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Preoccupied attachment partners think their avoidant partners are BETTER than they are considered to be by others, in terms of looks, intelligence, and mental health. Avoidant partners think that their preoccupied attachment partners are WORSE than they are considered by others. This judgement exacerbates the superiority complex of the avoidant and the inferiority complex of the preoccupied. Here's the post I promised! Need to support to see: https://buymeacoffee.com/drpsychmom/great-book-detailing-sexual-obsessionJoin my awesome Midlife Women's Group here: drpsychmom.com/mwgTo get over 200 more episodes, most recently "Flexibility: The Most Important Quality In A Partner," subscribe here! https://creators.spotify.com/pod/show/drpsychmomshow/subscribe For my secret Facebook group, the "best money I've ever spent" according to numerous members: https://www.facebook.com/groups/drpsychmomFor coaching from DPM, visit https://www.drpsychmom.com/coaching/For therapy or coaching, contact us at https://www.bestlifebehavioralhealth.com/
In this shorter episode of The Noise of Life Podcast, Steve Hodgson and Jason Seeman explore a relationship challenge many modern couples experience but rarely articulate - emotional disconnection in marriage and long-term partnerships.We unpack the “quiet drift” that happens not because love disappears, but because connection stops being intentional. Modern life pulls couples into parenting responsibilities, work pressure, digital distraction, and endless logistics. Families eat in separate rooms. Partners scroll on their phones in bed. Communication becomes transactional rather than relational. And slowly, emotional intimacy in relationships begins to fade.Jason shares practical relationship tools to restore connection, including structured check-ins that prioritise emotional safety, active listening, and presence. Not fixing. Not defending. Not problem-solving. Just listening with intention. We discuss why healthy communication in marriage is a skill, not a personality trait - and why many couples were never taught how to regulate emotion during conflict.This episode also addresses intimacy in relationships, reframing physical closeness not as obligation or performance, but as a pathway back to emotional union and connection. We explore how unresolved stress, cognitive load imbalance, and unspoken resentment impact both emotional and physical intimacy.Importantly, this conversation reframes conflict in relationships as normal and necessary for growth. The true danger isn't disagreement — it's emotional withdrawal, avoidance, and silent tension becoming the environment children grow up observing.If you feel like you and your partner are on the same team but no longer deeply connected, this episode offers practical relationship advice, emotional awareness strategies, and grounded tools to help rebuild intimacy, strengthen communication, and restore partnership alignment.Because connection doesn't disappear overnight. It drifts quietly — until someone becomes intentional again.Inside this podcast:Why connection must be intentional in modern relationshipsHow daily logistics quietly replace emotional intimacyThe power of structured check ins for couplesWhy intimacy deepens emotional connectionWhy conflict is normal but disconnection is dangerousConnect with Jason:Linktree → https://bio.site/raisingfathers Website → https://www.raising-fathers.com/Connect with Steve:Instagram → https://bit.ly/3KARQhR LinkedIn → https://bit.ly/48sw8Vj Episode Highlights00:00:00 - Every relationship is unique and tools must fit context00:01:30 - Creating space for real human connection00:02:30 - Families drifting into separate worlds00:03:10 - The power of structured check ins00:04:00 - Listening without fixing or defending00:05:00 - Logistics versus emotional intimacy00:06:00 - Feeling like a team again00:07:00 - Why intimacy changes the emotional atmosphere00:10:00 - Conflict as a feature, not a flaw00:11:00 - Avoidant attachment and retreating from feedback00:12:00 - Self compassion as the foundation of repair00:13:00 - Children absorbing the emotional tone of parents00:13:50 - Repairing faster and breaking cyclesABOUT THE PODCAST SHOWThe Noise of Life is a podcast that shares real stories, raw truths, and remarkable growth. Hosted by Steve Hodgson a coach, facilitator, speaker, and Mental Health First Aid Instructor. This podcast dives deep into the “noise” we all face, the distractions, doubts and challenges that can pull us away from who we truly are.
Are you truly waiting on God — or are you avoiding obedience because it feels uncomfortable? If you've been wondering how to know God's will, how to hear God's voice clearly, or whether you're delaying because of fear, this message is for you. James 2:17 says, "Faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead." In this episode of Chosen By Jesus with Kelley and Taylor Tyan — ranked in the Top 1% of Christian podcasts worldwide and reaching 21 countries — we unpack what waiting on God really means and how faith in action requires obedience before comfort. By God's grace, this community has grown to: • 109,000+ views • 940+ hours watched • Viewers in 21 countries • 57,000+ views in the United States In uncertain times — from personal hardship to global conflict — many believers struggle with trusting God in uncertain times and stepping out in faith. But biblical faith has never required perfect conditions. It requires movement. This Bible-based teaching covers: • Waiting on God vs. avoiding obedience • Faith without works explained (James 2:17) • How to step out in faith when you feel afraid • Overcoming fear biblically • Christian obedience in real life • Hearing God's voice and responding with courage Sometimes fear disguises itself as spiritual wisdom. Sometimes delay looks like discernment. But obedient waiting produces peace. Avoidant waiting produces excuses. ⸻ Reflection: • Has God already spoken? • Am I asking for clarity when I really want certainty? • If fear wasn't involved, what would I do next? You don't need another confirmation. You need courage. ⸻ Scriptures: James 2:17 Ecclesiastes 11:4 ⸻ Prayer: Lord, give us discernment to know when You are asking us to wait — and courage when You are asking us to move. Where we've delayed obedience, strengthen us. Teach us faith in action and help us choose obedience over comfort. In Jesus' name, Amen. ⸻ Comment below: Has God already told you what to do? ⸻ CALL TO ACTION Subscribe for weekly faith-filled conversations Like this video if it encouraged you Share with someone who's waiting but still believing Comment below—we pray over every request ⸻ABOUT CHOSEN BY JESUS Chosen By Jesus is a Top 1.5% Christian podcast worldwide, streamed in 16+ countries, with 725+ hours of YouTube watch time and a growing global community seeking biblical wisdom, peace, and encouragement. ⸻ One Year. 12 In-Person Gatherings. Endless Encouragement. Step into a sisterhood of women who pray together, grow together, and rise together. What You'll Experience: • A safe place to grow in faith, be encouraged, and empowered • Accountability & support to stay strong all year long • Prayer, worship & fellowship that soothe your soul Monthly Meet-Ups: 3rd Wednesday of every month at 6:30 PM The Wellness Way – Shrewsbury, MA Come as you are — leave inspired and equipped to live boldly for Jesus. Only $200 for the entire year (that's just $16/month for faith, growth & sisterhood!) Join the Chosen By Jesus Community today: https://kelleytyan.com/cbjcommunity ⸻ Want to go deeper? We coach women who are ready to rise in faith, walk in identity, and stand strong no matter the season. DM us on Instagram or visit www.chosenbyjesus.com ⸻
It can be a challenge to open up to a partner who frequently struggles with being in-tune with emotions. In this episode, we talk about ways to connect with your avoidant partner. Check us out on YouTube: Coach Craig KennethGet Craig's help personally: https://www.askcraig.net/take-action/Get Victoria's help: https://www.askcraig.net/victoriaCraig's workbook series: https://www.askcraig.net/workbooks-1/Get Started on the Creative Healing Course: https://courses.askcraig.net/
Are they "scared" of intimacy, or are they "managing" you?It's the question that keeps thousands of people stuck in toxic cycles. You see them pulling away, shutting down, and becoming cold—but is it because they have an Avoidant Attachment Style or is it Narcissistic Devaluation?All My Links (Coaching, Courses, Merch): https://link.me/mentalhealnessAs a self-aware narcissist, I'm breaking down the nuances that therapists often miss. I'm explaining the difference between the "Avoidant's Fear" and the "Narcissist's Control." If you treat a narcissist like an avoidant, you will end up destroyed. If you treat an avoidant like a narcissist, you'll miss the chance for a healthy boundary.Connect with Lee:My Courses: https://courses.mentalhealness.net 1-on-1 Coaching Calls: https://link.me/mentalhealnessAll My Link: https://beacons.page/mentalhealness Follow on Instagram/TikTok: @mentalhealnesssIf this episode helped you gain clarity, please leave a 5-star review on Spotify! It helps others find the validation they need to heal.
Avoidant attachment isn't one category. Dismissive and fearful avoidant patterns respond very differently in conflict, and using the wrong repair strategy can make things worse. If one of you demands calm and the other escalates to be heard, this episode is for you. Kim covers the real issue beneath tone, intensity, and shutdown: distress tolerance. Timestamps: 00:00 When Only One Emotional Tone Is Allowed 00:55 This Isn't Incompatibility. It's Capacity. 03:01 What Attachment Theory Is (And Isn't) 05:28 Dismissive vs Fearful Avoidant: The Critical Difference 08:06 Why Repair Depends on the Pattern 09:15 "I Just Want Calm" vs "I Just Want to Be Heard" 11:28 Is Wanting Calm Unreasonable? 12:34 Boundary vs Emotional Control 14:38 The Real Issue: Distress Tolerance 15:03 Why Insight Isn't Enough 17:35 Reps for Anxious Preoccupied Patterns 18:15 Reps for Dismissive Avoidant Patterns 19:05 Reps for Fearful Avoidant Patterns 20:39 Why Skill Requires Practice 21:05 Join The Practice If you're serious about widening your emotional lane instead of having the same fight again next week, The Practice is opening soon. Comment Waitlist to be sent the registration link.
Why Avoidant People Sabotage Their Best RelationshipsEcho opens up about her avoidant attachment style and how she'd convince herself relationships were doomed at the first sign of conflict. John shares how he helped her break these self-destructive patterns by creating a safe space for real communication.This episode dives deep into avoidant attachment - the tendency to shut down, run away, or sabotage relationships when things get too intimate. Learn why "I lost myself" and "they'd be better off without me" are red flags, how childhood shapes these patterns, and most importantly, how to break free from the cycle of pushing away the people you actually want close.In This EpisodeAvoidant people self-sabotage by looking for proof their partner will disappoint themThe perfectionism trap: expecting yourself and your partner to never make mistakesWhy avoidants struggle with trust - they don't communicate, then resent their partner for not mind-reading"Independence" is often just avoidance in disguiseYou can't solve relationship problems alone in your headCreating safety means being non-reactive when your partner opens upSpeaking your truth (even when it's scary) builds real trustNot taking things personally is the key to breaking avoidant patternsTimestamps0:00 — Avoidant Attachment: What It Looks Like0:44 — Welcome & Introduction to Attachment Theory2:36 — Attachment Styles Are Models, Not Your Identity4:04 — The Anxious-Avoidant Trap in Relationships7:14 — How Avoidant People Self-Sabotage Love9:56 — The Fear of Betrayal and Not Trusting Yourself13:26 — Why Men Must Recognize Their Avoidant Patterns19:00 — Building Resentment in Silence Then Blowing Up24:28 — The Key to Becoming Secure: Self-Confidence28:52 — How Avoidant People Try to Earn Love Through Perfection36:24 — Raising Secure Children: Breaking the Cycle44:52 — Confusing Independence With Avoidance48:06 — How to Help an Avoidant Partner Feel Safe57:58 — Setting Boundaries With Love, Not Punishment63:42 — The Courage to Be Disliked and Speak Your TruthConnect
In this episode, Elena Armijo explores the value of conflict with executive and leadership coach Mark Hunter, founder of Pinnacle Coaching and author of The Brink: How Great Leadership Is Invented. With three decades of coaching experience, Mark brings a grounded, practical lens to one of the most misunderstood leadership skills: learning to work with conflict instead of avoiding it. Check out Elena's website to learn more about how she can support you in seeing and using the power that resides within you. Elena opens with a coaching reflection that reframes conflict as a signal, not a failure. When teams treat tension as data, they gain access to what is often left unspoken, including unmet needs, misalignment, and values trying to surface. She also unpacks generative conflict as a capacity builder, an essential ingredient for innovation, trust, and cultural clarity. With clarity and deep care for teams, Mark reframes conflict as a powerful leadership tool, especially inside executive teams where roles are designed to hold healthy tension in service of better outcomes. He introduces generative conflict as purposeful disagreement aimed at optimizing a shared goal rather than protecting ego. He outlines a grounded yet disciplined approach: start where the team is, understand how conflict currently operates through a listening tour, define what healthy conflict looks like, and name the willingness required to practice it consistently. Elena and Mark examine the somatic dimension of conflict. Drawing from decades of leadership and team development work, Mark makes a compelling case that avoidance is often the true source of nervous system strain. When conflict is vilified or suppressed, tension accumulates beneath the surface. In contrast, when conflict is normalized and practiced with skill, it becomes regulating, steadying, and even energizing for a team. This conversation invites leaders to build cultures grounded in trust rather than control, to replace reactivity with curiosity, and to cultivate the capacity to fight alongside each other in service of something greater than ego. Let's Get Social! Want to hear more from Elena? Click here! Learn more about The C-Suite Collective Connect with Elena on LinkedIn Mark Hunter: LinkedIn | Website This podcast was produced by the following amazing team: Ulrich Wolvaardt, Audio Engineer Aaron Boykin, Musician & Artist (Get updates about Aaron's music via Instagram) Jo van Eeden, Project Manager
Gimana ya kalau si avoidant attachment dan anxious attachment yang sifatnya bertolak belakang ini ketemu? DUHHHHH PASTIIII Menarik banget! Di episode "Talk A Talk" kali ini, Tiara dan Fay bakal bahas sisi menarik dari tipe kedekatan dalam sebuah hubungan. Kira-kira kamu termasuk tipe kedekatan yang mana? Penyiar: Tiara & FayOperator: Alif Editor: Nadine Music director: Faiz
In this episode, Dr. K provides a deep-dive lecture into Attachment Theory, moving beyond individual psychology to explore how our internal "wiring" creates the specific dynamics of our romantic relationships. He breaks down why we are often attracted to the very people who trigger our deepest insecurities and provides a scientific roadmap for healing your attachment style. What to expect in this episode: • The Three Major Styles: A breakdown of why 50% of people are Secure, while the rest fall into Anxious (fear of abandonment) or Avoidant (fear of closeness) patterns rooted in childhood experiences. • The "Match Made in Hell": An analysis of the magnetic attraction between anxious and avoidant individuals, creating a cycle where one person chases while the other retreats. • The Six Types of Love: How ancient Greek concepts like Ludus (game-playing) and Mania (obsessive) perfectly describe the modern behaviors of avoidant and anxious partners. • Protest Behaviors and Mixed Signals: A look at the "chameleon" effect in anxious individuals and the "devaluing" strategies avoidants use to keep people at arm's length. • The Path to Security: Practical tools for moving toward a Secure Attachment, including the development of mentalization (understanding your partner's mind) and inter-subjectivity (blending lives without losing your identity).HG Coaching : https://bit.ly/46bIkdo Dr. K's Guide to Mental Health: https://bit.ly/44z3SztHG Memberships : https://bit.ly/3TNoMVf Products & Services : https://bit.ly/44kz7x0 HealthyGamer.GG: https://bit.ly/3ZOopgQ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
In this episode, we're unpacking Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA) - It's the “the second it becomes a have to, my brain says hell no” feeling, you might experience… I can decide myself to clean the kitchen & feel fine. But if my partner asks me, suddenly it's a whole thing!We'll chat about:What PDA is & how it's driven by anxiety & a need for autonomy, not laziness or being difficult.How PDA can show up in adults with ADHD, from ignoring texts to melting down over “simple” tasksWhy your nervous system treats everyday demands like threats, even when they're self-care or funThe key difference between PDA & ODD (and how the why behind behaviour matters)3 Practical ways to make demands feel smaller & safer, increase your sense of choice,& support your nervous system instead of bullying yourself into actionIf you've ever wondered, “Why do I fight even the things I want to do?”, this episode is for you my friend.LINKS TO GOOD SH*T:*Join Adulting with ADHD your ADHD toolbox & everything you need to work with your brain*Get our ADHD Coach in your pocket! + the ADHD Goal Setting Workbook (life planner tool)*12 Things I wished my Doctor had told me about Adult ADHD*Find out if you might be living with ADHD - Download Symptoms List*Check out Courses & Coaching with Xena*Learn, Inspire, Share & Connect inside our Facebook Community *Come hang out with me on Instagram!
In this episode I talk with our coach Donna Georgen - parent of PDA 28- and 21-year-olds - about her top tips for parenting PDA teens.This is the second of two episodes in which Donna and I discussed this topic. In the first episode we covered five of her tips, and in this episode we cover five more.Here they are:Reflect on successNormalize discomfort and fearLet go of future fearsPause social media as neededBreathe -- you're doing great!I hope you find our conversation helpful!PS - Want to work with Donna to move your family forward? She offers private coaching that you can learn all about here.
In this Ask Steph episode, we explore one of the most common (and understandable) questions in anxious–avoidant dynamics: what actually helps an avoidant partner feel safe enough to open up emotionally?If you tend toward anxious attachment, it can feel deeply unsettling to sense that parts of your partner's inner world are closed off to you. That can create a strong pull to try harder, ask more questions, or push for emotional access — often with the hope that if they open up, it will mean you're finally “enough.”In this episode, we unpack why that instinct can backfire, and what genuinely supports emotional safety instead.
They act like they are over you the moment you breakup and that is crushing. But is that what they really feel? There is a lot of "experts" on what avoidant attached person feel during breakups. I have on average 70 avoidant attached people on speed dial and I am sharing what they all say they go through during breakups. It's astounding how they all have the same breakup story. Leave a comment and let me know your thoughts on this podcast. Much love, AnnalisaI would love to hear your thoughts on this episode. Support the show
In this episode I talk with our coach Donna Georgen - parent of PDA 28- and 21-year-olds - about her top tips for parenting PDA teens. We cover five of her tips in this episode and will release another episode soon with five more. Here's the first five:Try to keep autonomy and equality at the forefrontShift from parent to mentor-friendBe vulnerable and transparentRelease the pressure to figure it all outRedefine regressionI hope you find our conversation helpful!PS - Want to work with Donna to move your family forward? She offers private coaching that you can learn all about here.
If selling feels uncomfortable, draining, or easy to avoid, this episode may shift everything for you. In this episode, Cait breaks down how avoidant attachment commonly appears in the sales process, from deprioritizing money-making activities to ghosting leads who didn't immediately say yes. She explains why avoiding sales doesn't keep you safe. It actually disconnects you from your mission, your community, and the impact you're here to make. Most importantly, she offers a grounded, practical reframe for healing this pattern: prioritizing sales as a daily, embodied practice, not a performance. Tune in to hear: What avoidant attachment looks like in sales and business How avoidance shows up as "not showing up" (subtly and overtly) Why sales activities often fall to the bottom of your to-do list How fear of rejection fuels follow-up avoidance Why sales are the lifeblood of your business (and your mission) Simple ways to re-center needle-moving sales actions in your daily flow How healing avoidance creates more safety, consistency, and cash flow If this episode resonates with you, don't forget to share it to your stories and tag @themillionairemother, or leave a 5-star rating and review on Apple Podcasts-it helps more mamas find this show.
365. Overwhelmed and Stuck in Survival Mode? Try This 1-Week Reset to Feel Like Yourself Again. | Overwhelm, Organized, Routines, Schedules, Time Management, Time Blocking, Home Systems, Self Care, Planning, Task Management, High Achieving, Moms, Habits, Goals, Successful, Homemaking365. Overwhelmed and Stuck in Survival Mode? Try This 1-Week Reset to Feel Like Yourself Again. Do you ever feel like your brain has 37 tabs open… and you can't find where the music is coming from?You're answering school emails.Coordinating rides.Making dinner decisions.Managing work.Responding to texts.Remembering appointments.Carrying the emotional temperature of the whole house.And somewhere in the middle of all of that…you quietly think:“I just want everything to stop for a minute.”If that's you — this episode is your permission slip.Not to quit.Not to disappear.Not to overhaul your entire life.But to stabilize.Because what you're feeling isn't laziness.It isn't disorganization.It isn't a lack of discipline.It's DECISION FATIGUE.And it's draining you.It's time to implement my:1-Week Stabilize the System Plan Using the Thrive MethodIn this episode, I walk you through a gentle but powerful 1-Week “Stabilize the System” Reset mapped directly from my Thrive Method — so you can move from survival mode back to maintenance (and eventually thriving) without adding more to your plate.This is not a “do more” episode.It's a:simplifystandardizedelegateprotect your brainbreathe againepisode.Especially in February — when winter feels long, energy feels low, and the mental load feels heavy — this reset will help you reduce decisions, calm your nervous system, and create steadiness again.In This Episode We Talk About:✔ Why decision fatigue is silently draining moms✔ Why you feel worse at night (and it's not your fault)✔ How to reduce daily decisions immediately✔ A 1-week stabilization plan inside each Thrive category:TH R I V E You don't need a life overhaul.You need fewer choices.And this episode shows you exactly how to create breathing room again — without dropping the ball on your family.If You've Been Feeling…• Frazzled and scattered• Snappy by evening• Avoidant of simple tasks• Mentally exhausted• Like you “should be able to handle this” but can'tPlease hear me:You are not failing.You are overloaded.And there is a difference.This Episode Will Help You:✨ Lower the mental noise✨ Create stability in one week✨ Feel steady instead of spiraling✨ Move from survival to maintenance mode✨ Protect your energy instead of burning it outYou are a high-capacity woman.But high-capacity women burn out quietly.This week, we don't push harder.We STABILIZE THE SYSTEM.Hit play, take a deep breath, and let's build steadiness again — together.
Why is it so hard to say “no”? In Week 2, we move from where your boundaries are to why they formed that way. Coach Kaila guides you through a compassionate exploration of your “Origin Story,” looking at the family rules and survival strategies that shaped your current behaviors. In this episode, we explore: The Blueprint: How your attachment style (Anxious or Avoidant) creates your boundary script. The “Good Child” Contract: Understanding the silent agreement we made to trade our authenticity for safety. Strategic Compliance: A powerful reframe for the disability community—learning when “people-pleasing” is actually a wise safety strategy vs. an unconscious fawn response. The Practice: How to use “The Pause” to break automatic patterns. Connect with Coach Kaila: Visit our website for more resources: Creative Guidance LLC If this episode resonated with you, consider Supporting the show: Buy Me a Coffee
In this episode, we talk about when someone with an avoidant attachment style gets more space than they are comfortable with and start to believe that they've lost you. Check us out on YouTube: Coach Craig KennethGet Craig's help personally: https://www.askcraig.net/take-action/Get Victoria's help: https://www.askcraig.net/victoriaCraig's workbook series: https://www.askcraig.net/workbooks-1/Get Started on the Creative Healing Course: https://courses.askcraig.net/
When they start dating an avoidant partner, many people are still very close to a friend that fulfills their emotional or intellectual needs, who they flirt with (if they are honest). When the main relationship with the avoidant becomes more serious, like engagement or marriage, they end the friendship bc they want to engage fully in the relationship. Unfortunately, this is when it becomes obvious that the avoidant partner is not really someone who can meet their full emotional needs, and was only sufficient as part of an emotional harem. If you're in this situation, it is only a matter of time before you start questioning whether you can remain lonely in your marriage forever. This can also happen with same sex friends or even family! All this in today's episode.Join my awesome Midlife Women's Group here: drpsychmom.com/mwgTo get over 200 more episodes, most recently "There's a Time And A Place For Romance... And You Will Alienate Your Partner If You Don't Recognize This," subscribe here! https://creators.spotify.com/pod/show/drpsychmomshow/subscribe For my secret Facebook group, the "best money I've ever spent" according to numerous members: https://www.facebook.com/groups/drpsychmomFor coaching from DPM, visit https://www.drpsychmom.com/coaching/For therapy or coaching, contact us at https://www.bestlifebehavioralhealth.com/
Send a textI'm joined by my friend Pontus for an honest conversation about the pattern many people label “avoidant”—the push–pull between longing for connection and needing space. If you're the one pulling away, or if you're on the receiving end of someone creating distance, this episode offers a rare, compassionate look behind the curtain.Pontus shares what it's like when the body says no and the mind rushes in to build a case: “They're not right,” “I'm broken,” “This will never work.” Together, we slow it down and uncover what's underneath: the fear of an inner emotional experience—and the survival strategy of pulling away so you don't have to feel it.Related episodes:EP 192: 5 Signs of Insecure Attachment (And How to Use Them to Heal) EP 164: A different look at anxious and avoidant attachment Ready to revolutionize your relationship experience? Last spots for the 2026 power journeys:Spain April 12-18 (women) The online programs: Join Alchemy to heal emotional wounds and shift reactive patterns (one year of live calls, lifetime access to practices, €550) The Embodied Relationship Academy (ERA) - the yearlong mentorship with me into secure relating and leading from love (from €370/month) Let's grow into the relationship you always longed for, starting with falling in love with being YOU.
Get the Somatic Attachment Healing Course Free for Life When You Start Your 7‑Day Trial of the All-Access Pass. https://attachment.personaldevelopmentschool.com/somatic-attachment-healing?utm_source=podcast&utm_campaign=somatic-attachment-healing&utm_medium=organic&utm_content=pod-02-09-26&el=podcast If you keep feeling confused, disconnected, or emotionally shut out in relationships or you find yourself attracted to people who pull away when things get close, this episode is for you. Avoidant patterns aren't about not caring. They're about a nervous system that learned closeness wasn't safe. And that pattern can be healed.
Blocking an avoidant ex feels powerful - but it often does the opposite of what you want.Ex back strategist Lucia explains why blocking can quietly backfire with avoidant attachment, what it does to their nervous system and the new rule you need to understand before you decide whether to block or not.Get coaching!Download Silenzio App: iPhone OR AndroidRead No Contact Secrets BookSay Hi on Instagram#avoidantattachment #getexback #blockinganex
Episode TitleThe Attachment Style Quiz Your Therapist Would Give You (Part 2 of the Secure-Relationship Series)Episode DescriptionMost of what we do in relationships is on autopilot—shaped by how we were cared for (or not) as kids. In this episode, Sharla and Robert unpack the three main attachment styles (Secure, Anxious, and Avoidant), share eye-opening childhood reflection questions, real-life couple stories, and checklists to help you identify yourself. You'll finally understand why you chase, why they pull away, and how to stop using labels as weapons—so you can actually build the safety and closeness you both crave.Key TakeawaysYour attachment style isn't a flaw—it's an adaptation from childhood.Never weaponize labels (“You're so avoidant!”). Use them for compassion only.Secure relationships require: safety first, equal power, and the relationship that come first.The path to more security = Acceptance of who you both are + owning your impact.You can't force change in your partner. You create it through consistent safety.Quick Attachment Style Checklists (from the episode)Secure I enjoy closeness but am also comfortable alone. Disagreements don't shake me. I trust easily.Avoidant I recharge best alone. Closeness can feel smothering. I downplay emotions.Anxious I worry my partner will leave. I need frequent reassurance. Small things feel like big threats.Resources for Deeper LearningMust-Read BooksAttached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find—and Keep—Love by Amir Levine & Rachel Heller → The book that brought attachment theory into everyday relationships. Wired for Love by Stan Tatkin → Deep dive into how your partner's brain works and how to create real security together.The Power of Attachment by Diane Poole Heller → Excellent for understanding how early wounds show up now and how to heal them.Hold Me Tight by Sue Johnson → Seven conversations that can transform your relationship (Emotionally Focused Therapy classic).Next WeekWe start building that “invisible forcefield” around your relationship—specific tools to create safety and security even when your attachment styles clash.Call to Action!If this episode gave you an “aha!” moment, please leave us a 5-star rating and quick review—it really helps other couples find the show. Share this episode with your partner or a friend who's stuck in the chase-pullaway cycle. And subscribe so you don't miss Part 3!Thanks for listening — and remember: put each other first this week. The small things, done often, really do change everything. ❤️
In this mini but important episode, Christa tackles the most common, and most painful, dynamic in marriage: the anxious-avoidant pairing. If you've ever felt like you're constantly chasing your spouse for connection while they pull away, or if you feel overwhelmed by a partner who won't give you breathing room, this episode will help you understand why these attachment styles are magnetically drawn to each other and how the pursue-withdraw cycle keeps you stuck. In this intro episode, Christa gives practical steps each partner needs to take to break the cycle and move toward earned secure attachment. The key insight: Your Enneagram type is the engine, your attachment style is the steering, understanding both is where real change begins. Whether you're anxious, avoidant, or somewhere in between, this episode gives you language for what's happening and hope that change is possible. Listen right here or watch on YouTube! Need mental health tips in this time? Sign up for the FREE EnneaSummit here! https://www.tylerzach.com/mh26/enneasummit?ref=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.tylerzach.com%2Fa%2F2148228842%2FLS2nNmzL The Enneagram and Marriage Coaching & Certification Masterclass course begins again February 12, use code COACH for discount here or at https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/the-e-m-coaching-masterclass Find more about your type, the pod, freebies, and SO much more at our website right here! www.EnneagramandMarriage.com Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too here! Get Christa's Best-Selling Book, The Enneagram in Marriage, here! https://a.co/d/df8SxVx Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Hi lovers, it's officially love month, and leading into Valentine's Day, we're revisiting some of the most powerful relationship advice we've heard on the podcast, from 3 of the internet's top couples therapists and relationship experts.Whether you're single or in a long-term relationship, this episode is for you if you're grappling with an anxious or avoidant attachment, fear around intimacy/relationships, or learning how to regulate and rebuild during conflict.Thankfully, I've had the privilege of talking with the best when it comes to navigating love and partnership, which has helped me immeasurably in building the foundation of my own relationship. So today, I'm bringing you a roundup of the top advice from:❤️ Baya Voce, MSW, Relationship Repair Expert (Supervised by Esther Perez): The art of repair, and how to maintain love and connection through conflict. Baya's 4-step relationship repair framework, why curiosity is the antidote to defensiveness, and how to stay regulated during conflict. (Listen to our full episode here.)❤️ Trevor Hanson, Marriage & Family Therapist, Founder of The Art of Healing: Why fear is the #1 killer of relationships and how to communicate through it. Plus, how to navigate common communication “landmines” and how anxious & avoidant partners can build safe emotional intimacy. (Listen to our full episode here.)❤️ Jess Baum, Psychotherapist, Couples Counselor, & Author of Anxiously Attached: How our attachment styles are amplified or healed based on your relationship, breaking our anxious attachment patterns and prioritizing consistent love, recognizing red and green flags in chemistry, and moving from codependency to interdependence. (Listen to our full episode here.)Wherever you are in your relationship journey, know that you are loved! Sign up for our monthly adulting newsletter:teachmehowtoadult.ca/newsletter Follow us on the ‘gram:@teachmehowtoadultmedia@gillian.bernerFollow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadultSubscribe on YouTube
In this episode, Alix & Kayla unpack one of the most controversial queer takes on the internet: being attracted to women, sleeping with women, but not wanting to date or marry them. Is it preference, internalized homophobia, avoidance, or just honest self-awareness?Through listener submissions, they dive into WLW stereotypes, deal breakers, attachment styles, emotional intensity, codependency, and why queer relationships can feel so confronting. This episode is funny, nuanced, validating, and guaranteed to spark debate.00:00 – Intro: married, not related, very codependent02:00 – Listener love, sister wives & queer community updates06:00 – Deal breakers: kids, lying, cheating & location10:00 – Hygiene, finances & political differences16:05 – Topic intro: “I'm into women but wouldn't date one”17:10 – WLW stereotypes: neediness, codependency & you-hauling21:00 – Hookups vs dating & honesty vs leading people on25:20 – Intimacy, fear & emotional closeness with women29:50 – “Women are what I desire, men are what I tolerate”35:30 – Right person vs wrong person39:00 – Independence, merging lives & feeling suffocated44:00 – Avoidant attachment & relationship panic49:30 – Who's the Problem: toothbrush edition 56:30 – Final thoughts & listener call-to-action#WLWPodcast #QueerPodcast #LesbianPodcast #BiVisibility #WLWRelationships #QueerDating #AttachmentTheory #QueerDiscourse #WivesNotSisters #LGBTQPodcastConnect with us on social media: IG: @wivesnotsisterspod | TikTok: @wivesnotsisterspod | Youtube: @wivesnotsisterspod Follow our hosts on Instagram: @kaylalanielsen @alix_tucker You can also watch our episodes on Youtube at youtube.com/@wivesnotsisterspod!
Thank you to everyone who wrote in for this month's Oddvice Column
Healthy relationships require that we are open to being influenced. After all, what is a relationship if it doesn't include give and take. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Kaleb Beyer explains what both research and experience has taught him about the importance of accepting influence in relationships. Show notes: What does accepting relational influence mean? Allowing those we are in relationship with to shape and impact our thinking, feeling and behaving. What does not accepting relational influence look like? Relationship rigidity resulting in dismissing or being un-moved by the input, wisdom, experience and interaction of another individual. What does the research say? Husbands who accept influence from their wives tend to have happier and more satisfying relationships. The more influence a spouse is willing to accept, the more influential they can be. What makes accepting relational influence difficult? Being defensive or the tendency to recoil from perceived challenges. Black and white thinking or the tendency to see matters in either/or categories. Avoidant or the tendency to avoid relationship disagreement and friction. Misunderstood roles in relationship or the tendency to enter a relationship with a role modeled or taught to you that does not permit influence. Lack of relationship safety. What happens if we don't accept influence? The relationship tends towards disconnection. Does accepting influence mean finding agreement? Yes and no. Yes – you both agree that the other is worth understanding well enough to know when and how to yield to them. No – agreement is not the objective. In fact, disagreement is common and still should include influence. What does healthy influence look like amid disagreement? When a person says "no" in a relationship, they should simultaneously say "yes" to the friend or spouse they are in relationship with. By this we mean, those we are in relationship should always feel they have been understood and valued enough to have influenced us regardless of the decision at hand.
Get the Somatic Attachment Healing Course FREE for life when you start your 7-day trial of the All-Access Pass: https://attachment.personaldevelopmentschool.com/somatic-attachment-healing?utm_source=podcast&utm_campaign=somatic-attachment-healing&utm_medium=organic&utm_content=pod-01-30-26&el=podcast If you're caught in cycles of emotional pain, overthinking, or fear of getting close again, this episode will help you understand what's really happening beneath the surface, and how to start healing at the root. Episode Summary Breakups don't just hurt emotionally; they can activate deep attachment wounds that keep us stuck in fear, rumination, and self-doubt. In this episode, we explore why commitment can feel so threatening after heartbreak, how the subconscious mind enters “flaw-finding mode,” and why the boomerang effect can pull us back into unhealthy dynamics. You'll learn how to separate genuine feelings from fear-based reactions, why holding no contact is so powerful for healing, and how to begin rewriting old emotional stories so you can create secure, healthy relationships moving forward. Key Takeaways Why fear of commitment often intensifies after a breakup How to distinguish real feelings from subconscious fear responses What “flaw-finding mode” is and how it sabotages the connection The boomerang effect and why it keeps pulling you back Why holding no contact supports nervous system regulation How routines help rewire old attachment patterns Practical steps to heal emotionally and move forward with clarity Timestamps 00:00:00 – Intro 00:01:31 – A Fear of Commitment 00:02:40 – Feelings Minus Fears 00:04:31 – Flaw Finding Mode 00:05:56 – Boomerang Effect 00:08:50 – IAT Promo 00:09:43 – Hold No Contact 00:10:44 – Rewrite Our Old Stories 00:11:46 – Find a Routine 00:12:30 – Conclusion / How to Heal From a Breakup Meet the Host Thais Gibson is the founder of The Personal Development School and a world leader in attachment theory. With a Ph.D. and over a dozen certifications, she's helped more than 70,000 people reprogram their subconscious and build thriving relationships. Helpful Resources:
What happens when you've been in a long distance romance with an avoidant attached person and it feels intense even if you've just met a handful of times? You want answers...What is happening here? Can this be anything more? Why do they ghost me and return? As Sarah shares her stories, we try to find her answers that would soothe her troubles heart. I would love to hear your thoughts on this episode. Support the show
If you've ever been in a romantic relationship where one of you keeps reaching for closeness while the other pulls away just when things feel important, this episode is for you. If part of you feels like you're always chasing connection, or part of you feels like too much closeness makes you want to escape, you're not broken. You're likely in an anxious-avoidant dynamic. Anxious and avoidant partners don't randomly fall in love. This pairing is common for very specific psychological and nervous system reasons. Today I want to help you understand that pattern so you can stop personalizing what's happening and start seeing it clearly. This is Part One of a three-part series. Today is about naming the dynamic. The next two episodes will focus on how to love an anxious partner and how to love an avoidant partner without losing yourself.____________________________Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/anxious-avoidant-relationships Download Where Are You in the Anxious-Avoidant Cycle Right Now? It's a quick self-assessment to help you understand how you're showing up in your relationship when things get hard: https://abbymedcalf.com/anxious-avoidant-cycle-assessment Join my online community, One Love Collective, on Substack: https://abbymedcalf.com/substack. You'll get...✨ Early drops + ad-free podcast episodes✨ Worksheets, journal prompts, downloads, and guided visualizations✨ Community chats and live Q&A calls with Abby_________ Subscribe to the Love Letter and get my little messages each week! https://abbymedcalf.com/loveletter-opt-in/
Being patient with an avoidant doesn't save the connection - it often kills attraction.Dating expert Lucia explains why attraction fades when you're waiting, being understanding, and "not putting pressure on it". If you've been trying to stay calm and do the right thing while nothing changes, this episode is for you.#avoidantattachment #breakups #exback #nocontact #nocontactruleGet coaching!Download Silenzio App: iPhone OR AndroidRead No Contact Secrets BookSay hi on Instagram
Start Healing Your Attachment Style With Personalized Courses Taught by Thais Gibson. Free for 7 Days (Enough Time to Complete a Full Course). Limited-time Offer: https://attachment.personaldevelopmentschool.com/dream-life?utm_source=podcast&utm_campaign=7-day-trial&utm_medium=organic&utm_content=pod-01-21-26&el=podcast When someone won't commit, it can trigger anxiety, self-doubt, and the urge to chase or over-explain. But a securely attached person doesn't beg, pressure, or abandon themselves. They respond with clarity, boundaries, and self-trust, and that response changes everything.
Why does an absent or emotionally unavailable father affect your relationships as a man? In this episode, David breaks down how growing up without consistent masculine presence shapes attachment, emotional regulation, and intimacy in adult relationships. You'll learn how father absence leads to avoidance, hyper-independence, emotional shutdown, performance-based self-worth, and repeated dating patterns—including choosing emotionally unavailable partners and sabotaging healthy connection. This episode goes beyond psychology and dating advice. It's about responsibility, nervous system healing, masculine leadership, and doing the deep relational work required to create secure, grounded, and fulfilling relationships. Key Topics Covered: ⭐ The real impact of an absent or emotionally unavailable father ⭐ How father wounds shape attachment styles in men ⭐ Avoidant attachment, fear of intimacy, and emotional shutdown ⭐ Hyper-independence and distrust in relationships ⭐ Performance, success, and "never feeling good enough" ⭐ Shame cycles, conflict avoidance, and lack of repair ⭐ Why men choose unavailable partners ⭐ Repeating your father's patterns unconsciously ⭐ Difficulty receiving love and reassurance ⭐ Healing father wounds through relationship ⭐ Inner child work and masculine reparenting ⭐ Nervous system regulation and emotional capacity ⭐ Learning repair, leadership, and secure intimacy ➡️ Join the Waitlist "Relate" https://forms.gle/2AXhmyNweasETaso7 Connect With David – The Authentic Man: Instagram: / theauthenticman_ Website: https://www.theauthenticman.net/ For Coaching: hello@theauthenticman.net Newsletter: https://www.theauthenticman.net/home-subscribe
In this episode of Unfck Your Relationships, I break down what actually happens when an avoidant realises they've lost you and why this moment is so often misunderstood and romanticised. Avoidants don't experience breakups the same way anxious or secure people do. Instead of immediate grief, they often feel relief as the fear of closeness shuts off. It's only later when distractions stop working that the loss truly hits. I unpack the avoidant timeline, from the relief phase to the delayed grief, why breadcrumbing often follows, and why missing you does not automatically mean growth or emotional availability. This episode isn't about getting them back. It's about understanding the dynamic so you can stop waiting, stop self-abandoning, and start choosing secure love without needing someone else to realise your worth. WORK WITH MICHELLE: Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unf*ckwithable: https://michellepanning.com/the-connected-womanSign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): https://michellepanning.com/the-experienceCONNECT WITH MICHELLE:Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/michellepanningWebsite: http://www.michellepanning.com
For an anxious guy, nothing is more confusing than discovering that your avoidant, seemingly asexual wife was having an affair.No touching. No sex. Years of rejection.And yet… she was sleeping with someone else.I break down a real message from a man in a long-term dead bedroom who discovered his dismissive-avoidant wife had been cheating for years. We dig into anxious vs. avoidant attachment, why this dynamic is so common, and why the affair usually has nothing to do with you lacking masculinity, confidence, or sexual value.If you've ever wondered:“How could she want sex with him but not me?”“What does an avoidant partner actually want?”“Why counseling never seems to work with avoidant spouses?”“Was I just too needy or anxious?”…this video will make things click.We'll also talk about:Why “new” always beats “safe”Why anxious partners are usually the only ones willing to do the workWhy avoidant people struggle in long-term monogamyAnd why this pattern tends to repeat itself again and againIf you're dealing with a dead bedroom, infidelity, or the anxious–avoidant trap, you're not alone.
Trending with Timmerie - Catholic Principals applied to today's experiences.
Therapist Joseph Caruso joins Trending with Timmerie Episode Guide Withdrawing? Avoidant? Can’t handle Boredom? Recovering from repression and numbness. (1:30) How do we reach people who’ve replaced human relationships with AI chatbots? (26:19) Is it a bad habit to always want to watch something? (33:59) How do you deal with friends and extended family and confront them about their values? (39:41) A young man struggling with LGBTQ writes Timmerie a letter (42:30) Resources mentioned: Joseph Caruso https://cccsanjose.com/therapists/joseph-caruso Find a Therapist https://cpa.ce21.com/directory https://find.catholictherapists.com/ Irregular eating damaging fertility https://relevantradio.com/2025/11/irregular-eating-damaging-fertility/ Send Timmerie a question trending@relevantradio.com
In Episode 10, Kim opens Season Two by breaking down procrastination in a way most people have never heard it explained before. This episode isn't about productivity, discipline, or time management. It's about emotional risk, fragile self-esteem, and the identities we built in childhood to survive. Kim explains why procrastination shows up around the things that matter most. Big conversations. Creative work. Boundaries. Healing. Growth. And why avoidance isn't laziness. It's protection. Drawing from attachment theory, trauma, neurobiology, and her own lived experience, Kim connects procrastination to emotional attunement, identity, shutdown, people-pleasing, catastrophizing, and the fear of inner collapse. She also explains why insight alone doesn't change behavior, and what actually has to shift for real movement to happen. –––––––––––––––––– Time Stamps & Topics 00:00 – Rage, triggers, and decades of stored emotional memory 00:25 – Why feeling misunderstood cuts so deeply 00:52 – Procrastination isn't about time management 01:22 – Emotional risk vs practical difficulty 01:50 – Personal example: writing a first book 02:29 – Procrastination around hard conversations 03:01 – Mistakes, shame, and fragile self-esteem 03:59 – Inner collapse and identity threat 05:04 – Why systems learn to avoid emotional danger 05:28 – What self-esteem actually is (and isn't) 05:51 – Self-esteem as emotional resilience 06:25 – Emotional attunement explained 06:44 – Empathy vs shared experience 07:37 – Why "they'll never understand me" isn't true 08:10 – Childhood emotional neglect and minimization 09:14 – Avoidant coping and jumping to solutions 09:57 – Why being sat with matters 10:27 – Religion, conflict avoidance, and emotional bypassing 11:30 – Biology of trauma and implicit memory 12:33 – Adoption, abandonment, and cognitive bias 13:46 – Anger as a lifelong trigger 14:52 – Suppression vs expression of emotion 15:41 – Coping mechanisms and shutdown 16:24 – Anxious vs avoidant responses in conflict 17:09 – Self-esteem and "what happens when something goes wrong" 18:28 – Catastrophizing and control 19:13 – Why anxiety feels protective 20:00 – Avoidance as nervous system safety 21:25 – Silence, minimization, and relational procrastination 23:14 – Childhood roles: good child, peacemaker, achiever 24:38 – Survival strategies vs self-esteem 25:27 – Relational procrastination and suppressed anger 26:25 – Waiting until you're angry to speak 27:08 – Walking on eggshells and staying silent 28:02 – Triggers as accumulated implicit memory 29:12 – Why your partner isn't the whole cause 30:07 – Shutdown as self-protection, not punishment 31:05 – Why insight doesn't change behavior 31:56 – Awareness without emotional capacity 32:23 – Cognitive vs behavioral change 33:11 – Reframing hard conversations 33:56 – Procrastination in personal growth and healing 35:02 – Childhood identities and family roles 36:16 – How family freezes you in old identities 37:35 – Why growth feels threatening 38:05 – Holding competing emotions about parents 39:22 – Letting go of old identities 40:05 – Why growth feels risky, not empowering 41:18 – What actually reduces procrastination 41:46 – Emotional regulation and self-trust 42:09 – Questions to ask yourself about avoidance 43:16 – Tasks that carry emotional weight 43:44 – Identity disruption and behavior change 44:31 – Alcohol, belonging, and identity shifts 44:58 – Pay attention to what you avoid 45:26 – What avoidance is protecting –––––––––––––––––– This episode is especially relevant if you feel stuck despite insight, avoid hard conversations, or keep postponing the things that matter most to you. Kim's website: https://www.kimpolinder.com/ Kim's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kp_counseling/ Kim's YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@engineeringlovepodcast
Look out if you are dating someone with this mantra! You will always come fourth... and if they are dating after divorce with kids, you'll come fifth! Also: this appears to be the cultural moment of the avoidant! Why? Well, listen and find out.Join my awesome Midlife Women's Group here: drpsychmom.com/mwgTo get over 200 more episodes, most recent "Being With An Avoidant Partner Can Feel Like Eating Fake Food", subscribe here! https://creators.spotify.com/pod/show/drpsychmomshow/subscribe For my secret Facebook group, the "best money I've ever spent" according to numerous members: https://www.facebook.com/groups/drpsychmomFor coaching from DPM, visit https://www.drpsychmom.com/coaching/For therapy or coaching, contact us at https://www.bestlifebehavioralhealth.com/
Unlock Clarity, Healing, and Emotional Freedom This Boxing Week With Thais Gibson. Start Your Free 7-day Trial to the Personal Development School and get the Healing Family Dynamics Course ($250 Value) FREE for Life. https://attachment.personaldevelopmentschool.com/healing-family-dynamics-flashsale?utm_source=podcast&utm_campaign=healing-family-dynamics&utm_medium=organic&utm_term=K-OyK4c3FN0&utm_content=yt-12-26-25&el=podcast When someone you care about suddenly pulls away, it can feel terrifying and deeply confusing. You may find yourself asking: Are they discarding me… or is this just normal avoidant behavior? In this video, Thais Gibson breaks down the clear emotional, behavioral, and neurological signs that indicate whether a Dismissive Avoidant is preparing to discard and what you can do to protect your heart, stop self-blame, and respond from a grounded, empowered place. This video also walks you through practical steps to regulate emotional dysregulation, interrupt painful self-judgment patterns, and set boundaries that honor your needs, regardless of how the other person chooses to show up. In This Video, You'll Learn: The difference between normal avoidant distancing and an actual discard Early emotional shutdown and devaluing behaviors to watch for Why Dismissive Avoidants replace intimacy with “creature comforts” The neuroscience behind emotional dysregulation in relationships How cortisol and oxytocin impact connection, stress, and bonding Why self-judgment makes everything more painful and how to stop it How to use pattern interrupts and boundary-setting to protect yourself The biggest sign a Dismissive Avoidant may be pulling away Timestamps: 00:00 – Are They Discarding Me? 00:44 – 1. If You See Them Shutting Down Emotionally 01:44 – 2. If There Are Sudden Devaluing Behaviors or Comments 04:50 – Healing Family Dynamics Course Promo 05:48 – 3. They Replace Intimacy With Creature Comforts 07:05 – The Neuroscience Behind Emotional Dysregulation in Relationships 09:12 – Step 1: You Don't Need to Judge Yourself 10:58 – Step 2: Pattern Interrupt 13:49 – Ancient Wisdom on Self-Consideration 15:33 – 4. When They Stop Communicating 16:20 – Final Thoughts Meet the Host Thais Gibson is the founder of The Personal Development School and a world leader in attachment theory. With a Ph.D. and over a dozen certifications, she's helped more than 70,000 people reprogram their subconscious and build thriving relationships. Helpful Resources:
Avoidant restrictive food intake disorder (ARFID) is an eating disorder where people severely restrict food due to fear, sensory sensitivities, or low interest — not body image concerns — causing significant health and social problems Unlike normal picky eating, ARFID involves intense distress, extremely narrow food choices, nutritional deficiencies, weight loss, and serious disruption to daily life and social activities Prevalence ranges from 0.35% to 6.4% depending on region, primarily affecting children and teens, with average diagnosis at age 11 and higher male representation than other disorders Treatment approaches include parental control strategies, cognitive behavioral therapy, family-based treatment, food therapy, and sequential oral sensory methods to gradually reduce food-related fear and anxiety A specialized protocol combining psychology, hypnosis, and neuro-linguistic programming shows 90% success for adults and 65% for children, often achieved in single session
Avoidant restrictive food intake disorder (ARFID) is an eating disorder where people severely restrict food due to fear, sensory sensitivities, or low interest — not body image concerns — causing significant health and social problems Unlike normal picky eating, ARFID involves intense distress, extremely narrow food choices, nutritional deficiencies, weight loss, and serious disruption to daily life and social activities Prevalence ranges from 0.35% to 6.4% depending on region, primarily affecting children and teens, with average diagnosis at age 11 and higher male representation than other disorders Treatment approaches include parental control strategies, cognitive behavioral therapy, family-based treatment, food therapy, and sequential oral sensory methods to gradually reduce food-related fear and anxiety A specialized protocol combining psychology, hypnosis, and neuro-linguistic programming shows 90% success for adults and 65% for children, often achieved in single session
Thank you for joining us for our 2nd Cabral HouseCall of the weekend! I'm looking forward to sharing with you some of our community's questions that have come in over the past few weeks… Sophie: Hi Stephen, I really appreciate all that you do and I was hoping you would be able to give me some much needed guidance. I was diagnosed with ventricular tachycardia last year and the only explanation the consultant could provide was it was due to a tiny scar on my heart. I had a ultrasound & an MRI and the results were fine, and my heart was structurally sound. I have taken the big 5 and nothing was out of the ordinary apart from high cortisol at night and candida. I consequently completed the CBO last year. I am currently on beta blockers to control the fast/erratic heartbeats. These do not work all the time. The consultant said my only other option is for them to preform an AF abrasion. What are your thoughts on this procedure, as I really want to get off the beta Blockers and find a natural alternative to fixing my heart. I have heard you talk about how Enzymes are good for the heart, is there one in particular that would help or anything else I can try? I really do not want to have the abrasion or carry on with the BB and am desperate to find a natural solution to fixing my symptoms. I am taking omega 3, magnesium-complex, VD + K2, vitamin c, b-complex, hawthorn, zinc, coq10 & taurine, is there anything else I should be taking to help. When my symptoms are at there worst, I get a big rush to the head and black out for a few seconds, whilst shaking. I have a clean diet, and do not smoke and have cut out alcohol, coffee & sugar, as I find any stimulant does not help, including over exercising. Please help, any advise would be greatly appreciated. Anonymous: Hi Dr. Cabral! Over the last year my cycle has gone from 28 days to 23–24 days, and my PMS symptoms have gotten extreme—like night sweats, heavy emotions, breast tenderness, and migraines right before my period. I'm only 34, so perimenopause feels early. Could this be stress-related, estrogen dominance, or something deeper? Thank you for all you do! Sarah: Hello dr C! Curious if you're familiar with the eating disorder Avoidant Restrictive Food Intake Disorder (ARFID)? I suffered with it from the age of 2 until 20 - eating nothing other than 2 "safe" foods which were very processed. I'm now 29 and can happily say I no longer suffer with this ED after years of work and eat ALL the foods (all healthy, organic, wholefoods). I'm worried if having this ED for this length of time and during my developing years has permanently impacted my health, specifically my digestion and my gut microbiome. I've drastically changed my life around, have done a bunch of your testing and protocols but still dealing with some issues and curious if my past means i'll never be able to reach optimal health? How resilient is the body? David: Hello Dr. Cabral, appreciate your work and dedication. I've been experiencing persistent muscle twitches throughout my body for about six months. My doctor says magnesium levels look "normal," but I know that doesn't always tell the full story. Could this be related to electrolytes, stress, or a nervous system imbalance? Any suggestions on testing or protocols to help calm the twitches would be appreciated. Tommy: Hi Dr. C, I'm so frustrated. I had a gut issue for a long time and only the healthy belly product kept it at bay. Stool test showed citrabacter Freudi which I ran before I had the digestive issues. I did 2 para protocols, then the CBO, and dealt with frequent urination all the way through. By week 8, my bowells were much better and things had improved, however, I had to stop the protocol there as I couldn't handle the supplements at a lower dose. 2 weeks later I picked up a stomach bug, and since then I'm back to square one. I'm working on CBT because I have a lot of trauma and I believe that's why I've been so succeptible to stomach issues. I'm considering another stool test but the only issue is, what can I do about the result if I can't handle so many herbs and supplements I feel stuc Thank you for tuning into this weekend's Cabral HouseCalls and be sure to check back tomorrow for our Mindset & Motivation Monday show to get your week started off right! - - - Show Notes and Resources: StephenCabral.com/3607 - - - Get a FREE Copy of Dr. Cabral's Book: The Rain Barrel Effect - - - Join the Community & Get Your Questions Answered: CabralSupportGroup.com - - - Dr. Cabral's Most Popular At-Home Lab Tests: > Complete Minerals & Metals Test (Test for mineral imbalances & heavy metal toxicity) - - - > Complete Candida, Metabolic & Vitamins Test (Test for 75 biomarkers including yeast & bacterial gut overgrowth, as well as vitamin levels) - - - > Complete Stress, Mood & Metabolism Test (Discover your complete thyroid, adrenal, hormone, vitamin D & insulin levels) - - - > Complete Food Sensitivity Test (Find out your hidden food sensitivities) - - - > Complete Omega-3 & Inflammation Test (Discover your levels of inflammation related to your omega-6 to omega-3 levels) - - - Get Your Question Answered On An Upcoming HouseCall: StephenCabral.com/askcabral - - - Would You Take 30 Seconds To Rate & Review The Cabral Concept? 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Neuroscientist Chris Lee joins me to break down what's really happening in the brain when someone pulls away, shuts down, or spirals. We cover avoidance as a regulation strategy, why anxious activation hits so hard, and how state–story–strategy explains your patterns better than any TikTok soundbite. If you struggle with mixed signals, overthinking, or reacting fast in dating, this episode gives you clear, science-backed answers. We also get into emotional availability, communication during conflict, and how to create safety without overfunctioning. You'll learn how to recognize your patterns, rebuild trust in yourself, and stop taking someone else's regulation personally. Whether you're dating or partnered, this conversation helps you understand connection with far more clarity. Learn more: https://www.drchrislee.com/ If you're ready to slow down, trust your instincts, and break your old dating patterns, the Healthy Relationship Foundations Course walks you through it step-by-step HERE! Get Ad free HERE! Want to work with Sabrina? HERE! Get merch for The Sabrina Zohar Show HERE! Don't forget to follow Sabrina and The Sabrina Zohar Show on Instagram and Sabrina on TikTok! Video now available on YOUTUBE! Please support our sponsors! Go to AquaTru.com now for 20% off (your purifier) using promo code SABRINA. AquaTru even comes with a 30-day best-tasting water guarantee. Get 40% off your entire order at Lolablankets.com by using code SABRINA at checkout. Experience the world's #1 blanket with Lola Blankets. Head to DRINKAG1.com/ZOHAR to get a FREE Welcome Kit with an AG1 Flavor Sampler and a bottle of Vitamin D3 plus K2, when you first subscribe! Download Cash App Today: https://capl.onelink.me/vFut/mlzhc53l #CashAppPod As a Cash App partner, I may earn a commission when you sign up for a Cash App account. Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App's bank partner(s). Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC. Visit cash.app/legal/podcast for full disclosures. Disclaimer: The Sabrina Zohar Show, formerly known as Do The Work, is not affiliated with A.Z & associates LLC in any capacity.
A blindsided breakup with an avoidant partner leaves you reeling—one moment there's love and connection, the next, silence and confusion. Here's why they disappear the moment love takes hold. When the avoidant pulls away just as things feel real, it's not about you—it's about their fear of emotional closeness. Understanding this pattern is the key to freeing yourself from self-blame, reclaiming clarity, and finding peace after their sudden retreat. How Pace and Futurizing Fuel the Flame Why Avoidants Bail When Intimacy Appears How To Regain Power and Emotional Balance Reference to YouTube Live Show: Why People Pleasing Pushes Love Away- LIVE Q&A https://www.youtube.com/live/mE84gY2FfY8 Website: https://www.schoolofattraction.com Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/schoolofattraction Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/6SX9WKgEWynkxyulGhDihC?si=62449e8d26ac4ba2 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschoolofattraction/ Work with Me: Consultation: Books: Breakup Triage; The Cure for Heartache Audible Allowing Magnificence; Living the Expanded Version of Your Life - Book and Audiobook: Connect with Me! Website: susanwinter.net YouTube: YouTube Channel Instagram: Instagram Profile Twitter: Twitter Profile Facebook: Facebook Page LinkedIn: LinkedIn Profile TikTok: TikTok Profile
If you've ever found yourself Googling “How do I get an avoidant to choose me?” or “How do I make an emotionally unavailable person love me?” This episode is your wake-up call. I'm giving you the truth no one online seems to want to say out loud. You cannot “make” anyone love you… but you can understand the deeper wounds that keep pulling you toward emotionally unavailable partners in the first place. This episode is packed with real talk, compassion, and the exact mindset shift you need if you're tired of repeating the same painful relationship patterns.Inside the Episode:• Why you're drawn to avoidant partners and how old patterns keep recreating the same pain.• What's happening in your nervous system when you chase emotional unavailability.• How to show up securely with someone avoidant — matching energy, regulating yourself, and assessing their real capacity.If this episode hit home..if you heard yourself in these patterns, now is your time to break them. The Empowered.Secure.Loved Program is open for applications, and this is your LAST chance this year. We're closing applications at the end of December, and once it's closed, it's closed.And because this is truly the final chapter of the Empowered.Secure.Loved Program, we are doing something incredibly special as a heartfelt farewell. This is your last opportunity to step into this life-changing work before the doors close for good.
In this episode, I sit down with a former coaching client to unpack the all-too-common experience of losing yourself in a relationship, especially when you have an anxious attachment style.We talk about what happens when you prioritize your partner over your own needs, slowly sideline your friendships, and stay committed to someone whose words say one thing but whose actions say another. She shares her journey of loving the “nice” avoidant (the kind who isn't malicious, but deeply unavailable) and the painful uncertainty of realizing that even a kind partner may still be unable to meet your needs.Together, we explore how every relationship becomes a mirror for what you truly want, especially if you didn't grow up with healthy role models… and how stepping into secure attachment requires both courage and accountability.She also shares the tools that helped her rebuild her confidence, navigate singlehood with empowerment, and finally create a relationship with herself that feels trusting, grounded, and whole.Learn about 1:1 Attachment Coaching with Jessica here.
The Real Reason Men Shut Down, Pull Away, and Go Blank.Ever dated someone who was warm one minute… and emotionally shut down the next? In this week's Benson Book Club, we break down Chapter 7 of The Untethered Soul - “Transcending the Tendency to Close.”This chapter explains:why people emotionally close offwhy your ex suddenly went coldthe psychology behind emotional shutdown and avoidancehow to recognize when YOU close your heartand how this pattern destroys connectionI also give you a step-by-step Law of Detachment routine for heartbreak that I did to get over bookman!! The exact script to record, what to listen to every night, and a clean way to detach from someone who can't show up for you.If you want to understand why someone pulled away… or you need help letting go fast… this episode gives you clarity, strategy, and the tools to move on.Today's episode is brought to you by:Bellesa: EVERYONE who signs up wins a FREE WhisperVibeTM OR a FREE Rose toy with any WhisperTM order! CLAIM YOUR FREE GIFT HERE.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.