BeThatHealingGirl Podcast

This week, we're diving deep into a topic I know hits home for so many high-achieving, anxious girlies: why stillness can feel so unsafe when you have relationship anxiety. If you ever catch yourself spiraling because the vibe feels “off,” or if a little space in communication has you convinced the whole relationship is doomed…this episode is for you. Inside this episode, I'm sharing: ✨ Why anxious attachment makes rest and stillness feel dangerous ✨ How I learned to stop overfunctioning and start receiving love (hint: it took surgery and a lot of surrender) ✨ What my explant and fibroid journeys taught me about safety, slowing down, and trusting myself ✨ The belief I had to UNLEARN in order to feel secure in my body and my relationships   ✨ Why stillness is a skill (especially if you grew up in a high-pressure, achievement-driven household)   ✨ How I support Healing Girl Gang members in rewiring their nervous systems for safety and self-trust ✨ A powerful listener Q&A about breaking the cycle of anxious spiraling in a secure relationship Whether you're a career rockstar, business owner, or have a few letters behind your name (MD, RN, Esq, PhD…) — and yet still feel like a mess when someone doesn't text back, you're in the right place. This episode isn't about fixing you... it's about helping you feel safe enough to finally rest, receive, and trust yourself and your partner. If you're ready to learn how to stop self-sabotaging and start feeling safe in love, hit play. And if you're craving step-by-step support, come join us inside The Healing Girl Gang (where we practice these tools every single month!)  

If you're constantly planning, smoothing things over, doing the most in your relationship while low-key wondering “Why can't they just do more??” — this episode is for you.

In this episoe we're talking about how to feel like a priority in your relationship... without slipping into overthinking, over‑analyzing every text, or feeling like you're “asking for too much.” This episode is for you if: • You know they care about you… but you can't always feel it • You find yourself checking for proof or reassurance • You are tired of being the one initiating, planning, or emotionally leading • Your brain does wind sprints when there's space or distance in the relationship • You're successful in every other area of life, but your nervous system goes ✨ feral✨ in love   Trust me, I've lived this. I went from anxiously attached (and chronically exhausted from managing the relationship in my head) to actually feeling chosen, safe, and prioritized in a secure partnership. And we're unpacking exactly how that shift happens today.

You're not needy. You're just healing! In this episode, I'm sharing how I accidentally rewired my anxious attachment into a secure one...without forcing it, faking it, or labeling myself as “crazy.” If you've ever found yourself wondering: “Why am I spiraling when everything is fine?” “Why do I panic when things finally feel safe?” …or “Why can't I just stay calm in a good relationship?” This one's for you, bb

Welcome back BBs! In this episode, we're diving deep into a pattern I see all the time: acting “chill” when inside, you're spiraling. You know the drill...trying so hard to come off as the "cool-low-maintenance-unbothered-girlie" so you don't scare a good partner away… but then end up feeling lonely, disconnected, or like they're slipping further away anyway... Yeah, we're unpacking THAT. We're talking: ✨ Why “being chill” is often just masked FEAR ✨ How inauthenticity actually erodes intimacy ✨ What safe partners are really craving (hint: it's not perfection) and ✨ How to stop false-signaling and start authentically expressing what's real for YOU! Whether you're anxiously attached, healing from abandonment, or a high-achieving, high-performing baddie who secretly (or not-so-secretly) melts down when someone doesn't text back right away… this one's for you.

If you're in a healthy relationship but your brain won't stop spiraling... this episode is going to hit home. In this week's episode I'm breaking down the 3 mistakes that keep high-achieving, anxious girlies stuck in the cycle of second-guessing even the most loyal and consistent partner. If you've ever found yourself thinking: “Why can't I just enjoy this person?” “Why am I prepping for the breakup when everything's going fine?” “Am I making problems where there are none?”

This week we're unpacking the real reason your brain confuses anxiety for intuition (and how to stop self‑sabotaging a healthy relationship!) If you've ever questioned your feelings, overanalyzed your partner's every move, or convinced yourself your anxiety was a “gut feeling,” this episode is for you!

In this episode we're unpacking one of the most confusing (and exhausting) dynamics in anxious relationships ➡️ Anxiety vs. Intuition. And why your nervous system can't tell the difference.... yet.  We'll dive into: ✨ The #1 way to know it's anxiety (not intuition) ✨ How urgency, reactivity & spiraling feel like instinct - but aren't ✨ Why you're addicted to checking the “emotional alarm system” ✨ What happens when your gut is actually trauma memory ✨ How to disable the internal alarm so you stop mistaking fear for truth ✨ What it actually feels like when your intuition is speaking PLUS:

You're Not Overreacting - You're Dysregulated (Here's Why It Feels Like Everything's Falling Apart When It's Actually Fine) You're not crazy. You're not being dramatic. You're just dysregulated AF and your body hasn't caught up to how safe your life actually is. This episode is for the high-functioning, hyper-self-aware girlies who are checking all the boxes on paper... but still secretly spiraling in silence.

You've read the books, saved the Instagram carousels, diagnosed your attachment style (hi anxious girlies

Do you go to overthinking the second the vibes are off? Scroll TikTok for answers before the text even delivers? Google “anxious attachment + texting” like it's your part-time job? Yeah. Me too. This episode is for the girlies who know they're spiraling and feel like they can't stop—especially when they're dating someone good. If overthinking has become your coping mechanism in relationships, this episode will land. We're talking: • Why your brain loves overthinking (hint: dopamine) • Why it feels productive, but actually disconnects you from real connection • How you're using mental work to avoid emotional work • The real reason you can explain your triggers but still don't feel better I also share a story from my own spiral (yes, the lost RV keys) and shout out a few of my amazing clients who are breaking this cycle in real time—especially Seth and Autumn (you're killin' it

✨ You've read the books. Listened to the podcasts. You could give a TED Talk on attachment styles. So why are you still spiraling?! In this episode I'm talking to YOU, the high-achieving, emotionally intelligent girlie who knows her patterns but still finds herself overthinking texts, replaying convos, and getting caught in the same loop with the same person... again. If you've ever thought:

✨ Ever feel like your brain just won't shut off... even when everything's actually fine in your relationship? You're spiraling, checking for signs, running worst-case scenarios, and overanalyzing their every move... but you know deep down, it's you, not them.

After six weeks of serious inner work (including a spiritual cleanse and a solo wilderness retreat where I literally faced my fear of abandonment head-on), I'm sharing the three biggest things that helped me stop overthinking once and for all. If you're the kind of girly who spirals over a short text... rereads convos wondering what you did wrong... or catastrophizes when nothing is actually wrong... this episode is going to hit deep. Inside, we'll talk about: ✨ What it really means to listen to your body (and why it matters for your anxious brain) ✨ How productivity pressure secretly fuels relationship anxiety ✨ The difference between your gut and your fear brain ✨ And how I finally felt safe doing... nothing. Just being. Truly. PLUS: tomorrow (Wednesday!) is Implementation Day inside The Healing Girl Gang and this month's focus is on Overthinking. If you're ready for the how, this is where we get specific and walk through the process together.

If you spiral when your partner seems distant… If your brain won't stop running “what did I do wrong?” loops… If you're smart, successful, high-achieving, and still struggling with anxious thoughts in love… You are so not alone. And this episode is for you.

Ever feel like you're doing all the inner work, listening to every podcast, journaling your heart out and still fall back into the same anxious spirals or overthinking loops? SAME. In this raw and real episode, I'm pulling back the curtain and sharing what I'm still healing… even as a relationship coach. This episode is for the high-achieving, high-performing girlies who feel confident in their careers but are still spiraling in their relationships.

If You Overthink Every Text Message… This Episode Is For You! You're crushing it at work, you're a boss in life, but when it comes to your relationship? You're suddenly spiraling over why he took 6-hours to text you back or asking "are we okay" over and over again... Then this episode is your soft place to land. In this episode we're unpacking the hidden damage overthinking does to your relationships (even when things seem fine on the surface). I'll walk you through:

In this powerful episode, I sit down with my client Karuna - science writer, high achiever, and living proof that secure attachment is possible! We're talking full transformation: from spiraling over missed texts to feeling calm, confident, and deeply self-trusting in relationships (and beyond). Karuna shares the real, raw moments (crying in the shower, questioning everything, and wondering if the anxiety would ever go away). But through coaching, truth-telling, and data-driven reflection (yes, we get nerdy), she experienced a 75%+ increase in her confidence, mindset, and self-trust AND a 133% decrease in her overthinking.

Ever feel like you're just too much in your relationship?

You had an amazing weekend... the vibes were vibing, the cuddles were elite, and the connection felt so good. Then you got home, sat on the couch, and suddenly you're spiraling. Sound familiar? This episode is all about why post-vacation (or post-holiday) anxiety hits so hard (especially if you're anxiously attached and dating someone amazing). I'm breaking down the threebig reasons why you keep freaking out after it all went so well.

If slow feels boring, if calm feels confusing, and if your nervous system is low-key addicted to chaos.... this one's for you. This week, we're diving into what a secure relationship actually looks and feels like (even if your anxious attachment says, “Wait, is this it?”). Whether you're dating, in a long-term partnership, or healing from relationship patterns that feel more like rollercoasters than real connection, I'm breaking down the 6 big shifts that define secure love. ✨ Spoiler alert: It's not fast, intense, or dramatic. It's steady. Consistent. Intentional. And deeply healing (even if your brain wants to sprint toward a vibe check). We're talking: • Why moving fast ≠ connection • How to tell if you're chasing intensity instead of sincerity • What “repair” looks like vs. reaction • And why secure love might feel… weird (at first) Plus, I'm sharing an honest question from one of my Healing Girl Gang members going through a painful breakup, and offering the truth we all need when we want to hold on instead of letting go. Let's unlearn the chaos and relearn calm love, together.

It's our 6-year wedding anniversary (!!) and today I brought my husband Craig on the podcast for the realest conversation about love, growth, and the journey from spiraling to secure. We're answering your juiciest Qs: ✨ What it's really like when anxious meets avoidant ✨ Our proposal story (yes, there was a backup plan involving a dog) ✨ How we almost didn't make it—and what shifted ✨ Craig's honest take on what helped him finally “grow up” emotionally ✨ Plus: our chaotic traits, icks, inside jokes, and a BIG announcement (no, not a baby) Whether you're deep in your healing era or just curious about what it looks like to actually do this work with a partner, this episode is for you. It's honest. It's sweet. It's full of growth and some light roasting (Just the way we like it!) WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session

Still Needing Constant Reassurance in Your Relationship? Here's Why

This episode is for the anxious girlies who look like they have it all together (you've got degrees, deadlines, and the job)… but on the inside, you're checking the relationship vibes like it's your full-time job. We're talking: ✨ Why your brain craves constant reassurance and how to stop needing it ✨ The connection between high achievement & emotional hyper-vigilance ✨ How to build real self-trust (the kind that doesn't care if he texts back in 5 min or 5 hours) PLUS: I'm sharing a few of the funniest icks from the TickerTocker (and you will scream at one of them)

We're unpacking the 3 big reasons your anxious attachment isn't healing, even if you're doing everything “right.” Spoiler: it's not about trying harder… it's about trying differently. If you're a high-achieving, self-aware, anxious girlie who still feels like a walking red flag in relationships, this one's for you. We're talking: ✨ Why performing yur healing is keeping you stuck ✨ The myth of linear progress (and why healing is actually a spiral staircase ✨ How to stop overwatering the plant and just let it grow

Ever wonder what it actually looks like to go from anxious, overthinking, “I'm probably the problem” energy… to grounded, confident, and finally feeling secure in your relationship? In this raw and heart-hitting episode, I'm sitting down with one of my 1:1 coaching client, a high-achieving, military-working, nurse-extraordinaire, who decided to stop spiraling overseas (literally!) and finally heal for real. We're talking:

Welcome back to the Be That Healing Girl podcast! If your mind is spiraling, your stomach's in knots, and you've refreshed your texts 18 times in the last 3 minutes… this episode is your emergency toolkit! In this quick but powerful 5-minute pep talk, I'm giving you grounding reminders to come back home to yourself when your anxious attachment gets triggered. This is the episode to save, download, share with your bestie, and play on repeat when you're about to spiral. You'll learn: ✨ Why your anxiety makes sense (and why you're not broken) ✨ How to regulate your nervous system in the moment ✨ A powerful breathing practice to calm your body ✨ How to shift your energy back to YOU instead of chasing ✨ Loving prompts to re-center and choose yourself first If you're new here, I'm Clare, a relationship coach for high-achieving girlies who crush it at work but feel lost, anxious, or overthink-y in love. You're not alone, and you are SO not broken.

Ever find yourself refreshing your texts like your life depends on it? Or spending 10 hours doing two hours of work because your brain won't stop obsessing over that thing you said? Yep. This one's for you, bb! In this episode, I'm giving you powerful (and surprisingly calming) reminders for when your anxious attachment kicks in HARD. Whether you're deep in a spiral or just know one is brewing, these are the things I wish someone had told me when I was riding the relationship-anxiety rollercoaster daily. We're talking: - The difference between urgency and truth (spoiler: they are not the same) - Why “if it feels hysteric, it's historic” is your new healing mantra - The cold hard truth: you cannot out-logic your nervous system (sorry to my high-achieving girlies with 3 degrees and a color-coded Google calendar) Plus: a little gut health update (yes, your anxiety might be coming from your stomach), a hilarious “Would You Rather” game you're gonna want to bring to your next girls' night, and a juicy Q&A from inside the Healing Girl Gang!

Ever held it in like a champ… until you exploded over something small (but actually not small at all)?

Why do we keep explaining... and explaining... and explaining — and still walk away feeling misunderstood (and kind of embarrassed)?

You're the go-to girl at work, the one who gets it DONE… but when it comes to your relationship? Cue the overthinking, second-guessing, and constant need for reassurance.

Are you overthinking every convo, second-guessing yourself constantly, and wondering... “Am I triggered or am I actually right?”

This week, we're getting real about the messy middle — where you logically know you're in a good relationship but emotionally still feel anxious AF. If you're constantly asking: “Why isn't this enough?” “Why do I still feel so unsure?” “Why can't I just be chill for once?!” Then this episode is your exact starting point.

Welcome to the episode every anxious attachment girlie needs in her back pocket. If you spiral when they don't text back, replay convos 14 times in your head, or wake up with an emotional hangover worse than a tequila bender… this one's for you.

Let's be real: you're the hyper-independent girlie who gets ish DONE. You've got the degree, the business, the receipts. But when it comes to relationships? Your anxious attachment is quietly (or not so quietly) throwing hands in the background.

In this episode, I'm breaking down the biggest mistakes I see when people try to “fix” their anxious attachment triggers—and why those habits might actually be keeping you stuck in the same cycle.

Imagine going from spiraling over “Do they really like me?” to casually ring shopping like it's no big deal.

Feel like you're the one keeping the relationship alive?

STOP DOING ALL THE WORK IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP

This week I'm joined by Dr. Jeanine Staples-Dixon, a literal genius, tenured professor at Penn State, and someone who knows why you keep self-sabotaging in love. We're breaking down:

If you're anxiously attached and dating an avoidant, you already know this relationship is basically an extreme sport. One minute, you're feeling all the love; the next, you're staring at your phone wondering why they haven't texted back for seven hours (… or seven days

Okay, real talk—are you actually pushing away someone great, or do you just keep attracting emotionally unavailable people? Because SAME. Been there, lived it, wrote the metaphorical book. This week, we're getting deep into:

✨ Hey girlies, welcome to SEASON 2 of the BeThatHealingGirl Podcast! ✨ We're leveling up big time—new vibes, new content, and SO many juicy convos ahead. Today, we're diving into something we all know too well: the push-pull dynamic in relationships. You know, when things feel AMAZING one moment and like a dumpster fire the next? Been there. Let's break it all the way down. Here's what we're getting into:

✨ It's 2025 and we're not carrying anxious attachment into this new era okay? Feeling stuck in the what ifs and putting your life on hold for someone else? Trust me, I've been there. In this special year-end episode, we're diving into how anxious attachment has been holding you back from living your best life—and, more importantly, how to leave it behind as we step into the new year.

✨ It's New Year's Eve, and we're not carrying anxious attachment into 2025, okay? Feeling stuck in the what ifs and putting your life on hold for someone else? Trust me, I've been there. In this special year-end episode, we're diving into how anxious attachment has been holding you back from living your best life—and, more importantly, how to leave it behind as we step into the new year.

In this episode I'm breaking down why pretending you're totally fine when you're actually spiraling inside is keeping you stuck.

So you asked for the reassurance. You got it. And... you're still spiraling. WTF, right?

Ever sent a 3-page text knowing you shouldn't? Or started a fight just because you couldn't scratch that itch? Yep, we're going there. If overthinking has you spiraling like Alice down the rabbit hole (been there!), this episode is for you. We're diving deep into the dos and don'ts of breaking free from the overthinking cycle so you can step back from the mental cliff and find peace. I'll be breaking down exactly what's not helping you stop overthinking (hello, distractions, numbing, and Pink Elephant syndrome