The insecurity project

On today's episode, I've compiled the 10 most useful skills from the life-coaching world. 15 years ago, the life-coaching skillset was a missing technology in my tool kit for helping people grow and change and find effective solutions to their most painful problems. Although I was often privileged enough to be invited into people's lives to deal with their greatest challenges, in hindsight, my heart was always in the right place, but I definitely lacked the skills and tools to facilitate lasting change. Maybe you'll find these skill are a missing technology in your life too.I'm convinced that life-coaching skills (when used well) can only add value to your life and those around you, even if you have no intention of becoming a full-time professional coach. Over the last 15 years I've been a coach, here are my 10 favourite life-coaching skills that are applicable in any area of life, guaranteed to make you healthy, wealthy and wise.

On today's episode:Why you should buy more books that you're never going to read.Exactly why man's search for meaning is misplaced inside religion.How I finally accessed the creative magic inside me for the novel I'm writing. Why my most outlandish and important life goals are all back online again after losing them in a season of confusion and disappointment. And the only way to truly get the things you really want through the science of manifestation.

On Today's episode: The three things every person must do at least once in their lifetime,What to do with all the suffering in the world and why I still love Jerry Seinfeld,The latest iteration of my life purpose statement,Why drinking Elvis Juice on a rooftop bar in Vegas is always a good idea,My main regret after meeting a Leprechaun in a canyon bed hot-spring, And why it's much harder to become a bad person than most people imagine.

On today's episode:My lovely wife shares her personal development journey over the last 5 years and how the coaching space has helped her make key breakthroughs along the way. What makes this even more interesting is that I have been the one that has coached her. I've asked her to explain how we were able to have these critical coaching conversations without ruining our marriage.Katherine also talks about:How we separated the coaching conversations from the marriage onesThe importance of clean conversations, precise language and being clear about the frame before the conversation is had.The levels and layers of self awareness required to understand the dysfunctional patterns holding you back.And, why everyone needs a coach at some point in their life.

On today's episode:An update from my annual thinking week retreat,Why my golf game has drastically improved latelyAnd a detailed critique of why these 12 ‘truths' from therapy will not actually change anything. - Thoughts are not facts- Your past does not define your future- Perfectionism is a myth- Change begins with self-acceptance- There's power in vulnerability - You can't change others, just yourself- Forgiveness is for you not the other person- You can change- Your inner critic is not your friend- Your body keeps the score- You are not responsible for other peoples happiness- It's OK to walk away from toxic relationshipsAnd what to do instead that does actually lead to lasting change.

On today's episode:Why it is supposed to be hard to find the right playlist to listen to on Spotify, the right movie to watch on Netflix, or the right book to purchase on Audible. Cutting through the noise and mess of the NLP world back to the heart of what made this technology so wonderful in the first place. Some pure wisdom from David Henry Thoreau that has opened my future to new possibilities, And why you have to get your hands on Dr Karl Kruszelnicki's autobiography - A Periodic Tale.

On today's episode:I'm sure no one is still running an iPhone 3 with the same software it came installed with. It would be completely incompatible with current apps. It is crazy that the idea of installing necessary operating system updates for your phone makes sense, but most people are still running the same internal operating system for their life that they installed before they finished primary school! No wonder life has become so difficult and ineffective. Here are the 8 most important operating system upgrades you'll need to install in your mind if you would like to have a better experience of life.

On today's episode:How I fell into the entitlement trap again, and how Jim Carey helped rescue me from this dangerous state.Making sense of divine inspiration.The virtues of drinking alcohol on an empty stomach.Why it is important to own a bean bag.And my favourite writing from each of my 6 books.

On today's episode:The only way to tell if internet advice has any value, especially when you find completely contradictory ideas online. The importance of not just focussing, but knowing just what to focus on. Why I find the man made world more amazing than the natural one. An update on my latest writing project. What I do when my clients get scared, And pretending it is your first day on earth.

On today's episode:Why Jocko Willink is wrong about getting the best out of yourself and how to truly find freedom instead. How Lebron James models certainty more purely than anyone else in the public eye. My favourite art, music and comedy from the last few weeks. And, why your problems are not clinging to you but, you are the one clinging to them.

On Todays episode I interviewed my 20 year old daughter Amity about her experience of overcoming insecurity ahead of the curve. We also chat about her thoughts on:Readiness for change. How to increase it, and why you can't get away with pretending to be ready. The power of the clean coaching space to facilitate lasting change.Accusations, agreements and dealing with daddy issues. How to discover the defining moments that created insecurity in the first place.Why gamification may be the only way into the journey of overcoming insecurity for most people. Why it is easy to underestimate the hard work around rewriting the story and the importance of being prepared for the pressure test.And, where psychedelics fit in the process and what conditions make them safe.

On Todays episode I interviewed my 20 year old daughter Amity about her experience of overcoming insecurity ahead of the curve. We also chat about her thoughts on:Readiness for change. How to increase it, and why you can't get away with pretending to be ready. The power of the clean coaching space to facilitate lasting change.Accusations, agreements and dealing with daddy issues. How to discover the defining moments that created insecurity in the first place.Why gamification may be the only way into the journey of overcoming insecurity for most people. Why it is easy to underestimate the hard work around rewriting the story and the importance of being prepared for the pressure test.And, where psychedelics fit in the process and what conditions make them safe.

On todays episode:What the Olympics has to teach us about game theory and an explanation of the three main games each of us are invited to play.Why I have no respect for sobriety and why alcoholism is entirely a solvable problem (if indeed an alcoholic wanted it to be solved).How listening to an audiobook from someone who is long dead instantly dissolves the time, space continuum. And why Michael Leunigs carton of a woman's ass explains everything.

On today's episode:Why most of what you read on the internet about healing the wounds of your childhood is dangerously misleading.What I did to upset a couple of scared Christians this week and last week.How negative feedback from people who are not well placed to know who you are or to receive your gift, is actually very helpful in becoming a secure human being.What I said that lead to me being accused of deluding myself, but why everyone is delusional anyway.And why my wife never listens to this podcast.

On today's episode:Why I got into trouble with last week's episode and what I learnt about chess and marriage in the process. Why I bought twice as many fence posts as needed and what happened when I got home.And, the importance of cleaning the space in your 3 most important relationships and why the order of which relationship to work on first really matters.

On today's episode:The purpose of thinking. National identity as a construct.Why I offended 2 women at my last book event, and why it is likely to happen again in the future.The primary role of parenting and why you shouldn't let your kids do things that make you not like them (Jordan Peterson's rule 5).And why I'm never going to Bali again.

On this episode:An update on the upcoming insecurity project events.The evolutionary process from a bird's wing to the latest fighter jet and what that has to do with your place in the natural world.A critique on the prevalence of adults diagnosed with ADHD and other mental health labels and why the world rewards dysfunction more than health.And the logic behind the way your brain stores memories the clearest in moments of surprise.

This week on the Unhindered podcast;The impact of the in-home sound system on modern life and an explanation of the mechanics of sound itself,How listening to the great Sam Neill narrate his life story reminded me about the illusion of separation,Why familiarity closes your heart to the divine,A few countercultural insights from Tom Hodgkinson's book - How to be idle,And…The rudest LinkedIn message I've ever received.

On episode 301:- Why disappointment and embarrassment often go hand in hand, and why it is essential to revisit the very first time this happened in your life.- Dealing with my daughters daddy issues.- An update from the Self-permission book tour and why I'm still waiting for someone to agree with me about the book. - And the purest dream I've had about what is possible for a community of secure individuals free to show up at their best where it matters most.

On the 300th episode of the Unhindered podcast:My first strongly negative feedback about the new book and what that means for me leading into my national book tour.Why ‘more courage and less fear' is the worst advice you've ever heard.Why it won't be enough to understand all the games you are currently playing, you'll have to rank them in order of importance too.My most recommended books and other resources.Why I run without a shirt on.The advantage of being exhausted. And finally, why this will be the last Unhindered episode for a while, and what new podcast project I'm working on next…

On today's episode:How I survived and even slightly enjoyed recording the Self permission method audiobook. I'll tell you why this experience was different to the last two times I've recorded my books. I'll also share part 2 of the conversation with myself about my internal resistance and how I regained full permission to power up in this season (using the self-permission method).King Charles has cancer! Could it be something more than a just a sad coincidence? I'll show you why insecurity always needs an escape plan. And I'll explain the 10 principles for how to completely heal the wounds of your childhood (so that you reduce your chances of getting cancer).

Following on from my hot take on the Australia Day debate last week, I'll show you another piece of coaching content to help you make sense of what to do with these kind of issues in the world.Also on today's episode I've shared my own experience of how the self-permission model played out in real time over the last few weeks in my life so that you can see how the model works in action.

On the first episode for 2024, I've got an excerpt from my new book “The Self-Permission Method” to whet your appetite for the book launch in a month or so, and I open a can of worms by examining the current debate about Australia Day. See what happens for yourself when the delicate and polarising subject of the date of Australia Day is brought inside the safety of the coaching frame. If you were prime minister, how would you solve the issue after this episode?

On the final episode for 2023:The one biggest hindrance to listening to yourself and how to overcome it so that you can access the deep wisdom contained in your own heart. The life-changing insights and discoveries gained from my annual thinking week retreat. (What's a thinking week you may be asking? Tune in to find out)And an exciting announcement about the expected release date for my new book and an invitation to be a special part of the book tour. Merry Christmas to you and yours.

On today's episode:My best guess about why you keep tuning in to this podcast and what my most important contribution to your lives really is. How to know when you've named your deepest fear precisely enough to make insecurity a solvable problem (and what happens when you haven't).Some audio from a client who is wrestling with this very challenge.A vicious take down of psychologists and an explanation of exactly why they are unable to facilitate lasting change. And, an excerpt from Greg Bellingham's brilliant new book of poems “Way of the heart” (You can find the book here: https://www.wayoftheheart.com.au)

To summarise your whole life in 6 words is a bold claim, so let me be a little more precise but no less bold and aim to summarise your pain, disfunction and suffering in just 6 words. If you are willing to try it on, I'm sure you'll find this elegantly simple summary gives you more than enough clarity to defeat your worst fear for good.

On today's episode I'll show you what it means to have faith, where faith comes from and why it is so important for it to be tested.I'll also share the five key ideas on how to become the kind of person who holds onto their faith in what they cannot see especially when their hopes and dreams seem impossible. To have the full and effective human experience you must have faith, you must have it tested and you must endure the testing with joy.

On today's episode, again I've been given permission to share a real coaching session.If you've ever struggled with these kind of issues, I'm sure you'll find this conversation very useful- Long running or lingering health issues that the doctor doesn't know what to do about.- Noticing the ability to manage, force or fight yourself effectively through self-discipline is rapidly diminishing.- A polluted space within your own relationship with yourself that shows up as an overall lack of trust.- A sense of of neediness for someone or something to make your life better, happier or more complete. - A lack of clarity about who you need to be in order to succeed in this season.- A lack of clarity or confidence about all the various games you find yourself involved in.Listen in as Sammi shares openly about exactly where she feels stuck and watch as I apply the Self-permission coaching framework to give her more awareness and choice.

On today's episode I've been given permission to share a recent one on one coaching sessionIf you've ever struggled with these challenges, I'm sure you'll find this conversation useful:- Knowing you have value to add to the world, but procrastinating about ever fully speaking your message.- Discovering that the ‘more courage, less fear' approach hasn't actually moved the needle on your problem.- Worrying about the impact of your ideas on others and obsessing about what everyone will think about you.- Needing for things to be perfect before you take actionListen in as Mandy shares openly about how these issues are costing her and how I apply the coaching frame to give her more awareness and choice about a way forward.

On today's episode:Why the game of politics rewards insecurity and what that means for the average citizen,What to make of the polarising debate about the upcoming voice referendum, (and which way I'm voting…)And what the game of poker has to teach us about knowing when to go all in with what you have in your hand.

On today's episode of the podcast:Taking cues from an Aussie football star on the dilemma of talking about the things you are good at, Losing the ability to sleep as a direct result of unresolved internal issues,Why I had permission denied on the next phase of my grand book publishing plan and how I got it back again, The good reason I started gambling on sport this week, The significant dangers of being double minded,And…You won't believe me when I tell you the 18 models online coach training is finally ready to go! All the info here: www.jaeminfrazer.com/training

On today's episode:What I learnt about insecurity from a bunch of naked German oldies. The importance of pressure testing personal growth,Hidden wisdom from the creator of Young Sheldon, How knowing the rules of the game of life gives you an unfair advantage, And why goodness is a function of choice.

On today's episode:My first public statement on the ‘Burpgate' saga.Does Ivan Milat's death mean it's safe to Hitchhike now?Why sport makes me cry.Examining the problem with the ‘only human' language patternWhat the depraved behaviour showcased in ‘The sound of Freedom' movie reveals about human nature.Understanding some brilliant German rules before we return to Bad Berneck for a family holidayAnd why it is taking me so bloody long to release my 18 models coach training program online.

This week on the Unhindered Podcast: In response to a ridiculously light weight article published in Time magazine on anger management, here are three rules that offer real world wisdom on the subject instead. Also, why getting permission from yourself to succeed is great, but permission to play is even better. And why the feedback from last week's episode nearly broke me.

I was in a silly mood for this one…On today's episode:What does Marshall Bruce Mathers III have to do with life's hidden meaning?The 2 nap induced epiphanies I had this week.Just because someone has a cool name doesn't make them a legend.Why it's OK to drink VB. Even if you're not a real tough kind of guy. And, the great pressures endured by Christian teenage boys.I hope you laugh as hard as I did.

This week on the Unhindered Podcast:How to enjoy gluten, dairy, sugar and alcohol even when your doctor says you should never ingest these items ever again. Why The Apostle Paul and Saint Augustine guessed the wrong answer to the right question, and why each of us are still paying for their mistake. And why I'm supremely confident in the quality of the idea I'm writing my next book about, but not so confident in the quality of my writing about the idea…Oh…And there's some sweet new music to enjoy for your listening pleasure.

Everything changes in your world when you discover the wonderful art of state management. State really is king. If you can control your state, you can also control your outcomes. On today's episode I'll show you the three most important levers to quickly and effectively change your state no matter what is going on around you.Also: Why you are not real, but music and laughter is (and why music on this podcast is here to stay.)When it is appropriate to tell the government to F off.And more proof that safety is an illusion just as Helen Keller said.

On today's episode:What my daughter discovered about the single most difficult part of being a life coach.Why the self-esteem movement got caught focussing on the wrong solution to the right problem.More thoughts on the use of Psilocybin for personal development in a therapeutic context.And why editing the first draft of my latest book is a life threatening task.

On this week's episode: How I ‘cooked the goose' while writing my next book.Why perfect conditions are never as desirable as you'd imagine.The best thing Helen Keller ever said.Why risk averse people are actually the ones in most danger.How one of my clients got drunk on his own fumes for 3 daysAnd the joy of John Farnham's bagpipes.

My guest today is Charley Valher. Charley is an award wining business, marketing and investment expert from Melbourne who has just completed the Unhindered experience. He was happy to share very personally about his experience eradicating insecurity from his life and answer these tough questions on the subject. - Can you describe your initial resistance to the ‘overcoming insecurity' content I was publishing online? - What was it that caused you to realise that hidden insecurity was a problem worth investigating? - What were some of the deep moments of awareness that rocked your world when we started coaching together?- What did you find most transformational about the unhindered experience?- What did you find most difficult to address? - What has been the lasting fruit of confronting and eradicating your deepest fears about yourself?- Any surprising changes in your life you never anticipated?- Why do you think most people will not do what you've just done over the last 6 months?We had a lot of fun in the coaching process together, and this conversation was no different. I'm sure you'll find his journey super interesting and relevant to wherever you are at in the process of overcoming your own insecurity.

A big welcome to the bunch of new listeners from the US over the last few weeks. Here's what's on today's episode of the Unhindered podcast: - Un update on speaking at TEDx and where I'm at in the book writing process.- Why self-promotion always sounds weird and a gentle reminder about why you are special, but your problems are not. - Breaking free from the restrictions of your surname while mimicking Sadhguru.- The three principles you must understand in order to turn your biggest dreams into reality.- And why the BE DO HAVE model is still the fastest way to improve the quality of your life. Oh…and as a special treat for those who just don't dig the backing track, I've also released this episode without music.

A big welcome to the bunch of new listeners from the US over the last few weeks. Here's what's on today's episode of the Unhindered podcast: - Un update on speaking at TEDx and where I'm at in the book writing process.- Why self-promotion always sounds weird and a gentle reminder about why you are special, but your problems are not. - Breaking free from the restrictions of your surname while mimicking Sadhguru.- The three principles you must understand in order to turn your biggest dreams into reality.- And why the BE DO HAVE model is still the fastest way to improve the quality of your life. Oh…and as a special treat for those who just don't dig the backing track, I've also released this episode without music. (no. 279)

In order to experience lasting change your life, it is essential to first understand the exact structure of the way things are now. On today's episode of the Unhindered podcast I'll show you exactly why this is so damn important. Also on this episode:The hidden link between the formula for the volume of a cylinder, and the process of eradicating insecurity;Why I believe in your ability to handle the truth even when it seems too scary;How Brené Brown has inadvertently created a huge problem by helping the world celebrate vulnerability;And an important announcement about the addition of concreting to my list of business services.

All success and achievement starts in the mind. As Napoleon Hill says: “More gold has been mined from the thoughts of men than has been taken from the earth.” His book “Think and grow rich” is undoubtedly one of the all-time classics, but his authors note before he launches into the secret of wealth may be the best book introduction ever written. This alone has the power to transform your life. The challenge most people have with this notion however, is that when they look upstairs they find their thoughts are scattered, they don't know what they want, and are not certain they have an idea of any value. The problem is, to live the meaningful and effective life you desire, you'll have to develop and double down on one big idea above all others. So, having clear thoughts about what you really want and then organising those thoughts into a commitment to action is a non-negotiable part of success.If this feels overwhelming to you, I'll show you exactly where to start in order to make instant progress here. On today's episode I'll explain how to play the ‘silly ideas only game' and why this may be the only way to access the real vision you have for your life if you feel like you don't know what you want.Also on this episode:How TEDx Canberra has been playing silly buggers with me,Why Steven Pressfield is entirely wrong about being at war with resistance,And why dealing with unresolved issues in your marriage could very well be the biggest thing in the way of your big idea seeing the light of day.

On todays episode:The great value of psychedelics in healing therapy, spirituality and helping becoming genuinely good humans. I'll explain how to harness the power and grace of these natural substances and avoid the one big danger. How to live in a way where the goal is to disappoint as many people as it takes to never disappoint yourself again.And, why my last instagram video was too rude for the internet and had to be taken down. (Here is the TED talk I referred to : ‘The science of psilocybin and its use to relieve suffering.' by Roland Griffiths https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=81-v8ePXPd4 )

It's taken me a couple of weeks to process and integrate all the learnings from the trip of a lifetime to the US and Guatemala with my son, but I've put together some reflections that I think you'll enjoy. Here are some of the highlights from this episode:Why I'm likely to win parent of the year unless chimpanzees assess the awards criteria like they seemingly do for neck pillows.The five keys I use to reframe my experience to get more of what I want, no matter what is going on around me. How to know who you really are and what to do when you are with people who have no idea about what is really inside you. And the ironic double standards of when you're allowed to use cuss words in the USA.

Get a behind the scenes view of the Insecurity Project and all that has gone into my journey to this point as Sean Steele follows his curiosity and turns the mic around to interview me.Here are some of the great topics we covered:When you set such high standards for your own life, how does that play out in your parentingWhat is the biggest misunderstanding about insecurityThe impact of my religious upbringing on my work todayHow to expand on the map of the world we get given in the family we are born intoWhether religious people are harder to coachWhere insecurity still shows up for meWhere to from here and what's next for the Insecurity Project.

On today's episode of the Unhindered podcast: You may have heard me talk about my power and grace tattoos before, but today I'll explain what happens when I get them around the wrong way. Even though these words still are my most important course correctors, this week I got myself in strife by looking for grace when I really needed to use my power. I'll also talk about the dangerous things that happen when we are scared, and why Franklin D Rooselvelt's words still ring true almost a century after his stirring speech. And finally, there's Lebron James' moon boot, what happened before the Big Bang, and why listening to Russel brand on 2x speed is bad for your health.

Teaching someone how to love you. On today's episode:- The $50million dollar solution to the problem of Australian bushfires that's already working.- Why Malcom Gladwell's book Blink isn't that great, and why Jordan Peterson's book beyond order is. - How to make an affogato properly. - The single most important question to ask your spouse and for them to ask you right now.- And the 5 core qualities you'll require to effectively retrain others how to treat you.

On today's episode:- Showing up in other people's dreams as the messiah.- The problem with running your business as a one-woman band.- My plan B if this life coaching thing doesn't work out.- How I resolved my back pain in 30 minutes.- And, how to align the 4 key areas of life so that you win your most important games.

Jessica Wilson is a repeat tech entrepreneur and cofounder of Women Making Waves which uses NFT's to fund law reform in Australia and the USA especially in areas that are adversely affecting women. She is a remarkable human doing extraordinary work in the world with an incredible story to tell.Her retail tech company Stashd' operates in 150 countries and saw her as a grand finalist on China's version of shark tank, leading to Forbes magazine naming her as one of 1,000 people under 30 most likely to change the world in the next 50 years!In my conversation with Jess we cover:Her personal journey of overcoming injustice and inequality and how she fought her back from being sexually abused. (You can watch her remarkable video on the subject here)Changing the meaning on the experiences that have the capacity to destroy you.Toxic masculinity, the male patriarchy and her vision for an inclusive society. The importance of showing grace and kindness to yourself in the healing process. You can find out more about Jess and the work she is doing in the world at https://womenmakingwaves.io