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One of the ways we bring down all the segulot that come from Birkat HaMazon is by saying it with true feelings of hakarat tov. When a person feels genuine appreciation, the power of his words becomes infinitely greater. When Rabbi Aharon of Belz was younger, he used to stay by a certain butcher. The butcher took such good care of the Rabbi, fulfilling his every request with great joy. Years later, the butcher's daughter suddenly became gravely ill, and the doctors were losing hope. Messages were sent to Gedolim to pray for her, and the butcher specifically asked that a message be sent to Rabbi Aharon of Belz. The messenger arrived by Rabbi Aharon on Erev Yom Tov, when there was already a long line of people waiting to see him. Because the matter was urgent, the messenger was allowed to enter immediately. When the Rabbi heard the news, he was just about to place a cube of sugar into his tea. He stopped, paused what he was doing, and began repeating over and over how much that butcher had taken care of him. He spoke at length about the kindness, the warmth, and the generosity he had experienced. Only when he felt a deep, intense sense of hakarat tov did he give the girl a beracha and pray for her refuah shelema. After Yom Tov, the messenger returned with extraordinary news. The girl had made a complete recovery. He added that they later discovered that at the exact moment the Rabbi had given his beracha, the girl appeared to be in her final moments. But then she related that she had seen, in what seemed like a dream, the Rabbi giving her a piece of sugar to eat while blessing her with the most heartfelt beracha. At that moment, everything changed. Baruch Hashem, she recovered fully. Words said with real hakarat tov are unbelievably powerful. In the first beracha of Birkat HaMazon, we acknowledge that Hashem is the One who gives us our parnasah. We need to understand what that truly means. The Gemara speaks about a Hallel called Hallel HaGadol, the Great Hallel. This is the chapter of Tehillim in which we say "Ki l'olam chasdo" twenty-six times. The Gemara asks why it is called Hallel HaGadol. Rabbi Yochanan answers that it is because it includes the words that Hashem gives food to all of His creations. Hashem, who is exalted beyond all comprehension, who resides in the highest heights, personally comes down and takes care of every single one of His creations, ensuring that they always have what to eat. Hashem does not delegate this responsibility to a messenger. He does it Himself, because He loves us so much. The question is asked: this Hallel mentions so many miracles—creating heaven and earth, the sun and the moon, taking us out of Mitzrayim, splitting the sea, leading us through the desert, defeating Sichon and Og. How can it be that of all these miracles, Hashem giving us food is considered the greatest? The sefer Birkat HaMazon BeKavanah explains that all the other miracles were one-time events. But the miracle of feeding every person and every animal is something Hashem performs every second of every day, from the beginning of time until today and beyond. Hashem is "concerned" that all of His billions and trillions of creations have what they need to live. It is a constant miracle that never stops. They say in the name of the Chafetz Chaim that if a person forgot Al HaNissim in the Amidah, the tefillah still counts. But if he did not say in Modim ועל ניסך שבכל יום…שבכל עת , the Amidah does not count. Missing a miracle that happened once can be excused, but failing to recognize the miracles that occur every single day cannot. Hashem is personally taking care of us at every moment. That is why we emphasize in Birkat HaMazon that Hashem has never made us lacking and will never make us lacking. Once we truly recognize this, only then are we ready to say נודה לך -thank You. Only then can our words of gratitude come from the heart. And the more sincerely we feel that thank You, the more powerful it becomes—and the more blessing it draws down into our lives.
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If a person is going through difficulties, the natural reaction is to ask, "Why me? What did I do to deserve this?" He then feels bad about the situation and remains in that state until it goes away. However, if he reacts that way, he is losing out on a golden opportunity. The purpose of this world is to utilize every circumstance that Hashem places a person into to its fullest, and thereby gain eternal life. The Chafetz Chaim writes that the main goodness a person will receive in the future depends on how he reacts to the ways Hashem dealt with him here. If he internalizes that Hashem is always doing the absolute best for him, even though it does not appear that way, he will rise to the greatest levels, and his table in the future will be overflowing with good. The Orchot Tzaddikim writes that if a person performs a mitzvah with joy, his reward is a thousand times greater than if he were to do it as a chore. That joy will give him the merit to have success in his endeavors and to rise in levels of spirituality, to the point that Hashem will reveal secrets to him from above. The joy a person experiences while doing a mitzvah is itself a mitzvah. If a person is experiencing difficulty, he has a mitzvah to accept that Hashem is doing this for his benefit, as stated in the Shulchan Aruch. If he fulfills that mitzvah with joy, it will earn him a thousand times more reward and elevate him tremendously. The Baal Shem Tov writes that when a person is in a state of joy and happiness, he can bring about great salvations. Being depressed and complaining accomplishes nothing, whereas being accepting and joyful can give a person everything. Rabbeinu Yonah writes in Mishlei (perek gimel, pasuk yud alef) that if a person gives much charity and is exceedingly careful in the performance of all the mitzvot, yet is unsuccessful in business and has great difficulty earning parnassah, or experiences other forms of suffering despite being so good, he must strengthen himself in bitachon and accept the way Hashem is dealing with him with love. He must understand that what is happening to him is truly for the best. He says, what the person is experiencing in his life is better than all the wealth, tranquility, and success this world has to offer, because all of that passes in a fleeting moment. This world is so temporary in comparison to the next world, and one moment of pleasure there is better than all the pleasure that can ever be experienced in this world combined. A person does not know what is truly good for him; only Hashem does. Sometimes tranquility is good, and sometimes difficulty is good. Therefore, a person should never be upset with Hashem. Rabbeinu Yonah adds that this attitude is a wondrous level to reach in bitachon, and the reward for it is incomprehensible. I once read a story of a man who was diagnosed with a serious illness. He went through years of treatments, hospital visits, pain, and uncertainty. His livelihood was affected and all of his plans were dissolved, yet no one could believe the attitude he maintained throughout the experience. When people visited him, they expected frustration and anger, but instead they were met with a smile and words of emunah. One day a friend could not hold back any longer and asked him directly, "How do you keep saying Baruch Hashem? You are in so much pain, you have lost so much—don't you feel broken?" He answered, "Yes, it hurts. But pain does not mean Hashem does not love me. It means He trusts me." The doctors and nurses were in awe of his demeanor, and he made a tremendous Kiddush Hashem. Baruch Hashem, he recovered and continues to live his life with joy and emunah. The levels he reached through his acceptance during those few years are levels people often do not reach in decades when everything is going smoothly. We do not ask for difficulties, but if they ever come, we do not want to waste the opportunity. The greatest thing we can do is accept them with love and emunah.
On Asarah B'Tevet Nebuchadnezzar laid siege to Yerushalayim, the beginning of the process that eventually led to the destruction of the First Beit HaMikdash. On this fast day, part of our avodah is introspection—looking inward and correcting the very issues that caused that destruction in the first place. The Gemara in Masechet Yoma teaches that the First Beit HaMikdash was destroyed because the people were steeped in the three cardinal aveirot. Yet the Gemara in Masechet Nedarim tells us something deeper. The Nevi'im and the Chachamim could not understand the root cause of the churban until Hashem Himself revealed it: the people had "left His Torah." And the Gemara explains that this means they did not say the berachot on the Torah before learning it. The mefarshim explain that this was not a technical oversight. If they had viewed Torah learning the way it is meant to be viewed, as something that truly warrants a berachah, then the Torah itself would have elevated them. It would have refined them spiritually and protected them from sinking to the point of committing those terrible aveirot. The Bach, in siman מז in Orach Chaim, explains the matter with great depth. Hashem's intention in commanding us to delve into Torah study is that our neshamot should become one with Him in this world. The Torah contains within it the kedushah of the One who created it. When we learn Torah with the proper intention, we become a place where Hashem can rest His Shechinah. Hashem desires to be down here with us, as close as possible. It is up to us to make ourselves into a vessel that can receive His Presence. That vessel is formed specifically through deep, sincere engagement with the holy words of Torah. But in the generation of the First Beit HaMikdash, Torah was being learned for other reasons. Some learned because it was enjoyable. Some learned only to know the halachot they needed. Some learned to demonstrate their intellectual ability. But they were not learning in order to absorb the kedushah of Hashem, to become a מקום להשראת השכינה , a place where the Shechinah could rest. Without that inner מקום , the connection to HaKadosh Baruch Hu weakened. And if there is no inner dwelling place for Hashem within the people, there is no reason for a physical dwelling place to remain standing either. The Bach concludes that when a person prepares to learn Torah and recites Birkat HaTorah, he should have in mind deep gratitude: that Hashem chose us to share His holy Torah with , and that through it He enables us to attach ourselves to Him. How fortunate we are that Hashem wants to be close to us. Because we are physical beings, it is difficult to attach ourselves to the spiritual. So Hashem gave us the Torah, which is spiritual, and through it we ourselves become elevated and spiritual, capable of clinging to Him. The deeper we immerse ourselves in Torah, the more kedushah it brings into us. But only if it is learned with the right intentions. When a person is truly connected to Hashem, he gains tremendous strength. He can overcome the tests that the yetzer hara places before him. The spiritual light of Torah provides the energy, motivation, and excitement to live a life of Torah and mitzvot. On Asarah B'Tevet, we are fasting not only for a siege that took place long ago, but for the loss of that inner connection. We are reminded that the Beit HaMikdash was destroyed not because Torah was absent, but because Torah was no longer serving its true purpose. Let us appreciate the gift of Torah and learn it as much as we can, with the intention of drawing closer to Hashem through it, and making ourselves worthy vessels for His Presence once again.
Finding True Quiet
Welcome to our daily Bitachon. Today is a special class for Asarah B'Tevet. As we know, today is a fast day—a significant day commemorating the siege laid against Yerushalayim and the eventual destruction of the first Beit HaMikdash. I use the word 'commemoration' loosely, because today isn't just about remembering the past; it's about taking action in the present. It is interesting to note the other readings that coincide with Asarah B'Tevet every year. In Parshat Vayigash , we always read about Yosef and his brothers reuniting. Furthermore, in last week's Haftarah , the prophet Yechezkel received a message from God to perform a miracle: Take one piece of wood and write 'Yehudah' on it. Take another and write 'Yosef.' When you hold them together, they will miraculously fuse into one. When the people ask for the symbolism behind this, tell them that in the future, the house of Yehudah (representing the Davidic line) and the house of Yosef (representing the ten tribes who separated) will finally be reunited when Mashiach comes. Where did this division begin? While the Gemara attributes the destruction of the first Temple to the three cardinal sins—idolatry, immorality, and bloodshed—the fundamental 'rupture' started earlier. After Shlomo HaMelech passed away, his son Rechavam took the throne. However, Yerovam ben Nevat, from the tribe of Ephraim (descended from Yosef), broke away to start a separate kingdom. This split was the true beginning of the downfall of the Jewish people. As the Gemara in Shabbat 56b notes, the people would not have turned to idolatry had it not been for this division; it was Yerovam who introduced the two golden calves to solidify the split. This breakdown happened in Shechem. Rashi points out that Shechem is a place predestined for tragedy: it is where Yosef was sold by his brothers and where the kingdom eventually fractured. This is why Asarah B'Tevet always coincides with these Torah portions. While Tisha B'Av marks the actual destruction and the later sin of sinat chinam (baseless hatred) during the second Temple, Asarah B'Tevet focuses on the beginnings . The siege began today. The first cracks in our foundation appeared today. And those cracks were rooted in a lack of brotherly love. The Yaarot Devash notes a fascinating calculation: the day God decreed that Kayin would be a wanderer for killing his brother, Hevel, was Asarah B'Tevet. This day has been rooted in the theme of exile due to broken brotherhood since the dawn of history—from Kayin and Hevel to Yosef and his brothers. Therefore, Asarah B'Tevet is a time for introspection. Ask yourself: How can I work on my 'brotherly love'? Which family members am I disengaged from? Which relationships can I repair? This fast is not just about abstaining from food; it is about examining our deeds and fixing our connections with one another. Have a tzom kal (an easy fast)."
If a man is betrayed by someone he trusted, the pain can be overwhelming. Imagine he is told about a great business opportunity, and with complete trust he invests most of his life savings. Later, he discovers that it was all a lie. He was cheated. The money is gone, with no way to recover it. Beyond the financial loss, the deeper pain sets in. How could such injustice take place? It seems as if the thieves live happily ever after, while the innocent, unassuming person is left to suffer for nothing. But we know this is never the full story. Hashem is always in charge. No one can take a single dollar from a person unless it was meant for him to lose it, and no one can keep a dollar unless it was meant for him to have it. Hashem is the perfect Judge. No one ever gets away with anything in this world. It may look like evil prospers, but that appearance itself is part of the test. Every single action a person does is accounted for. Nothing slips through the cracks. When Titus HaRasha stabbed the parochet at the time of the destruction of the Beit HaMikdash and blood appeared to flow from it, he believed he had overpowered Hashem. It looked like evil had triumphed. But in the end, Hashem sent the smallest creature—a gnat—to eat away at Titus's brain until he died. Justice was exact, measured, and unavoidable. The Mitzrim seemed to have their way with the Jewish people in Mitzrayim for generations. It appeared as if cruelty and oppression ruled unchecked. Yet when the time for retribution came, every Mitzri received exactly what he deserved. Even those who drowned in the Yam Suf did not all die the same way. Some sank like lead, some like stone, and some like straw. Each death was calibrated precisely according to what that person deserved. Hashem's justice is exact down to the smallest detail. Every single thing that happens to a person, every minute of the day, is calculated with perfect precision based on his deeds. It is almost never obvious that something is happening because of what a person did. We label events as "natural," but those who understand know there is nothing natural about life. Everything is Hashem. The Yerushalmi relates that one Leil Shabbat, Rabbi Chanina ben Dosa was eating his Shabbat seudah when suddenly his table collapsed. He did not ask if a screw was loose or if the wood had weakened. Instead, he asked his Rebbetzin what might have caused this spiritually. She then remembered that she had borrowed spices from a neighbor and forgot to take off ma'aser. Rabbi Chanina ben Dosa immediately did what was necessary according to halacha to rectify it, and the table fixed itself on the spot. He knew that even if there was a physical reason, that was never the true cause. The cause was always Hashem. When Yosef's brothers were treated harshly by the viceroy of Mitzrayim, they did not say, "Look at this antisemitism." They said, "We are guilty because of what we did to Yosef." They understood that a viceroy has no power of his own. It was Hashem giving them kaparah. And notice how exact that kaparah was. Shimon, who wanted Yosef killed, was the only brother taken to prison. Levi, who was next in suggesting harm, was the one who found his money in his sack and had to endure additional agony. Yehudah, who suggested selling Yosef, suffered the torment of thinking Binyamin would not return and that he would be held responsible. Every detail was measured. Hashem is exacting. It may take days, months, or even years, but everyone always gets exactly what he deserves. Sometimes events happen to correct something from a previous lifetime. We don't know the calculations, but we know they are perfect. Hashem arranges everything so we can fulfill our mission in this world and live eternally with true bliss. The Shomer Emunim teaches that when something happens that appears to be a kaparah, a person should tell Hashem that he accepts it fully and knows he deserves it. That avodah elevates a person tremendously and can spare him from additional yesurim. We never need to worry about what others do or whether they are getting away with anything. That is Hashem's department—and He is the most righteous and perfect Judge.
Learn about Hashem's kindness and Mercy. Learn His Torah. Think deeply about Yosef's life. All will help one's growth in Bitachon.
A baal emunah is able to stay calm and composed no matter what type of adversity he is facing. The reason is because he knows for a fact that Hashem was the cause of it, and it is for his best. This attitude is much harder to have when it appears that he is in the difficult position due to other people. There, the yetzer hara tries to convince him that if it wasn't for that other person, he would not be in the position that he is in now. Yosef HaTzaddik, who was a master ma'amin, exemplified the great mida of this type of emunah, when he finally revealed himself to his brothers in this week's parasha, Vayigash . His brothers had planned to kill him, then sold him as a slave, taking him away from his father for years. He had been through so much hardship. And then he told his brothers not to feel bad about any of it because it was Hashem who used them as His messenger to bring him to the place He wanted him to be in. Yosef then hugged and kissed every one of his brothers. This is a tremendous level to reach. There are people who are able to accept the difficulties caused to them by others, but only after they see the benefits that came about as a result of them. The greatest rewards are reserved for those who are able to be calm and accepting even during the darkness when there are no benefits apparent. Rabbi Zilberstein told a story that he witnessed first-hand when he took his father to a clinic for a small procedure. There was a lot of commotion going on in one particular area and everyone realized it. When Rabbi Zilberstein inquired about it, he was told what happened. A man was there to get a couple of his teeth pulled. During the procedure, the doctor accidentally knocked one of his teeth and it went to the back of the man's throat. It was a sharp tooth which could have caused considerable damage to his lungs. The man's children, who accompanied him there, were horrified at what was happening. Specialists were called in and, eventually, they got the tooth out. Afterward, they did an x-ray on that area to make sure there was no damage and they found in the x-ray a very small, cancerous growth which was in its infant stages. They immediately took it out. The doctor said that type of growth is extremely dangerous and doesn't take too long to start doing damage. The fact that they caught it then saved this man's life. After we see the good in that doctor's "mistake" it's very easy to have emunah that it was Hashem who caused that tooth to be knocked out. But who would be able to stay calm and have full emunah that Hashem was the one behind it during the dark time, before they found the growth, when it looked like the patient was going to be negatively affected to no fault of his own? It's not good enough to believe it was Hashem only after the fact. We have to work on ourselves to believe it's Hashem the entire time. In the future, Hashem is going to show us why every single event that happened to every single individual was only because of Him for the best reasons possible. But then it will be too late to have emunah. Then it will be called ידיעה – not faith but knowledge. Now is our time to shine. We are never in any particular circumstance because of what somebody else did. We are only there because of Hashem. The more we are able to internalize this, the more peace of mind we'll have and the greater heights we'll reach. Shabbat Shalom.
There was a man who prided himself on being extremely careful with a particular stringency in halachah. One morning, he realized that in order to keep that stringency exactly the way he wanted, he would have to compromise in another area of halachah. At first, he hesitated. Something didn't sit right. But then he reassured himself that what he was doing was correct and well-intentioned. Later that day, he related what he had done to a rabbi. The rabbi listened carefully and then asked him a simple question: "Who were you trying to please by doing that stringency?" The man was taken aback. He paused and then answered, "Hashem, of course." The rabbi then asked him, "Do you really believe that the same Hashem who commanded you not to compromise that halachah is happier with you because you were extra careful somewhere else? Do you think Hashem says, 'I'm glad you ignored Me here because you were stricter there'?" The man immediately understood. He thanked the rabbi for setting him straight. The rabbi then continued, "Hashem does not want us to choose which parts of the Torah to protect and which parts to bend. If a stringency requires a person to trample another halachah, it is no longer a stringency. It may make the person feel more religious, but he is no longer serving Hashem. He is serving his own sense of what feels right." Sometimes a person becomes so focused on what he is accustomed to doing that he forgets who he is doing it for. This mistake often comes from good intentions. A person wants to grow. He wants to feel more connected. But somewhere along the way, the focus subtly shifts from What does Hashem want? to What do I feel is more meaningful? And once that happens, a person may feel very spiritual while actually drifting away from the true ratzon Hashem. A person may feel that it is so important to give large amounts of tzedakah that he justifies not paying back people he owes money to so that he can fulfill his tzedakah goals. Another person may feel that it is so important to keep a certain chumrah that he compromises on patience, derech eretz, or sensitivity along the way. Others may feel that mitzvot between man and Hashem are more important than mitzvot between man and man—forgetting that all 613 mitzvot were given by the same Hashem, who wants them all fulfilled properly. When a person compromises one halachah to enhance another, he may unknowingly be serving his ego rather than Hashem. The stringency may make him feel elevated, disciplined, or distinct, while the compromised halachah feels less visible or less emotionally rewarding. But Hashem is not impressed by how we feel about a mitzvah. Hashem is pleased when we submit ourselves to His will—even when it doesn't feel dramatic or special. Growth in Torah and mitzvot does not come from choosing which mitzvah shines brighter in our eyes, but from humbly accepting that every single halachah matters, because each one is an expression of Hashem's will. When we remember who we are serving, everything changes. The question we must constantly ask ourselves is: What does Hashem want from me? And very often, that question is not simple to answer. That is why it is so important to have a rabbi to ask. If we truly want to serve Hashem, we will never hesitate to ask questions—even if we are afraid the answer may not align with what we were hoping to do. We always want to do what the Boss wants us to do. When that mindset guides us, and we sincerely seek da'at Torah, we can be confident that we are truly serving Hashem—and that is real success.
Welcome to daily bittachon . We're in חובות הלבבות שער הבחינה, Chapter 3. And he now tells us that the signs of wisdom in creation show up in three types of areas. Area number one is signs that are quite apparent to everybody, and even the fool pick up on them, surely the wiser people. And his example is the sun. The power of the sun to light up the lands, to heat up the lands. And he quotes pesukim to that effect. The sun comes up, the sun goes out, people go to work, and this is wonders of wonders. And Rabbeinu Bechaye points out something very interesting. He says, we only think about the sun if we have a vegetable patch. That was his mashal . Or I'll add, we think about the sun if we have a wedding, especially an outdoor wedding. I don't want it to rain, I want a nice sunny day. Or I'm going on vacation, I want there to be sun. Hold on, that's all you care about is your vegetable patch and your wedding? Do you not realize that without the sun, everything in the world would cease to exist? We would freeze to death. There'd be no plants growing without the photosynthesis. Sun is extremely important, yet we don't think about it at all. Point number one. Rabbeinu Bechaye made another point, where he asks his students: Why don't we make a berachah on the sun? If the sun is so important, we should be making a berachah every single day. We should say just like borei pri ha'etz , borei et hashemesh . We should thank Hashem for the sun. Voice said, "Hey, that's a great question." And his answer was, "We do! יוצר אור ובורא חושך." Every day we talk about the light and the darkness. Yotzeir hame'orot . God created the luminaries. It's in our daily prayers. How many people think about that? Just like I'm taking an apple and take a bite out of the apple, I make a berachah first. Take a bite out of the sun every morning. I'm appreciating the sun, I'm taking a berachah for it. But again, not only don't we appreciate the sun, Rabbeinu was adding, we don't even appreciate the blessing on the sun that we make to remind us of the sun. So we have a lot of hard work to do in appreciation of the wonders that Hashem made. And we'll be talking some time about the sun. Now again, for those people that are not science buffs and are not interested in these things, there are a lot of great shiurim to listen to, but if you're interested in, then we'll talk about it. So first of all, what is the sun made out of? What is the sun exactly? It's very large, it's the source of all energy and life on earth. It's 109 times the size of the earth. And what's it made of exactly? It's made of 73% hydrogen, 25% helium, with some other small quantities of oxygen, carbon, neon and iron. And this, these gases are constantly burning. Now I was bothered by a question when I was preparing this class because you're supposed to be curious. How does this mass of gas just stay together? Why doesn't it just dissipate? If you have gas, what's holding it together? Good question. And to come to the end of the story, the sun is really a self-sustaining furnace where gravity holds the fuel in place and the energy from burning that fuel creates the pressure needed to counteract gravity. What's that mean? That means gravity holds it together, that's why it doesn't spread out, but then the energy that's burning causes it to go against gravity and that's why it shines. If the gravity would hold it in, it would never shine. So it's this interesting effect of the gravity holding it in and the heat created allowing the sun's energy to shine out. Let's say it in a little bit more scientific terms: the gravity pulls it inward, and the nuclear fusion in the core creates the outward pressure, and this stable balance is called hydrostatic equilibrium that prevents the gas from dissipating and allowing the fusion to occur in the hot dense plasma. And this self-regulation has been going on for thousands of years. Now what is gravity pray tell? This inward pull? What is that? What does that mean? Gravity? And the answer is, gravity is another way of saying Hashem . That's what gravity is. The sun is another way of saying Hashem . Ham'ir la'aretz . God is the one that shines the sun. And this is an unbelievable thought that the Maharsha ... The Maharsha says. We're all familiar with the story of the great רבי מאיר בעל הנס. Where he made a miracle. What was the miracle? The miracle was he was going to redeem his the daughter of רבי חנינא בן תרדיון who was taken captive. And he paid somebody off and gave him the ability to withstand whatever pressure he had and he said if you get stuck say the following words: Elaka D'Meir Aneini . The God of Meir answer me. Now this is very strange. Rabbis don't go bragging and saying the God of Meir, me. And we say Elaka D'Meir Aneini , at least many people say that without saying Elaka Di'Rebbi Meir . Are you calling him by his first name just because he said Elaka D'Meir Aneini ? And the Maharsha says Meir does not mean Rebbi Meir . Meir means God who is Meir , God that causes the sun to shine. That's what it means: Elaka D'Meir Aneini . God is the one that makes the sun shine. So you see the sun shining on you, God's shining on you because there is no explanation why these gases stay together and don't just dissipate into the atmosphere. It's a wonder of wonders. There's no ball in the middle, you think oh the sun's like this hard ball in the middle and it's a hot hard ball, no it's not. It's all gas. There's no if you'd have a plane that would be heat resistant it would fly right through the sun, there's nothing there. I don't know how many people think about that. The sun has nothing there, it's not like the earth that has a hard mass. There's nothing there. It's just gas staying together with gravity and having this self-regulation and burning for thousands of years. Wonders of wonders.
When a person is in need of a yeshuah, whether big or small, he must remember one simple truth: Hashem can bring it in an instant, and He has unlimited ways of doing so. Our job is not to pressure the messengers, argue with the intermediaries, or become consumed with how it will happen. Our job is to speak to the Sender. Very often, it is our spiritual hishtadlut that opens doors that once seemed firmly locked. A man related that he was part of a kollel with several learning tracks. Each track had a different style and focus. Once someone committed to a particular track, it was extremely difficult to switch before a certain amount of time passed. This individual chose a track that he soon realized was not right for him. When he discovered another track that felt perfectly suited to his abilities and learning style, he strongly wanted to transfer. He approached the person in charge, but was denied and reminded of the rules. So he continued learning every day, accepting that Hashem had placed him in this situation. He understood that the test was to continue learning Torah even when it was difficult, even when it wasn't in the style that fulfilled his heart's desire. One day, he shared his struggle with a friend. The friend asked him a simple question: "Did you pray to switch?" He realized that he hadn't. Immediately, he began to pray. In addition to mentioning it in his regular tefillot, he began saying Tehillim every day, specifically asking Hashem to help him switch tracks to the one he wanted. Some time later, several people were allowed to switch into that very track. Encouraged, he went back to the person in charge and asked again. Once more, he was denied. This time, instead of becoming frustrated or pleading with the administrator, he made a quiet decision: I'm not going to argue with messengers. I'm going to keep speaking to the One truly in charge. Not long after, one morning on his way to kollel, a man pulled up beside him and offered him a ride. During the conversation, the topic of kollel came up, and he mentioned his desire to switch tracks. When he said the name of the person in charge, the driver replied that he knew him very well and would try to help. Within a few days, the switch was approved. This man didn't waste his energy fighting the messengers. He spoke directly to the Boss, and Hashem sent him exactly the messenger he needed. Another man, an electrician, related that he sat at home for two full days with no work at all. He and his wife sat together, trying to strengthen their emunah, when he received an email from someone asking for help with hachnasat kallah. They spoke it over and decided that tzedakah would be their hishtadlut. They donated $250, in addition to the $118 they had given someone else just an hour earlier. They said that the $368 they had just given would count as the ma'aser for the parnassah that Hashem would send them. The very next day, he received several job calls and earned a total of $3,675—almost exactly the amount that would require the ma'aser they had already given the day before. Hashem can bring the right messengers in a moment. A rabbi told me that a student flew him in from Eretz Yisrael to serve as the mesader kiddushin at his wedding. When the rabbi arrived at the airport, he briefly left his belongings to use the restroom. When he returned, he noticed his hat was gone. He searched everywhere, but it had vanished. The wedding was only hours away, and the city he was in had no stores that sold hats. On the way to the wedding hall, he called a relative who lived in that city and asked what he should do. The relative told him to come to his house immediately. When he arrived, the relative handed him a brand-new hat, still in its box. It was almost identical to the one he had lost and fit him perfectly. The relative explained that seven months earlier, his son had bought a hat in New York and gone straight to the airport afterward. When he got home, he realized the wrong hat had been placed in the box. It didn't fit him, and they had no idea what to do with it. The hat sat unused in their home for months. Now, at the exact moment this rabbi needed a hat, it was waiting for him. Hashem uses His messengers at all times, in all places, often long before we even realize we'll need them. Our main hishtadlut is always with Him.
Welcome to our daily Bitachon . We're back on track with our Sha'ar Bechina . We left off talking about a principle that everything that we have in the world is made of smaller building blocks that are built up and then they are broken down into their particles and start the cycle again. And he asks of us to analyze this. And I'd like to give a very simple example. Again, these are things that for those that are not interested in science class, this might not be for you. But it's a responsibility for all of us to look into these things. Anyone that ever listened to Rabbi Miller knows that he was intoxicated with the concept of an apple. And he spoke about an apple a lot. We're going to talk about something. I didn't hear it directly from him, but I'm sure he would be happy with this as well. So what happens when you eat an apple? How does your the apple go in your mouth and get absorbed in your system? And here's the journey. It starts in the mouth. In the mouth, we start with what we'll call the mash, like a mashed potato, mashed apple. There's throughout this system, which is very interesting, there's a physical component and a chemical component. And I'll explain. The physical component is you chew the apple and break it into smaller pieces. That's physical. There's a chemical component, which is your saliva has enzymes, one of them known as amylase, which starts to break down some of the apple's carbohydrates into simple sugars in your mouth already. It means your saliva is a separate discussion that Chovot Halevavot talks about about the multiple tasks of given things that we have in our system. Besides the saliva lubricating your mouth and helping the food go down and you don't have another fact you don't have a dry mouth and your palate sticking to your tongue, the saliva also contains these enzymes. That's the first step. Then it goes to the stomach, which we'll call the acid bath. And again, there's something physical that the stomach muscles churn the apple pieces mixing it with the digestive juices, similar to your washing machine that spins around. And then, and that's sometimes you have cramps in your stomach because your stomach is churning. And then we have the chemical aspect, which is there's glands in your stomach lining. That means it's a washing machine that releases detergent at the same time. Wonder of wonders. The glands that are in your stomach lining release strong acid and enzymes. And this creates this acidic semi-liquid mixture called chyme, spelled C-H-Y-M-E. At this point, the apple's fiber and some of the other parts remain intact. So it's the first stage. Then we go on to the small intestine, which we'll call the nutrient factory. Again, there's a physical aspect, the contractions of the small intestine move the chyme through the intestine, mixing it thoroughly. We know that this contraction is called peristalsis, which is a wonder in itself that you can stand on your head and the food will still go in the proper direction. It's not gravity, but it's the muscle contractions that move it down. And then we have a chemical aspect as well. The pancreas and liver send in more juices. That means this is not coming from the stomach lining, this is coming from an outside factory. And powerful enzymes, and they break down the apple's carbohydrates and proteins and fat components back into their basic building blocks. And this is our key point. We are now getting into the basic building blocks, the glucose and amino acids. And then, once we've broken it down into these tiny nutrient molecules, they're absorbed through the intestinal walls into your bloodstream, which carries them to your body's cells for energy. So this is important. This is where the real breakdown happens. We get things into the microscopic size and they could be absorbed. Our next step is the large intestine or the colon, which is the waste collector. The leftover material, the undigestible fiber that and other parts that resisted earlier digestion, now move into the large intestine. Again, there's a chemical aspect. There's trillions of gut bacteria in the colon that ferment the fiber, breaking it down in a process similar to brewing, like you brew beer. And it produces beneficial byproducts that help you keep your gut healthy. And again, there's more absorption, this time mostly the remaining water, which helps solidify the waste. And finally, the elimination where the solid waste material that is not digested is moved into the. final area and it's expelled from the body. Wonder of wonders what just happened to a simple apple? And when you say borei pri ha'eitz and בורא נפשות רבות וחסרונם there's what to think about. And again this is what we need to do in sha'ar habechina . It's beautiful if you think about it to appreciate all these different things that are happening on a daily basis and it's happening without us even thinking about it. I can't say without exerting energy. It does exert energy, not energy that you're feeling like lifting weights, but there's energy that's why you burn calories when you digest things. That's why we all know that you can't go running after you ate because the blood is necessary and the energy is necessary for the digestive system. So without you knowing while you're sleeping all this digestion is happening and beautiful things that you don't even
Hashem Provides Strength
Parashat Mikez מקץ BITACHON . خنوکا روز پنجاهم بالاتر از טבע by Rabbi Benjamin Lavian
Hashem Provides Strength
Rabbi Menashe Reizman shared a beautiful idea from the Or HaChaim that we can take with us as the days of Chanukah come to an end. One of the central components of lighting the Nerot Chanukah is pirsumei nisa—publicizing the miracle. But this raises a question. The miracle that the oil lasted for eight days is common knowledge among Jews. Why, then, is there such an emphasis on publicizing it? Usually, the need to publicize something is when the message is not yet well known. The Ramban, at the end of Parashat Bo, explains that when Hashem performs open miracles, the purpose is not only the miracle itself, but what we are meant to learn from it. We are meant to internalize that just as Hashem performs revealed miracles, He is equally behind all the hidden miracles that take place every second of our lives. That is the true message we are meant to publicize. Not merely that oil burned for eight days, but that Hashem is behind everything that happens in this world, at every moment. In this week's Parashah, Vayigash, when Yaakov Avinu hears that Yosef is still alive, the pasuk says וַיָּפָג לִבּוֹ כִּי לֹא הֶאֱמִין - that his heart did not believe them. Rashi explains that although Yaakov physically heard the words, his heart was not yet ready to internalize the reality. This happens to us very often. With our mouths, we say that we believe Hashem is in charge of everything that happens in the world. But when we look honestly at the way we live, it becomes clear that our hearts have not fully internalized that belief. If we truly believed that only Hashem runs everything, why do we get so angry when things don't go our way? Why do we become upset at people when they hurt us? Why don't we invest more effort into tefillah? Why are we late to tefillah? If Hashem is the only One in control, then He is the only One we need to impress. If HaKadosh Baruch Hu alone decides our parnassah, then why do we feel pressured to run out of davening for a business meeting? The Nerot Chanukah are there to remind us that Hashem's presence fills every detail of life. Hashem decided that a small amount of oil would burn for eight days. Oil does not burn on its own—it burns only because Hashem wills it to burn. He also made a small group of Jews defeat the mighty Greek army. The Greeks wanted us to believe that the world runs on autopilot, that everything happens naturally. Unfortunately, this belief still exists today. People see weather patterns and global warming, but they don't see Hashem behind every raindrop, every gust of wind, and every change in temperature. When someone loses a business deal, he sees the person who took it away, not Hashem. When someone gains a good opportunity, he credits the person who gave it, not Hashem. We must know with absolute clarity that no human being has any power to help or harm us. No one can use their free will to affect our lives unless Hashem decrees it. But because we are constantly involved in hishtadlut—searching for the best doctor, the best shadchan, the best deal—we easily become absorbed in the effort itself. We begin to believe that success comes from our actions or from the people we rely on, and we forget Who is truly running everything. The message of the Nerot Chanukah is that Hashem alone is behind it all. Someone who has not yet married off his children may still believe that shidduchim depend on shadchanim and networking. But someone who has already married off his children knows with absolute clarity and without the slightest doubt that HaKadosh Baruch Hu alone does everything. There are people who send their children to one yeshivah instead of another out of fear that it might, quote-unquote, "damage shidduchim." But what does that really mean? Hashem brings the shidduch, and He would never want us to do something that is not truly beneficial for our child. One of the clearest indicators of whether we truly believe in Hashem's control is the way we engage in hishtadlut. May we be zocheh to take the light of the Nerot Chanukah with us throughout the year—to move our emunah from our lips into our hearts—and to live with a deep, internalized belief in Hashem's absolute control over everything that happens.
From the Inside Out: With Rivkah Krinsky and Eda Schottenstein
Send us a textFinding Light in Darkness: A Chanukah Special with Esther SitbonIn this Chanukah episode of 'From The Inside Out with Rivkah Krinsky and Eda Schottenstein, we discuss the profound themes of light, purpose, and resilience in the face of darkness. Joined by special guest Esther Sitbon, founder and director of Lahaalot, the conversation delves into the challenges and emotional journeys that define their spiritual lives. The episode reflects on the impact of recent tragic events in Sydney and how the teachings of Chanukah can guide us through difficult times. Esther shares her personal journey of discovering her Jewish identity, the importance of Bitachon (trust in Hashem), and the transformative power of bringing light into the world. This inspiring discussion is dedicated to empowering women to elevate their consciousness and live meaningful, connected lives.EPISODE SPONSORSKOSHER TRAVELERSAs Jews around the world are starting to think about the upcoming Pesach, we're grateful to have Kosher Travelers as the sponsor of this episode and to spotlight their Pesach 2026 experience on the Greek island of Rhodes. This thoughtfully curated program combines authentic Yiddishkeit with a breathtaking Mediterranean setting, offering a warm, Chabad-friendly environment that feels soulful, personal, and deeply meaningful. The Rhodes program attracts a diverse, thoughtful crowd of families, couples, and individuals who value depth and quality, alongside an exceptional gourmet culinary experience, outstanding speakers, and engaging Yom Tov programming. One of the major advantages is peace of mind—multiple Sedarim, full Yom Tov coverage, and a strong kids and teen program allow guests to truly be present without the stress of Pesach preparation. With pricing based on double occupancy rather than per person, it also offers outstanding value, along with the kind of personal attention that makes you feel part of a community, not just a guest. To learn more about Pesach 2026 in Rhodes, and get their current special price of 12 nights for the price of 10, visit koshertravelers.com.View Kosher Travelers upcoming trips and learn more here: https://koshertravelers.com/GUEST BIOEsther Sitbon is a teacher, speaker, and community builder based in Miami, and the founder of OT (Orot Torah), a global platform dedicated to helping Jewish women reconnect to their inner light through Torah, trust, and purpose. With over 17 years of experience guiding women from diverse backgrounds, Esther is known for her warmth, depth, and ability to bridge spiritual wisdom with real life. Through her Torah classes, women's midrasha, podcast, and magazine, she empowers women to become lamplighters—revealing their own light and helping others do the same.Follow along with Esther and hear her message here: https://www.instagram.com/esther_sitbon/CHAPTERS00:00 Introduction to Purpose and Light01:31 Sydney Massacre and Chanukah Reflections05:35 This Pesach!08:51 Meet Esther Sitbon11:09 Esther's Journey and Mission15:38 Challenges and Trust in Hashem27:37COMMUNITYJoin the Community! Connect with us on socials to discuss Episode 101, share insights, and continue the conversations you want to have:
Living Emunah 2867 The Perfect Measure of Hishtadlut The Midrash at the beginning of this week's parashah says: אַשְׁרֵי הַגֶּבֶר אֲשֶׁר שָׂם ה' מִבְטַחוֹ "Fortunate is the man who places his trust in Hashem." This refers to Yosef, who wholeheartedly trusted in Hashem. The Midrash continues: וְלֹא פָנָה אֶל רְהָבִים — "and he did not turn to the arrogant," which also refers to Yosef, who did not rely on the Sar HaMashkim for help when he was in jail. Yet it also says that because Yosef told the Sar HaMashkim, זְכַרְתַּנִי — "remember me," נִתוֹסַף לוֹ שְׁתֵּי שָׁנִים — two more years were added to his sentence. The mefarshim ask: the Midrash seems to contradict itself. On one hand, it praises Yosef for relying only on Hashem and not on the Sar HaMashkim; on the other hand, it says he was punished for asking the Sar HaMashkim to remember him. Furthermore, the word נִתוֹסַף sounds positive — like תּוֹסֶפֶת כְּתֻבָּה — as if staying longer in prison was somehow beneficial. Rav Leib Diskin explained the following. There is a pasuk in Mishlei: בְּטַח אֶל ה' בְּכָל לִבֶּךָ וְאֶל בִּינָתְךָ אַל־תִּשָּׁעֵן "Trust in Hashem with all your heart, and do not rely on your own understanding." (Mishlei 3:5) The Gaon explains that this pasuk refers to the highest form of bitachon — when a person needs no hishtadlut at all, like Chizkiyahu HaMelekh, when Hashem wiped out 185,000 soldiers while Chizkiyahu slept in his bed. But there is another pasuk: וּבֵרַכְתִּיךָ בְּכֹל אֲשֶׁר תַּעֲשֶׂה "I will bless you in all that you do." (Devarim 15:18) From here we learn that we must act , and then Hashem will bless our efforts. This sounds like full hishtadlut is always required, contradicting the pasuk in Mishlei. Then there is a third pasuk in Tehillim that reconciles the two: גּוֹל אֶל־ה' דַּרְכֶּךָ וּבְטַח עָלָיו וְהוּא יַעֲשֶׂה "Roll your way upon Hashem, and trust in Him, and He will do." (Tehillim 37:5) The word גּוֹל — roll — is the key.: משל למה הדבר דומה ? If someone wants to roll a barrel down a hill, all he must do is give it the initial push — and then it rolls on its own. This is how our hishtadlut must be viewed. We give the minimal beginning effort, showing that we know Hashem is the One accomplishing everything afterward. But if a person keeps checking every second to ensure the barrel rolls exactly as he wants, then he believes that his push is what makes everything happen, and he thinks he must constantly control the outcome. Proper hishtadlut means giving an effort that demonstrates that we recognize that Hashem is the One accomplishing.. That was Yosef's level. It was clear hashgachah that the Sar HaMashkim was placed with Yosef in jail, that Hashem gave him a dream, and that Yosef could interpret it. Yosef did not feel on the level of Chizkiyahu to do nothing, but he also did not want to engage in full hishtadlut. Therefore, he did not plead with the Sar HaMashkim. Instead, he minimally said כי אם זְכַרְתַּנִי — "If you happen to remember this episode, then mention me to Par'oh." He remained calm, composed, and made the smallest gesture that showed he believed his role was merely to begin the process — and Hashem would handle the rest. The Maharil Diskin says: Had Yosef done too much hishtadlut — pushing, begging, strategizing — he might have been released immediately. And perhaps he would have returned to his family. But then Ya'akov and the Shevatim would have had to come to Mitzrayim in chains. Because Yosef made the correct hishtadlut, Hashem allowed him to remain the extra two years — until Par'oh would have the dream that would elevate Yosef to become the viceroy of Egypt. Thus, the Midrash fully praises Yosef for the quality of his hishtadlut. The lesson for us is clear. We must be careful never to overdo our hishtadlut in ways that make us believe we control outcomes. If someone pleads for help in a desperate, panicked tone, he is showing that he thinks the results depend on him. If someone constantly emails a buyer until he gets a response, he thinks it is his pressure that will determine the sale. He may indeed get the response — but had he simply begun the process in the right way, he would have gotten the same outcome without the excess hishtadlut that is against Hashem's will. May Hashem help us realize always that He is the One who accomplishes everything, enabling us to make only the hishtadlut that He desires from us. Shabbat Shalom.
In Parashat Vayera, the angels told Lot, מַשְׁחִיתִים אֲנַחְנוּ אֶת הַמָּקוֹם הַזֶּה — "We are going to destroy this city." And then in the very same pasuk they said, וַיְשַׁלְּחֵנוּ ה' לְשַׁחֲתָהּ — "Hashem sent us to destroy it." At first glance it sounds repetitive. Rabbeinu Bachya explains that the angels initially made a serious mistake. They were supposed to say that Hashem was destroying the city, but instead they said they were going to do it. They were taking credit for something that was not theirs. Immediately afterward, they corrected themselves and said that Hashem was doing it, not them. Rabbeinu Bachya adds that these angels were punished for this error. They did not receive another assignment from Hashem for 138 years, until they descended on the ladder in Yaakov's dream to escort him. Rabbeinu Bachya concludes: from here we see how severe it is for a person to take the honor that rightfully belongs to Hashem and use it for himself. The world was created to bring glory to Hashem, and it is incumbent upon us to do whatever we can to increase His honor. Whenever we accomplish something and later tell people about it, that moment becomes a tremendous opportunity to bring kavod to Hashem. We can tell them the truth — that it was Hashem who accomplished it. But if instead we say that we did it, not only are we saying something false, we are stealing Hashem's honor and using it for ourselves. How many times do people make this mistake without even realizing it? When someone says, "I negotiated a great deal," he is stealing Hashem's honor. When someone says, "My dieting and discipline improved my health," he is stealing Hashem's honor. When someone says, "I recovered because of the treatment that I chose," he is stealing Hashem's honor. When someone says, "The project succeeded because of my strategies," he is stealing Hashem's honor. Even with Torah knowledge, we are not allowed to attribute success to ourselves. When Moshe Rabbeinu told the people about the new judicial system, he said that the difficult cases could be brought to him and he would give the rulings. Because he said that, and implied that the answers came from him, Hashem took away his knowledge when he was asked the question of the daughters of Tzelofhad regarding their father's inheritance. Moshe was meant to say, "Bring me the difficult cases and Hashem will answer them." This is something we must keep in mind always. Our purpose in this world is to bring glory to our King. Every time it appears that we accomplished something and then speak about it afterward, we are standing at a crossroads. We can give credit where credit is truly due and elevate Hashem's name in people's eyes, or we can elevate our own name and diminish His glory. In this week's Parashat Miketz, Pharaoh was disturbed by his dreams, and none of his advisors were able to help him. Finally, the Sar HaMashkim remembered Yosef and told Pharaoh about him. Suddenly, Yosef was rushed out of prison and found himself standing before the king of the most powerful nation in the world. This was his chance to impress the king, his chance for honor and glory, and his opportunity to finally escape prison. Pharaoh said to him, "I heard that you know how to interpret dreams." Yosef, at that very moment, seized the golden opportunity to bring glory to Hashem instead of himself. He replied, בִּלְעָדָי, אֱלֹהִים יַעֲנֶה אֶת שְׁלוֹם פַּרְעֹה — "It is not from me; Hashem will answer the welfare of Pharaoh." "It is not I. Hashem interprets dreams." With complete heroism, Yosef refused to take any credit for himself and gave it all to Hashem. And in the end, Hashem rewarded him with an honor greater than anything he could have imagined, elevating him to become the viceroy of Egypt. Our mission in this world is to bring glory and honor to our King. And we are given opportunities to do so all day long.
The letter urges dismissing fears of sorcery, strengthening bitachon in Divine providence, and focusing on practical avodah: checking tefillin and mezuzos, daily tzedakah, Tehillim, Torah memorization, proper self-discipline, chinuch of Jewish children, and meaningful participation in Chassidic farbrengens that lead to real change. https://www.torahrecordings.com/rebbe/igroskodesh/016/003/5942
Every Moment is a Gift
Every Moment is a Gift
When the Chashmonaim entered the Beit HaMikdash, they had every reason to despair. It was in shambles, and it seemed like all of the oil had already been defiled. And then, one moment of extra effort changed history. They discovered one jug of pure oil. That single moment of discovery brought about eight days of light, which in turn produced thousands of years of spiritual illumination for Am Yisrael. Furthermore, they knew they had only enough oil for one day. They could have easily said, what is the point? Anyway, they were going to be without oil for another seven days until they produced more pure oil. However, they understood the value of every effort when it comes to mitzvot. We never say, why bother? Every bit of effort is precious to Hashem. When a person acts l'shem shamayim, Hashem generally blesses his efforts, allowing them to reach far beyond anything he could have imagined. A man whom we will call Joe told me that six years ago, when he was about sixty, his job forced him to relocate to a new city. He had lived his entire life completely devoid of Torah and mitzvot. But with hashgachah pratit, the new city he moved to had a large population of religious Jews. One morning, everything seemed to be going wrong, and he felt he needed to clear his head, so he went out for a bike ride. After riding four miles, a large, magnificent building caught his eye — a recently built shul. He felt it might make him feel better to go inside, so he walked in and decided to sit for a while. When he entered, he saw a minyan in progress and sat quietly in the back, wearing shorts and a T-shirt, simply observing the tefillah. His attire and the fact that he was an out-of-towner drew some attention, but most people continued naturally with their tefillah. Afterward, one man approached him with a warm smile and said hello. He then asked Joe if he would like to put on tefillin. At first, Joe resisted, but then he accepted. It was the first time he had put on tefillin since his bar mitzvah nearly fifty years earlier. He described feeling something incredibly powerful — indescribable — and he began to cry. The man then asked him if he would return the next day to put on tefillin again, and Joe agreed. Without telling him, the man went and purchased a pair of tefillin for Joe. Joe came back the next day, put them on, and once again felt uplifted. The man then introduced him to a website, itorah.com , where thousands of shiurim are available for people on all levels. Joe thanked him and said he would listen. A few weeks later, that same man saw Joe riding his bicycle, this time wearing a kippah and listening to a Torah class. It was an astonishing sight — someone who had never lived a religious life was now proudly wearing a kippah in public. Since then, Joe has learned and completed five masechtot of Gemara, and today he learns every morning for about three hours in a local yeshivah. His wife also became religious, and he says he has never been happier. He now recognizes how much his neshamah was starving for Torah and mitzvot. He sees clearly how the hashgachah of Hashem guided every step: the forced relocation to a religious city, the difficult morning that led him to ride his bike, the inexplicable pull to enter a shul despite his attire, and finally, the one individual who made a small extra effort to say hello and invite him to put on tefillin. He often wonders how different his life would have been without that moment. A little extra effort goes a very long way, especially when we are acting l'shem shamayim.
In this special Chanukah edition we delve into antisemitism of today, the tragedy that befell our people in Australia and our ultimate hope and how seeing love in each other and increasing Bitachon in Hashem is connected to what we think about when we look at the Chanukah Lights this year. I introduce and gift a special little sefer to the women shiur as we delve into the Bitachon it offers us.
The Rebbe stresses that insufficient bitachon in Hashem harms health and home. He urges trust in Divine guidance, avoiding fault-finding, and strengthening shalom bayis, which serves as the vessel for blessing, health, parnassah, and nachas from children. https://www.torahrecordings.com/rebbe/005_igros_kodesh/003_kislev/1276
The Rebbe responds to anxious thoughts, stressing that worry itself undermines bitachon. He urges channeling emotional energy into purposeful avodah, especially chinuch, noting the urgency of the times and the responsibility to use inherited strengths with joy and trust in Hashem. https://www.torahrecordings.com/rebbe/005_igros_kodesh/003_kislev/1284
The Rebbe offers guidance for restoring shalom bayis through practical steps—checking mezuzos, giving tzedakah before candle lighting, and thoughtful compromise. He stresses public Torah learning and a chassidic farbrengen as vessels for blessing and harmony. https://www.torahrecordings.com/rebbe/005_igros_kodesh/003_kislev/1294
As we mourn the tragic loss of sixteen pure neshamot who were killed in Sydney, Australia, we are reminded once again that in every generation they rise up against us. We are reminded that we are still in galut, yearning for the coming of the Mashiach, when we will no longer experience terror or sadness. Those who were murdered al kidush Hashem are now in the highest realms of Gan Eden, basking in the radiance of the Shechinah. Their friends and families, however, are left reeling from the tragedy, struggling to understand how their loved ones could be taken in such a horrific way. As we begin the holiday of Chanukah, we must internalize that although it is impossible for us to comprehend the ways of Hashem in this world, we know this is yet another part of His master plan. Hashem is the One who takes lives, and He is the One who will restore them. He has always protected us throughout the generations, though at times we needed to experience forms of affliction beforehand. He is the One who obliterated the Egyptians after they enslaved us for centuries. He saved us from Amalek when we were caught off guard. He saved us from Balak and Bil'am whcen we did not even know how much danger we were in. He saved us from Sanheriv's army, killing 185,000 soldiers in a single night without us lifting a finger. He saved us from the hands of Haman and Ahashverosh. The mighty Greeks issued decrees to tear us away from our Torah. They, like all the other nations, were jealous of our connection to Hashem and sought to destroy it. And once again, Hashem sent heavenly assistance to His people to defeat the strongest empire in the world. The celebration of Chanukah was not that we were physically saved. The celebration was that the light of our Torah and mitzvot was going to continue shining brightly. To make it clear that it is our Torah and mitzvot that are the most precious things we have in this world, Hashem made an additional miracle and kept the flames of the menorah burning for eight days and nights. Our nation is eternal. Our adherence to Torah and mitzvot are the keys to our success. Our response to tragedy must be to redouble our efforts in the performance of mitzvot. A small amount of light can push away a large amount of darkness. Right now, a thick cloud of darkness hovers over us. We ache for our brothers and sisters who are deeply affected by this devastating event. A time of joy has turned into one of grief. We must empathize with those in pain, pray for the injured, and beseech Hashem to console the mourners. We must also use this moment as a personal calling to come closer to Hashem. It will be our collective efforts that bring about the greatest day in history—the day of Bila HaMavet LaNetsach, Umachah Hashem Dima Me'al Kol Panim. The day when there will be no more death, and Hashem Himself will wipe away the tears of all who have suffered. For now, we are still in the dark. But the candles we light on Chanukah will pierce that darkness. Every mitzvah we perform and every word of Torah we learn adds more light to the world. Let us linger a bit longer by the nerot Chanukah, praying for those who are suffering. Let us devote more time to our families, offering chizuk and inspiration to help them grow in the ways of Hashem. Our Torah and mitzvot are our greatest tools. May we be zocheh to witness the greatest light of all—the Or of the Mashiah. Then all the nations of the world will recognize the glory of Hashem and understand that we are His treasured children.
Part II of Yaakov's Bitachon processing
There are times when Hashem wants to bestow a blessing upon a person, but in order to do so, the person first needs to acquire extra merits. Therefore, Hashem sends him a test in the very area in which He wants to bless him. By overcoming that test, the person earns far more than anything he would gain by failing it and taking the immediate, fleeting benefit. A rabbi told me that one of his congregants recently received a paycheck that was two thousand dollars more than it was supposed to be. At first, he hoped it was a bonus or a raise, but the more he thought about it, the more he realized that if it were something extra, his boss would have told him beforehand. Then came an internal struggle: Should he mention it or quietly deposit it? After a sincere inner battle, he did the right thing and asked the woman who writes the checks about the extra amount. She told him she had made a mistake and had accidentally added the next person's pay to his check. She was so grateful that he came forward, sparing her from serious trouble. She issued a corrected check, and the man walked away having forfeited a potential extra $2,000. Just an hour later, he received a call from a wealthy man asking him to stop by his home on his way home from work. When he arrived, the man thanked him for helping his son and handed him an envelope. Inside was a check for $10,000—five times the amount he had just returned. He had helped that man's son long before, but Hashem placed it in the father's mind to contact him precisely at that moment, right after he passed his test with honesty. Rabbi Ayal Amrami from Israel told another remarkable story. A man, struggling terribly with parnassah, was supposed to receive 600,000 shekel from an inheritance after his father-in-law passed away. His brothers-in-law maneuvered him out of it, and he received nothing. Devastated and furious, he vowed never to speak to them again. Sometime later, he attended one of Rabbi Amrami's classes, where the topic was being mevater—forgiving others even when we are right—and how powerful that is in Shamayim. The man received tremendous chizuk. He decided to forgive his brothers-in-law completely and restore peace in the family. A few weeks later, he went to thank the rabbi for the chizuk and to share the incredible yeshuah that followed. He had just earned three times the inheritance he lost—1.8 million shekels. The rabbi, knowing he learned full-time, asked how he could have possibly made such a sum. The man explained that someone approached him asking to buy the rights above the roof of his apartment in Beit Shemesh. He had never even known he owned such rights. The buyer said he would make a generous, nonnegotiable offer. The man expected a few thousand shekels—until the offer came: 1.8 million shekels. Overcoming nisyanot brings endless reward in the next world, but very often Hashem gifts people with blessings even in this world—using their heroic efforts as the very channel through which those blessings flow.
As we know, shidduchim are from Hashem. Even what appear to be mistakes are all part of the Master Plan. Someone told me that their friend, who is six foot two, became engaged to a girl who is four feet eleven. When the question of her height came up, the initial response was, "almost five feet." Somehow, on the other side, this was heard as five foot three. And based on that, they said yes. Clearly, this was Hashem setting things up so that the meeting would take place and the proper match could come to be. It reminds us that even when details seem unclear or inaccurate, Hashem is orchestrating the outcome. It is important to remember that even when things don't work out, even when the process feels slow, confusing, or painful, it is also from Hashem—and it is for our benefit. A man told me that just before Shavuot, a boy was suggested for his daughter. However, she was scheduled to be out of town until after Shavuot. Then the boy went away. After that, she was leaving for Eretz Yisrael for the summer. The other side initially sounded willing to wait. But when the girl returned in September, they discovered that the boy had already begun dating someone else. A few weeks later, they found out that he was getting engaged to a family friend. The girl's mother was crushed. She felt sure that this boy was perfect for her daughter, and it didn't seem that there were any other options. The father asked their rav to speak to his wife and give her chizuk. The rav told her that in Shamayim, not only is each person's match decided, but there are also several suggestions that a person must hear along the way. Before meeting the right one, a person often has to pass by others who are not meant to be. This process itself brings a person closer to their true zivug. The woman felt comforted and they moved forward. Baruch Hashem, a few months later, another boy was suggested, and this time the shidduch moved quickly to an engagement. The mother later said, "Now that I see the boy she actually got engaged to compared to the previous one, it's so clear that this match is far more compatible for her." We don't know what's truly good for us. Only Hashem does. And therefore, the only logical response is to accept His decisions with trust and happiness. Rabbi Reuven Elbaz shared a powerful story about a young man who had been offered an outstanding shidduch. The girl had wonderful qualities and came from an aristocratic family. After three meetings, however, the girl ended it. The young man was deeply hurt, and because his middot were not refined, he decided to take revenge. He approached a friend he didn't like and suggested this girl to him. The friend took it seriously, looked into her, and reported back that he was interested. The young man then told him that he arranged a meeting for the next night at seven o'clock and gave him the girl's address—without ever asking the girl or her family. The next night, the friend knocked on the door asking for the girl, and the father had no idea what he was talking about. The young man was mortified. The father, realizing something wasn't right, asked who had sent him. When the boy mentioned the young man's name, the father understood immediately what had happened. Rather than sending him away, the father invited the boy to sit for a few minutes to ease his embarrassment. In the course of that short conversation, the father was extremely impressed with him. After looking into him properly, he decided that this young man was suitable for his daughter. Baruch Hashem, they eventually got married. There are no mistakes. Everything is biyad Hashem. And everything He does is for our very best.
The greatest segulot are found in the 613 mitzvot that Hashem gave us. Of course, the true reward for mitzvot is paid in the next world, but they also come with side benefits in this world as well. One man told me that from the time he started saying Birkat HaMazon properly, with understanding and focus, he was able to break through with four new customers in his business. Another man told me that he suddenly received two unexpected payments totaling $25,000. Another man shared something even more striking. He had a fever for nine straight days—the longest he had ever been sick in his life. Just a few days after the fever finally broke, he became ill again, this time with another high fever. He went to the doctor, who ran a series of blood tests. The results were very troubling. His numbers were completely out of range, and his white blood cell count was extremely high, indicating a serious infection. The doctor told him further testing would be needed and that he would have to return for a chest X-ray, as pneumonia was a real concern. Meanwhile, over the previous six weeks, many unusual things had been happening to this man's children. He felt that something wasn't right and decided it was time to have his mezuzot checked. The very same day the doctor gave him the alarming news about his blood work, a sofer arrived at his home to check his mezuzot. After examining them, the sofer told him that thirteen mezuzot were invalid. The man was stunned. He begged the sofer to replace them immediately. The sofer said he would return the next day with new mezuzot. The following day, the man went to the imaging center for his chest X-ray, only to be told that he couldn't have it done without a prescription. Since his doctor's office was located in the same building, he went upstairs to get one. The doctor looked at him and said that he appeared a bit better than before and asked if he could recheck his bloodwork. Just minutes before entering the doctor's office, the sofer had called to inform him that all thirteen mezuzot had been replaced with beautiful, high-quality, kosher mezuzot. When the new blood test results came back, the doctor was astonished. Every number had returned to normal. He told the man, "Everything looks completely fine. I've never seen anything like this in my life." The very next day, the man felt one hundred percent better and resumed his normal routine. Hashem gives us mitzvot for our benefit. He doesn't need anything from us. He only wants to give to us. And the way He gives us is through the performance of mitzvot—but they must be done properly. Birkat HaMazon has extraordinary segulot, but it needs to be said with true appreciation and understanding of the words. Mezuzot protect us, but only when they are written and affixed according to halachah. It was a tremendous act of kindness from Hashem to alert this man that his mezuzot were invalid. Because the primary reason we keep mitzvot is not for the segulot. It is because they are the will of Hashem and a fulfillment of His Torah. When mitzvot are deficient, a person is missing part of his tikkun in this world. Our mission in life is to become complete in the fulfillment of mitzvot. In Hashem's great love for us, along the way, He gives us encouragement, bonuses, and gentle reminders—so that we can succeed in the purpose for which we were created.
#Israel Trip 2025(b) 06:34 Recollections of Rav Jay Marcus 07:53 Challenges of the present and past 12:19 How much of our Emunah is because of parents and how much is because of our own discoveries 21:11 Fundamentals of Emunah 26:21 Depths of belief 32:18 Uncertainty in Emunah 34:03 Bitachon and Hishtadlus 39:50 Science and Torah 47:43 Practical advise to strengthen Emunah 50:44 The future of Jewry in the diaspora 55:20 Values of the general society 59:17 When parents have different values 1:01:58 Challenges and Opportunities of the modern world
In the beginning of this week's Parashat Vayishlach, Ya'akov Avinu is preparing to confront Esav, who wanted to kill him. Rashi tells us that Ya'akov prepared himself in three ways: sending gifts, praying, and strategizing for a potential battle. Why did Rashi list them in this order—placing tefillah second, between sending gifts and preparing for war? The Be'era Parashah explains that Rashi is teaching a fundamental principle about tefillah. Hashem built into the nature of the world that prayer works. And just as giving gifts and preparing for war are normal hishtadlut that people do, so too tefillah operates within the natural order. It is not considered miraculous to have prayers answered. For this reason, the Maharsha writes that although the Gemara teaches that a miracle performed for a person can deduct from his merits, anything attained through tefillah—even the greatest salvations—does not take away any merits, because tefillah is never considered a miracle. This understanding should give us tremendous chizuk. The answering of tefillah is part of how the world was created to function. Tefillot are so powerful that they can change decrees no matter how impossible the odds may appear. Chazal tell us that in Shamayim it had been decreed that Esav would marry Le'ah and Ya'akov would marry Rachel—"the older for the older, and the younger for the younger." The Alshich adds that Le'ah had four overwhelming hurdles preventing her from marrying Ya'akov. First, the heavenly decree had designated her for Esav. Second, the Pasuk testifies to Rachel's beauty. Third, the Pasuk tells us that Ya'akov loved Rachel. And fourth, Ya'akov worked for seven years for Rachel and took great precautions not to be deceived by Lavan. Yet Le'ah prayed so intensely, so persistently, with so many tears that her eyes became tender. And through those tefillot, she overturned the decree and all the natural odds. Chazal say that the greatness of tefillah is such that not only did Le'ah avoid marrying Esav, she even preceded Rachel to marry Ya'akov. And because of those same tefillot, she gave birth to six of the twelve Shevatim—the Bechor, the Kehunah, the Levi'im, the Meluchah, and the lineage of Mashiah—all emerging from her prayers. The Pasuk in Parashat Vayera says that the angels were sent to destroy Sedom while Avraham was still standing before Hashem. The next Pasuk tells us that Avraham prayed for Sedom to be spared. The Seforno explains: even though the decree had already been issued and the angels had already arrived in Sedom, Avraham still prayed, because he understood the ways of Hashem. As Chazal tell us Even if a sharp sword is already touching a person's neck, he should still pray, because tefillah can work no matter how desperate the situation seems. This past year, a woman received the difficult news that she had a tumor, lo 'alenu. At that time, she strengthened herself in guarding her speech and devoted herself to encouraging others to do the same. She was told that she would need the strongest form of chemotherapy. The doctors warned her of every side effect—especially that it was absolutely guaranteed she would lose all her hair. She asked them if there was anything at all she could do to avoid this. Their answer was clear: with the dosage she required, there was a one-hundred-percent certainty she would lose every strand. But she strengthened herself with the knowledge that with Hashem, nothing is fixed. She poured her heart into tefillah—not only for a full recovery, but also that she should not lose any of her hair. Today, Baruch Hashem the tumor has been completely removed. And amazingly, she did not lose even one strand of hair throughout the entire process. The doctors had no explanation. But the explanation is clear. She prayed to the Creator of the world—the One Who decides whether hair falls out or remains. Tefillah is wondrous, and Hashem created it to work as part of the natural order of the world. The more a person recognizes Hashem's power and involvement in every aspect of his life, the deeper, stronger, and more effective his tefillah becomes. Shabbat shalom.
By definition, Bitachon is the reliance on Hashem, so how is it possible to be truly "grounded" while also have complete and total bitachon in Hashem?
It is not uncommon for a person to feel down about himself when he looks around and notices other people's strengths and talents. He sees that his friends give more charity than he does. He sees that they pray with more concentration. They understand the learning more quickly, and everything seems to come easier for them. And he begins to wonder, "What is my life worth? I have nothing that I excel in." A young man once wrote a painful letter to Rav Shlomo Wolbe about his struggle in yeshivah. He felt everyone else understood the Gemara and shiurim right away, while he worked so hard just to grasp the basics. Others remembered what they learned, while he forgot. He felt he was accomplishing nothing, and it was breaking him. Rav Wolbe wrote back that he was suffering from a bad case of jealousy and explained- Seeing other people's strengths can make a person feel like he has nothing. But if he would only realize what priceless gifts Hashem has given him, his whole outlook would change. A person must know that when it comes to our avodat Hashem, if we use the strengths and weaknesses we were given to serve Hashem, we can reach the highest levels of kedushah. A person's strengths were not given randomly. And his weaknesses were not an accident. They are the exact tools he is meant to have to serve Hashem with. If a person truly knew that Hashem gave him a very specific job and that this is all Hashem wants from him, he would never care what anyone else has. He has a mission that nobody else could ever fulfill. No one else could do his job in this world. We are never measured against what other people do. In fact, if a person was blessed with outstanding talents, that only means he carries greater responsibility. And if he does not use those gifts properly, he will be held more accountable for them. Sometimes the very people we envy are the ones who will face harsher judgment if they fail to live up to their potential. A person should be happy learning the way he knows best. He should be happy praying the way he can. He should be happy giving the amount of tzedakah he is capable of giving. If he fulfills his maximum potential with his own tools, he can reach the same greatness as the greatest people of his generation. But if someone constantly thinks, "Why can't I understand like him?" or "Why can't I remember like him?" he can destroy his entire mission in this world. Shelomo Hamelech taught us that jealousy causes rotting of the bones. It decays a person from the inside. It takes all the beautiful gifts Hashem gave him and makes them rot, because he feels worthless compared to others and stops using them. Instead of building, jealousy paralyzes. Instead of growing, it shrivels. We are in this world for one reason: to serve Hashem. Everything else is secondary. Hashem did not ask us to be someone else. He only asked us to be who He created us to be. And what He gave us is exactly what we need to succeed. If we had what others had, we would be wasting our life. This applies to middot as well. If a person is naturally anxious, it is because that is the area he must refine. If someone is short-tempered, it is because that is the battlefield Hashem gave his neshamah. If someone struggles with motivation or patience or trust, that is not a flaw in the system — it is the system. Hashem is the only One who knows our mission. And He built each of us perfectly to accomplish it. There never was and never will be another person with your exact combination of talents, fears, urges, childhood experiences, temperament, and circumstances. Every detail was planned by our loving Creator who wants us to succeed in the mission that we were sent here to fulfill. Instead of focusing on what everyone else has, we should be thanking Hashem for who we are-because that is the only way we can be successful in this world
Sometimes we hear stories of shidduchim that sound unbelievable — a match suggested by mistake, a name mentioned in passing, a resume being sent after being told "no" again and again, two people from completely different worlds coming together in ways no one could have ever predicted. These stories remind us that Hashem is actively involved in every shidduch that takes place. Not only are the meetings from Hashem — even the responses are from Hashem. Who says yes and who says no. Who returns a call and who doesn't. Who suddenly becomes interested and who loses interest. Who delays and who decides quickly. It is all guided by Hashem. If a shidduch fails, it is not because of something that was said or done. It is because it was not meant to be. And if a shidduch is meant to be, Hashem has millions of ways of making it happen. We never have to worry about how we will meet the one Hashem intended for us. He already arranged it. Rabbi Reuven Elbaz told of a baal teshuvah who joined his yeshivah. The man was already older and still had not married. The rabbi gently encouraged him to begin dating, and after much hesitation, he finally agreed. Some time later, a match was proposed and a meeting was arranged at a hotel. The young man arrived on time — but the girl never showed. He waited. And waited. While sitting in the lobby, he noticed another young woman who also seemed to be waiting for someone. Curious, he gently asked her who she was waiting for. She replied that she was supposed to meet a man, but he apparently had not shown up. The man then told her what had happened to him and asked if perhaps they would agree to meet and see if there might be compatibility between them. She hesitated — but then agreed. That "chance" meeting turned out to be the right one. After making all the proper inquiries, they discovered they were perfect for each other. Baruch Hashem, he eventually became a serious talmid chacham, and to this day he thanks Hashem for sending him the best wife possible in the most unexpected way. Rabbi Shlomo Zalman Friedman, author of the popular Gilyon Noam Siach , related another remarkable story. Last summer, he attended the engagement party of one of the members of his kehillah. When he arrived, the father of the chatan hurried over and said, "Rabbi, I want to tell you how this shidduch happened." A few weeks earlier, the man had attended the engagement party of the rabbi's daughter. When he arrived at the hall, there was a line of people waiting to give their wishes. When it was his turn, the rabbi warmly greeted him and then, unexpectedly, said, "Please sit for a little while — over there, near my sons and sons-in-law." The man was puzzled. No one else had been asked to sit. He had never planned on sitting. But because the rabbi asked, he went and sat. Just before that evening, a shidduch had been suggested for his son Pinchas, but this father had not felt drawn to it. Now, while sitting among the rabbi's family, he began speaking with one of the rabbi's sons-in-law. When the son-in-law mentioned where he lived, the father realized he lived in the same neighborhood as the girl's family. So he asked him about them. The son-in-law spoke glowingly about the family. By the end of that one conversation, the father's heart had changed. And now — Baruch Hashem — they were celebrating the engagement. Hashem knows how to place people in the right location, at the right time, with the right words and the right mood — in ways none of us could ever design. A person should never fall into despair wondering, "Maybe I ruined it. Maybe I said something wrong." If a shidduch is meant to be, nothing in the world can stop it. And if it is not meant to be, then it was never truly yours — no matter how promising it looked. When the Steipler Rebbe went to meet the sister of the Chazon Ish, he knew the trip involved a four-hour train ride. Planning to sleep during the ride, he learned intensely for nearly two days straight without rest. But upon boarding, he worried that the seats might contain sha'atnez — so he stood the entire trip. By the time he arrived, he was utterly exhausted. During the meeting, he fell asleep multiple times. He also had a hearing problem and struggled to hear much of what was said. And still — she said yes. Because when Hashem wants the shidduch, nothing can stop it. Hashem is the Master Shadchan. He brings people together in ways that defy logic, timelines, and expectations. And when we truly absorb this, shidduchim become less frightening, less pressured — and far more peaceful. We learn to trust. We learn to wait. We learn that when it is time — it will happen.
Sometimes there is strife in the home due to a difficult relationship between a father-in-law and a son-in-law. When a son-in-law feels he is being treated unfairly, controlled, or that no matter what he does it is never enough, it can cause great damage to the home and deeply disturb a person's inner peace. We must internalize a fundamental truth: Hashem places every person into our lives. It is not by chance and it is not by mistake. Every relationship is carefully planned by the Master Orchestrator to help each person fulfill his mission in this world. The Torah tells us about one of the most difficult fathers-in-law in all of history. People sometimes complain, "It's not fair, my father-in-law doesn't give me money." Yaakov Avinu's father-in-law not only didn't give him money — he stole from him on a daily basis. The Midrash tells us that Lavan justified his thievery by claiming that Yaakov still owed him fourteen more years of work for Bilhah and Zilpah. He was manipulative and dishonest, changing Yaakov's wages again and again. Chazal tell us it was done a hundred times. He took advantage of Yaakov's devotion and honesty. Yaakov worked seven long years to marry Rachel, and Lavan had no problem switching her for Leah. He felt no guilt whatsoever. Even worse, afterward he justified himself, making it seem as though Yaakov was the one who acted improperly by marrying the younger sister before the older one. Yaakov was forced to endure deception, manipulation, and emotional torture from his father-in-law for twenty years. Yet the Torah testifies about him that his integrity remained perfect. Yaakov understood that this suffering was not random. He knew this was part of his avodat Hashem and an essential piece of his mission in life. For twenty years he lived in Lavan's home, yet remained attached to Hashem with unwavering emunah. Every test, every humiliation, every disappointment, he accepted with one thought in mind: this is me'et Hashem. Of course, Yaakov did his hishtadlut. He took reasonable steps to protect himself. He confronted Lavan respectfully. He negotiated. He acted wisely. But once something happened, he always returned it to Hashem and reminded himself that nothing occurs outside of His will. It is not forbidden to question a person who harms you, but it must be done with dignity, not with rage and not with cruelty. A Jew is not judged only by what he endures, but by how he endures it. The Torah is teaching us something fundamental. When Hashem places difficult people into our lives, it is not to break us, but to build us. Not to humiliate us, but to refine us. Not to weaken us, but to strengthen us. A difficult father-in-law can feel suffocating. He may be critical, controlling, dismissive, or impossible to satisfy. Nothing seems good enough. You may feel constantly judged, unheard, and trapped in a role you never volunteered for. And it hurts precisely because it comes from a place that was meant to be safe. This is where emunah must rise to the surface. Hashem sees every tear. He hears every painful word. He counts every insult that was swallowed in silence. And when a person restrains himself for the sake of shalom in his home, that sacrifice shines brightly in shamayim. Yaakov did not leave Lavan's house defeated. He emerged spiritually powerful. Though Lavan tried to harm him emotionally and physically, Yaakov walked away with a beautiful family, great wealth, and an inner greatness that shaped the future of Klal Yisrael. It is not that Lavan became a better person. It is that Yaakov became a greater one. So many people beg Hashem to change others. But sometimes Hashem is working on changing us instead. And that is far more powerful. The more a person works on his middot and his emunah, the more blessing Hashem pours into his life in ways he could never imagine.
Finding Real Peace
If Hardship Refines Us &Expands Our Vessels Why Should We Have Bitachon &Pray for Relief?
When Rivka told Yaakov to go to the house of Lavan and find a wife, she said, " וְיָשַׁבְתָּ עִמּוֹ יָמִים אֲחָדִים ," that he should stay there for yamim achadim, which is generally translated as "a short time," until his brother's anger would subside, and then she would call for him to come back. When Yaakov later told Lavan that he would work for seven years to marry Rachel, Rashi says that these are the yamim achadim that Rivka was referring to. The question is, why would Rivka want Yaakov to be in such a bad spiritual environment with Lavan for such a long time? Furthermore, when Yaakov was working during those seven years, the Torah says they felt like yamim achadim, a short time, because of his love for her. Seemingly, if someone is so eager to get married, every day should feel like an eternity, not yamim achadim. Rabbi Menashe Reisman brought a beautiful explanation in the name of Rabbi Michal Forshlager to answer these questions. Rivka wanted to give Yaakov the greatest tool that would ensure that he would always be happy in any circumstance that he might find himself in. When a person is suffering from a problem in life, it is usually because the problem has lasted for a long time. Problems that only last a short amount of time are much easier to deal with. If someone is older and not married and speaks about his difficulty, he will usually say, "I have been trying for so many years and nothing works out." But if a person would live one day at a time, his quality of life would improve tremendously. Every day is a new day, with endless possibilities of what could happen. If a person wakes up in the morning believing that today could easily be the day of his salvation, it gives him strength and courage. What was yesterday has nothing to do with today. The difficulty begins when a person connects today with all the past days and looks at everything as one long, unbearable stretch. The same is true with worry. Most worry is about the future, not the present. Right now, a person is still alive, still taken care of, and still standing. His suffering comes from thinking about what might be tomorrow. If he would only focus on today, on what he already has and on what might happen to bring salvation, he would be far happier. This is what Rivka was telling Yaakov about the house of Lavan. He should be there for yamim achadim, literally, one day at a time. She knew it would be hard for him, and she gave him the secret of how to survive it. Even when Yaakov agreed to work for seven years, that did not mean he accepted that it must be seven full years. It meant seven years worth of work. If Yaakov would somehow get money, he could pay Lavan and leave immediately. Just as an eved ivri who is supposed to work six years can be freed early if his master releases him, so too Yaakov could get out at any time if Hashem willed it. A person can also pray that Hashem put it into someone's heart to help him, or that he find a way out sooner than expected. When a person knows that he can be helped today, it gives him great strength. If someone is told he must undergo treatment for a certain amount of time or remain in the hospital for a certain amount of time, he can ease so much of his pain by remembering that with Hashem, nothing has to be the way people say. The first treatment can go so well that no further treatment is needed. What was supposed to be two weeks can become two days. Even though Yosef was in prison for twelve years, he remained in good spirits, knowing that any day he could be released. And although Yaakov seemed to have such a difficult time in Lavan's house, being cheated and taken advantage of again and again, the Torah testifies - וַיָּבוֹא יַעֲקֹב שָׁלֵם -that he left whole, in every way, physically, financially, and spiritually. Lavan was never able to truly harm him. Everything happened exactly as Hashem wanted, and it was all for Yaakov's benefit. A person's bitachon gives him strength every single day of his life. And when it says that the seven years Yaakov worked for Rachel were yamim achadim because of his love for her, Rav Michal explained that it means that even though Yaakov loved Rachel deeply and wanted to marry her, because he looked at each day by itself and thought, "Maybe today will be the day," the time passed quickly. In the same way, Yaakov was able to survive his long stay with Lavan because Rivka told him she would send for him when it was time to come home. Each day, Yaakov could tell himself, "Maybe today is my last day here." Yeshuat Hashem is keheref ayin. A person can be saved today. If a person learns to live today properly, with real bitachon, he will always have the strength and courage to be happy and productive in life.
Shiur given by Rabbi Benzion Brodie on Bais Medrash Vaad. Shiur recorded in Yeshivas Ohr Reuven, Monsey, NY.
In the beginning of this week's parashah, Vayetzei, Yaakov dreamed of angels going up and down a ladder. The Ramban explains that Hashem was teaching Yaakov about His absolute involvement in everything that takes place in this world. Even when Hashem sends His messengers, the angels, to act in this world, they first go up to Him after seeing their mission and ask exactly what He wants done. Only afterward do they come back down and carry out His will. Nothing happens on its own. Even what people do to us is never truly in their hands. It is only what Hashem wants that can come to pass. A man complained to me that someone had stolen his customer in business, and he could not stop thinking about it. I told him that no human being has the power to take away a customer from another person. If it happened, it was only because Hashem willed it. Even though people have free will, they cannot use that free will to harm another person unless it is decreed by Hashem. When Lavan chased Yaakov and caught up with him, he said, "I have the power to harm you, but the G-d of your father came to me last night and warned me not to touch you." His words contradict themselves. On the one hand, he claims he has the power to harm Yaakov. In the same breath, he admits that Hashem is the One who controls what he can and cannot do. The Be'er HaParashah brings an explanation from Rav Shalom Schwadron on this pasuk, based on a story told by the Alter of Novardok about his own youth. As a young boy, he was learning in an out-of-town yeshivah when his parents sent word that he must come home urgently. He did not have enough money to buy a train ticket. Still, he believed with complete bitachon that Hashem would help him. He traveled for several days until he reached the train station. There, he sat down on a bench, opened his Gemara, and waited for Hashem's salvation. There were still a few hours before the train was scheduled to depart. At one point, a religious Jew arrived and saw the boy sitting and learning. He was thrilled to find another Jew immersed in Torah. He struck up a conversation and invited the boy to sit next to him on the train so they could learn together during the journey. The boy replied that he would love to, but he did not have a ticket. The man told him he had better buy one quickly, because the train would be leaving in a short time. The boy calmly explained that he had no money, but he had complete trust that Hashem would help him. The man was stunned. "You traveled all this way without money for a ticket?" he said. "That's not bitachon, that's foolishness. You can't buy a ticket with faith. You need money." With that, the man shook his head and boarded the train. Time passed. The train was now only minutes from departure. A final boarding call was announced. The boy continued sitting and learning, calm and unshaken. Then, just moments before the train was about to leave, another Jew came running into the station, out of breath and afraid he had missed it. He noticed the yeshivah boy still sitting on the bench and asked him why he was not boarding. When he heard that the boy had no money for a ticket, the man immediately said, "If you need a ticket, I'll gladly buy you one." He rushed to the counter, purchased the ticket, and handed it to the boy. Together, they boarded the train just as the doors closed. The boy thanked the kind Jew for the ticket, and he thanked Hashem for sending him at the final moment. As he looked for a seat, he suddenly saw that first religious man staring at him in disbelief. "How did you get a ticket?" the man asked. The boy told him what had happened and quoted the Midrash that says, "Whoever trusts in Hashem, Hashem will save him." The man shook his head. "If that fellow hadn't come at the last second, you'd still be sitting there. Don't tell me your bitachon helped you. It was that man who saved you." But the truth was the opposite. It was precisely because of the boy's bitachon that Hashem sent that man at the final moment to help him. So too with Lavan. He told Yaakov, "I could have harmed you, but there was just one small problem. At the last second, Hashem told me not to." That means he never had any control. No human being in this world has any power on his own. No one can hurt us, and no one can help us, unless Hashem decrees it. The more clearly we internalize this truth, the more peaceful and tranquil our lives will become. Shabbat Shalom
The Zohar HaKadosh writes that it is worth it for a person to seek out all of the delicacies that the world has to offer, just to be able to say Birkat Hamazon with joy, because Birkat Hamazon, when said properly, brings upon a person the greatest berachot from the Upper Worlds. The more joy and appreciation a person feels during Birkat Hamazon, the greater the blessings that are drawn down to him. The Zohar writes further that when a person says Birkat Hamazon properly, he brings joy to Heaven and to the earth. We should feel tremendous happiness that Hashem gave us the zechut to have the opportunity to say Birkat Hamazon. The Yesod VeShoresh HaAvodah would make a tefillah before Birkat Hamazon, asking Hashem to give him the zechut to say every word with kavanah. And when he succeeded in saying it with kavanah, he would recite a special tefillah afterward, thanking Hashem for granting him such a precious gift. Once, a talmid chacham came to see Rav Shach. When he entered, the Rav had just begun Birkat Hamazon. The visitor watched as Rav Shach said every word slowly from a siddur, as if he were counting precious jewels. It took about fifteen minutes to complete. When he finished, his face was glowing with joy. The talmid chacham asked why he looked so happy, and Rav Shach replied that he had just merited to say Birkat Hamazon properly, and that meant success in all areas of life and long life as well. The sefer Amud Esh relates that a woman once came to the Maharil Diskin, weeping that she had been married many years without meriting to have children. He advised her to accept upon herself to say Birkat Hamazon from a siddur, with kavanah. In time, she had a baby. When people would go to the Stipler for a berachah to have children, he would give them the same counsel, to say Birkat Hamazon from a siddur with kavanah. The Stipler would also say that Birkat Hamazon said properly is a segulah to merit children who are tzaddikim. The Midrash teaches that Hashem said, "Eat, be satisfied, and then bless My Name with Birkat Hamazon, and I will remove sickness from your midst." Rav Mendel of Rimanov found this hinted to in the pasuk that says וּבֵרַך אֶת לַחְמְךָ וְאֶת מֵימֶיךָ וַהֲסִרֹתִי מַחֲלָה מִקִּרְבֶּךָ-when we bless Hashem for our bread and our water, He will remove disease from among us. The Maor VaShemesh taught that when a Jew recites Birkat Hamazon with kavanah, the food he ate is transformed into medicine and heals him from illness. The Kotzker Rebbe said that through Birkat Hamazon, a person can become close to Hashem and acquire deeper yirat shamayim. The Zohar writes that one who recites Birkat Hamazon properly in this world will merit a special place in Gan Eden. Not only that, but the berachot themselves will accompany him and protect him on his way to that place. The Kav HaYashar writes that one who recites Birkat Hamazon with kavanah will be invited to the special seudah that Hashem will prepare for the tzaddikim in the future. The Magen Avraham writes that one who is careful with Birkat Hamazon brings the geulah closer. After the fourth berachah, we have the long series of requests in the HaRachamans. The Chafetz Chaim said that one cannot compare tefillah made before a mitzvah to tefillah made after completing a mitzvah. When a mitzvah is just performed, it becomes an eit ratzon, a special time of Heavenly favor, when prayers are accepted with far greater power. After Birkat Hamazon, the gates of Shamayim are wide open, and Chazal gave us beautiful requests to say so we should not lose that precious opportunity. The Gedolim of last generation have urged us to strengthen ourselves in this wondrous mitzvah. Doing it properly requires more time and attention, but we know that whatever we invest with Hashem returns to us many times over. The Gemara in Berachot tells us that the tzaddikim of earlier generations would spend three hours on each tefillah, which means nine hours a day in prayer. The Gemara asks how they had time to learn Torah and earn a livelihood. It answers that Hashem blessed their learning and their parnasah, enabling them to accomplish in a short time what would normally take many hours. Hashem can stretch a person's day, and He can also extend a person's years. We never lose from spending time on Birkat Hamazon. On the contrary, we gain everything from it. Let us strengthen ourselves to rejoice in the zechut of thanking and praising Hashem for His endless kindness, and to feel deep hakarat hatov as we recite the holy words of Birkat Hamazon.
Everyone wants to feel secure and protected from the troubles and difficulties of life. Everyone wants success, heavenly assistance, abundant livelihood, good health, shalom bayit , nachat from their children, and a peaceful, happy life. People search far and wide for segulot that will bring them these blessings. But if we understood how many treasures lie within our mitzvot, we would never need to look elsewhere. Take, for example, the wondrous mitzvah of Birkat HaMazon. Chazal say that if a person accustoms himself to recite Birkat HaMazon properly, all the blessings and goodness in the world will come upon him. There was a man in Yerushalayim named Rabbi Shimon, who would say Birkat HaMazon with such feeling, passion, and kavanah that on Sukkot, neighbors would come to his sukkah just to watch him say it. When people asked him how he became so enthusiastic about this mitzvah, he shared the following story: When he was eleven years old, Rav Meir Shapiro—the founder of Yeshivat Chachmei Lublin and creator of Daf Yomi—came to his school to test the boys. After being impressed with their learning, Rav Meir Shapiro told them that he wanted to give them a gift that would help them throughout their entire lives. He opened the Shulchan Aruch to Siman 185 and read the words of the Ba'er Heitev. The Ba'er Heitev asks: Why is there no "Phe Sofit" anywhere in Birkat HaMazon? He answers: because anyone who recites Birkat HaMazon with kavanah will never experience what appears to be the " af "—the anger of Hashem—and his livelihood will always be given to him with honor and abundance. He then added: those who are very careful in this mitzvah should always say Birkat HaMazon from a siddur. The young Shimon accepted upon himself that moment to recite every word of Birkat HaMazon with deep kavanah . When the other children ran out to recess after lunch, he stayed behind, saying it word by word. Eventually he became known as "the Birkat HaMazon boy." When the Holocaust broke out, he was miraculously protected. Not one day passed in which he didn't have enough food—he worked in the kitchen, where he had access to anything he needed. In those very difficult times, he maintained his love and devotion to Birkat HaMazon. Birkat HaMazon was truly his key to success in life. The Maharsha writes that when a person says Birkat HaMazon the right way, the blessings ascend to Shamayim and advocate before Hashem to send him abundance in parnassah . The Zohar HaKadosh writes that there are prosecuting angels created from a person's sins, arguing against giving him easy livelihood. But the merit of Birkat HaMazon with kavanah overpowers them and brings the person parnassah . A man struggling with livelihood once went to Rav Yosef Chaim Sonnenfeld for advice. The Rav told him to recite Birkat HaMazon from a siddur, slowly and with intention. The man said, "I've already started doing that, but I haven't seen any change." Rav Sonnenfeld replied, "Continue doing it. The blessing will come." Not long afterward, the man experienced a dramatic salvation and received abundant parnassah . The Seder HaYom writes that when a person truly takes to heart the words he is saying when reciting berachot , those words pierce through all the heavens until they reach the Kisei HaKavod . Hashem takes those sincere praises, crowns Himself with them, and derives tremendous joy from them. In return, He opens His hands and satiates the person with abundant blessings. The Aruch HaShulchan writes that the proper way to recite Birkat HaMazon is slowly, word by word, like counting the most precious jewels. Just as a person eats with enthusiasm, he should say Birkst HaMazon with equal enthusiasm and gratitude. He should recite the words out loud, with joy. A man told me that when he learned about the power of Birkat HaMazon, he deliberately decided to eat bread at lunch just so he could say it. The first day, he opened a Hebrew–English siddur and took almost twenty minutes to say Birkat HaMazon. He refused to go on to the next word until he fully understood what he was saying. He did the same the next day. One hour later, two people who owed him money for a long time both called—one after the other—to say they were finally going to pay him. Birkat HaMazon has many more incredible segulot . With Hashem's help, we will continue discussing them tomorrow.
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