Podcasts about middah

Welcome to our Daily Bitachon class. We are now on the Haggadah shel Pesach series, in the unit of Mitechila, Ovdei Avodah Zarah, Hayu Avoteinu. Originally our forefathers were idol worshipers, and Hashem brought us close to him. We quote a pasuk in Yehoshua ויאמר יהושע אל כל העם Yehoshua tells the people that going back in history,, , כה אמר יי אלהי ישראל: בעבר הנהר ישבו אבותיכם מעולם, תרח אבי אברהם ואבי נחור, ויעבדו אלהים אחרים. ואקח את אביכם את אברהם מעבר הנהר, ואולך אותו בכל ארץ כנען. J את זרעו ואתן לו את יצחק. Our forefathers lived on the other side of the river, Terach the father of Abraham and Nachor worshipped other gods, " And I took your father, Abraham, and I took him throughout the land of Canaan." V'arbe et Zaro , and I increased his seed, V'eten et Yitzchak, and gave him Yitzchak . V'Ekach/ Hashem took Abraham Avinu, throughout the land. It sounds like He was holding his hand, walking him through the land, but that's not really what happened. There were trials and tribulations. It was a lot more than just He took him, so to say, and brought him. Rav Yehezkiel Levenstein says that in life, there are many events that make things happen, whether it's a famine, or a wife being kidnapped, or a war with four kings and five kings, but what is really is going on is Ve'ekach / Hashem is taking us by the hand and bringing us step by step. V'arbe et Zaro . Now simply, V'arbe means to make many. Hashem made him have many children. But Rashi on this pasuk in Yehoshua ( 24,3) says that the word וארב V'arbe is spelled without a ה hey , and therefore could be read as V'arev , which means merivah , fights. Kama merivot v'nisyonot asiti imo . There were a lot of fights, a lot of tests, until I gave him children. So we see that Hashem is telling us a very important concept through Yehoshua. Look back at history. Look at the trials and tribulations and the tests that Abraham went through before he got Yitzhak . Why was that? Rav David Cohen quotes Rav Chaim Volozhin who tells us, in his commentary, Ruach Haim on Perkei Avot , Perel 5 Mishna 3 , that Asara Nisyonot nitnaseh Avraham Avinu / Avraham, our forefather, received ten tests. The Nefesh HaChayim asks, Why does it say Avinu here about Avraham, whereas in a previous Mishnah, when it talks about the ten generations from Noah to Avraham , he's not called Avraham Avinu ? Rav Chaim Volozhin tells us an important principle, which is that when a tzaddik toils and works on a certain middah , that Middah becomes natural for his children-with just a little bit of work, they'll get there. He says, Avraham Avinu's tests gave us a certain spiritual DNA. He says, for example, that it's natural for a Jewish person to die Al kiddush Hashem . We see that simple people have given up theirs lives, Al kiddush Hashem . Why? Because Avraham Avinu was ready to jump into the fiery furnace. Additionally, Avraham Avinu picked up and moved to Eretz Yisrael . That test, of Lech Lecha became inherited. The fact that we Jewish people say Kol Ma D'avid Rachmana L'Tav Avid/Everything that Hashem does is for the good, is because Avraham Avinu didn't question God when he had to leave the land after the famine. So we see an unbelievable concept- that Hashem purposely made Avraham Avinu go through these tests so that his spiritual genetics would be stronger, and he'd be able to pass that inheritance down to the Jewish people. This is not only true of Avraham Avinu. The Ruach Haim quotes a pasuk in Mishlei 20,7, מִתְהַלֵּ֣ךְ בְּתֻמּ֣וֹ צַדִּ֑יק אַשְׁרֵ֖י בָנָ֣יו אַחֲרָֽיו׃ / The Sadik goes in his simplicity . Fortunate are his children afterwards . According to this Nefesh HaChaim , this is a huge hiddush , that it's not just a zechut that the Sadik does something when he's 70 and it's going to help his children. That also might be true. But the Hodesh is the concept that you're bequeathing your accomplishments to your children. So, if a man gets married at 24 and went through a lot of tests before that and then has a child when he's 30 or 33 or 40, or if it's child number 8 that's born into old age, that child has in him all of the tests that the father and mother overcame. It's now built into him. So sometimes we have all kinds of tests and trials and tribulations. We don't realize what it's doing for us, and what is going into our spiritual makeup that we're going to pass down to our children. Everything Hashem does is measured. Avraham Avinu had to wait until he was 99 years old to have a child. Why did he have to wait so long? So one answer is that Hashem wants to hear the Tefilot of Sadikim . Another answer that is brought down in early sources, is that Avraham Avinu was Mekarev people, but he couldn't have a child until he had a brit milah , because he had to be perfect in that way first. And once he had a brit milah , he was somewhat separated from the rest of the world. So therefore, Hashem pushed it off as late as possible. There are all kinds of answers, but now we're hearing a new answer. Avraham Avinu had to be of that age because he went through so many tests, and then he was ready to give that spiritual DNA over to his future children, and future generations.

Welcome to our humility series. What was the reason Moshe Rabbenu was the greatest of prophets? What made him so special? The Nefesh HaChaim (gate 1, chapter 15) says that only Moshe Rabbenu merited that his full Neshama entered his body with all of its power and influence. That's why in Devarim 33:1, Moshe Rabbenu was called Ish HaElohim /a man of God. Rav Yaakov Hillel, in his commentary Nishmat HaYam on Nefesh HaChaim, connects this to what the Nefesh HaChaim writes in his third gate (chapters 13& 14), that Moshe Rabbenu stood out in the area of humility. It says in Bamidbar 12,3 וְהָאִ֥ישׁ מֹשֶׁ֖ה עָנָ֣ו מְאֹ֑ד מִכֹּל֙ הָֽאָדָ֔ם אֲשֶׁ֖ר עַל־פְּנֵ֥י הָאֲדָמָֽה׃ Moshe Rabbenu was the most humble of men. Furthermore, in Shemot 16,7 Moshe Rabbenu said about himself, ונחנו מה / What are we? Avraham Avinu said, I am dirt and dust , but even dirt and dust are something . It's not a lot, but it's something. However, Moshe Rabbenu said I am nothing . That's why, says Rav Yaakov Hillel, he was able to connect to Hashem on such a high level and reach such a high level of Holiness to the extent that the Shechina spoke through Moshe Rabbenu's throat, as it says, Moshe Rabbenu was different than all of the prophets . All other the prophets said Zeh Davar Hashem / this is the word of God. But Moshe Rabbenu said Ko Amar Hashem/ this is exactly what God says. It came from his throat as if God was talking through him. Why was this? Because he humbled himself to the extreme, and that humility purified his physicality to a point that no other person ever reached. Rav Chaim Volozhin, in his sefer Ruach Chaim Pirkei Avot (chapter 1, mishna 1) uses this to explain the Mishna that Moshe Kibel Torah M'Sinai/ Moshe accepted the Torah from Sinai in the zechut of his humility, more than any other prophet. That's why he was able to see with what's called a shiny window. Windows have different levels of clarity. Certain windows are tinted and you can't see through them well. The better or clearer the window, the better you can see through it. Since what separates us from God is our physicality, our holding of ourselves as a something (what's what we mean by physicality) interferes. But because Moshe's humility was so high, there was nothing to interfere with his connection to Hashem. The Baal Shem Tov has an interesting commentary on, אנכי עומד בין ה׳ וביניכם I am standing between you and your God. The simple meaning is that Moshe Rabbenu is the intermediary, but the Hasidim read it as, a person's Anochi , his egoism is what stands between him and God . Thus the interference between us and God is our egos. Since Moshe Rabbenu had no ego, there was no separation between him and God. This is a very interesting chiddush because the Rambam, in his Shmonei Perakim , where he talks about this concept of the clear glass and the unclear glass, says that every Middah creates an interference. And we see from here that the all/ powerful Middah that, so to say, cleans away all the dirt and grime from a person's soul, is the trait of humility. That was Moshe Rabbenu's greatness. The same Ruach HaChaim says that when it says, "Avraham, Avraham" in the Torah, there's a break between the two, like a line between the two Avrahams. But when is says Moshe Moshe , it doesn't have that. Why is that? Because one of the Avrahams is the Avraham down here, and the other Avraham is the Avraham above- the soul, or the source. His body and Neshama had some kind of separation, so there wasn't an exact connection (of course we talking about Avraham Avinu, so it was only the slightest little bit, but there was still some difference). Moshe Rabbenu reached even higher level. I saw in Rav Yisrael Eliyahu Weintraub's commentary on Nefesh HaChaim that he askshow we can make it sound like Moshe was greater than the Avot ? He explains that this is a concept we talked about before, of the Nanas/ the dwarf, Al Gaveh Anak standing on top of giants, which means Moshe (who, of course was not a dwarf) was building on what the Avot saw. The Avot were able to see Hashem. They used the term Elohim for Hashem. Rashi says, in the beginning of Vaera , that God appeared to the Avot with the name Elohim . But when He appeared to Moshe, it was with Hashem's Divine name of Yud and Heh and Vav and Heh . What's the difference? Elohim means God is in control of all forces. God's able to change nature. Avraham Avinu went into fire and the fire didn't burn him. That's changing nature. But Moshe Rabbenu was on a higher level. It was not like just changing the fire that it wouldn't burn. When he made the miracle of turning water into blood, and blood into water, that was a new creation. When God opened up the earth for Korach, it was a new creation. That higher level of there is no existence but God, which we call En Od Milevado, happened when Rabbenu gave us the Torah. Moshe Rabbenu reached that level and that connection, and his humility caused him to have that high level of understanding of God (Nefesh HaChaim Shaar 3,perek 13 where he discusses this difference between the two names of Hashem and how that impacted Moshe Rabbenu versus the Avot). Going back to our story of ego and I separating us from God, let's get more practical. We're not talking about levels of prophecy between us and Moshe and the Avot. Many political critics keep track of how many times a president or presidential candidate say I in their speeches. I did this and I did that. And I and I and I. That's the feeling of I am doing. That's the Anochi , the I , the ego . There's a beautiful to story told of Rav Shneur Zalman of Liadi who eventually became the famous Baal HaTanya. He was studying under the Hasidish Rebbe Rav Dov Ber, who's known as the Maggid of Mezerich. Late one night, young Zalman knocked on his Rebbe's door to ask him a question. The Rebbe called out, " Who's there ?" And the young boy responded, " It's me ," confident that he would be recognized. The Rabbi repeated, " Who's there ?" and again, he said, " It's me." After the third time that the Rebbe asked Who's there ? the young student finally said, " It's Zalman." The Rebbe then opened the door and said, " My dear Zalman, the time has come for you to have a self-imposed exile. When you return, we will analyze your experience together." In those days, great people went into exile and for some reason, at this point, it was his time. So he went to a certain inn and that very night, thieves broke in and stole the silverware of the innkeeper. The next morning, the innkeeper was suspicious of this young stranger, Zalman, accused him of stealing the the silver and demanded that he confess. Zalman cried, "It was not me! It was not me!" The innkeeper grabbed him by the neck and accused him again. And again he cried, " It's not me, it's not me!" He then pulled himself out of the innkeeper's grip and fled back to Mezerich. He told the Maggid the story and the Maggid said, " This, my dear Zaman, is a lesson which you should never forget. Do you see how many times you were forced to shout, "Not me, not me?"That was in order to undo the effect of calling out proudly, "It's me!" Yes, of course this is the high level training of a great Hasidic Rebbe who eventually started a great dynasty. But the point for us is that the greater the person is, the less the I is there. Moshe Rabbenu did not possess an I and therefore he reached the greatest of levels. And the opposite, the greater the I, the bigger the interference between the person and God.

We continue with our series on humility. Rav Wolbe, his sefer Aleh Shor (vol 1 page 134) talks about the concept of ladders of self-improvement. We find this, he says, in sefer Mesilat Yesharim , where Rav Moshe Chaim Luzzato cites a Gemara in Avoda Zara 20B that says, Torah brings to one being careful and being careful brings you to alacrity and so on. The Hovot Halevavot has ten gates which are also a ladder of sorts. Another of the ladders Rav Wolbe cites is the letter of the Ramban, the famous Igeret HaRamban , which is also a ladder. He tells us that the ladder starts with talking softly. Talking softly brings you to staying away from anger, staying away from anger brings you to humility, humility brings you to fear of God. And Fear of God brings you to be happy in your lot. From there, you come to the Shechina dwelling on a person. Wonderful ladder of the Igeret HaRamban. Many might not appreciate Rav Wolbe's outlook of this as ladder of the Ramban. As we said, the ladder really starts from humility. So this is a beautiful concept, how humility is the first step. And of course, you can't jump right into humility, so we'll go through it more in depth. The first thing the Ramban says, in beautiful words, is to תִּתְנַהֵג תָּמִיד לְדַבֵּר כָּל דְּבָרֶיךָ בְּנַחַת, לְכָל אָדָם וּבְכָל עֵת Accustom yourself to speak gently. All your words, to all people, and at all times. There are lot of alls in there. I once learned that the Ramban is trying to tell us, There are no exceptions here. All your words means every single word you say, to all people, even that nudgy guy, at all times. So even if I'm on my way to my daughter's wedding and I'm a little hassled, or I'm on the way to the airplane, slow it down. All people, all time, all your words. What is that going to do for you? וּבַזֶּה תִּנָּצֵל מִן הַכַּעַס, And this will protect you from anger, which is a most serious character flaw, which causes one to sin. Ok so let's say you got there. You spoke softly. Then, if you speak softly, you don't get angry. Rabbi Ades says, We see from here that your outside impacts your inside. Look how simple this. You're not angry yet, and you got yourself to use that low tone, which in itself is soothing and will protect you from getting angry. And once we are protected from getting angry, what happens next ? He uses beautiful words: Once you've distanced yourself from anger, תַּעֲלֶה עַל לִבְּךָ מִדַּת הָעֲנָוָה, The quality of humility will enter your heart. He says, humility is the best possible trait there is. The Ramban is telling us something very, very powerful: Anger, which stems from arrogance ( you only get angry because things don't go your way) is the antithesis of humility. Anger and humility can not coexist. It's like fire and water. When you take away the water, the fire will burn. When you take away the fire, the water will move. It's interesting that anger is compared to fire . The Zohar says, don't burn any fire in any of your dwellings on Shabbat - and the first fire is the fire of anger. And Humility is compared to water. It says, just like water travels downwards, humility is about going down. Fascinating! Fire and Water, anger and humility. Another interesting point is that the numerical value of מקוה Mikveh is one more than כעס /anger, because going to the mikveh absolves one of the trait of anger; it purifies. That means it's almost a natural reaction. He doesn't say, Remove the anger and then work on you're anava. His words are, וְכַאֲשֶׁר תִּנָּצֵל מִן הַכַּעַס, תַּעֲלֶה עַל לִבְּךָ מִדַּת הָעֲנָוָה When you distance (or save ) yourself from anger, humility will go up on your heart. Naturally , humility will into your heart. And now that you're humble, תַּעֲלֶה עַל לִבְּךָ מִדַּת הַיִּרְאָה, The Middah of Fear of Hashem will come into your heart. What was stopping you from fearing Hashem was Ga'ava ( Hey I'm in charge) which is the opposite of Yirat Hashem. Taaleh , you are elevated . This is not a regular ladder. This is an escalator . You put your foot on one step, and it moves you up to the next one. So your humility will cause your fear to go up. Why? Because now that you're no longer arrogant, you start paying attention. Where'd I come from? Where am I going? I am רִמָּה וְתוֹלֵעָה as frail as a maggot or a worm when alive, even more so in death. He continues, And who's going to judge you? When you start thinking about all these things, you'll be afraid of your Creator. You'll protect yourself from sin, and you'll be always happy with your lot because somebody who is arrogant always wants more. And then he says, When you continue to act with this trait of Anava, and you stand meekly in front of men and you're fearful from Hashem and from sin, אָז תִּשְׁרֶה עָלֶיךָ רוּחַ הַשְּׁכִינָה, וְזִיו כְּבוֹדָהּ, וְחַיֵּי עוֹלָם הַבָּא. The spirit of Hashem's presence will rest upon you and you'll live the life of the World to Come (I'll add in this world ) Unbelievable. The man that has humility is living in Gan Eden on earth. It's fascinating that the Ramban ends with the words, Read this letter once a week and neglect none of it. He says , Every day that you read this letter, Hashem will answer your heart's desires . People think this is some kind of magical segula : Read the letter of the Ramban and Hashem will answer your prayers. No. It says, as we've mentioned many times, that when a person is humble, Hashem answers his prayers. When a person is arrogant, Hashem doesn't answer his prayers. More than that, when the Shechina is in front of you, your prayers are answered easily. When you go to the Kotel, Hashem's Shechina is there. One that becomes humble, says the Ramban, the Shechina is on top of him, so of course his prayers are answered. This is not some kind of magical segula . This is the reality of becoming humble. That's the beautiful ladder of the Ramban, that starts from humility and ends with God's Shechina dwelling on you. What a powerful, powerful concept, to understand and appreciate what we're doing in our work on Anava .

Welcome to our class on humility. When it comes to working on and thinking about a specific Middah , there is always a possible danger that something could ruin the Middah or ruin the effort. In the third gate of the Hovot Halevavot, the Gate of Serving Hashem (fourth chapter), he talks about the ten levels of service of Hashem. The ninth level (which is pretty close to the top) is people who serve Hashem for the right reasons, yet lack an important piece of information. שלא נשמרו ממפסידי העבודות, They aren't careful from guarding themselves from the things that could cause their service Hashem to be lacking. He quotes a pasuk from Kohelet (10:1) זבובי מות יבאיש יביע שמן רוקח /The flies of death can ruin the best of oils and quotes one of the pious men telling the students, " I'm afraid for you, for the greatest of sins ." They asked, What is the greatest of sins? And he said, הגבהות (החונף) והגאוה, כמו שאמר הכתוב Feeling exalted, being a flatterer, and having Ga'ava/ arrogance, as it says תועבת ה' כל גבה לב:‏ ,/ An abomination to God is anybody arrogant. This is scary. A person can do everything right and it can backfire, specifically when a person is working on humility. He might say, " Wow, look who I am. I'm working on humility." He ends up becoming arrogant from that! Rav Wolbe, in his letters, (vol 2, page 129), hints to this Hovot Halevavot and says, When a person works on Middot, every step of the way, he feels that his actions are coming from arrogance that's born from the Flatterer, which are almost the exact words of this Hovot Halevavot. And he says, I have a tradition from my rabbis that we should never think we're doing anything. Whatever we do is only to train ourselves. We're apprenticing, we're interning. When I'm trying to be Mechaven in my prayers, I'm just training myself in how to do it. Whatever I'm working on, it's just a training session. He says, Hitlamdut / an internship or training doesn't drag arrogance . In Aleh Shor (vol two, page 194) he says something similar: When it comes to apprenticing, it's impossible to become arrogant. If I'm doing something good, I can become arrogant. But if I'm just training, I haven't really done anything because I'm only in training. When I'm in training mode, I'm always looking to see what I can fix. My critical eye is going over me every step of the way. A therapist, a doctor, whoever's in training, they know they're in training. Like the nine interns following the big professor through the hospital. They're not arrogant. They know that they're interns. He stresses that we must understand this, and that the only success a person will have in working on themselves is if they have this attitude. Otherwise it's just going to backfire. You might say, " Look at me! Not only am I working on Bitachon, not only do I work on Hessed, I'm even working on Anava! Do you know how great I am?!" He says, If a person does not understand this concept that you're in the internship stage , you're just training, you're in the minor leagues, then you're better off not doing this. You'll be a good Jew without it. It's not for you. It's too dangerous. Furthermore, in Aleh Shor (vol 1, page 65) Rav Wolbe says we are supposed to think, "I just want to get a little bit better, or a little bit more truthful in my approach," One should not think, " I made it ," or " I got it ." Like the example of the poor man who knocks on the door and comes in in the middle of the meal. He is served whatever they're up to. He's not going to say, " Ooh, look who I am!" You're just an intern. You're apprenticing. It shouldn't get to your head. Mesilat Yesharim , in chapter 11, talks about different manifestations of Ga'ava . He says there's a certain type of arrogant person who says in his heart that he's so great and so honorable that honor can never separate from him, and therefore he doesn't even need it. To show that, he'll go to the extreme in humility. But in his heart, he lifts himself up and says, I'm so high up and so respected that I don't even need respect . I'm so great, I don't need someone to tell me how great I am . I have so much of it. I don't need anyone else to pat me on the back. A slightly different type of arrogant person says, "I want to be clearly designated as a person with many great qualities. It's not enough that people say for example, that I'm wise, or I'm kind. He want them to add to the list of his great qualities that I'm very humble. He becomes arrogant in his humility! He wants honor for showing that he's running away from honor! He sits in the back of the shul, and he acts in a very humble way to show that he's the ultimate Anav . Don't call me Rabbi, it's okay, he says. But in his heart he thinks, There's no one wiser and more humble than me . אֵין חָכָם וְעָנָו כָּמוֹנִי בְּכָל הָאָרֶץ" So both the Mesilat Yesharim and Hovot Halevavot are warning us that working on oneself and working on humility can backfire. That's why we go back to Rav Wolbe who tells us an important rule: One must always put on his training cap. He's an intern. He doesn't know anything. He's a humble person in training. The sefer Or Yisrael by Rabbi Yitzhak of Peterberg, in the section Kochvei Or ( (אות י brings down a pasuk from the Gemara in Berachot 61 that says that Yetzer Hara is compared to a fly. And they quote our pasuk זבובי מות יבאיש יביע שמן רוקח / The flies of death can ruin the best of oils. Why is the Yetzer Hara compared to a fly? The Or Yisrael answers, Because as many times as you yell at him, swat at him or blow on him, he doesn't go away. You have to keep sending away. He keeps coming back. That's the Yetzer Hara. He doesn't give up. And that's why even when we're working on something good, and we're trying to send him away, he comes right back. You have to be always aware of him. That's the only way to fight him- to take your fly swatter and keep swatting away. He gives a nice hint- the Gemara in Berachot 10A says that the Isha Shunamit , when describing Elisha, said, I know he's holy. How did she know? One of the reasons is that she never saw a fly on his table. There were never flies around him. He says this is a mashal - There were never flies meant he was able to keep chasing away the Yetzer Hara.

Welcome to our class on Anava . We've been talking a lot about working on humility. Rabbi Chaim Friedlander's sefer Siftei Chaim , on the topic of Middot (page 133) asks a powerful question. He points out that the Mesilat Yesharim bases his sefer on the ladder of levels that are described by Rabbi Pinchas ben Yair, starting with Torah. Learning Torah brings to Zehirut/being careful, which brings one to Zerizut/being fast, which brings to Nekiut/being pure and goes on to Prishut/separating oneself physicality , purity and Hasidut/piousness. All the way at the end is humility . Humility is one of the last of the levels. It brings to one to Ruach , Hakodesh etc, and then we reach perfection. So seemingly, if we go step by step up the ladder, if we haven't yet conquered purity and piousness, how are we even talking about humility, which is so high up? To answer, the Siftei Chaim quotes a mashal he heard from Rav Yerucham Levovitz, the famed Mashgiach of the Mir in Europe, who says: When a person goes to a feast of kings, there are many, many portions and courses. There's the first course, the second course, the third course . I was once told that at the queen's table in England there are four forks and three knives! There are so many different hors d'oeuvres, appetizers, entrees, desserts… But what happens if a poor man walks in during the meal when they're up to the third course? Do they say, " Let's go back to the hor d'oeuvres ." No. He doesn't even ask for that. Whatever they're up to at that time is what they give him, and that's enough for him at that point. He's not worried about courses or etiquette or about the proper way to do things. He's hungry . That's the mashal . The nimshal is that we are poor when it comes to Avodat Hashem. Yes, 'wealthy' people of old such as Rabbi Pinhas ben Yair and others, of course had an order. He's like the chef telling you how you're supposed to serve the meal. Each one is going to lead to the next one. Yes, you want ices after the hors d'oeuvres to cleanse you palate, and yes, you want to have tea at the end. But a person who is spiritually poor has to grab whatever they give him, even if it's out of order, and even if he doesn't understand exactly what he's doing and why he's doing it. He has to take what he can get. The Gemara says, ' This world is like a wedding, Grab and eat. Grab and eat. ' What does that mean? It means sometimes you're not eating in a specific order, with all the rules and regulations. You're just grabbing and eating. That's the way it is with our Ruchaniut/spirituality. I'll grab and eat, I 'll nosh on this and that. This is similar to the story that the Chafetz Chaim witnessed once. A girl was selling apples in the marketplace. Someone came and knocked over her basket of apples and they were rolling all over the street. Ruffians started grabbing the apples. The girl was just standing there crying, until a wise man told her, Grab something for yourself also . When the Chafetz Chaim heard this, he said, That's what's going on in our lives. The Yetzer Hara turned over the apple cart and he's grabbing away everything from us. So grab something back for yourself . We don't have to do everything exactly according to the proper system. We, too, can work on humility. We may not have the full depth and the understanding that we'd have if we did it with the recommended approach, on the regular road. Here's an example of another Middah . He says, hessed - we all know what kindness is. We do kindness, but if you want to really dissect it, true kindness means that I am not an egoistic person. I'm not someone that's focused on myself. I'm giving because the other person needs and all the other niceties- we'll call it the icing on the cake to do a hessed properly . But just because you can't have a cake with icing, that doesn't mean you have can't cake at all. Sometimes you might only have the icing, but if you're hungry, you'll take cake without the icing or icing without the cake. You can't be picky. At the end of the day, it will give you nourishment. It might not give you exactly what you need, but, as the famous saying goes, Perfect is the enemy of good (quoted by Rabbi Frand at the Siyum HaShas, and attributed to French philosopher Voltaire). This means that sometimes people try to do something exactly the way it's supposed to be but end up do nothing. It's like a very perfectionist housewife saying, If I can't have the perfect meal, I'm not going have any guests at all. That's really counterproductive. Just because you can't have all the niceties, with waiters and china and a ten course meal, that doesn't mean you shouldn't have guests at all. It's the same thing when it comes to working on our Middot, says Rav Yerucham Levovitz. We might not have everything perfect, and it might not be the way it's supposed to be, but perfect is the enemy of good. Therefore, when we're working on humility, don't say, how can I work on humility? I'm far, far from it. You can also have a connection to humility. The Chafetz Chaim once met a baker and asked, " How's business? " The baker replied, " It's so hard to be a baker. The housewives are so picky and they're always complaining, 'It's too hard… it's too soft.' "Then a few years later he met the baker again and asked how business was. This time the baker said says, " Business is great!" The Chafetz Chaim asked what had changed, and the baker replied, " Well, it's wartime. There's a shortage of bread. If anyone can get any bread, they're thrilled and happy to take the it. There are never any complaints." The Chafetz Chaim said it's the same thing with Ruchaniut . In the days of old where there was plenty of spirituality, and plenty of people serving Hashem, in a world that was much more pristine, of course in Shamayim, they were picky. The chef in Shamayim's kitchen was very picky and very exacting, Everything had to be organic, everything had to be fresh, everything had to be Whole Foods. But in you're in a time of famine, no one gets picky on what they're going to eat or serve. If they get picky, they die. Like the sad story in Masechet Gittin , of the wealthy woman who sent her aid out to buy fine wheat in the marketplace. There was no fine wheat left but by the time he came back to tell her, and she sent him out to buy a lower grade of wheat, there was none of that left either. She then sent him for barley and the same thing happened, and on and on until eventually there nothing was left to eat at all. So smart people realize, and Hashem's Bet Din up there is quite smart, that w hen there's a famine, we're happy with what we can get . We don't have the perfect meal. We don't have the right silverware, we don't have the right ingredients, nor the right dishes. But it's like making sprinkle cookies with your children on a day off, with all their germs and mess…They're so proud and you're so proud. Well, that's the way Hashem looks at our Avodat Hashem today. So make your little cookies, put some Anava sprinkles on them and be proud.

Welcome to our series on Anava . Chacham Bentzion Abba Shaul, in his sefer Or LeTzion Chochma UMussar (page 242) brings up the following point: On one hand, our rabbis tell us in Sanhedrin 37A, that everyone has an obligation to say, " The world was created for me. " That means you're supposed to look at the sun, the moon, the stars and know that everything in the world is there for me . That might sound like arrogance. But Chacham Bentzion says we see from here that humility does not mean that a person feels lowly and he is in a state of Ye'ush and despair thinking he has no value. It doesn't mean you think, "There's no benefit in what I am and in what I do." That's not the definition of humility. That's Shiflut/lowliness and negativity .. What is humility? Humility means that I believe that whatever I accomplish is a gift from Hashem. I'm a somebody. I may have a beautiful car or a beautiful watch, but someone gave me the car and someone gave me the watch. I'm not saying, This car is a piece of junk. No, it's a beautiful car, but it was given to me by somebody else . He further expounds on this by explaining a seeming contradiction: On one hand, the pasuk in Divrei Hayamim II 17:6 tells us, " וַיִּגְבַּ֥הּ לִבּ֖וֹ בְּדַרְכֵ֣י יְהֹוָ֑ה And his heart was uplifted in the ways of Hashem." VaYigba Libo almost means arrogance . But on the other hand, Mishleh tells us in pasuk 16:5, תּוֹעֲבַ֣ת יְ֭הֹוָה כׇּל־גְּבַהּ־לֵ֑ב יָ֥ד / it's an abomination to be arrogance. He explains that one refers to the past and the other one refers to the future. What you did in the past, you're supposed to be humble about. You're supposed to look back and say it was with Hashem's help. I'm supposed to look back and say, Baruch Hashem, thank you Hashem, for giving me those opportunities. Like the famous story that the Chafetz Chaim was once overheard in a moment of contemplation and meditation, discussing his life with Hashem, " Hashem, I owe You so much. You gave me the Mishna Berurah, you gave me the Chafetz Chaim, you gave me all these things." That's all in the past . But when you go in the future , you have to have strength. You can't despair. You should say, I'm gonna do it. I can do it. Conversely, I heard from Rav Wolbe that when the Chafetz Chaim was in the middle of his Mishna Berurah , there were certain tragedies and challenges that were going on in his personal life. One day he opened the window, shook his fist and said, " You're not going to stop me!" He was talking to the Yetzer Hara. Look at that courage! Look at the energy, look at the almost arrogance. I'm going do it! That's fine. I'm going to do it is beautiful. I did a little bit. I'm going to do more. I'll keep on doing more. I have talents that Hashem gave me. I'm going to keep growing . That attitude gives the person the drive to move further in his Avodat Hashem . He used the rule, One that has aspirations will be successful even though it looks like naturally it won't happen. His example is the tremendous drive that the Americans had to put a man on the moon. If you have a drive and you have a dream, you'll get there. But many people are broken because they flip the pipes. Instead of saying, Forget about what I did in the past, let's look at the future , they make the past the main thing. They focus on the past and forget about the future. This is the dichotomy between humility (or arrogance) and lowness in the wrong way. Rav Eliyahu of Izmir (1640 -1729) was a leading Rav of Izmir, Turkey. He authored over 30 different tremendous sefarim including Shevet Mussar, that are learned all over. In his sefer Chut shel Hessed on Parashat HaAzinu, he discusses the Piyut that we mentioned previously, that we say on Rosh Hashanah. The last stanza says, " Piyut הִשְׁתּוֹנֵן, וְהִכּוֹנֵן, וְהִתְבּוֹנֵן בְּסוֹדֶךָ. וְהִבַּטְתָּ, מָה אַתָּה, וּמֵאַיִן יְסוֹדֶךָ. וּמִי הֱכִינְךָ, וּמִי הֱבִינְךָ, / Sharpen yourself and prepare yourself. Look into your secrets. What does it mean to Look into your secrets? He says, the secret refers to the fact of my humble beginnings- What am I made of ? Dust. Further, after we say, וְהִתְבּוֹנֵן בְּסוֹדֶךָ we also say, What are you Ma Atah /What are you? Like Moshe and Aharon said to Korach (Shemot 16,7) Where are your roots? So it starts off, I'm humble and I'm nothing. Well, if that's the case, if I'm humble and I'm nothing, then what is the purpose of my Mitzvot? Can a mosquito impact the king? Then we say, no, slow down מי הכינך Who set you up for this? Hashem set you up for greatness. מי הבינך Who gave you understanding ? And מי ינידך , what's making you move ? You have a soul inside of you, a Neshama, a spirituality inside of you. Realize where you came from. He quotes the sefer Bet HaElohim that says that there's a danger in thinking of yourself as the lowest of low, because you'll end up saying Hashem doesn't supervise me, He doesn't look at me . But then you can go to the other extreme and say, I'm arrogant. Mi Hashem Who is God? It's a constant balance on this tightrope, not to get stuck with being broken because I'm a nobody, and not to be arrogant. It's like the Shfeel Hazahav/ the golden path. Rav Wolbe, in Alei Shur vol 2 page 160 quotes the Hovot Halevavot in Shaar Hakniah, which is dedicated to humility. In the second chapter, he says, הכניעה היא אשר תהיה אחר רוממות הנפש והתנשאה מהשתתף עם הבהמות במידותן המגונות, וגבהותה מהידמות במידות / Humilty comes after you realize the exaltedness of your soul and that it's being uplifted. I'm not a partners with an animal in their low Middot. It comes when you realize how wise you are and how dear is your soul. You know about all the good Middot. כאשר תהיה סמוך לזה כניעת הנפש ושפלותה, אז תהיה מידה משובחת , And then then when I add a little spice of humility in there, then the humility is a good Middah. אבל זולת זה איננה נכנסת במידות המשובחות ומעלות הנפש, אך במגונות שבהן, כי ענינה בזה כענין הבהמות But if it's humility that's not coming from that, it's not considered good quality. It's just despair. It's not, humility. That's just the animal that doesn't have any recognition of what it is at all. As Chacham Bentzion said, You can feel great in who you are, and then you add that little flavor of, All those qualities I have, I got from Hashem . Like we stated at the beginning- Look at this beautiful car that I have. I have a stretch Rolls Royce. Wow, what a car. But you know what? My father gave it to me. So I'll now humble myself to my father for all that he gave me. It's not a contradiction. As long as you have that right attitude of, What I have is great, but it was given to me. And more than that, I have a responsibility to use it properly, that is the proper hashkafa / attitude , not to be brought down with this work on our humility. Further in that same discussion, Rav Wolbe quotes Rabbenu Yonah in Shaare Avodah where he says the first step to serving Hashem is that man knows his value, realizes his level, realizes who his parents and his grandparents are, how hashuv they were and where he came from- And say to yourself , Adam Gadol V'Chashuv Kamoni , something that's important like me today, with all the great qualities I have, I am the children of the greats, of the kings of old, how can I sin? So Rav Wolbe is teaching is that learning your good qualities is not a contradiction to humility. We have to make sure we have that proper outlook when we're working on humility.

Welcome to our humility series. We're talking about thoughts that cause one to become humble. The Hovot Halevavot in the second gate, Shaar HaBechina, which looks into creation (chapter 5), says, " There's something that you should look into in creation. It applies to the greatest and smallest of creatures. It's something that's hidden, that you don't see with your regular senses. It's the constant of movement . Everything that's happening is happening because of movement. He says, without movement, nothing would come to be. And he quotes a statement. רב הטבעים עם התנועה /Most of natural events come about due to movement It's what makes the cells move . What makes your blood flow? What makes you able to walk and move your limbs? And he says, When you understand the secret of movement, you'll understand how spiritual it is . It's from the wonders of God. And you'll realize, Hashem's tremendous mercy on you . And you'll realize that all of your movements are connected to the will of your Creator. He's making everything move. The only thing that He left is certain things you have freedom of choice in. But otherwise, as we say in the morning, Hamechin Mitzader Gaver,/God sets up the steps of man . So pay attention to every movement you make and realize how He is connected to that movement. Be a little bit shameful of Him and give yourself over to His will because He's watching and looking and directing you. This is a very, very important point- we don't have our own independent energy. Hashem makes us move at all times. This is something to think about. On Rosh Hashanah there is a Piyut that Sephardim say, written by Rav Yehuda Halevi, the author of the Kuzari. It's called Ya Shimcha/Your name is Hashem. It says in the last stanza of that Piyut הִשְׁתּוֹנֵן, וְהִכּוֹנֵן, וְהִתְבּוֹנֵן בְּסוֹדֶךָ. וְהִבַּטְתָּ, מָה אַתָּה, וּמֵאַיִן יְסוֹדֶךָ. וּמִי הֱכִינְךָ, וּמִי הֱבִינְךָ, / Sharpen your mind and prepare yourself and delve into your secret (which refers to your soul) And realize what are you and what is your source of being? Who formed you? Who gave you wisdom? And now for the last three words, וְכֹחַ מִי יְנִידֶךָ. / Whose power animates you? Whose power makes you move? That's something that the Paytan is asking us to think about, specifically on Rosh Hashanah, the day of creation, the day that God breathed life into man. We should think about this every day, but especially on Rosh Hashanah- Who is energizing us? Who's giving us the strength to move? We will quote three different sources for this concept, each from a different shade of our religion. Working chronologically, we start with the Tomar Devorah, the famous sefer written by Rav Moshe, Cordovero, one of the great Kabbalists of Sfat. He lived from 1522 to 1570 and was actually one of the leaders of Kabbalah, even before the Arizal. In the first chapter of Tomar Devorah when talking about he first Middah of Hashem, he says, אֵין רֶגַע שֶׁלֹּא יִהְיֶה הָאָדָם נִזּוֹן וּמִתְקַיֵּים מִכֹּחַ עֶלְיוֹן הַשּׁוֹפֵעַ עָלָיו. /There's not a moment that a person is not sustained and exists from the heavenly force that is constantly granted upon him. That means we do not live because we're here as independent beings. We will explain further citing a quote from the Baal Shem Tov, Rav Yisrael ben Eliezer (c. 1700 to 1760), the founder of Hasidut , in his sefer Beer Mayim Chaim on Bereshit explaining the pasuk (Tehilim 119 89) לעולם ה' דברך נצב בשמים, /Forever Hashem, Your words are standing in the Shamayim The Baal Shem Tov explains that when a flesh and blood craftsman makes a vessel, he can walk away from the vessel and no matter what energy or wisdom he put into it, his ability no longer impacts it. It's going to stay forever. Why? Because he's made it yesh m'yesh/something from something. He took existing silver and crafted it into the vessel. But Hashem created the world yesh m'eyin/something from nothing. There was nothing there before Him. And therefore, if Hashem, even for a second, decides to cease to pump the energy into it, it will cease to exist. God has to constantly put that energy in to make it be. Thr Baal Shem Tov gives the example of the sun. Why is the sun there? Not just because it's there. No. If you were able to put on spiritual glasses, you'd see the words Yehi Or pumping into the sun. And if those letters Yehi Or went away, the sun would cease to exist. Hashem, every second, is pumping energy Yehi Rakia/let there be a firmament. That's why there's a sky. He says that's what it means L'Olam/Forever Your words are still in the heavens. That means the original ten statements that God said when He created the world are still standing there. And if your eyes were capable of seeing it, you'd see them still there. Lastly, we will quote the Nefesh HaChaim, Rav Chaim of Volozhin (1749 to 1821), the father of the Yeshiva movement. He was a student of the Gaon of Vilna and got everything from him. And he says almost the same thing. Why is Hashem called Elohim, which means the Source of all energy? Because God is different than a regular craftsman that builds a building out of wood, who didn't make the wood, he just formed it. When the craftsman goes away, he goes away. He makes the same point as the Baal Shem Tov: Hashem made something from nothing. And he says, from the time of creation, כל יום וכל רגע ממש. , Every day and every moment, God is keeping it going. And he says that's why Anshei Knessset HaGedolah said המחדש בטובו בכל יום תמיד מעשה בראשית / God renews in His goodness every day constantly, the creation. תמיד ממש כל עת ורגע. /literally every second . And as it says, לעושה אורים גדולים /God is making the great luminaries - in the present tense. Not He made . What does that have to do with us? Humility . In the words of the Hovot Halevavot and of Rav Yehuda Halevi- There's nothing that we do on our own. Our heart is pumping because God is making it pump. In Shir HaShirim 5,2 it says ק֣וֹל ׀ דּוֹדִ֣י דוֹפֵ֗ק / The voice of my beloved is banging , פִּתְחִ / Open up Our pulse is called defek cause the pulse bangs . It pulsates . I once saw a pshat that the pulse is called defek/ banging because Who's the One that's banging and pulsating through our body? It's ק֣וֹל ׀ דּוֹדִ֣י דוֹפֵ֗ק Hashem is making that happen. When we think these thoughts, we realize, What are we doing? Whatever we're doing, whether hitting a ball, making a cake, or making money, Who is energizing me? Who's pumping it into me? Imagine those huge blow up items that flail around in front of stores to get your attention, flapping back and forth. Imagine if it thought to itself, " Wow! look how powerful I am. I'm going back and forth. " Excuse me, sir. There's someone pumping the air into you. You'd be flat on the floor without that thing pumping air into you. And with us, it's even worse because we wouldn't even be that flat plastic on the floor if Hashem wasn't pumping energy into us. These kind of thoughts are humbling, and it's our responsibility to think about them.

The Middah of Ahavas Chesed (Vayeira 5785)

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hashkafa - tomer devorah

We are now in a special miniseries of the 30 pesukim of our Musaf prayers. I went out of order yesterday. ש ְא֤וּ שְׁעָרִ֨ים is actually pasuk #6 Pasuk number five is יְהֹוָ֣ה מָלָךְ֮ גֵּא֢וּת לָ֫בֵ֥שׁ לָבֵ֣שׁ יְ֭הֹוָה עֹ֣ז הִתְאַזָּ֑ר אַף־תִּכּ֥וֹן תֵּ֝בֵ֗ל בַּל־תִּמּֽוֹט׃ (Tehilim 93,1) Hashem Malach Ga'ut Lavesh Hashem will have reigned,He donned or cloaked Himself in ge'ut/ grandeur (or literally arrogance ). Lavesh Hashem Oz Hitazar. Hashem will have girded Himself with might Af Tikon Tevel Bal Timot/He made the world firm that it should not falter. This is obviously a pasuk of Malchuyot (every pasuk of malchuyot / kingdom has the word melech in it except for the 10 th - Shema Israel). So, Hashem Malach/Hashem is King. We say this in our Shir shel Yom . There is a different song for each of the seven days of the week, and we say this song on Fridays because it was first said on a Friday, when Adam HaRishon opened his eyes and said, Hashem Malach. He opened his eyes on the first day and saw, Here I am, a creation in a world that was created by God, Who is the King. Rav Wolbe says, similarly on Rosh Hashanah, when we open our eyes, we should imagine that we just landed here for the first time. And when we look around, we should say, " What is this growing out of the ground? What's this hard, wood-like material? How is it growing? What is going on here ?" We should look at the world in that curious fashion, as if we just got here. And like Adam Harishon, we say, Hashem Malach Ge'ut Lavesh, God the King is wearing a coat of ge'ut , which sounds like arrogance - not a very good. Middah. Why are we calling God arrogant? The truth is, we say in Az Yashir, Ki Ga'oh Ga'ah /God was arrogant over the arrogant, and the explanation is that Arrogance means taking credit for what you did. The Mesilat Yesharim says, Machshiv et Atzmo/You are giving yourself importance, credibility, recognition for what you did. The only problem is you didn't do it. No one can take credit. It's arrogant to take credit for what you didn't do. Only God can take credit. The example that I like to give is a young child learning how to play baseball for the first time. His father lobs him these very easy pitches, and his brother stands behind the plate with the boy, holding the boy's hands around the bat. He gets this easy pitch lobbed to him by his father, and his brother swings the bat with the boy, and hits a line drive. The boy is thrilled. He hit a ball ! He bangs his chest with pride. Any bystander would say, Doesn't this kid get it? They lobbed him the ball. It was such an easy pitch to hit, and he didn't even hit it! His brother was holding his hands over the bat and the brother was the one that swung! That's really what goes on in our lives. I'm talking to myself. We have to constantly remind ourselves that we can't say, Kochi V'Otzem Yadi/My strength and My power caused me to be successful at war or anything else. No. It has nothing to do with you. God gives you the strength. And we know the famous Targum, God gives you the ideas. He gives you the ideas to amass wealth. So it's far, far from us doing anything. And therefore, only God has the right to take credit and, so to say, be arrogant because it's okay for God to be arrogant. There's nothing wrong with that. He is the One and the only one that can truly take credit for anything that happens. Hashem Oz Hitazar/ God girds Himself with Oz/strength Af Tikon Tevel Bal Timot/He made the world firm that it should not falter. This means that even when Hashem is using His power and His strength, at the same time He's making sure that the world continues to exist and run in a proper fashion. There's a beautiful Chida that quotes the Arizal that says the words Ge'ut lavesh גאות לבש rescrambled is go'el Shabbat גואל שבת God will redeem us in the merit of Shabbat. It's known that when Rosh Hashanah comes out on a Shabbat, it's either a great year or a very difficult year. This year was a year that Rosh Hashana came out on Shabbat. What is it about Shabbat that brings the Ge'ulah ? The Chida explains, in this pasuk, that when we keep Shabbat, we are being Modeh/admitting that Hashem created the world. He's king of the world, there's nothing else but Him and the world is all His. Well, if that's the case, and I really believe that, He can forgive any sin. That's why the merit of Shabbat, which is stating all those things, will bring the Geula . Shabbat strengthens that belief and all those beliefs in Hashem's Kingdom- and that causes our sins to be forgiven and that brings the Ge'ulah . The truth is, that's what every Rosh Hashanah is all about, and every Rosh Hashanah we proclaim, God is King, He's in charge , and He can do whatever He's like, and therefore we will be forgiven.

We continue going through the Pesukim of Perek Shira, and today is the song of the vine, the grapevine that produces wine. It's a pasuk in Yeshaya 65,8: כֹּ֣ה ׀ אָמַ֣ר יְהֹוָ֗ה כַּאֲשֶׁ֨ר יִמָּצֵ֤א הַתִּירוֹשׁ֙ בָּֽאֶשְׁכּ֔וֹל וְאָמַר֙ אַל־תַּשְׁחִיתֵ֔הוּ כִּ֥י בְרָכָ֖ה בּ֑וֹ כֵּ֤ן אֶֽעֱשֶׂה֙ לְמַ֣עַן עֲבָדַ֔י לְבִלְתִּ֖י הַֽשְׁחִ֥ית /So said Hashem, Just like when you find that there's some wine in the grape cluster, you don't destroy the grapes, because there is blessing inside the grapes. So too, God says, I will do for my servants, and not to destroy them at all. This pasuk is using the grape with wine inside as a mashal for God watching over the Jewish people. The Targum Yonatan on this pasuk says it refers to Noach. Noach was in the Dor HaMabul/Generation of the Flood but God did not destroy him because of the wine that was inside of him, referring to the future generations that would come out of him. The Radak says that we are talking to the Bnei HaGalut/The children of exile. That's us. Don't give up hope. Don't despair from the redemption, because even though it's a long exile and we're suffering, we will get out and we will come back . This is compared to the grape and the wine inside of it, in that just like we don't want to destroy the grapes or the wine inside them, even though it might have some peels, pits that have no berachah , because we still have wine inside, so too, even though there might be sinners among the Jewish people, there are Sadikim , righteous people, and therefore they will be saved. The Yaavetz, in his commentary on Avot perek ה Mishna ב , talks about the ten generations from Adam until Noach and from Noach until Abraham, and says that the reason God left them wasn't because He forgot them or ignored their sins, but rather because Hashem has Erech Apayim/patience and He waits for the Resha'im . Firstly, because they may do teshuva, and secondly, because they might have righteous children that come out of them. That is why Hashem waited the ten generations from Adam until Noach- for Noach. And He waited ten generations from Noach till Abraham- for Abraham. That's what the Navi means in the story of the grapes- that Hashem, because He loves the wine, keeps the grapes around. God does not destroy the world because of the wicked. But he sees into the future what is going to come out of them. That is how Hashem works. This shows up as well in the case of Moshe Rabbenu. When it was time to kill the Mitzri, it says He saw there was no person , and Rashi explains that it doesn't mean there was nobody watching, but rather, no one would come out of him in the future. This is a Middah of Hashem- Erech Apayim-, which we can think of every time we eat a grape. We're not talking about the best grape. Imagine a soft grape, that's not the greatest tasting grape. We should think, " I can take this grape and make wine." So too, even the people that currently might look like they're wicked, wine be created from them, which means the future generation. To recap, there are two approaches to this pasuk - One is that the current world has a mixture of righteous and wicked people. And God doesn't destroy the world because of the righteous that are there- like the wine in the grape. The second approach is that we're looking at the individual. We see an individual that might seem like a mushy grape, but he has wine inside of him, referring to the future generations that are going to come from him. That's our pasuk of the grapevine- כַּאֲשֶׁ֨ר יִמָּצֵ֤א הַתִּירוֹשׁ֙ בָּֽאֶשְׁכּ֔וֹל וְאָמַר֙ אַל־תַּשְׁחִיתֵ֔הוּ כִּ֥י בְרָכָ֖ה בּ֑וֹ כֵּ֤ן אֶֽעֱשֶׂה֙ לְמַ֣עַן עֲבָדַ֔י לְבִלְתִּ֖י הַֽשְׁחִ֥ית Just like we find wine in the grape and we say, Don't destroy it because there's blessing inside of it (which is the source that you can't destroy food that still has in it a beracha) כֵּ֤ן אֶֽעֱשֶׂה֙ לְמַ֣עַן עֲבָדַ֔י לְבִלְתִּ֖י הַֽשְׁחִ֥ית So too, I do for my servants, not to destroy them entirely.

Mesilat Yesharim 1-8

Moshe wasn't allowed to enter Eretz Yisrael. What did Hashem allow him to do instead? What can we learn from this? Who was Pinchas and what Middah (character trait) did he excel in? How was he rewarded? How was that Middah k'neged Middah (Measure for Measure)?

In this week's episode, David and Modya speak with Rebecca Schliser, a core faculty member at the Institute for Jewish Spirituality and rabbinical student at Aleph, The Alliance for Jewish Renewal. They explore the middah of silence through the stories in parsha Balak and see how a donkey may be more in tune with the Divine than a human by employing silence as a contemplative tool. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Support our show by becoming a premium member! https://newbooksnetwork.supportingcast.fm/new-books-network

In this week's episode, David and Modya speak with Rebecca Schliser, a core faculty member at the Institute for Jewish Spirituality and rabbinical student at Aleph, The Alliance for Jewish Renewal. They explore the middah of silence through the stories in parsha Balak and see how a donkey may be more in tune with the Divine than a human by employing silence as a contemplative tool. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Middah Kenegged Middah (Balak 5784)

On this week's episode, Modya and David are joined by Rabbi David Jaffe, a writer, Mussar teacher, and organizer, to discuss lessons on the middah of harizut (decisiveness) in parshat Beshalah (Ex. 13:17-17:16). Some questions discussed: What does the midrash about Nachshon bring the first to wade into the sea teach us about the line between divine providence and human agency? Why must God garden Pharaoh's heart and seal his fate, and the fate of the Egyptians? How should we understand the situatedness of our decisions, large and small, in the context of our relationships, our obligations, and our communities? Thanks for listening! Modya Silver is an author and psychotherapist based in Toronto. David Gottlieb is a faculty member in the Jewish Studies program at Spertus Institute for Jewish Learning and Leadership in Chicago. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Support our show by becoming a premium member! https://newbooksnetwork.supportingcast.fm/new-books-network

On this week's episode, Modya and David are joined by Rabbi David Jaffe, a writer, Mussar teacher, and organizer, to discuss lessons on the middah of harizut (decisiveness) in parshat Beshalah (Ex. 13:17-17:16). Some questions discussed: What does the midrash about Nachshon bring the first to wade into the sea teach us about the line between divine providence and human agency? Why must God garden Pharaoh's heart and seal his fate, and the fate of the Egyptians? How should we understand the situatedness of our decisions, large and small, in the context of our relationships, our obligations, and our communities? Thanks for listening! Modya Silver is an author and psychotherapist based in Toronto. David Gottlieb is a faculty member in the Jewish Studies program at Spertus Institute for Jewish Learning and Leadership in Chicago. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In our introduction to Moshe Rabeinu, basically all the Torah tells us about the first 80 years of his life is that he was Noseh B'ol with others. Why was this Middah his biggest zechus to become the leader of the Jewish people? How does it differ from empathy and kindness? A little longer this week as I added a small message in honor of the Mashgiach Rav Matisyahu Salomon Zt"l, whose levaya was today.  May we hear Besuros Tovos, and may the Mashgiach be a Meilitz Yosher for us all. Have a good Shabbos

In this shiur, the final shiur delivered to the Shana Bet of Tomer Devorah, Rav Burg explains (based on a piece from Rav Wolbe zt"l) why Yosef HaTzaddik is singled out as having lived in Mitzrayim. The same Yosef HaTzaddik who was a shepherd for his father, is the same Yosef HaTzaddik who is a king in Mitzrayim. How do we stay authentic irrespective of our environment? In this shiur Rav Burg speaks about how Yaakov lived a broad life while Eisav lived a dual life. Yosef, through his Middah of Seder, was the foil for Eisav and stayed true to himself even in the depths of depravity in Mitzrayim.

In this week's episode, Modya and David discuss parshat Va-Yetzei (Gen. 28:10-32:3) and its lessons for the middah (character trait) of patience. Is the patriarch Jacob a model of patience, or does his predilection for deceit suggest a person too eager to get what he wants? What does the matriarch Leah teach us about the relationship between patience and acceptance of what is? Does the matriarch Rachel provide her own lessons? Modya and David look to these tangled, archetypal personalities and relationships for clues on how to develop patience with self and other. Modya Silver is an author and psychotherapist based in Toronto. David Gottlieb is Director of Jewish Studies at the Spertus Institute for Jewish Learning and Leadership in Chicago. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Support our show by becoming a premium member! https://newbooksnetwork.supportingcast.fm/new-books-network

In this week's episode, Modya and David discuss parshat Va-Yetzei (Gen. 28:10-32:3) and its lessons for the middah (character trait) of patience. Is the patriarch Jacob a model of patience, or does his predilection for deceit suggest a person too eager to get what he wants? What does the matriarch Leah teach us about the relationship between patience and acceptance of what is? Does the matriarch Rachel provide her own lessons? Modya and David look to these tangled, archetypal personalities and relationships for clues on how to develop patience with self and other. Modya Silver is an author and psychotherapist based in Toronto. David Gottlieb is Director of Jewish Studies at the Spertus Institute for Jewish Learning and Leadership in Chicago. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Support our show by becoming a premium member! https://newbooksnetwork.supportingcast.fm/jewish-studies

In this week's episode, Modya and David discuss parshat Va-Yetzei (Gen. 28:10-32:3) and its lessons for the middah (character trait) of patience. Is the patriarch Jacob a model of patience, or does his predilection for deceit suggest a person too eager to get what he wants? What does the matriarch Leah teach us about the relationship between patience and acceptance of what is? Does the matriarch Rachel provide her own lessons? Modya and David look to these tangled, archetypal personalities and relationships for clues on how to develop patience with self and other. Modya Silver is an author and psychotherapist based in Toronto. David Gottlieb is Director of Jewish Studies at the Spertus Institute for Jewish Learning and Leadership in Chicago. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this week's episode, Modya and David discuss parshat Va-Yetzei (Gen. 28:10-32:3) and its lessons for the middah (character trait) of patience. Is the patriarch Jacob a model of patience, or does his predilection for deceit suggest a person too eager to get what he wants? What does the matriarch Leah teach us about the relationship between patience and acceptance of what is? Does the matriarch Rachel provide her own lessons? Modya and David look to these tangled, archetypal personalities and relationships for clues on how to develop patience with self and other. Modya Silver is an author and psychotherapist based in Toronto. David Gottlieb is Director of Jewish Studies at the Spertus Institute for Jewish Learning and Leadership in Chicago. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Support our show by becoming a premium member! https://newbooksnetwork.supportingcast.fm/biblical-studies

Middah k'negged Middah

TO WATCH THIS SPEECH ON YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BI12gOOQIag REMEMBER TO CLICK 'SUBSCRIBE' ONCE YOU'RE ON THE YOUTUBE PAGE SO YOU'LL BE NOTIFIED OF ALL FURTHER POSTS “TWiSTED Parenting” is a method developed by Avi Fishoff to guide parents of children in severe crisis. Avi personally trains and guides parents from all over the world. All parents must have their own Daas Torah involved to pasken any shailos that may arise. Avi has many haskamos of leading Gedolim. All services are FREE OF CHARGE. Lessons from this podcast should not be applied across the board or without proper individual guidance from a leading expert in the field of crisis. To SUBSCRIBE the Whatsapp broadcast and receive LOTS of Chizuk: Whatsapp a request to: 718-902-6666 To SUBSCRIBE to the YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/AviFishoffTWiSTEDPARENTiNG/videos