Those Who Can't Watch, Listen

Top o' the mornin' to ya! We're coming at you with a St. Patrick's Day episode in April, but you know what? The spirit of St. Patrick lives on all year long. Check out this episode to find out how Jennifer Aniston got her start as a bratty Valley girl as well as how Warwick Davis killed (literally) his role of the Leprechaun. Is this movie good? No. But was it worth the watch? Also no. JUST KIDDING. It was delightful. Thanks for listening! Or not!

Hello! Can you see us? It's time for another episode of "Those Who Can't Watch, Listen"! Elizabeth Moss plays the part of a terrified ex-girlfriend whose boyfriend may or may not be haunting her after his suicide. Or is he invisible? You'll have to listen (or not) to find out!!

Have you ever wondered if death was coming for you because you were supposed to die in a fiery plane crash? No? Just these late 90s/early 00s teens in this week's movie, "Final Destination"? Listen in to hear about the movie that scarred many of us elder millennials for life around things like bathtubs, train tracks, and bad art in a garage. Thanks for listening! (Or not!) 

GUESS WHAT! We got NEW MICS, and WOW, do we ever sound better. Tune in this week to hear us sound crisp and profesh talking about the Freaky Friday-esque horror movie "Freaky" starring Vince Vaughn and Kathryn Newton. Were you ever wondering, wow, what would it be like if a serial killer swapped bodies with a teenage girl? Then this is the movie for you! Thanks for listening (OR NOT!) 

WE'RE BAAAAAAAACK!! (Think of this as the quote from "The Poltergeist," episode 15 of this podcast if you need a reference.) Blah blah, we could lament why we haven't been posting podcast episodes, but we ALL know why. Life has just been TOO fun with Covid. Enjoy this episode of Kurt Russell's masterpiece - THE THING! 

Hola! We're coming at you today with a short but sweet-ish episode about a crying lady ("Llorando" in Spanish! Hence the title!) who killed her kids. YIKES. Listen in to see why she keeps cryin' after that. Thanks for listening! Or not!

We're back! Holiday break is finally over, and we have a new episode just in time for Bong Joon Ho's HISTORIC Oscar win. Is "Parasite" a horror movie? Depends on how you feel about rich people, I guess.  Thanks for listening! (Or not!)

Don’t “sleep” on this one, listeners-or-nots! Stephen King’s novel-turned-movie “Doctor Sleep” was a WINNER in both Angie AND Kelsey’s book(s). When you combine Ewan McGregor with some telepathy and old hotels, you have a great, spooky, heartfelt movie (with special thanks to the director, Mike Flanagan). Are you a kid who has special powers? Then WATCH OUT for Rose the Hat and listen to this episode to learn how to defeat her! Or just listen so you can have a quick lil summary of an amazing Stephen King adaptation. It might not be like the book really at all, but it sure is great.   Thanks for listening! Or not!

Listen (or not), we know it's not Halloween anymore. Life happens, time flies, all that jazz. But if you still want to hear about Jamie Lee Curtis' debut movie with Michael Myers (not THAT Michael Myers), then listen in even if it is post-Halloween. Do do do do (that's us singing the theme). Thanks for listening! (Or not!)

**Little bit of an audio issue in this and it got reposted -- sorry!** WHOA BABY, this week's episode is all about Mia Farrow's masterpiece (we refuse to acknowledge the RP name) "Rosemary's Baby." Angie had never seen it before, but MAN, what a treat. Listen in to hear about how one woman's weirdo neighbors gaslit her into thinking she was insane and definitely not living next door to a satanic cult! Kind of typical! Is Rosemary insane, tho? Maybe. Is the dad from "Beethoven" in this movie? Yes! Thanks for listening! (Or not!)  

Hi! Were you that girl in high school that everyone made fun of and threw tampons at you when you got your period in the gym shower? Then this movie's for YOU! Angie's future mother-in-law showed "Carrie" to her daughter as as lesson to "never be mean to people because you never know what could happen" and you know, we think she was right. No bullying, because you never know if someone has telekinesis and can start fires with her mind! Life lesson #451. Thanks for listening! (Or not!)

Hi! Are you jealous of everyone who seems to know everything about clowns, spiders, and red balloons? Then this episode is for you! Learn about Pennywise the Clown, his legacy (sort of), and the Losers Club. Get ready for IT CHAPTER TWO! With a small appearance by IT CHAPTER ONE! Was it called chapter one? Anyway, it's a recap of IT from 2017.  Thanks for listening! (Or not!)

Who wants a summary of the Scary(iest) Stories to Tell in the Dark? If you're like Angie, you read those books COVER TO COVER and even hid them under your bed because you were afraid the terrifying illustrations might come to life in the night, right? No, just her? Okay. Listen to see how terribly they transformed this PA town to the (sort of) 1960s and how they interpreted these short stories into something, well, less of a collection of short stories. Guillermo del Toro doesn't disappoint! (Well, maybe it's like 10% disappointing) Yay for quick summaries of horror movies! Thanks for listening! (Or not!)

Hello! We all know Mel Gibson is terrible, but honestly, let's just forget that for a good hour and hear about how everything's connected in M. Night Shyamalan's "Signs." It's a great movie and Angie might cry while retelling the story of Joaquin Phoenix, MG, Abigail Breslin, and Rory Culkin + aliens. Or are they aliens? (They're aliens.) Swing away, Merrill. Thanks for listening! (Or not!)

Hello, Clarice! That’s a line from this week’s movie, “The Silence of the Lambs” - which you most likely won’t learn from listening to this episode, so that’s *bonus content*. Have you wondered why everyone thinks this is the best movie ever? You should really just go watch it to hear all the goods about Hannibal Lector, Buffalo Bill, and Clarice Starling - but if you can’t watch, listen!   Thanks for listening! (Or not!)

We've all heard the superstition. WATCH YOUR BACKS, FRIDAY THE 13TH episode is here! If Angie was smart, she would've waited to do this movie on the actual Friday the 13th that is happening in September, but alas, you're getting it in August. On the 15th. So. You're welcome. Are you interested in campy (literally and figuratively) horror? Then this is the episode for you! Listen in to hear about Kevin Bacon's acting debut (maybe?) and get a synopsis of the first movie in a franchise that has grossed a grotesque amount of money. Thanks for listening! (Or not!)

Welcome to another episode of Those Who Can't Watch, Listen! This week we discuss Alfred Hitchcock's "Psycho." Norman Bates is no match for...well, his mother? Don't worry, we did the OG "Psycho" - no Vince Vaughn/Anne Heche action over here!  See ya at the Bates Motel! Thanks for listening! (Or not!) 

Helloooo! This week's episode is "The Cabin in the Woods"! Chris Hemsworth, Jesse Williams, the girl from "Firefly," the dad from "Step Brothers," the awful guy from "Billy Madison." What else do you need in a horror movie? Oh yeah, and it's written by Joss Whedon! Thanks for listening! (Or not!)

Hello! Are you ready for the horror movie of the summer? MIDSOMMAR! Join Kelsey and Angie for a journey to Sweden for a Summer Solstice festival gone wrong - or did it? (No, it definitely went very, very wrong.) We talk about Heaven's Gate, Chidi from "The Good Place," and horrific deaths in this episode. In addition, Ari Aster sure likes to show us (let us hear about, in this podcast's case) some naked people chanting, as well - so buckle up, listeners-or-nots! Thanks for listening! (Or not!) 

THEY'RE HERE. That's all you need to know. They're. Here. Also, don't build your house on top of an Indian Burial Ground.  Thanks for listening! Or not!

Hello, Listeners-or-Nots! We're back with a trip to the catacombs of Paris (appropriate after Angie's European trip)! We venture deep into Hell in the movie "As Above, So Below" - or do we? Listen in also for details about Kelsey and Angie's life recently, because we know that's the content you crave, or just FF a bit to get the "dirt" on the catacombs and the spooky shit that it contains. Thanks for listening! (Or not!)

Hallllooo, We're back with a SEQUEL EPISODE. Listen in to hear Angie realize she literally had never seen this movie before despite speaking about it very authoritatively in "The Conjuring" episode. Listen in MORE to hear Kelsey find it not as pleasant as she found "The Others". WE MISSED YOU, LISTENERS (OR NOT). THANKS FOR LISTENING (OR NOT)!

Hiiiiiiiieeee. Listen in today for a retelling of the plot of Nicole Kidman's "The Others" - a spooky movie set in post-war Europe. Who are these crazy ghosts haunting this mom and her two sunless kids? What do they want?? Why can they play the piano? Some of these questions will be answered, some will not. All we know is that Nicole Kidman is WONDERFUL. Big Little Lies season 2 soon, anyone? *Claps with Nicole's weird long fingers from the Oscars* (Look it up) Thanks for listening! (or not!)

Hellooooo!! If we could use ASL to sign these details to you, we would, because this week's episode is on "A Quiet Place." Listen in (or not) to hear Angie finally tell Kelsey about the brilliantly sound-edited movie about monsters who land on Earth in 2020 from a meteor and prey upon people who are noisy. (I know some coworkers who could use a little of this fear in their lives, amirite?) Anyway, John Krasinski and Emily Blunt are amazing and they're the most redeeming things in this movie. Thanks for listening! (Or not!)

HELLOOO and welcome to a new episode of Those Who Can't Watch, Listen, where Angie scares Kelsey with a thrilling retelling of "Us," Jordan Peele's new hit horror movie. Angie can't remember anyone's name in the movie, but she'll never forget Lupita Nyong'o and Winston Duke's chemistry. Listen in to hear how scarred Kelsey is by this particular horror movie and enjoy! Thanks for listening (or not)!

Howdy, listeners-or-nots! We're back, back again. Guess who's back? Kelsey and Angie are back with a new episode full of better audio (relatively speaking) and a new horror movie to gasp over. Did you see the split pea reference in last week's description? (Does anyone read these? Bueller?) Did you guess that this week would be THE EXORCIST? Well, paint me split pea green and call me Reagan! You're in for a wild ride this week. Thanks for listening! (Or not!)

Oh hi! We're back after a brief hiatus. BUT WITH A CATCH - this episode has some bad audio feedback, we don't know why. (It's ghosts.) So listen at your own discretion and hopefully we'll be back next week, enjoying split pea soup without our ears falling off from the feedback. Thanks for listening! (Or not.)

Episode lucky number 7 wasn't so lucky for Micah Sloat and Katie Featherston, stars of "Paranormal Activity" - the movie we cover this week on Those Who Can't Watch, Listen! Tune in this week to hear what horrors befall people who taunt demons in the nighttime. Is it real? Is it fake? You'll never know for sure*. Thanks to all our new listeners for throwing us those downloads and subscriptions - throw us a review while you're at it!  Thanks for listening! (Or not!)   *you'll find out in the first 5 minutes, this is a spoiler-full podcast, you should know that by now

For this week's episode, Kelsey and Angie went way back (WAY, way back) to high school to learn about the teenage slasher flick "I Know What You Did Last Summer." Join us as we relive the late 90s with Jennifer Love Hewitt, Sarah Michelle Gellar, Freddie Prinze Jr., and a super douchey Ryan Philippe. Does the movie hold up today? Listen and find out! BONUS CONTENT: Angie summarizes the inimitable "I Still Know What You Did Last Summer" at the end since it's not worthy of a full episode (sorry, Jennifer Love + Freddie Prinze + Jennifer Esposito). Thanks for listening! (Or not!)

We're back from our hiatus with a pop-culturally-relevant episode of Those Who Can't Watch, Listen. Have you been seeing all the dank memes your Twitter friends are posting about Netflix's buzzy "Bird Box" and want to know the 411? Fellow kids, look (and listen) no further than this week's episode.  Thanks for listening! (Or not!)

Merry Christmas, Listeners-or-nots! Angie and Kelsey dive into the mythological world of "Krampus" today for Christmas. What did you all think of that ending? Not the podcast ending, but the movie! Maybe the podcast ending is up for discussion as well. You tell us. Thanks for listening! (Or not!)

Episode 3 of "Those Who Can't Watch, Listen" is "The Conjuring" and Kelsey and Angie are a little drunk for it. Angie teaches Kelsey that not all exorcisms contain Emily Rose, and together they attempt to not slur their words while sipping amaretto liqueur. Thanks for listening! (Or not!)

Episode 2 is all about everyone's favorite teenage slasher film, "Scream" - this one gave Kelsey nightmares, so buckle up, scaredy-cats! Kelsey and Angie debate horror genres (aka read Wikipedia's listing of horror genres), talk about horror tropes, and geek out over all the 90s stars in this movie - all from the "comfort" of Angie's walk-in closet. Speaking of cats, Angie's cat Roary really voices her displeasure for the closet recording in this one.  Thanks for listening! (Or not!)

Welcome to "Those Who Can't Watch, Listen" - the podcast where one person who loves horror (that's Angie!) tells one who doesn't (that's Kelsey!) exactly what happens in all of pop culture's favorite horror movies. Do you hate watching horror movies but want to know what happens in them? This is the podcast for you!  Our first episode is about "The Shining." The audio might be a little wonky and so are the details, but we're getting our bearings. Thanks for listening. (Or not!)