Codependency Alchemy: The Podcast

Do you struggle with setting boundaries in your family—or find yourself triggered when those boundaries get ignored? In this deeply personal episode, I share my own experience of setting and enforcing a boundary with my grandma, and the powerful process of repairing after a rupture. You'll learn why boundaries aren't about controlling others but taking responsibility for our own emotional safety, and how making repairs after conflicts fosters genuine healing. Plus, we'll do a live shadow work practice together to help you understand your fears around boundary-setting and heal the root causes beneath them.This episode is for you if:* You find it hardest to set boundaries with family.* You feel unheard, invalidated, or triggered when boundaries are ignored.* You're unsure how to make genuine repairs after a conflict.* You want practical ways to support your nervous system when triggered.

Do you hold yourself and your partner to unrealistic expectations, believing healthy relationships should never feel triggering or difficult? In this intimate session, I guide a member of the Codependency Alchemy community, through shadow work and inner child healing to explore her anxieties around relationship triggers, unmet expectations, and fears of being alone. We uncover the root causes behind her self-judgment and the pressure she places on her partner, transforming these fears into deeper self-compassion and self-acceptance. Listen in and learn how to embrace relationship triggers as opportunities for growth, understand the cycle of anxiety and judgment, and build true emotional safety from within.This episode is for you if:* You feel anxious when your partner isn't "doing the work."* You struggle with unrealistic expectations about relationships.* You frequently judge yourself harshly for getting triggered.* You're ready to release old fears and reconnect with your inner child.

Do you struggle to set boundaries—or feel defeated when they're ignored? In this episode of Codependency Alchemy, I dive deep into the true meaning of setting boundaries, breaking common misconceptions, and offering a practical three-step framework you can start using immediately. Through relatable stories from my own life and our community, we'll explore how boundary-setting can initially feel uncomfortable but ultimately creates more authentic, fulfilling, and respectful relationships. If you're tired of feeling anxious about enforcing boundaries or resentful when they aren't respected, this episode is exactly what you need.This episode is for you if:* You feel anxious or guilty when setting boundaries.* You've struggled with boundaries being ignored or disrespected.* You're ready to move past people-pleasing into empowered action.* You need clear steps on how to enforce boundaries effectively.

Have you ever wondered why you keep getting triggered by the same things — even after all the journaling and self-awareness? In this episode, I share the simple guided practice that's helped me (and hundreds of clients) begin to truly heal codependency using shadow work, somatics, and inner child healing. You'll learn how to meet core wounds with compassion, curiosity, and presence.We'll walk through:* How to identify the root fear behind a trigger* Why somatic awareness is key to inner child healing* How to connect with your inner child (even if no memories come up)* What it really means to reparent and set your inner child freeWant to go deeper? Join Codependency Alchemy, our Substack membership for access to the Healing the Mother Wound 30-day journey — with daily prompts, poems, and guided practices, all for just $4.95 this May. We start tomorrow: just click here to join.Want a step-by-step version of this practice? Grab my free Shadow Work and Inner Child GuideWatch Masterclasses from our Membership LibraryRead posts From My Journal ✍

Do you carry guilt from past self-abandonment or struggle deeply to forgive yourself for not holding boundaries?In this heartfelt episode of Codependency Alchemy, I guide a member from our membership— who's been on her recovery journey for over two decades—through shadow work and inner child healing. Together, we explore her patterns of people-pleasing, self-harm, and difficulty setting boundaries, uncovering her underlying fears of abandonment and loneliness. We get to witness her reconnect deeply with her inner child and learn how nurturing herself with compassion and accountability can transform her healing journey. This session beautifully highlights why self-forgiveness, patience, and consistent self-care are crucial to breaking generational cycles.This episode is for you if:* You struggle with self-forgiveness and feelings of guilt.* You're navigating the complex feelings of abandonment or loneliness.* You find yourself trapped in patterns of people-pleasing and self-abandonment.* You're ready to heal your inner child and cultivate deep self-compassion.SPECIAL INTRO OFFER: Join the Codependency Alchemy Membership today and save 40% off!

Am you parenting from a place of punishment, or are you guiding your child toward autonomy, self-respect, and healthy emotional expression? In this episode, I share my insights as a M.Ed and Montessori educator on how to foster respect, emotional resilience, and healthy boundaries in children. I discuss practical strategies to prevent people-pleasing behaviors, handle challenging moments through playful connection (think pillow fights and peekaboo!), and support sensitive children by tracking emotional triggers. You'll learn to create structured yet nurturing routines that offer stability for your child—and yourself—as you navigate parenting with self-compassion, authenticity, and curiosity.This episode is for you if:* You worry about raising a people-pleaser or struggle setting boundaries with your child.* You have a sensitive, anxious, or energetic child and want actionable ways to support them.* You're looking for playful parenting strategies to build emotional resilience.* You want guidance on creating structured daily routines that benefit both you and your child.SPECIAL INTRO OFFER: Join the Codependency Alchemy Membership today and save 40% off!

Do you keep attracting emotionally unavailable partners, struggle with feeling abandoned, or constantly doubt your own judgment in relationships? In this episode, I guide Sierra, a member of our Codependency Alchemy community, through a powerful healing process after a painful breakup. Sierra openly shares her experience navigating feelings of abandonment, betrayal, and shame after a promising relationship ended abruptly. Using shadow work and inner child healing, Sierra reconnects with her younger selves, explores the roots of her shame and self-worth struggles, and learns to integrate their unmet needs into her present life. You'll gain practical strategies for increasing self-awareness, tracking relationship patterns, and making conscious decisions to stop cycles of emotional pain and trauma bonds.This episode is for you if:* You're healing from a difficult breakup or emotional abandonment.* You repeatedly attract emotionally unavailable partners.* You struggle with shame, low self-worth, or trusting your intuition.* You're seeking actionable steps to shift unhealthy relationship patterns through inner healing.SPECIAL INTRO OFFER: Join the Codependency Alchemy Membership today and save 40% off!

Have you ever felt lingering tension in a relationship—like unspoken resentment, fear, or anxiety creating distance between you and your partner? In this episode, I dive into conscious clearing, a practice that helps clear unresolved conflict and deepen connection.Rather than seeing conflict as something to avoid, I reframe it as an opportunity for growth, intimacy, and repair. I break down the three key steps for a conscious clearing, what tends to happen when we don't have these, and why it can positively impact our relationships.This episode is for you if:* You feel tension or unspoken resentment in your relationships.* You struggle with how to approach difficult conversations without making things worse.* You want to learn a simple practice for clearing conflict and deepening emotional intimacy.Codependency Alchemy is a reader-supported publication and podcast. To support my work and join our community, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.SPECIAL INTRO OFFER: Join the Codependency Alchemy Membership today and save 40% off!

Have you ever felt stuck in a relationship, unsure if you should stay or walk away? In this week's session episode, T, a member of the Codependency Alchemy community, comes to the call seeking clarity about whether her relationship is still aligned. But what emerges is something deeper—a lifelong pattern of feeling responsible for the care and well-being of others, rooted in childhood parentification.This episode is for you if:* You feel stuck in a relationship and don't know whether to stay or leave.* You struggle with feeling responsible for others' emotions and well-being.* You want to learn how inner child work can help you make aligned decisions in relationships.Codependency Alchemy is a reader-supported publication and podcast. To support my work and join our community, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.SPECIAL INTRO OFFER: Join the Codependency Alchemy Membership today and save 40% off!

Do you ever feel anxious but can't quite pinpoint why? In this podcast live episode I am sharing my personal experience of navigating discomfort and anxiety, walking you through my process of identifying triggers and reflecting on the frustration of revisiting the same wounds. We'll talk about the importance of self-compassion in the healing journey, and practical ways to tend to intrusive thoughts and emotional overwhelm.This episode is for you if:* You struggle with anxiety and want a deeper understanding of its roots.* You feel frustrated revisiting the same emotional wounds and want to cultivate more self-compassion.* You're navigating changes in relationships and community as you grow.Want to join our next Podcast Live event? Make sure you become a free subscriber on our Codependency Alchemy Substack here.SPECIAL INTRO OFFER: Join the Codependency Alchemy Membership today and save 40% off!

Do you ever feel afraid of being truly seen? In this episode, Amba, a member from our Codependency Alchemy membership shares her transformative journey from seeking external validation to embracing self-love and inner trust. After reconnecting with her ex following deep inner work, she reflects on how she is struggling with fears of judgment and being seen in her work. Through a shadow work and inner child healing session, Amba reclaims her power, redefines her protectors' roles, and steps into courage, truth, and open-hearted vulnerability. Listen in as we explore the process of releasing old fears, integrating new strengths, and cultivating self-compassion.This episode is for you if:* You struggle with the fear of being seen, judged, or rejected.* You're working on shifting from external validation to self-love.* You want to learn how to reframe fear, meet your inner child's needs, and embody new strengths.Codependency Alchemy is a reader-supported publication and podcast. To receive new posts and support my work and our community, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.SPECIAL INTRO OFFER: Join the Codependency Alchemy Membership today and save 40% off!

Do you feel overwhelmed when your child has a tantrum? In this episode, we break down the natural cycle of tantrums—beginning, middle, and end—and explore why they are a healthy release of pent-up emotions. We discuss how children attune to parent's nervous system, the importance of regulating your own emotions, and practical techniques to help children (and adults!) process their feelings. By doing your own inner work and shifting your mindset around tantrums, you can show up with more calm, empathy, and connection.This episode is for you if:* You feel anxious, frustrated, or helpless when your child has a tantrum.* You want to learn how your nervous system impacts your child's emotional regulation.* You're looking for practical tools to support your child through big emotions with more confidence and ease.SPECIAL INTRO OFFER: Join the Codependency Alchemy Membership today and save 40% off!

Ever feel like your dreams are just out of reach, especially when the fear of failure or embarrassment keeps holding you back? In this episode, Assisi from our Codependency Alchemy membership shares how our recent Shadow Work Sunday Chat

Have you ever felt weird about being happy that you totally self-sabotage it with limiting beliefs that make you spiral in fear or doubt? In this live episode hosted on Substack, I share about a moment of joy that took a quick turn into self-doubt and fear of judgment. After celebrating a big win, I found myself spiraling with thoughts that completely knocked me off the joy high I was riding. Together, we're going to move through a shadow work and inner child practice around our desires… something many of us have been too scared to name.This episode is for you if:* You sometimes feel like joy, love, or success isn't really meant for you.* You worry about being judged or losing people when you're thriving.* You want to learn how shadow work can help you feel safe and grounded in your joy and what you desire.Want to join our next Podcast Live event? Make sure you become a free subscriber on our Codependency Alchemy Substack here.SPECIAL INTRO OFFER: Join the Codependency Alchemy Membership today and save 40% off!

Do you struggle with intrusive thoughts about your partner's past or find yourself self-sabotaging when things feel too good? In this episode, a member from our Codependency Alchemy membership shares her journey of recognizing codependency after a self-sabotaging moment during the holidays. Together, we explore the fears of not being "enough," the challenges of embracing happiness, and the power of community support in healing. Listen in as we dive into shadow work and inner child healing to release past burdens, reconnect with the inner child, and step into a more peaceful, present version of yourself.This episode is for you if:* You struggle with intrusive thoughts or comparing yourself in your relationship.* Happiness feels uncomfortable, and you worry good things won't last.* You want practical tools to release the past and create more peace in the present.Codependency Alchemy is a reader-supported publication and podcast. To receive new posts and support my work and our growing community, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.SPECIAL INTRO OFFER: Join the Codependency Alchemy Membership today and save 40% off!

Have you ever felt like your partner just doesn't get what you need? Maybe you've asked for something (more than once!) and felt crushed when they didn't follow through. It's frustrating, right? In this episode, we're diving into the tricky—but super important—difference between needs, wants, and desires in relationships. I'll share some hard-won lessons about what's really hiding underneath those requests and how to talk about them in a way that actually lands.We'll also chat about how shadow work and inner child healing can totally change the way you show up in your relationships. Plus, I've got some tips for speaking your truth with confidence and kindness.This episode is for you if:* You feel unheard or misunderstood when you ask for what you need.* You're not sure how to tell the difference between a want, a desire, and a deeper need.* You're ready to build healthier, more honest communication in your relationships.SPECIAL INTRO OFFER: Join the Codependency Alchemy Membership today and save 40% off!

In this episode I guide Jo, a member from our Codependency Alchemy membership, through a session of shadow work and inner child healing to address feelings of invisibility and unworthiness within her partner's family. Together, we explore the emotional impact of being unseen, create a safe space for Jo's inner child, and discuss practical ways to integrate this work into daily life.This episode is for anyone who:* Feels overlooked or excluded in family or social dynamics.* Struggles with validating their own feelings and experiences.* Wants practical tools for connecting with and healing their inner child.SPECIAL INTRO OFFER: Join the Codependency Alchemy Membership today and save 40% off!

In this live episode, I share my personal journey of rebuilding trust and navigating intimacy in relationships. We'll explore the challenges of physical intimacy, the importance of self-validation, and how inner child work can transform triggers into opportunities for growth.This episode is for anyone who:* Struggles with vulnerability and fears rejection in relationships.* Finds physical intimacy a source of conflict or insecurity.* Wants to learn how to build trust and resolve conflicts with compassion and clarity.If you want to join our next Podcast Live on Substack, make sure you become a free subscriber by clicking here.SPECIAL INTRO OFFER: Join the Codependency Alchemy Membership today and save 40% off!

Do you ever feel anxious or inadequate in your relationship, especially when intimacy isn't present? In this episode, I guide a member from our Codependency Alchemy membership through the shadow work and inner child healing to uncover the core wounds that are fueling her fear of failure in love (specifically around intimacy, or lack of). Together, we work to validate her inner child, release the need to make everyone happy, and reconnect with her gifts to build self-trust.This episode is for anyone who:* Struggles with anxiety or fear of rejection in relationships.* Feels unworthy or inadequate without constant reassurance.* Wants to learn how to manage triggers and reconnect with their authentic self.SPECIAL INTRO OFFER: Join the Codependency Alchemy Membership today and save 40% off!

Have you ever felt dismissed or unseen by your partner, especially during stressful times like the holidays? In this episode, I share real-life moments from my relationship with Justin, unpacking the triggers that surfaced during our trip home. Through shadow work and inner child healing, I reconnected with my younger self, gained clarity on my needs, and approached the conflict with more compassion and a deeper understanding of both myself and him.This episode is for anyone who:* Struggles with feeling dismissed or unimportant in their relationship.* Finds themselves triggered when returning home or navigating family dynamics.* Wants to learn how to use journaling, somatic practices, and inner child healing to navigate relationship challenges with empathy and self-awareness.SPECIAL INTRO OFFER: Join the Codependency Alchemy Membership today and save 40% off!

STAY CONNECTED! Click here to join the Codependency Alchemy MembershipListen to Luce's Soul Retrieval session here.In this episode:* How Luce discovered codependency work and what led her to it* What her initial thoughts and hesitations were around codependency and inner child work* How the work we do in the Codependency Alchemy membership has transformed her life, and the breakthroughs she has had since joining* The insights and gifts that she has uncovered through inner child healing This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit alyssaaazander.substack.com/subscribe

Updates: Next week's podcast will be the last episode of the year as I take a break to focus on our community here on Substack. I'm excited to create deeper connections and introduce new, fun ways for us to connect. If you haven't already, download the Substack app to join in!Also, a quick reminder—membership is still just $9/month for now, but the price will increase in the new year so if you've been thinking about joining make sure you hop in now!

In today's post, I'm sharing a few things I wish I had known at the start of my relationship with Justin, and honestly, even before I started dating anyone. These realizations have been game-changers for me, and I hope they resonate with you too.Download my free Shadow Work and Inner Child Guide to get a printable worksheet that you can use again and again!Upcoming Events for Codependency Alchemy

This story is a powerful reminder that our healing comes from facing the uncomfortable emotions and beliefs we carry, even when they feel overwhelming. It's through sitting with our pain and giving it space that we find freedom and peace.Download my free Shadow Work and Inner Child Guide to get a printable worksheet that you can use again and again!Upcoming Events for Codependency Alchemy

I'm excited to share a personal story today—one that has layers beyond what it seems. You're definitely going to want to grab a drink, get comfortable, and enjoy. We're talking about boundaries, cookies, and the uncomfy parts of learning our own dysfunction through our relationship dynamics.Only 5 days left to get HTMW Workbook for 50% off!Download my free Shadow Work and Inner Child Guide to get a printable worksheet that you can use again and again!Upcoming Events for Codependency Alchemy

This week I get to sit down with a member from our Codependency Alchemy membership, Nicole, who is exploring the challenges of parenting while navigating her own inner healing journey. In this session I guide Nicole through shadow work and an inner child healing, validate her unmet needs, and help release the burdens of feeling "broken" and "not good enough."This conversation offers a roadmap for intergenerational healing and the courage to show up authentically, even in the midst of our own imperfections.Grab Healing the Mother Wound Workbook for less than $10 using promo code "ANNIVERSARY"!Buy a copy of "Healing the Mother Wound: With Mother Earth"Buy your copy on AmazonDownload my free Shadow Work and Inner Child Guide to get a printable worksheet that you can use again and again!Upcoming Events for Codependency Alchemy

In this episode, I take you back to 2018, when my relationship was taken over by darkness. My partner Justin was battling depression, and I was trapped in a cycle of trying to "fix" him, making his pain and discomfort my responsibility. It led us to a breaking point, where we both felt unseen and alone.Download my free Shadow Work and Inner Child Guide to get a printable worksheet that you can use again and again!Upcoming Events for Codependency Alchemy

On today's episode, I sit down with KaRonna, a working mom struggling with something I think many of us can relate to— the inability to prioritize herself and her own needs amidst the demands of career, parenthood, and life in general, fearing she'll make the wrong decision.Download my free Shadow Work and Inner Child Guide to get a printable worksheet that you can use again and again!Upcoming Events for Codependency Alchemy

In this raw and vulnerable episode (my first time actually crying on the podcast), I open up about my recent experience with depression and feeling discomfort with slowness and spaciousness in my life, which was triggering fears around losing my sense of purpose and self-worth if I'm "not doing anything.”Download my free Shadow Work and Inner Child Guide to get a printable worksheet that you can use again and again!Upcoming Events for Codependency Alchemy

In this 1:1 session I sit with a member from our Codependency Alchemy membership. Lena was struggling with codependency, insecurity, and fears around her partner leaving her or cheating which was triggering past traumas. Her goals were to build self-acceptance, heal from past hurts, and develop the ability to set compassionate boundaries in her relationship.

Here's the thing that we need to really start understanding: we have spent countless days, months, and years over-identifying and picking apart our mind's stories, beliefs, and thoughts. In doing so, we have completely neglected our bodies stories which hold the keys to our deepest forms of healing and transformation.In today's episode I guide the women on the call through a somatic practice where you will take away information and an experience that will illuminate how your body is physically responding to certain patterns and tendencies.With this wisdom and practice you can begin to access the precise actions needed for you to clear what is blocking you from living your most fulfilling and authentic life.Need help or support in doing the shadow work and inner child healing? Join us in our Monthly Masterclasses, Meetups, and AMA Chats in the Codependency Alchemy Membership! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit alyssaaazander.substack.com/subscribe

I recently did a free 3-day immersion where I walked those who signed up through a masterclass on Identifying Codependency, using shadow work and a somatic practice to explore in community.The next two episodes are from this masterclass, and I hope you enjoy the conversations we had as much as I did!What we cover in today's episode:* What is the mother wound?* What is codependency?* Reflection on close relationships to see where codependency shows up in your life* How to do shadow work for codependency patterns and why this is so important for deep healingReceiving support and perspectives from others can really deepen our healing process. I encourage you to share your experiences and insights in the comments or our Codependency Alchemy chat. This helps build connection and encourages us as we navigate these parts of us.Please don't hesitate to reach out to me or our community if you need guidance or accountability in implementing the inner child healing practices. You can join the Codependency Alchemy Membership by upgrading your subscription for $9/month and get ongoing support, resources, and community with like-minded souls healing codependency. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit alyssaaazander.substack.com/subscribe

In today's episode Crystal asks for support on what to do when conflict comes up in her relationships, how self-sabotage has started to show up, and fears around her partner leaving and finding someone better.Resources:IT'S OFFICIAL! THE WAITLIST FOR THE MASTERMIND IS OPEN AGAIN!

This week I share about my journey navigating food and meals in our home when we have different health/eating goals. Learn how to establish autonomy over food choices, practice self-trust, and support your partner's (and your own) individual journey.Resources:* Join the Codependency Alchemy Broadcast Channel on Instagram* Codependency Alchemy: The Membership: $9/month (or $90/year) Subscribe on Substack for shadow work prompts, private podcast episodes, and access to monthly masterclasses and group coaching calls. Take the next step in your healing journey and join a supportive community.* The Codependency Quiz: 9 questions to help you see where codependency is influencing your life and relationships.* How to Heal Codependency in Your Relationships: A 5-week self-paced course that guides you through the tools & practices I use to get clients from resentful to reciprocal relationships.* Get your copy of “Healing the Mother Wound: With Mother Earth” on Amazon & BookBaby BookstoreLet's connect! Follow me on Instagram, TikTok, and you can even subscribe and watch the full episodes on YouTube! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit alyssaaazander.substack.com/subscribe

Many of us struggle with vulnerability and getting close to people, even though deep down it is what we deeply desire. In this episode I get to witness Aaron, who moved a lot in his childhood and felt like he learned to not get attached because everything was temporary.Resources:THE WAITLIST FOR THE MASTERMIND IS OPEN AGAIN!

In this episode, we explore how choosing compassion and grace over self-criticism can help heal codependency and the mother wound.When we are hard on ourselves for our perceived flaws or mistakes, we perpetuate feelings of not being good enough. It is through showing ourselves compassion and accepting where we are in our journey that we actually create enough spaciousness to heal codependency and the mother wound within us.I'll be reading from my book “Healing the Mother Wound: With Mother Earth” today, and sharing from the section titled, “Destiny”.I hope these words are like a salve to your soul, and that they remind you of who you truly are.Resources:IT'S OFFICIAL! THE WAITLIST FOR THE MASTERMIND IS OPEN AGAIN!

In this episode I get to sit with Santia and explore the challenges that come from a relationship ending, and I know that many of us can relate!Shadow Work Prompt* “If I let go, then…” (what am I afraid it will mean about me?)* “If I let go, then…” (what am I afraid will happen?)Resources:IT'S OFFICIAL! THE WAITLIST FOR THE MASTERMIND IS OPEN AGAIN!

Today we're going to get into some of the most common codependency warnings signs that I've learned along the way.Resources:* Join the Codependency Alchemy Broadcast Channel on Instagram* Codependency Alchemy: The Membership: $9/month (or $90/year) Subscribe on Substack for shadow work prompts, private podcast episodes, and access to monthly masterclasses and group coaching calls. Take the next step in your healing journey and join a supportive community.* The Codependency Quiz: 9 questions to help you see where codependency is influencing your life and relationships.* How to Heal Codependency in Your Relationships: A 5-week self-paced course that guides you through the tools & practices I use to get clients from resentful to reciprocal relationships.* Get your copy of “Healing the Mother Wound: With Mother Earth” on Amazon & BookBaby BookstoreLet's connect! Follow me on Instagram, TikTok, and you can even subscribe and watch the full episodes on YouTube! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit alyssaaazander.substack.com/subscribe

I'm going to be doing a long-awaited podcast episode on something I promised you a long time ago— and to be quite honest, I forgot! This episode is going to be about the tool that Justin and I used to help rebuild the trust in our relationship when we got back together.Resources:IT'S OFFICIAL! THE WAITLIST FOR THE MASTERMIND IS OPEN AGAIN!

In this weeks podcast episode we explore shadow work and inner child healing with Marella, who has noticed her our anxious tendencies in her relationship and is curious about how to start exploring more healthy and supportive patterns for herself and her relationship.Listen to this full episode by subscribing to Codependency Alchemy: The Membership for $9/month (or less when you join annually)Resources:IT'S OFFICIAL! THE WAITLIST FOR THE MASTERMIND IS OPEN AGAIN!

This week's podcast episode is my personal share on what transpired over those few days where we were not on the same page, how I managed to stay aware that I was triggered by the things he was saying to me, and instead of getting defensive and fighting with him, how I was able to bring the conversation forward in a way that allowed for deep and meaningful connection and repairs in our relationship.

If you feel like it'd your job to make everyone happy, or that it's always your fault when someone is upset, this definitely listen to today's episode. To learn more about why we do this, and practical solutions that you can implement in your life and relationships to help you navigate this pattern, you can check out the masterclass we did on this in the Codependency Alchemy Membership.Resources:* Join the Codependency Alchemy Broadcast Channel on Instagram* Codependency Alchemy: The Membership: Subscribe on Substack for weekly shadow work prompts, exclusive podcast episodes, and access to monthly masterclasses and group coaching calls. Take the next step in your healing journey and join a supportive community.* The Codependency Quiz: 9 questions to help you see where codependency is influencing your life and relationships.* How to Heal Codependency in Your Relationships: A 5-week self-paced course that guides you through the tools & practices I use to get clients from resentful to reciprocal relationships. ONLY $25 FOR THE MONTH OF MAY!* Get your copy of “Healing the Mother Wound: With Mother Earth” on Amazon & BookBaby BookstoreLet's connect! Follow me on Instagram, TikTok, and you can even subscribe and watch the full episodes on YouTube! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit alyssaaazander.substack.com/subscribe

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit alyssaaazander.substack.comI'll never forget when I was in my situationship back in 2019 and all my sexual abuse trauma came bubbling up to the surface. I was completely confused because I felt like I had forgiven and put that past me, and I couldn't understand why it so loud all of a sudden.I learned that I had really repressed some very real feelings and emotions that a very young part of me was still holding. And in today's podcast episode, Marcee was experiencing something very similar.Please keep in mind when listening to today's podcast episode that we will be discussing sexual abuse and trauma, so if this topic is sensitive to you please take care of your needs and check in with yourself before listening.

For those of us with codependent or anxious attachment patterns, it's super common to find ourselves making a new person or relationship mean something about us. We start dreaming up this whole future with them and attaching our sense of self-worth and belonging to how much they like us.Resources:* Join the Codependency Alchemy Broadcast Channel on Instagram* Codependency Alchemy: The Membership: Subscribe on Substack for weekly shadow work prompts, exclusive podcast episodes, and access to monthly masterclasses and group coaching calls. Take the next step in your healing journey and join a supportive community.* The Codependency Quiz: 9 questions to help you see where codependency is influencing your life and relationships.* How to Heal Codependency in Your Relationships: A 5-week self-paced course that guides you through the tools & practices I use to get clients from resentful to reciprocal relationships. ONLY $25 FOR THE MONTH OF MAY!* Get your copy of “Healing the Mother Wound: With Mother Earth” on Amazon & BookBaby BookstoreLet's connect! Follow me on Instagram, TikTok, and you can even subscribe and watch the full episodes on YouTube! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit alyssaaazander.substack.com/subscribe

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit alyssaaazander.substack.comWhen we have experienced abusive relationships, it can be challenging to trust ourselves and others. I remember feeling betrayed by myself, like how could I allow myself to be in something so toxic for so long? If I didn't know better then, how could I trust myself to know better in the future?Here are some things we discuss in this weeks episode that will hopefully help you in understanding this pattern of struggling to trust after abuse:

Opening up about a past "situationship" was incredibly difficult (or should I say embarrassing), but I really wanted to share with you all how that experience illuminated my insecure attachment patterns and codependent behaviors that I was completely unaware of.What is a situationship? I would describe a situationship as a romantic connection, but nothing that suggests commitment. It's perfect if you want to be in limbo and constantly question your sanity.

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit alyssaaazander.substack.comHonestly feeling unwell. Annoyed. This is the best word to describe me right now. I'm dysregulated AF. Everything seems to just have the perfect smell, taste, or sound to just send me into a spiral, like smoke out of my ears fuming.I loathe feeling this way.And yet feeling this way is the key to unlock the next door I'm being invited to walk through. An…

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit alyssaaazander.substack.comIf you find yourself blaming someone or something outside of you, you are avoiding something within you.It was so lovely to connect with those of you who were able to make the call for our April Meetup. Here's the inner child practice that was mentioned on the call today:I want to thank you again for your vulnerability, courage, and curiosity on the call. It was so powerful to walk so many of you through shadow work and inner child healing! Please feel free to leave any reflections that came through for you in the comments.ILYSM

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit alyssaaazander.substack.comThis months Masterclass in Codependency Alchemy: The Membership for paid subscribers is on How to Stop Taking Responsibility for Other People's Feelings and Moods, and discovering common signs of codependency like fixing others' problems, excessive apologizing, and changing boundaries to please others. Learn how to identify these patterns and why we do them with the shadow work prompts I share with you. If you're interested in watching the full class and transcript, you can upgrade to paid.

I know I needed community and a brave place for me to navigate my unhealthy relationship patterns, so I created the places I needed. In this episode I talk about how Codependency Alchemy has grown, and thank you all for an amazing SEASON 2!This is just the beginning babes. Stay tuned.Resources:Join the Codependency Alchemy Broadcast Channel on InstagramCLICK HERE TO GET ON THE WAITLIST FOR THE MASTERMINDCodependency Alchemy: The Membership: Subscribe on Substack for weekly shadow work prompts, exclusive podcast episodes, and access to monthly masterclasses and group coaching calls. Take the next step in your healing journey and join a supportive community. Use this link and save on The Membership! The Codependency Assessment: 10 questions to help you see where codependency is influencing your life and relationships.How to Heal Codependency in Your Relationships: A 5-week self-paced course that guides you through the tools & practices I use to get clients from resentful to reciprocal relationships. (USE PROMO CODE "PODCAST" TO GET 50% OFF)Get your copy of “Healing the Mother Wound: With Mother Earth” on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, & BookBaby BookstoreLet's connect! Follow me on Instagram, TikTok, and you can even subscribe and watch the full episodes on YouTube!Support the show

Many of the women I have the privilege of working with are mothers. Mothers who feel touched out and need space, but feel guilt when it comes for asking or taking it, or they struggle trusting the resilience of their child and their partner to figure out their own way. I share about my background with child development and things I've learned about cultivating a prepared environment that supports the child's development and behavior.Resources:Join the Codependency Alchemy Broadcast Channel on InstagramCLICK HERE TO GET ON THE WAITLIST FOR THE MASTERMINDOn Children - By Kahlil GibranCodependency Alchemy: The Membership: Subscribe on Substack for weekly shadow work prompts, exclusive podcast episodes, and access to monthly masterclasses and group coaching calls. Take the next step in your healing journey and join a supportive community. Use this link and save on The Membership! The Codependency Assessment: 10 questions to help you see where codependency is influencing your life and relationships.How to Heal Codependency in Your Relationships: A 5-week self-paced course that guides you through the tools & practices I use to get clients from resentful to reciprocal relationships. (USE PROMO CODE "PODCAST" TO GET 50% OFF)Get your copy of “Healing the Mother Wound: With Mother Earth” on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, & BookBaby BookstoreLet's connect! Follow me on Instagram, TikTok, and you can even subscribe and watch the full episodes on YouTube!Support the show