Bay Seasoning

In preparation for the upcoming royal wedding, Tory and Philip snack on Walkers Shortbread cookies and drink Imperial cocktails (different the Imperial martini because these have Royal Assam tea, bourbon, maple syrup and lemon). Together, they do a post-mortem on “guncle weekend” and Philip shares some of the most traumatizing instances with his adorable nephews—peeing in a dumpster anyone? Tory provides some valuable feedback on how and when to reason with children in the testing-boundaries phase, which is NEVER! Before Tory questions her mothering skills too much, she walks us through her tips and tricks for throwing the perfect baby shower. The discussion dives into their favorite baby shower games and how best to shame those expecting moms in your life. Additional topics: Drunk painting Baby Showers Mom shame Guncle time SF Firefighters Playgrounds Disney movies Baking with kids Is spanking a real punishment? Contraception Prince of Egypt The Madonna Inn Prince Harry and Meghan Markle Cushioned toilet seats DILFs

Just when you think you know someone, Tory reveals the adversity she had to overcome as a childhood: a life devoid of Felicity and Dawson’s Creek. But alas we powered through it with Rosemary Clooney cocktails (rosemary simple syrup, vodka and pamplemousse La Croix club soda). A possible gambling addict, Philip talks about his recent Las Vegas trip and the horrible feeling of losing a bunch of money, while an un-showered Tory shares her recent potty-training woes with the twins. The episode ends with Tory giving Philip some great advice before embarks on a “guncle weekend” with his 3 and 4.5-year-old nephews. Additional topics: Felicity and Scott Speedman Squeezy Baking with kids Professional coaching Ron Popeil’s dehydrator Las Vegas Fatty tuna is Otoro sushi The Beatles Love by Cirque du Soleil West Side Story Donkey Punch Arabian-goggles Potty-training Incentives for kids Guncle weekend Flora Farms San Jose Los Cabos Tequila The Royal Wedding

In preparation for Passover, Tory and Philip make vodka grape juice and meyer lemon cocktails, because Tory thinks red grape juice is the same as Manischewitz. The meat of this episode [awful word choice I know] is about Tory’s VPT (vagina physical therapy). Thanks to this subset of the medical profession, that nobody talks about, women are able to reclaim their vaginas by increasing blood flow, stimulating nerves, reducing leakage and reconnecting with their vagina. Tory’s life post childbirth has never been the same and she wants all women out there to know there’s help out there! Our resident hypochondriac, Philip, talks about the perfect bridal shower gift (kegel ball sets), before going into details about his fear of having pinworms in his bum and potentially testicular cancer. Thankfully this is what husbands are for, checking to see if you have creatures living in your bum and to talk you off a ledge! Additional topics: Vagina wands Passover seder Finger puppets Vaginal confusion Kegels

Over a bright and refreshing morning cocktail we’re calling a Lithuanian Twisted Nipple (vodka, Icelandic rhubarb liqueur, apple juice, lemon juice, two dashes of bitters, club soda, and a Luxardo maraschino cherry), Tory and Philip get intimate with their new BFF, Hugh Groman, CEO of Hugh Groman Group, a Bay Area catering empire. With a dash of shade and pinch of sass (is there any other way?), Hugh shares his life story of growing up in California restaurant kitchens, playing a therapist in NYC, working for Tom Colicchio at Gramercy Tavern, tagging along with the national musical tour of A Chorus Line, opening his own restaurant in Brooklyn, and blah blah blah he’s now got three catering businesses in the Bay. As the trio talks Passover prep, Hugh shares some hilarious catering horror stories, and easy peasy tips and tricks for entertaining. Additional items: Cynthia Nixon running for Governor Illuminoshi Dan Brown’s “The Da Vinci Code” Camp Swig Controlling Jewish moms Kim Cattrall and Sarah Jessica Parker Popping pills with Lorna Luft Tom Colicchio and Gramercy Tavern ACME Bread Martini showers Passover seder tips and tricks Bowling with scoliosis 10 plague finger puppets Kids who drink coffee Love, Simon is amazing! Jelly Belly flops Running a restaurant Responsibly using Yelp Controlling your potluck

Who knew kosher wines could be so delicious? Our morning libations were a tour of Jeff Morgan’s amazing Covenant wines with a sneak preview and taste of his first batch of brandy—straight from the barrel! As rain taps on the roof of their 7,000 sqft warehouse, and we suffer through the occasional forklift passing by, Jeff shares the story of his journey from Afromusicology student in New York to leading the band at the Grand Casino in Monaco, France, and then back to winemaking in Long Island with Larry Perrine, to journalism with the Wine Spectator and the launch of Covenant wines with Leslie Rudd, owner of Rudd winery and Estate, Napa. Jeff breaks down the stigma of Kosher wines, explaining why “foxy” wine from concord grapes made it into the homes of generations of American Jews. Today he’s changing the hearts and minds of wine lovers, producing delicious wines that just happen to be Kosher for Passover. Additional topics: Kosher wines Dean and Deluca Cask strength Robert Parker Wine pairings David Ramey Natural wines Chocolate and wine are bullshit The Covenant Kitchen cookbook Larry Perrine and Channing Daughters Orthodox Union Shomer shabbos The big Lebowski Adult Bar-Mitzvahs

On a cold rainy morning in Piedmont, CA, Tory and Philip whip up a batch of bourbon breakfast smoothies (blend Bulleit Bourbon, espresso coffee, a Häagen-Daz almond chocolate covered vanilla ice cream bar and banana). In Tory’s “showbiz room” the two shoot darts at their diaries and we get some insight into Philip pre-Bar-Mitzvah, and Tory as a melodramatic teen. The two also ask for HELP spreading the word of their Hunger Awareness Campaign. With just a few keystrokes, you, your friends, the guy who makes your Americano with water cap, your work wife, and secret lover from down the hall; can enter to win awesome prizes (cases of wine, gift baskets, beauty products, an expensive Japanese chef's knife, deli food catering, cookbooks, etc) and educate our communities about America's growing hunger epidemic at the same time. Additional topics: Diary reading Neals Yard Remedies Living with nuns Dying single Funny things kids say Boozy smoothies Rain Bad allergies Mozart Piano lessons The Body Shop Stretch marks MAZON The hunger epidemic

Tory and Philip can’t get over how delicious Hangar 1’s new rose vodka is and enjoy it straight or mixed with club soda, a squeeze of fresh meyer lemon, and brown sugar simple syrup. This Valentine’s Day episode starts with a gift exchange and a quick celebration of Tory’s birthday, Mardi Gras, and King Cakes. Philip shares his morning experience living a scene from the movie “Three Men and A Baby,” while talking about a baby guest who sounds like a crazy goat. Tory complains about having a low passenger score on Uber before the two briefly discuss the winter olympics, Johnny Weir’s Hunger Games-fashion, Tara Tara Lipinski’s bad plastic surgery, and the amazing tushies so many male athletes are sporting. In honor of the day of love, Tory shares the details of her first date and how her West Hollywood gays saved the day, leading to a fabulous destination wedding in Scotland. Philip shares the story behind his bagel-lovers t-shirt and how each one he sells fights world hunger by raising money for MAZON.org. Additional topics: Loch Ness monster Kitty cat salt and pepper shakers Screaming goats Three men and a baby Baby goat yoga Car seats West Elm Rude NY cabbies Lyft and Uber rideshares Adam Rippon LA Dreams Mazda Miata Whipped cream bikinis Gay bear t-shirts Good bagels Neal’s Yard Remedies The Dark Crystal Vacation for the eyes “Real Simple Magazine” The Body Shop

Don't forget about the $20 credit on your Postmates alcohol or beverage deliveries with our coupon code: BSDRINKS. Over white wine, spritzers, coffee and heart-shaped Hostess Ding Dongs, the talented Kathy Fitzgerald of Broadway, tells us how she went from six years of Madame Morrible in Wicked to becoming the highly sexualized Cat Lady of Long Beach. Through some appropriate—and totally welcome—flirting, Kathy explains how she’s 37% German Jewish and has the right to rub a “Jew-stick” (mezuzah) before taking the stage if she wants. On the brink of tears, she gets emotional talking about the whirlwind of being in a hit Broadway show (The Producers with Nathan Lane) during 9/11. A rare glimpse behind the Broadway curtain and the inner workings of two character actress besties, listeners come to understand Kathy's fear of closeted ghosts and disgusting estate sales. The gab-fest ends with a quick shout out to In the Room with Steven & Dana (our east coast doppelganger podcast), Philip realizing he still knows nothing about menstruation, and Tory peeing her pants from laughing so hard. Additional topics: Allison Janney Cat boxes 9 to 5 Estate sales Napa Poopy Mel Brooks California living Cat boxes Ghosts 9/11 Gay sound Boob touching Massages Diva cups Bloody auditions Physical comedy

Over a signature cocktail we’re calling “the Hot Tickle” made up of scotch whiskey, honey, fresh Meyer lemon juice and hot water (yeah it’s essentially a hot tottie), Tory shares her take on whiskey while deflecting from the YouTube downward spiral Philip was stuck in till 3:00 AM after searching “Tory Ross.” The two give a recap of the Golden Globes and swap stories of when they each smoked pot with celebrities like Natalie Portman, Peter Sarsgaard and Sean Lennon. Philip hosts Yoko Ono at a gay club in West Hollywood, and Tory is shamed by Martha Stewart for her poor waitressing skills. We hear how Philip got caught masturbating in his college dorm room, and Tory tells us about her latest emergency room visit with the kiddos. TEASER!!!!! Next week we’ll be joined by our very first guest, Broadway legend Kathy Fitzgerald, and the crew will discuss whether or not there’s such a thing as “a gay sound?” Additional topics: Golden Globes and #TIMESUP planning logistics Fake news Survey results of what people love/hate about city living Allison Janney and the Academy Award nominations Update on #METOO Dr. Larry Nassar’s conviction Dogs that age gracefully Not remembering the names of contractors makes you racist Ear infections and tubes Kids are traumatized by Santa Claus Dosing children's’ medication The ferocity of Yoko Ono Sweaty bras Being featured in the Piedmont Post Boufs not bangs Gingham patterns Vitamin gummies The right and wrong way to walk in a city Betsy “the Devil” DeVos Hot garbage in NYC

Over a signature cocktail of Carpano Antica Vermouth (amaro), club soda and an orange peel, and in the wake of the Las Vegas shooting and Yom Kippur, Tory rolls diapers for five diaper-cakes while Philip teaches us bad words in Hebrew. The conversation shifts to international travel and how Americans are perceived overseas. Tory explains how to make the perfect googly-eye wreath for Halloween and her goal in life to be featured in the local neighborhood newspaper. Two new segments are launched: “Well That Depends” where they reminisce over things of the past: newspapers, being thin, enjoying fast food; and, “Unconditional Love on the Weekends” where they talk about what happened over the past weekend. Tory rags on Chipotle’s new “queso” sauce, while Philip talks about being gay at summer camp and tells the story of how he and his husband dated the same girl when they were in the closet Additional topics: Reese Witherspoon Big Little Lies Raising twins and all the mischief they get into Dieting Yom Kippur Body image issues from living in Los Angeles House guests Dog farts Pooh jokes How Eddie embarrasses Philip by pooping in front of DILFs Exfoliation and cleaning regimens George Michael passing Disney characters people look like

Over a traditional dirty vodka martini with olives thanks to our friends at Postmates who will deliver anything! For a $20 credit on your alcohol or beverage deliveries, use coupon code: BSDRINKS. Philip’s renovation begins and we talk about life without access to our liquor cabinet. There's a brief discussion of the Harvey Weinstein scandal and the #METOO movement. Philip and Tory briefly share sexual abuse and harassment stories from working in showbiz and Hollywood. Tory shares her sexual harassment video on youtube. Tory announces a new segment “What do you buy Philip for his birthday when you have 26 minutes alone at Safeway?” We talk about origami cootie catchers and what it feels like turning 36 around a big family Thanksgiving. A recap of the “Gals and Gays” weekend in Guerneville (Russian River weekend) with a bunch of drunk middle-aged women we had to explain el Negro de Whatsapp and certain words during a raucous game of Cards Against Humanity. There’s a discussion of life post Nor Cal fires, getting punked by displaced chefs, and how appreciative they are of life. Advice on gift giving and an embarrassing birthday dinner moment at State Bird Provisions. Rumors about Yelp are dispelled and Tory raves about “No Wait” their new awesome feature where you can get into a restaurant without the wait. Brief discussion of children’s programming Word Party and Wonder Pets. Additional topics: Whitney Houston Stranger Things Prolapsed anuses Radio personality Delilah Body types that can support bangs Pubis mons Legal marijuana Tory’s obsession with contiguous holiday songs leading up to the winter holiday Big “thank you!” to Priya Mapara for designing our Bay Seasoning podcast logo.

Over a signature cocktail “Smoky Arnold Palmer” of vodka, smoked English breakfast tea and lemon juice, Tory recaps the lessons learned throwing a giant 2-year-old birthday party for kids screaming, crying, and vomiting. The best gift for a kids’ party is a case of wine for the parents and NO gifts where assembly is required, please. Opinions are shared about dog-friendly wineries and Tory wonders who is actually allergic at the preschool. Love or hate putting IKEA furniture together and working for TaskRabbit. Philip confuses the “sit and spin” the toy with a wild night out in the Castro. The world wants to know if President Trump had a stroke after listening to his speech on relocating the embassy in Jerusalem and Philip briefly explains why this move is a serious act that’s going to piss off the Muslim community It’s the 9-year anniversary of Philip and Jonathan’s relationship with a recap of their first date and magical wedding day with tips on how to have an amazing wedding on a small budget. Additional topics: The ins and outs of ordering a martini Denver wedding cake case Prince Harry and Meghan Markle wedding announcement Jared Kushner is bad for the Jews Urinary tract infection (UTI) scares Embarrassing urologist visits Potty training How much is too much to spend on a pet’s health? Purell: the downfall of society Foreskin trees The “Ask me anything game” There’s a lot of hate in the world today

Over an original cocktail called a "Ginger & Gay" which is simple syrup, vodka, fresh lime juice and soda water,. Tory regales us with her thoughts on switching from the British Anglican faith to Judaism, while Philip explains Rosh Hashanah and blowing...shofars. Cheese is “fat man’s candy” and the discussion turns to the five main trans categories: transgender, transsexual, transvestite, etc. Tory talks briefly about her time in the Kinky Boots musical. Philip shares a racist backstory on his Chinese neighbors. Tory gives a brief review of Mandy Aftel’s new book The Art of Flavor: Practices and Principles for Creating Delicious Food on fermentation and flavor combos. New segment “Unconditional love on the weekends” is introduced. A new approach to sharing cancer news with friends and family is discussed. Tory comes to grips with being a SAHM (stay at home mom). Home renovations begin with San Francisco housing scams. Additional topics: Pooh talk Embarrassing dog poop stories Having an audience when you poop Rewarding kids’ good behavior with food It’s fall y’all! Sweet potatoes everywhere Adorable Halloween costumes for 2-year olds

Over a signature cocktail of lemon juice, vodka and LaCroix club soda, we meet our hilarious hosts: Tory Ross Roman and Philip Andrew Hall. We hear how the two met on a Honeymoon Israel trip where drunk Tory sang Barbara Streisand hits at Philip’s big fat gay wedding in the Galilee. They share a list of potential podcast names and discuss their journey to the mic. While Tory talks about her transition from starring in Broadway musicals to a life in food service as a stay-at-home-mom with two-year-old twins who are always sick, Philip doses of, before plugging his blog EatsPorkJew.com and explains why “good Jews” don’t eat pork. Additional topics: Breasts Breastfeeding Weight loss Diets Children and why they’re always sick Hurting your mangina from riding a bike The difficulties of making friends in your 30s Home renovations vs divorce Emotional manipulation Food tours in San Francisco with Avital Tours Dogs with ass cancer Amazing Israeli food The importance of updating your Bitmoji Anjelica Houston