when they cover SURVIVING CHRISTMAS! Holiday cheer is in short supply in this early 2000s comedy, which came at a low point in star Ben Affleck's career. But maybe - just maybe - an implausible romantic subplot, jokes about masturbation, and a cameo appearance from Udo Kier can help this thing be seen in a new light. Sound crazy? That might be the alcohol talking, as the guys continue their annual tradition of sampling MANY beers, this time from the Oranje Son Brewing advent case. Make sure there's room at the table either way; this very special CHRISTMAS EPISODE is definitely one you'll want to bring home for the holidays!

In this very special BONUS EPISODE, Cooper and Nolan unbox the first 18 beers from Oranje Son Brewing's 2024 Beer Advent Calendar! Hear the guys' first impressions as they each attempt to build the best possible beer roster for SURVIVING CHRISTMAS, while also reflecting on preferred styles, scandalous family secrets, and the current state of craft beer. So take a listen, and before long you just might be dreaming of an Oranje Christmas!

Cooper and Nolan are looking on up at the bottom this week, as they go BEYOND THE VALLEY OF THE DOLLS! Free love is flowing in this hippie-era tale of temptation thanks to infamous exploitation director Russ Meyer, and the guys are going along for the ride. And what a ride it is! One featuring sex, drugs, Superwoman, and the music of Strawberry Alarm Clock. Not to mention a bunch of over the top performances, and the most laughably intense overlays you'll ever see... or hear about. Bottom line? It's a happening, and it just might freak you out; this episode (featuring a beer from Farm League Brewing) goes beyond anything you could have expected.

Cooper and Nolan are having a night to remember this week, when they cover the early 80s sci-fi horror NIGHT BEAST by special request! Now if only they could remember who requested it... The guys may not be 100% sure who asked them to cover this, but what's certain is that the story about a small Baltimore-area town being threatened by a laser-toting alien is absolutely bonkers. Is the title of this movie accurate? Can the awkward sheriff, his sexy deputy, a corrupt mayor, a monotone coroner, and the most heroic civilian you could possibly imagine stop it from destroying the human race? And does this story actually take place in the 1950s? 2/3 of these questions may never be answered, but the chances are MUCH better that you'll enjoy yourself along the way; this episode (featuring a beer from the Avling Brewery) is an absolute beast of a good time.

Cooper and Nolan are making a break for it this week when they cover THE RUNNING MAN! Based on a novel by Steven King, this action packed piece of 80s sci-fi makes some surprisingly accurate predictions about the future, and features what is arguably an underrated Arnold Schwarzenegger performance. Is that enough to overcome the paper thin characters, questionable fashion choices, and heavy handed social commentary of the era? Maybe not, but the guys are having a great time either way. So get ready to hit the ground running; this episode (featuring a beer from Dawson Trail Craft Brewing) is one game you'll be glad you played.

Cooper and Nolan are keeping things in the family this week when they talk TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE: THE NEXT GENERATION! This ill-fated attempt to reboot a beloved franchise is full of confusing elements, from the filmmaker's intended message to whether or not aliens are involved in the bizarre conspiracy theory subplot, to Leatherface's sudden identity crisis. But maybe the most confusing thing of all was the guys ending up on the exact opposite sides of an argument that you would expect them to.  It's a spooky switcheroo that you're definitely going to want to experience for yourself, so grab your chainsaw! This special Halloween episode (featuring a beer from the Neustadt Springs Brewery) is revved up and ready for your enjoyment!

Cooper and Nolan are headed for paradise this week when they buy a HARD TICKET TO HAWAII! This legendary piece of 80s cheese features embarrassing dialogue, laughable special effects, and some of the worst acting ever captured on film. But what it lacks in production value it makes up for in sheer, unbridled enthusiasm... for nudity. With that list of ingredients it's no wonder the guys have had this movie on THEIR list since Day 1. So book your ticket today; this episode (featuring a beer from Spearhead Brewing Company) is a trip you'll never forget!

Cooper and Nolan are searching for simpler times this week when they explore THE VILLAGE! Some people remember this as M. Night Shyamalan's last "good" movie before things fell apart in the mid 2000s, but had cracks already started to form beneath the surface? Between that and topics like city living vs. country living, whether or not restorative justice works, and how gracefully Sigourney Weaver is aging, there's plenty for the guys to debate. But there's one thing they both agree on - Adrien Brody should have taken Robert Downey Jr.'s advice from Tropic Thunder. Ready to get rustic? It might have taken a village to make this episode (featuring a beer from Four Fathers Brewing Co.), but all you have to do to enjoy it is press play!

Cooper and Nolan are dropping the hammer this week, as they experience DAYS OF THUNDER! This early 90s Tom Cruise NASCAR movie was inexplicably written by the same guy who did Chinatown, but whereas that movie was a stylish noir full of complex characters and sharp dialogue, this one is basically Top Gun in cars. Still, any movie that features Tom Cruise raging out, misidentifying sex workers, and engaging in endless d*** measuring contests is worth talking about, so ladies and gentlemen, start your engines! This episode (featuring a beer from Canvas Brewing Co.) is headed straight for victory lane.

Cooper and Nolan are back for another season and trying not to blow it when they cover the winner of this year's audience poll - NINJA IN THE CLAWS OF THE CIA! In this seldom-seen early 80s disasterpiece, legendary martial artist John Liu takes on not one but TWO starring roles in a movie that he also wrote and directed, which according to the guys is about 3 jobs too many.  And as if being hilariously overdubbed, frantically edited, and featuring random scenes that are entirely in Spanish wasn't ridiculous enough, there's also a subplot where the main character has to avoid seduction that launches this movie into truly unbelievable territory.  So don't try to hold out any longer; this very special SEASON PREMIERE episode (featuring a beer from Muskoka Brewery) is loaded up and ready to burst!

Cooper and Nolan are getting trashed this week when they cover THE GARBAGE PAIL KIDS MOVIE! Despite the tagline promising a live action heap of fun, when the guys lifted the lid on this stinker that is NOT what they found. Luckily there's lots to talk about, from the truly haunting Garbage Pail Kids' head effects to 80s parenting techniques to who is and isn't allowed to wear a dashiki. There's a lot more to be found as well, so get ready to sift through the mess; this episode (featuring a beer from All My Friends Beer Co.) is one you won't want to throw away!

Cooper and Nolan are wrapping up their 4th season with a prime episode this week when they cover TRANSFORMERS: REVENGE OF THE FALLEN! The second installment in Michael Bay's Transformers franchise takes a lot of flak, and rightly so. But while the guys were fully prepared for the overblown CGI and cringey dialogue in this movie, they were NOT ready for the surprising amount of sexuality, or the even more surprising emotional reactions they both had while watching it. Throw in some racist Autobots, a robot version of TMZ, and Megan Fox's toe thumbs, and you've got the makings of a truly ridiculous time. So dust off the old Camaro; this very special SEASON FINALE episode (featuring a beer from Kings County Brewers Collective) is more than meets the eye!

Cooper and Nolan are going back to biology class this week when they dissect C.H.U.D. II: BUD THE C.H.U.D.! This nonsensical sequel leans HARD into comedy, and inexplicably has nothing to do with the original C.H.U.D. Which is bad news for C.H.U.D. superfans (like a special guest who joins the podcast this week), but great news for anyone who enjoys speculating on topics like the fastest way to open a trunk, whether or not Robert Vaughn was drunk during filming, and if it's true what they say about men with big feet. With all of that plus what might be the most obscure Canadian reference ever, this episode (featuring a certain controversial macrobrew) has got plenty of meat on the bone.

Cooper and Nolan are tasting the water of life this week when they cover the original DUNE! This notorious Dino De Laurentiis production was plagued with studio interference, visual effects problems, and Kyle MacLachlan's terrible acting, all of which forced director David Lynch to have to cram a whole book series' worth of story into a two hour movie. The result was a confusing, plot heavy mess that for some reason features a VERY sweaty Sting. But is that bizarre piece of casting (along with the curiosity of watching a legendary bomb for the first time) enough to make this enjoyable for the guys? According to an ancient prophecy, this episode (featuring a beer from Dune Hopper Brewing Co.) contains the answer!

Cooper and Nolan are going off the rails this week when they board the TERROR TRAIN by special request! This canuxploitation slasher stars Jamie Lee Curtis in another enjoyable scream queen performance, but it's a cameo by legendary 80s magician David Copperfield that REALLY captures the guys' imaginations. His potential role in getting this movie made is just one of many theories shared in this episode, along with Charles Bronson's underwear preferences, nursing home romance, and what makes an effective fraternity prank - not to mention the superior sequel to this movie that COULD have been made. The train is absolutely packed and it's leaving the station, so make sure you're on time; this episode (featuring a beer from Railway City Brewing) is one you don't want to miss!

Cooper and Nolan are taking a trip to the Hamptons this week when they spend a WEEKEND AT BERNIE'S! This raucous 80s comedy was a video store staple when the guys were younger, but that doesn't mean it'll hold up today. Still, with phallic buildings, antiquated technology, and rigor mortis all entering the chat, there's definitely going to be stuff to laugh at.  So whether you're more of a Richard or a Larry, there's one thing we can practically guarantee: this episode (featuring a beer from Rogue Ales) is more fun than a day at the beach!

Cooper and Nolan are living up to their two star reviews this week when they unleash a big gooey helping of THE STUFF! The fact that the planetary threat in this movie is a white, viscous ooze definitely causes the guys to give in to their worst impulses. But despite getting swept away in a seemingly endless stream of juvenile humor, they still manage to weigh in on Cold War era paranoia, the addictive nature of social media, and the type of acting roles that were available to women in the 80s.  If you like satire (or marshmallows), then open wide; this episode (featuring a beer collaboration from the Mortalis and 450 North Brewing Companies) is one you'll definitely want to taste.

Cooper and Nolan are revving up for intense 90s action this week when they cover STONE COLD! What happens when former NFL linebacker Brian "The Boz" Bosworth goes undercover to bring down a notorious biker gang known as The Brotherhood? The answer involves fist fights, motorcycle chases, and a LOT of explosions. Like a ridiculous amount, and the guys are running through all of it. They'll also decide once and for all where The Boz ranks on the all-time list of football players turned actors, so come along for the ride; this episode (featuring a beer from El Segundo Brewing) definitely won't leave you cold.

It's franchise crossover Friday this week, when Cooper and Nolan get caught in the middle of Alien vs. Predator! Between the poorly developed characters, paint by numbers plot, and early 2000s CGI, it's easy to see why fans of the Alien AND Predator franchises were massively disappointed when this came out. But now, with almost 20 years of distance, the guys are looking at this movie with fresh eyes. Is it possible it isn't actually as bad as they remember? Or are they ignoring more warning signs than the crew of Charles Bishop Weyland's doomed expedition? Either way, this thing is a battle of two evils and humanity just might hang in the balance. Luckily for all of us, this episode (featuring not one but TWO beers from Dominion City Brewing Co.) is a winner no matter which side you're on.

Cooper and Nolan are making a deal with the devil this week, when they cover the remarkable tale of PETEY WHEATSTRAW! Podcast favorite Rudy Ray Moore puts his unique spin on the Faustian legend in this unforgettable piece of Blaxploitation filmmaking, and the results are as silly, sexy, and surreal as you would expect.  Not surprisingly, the guys have a lot of fun with this one, as they debate whether creativity can win out over an extremely limited budget, what exactly constituted proper funeral attire for the 1970s, and whether or not this movie was a good choice for Black History Month. With all that AND the incredible comedy stylings of Leroy & Skillet, this episode (featuring a beer from Clifford Brewing Co.) is one you won't have to sell your soul to enjoy.

Love is in the air this week as Cooper and Nolan spend Valentine's Day with THE BITCH! This sassy 70s audience request puts the scandalous exploits of the rich and famous on full display, giving a window into a world that most people have never known. The result is a disco-filled feast for the eyes (and ears), as the guys riff on swimming pool orgies, what it takes to get knighted, and the best way to rig a horse race. So get ready to put yourself out there; whether you're looking for love or just a good time, this episode (featuring a beer from ABE ERB Brewing Company) is sure to capture your heart.

Cooper and Nolan are heading into the eye of the storm this week when they talk HARD TO KILL! This early 90s Steven Seagal outing is absolutely LOADED with action movie clichés - montages, car chases, bad guys with terrible accuracy - not to mention a one-liner so great that it almost redeems a ridiculous script. (Almost.) Throw in an acting performance that can only be described as unbelievable and you've got the makings of a truly silly time that the guys agree absolutely belongs on this podcast. So if you've been sleeping on Seagal's career, it's time to wake up and shave your coma beard; this episode (featuring a beer from the Storm Stayed Brewing Company) might be hard to kill, but it's easy to enjoy!

Cooper and Nolan are trapped on an island of low-budget regional filmmaking this week when they cover ATTACK OF THE BEAST CREATURES! This Connecticut curiosity boasts some of the worst acting and special effects that have ever been discussed on this podcast, but is the presence of puppets enough to make it an enjoyable watch? If the time the guys spend talking about the Titanic, men who love GILFs, and historic d**k bites are any indication, the answer is no! Either way, there's no need to tread lightly; this episode (featuring a beer from the Good Robot Brewing Company) is one creature you'll be glad to meet.

Cooper and Nolan are having a hell of a good time this week, as they ring in the new year with JASON GOES TO HELL: THE FINAL FRIDAY! This might be the most confusing of all the Friday the 13th movies, so thank goodness there's a character who knows literally everything that's going on and is more than happy to explain it. But even with exposition taking human form there was plenty for the guys to ponder, like Jason Voorhees' views on unprotected sex, which more successful actor the hero is a poor man's version of, and whether being reborn means getting a brand new body or just your old body back. One thing's for sure - whether you consider this a 90s horror classic or a movie that puts the "camp" back into Camp Crystal Lake, this episode (featuring a beer from Helltown Brewing) is sure to get your heart racing.

Cooper and Nolan are having a Cannon Films Christmas this year when they cover INVASION U.S.A.! Unfortunately, what should have been a merry celebration of Chuck Norris and all-denim wardrobes quickly devolved into a bunch of angry shouting about unnecessary characters and the absence of kicks. Did the many, MANY beers the guys drank during the recording process have something to do with this? We're not saying they did, but at one point Nolan legitimately confused the main bad guy (a Russian terrorist mercenary) with Inigo Montoya from the Princess Bride. If that last sentence confused you, just wait til you see what else is under the tree; this episode (featuring 12 days worth of beer from the 2023 Fattey Beer Co. advent calendar) is one present you can't put back in the box!

In this very special BONUS EPISODE, Cooper and Nolan unbox the first 17 beers from the Fattey Beer Co.'s 2023 Beer Advent Calendar! What kind of delicious American beers will the guys find inside? Who will end up drafting what for this week's INVASION U.S.A. episode? And what's the right way to pronounce "pecan"? The answers to all these questions and more are ready for you to discover, so don't wait til Christmas - unwrap this episode and dive in!

Cooper and Nolan are making a horrifying house call this week with DR. BLACK, MR. HYDE! It's a classic tale of one man's obsession pushing him over the edge, and it forces the guys to reconsider everything they thought they knew about topics like white people, Pretty Woman, and whether there's a positive side to doctors dating their patients. They even fire off a quick Blaxploitation power ranking, all while enjoying not one but TWO beers from Necromancer Brewing. There's nothing to be afraid of here; with so much going on you'll definitely want to give this episode a shot.

The guys are stepping into the confessional this week when they finally cover THE VELOCIPASTOR! There's all kinds of sins being revealed in this one, from Nolan's views on the Catholic Church to Cooper's binary dating scale, not to mention one of the worst superhero origin stories ever produced. Add in the very real possibility of dinosaur/human intimacy and it's no wonder this ended up as one of the most heavily edited (and ridiculous) episodes in the history of this podcast. Featuring a beer from the Church Brew Works.

Court is in session this week, and Cooper and Nolan are delivering their verdict on yet another notorious 90s comic book adaptation - JUDGE DREDD! This underwhelming sci-fi/action hybrid definitely won't show up on any Sylvester Stallone highlight reels, but it DOES give the guys a chance to talk about deliberate casting, early green screen technology, and the comedy stylings of Rob Schneider. Throw in some questionable Stallone impressions and not one but TWO near-spit takes, and you won't need to wait for a jury to deliberate; this episode (featuring a beer from the 555 Brewing Co.) is guilty of being a great time!

Cooper and Nolan are summoning some Halloween controversy this week, by digging into 80s cult classic PUMPKINHEAD! Instead of trying to find a beer to match a movie, the guys decided to find a movie to match the Shipyard Brewing Company's wildly popular Pumpkinhead ale. That seemed like a good idea on paper, but it turns out the movie isn't NEARLY bad enough to appear on this podcast. Luckily there's still plenty to talk (and laugh) about - from questionable character decisions to whether or not the title makes sense to a case of hilariously unfortunate tail placement. Not to mention a decisive "which practical fx were better" showdown with the topic of our last episode... Mac and Me! If you're in the mood for some spooky fun, then take a trip down to the podcast patch; this very special Halloween episode is ripe for the picking!

Cooper and Nolan are headed downhill by special request this week, when they discuss what many consider one of the worst movies ever made - MAC AND ME! This shameless ripoff of a MUCH more popular 80s movie is more nightmare than nostalgia, but that won't stop the guys from having a good time. And thanks to the terrible creature effects, even worse acting, and one of the most batsh*t crazy ending sequences you could possibly imagine, the conversation goes in some truly hilarious directions. Ready to come along for the ride? Then get your wheels in motion; this episode (featuring a beer from Grist House Craft Brewery) is out of this world... and into your heart.

Cooper and Nolan are sending out an S.O.S. this week when they board the DEATH SHIP! It's horror on the high seas, but the most disturbing thing might be seeing Captain Ed from The Naked Gun movies murdering a bunch of cruise ship employees. Throw in some World War II backstory, VERY so-so makeup effects, and some - ahem - homages to more famous movies and you've got an ocean adventure that's sure to raise your sail. Featuring a beer from Adnam's Southwold Brewing company.

Cooper and Nolan are cleaning up the streets this week with some help from a beloved cult icon - THE TOXIC AVENGER! After waiting literally YEARS to talk about this movie, the guys are going all out. From the pros and cons of dating the blind, to white slavery, to whether or not it's sadder to see a cute dog die than a human child, nothing is out of bounds in this conversation (except dry-cleaning jeans). Throw in the usual assortment of immature humor and d*ck jokes - all teed up perfectly by the fine folks at Troma and a ridiculous screenplay - and you've got the makings of a MONSTER episode that's more fun than you can shake a mop at! Featuring a beer from Lot 10 Brewing Company.

Cooper and Nolan are back from vacation and kicking things off with a surprise Saturday Season Premiere, as they cover the movie that YOU voted for - DANTE'S PEAK! Is this an underrated 90s gem, or yet another in a long line of forgettable disaster movies? That's just one topic the guys are racing to get to the bottom of, along with the number of sexy mayors, the best (and worst) ways to evacuate a city, and how long Pierce Brosnan can hold his bladder. Things heat up quickly in this one, so get ready to move; this SEASON PREMIERE episode (featuring a beer from Aslin Beer Co.) is an eruption of fun just waiting to happen!

Cooper and Nolan will be back in just a few days with the first of 22 ALL NEW EPISODES! Until then, here's a little taste of what the guys have on tap for Season 4.

Cooper and Nolan are hitting rewind in this very special BONUS EPISODE, when they get some JUSTICE NINJA STYLE from the fine folks at VHShitfest! This shot on video labor of love packs a ton of action, low-budget production value, and glorious 80s hair into its surprisingly short run time, and was produced with the full support of the town of DeSoto, Missouri - resulting in a delightfully unique man on the run story/time capsule with tons of local flavor. It's a blink and you'll miss it kind of movie, so keep your eyes open; this episode (featuring a beer from Town Brewery) is one you'll definitely want to catch before it disappears!

It's the 100th episode of Bad Movies & Beer, and Cooper and Nolan are dusting off their fedoras for one more adventure with INDIANA JONES AND THE KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL! As any 80s kid will tell you, the Indiana Jones trilogy is practically sacred. At least it WAS, until one of Steven Spielberg's friends (a certain director from a galaxy far, far away) convinced him to squeeze even more money out of a beloved franchise.  Did Spielberg and you-know-who manage to stick the landing by infusing an appropriate amount of nostalgia and fan service into a brand new story, all while remaining true to the spirit and characters of the original movies? OR... did they create something so terrible that the guys end up using the term "egregious" approximately 30 times in the course of describing it? You can find the answer by clicking play, but what you WON'T find is Cooper's enjoyable rating, thanks to an argument so heated it caused him to forget all about it. Still, there's plenty of treasures here for the taking; this episode (featuring a beer from the Sleeping Giant Brewing Company) is one you'll definitely want to explore!

Cooper and Nolan are hitting the ice this week to talk about notable mid-80s hockey drama (and hot young actor showcase) YOUNGBLOOD! The guys realized early on that trying to keep up with this much end-to-end action would be too tough to do alone, so they're rounding out their top line with a special guest star who's also got a personal connection to this week's beer. The result is a rock 'em sock 'em riff on sports movie clichés, Canadian stereotypes, and whether or not Keanu Reeves can pull off an accent (spoiler alert: he can not).  So strap on your skates, because you're going in; this episode (featuring a beer from Locker Room Bev Co.) is outrageous fun from the second the puck drops!

Cooper and Nolan have been embracing the 90s slacker spirit this week, but that won't stop them from unleashing their IDLE HANDS episode! (Although it is a day or two late...) When this combination horror movie/stoner comedy hit theaters, the guys were right in the middle of the target demo. So why don't either of them remember it fondly?  Maybe it's the lazy humor, or teen heartthrob Devon Sawa's lame attempts at physical comedy. Or maybe it's the fact that the whole thing feels like it was cooked up in a lab as a way to get money from teenagers. Whatever the reason, the conversation wanders to some truly strange places - from why women love Devon Sawa to zombie physiology to whether or not movie crushes get grandfathered in as you get older.  It's a real window into 90s nostalgia, so get ready to roll up your sleeves; this episode (featuring a beer from Left Hand Brewing Co.) is one you won't be able to keep your hands off of!

Cooper and Nolan are getting back into the Charles Bronson business this week, when they take on 10 TO MIDNIGHT! As if the vaguely sexual title (maybe) and impotence of the killer weren't enough fuel for the guys' constant stream of d**k jokes, this sordid crime thriller also features an EXTREMELY primitive version of a fleshlight (which is NOT what Nolan calls it). Listener discretion is definitely advised for this one, so get ready for a gritty good time; this episode (featuring a beer from Grand River Brewing) won't stop when the clock strikes 12!

The guys are breaking out the heavy artillery this week when they go to war over TANK GIRL! Nolan's undying love for this mid-90s bomb combined with Cooper's much more mainstream feelings about it (and a sneaking suspicion that he's being trolled) leads to the biggest argument in the history of the podcast. But there's still plenty they're covering before that happens - like how exactly some actors become the go-to guy for creepy roles, whether interspecies relationships would be tolerated in a post-apocalyptic future, and whether or not a romantic soundtrack can include the music of Ice-T. The battle lines are being drawn, so grab your helmet and pick a side; this episode (featuring a beer from Mill Street Brewery) is cocked, locked, and ready to rock!