Podcasts about embarrassing

(0:00) Bills hire Joe Brady as HC, ‘Embarrassing' Shedeur Sanders made the Pro Bowl? (27:41) Eagles still looking for OC, Does Maye & Darnold making the Super Bowl impact Josh Allen? (40:49) Will Mike McCarthy bring back Aaron Rodgers? (47:44) Mahomes Mountain (01:09:15) Patriots credit pie Did the Bills get better by promoting Joe Brady? (01:24:05) ‘Not a given' Lamar Jackson returns to Ravens (01:30:27) Danny's Top Ten Most Successful Teams (01:54:17) What is the Steelers' ceiling under Mike McCarthy? (02:03:55) What does reaching the Super Bowl mean for Sam Darnold? (02:12:18) Should Bill Belichick be a First-Ballot Hall of Famer? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Seth and Sean discuss Lopez calling the AFC title game embarrassing and if playing conference title games at neutral or domed stadiums would actually fix the 'weather problem.'

Seth and Sean discuss Lopez calling the AFC title game embarrassing for the NFL and what may fix that perception, lay out the NFL Head Coaching jobs still open along with the betting favorites for each, talk about Shedeur Sanders making the Pro Bowl, and if they even asked CJ Stroud first, and see what Reggie and Lopez's question of the day is all about.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

On the latest episode of Pickaxe and Roll from Number Thirty-Eight, Ryan Blackburn and Danny Bailey discuss the Denver Nuggets big win in frozen Milwaukee last night. They talk Giannis Antetokounmpo and Aaron Gordon injuries as well as Nikola Jokic and his potential return. Finally, they discuss the upcoming Watch Parties for Mile High Sports and a Golden Age in Denver Sports. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

After missing the AI revolution and failing with Siri, Apple has been forced to strike a humiliating, multi-year deal with Google to use Gemini on all its products. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week, Johnny and the Thang Gang are joined by Hollywood royalty. Bradley Cooper AND Will Arnett join them in the studio. We have embarrassing parent stories and the Royal Mint building is being refurbed ready for the Chinese Embassy. Hear Johnny on Radio X every weekday at 4pm across the UK on digital radio, 104.9FM in London, 97.7FM in Manchester, on Global Player or via www.radiox.co.uk

We talk about Vanderbilt's loss at Arkansas and also the home loss to Florida, and the hook-and-hold calls that had a major impact on the game. Also, how much will Frankie Collins help when he returns? Will weather impact Vanderbilt basketball in the upcoming week? And, a few football notes in addition to answering your mailbag questions. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Smashing the Patriarchy (With Laughter): Why It's Time for Women to Rise This episode is pure empowerment… with a side of uncontrollable laughter. We're having an honest, hilarious, and wildly liberating conversation about the patriarchy, the outdated rules women have been expected to live by, and why none of it actually makes sense when you say it out loud. Through funny stories, real-life moments, and a lot of “wait… are you serious?” realizations, we explore how women have been conditioned to shrink — and why that conditioning is finally losing its grip. We talk about:

(SPOILER) Your Daily Roundup covers Bachelorette things, this Beckham family mess is embarrassing, Taylor Sheridan's new show, and answering a couple of your Reader Emails.   Music written by Jimmer Podrasky (B'Jingo Songs/Machia Music/Bug Music BMI) Ads: Factor Meals - 50% off your first box PLUS free breakfast for a year at https://factormeals.com/realitysteve50off Promo Code: realitysteve50off Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Are you using AI to create content for your personal brand? You might be destroying the trust you've worked so hard to build. When your online persona is crafted by AI but your in-person presence doesn't match, your audience can feel it. Best selling author of "Good Awkward" and keynote speaker Henna Pryor calls this mismatch "incongruence," and it's one of the biggest dangers for creators, thought leaders, and speakers today. We break down why an authentic voice is more important than ever and how to use modern tools without sacrificing the soul of your brand and your voice.What value do we place on creativity?Watch on YouTubeExecutive Personal Brand & Media Coaching Session: Book a 1:1 with me: emilybinder.com/call (4 available per month)Chapters:(0:00) The #1 Mistake Creators Make With AI(2:15) What is "Incongruence"? (The "Bad Vibe" Explained)(4:50) Why Our Brains Are Hardwired to Detect Fakes(7:31) When Your AI Persona Doesn't Match Your Real Voice(10:04) The Expert Whose Speaking Doesn't Match Their Writing(13:28) Henna Pryor: "It Lacks Soul"(16:40) Are You "Gamifying" Your Online Presence?(19:15) How Incongruence Destroys Audience Trust(22:30) Savvy Audiences Now Value Congruency More Than Ever(25:42) How to Use AI Tools Authentically(28:55) Final Thoughts: Your Voice is Your Value(31:00) ThinkersOne - Keynotes and Thought Leadership Video Marketplace (Mitch Joel)Watch: YouTube clips playlistLinks mentioned:Article: Pew Research: How Americans View AI and Its Impact on People and Society1950s AI song: 7.8 million views: viral AI music... "my shoes forgot how to follow the ground": Enlly Blue - Through My SoulBook: "Good Awkward: How to Embrace the Embarrassing and Celebrate the Cringe to Become the Bravest You" by Henna PryorFeatured 15-min videos - shop ThinkersOne marketplace:- Henna Pryor: How to Make Impossible Changes Possible- Emily Binder: From AI Hype to Human ImpactConnect with Henna Pryor:https://pryoritygroup.comhttps://www.linkedin.com/in/hennapryor/https://www.instagram.com/hennapryor/New Virtual Workshop: Podcast SurgeryDetails at emilybinder.com/callBook directly on CalendlyShop my podcast apps & gear (promo links):Record guests and create Magic Clips on Riverside: emilybinder.com/riversideRecord + edit like a Word Doc with AI - Descript: emilybinder.com/descriptMy mic gearVideo podcast gear listOrganized lists - all products I recommend: Amazon Storefront: amazon.com/shop/emilybinderHire me - virtual coaching: Business Advisory, Executive Media + Personal Branding, or Marketing Strategy: emilybinder.com/callConnect:This podcast | My website | Beetle Moment Marketing | LinkedIn | X | Instagram | TikTok | YouTube | Email updates Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Postgame: It all went wrong for the 49ers vs. the Seahawks Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

PLUS - Alonso Axed By Real Madrid A look back at the week of sport, and a look ahead of this weekend's action, with Andy & Gary - THE SPORTCAST (Ep 200!) 00:00 - Intro 02:30 - Andy's Skiing Accident 04:00 - Supporting England 15:00 - TikTok Trends 19:00 - Gambling Punishment 25:00 - Tennis 35:00 - AFCON 42:00 - Semenyo To City 45:00 - Everton Out Of FA Cup 52:00 - Wirtz Proving His Quality 58:00 - Weekend Predictions 01:02:00 - Carrick To United 01:09:00 - Alonso Axed From Madrid   Join us on Patreon for our Betting Show, Bonus Episodes and all of the other Patreon Perks... https://www.patreon.com/legitpodcast Shout out to our sponsors... The Feathers - Bootle | https://www.instagram.com/the.feathersbootle/ Hill Dickinson | https://www.hilldickinson.com/ Comoletics | Get 30% off with code "LEGIT30" at checkout https://comoletics.com/   #Liverpool #LFC #Everton #EFC #Sport #Podcast #PremierLeague #Podcast #Sports #Football #News #Slot #England #WorldCup #AFCON

The Rebel News podcasts features free audio-only versions of select RebelNews+ content and other Rebel News long-form videos, livestreams, and interviews. Monday to Friday enjoy the audio version of Ezra Levant's daily TV-style show, The Ezra Levant Show, where Ezra gives you his contrarian and conservative take on free speech, politics, and foreign policy through in-depth commentary and interviews. Wednesday evenings you can listen to the audio version of The Gunn Show with Sheila Gunn Reid the Chief Reporter of Rebel News. Sheila brings a western sensibility to Canadian news. With one foot in the oil patch and one foot in agriculture, Sheila challenges mainstream media narratives and stands up for Albertans. If you want to watch the video versions of these podcasts, make sure to begin your free RebelNewsPlus trial by subscribing at http://www.RebelNewsPlus.com

What's the most embarrassing thing to happen to you while on a date? See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Kids roast parents in this hilarious episode of Stay Outta My Fridge as Matt (Beard Laws) and his co-host break down the most cringy things adults do — from embarrassing dance moves to confusing rules that make absolutely no sense to kids. In this funny dad and daughter podcast episode, we put parents on trial and let kids tell the truth. Why do adults overcomplicate cooking? Why does the phrase “I'll tell you when you're older” instantly shut kids down? And why is public dancing the fastest way to embarrass your child? We also jump into sports card collecting with kids, talking about building a personal collection, hunting for Josh Allen and Buffalo Bills cards, and why collecting can be a fun way for parents and kids to connect. Whether you're a parent trying to understand Gen Alpha or just want a good laugh, this episode delivers real talk, honest humor, and family-friendly chaos. In this episode: • Kids roasting cringy parents • The fastest way to embarrass your kid in public • Words that make kids instantly stop listening • Sports card collecting with kids (Josh Allen & Bills cards) • Why parents overcomplicate simple things • The great debate: Dinner vs Supper COMMENT BELOW: What embarrasses kids the most — dancing parents or bad dad jokes? About the Beard Laws Network The Beard Laws Network delivers weekly shows covering parenting humor, family comedy, sports culture, true crime, conspiracies, and strange real-life stories. New episodes every week. Watch More: ️ Beard Laws Network Shorts: https://www.youtube.com/@BeardLawsNetwork/shorts ️ Main Beard Laws Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@BeardLaws Follow on Socials: TikTok • Instagram • Facebook https://linktr.ee/beardlaws Like, comment, and share — it helps the channel grow more than you thinkFriends of the show: Live Bearded - https://livebearded.com Yellow Leaf Hammocks - https://www.yellowleafhammocks.com/products/the-vista Shinesty - https://shinesty.com/?ref=beardlaws Want your fridge roasted? Share your weirdest item in the comments for a future Fridge Detective segment! Like, share, and subscribe to join the Stay Outta My Fridge community! Your support helps us grow! Stay curious with Beard Laws Studio—Stay Outta My Fridge: Your go-to for family entertainment! Listen to Full Episodes & Clips ➜ Beard Laws Network Shorts: https://www.youtube.com/@BeardLawsNetwork/shorts ➜ Main Beard Laws Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@BeardLaws Follow on Socials TikTok, Instagram, Facebook, and more → https://linktr.ee/beardlaws Support the Show Like, comment, and share this episode — it helps the Network grow a TON! If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a 5-star review on your favorite podcast app! It's the best way to help our family show reach more people.This has been The Stay Outta My Fridge Podcast, your source for family comedy, snack reviews, and '90s nostalgia.Find us on social media The Stay Outta My Fridge Podcast is a part of the Bleav Network. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Steelers show no answers ... show no pride against the Texans ... it's just embarrassing. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Join NFL Legends James "Deebo" Harrison and Joe Haden as react to the NFL Wild Card Playoff Round action where Aaron Rodgers and the Pittsburgh Steelers season comes to an end after a loss to CJ Stroud and the Houston Texans. Deebo & Joe break down what went wrong for the Steelers and what the upcoming offseason holds. Timeline:00:00 - Texans beats Steelers47:09 - Texans Super Bowl chances1:00:47 - Mike Tomlin's future (Timestamps may vary based on advertisements.) #Club #NightcapSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Bomani Jones starts off the Show by reacting to the Eagles embarrassing loss to the 49ers & Josh Allen leading the Bills over the Jaguars. Later, he discusses the Matt LaFleur & John Harbaugh coaching rumors & debates whether hiring Harbaugh would be a good idea. Later, he reacts to the ICE shooting in Minnesota and the one piece everyone is missing with that tragedy. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Use our code for 10% off your next SeatGeek order*: https://seatgeek.onelink.me/RrnK/LAPLATICA10 Sponsored by SeatGeek. *Restrictions apply. Max $20 discount The Boily Pops sat down in the studio for the first time this year and things quickly got emotional. On this episode of La Plática, Josh and Sebastian discuss what their priorities are for 2026, how that affects the show, and why they're excited to be embarrassed.

Mary Katharine Ham, Fox News Contributor, Outkick Columnist, and co-author of End of Discussion, joined the Guy Benson Show today to discuss to the ICE-involved shooting in Minneapolis and the explicit lying and fallout from leftists around the deadly shooting. Mary Katharine and Guy then stayed on the topic of Minnesota to discuss the ongoing fraud in the state, and the pair reacted to Rep. Ilhan Omar's lack of concern for the taxpayer waste in the face of the fraud. Finally, MKH discussed the situation regarding the backlash comedian Bowen Yang received while criticizing Jasmine Crockett as a Senate candidate, and you can listen to the full interview below! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hear all about my time in the bars of Osaka and Fukuoka at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠EasyStoriesInEnglish.com/Support⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Your support is appreciated! Christmas in Japan isn't like Christmas in the UK. For one thing, it includes humiliation. It also includes very strange food. And don't forget the hot springs! Vocabulary: Elephant in the room, Onsen, Thatched house, Bullet train, Purikura, Chazuke Go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠EasyStoriesInEnglish.com/Japan for the full transcript. 00:00 Preview 00:31 Intro 01:34 The elephant in the room 03:23 New Year's resolutions 07:03 A spicy train journey 12:25 The hotel tricked me! 14:19 A smooth flight 15:57 The little things 18:32 Public behaviour 20:38 The wonderful resort 23:26 My first onsen experience 27:41 Let's go to the murder village! 34:13 The panda has left the building 36:14 Meeting the locals 39:15 Pew pew trains 40:51 Bright lights, big city 42:25 Ariel, you tease! 43:58 Welcome to the New World 46:54 The magical disappearing hangover 49:09 Onwards to Fukuoka! 50:51 Embarrassing ourselves at the Pretty Club 52:54 Crooning like robots 53:59 Exploring Fukuoka 57:23 But what about Christmas? 59:34 Culture shock-ish 01:02:35 Outro Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

DuckTerritory's Matt Prehm, Erik Skopil and John Evans get together to discuss Friday's embarrassing defeat to Indiana in the College Football Playoff semifinals. The three discuss went wrong, how this feels big picture and what the fans are feeling about this one. To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

HOUR 2- Embarrassing Injuries, Johnny Doesn't Know and MORE full 2011 Fri, 09 Jan 2026 16:41:00 +0000 UHDNCuawM15dsSia7K5OYreOWZOvmSu2 society & culture Klein/Ally Show: The Podcast society & culture HOUR 2- Embarrassing Injuries, Johnny Doesn't Know and MORE Klein.Ally.Show on KROQ is more than just a "dynamic, irreverent morning radio show that mixes humor, pop culture, and unpredictable conversation with a heavy dose of realness." (but thanks for that quote anyway). Hosted by Klein, Ally, and a cast of weirdos (both on the team and from their audience), the show is known for its raw, offbeat style, offering a mix of sarcastic banter, candid interviews, and an unfiltered take on everything from culture to the chaos of everyday life. With a loyal, engaged fanbase and an addiction for pushing boundaries, the show delivers the perfect blend of humor and insight, all while keeping things fun, fresh, and sometimes a little bit illegal. 2024 © 2021 Audacy, Inc. Society & Culture False https://player.amperwavepodcastin

Today on Valentine In The Morning: We talked about the everyday little things that somehow became way too expensive. Then listeners admitted the skills they’re secretly (and slightly embarrassingly) really good at. Listen live every weekday from 5–10am Pacific: https://www.iheart.com/live/1043-myfm-173/Website: 1043myfm.com/valentineInstagram: @ValentineInTheMorningFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/valentineinthemorningTikTok: @ValentineInTheMorningSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What's it like to date a man? Ask Sabrina Carpenter, Olivia Dean, or your friends, and you might hear it's a struggle. Today we're bringing you an episode of NPR's It's Been a Minute. Host Brittany Luse and NPR Music Editor Hazel Cills break down a phenomenon called “heteropessimism.”Learn more about sponsor message choices: podcastchoices.com/adchoicesNPR Privacy Policy

Spit Hit for Jan 8th, 2026:It's a brand new episode of the funniest podcast around. On this episode we get dumb with some Would You Rather, help the world with some Life Advice before wrapping things up with a Most Embarrasing Things That Can Happen on a Date Draft. Re-brand Mondays with some comedy! Subscribe and tell your friends about another funny episode of The Spitballers Comedy Podcast!Connect with the Spitballers Comedy Podcast:Become an Official Spitwad: SpitballersPod.comFollow us on X: x.com/SpitballersPodFollow us on IG: Instagram.com/SpitballersPodSubscribe on YouTube: YouTube.com/Spitballers Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

What's the most embarrassing way you've injured yourself? "A box fan fell on my head and gave me a concussion in college"See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

On this episode of the JT Sports Podcast, JT breaks down why Alabama Crimson Tide football doesn't scare anybody anymore after Round 2 of the CFP, and why Alabama Crimson Tide football has gone from trench bullies to a finesse team that gets pushed around when the lights get bright. JT explains how the SEC is being exposed, how the Alabama Crimson Tide football team lost its psychological edge, and why Indiana is so hard to beat because they don't beat themselves. JT also dives into Ole Miss clowning Lane Kiffin and how insane it would look if that roster wins it all right after he bolts. Then JT calls his shot: Miami is the most violent team left, and if it's Miami vs Indiana, it's a straight-up mismatch.

A Chinese shopping mall's radical solution to bathroom smokers accidentally preaches one of the most uncomfortable truths in Scripture.SERMON TRANSCRIPT…https://weirddarkness.com/COTU-TransparentBathroomStallsWeird Darkness® and Church Of The Undead™ are trademarked. Copyright © 2025.#WeirdDarkness #ChurchOfTheUndead #ChristianPodcast #WeirdNews #TransparentDoors #GodSeesEverything #EvangelicalSermon #WalkInTheLight #BibleTeaching #ViralChina

Local 12 Digital Sports Columnist and Editor Richard Skinner was joined by Mike Petraglia from CLNS media to analyze the Cincinnati Bengals loss to the Cleveland Browns on Sunday, Jan. 4, 2026. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

We investigate. This episode was produced by Avishay Artsy, edited by Amina Al-Sadi, fact-checked by Laura Bullard, engineered by Patrick Boyd, and hosted by Astead Herndon. Photo credit Eder Paisan/Getty Images. Listen to Today, Explained ad-free by becoming a Vox Member: vox.com/members. New Vox members get $20 off their membership right now. Transcript at ⁠vox.com/today-explained-podcast.⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A Classic RISK! episode from our early years that first ran in September of 2013, when Kevin Allison, Jen Bosworth, Donna Steele and Dare Campbell all shared stories of humiliation.

Bobby's health journey this year has included tennis elbow treatment, peptides, and testosterone. Now, he had an appointment for shockwave therapy but got cold feet because he was not prepared to expose himself. | Jay is excited for the SiriusXM "fishbowl" show but discouraged to find out that only 15 people could attend. | Jay had a gig with Shane Gillis and Jacob attended with his nephews. Backstage Shane was busting his chops about having crushes on dudes. *To hear the full show to go www.siriusxm.com/bonfire to learn more! FOLLOW THE CREW ON SOCIAL MEDIA: @thebonfiresxm @louisjohnson @christinemevans @bigjayoakerson @robertkellylive @louwitzkee @jjbwolf Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of The Bonfire ad-free and a whole week early.  Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Let's talk about Trump's budget embarrassing the US....

In this episode, the focus is on clergy abuse—a topic made even more pressing by recent headlines. The featured guest, Sandy Phillips Kirkham, shares her harrowing ordeal of being abused by a charismatic youth pastor starting at the age of 16. Sandy discusses the grooming process, the five years of abuse, and how she was ultimately expelled from her church while her abuser was merely relocated. She delves into the long-lasting impact of the abuse on her life and her spiritual journey, how she concealed her trauma for 27 years, and how she ultimately confronted her abuser. Sandy also provides valuable insights and actionable advice for preventing abuse and supporting victims within church communities. Her story is also detailed in her book, ‘Let Me Prey on You,' which offers a detailed account of her journey from victim to advocate. 00:00 Introduction and Sponsor Message 00:47 Welcome to the Podcast 01:32 Introducing Today's Topic: Clergy Abuse 02:17 Sandy Phillips Kirkham's Early Life and Church Involvement 06:22 Meeting the Abuser: The Charismatic Youth Pastor 08:43 Red Flags and Grooming Tactics 13:51 The First Inappropriate Act 16:37 The Abuse Escalates 21:06 The Aftermath and Church's Response 28:15 Life After Abuse: Marriage and Keeping Secrets 32:09 Protecting Future Generations 35:17 The Importance of Sex Education in the Church 36:32 Techniques for Discussing Sex with Children 37:22 Personal Experiences with Sex Education 38:20 Triggering Memories and Emotional Breakdown 40:13 The Journey of Healing Begins 41:31 Understanding Clergy Abuse and Self-Forgiveness 43:52 Confronting the Abuser 47:07 Challenges in Seeking Justice 54:47 Preventing Abuse in the Church 01:00:31 Supporting Victims of Clergy Abuse 01:05:07 Final Thoughts and Resources Sandy Kirkham and her husband Bill enjoy life with their two grown children, two beautiful granddaughters, and two fairly well-behaved dogs. Sandy continues to use her voice to help victims of clergy abuse. She currently serves on the board of Council Against Child Abuse. Sandy has spoken before the Ohio Senate, a Maryland court, and appeared on a local television show in Boston. Her story, “Stolen Innocence,” was told in a documentary produced by The Hope of Survivors. Sandy works with survivors conducting victim support conferences. She has participated in The Voice of the Faithful (VOTF) panels moderated by SNAP (Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests), sharing her perspective from the non-Catholic point of view. Sandy has been a presenter/speaker at major events on clergy abuse including the Hope & Healing Conference. Sandy has earned a certificate of completion from the Faith Trust Institute entitled, “A Sacred Trust: Boundary Issues for Clergy and Spiritual Teachers.” https://sandyphillipskirkham.com/ https://www.facebook.com/KirkhamAuthor/  sandykirkhamauthor@gmail.com  Purchase her book “Let Me Prey Upon You” on amazon: https://sandyphillipskirkham.com/shop/let-me-prey-upon-you/   Link Tree   Website: https://dswministries.org Subscribe to the podcast: https://dswministries.org/subscribe-to-podcast/ Social media links: Join our Private Wounds of the Faithful FB Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1603903730020136 Twitter: https://twitter.com/DswMinistries YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCxgIpWVQCmjqog0PMK4khDw/playlists Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dswministries/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DSW-Ministries-230135337033879 Keep in touch with me! Email subscribe to get my handpicked list of the best resources for abuse survivors! https://thoughtful-composer-4268.ck.page #abuse #trauma Affiliate links: Our Sponsor: 753 Academy: https://www.753academy.com/ Can't travel to The Holy Land right now? The next best thing is Walking The Bible Lands! Get a free video sample of the Bible lands here! https://www.walkingthebiblelands.com/a/18410/hN8u6LQP An easy way to help my ministry: https://dswministries.org/product/buy-me-a-cup-of-tea/ A donation link: https://dswministries.org/donate/   Sandy Phillips Kirkham [00:00:00] Special thanks to 7 5 3 Academy for sponsoring this episode. No matter where you are in your fitness and health journey, they've got you covered. They specialize in helping you exceed your health and fitness goals, whether that is losing body fat, gaining muscle, or nutritional coaching to match your fitness levels. They do it all with a written guarantee for results so you don't waste time and money on a program that doesn't exceed your goals. There are martial arts programs. Specialize in anti-bullying programs for kids to combat proven Filipino martial arts. They take a holistic, fun, and innovative approach that simply works. Sign up for your free class now. It's 7 5 3 academy.com. Find the link in the show notes. Welcome to the Wounds of the Faithful Podcast, brought to you by DSW Ministries. Your host is singer songwriter, speaker and domestic violence advocate, [00:01:00] Diana Winkler. She is passionate about helping survivors in the church heal from domestic violence and abuse and trauma. This podcast is not a substitute for professional counseling or qualified medical help. Now here is Diana. Hello. Welcome everyone. Welcome to my regular listeners, as well as some new listeners that have joined us today. I have a great guest for you today. We're going to be talking about clergy abuse today. Religious leader, abuse. Pastor, youth leader. You've seen this in the news recently with all these preachers being arrested or charged with sexual misconduct or rape or [00:02:00] pedophilia. I'm sure you've seen the news. Well, today we're going to hear a story about a woman who's been victimized in that way and she's fighting back. So let me read her bio for you. A church is where an insecure 16-year-old girl should feel welcome, happy, and most importantly, safe tragically. For some, the church can become a place of great harm. Sandy Phillips Kirkham details her account of how charismatic youth minister preyed upon her, a betrayal which left her broken with a shattered faith and the ultimate shame of being blamed enforced from the church she loved. Despite a successful and happy life, is a wife, mother, and friend. Sandy successfully concealed her abuse for [00:03:00] 27 years until a trigger forced her to face the truth. Sandy's story will take you on her journey of healing. Her strength and courage will inspire you. Let me pray upon you her book details. Sandy's journey from innocent 16-year-old, a victim to a survivor, and advocate. We please welcome Sandy Phillips. Kirk, welcome Sandy to the show. Thanks so much for coming on. Well, thank you for having me. I'm glad to be here. Wow. So I've been listening to you on the Preacher Boys podcast and thought you had a really great story, and so I wanted to come and bring you on so my listeners can hear your story as well. Mm-hmm. So tell us a little bit about your home and your church environment growing up. Let's [00:04:00] start from the beginning here. Okay. I'm the oldest of five. My parents were divorced when I was about seven, which that was really the impact of my life, of just how it altered everything about that time in my life. Then my mother remarried and we moved in with my stepfather shortly after my father remarried, and so I was dealing with these blended families and it was just very confusing for me at the time, my parents and stepfather did not attend church. So I, I wasn't a part of a church until I was about eight, and that's when my best friend who lived up the street invited me to go with their family, and I went with them and I went every Sunday after that, I absolutely fell in love with church. It was a place that I felt safe. I think it provided for me a place away from home that I felt comfortable and I got attention there. I was very active even as a small child. I went to vacation Bible school, church camp, love Sunday School. I sang in a junior choir. Really, it was a just a great place for me to [00:05:00] be. When I was 13, I was baptized and then my faith really deepened and my involvement in the church became even more so, started teaching Sunday school and teaching vacation Bible school. I started serving on committees with adults and doing more of the activities that would, , just be more in depth than just typical youth group activities. So, it's just no exaggeration to say that if the doors of the church were open, I was there and I loved it. I loved serving God. I felt that was the place for me, and everything about it was brought me joy and peace in the church. Wow. You really, were very sincere in your faith. It was not a fake one. I hear a lot of stories of. Being brought up in the church and being made to go to church and, you just go through the motions kind of thing. But it sounds like it was the opposite for you. It was that you really believed this with all your heart. Was that a fundamental Baptist church you were going [00:06:00] to or what? It was a church, Christ Christian Church, which is similar to the Baptist. It's an independent church. Yeah, that's the church. That was so something happened while you were serving the Lord and loving God. You met your abuser? Yes. Shortly after I turned 16, our church hired a new youth pastor, and from the moment he arrived, he was totally different than anyone we'd ever seen before. He was very charismatic, very dynamic. His sermons were really like nothing we'd ever heard before, and people were just drawn to him. He had a personality that people found themselves wanting to be around him. They wanted to please him. So he was very good at asking people to do things and they didn't hesitate. It, it was just a different kind of atmosphere. When he came to the church, the youth group exploded in numbers. We went from like 25 to almost 200 in a very short time. Even the [00:07:00] adult church was growing because people just came to hear him preach because he was so good at what he did. He was 30, married with two children, but he really acted more like our age group. He dressed like we did. He. Went to our football games at school, he knew our music. So he just, he really, he was tuned into us and in return we found ourselves, all of us being willing to please him and wanna do anything we could to make the youth group and the church better. So when people think of a profile of a child abuser, they usually think, oh, some dirty old man, that his roaming fingers or what have you, but this youth pastor sounded like, okay, he was really good looking and hip and really loved the young people. Mm-hmm. Is that typical of. Well, it's, it's typical in the sense that it's not the, dirty old man hiding in the bushes. Most abusers [00:08:00] are people we know. They're people that we like. They're usually people that, connect with people very well, and that's what makes them so dangerous because they're not obvious with what they do, and they're very good at that. They pretend to be one of us. They pretend to care, but in reality, their goal is to find a way to take advantage of the most vulnerable in, in the group. And so, predators are usually drawn to places where they will find vulnerable people. The gymnastics team is an example of that. The Boy Scouts, anywhere where you can, and certainly the church because we are welcoming into people who are in need. Oftentimes. Then there are many people in the church who are vulnerable to these types of men, and sometimes women. Were there any red flags? That you should have seen or noticed when you were around this youth pastor? Well, he came with so many different ideas and different ways of doing things. And one of the things that he was doing now, this was in the [00:09:00] seventies, so cultures were changing and it was free love and kind of thing. But he came into our church and he expected everyone to hug each other. So we were always hugging each other. And he also expected us to say how much we loved each other and that we love you and not just that I love you in Christ. He would simply walk up, give you a hug and say, I love you. Now you know, that may seem innocent, but that's a little odd for that pastor to be saying those kinds of things. And it also blurs the lines because when you say to someone, I love you, that can be confusing to. Young teenagers and even to vulnerable adults. So, but he did that with everybody. It wasn't like he picked someone else special, but, so the hugging in the contact was kind of a red flag in the beginning. But for me personally, I babysat for his family. His wife worked evenings. Mm-hmm. So one night after he came home, he asked me to go to his basement and listen to a song by Neil Diamond. [00:10:00] Well, it felt a little weird 'cause I'd never. I've been around a pastor that wanted to talk to me about anything but church in the Bible. But I went to the basement. Yeah. I mean a Neil Diamond song. So I went to the basement. I know, but that's a trigger factor for me sometimes. So anyway, I went to the basement and he put this record on and I sat down on the couch and instead of sitting in a chair or another place, he came on the couch and sat very close to me. And I remember feeling uncomfortable, but I didn't say anything. 'cause I thought, well, he is just sitting next to me. It's no big deal. But that's a red flag that I felt because it felt uncomfortable to me. And then the other times that I would babysit for him. His wife wouldn't come home till late in the evening, so he would come home around seven or eight and after the kids were in bed, instead of taking me home, he wanted me to sit and talk with him all evening. So we'd talk about the Bible or we'd talk about church, and sometimes he'd ask me what I thought of his [00:11:00] sermon, which at age 16, I'm flattered that this man has any idea that I would have some opinion about this great sermon that he just gave. So I didn't see anything wrong with that because he's my pastor. But had that occurred with my 30-year-old neighbor down the street, every time I went to babysit, I know I would've come home to my mother and said, okay, this is weird. Mm-hmm. Every time I babysit, this man wants to sit and talk to me all evening. I mean, what interest would I have as a teenager wanting to talk to this 30-year-old married man? But because my pastor was who he was and he tapped into our common connection of the church and God, and again, many times he would give me books to read 'cause he wanted me to get better in my deep, in my spirituality. So I didn't see anything wrong with it because of who he was. And so I just accepted that behavior, which is another tool and technique. They look for ways to get into you. Mm-hmm. [00:12:00] That don't seem obvious. And that was, so those were two red flags for me. Now as far as the congregation goes, I was in his office a lot by myself, but so were other kids, because he would actually call us into his office and say, I want you to come in and tell me what's going on in your life. Talk to me about your problems. Instead of us going to him, he would encourage us to come into his office. So while that probably wasn't a good thing, no one saw it as a bad thing. It seemed normal, but he called me into his office a lot more than the other kids. And later on there were people who did say to me, there were times when I wondered why he said something to you like that, or I noticed something one time. And so I think people notice some things, but no one thought enough of it to say, okay, there's something going on that doesn't seem right. So those were the red flags that I think in the beginning were very subtle. But they were hard to see, [00:13:00] and this is really important to distinguish these things because I was groomed by a guidance counselor in seventh grade. Mm-hmm. But he was one of those dirty old men that, he was doing creepy stuff. Yeah. But I never would have seen myself. A pastor and he's talking about spiritual things and he's talking about God and mm-hmm. He's not talking about sex. He's not watching, you're not watching dirty movies together. No, he's not, buying you sexy lingerie. It's, Hey, he's doing spiritual things. Mm-hmm. It's a setup. It's that grooming process you're talking about. It's pulling someone in to gain their trust, in a very di diabolical way, because he's using the church to do that. That's really scary. That scares mm-hmm. Scares me to death. What were the first times that he did something really inappropriate that you were just like, whoa? Well, the very [00:14:00] first time, was after a youth group meeting that was held in my home. I was the song leader. He put me in a leadership position, and it was very important to him that the evening always go well and that we were to make people feel welcome. And so at the end of the evening, I was nervous because I wanted to make sure that he thought everything went well. And he came up to me in my hallway and began telling me how great the evening was and how proud he was of me. And I was on Cloud nine. I was flattered that he felt that way. I felt good that the evening went so well. And then he just slowly bent down and he kissed me. And it wasn't, it was a kiss, but it seemed somewhat innocent to some extent. And I, I remember thinking, I think he just kissed me. Then my next thought was, well, he's my pastor and I don't think he would be doing anything he shouldn't be doing. And it was just a quick kiss. And he's always hugging people. And so maybe this is just his way of showing his appreciation for the evening. It was really [00:15:00] the only way in my 16-year-old mind that I could justify it because I couldn't think about this man doing anything he shouldn't be doing. And this was a person that everyone loved and thought so highly of, so how could I think he was doing something he shouldn't be doing? So I just let it go. I didn't think anything more about it. I mean, did you have any sex ed or anything? Did you know the birds and bees? Nine. Well, yeah, I'm 16. I did. Yeah, I did. But I wasn't, I hadn't dated much. I wasn't allowed to date till I was 16, so I hadn't had any dating experience. I had one kiss before this with a boy at camp. So I wasn't. Worldly or knowledgeable about all those things. But, and again, it was such a quick innocent type kiss. He didn't grab me, he didn't push me against the wall. I just, and again, I think for me it was okay if he's, if this is more than just a kiss, then what do I do with it? So therefore I'm just gonna say it's [00:16:00] nothing because I don't know what else to do. Um, wow. I let it go. I let it go. But as I babysat for him, he, sometimes when I would leave, he would kiss me and sometimes he wouldn't. So, I didn't see it as a con, kind of a continual thing that he was always wanting to kiss me. He always hugged me. But the kissing became more intense as it went along. So it, it would be another year, before he would have sex with me. And so that grooming process and kind of pushing the boundaries each time he was with me, finally ended with him having sex with me. Oh, wow. Now, some of us listening are like an adult having sex with a child or 16-year-old. Can you unpack that a little bit more, the process of how he got to that point? I mean, that the first time you had intercourse, I mean, did he, you know, go to a hotel with you and you had a candlelight dinner, or was it in the backseat of the car?[00:17:00] Was it an accident? It wasn't an accident. He was very deliberate and I had every intentions of having sex with me that night. I babysat, I was babysitting, I put the kids to bed, I walked down the steps. I assumed that we would go into the living room. Or the family room, sit on the couch and talk about the things we always talked about. But instead, he stopped me at the bottom of the stairs and he took me into the living room, and immediately put me on the floor and began undressing me. Um, and wow, I froze. I, I literally froze and I kept thinking to myself, he's going to stop. He's going to stop. And that the entire time he's whispering into my ear how much he loves me, that he would never hurt me, and that he can, I can trust him. And then he kept asking me, do you love me? Do you love me? And I, of course, I'm answering yes, because well, yes I do, because that's what I've told him for the past year. I, I, I just, I was so confused and what my real reaction was, I froze. Mm-hmm. Um, he, he sort of pushed my head under the [00:18:00] stereo. And so when he is starting to get farther than I thought he would ever go. I blocked, I just blocked it out and I started reading the serial numbers underneath the stereo. Oh my goodness. Just to be thinking of anything else. Um, at one point he then just picked me up and took me upstairs. He literally put me on the bed, penetrated me, and that was it. And I was horrified. I was absolutely horrified. I, I wanted to cry. I didn't know what to say. I didn't know what to do. Um, he left the room, told me to get dressed, and he would take me home. And I remember sitting on the bed and I put the bedspread around me because I was so embarrassed that I didn't have my clothes on. Mm-hmm. Oh, wow. Um, and then I just remember thinking I just had sex. I'm no longer a virgin. I just had sex with this man and. He took me home. Now, in the [00:19:00] book, of course, I go into a little bit more detail, but Right, he took me home and just before I got outta the car, he said to me, now, you know, this is something between the two of us, you can't tell anyone. And of course I'm thinking, who would I tell? I, I don't want anybody to know. I just did this. So, that was the first time. And then I think I, at that point I kept thinking, you know, I've had sex with him. So now I'm committed to him again. I'm at this point, I'm 17 years old. I'm still like, what do I do with this? I don't, I don't know what to do with this. Um, and he was convincing me that he loved me. He was convincing me that he needed me in his ministry and that God, this was God's will in our lives. He threw that at me. Eventually he would say to me that we were married in God's eyes. I mean, twisting the scripture and using God as a reason that we should be together. And so. I started to accept that. There were a couple times I went to him and told him that I couldn't do this anymore. I felt [00:20:00] guilty. He would respond in one of two ways. One, he would say to me how much he needed me, how much he loved me, and that he couldn't live without me. So that was the guilt part of it. Or he would respond and by saying to me, you know, you're no longer a virgin. No one else is gonna want you. I'm the only one that knows how to love you, and you are committed to me, and this is gonna be the way it is. And I saw no way out. I didn't see a way out. And so the relationship continued for five years. Wow. Five years. It went on for five years. That is a long time. And it, during that time, he became more aggressive physically. Uh, he hit me. He became sexually more deviant. It just progressed. It got worse and worse. And to a point that I finally, I was, my self-esteem was so low. I hated myself for what I'd been doing. So I finally just accepted that this was my life. I knew [00:21:00] I'd never get married. I knew I'd never have children, and this wouldn't be over until he said it was over. This went on for five years and nobody in the church noticed it. Your parents didn't notice it. You know, people say, well, where were your parents? Well, first of all, my parents were thrilled. I was in church. I mean, this was a time in the seventies when drugs were. Prevalent girls were, having free sex. So for them, what safer place could there be than to be in church? So, and they saw his intention toward me and his involvement with me as a good thing. I mean, he would take me on hospital visits with him. I mean, they saw this as being positive. And they knew how much I loved being there and that it was a place that I liked to go. So they didn't see it. And many in the church didn't see it began because who suspects the pastor of such behavior. Mm-hmm. Yeah. And especially in the seventies when this wasn't an open topic like it is now, you wouldn't have dared thought anything like that. And so [00:22:00] it's not uncommon for people in the church, to miss the signs and to ignore what they really do see, because they just can't believe that it would be something that would be happening in their church because then they'd have to do something about it. Yes, exactly. When did it all come crumbling down? It does crumble. Eventually it does. Two elders became suspicious and followed him one night and found us together in a hotel room. And then from then on, the next month and a half was an absolute nightmare for me. Hmm. It was initially hoped that they could keep what he had done, quiet and keep it from the congregation. Now, I have to say one thing before I forget. This wasn't his first incident of sexual misconduct. Oh. Prior to and just after he was awri, he arrived at our church. A young woman from his first church came forward and accused him of sexual misconduct. When he was [00:23:00] confronted by my elders, he didn't deny it. He said it was true. He asked for forgiveness, that it would never happen again. It was a mistake. So within six months. That's when he was kissing me in my hallway. So this, so these elders were aware that this was the second time that there had been an incident with this man of sexual abuse and misconduct. But in spite of that, they tried to keep it quiet in hopes of moving him to another church. And so I was told during that time where I was to sit, how I was to respond to questions. I wasn't to talk to anyone. I wasn't to tell anyone about what had happened, including my parents. And this was all in an effort to keep it quiet. Well, that effort failed. And so it was determined that he should address the congregation. He did it in a very vague way, just simply said that he'd sinned. He'd sinned against God, and he'd sinned against his wife. And that was his confession. That was it. Two days later, he had me meet [00:24:00] him in a hotel room after that confession in front of the congregation. Now. He was moved to the next church. He was given a going away party. There was actually a vote to maybe keep him, but the vote failed and they decided to move him to the next church. About, two weeks, three weeks later, I was called in by the elders, and this is probably the hardest part of my story for me. Mm-hmm. I was called in by the elders and I was told that because of my behavior I was to leave the church. I was devastated. I loved that church. It was the only church I knew, and here I was being told by these two elders that I wasn't fit to worship there any longer. Mm-hmm. He could be forgiven and given a second, third chance. I couldn't be, I was told that to leave the church. I wasn't given any counseling. I wasn't helped in any way. I was simply told to leave and I did. I left. [00:25:00] And that I told people many times, as horrific as the abuse was, having been told to leave, that church had a greater impact on me spiritually than the actual abuse did. I don't think I ever recovered from that. It still haunts me to this day to some extent. That response of the church really devastated me. So that was the crumbling, as you called it? It came crashing down and I would, I left the church. So did that change your perception of God? What was your relationship with God this time? Yes. You were kicked outta the church, but. Well, I felt a disconnect from God. I never blamed God. I never felt like God caused this to happen. I, in fact, I carry the blame and the shame. I felt guilty for what I had done. And so I never blamed God, but because of the relationship being tied in with God and the [00:26:00] prayers that this man would give, and then, you know, he'd give these wonderful sermons about marriage and sanctity of marriage on a Sunday morning after having sex with me the night before. I had difficulty separating all of that, and there were so many trigger factors associated with the church and prayer that God really did. It was hard for me to have any kind of relationship with God. I did. I didn't become an atheist like a lot of victims do, and who become angry at God. I simply just. I just put him on the back burner. I knew he existed, but I didn't have a connection with him any longer. So for 27 years, I, I never prayed. I never opened my Bible. I went to church because when I met my husband, he was a Methodist. And I thought, well, I'll go to the Methodist Church. It's a different denomination. Mm-hmm. I'll just go on. It should be fine. It didn't work that way. I had anxiety attacks in church. I, his [00:27:00] reminders of him were constant, but I forced myself to go. I made sure that I went because I knew when we had children, I wanted them to have that church experience. But every time I walked past the minister's office, I got a knot in my stomach. Oh yeah. It had nothing to do with that minister. But you understand that. I mean, it, but I did that for 27 years. It became my norm. I just knew that when I walked past that office, I was gonna get a knock my stomach, certain hymns. I can tell you what his favorite hymn was, and every time that was played, that's who I thought of. I couldn't pray. It was so, I did have a deep, deep disconnect for 27 years, and I have to tell you, I missed it. I actually mourn that loss of my spiritual life, but I didn't know how to get it back. Because I'm keeping this secret. I'm still carrying guilt and shame. I couldn't forgive myself. I didn't feel worthy to be in church. So with all of that mixed in, I just put myself on autopilot and said, [00:28:00] well, this is the way my life will be and I'll just have to accept it. It just sounds so unfair. Somebody that loves the Lord so much and served in the church and so innocent and being kicked out. Oh, but it sounded like maybe meeting your husband would've been a positive thing for you. How did you guys meet? I actually worked at his office, so I met him there. We dated for about two years, and I just found him to be a kind, loving soul. He was very unassuming. He wasn't arrogant. He didn't, he wasn't a boastful type of person. He didn't like taking credit for things, even though he deserved it sometimes. He was just a good hearted person, and I just, I fell in love with him immediately. I really did. I thought this was a great, great guy. I mean, I will tell you, I have said many times because before I met him, I was on a destructive path. I did not have any self-esteem. [00:29:00] I saw myself just simply as some sex object that, I was only good for that. And so when I met him, he saved my life because he loved me for who I was and showed me that I was worthy. So I've often said to him, you saved my life, and he will respond back with you made mine, and you can't get any better than that. So meeting him was a turning point for me, but I kept a secret from him for 27 years, and I lived in fear that he'd always find out that I'd had this affair with a married man. And I know in my heart that it wouldn't have made a difference to him. But people who've been abused never forget the words, don't ever tell. And I never forgot those words. And I never forgot what the consequences could be if I were to tell someone. Because when my elders found out, they blamed me. And I, I couldn't bear the thought that if I were to tell him. [00:30:00] Somehow he would find fault with me, or I wondered, would he wonder why I didn't feel confident enough to tell him? Would he feel betrayed that I kept a secret? Would he see me differently sexually? All those fears that I had while unfounded were still present in my mind. And so I never could tell him. And I had to do a lot of play acting and pretending, through our married life in the sense that the times I was having trigger factors, I had to hide them. And I know he would've been supportive, but I couldn't see that. Because while trauma affects you at the time of the abuse, it's lifelong. It doesn't leave you. And so I lived with that for 27 years. So did you have. Intimacy issues when you were together? Was that what you're talking about? The triggering? No, I, know a lot of victims do, and that's understandable. I really didn't, because he was so different from my abuser [00:31:00] and I recognized that my abuser was emotionally violent mm-hmm. And physically, he just wasn't loving in any sense of the word. I was simply used for sex. Mm-hmm. And I didn't have that with my husband. And so I could separate that a little bit. But I think the guilt of hiding the secret had an impact on our marriage as far as my able to be intimate with him in an emotional way. I'm really glad to hear that. I, you are not the first person that I've heard that. The victim has hidden a secret from her husband. I passed her and a pastor's wife and her husband did not know. Mm-hmm. Children didn't know, and it was a family member that was the abuser. And I kept telling her, you've got to tell him. Mm-hmm. You know why? It's because, and I was thinking this when I was listening to your, the other shows that you were on. I'm thinking about your children and your grandchildren. If I was abused, [00:32:00] I would be like. How do I keep my children and grandchildren from going through what I just went through, you know? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Well, that's an interesting thing because most people would assume that my daughter, I would've been all over it and worried sick every time she left the house. Yeah. But I actually had the opposite, reaction because keep in mind, I didn't see myself as an abuse victim. I saw myself as someone who participated, who willingly went into this relationship and stayed in it willingly, which is not the case when you're abused. There's the control, the manipulation, all of those things that play into keeping a victim in a relationship and they see no way out. So for me, I just assumed I got one bad apple in the whole barrel, that this didn't happen to other people and that I had an affair. But my daughter, who I knew, she would never have an affair with a married man, I just knew that. So I. Sent her on [00:33:00] retreats. I sent her to church camp without fear because again, I'm thinking, okay, this just doesn't happen to other people and this is not something I need to be concerned about with her. However, with my granddaughters, it's totally different because now I understand what really occurred and the damage that can occur when you've been abused. And so with my granddaughters, her mom and dad have talked to them, about good touch, bad touch. And I too have talked about to her, but I've been a little bit more probably detailed about it. Mm-hmm. And as she gets older, these men, the techniques change as you get older and they, after they go after teenage girls, so mm-hmm. Hopefully I'll be able to help her understand, what happens when someone's grooming. I want her to understand her personal space, that if you're not comfortable when someone hugs you, it's okay. That's right. Say I, I don't want you to touch me that way. Mm-hmm. Or say if they don't feel comfortable and we put a lot on kids to do that. 'cause here [00:34:00] we're asking a child to say to an adult, no. Mm-hmm. So it's okay to go to your mother or your mom and say, can you tell so and so Uncle Jimmy or whoever it is, I don't wanna be hugged. So we need to make sure our kids understand that their personal space is their space. And if they don't want someone in that space, it's okay to say no. I also think it's important to tell kids that good people can do bad things. Yeah. Because, as we talked about earlier, our abusers are not strangers. They're not mean people. Mm-hmm. They're usually good people. They're usually people who've given us gifts. They're people who help us. They're people who tell us how wonderful we are. So it's hard for children, even adults, to see this individual who. Who on one side is a good individual who does a lot in the church, who's done all these wonderful things. And so we, we have to tell these kids, just because they're a good person doesn't mean they can't do bad things. And so that's kind of the message I hope to get to my granddaughters that I didn't give to my [00:35:00] daughter. And fortunately she didn't have any issues with church or any, anybody abusing her. But I certainly did not, guide her in the right way in that sense because I just, like I said, I just assumed that I was the only one that this would ever have happened to. Well, I think, I hear a lot in the church that they don't teach sex ed because they don't want the kids to go out and have sex. Mm-hmm. And so a lot of these kids are like ignorant as to, what is healthy and what is not proper, yeah. We need to teach 'em that our bodies or are going to respond. They were built that way. God intended us to have feelings. You know, when we are around the opposite sex, that's normal. Mm-hmm. So we need to make sure kids understand. But there are barriers and there are boundaries that need to be taken. But you're absolutely right when we don't talk at it, then we figure it out on their own. And we could, we can all imagine when you're leaving teenagers to [00:36:00] their own devices to figure out things. That's probably not gonna lead in a good spot. No, we have the internet now, which when we, right. When you and I were younger, we didn't have the internet. We didn't have cell phones. No. If you wanted a Playboy magazine, you had to go to that kind of a neighborhood to get something. Yes. You know? Yes. It was a lot more difficult. Yes, absolutely. But too many parents are embarrassed to talk to their children about sex and, you know, everybody listening needs to listen. You need to find a way to talk to them about these things. And one of the techniques that I use with my daughter, just in talking about sex in general, kids don't want to hear their mom and dad talk to 'em about this. So what I did would say, I read a magazine article about this girl who did such and such so that I put it off on something else that's, a non-entity of a person. And I'll say, or Have you ever heard of this? And of course I know she's got a little embarrassed, but I, it opened the dialogue without me coming [00:37:00] out and saying, have you heard of oral sex? Instead, I would talk to her and say, I heard this about this. This is what kids are doing, blah, blah, blah. So you kind of have to find techniques and ways to sneak around it sometimes, but you absolutely need to talk to, because they know it's out there and they're going to experiment. That's just part of being a teenager. Yeah, my parents chickened out. They just gave me a book to read. Same, probably the same book. I got, I forget what it was called. Where did I come from? Or something. It was a cartoon book. Mm-hmm. And I'm grateful for that. And, they just, after I finished the book, do you have any questions? Yeah, yeah. I had a lot of, older people that were friends and I would actually go to my older. Senior citizen friends and ask them questions rather than ask my parents. Right? Yeah, yeah. It's more comfortable that way for sure. Like I said, it's not the topic that we like to talk to with our kids and our kids don't wanna hear it, but being uncomfortable is not an excuse not to do that. And in school you get [00:38:00] the basics of the mechanics of it, but then that ends, that's all you get there as well. And that's not as helpful either. Yeah. The sixth grade menstrual cycle, health class. Yeah, exactly. That's it. They separate the girls and the boys. Yeah. We were all really embarrassed and Yes, yes. Yeah, exactly. Great information. So let's, circle around back to, okay, you've been hiding this secret forever. Mm-hmm. And nobody knows about your past. And then one day you got triggered. So what happened that day? Well, that's the first chapter of my book, and that is one day I was driving to a golf tournament in Tennessee. We live in Cincinnati. I was driving, my daughter was in college. She was playing in a golf tournament. I was driving down there and I was about halfway when I saw an exit sign for the town of Kingsport, Tennessee. And that is the. Town to which my [00:39:00] abuser was sent after he left our church, and it just sent me over the edge. Mm-hmm. All of a sudden I'm thinking, I'm in the town where he lives. Am I close to his house? Am I close to the church where he's now a minister? I mean, even though it'd been 27 years, I thought he was probably still there. I didn't know, but that's what my mind was telling me. I, all of a sudden I felt his presence in the car. I, I could smell him. I could hear him. Oh. I was, it was unbelievable to me what was happening to me. I didn't even know what was happening. I pulled to the side of the road Oh, good. And I sobbed. Yeah. I sobbed for about 20 minutes and I was just trying to figure out what was happening because anytime I had trigger factors before I could manage them, I could control them. I kind of let them happen and then I push 'em back down. Mm-hmm. This one wasn't going back down and I was a mess. I was just an absolute mess. I was able to get through the weekend. I drove back home and all I could think about was, what am I gonna do? What am I gonna do? [00:40:00] I wanted to stop thinking about him and I couldn't. I spent the next two weeks, really in anxiety. I, my husband would leave for work and I would just walk around the house, wring my hands, trying to figure out why I was feeling the way I was feeling. What was I gonna do with these feelings till at one point I finally decided I was gonna tell my best friend, and I was absolutely petrified to tell her because for the first time in 27 years, I was going to utter the words. I was sexually abused by my youth pastor. And I remember thinking, he's gonna find out and I'm gonna get in trouble. I just, I was 49 years old and I'm still afraid of this man. But I did tell her, it was, it took me a long time to, to get the words out, but I did, she was very supportive. She was very kind. She was patient as she waited for me to tell her. And so that started my journey of healing just by telling that first person. I then told two or three other of my close friends, so the four of us spent [00:41:00] many days and many hours on the screened in porch of one of my friends just letting me talk. Mm-hmm. And being able to express what had happened to me. I wasn't ready to tell all of the story. I mean, there's parts in the book that I won't go into here because they're pretty mm-hmm. Embarrassing and some things that I did. So I wasn't ready to tell them everything, but I told them enough that it helped me start to release what had been done to me. And so that was the first thing that I did, I think. And then the next thing I did, which was so valuable, and I encouraged victims to do it as well, I just read everything I could on clergy abuse or sexual abuse in itself. So I began to learn the terms of grooming, manipulation, gaslighting, and then I could see how he methodically used each one of those things on me to get me to do the things he got me to do, and to stay in that relationship for those five years. And that was huge for me. So [00:42:00] it was, for the first time as I began reading, I understood that I had been abused. Now, it still took me a while to admit that I really was sexually abused because I didn't want that label. I didn't wanna be an abuse victim. And there was a part of me. We all wanna be loved. And so there was still a part of me that I wanted to think that there was some part of him that cared about me, that this wasn't just purely about sex and that he wasn't just using me for his own gratification. And I had to get past that. I had to finally come to terms with, no, this man didn't do the no one who loves you, would do the things he did and ask the things he did of me. So that took me a while, to finally admit, okay, this was an abusive relationship. So I told someone, educating myself, and then I had to learn to forgive myself. I had to let, I had to let go of the guilt [00:43:00] and shame because any guilt and shame belongs squarely on him. This was a man that I should have been able to trust. It was in a place that should have been the safest place on earth for me. And he took advantage of a vulnerable teenager who had, I didn't have a major crisis in my life, but he knew my home life was an upheaval at times. He knew that I didn't see my dad very much. So he used that to against me. And I had to forgive myself for being who I was at the time and being able to respond the way I did for the coping skills I had at the time. Sure. You can look back. I, and I think, why didn't I say this? Why didn't I do that? But I couldn't because of, of the re of the relationship he had created between us. Mm-hmm. I had lost all power. He was in complete control of this relationship, so I had to forgive myself and that wasn't easy either. Then, and I don't know that this is something all victims should do, but I just felt this need [00:44:00] that I needed to confront him. I just felt like I couldn't move past this unless I was able to face him. Now, I had no contact with him for 27 years. I didn't even know if he was still alive, but I hired a private investigator and he found him ministering in a church in Alabama. And so I had my investigator contact him and we set up a time and a meeting that we would meet. And I took my husband, I took my friend who was a counselor and another friend who was at the church at the time. Um, I wanted her at this point. You told your husband at this point, I'm sorry. Yes, that's correct. I, it was probably three months after I told my friends, that I said to him I would like to meet him in his office and talked to him about something and. I was terrified. I don't know how else to say it. I just was so afraid. Not that I needed to be, but I was. And I probably sat there for almost, [00:45:00] I would say, 40 minutes and just cried. I was able to finally get out. I'm okay, the kids are okay, and then I started crying again. He couldn't have been any more supportive, more loving. I remember looking at his face and I said I was sexually abused by my youth pastor, and he didn't. His expression didn't change, and then I said. I was their babysitter and his face just dropped. And for the first time, I could see the pain I was feeling was reflected in his face. It was, I almost wanted to hug him to say, I'm sorry. 'cause I could see how much it hurt him to know that this had been done to me, especially as a baby. I mean, the picture became complete for him once I said that. And so he was very supportive. I think he was worried about me confronting this man, for a couple reasons. But one, I think he was worried that I would be disappointed in his reaction, and that I would be expecting too much of this [00:46:00] person to understand what he did to me and show any kind of remorse, and that I, it would hurt me even more. And one of my fears was that, I was afraid he wouldn't meet me. I was afraid that he was gonna say, no, I'm not gonna meet with you. And my husband said, oh, he's gonna meet with you all right? Because if he doesn't meet with you, you just tell him. Call the church secretary. We'll call every elder. We're gonna, he, somebody's gonna hear your story if he doesn't want to hear it. So he did agree to meet with me. I went down to Alabama and the meeting took place and I said the things that I wanted to say to him. I wanted him to get what he did to me. But he didn't, he never could understand the damage. It was almost as if, okay, I shouldn't have done it and I'm sorry I did it. Okay, now what do you want? It was, get away. You bother me? Yes. And his greatest fear as most narcissist, and I believe he was, narcissistic, but his greatest fear was that I was going to demand that he be removed from the ministry. I mean, that's what he [00:47:00] was most concerned about, how this was going to impact him. And he should have been out of the ministry. So I went to his. Boss. I was told this, and something happened 27 years ago. He, we think he's safe. We're not worried, in spite of the fact that during the meeting he had admitted that there had been multiple occurrences of sexual misconduct throughout his ministry. Not all teenagers, some were most were probably women. And then he said he had gone to therapy because he had been identified as a sexual addict. And I kept thinking, who, what? What world, what world? Does this make sense that a man who has been identified by a psychologist as a sex addict belongs in the ministry? Nope. But here was this church. So I sent a letter to his 11 elders thinking, okay, somebody in this eldership is gonna see this. Is I something's wrong here. Not one responded totally [00:48:00] ignored me. 11 elders totally ignored me. Wow. No worries. So then, I decided to go to his denominational leaders, which were in Indianapolis. And there again, while they were sympathetic to my story and apologize that it happened, they said, we're an independent church. Our churches hire and fire their own ministers. We have no control and if they choose to keep this man, we can do nothing about it. And so what, I was shut down and basically I had no place else to go. I had pretty much. Done everything I could do. And it wasn't my place in the man that he be removed. I expected the church to be, the church was to do the right thing. Exactly. I assumed so naively that once they heard my story and once they understood the background of this man, surely someone would say, this isn't right. But again, keep in mind he's very charismatic. He brings in [00:49:00] people, he brings in money. And to be fair, and probably I'm being a little too gracious, these men are very good at manipulating not only the victim but the congregation as well. They're very good at getting control of the congregation so that they find themselves following this man no matter what he would do. Yeah. And that's basically what happened. There was going to be, I got a four page letter from his boss telling me that, know, I'm going to. Ruin this church if I continue on this path and that I'm going to feel all this guilt because I'm gonna be responsible for the damage that I will do to pe people's spiritual lives. I mean that, it was an incredible, I put the letter in the book, I, because it is so incredibly, hard to believe that someone write that to a victim of abuse. Just So that was What year did that happen? 2004. Okay. So we did have. We did have the internet. Oh, yes. And this was after the Catholic, [00:50:00] church had their, exposure of sexual abuse within their church. So yes, this was, it was out there for sure. This wasn't something that you would think, oh, I can't believe this happened. And again, he had admitted to these past instances. I mean, this wasn't someone who was saying, oh, I don't know what she's talking about. Or, oh, this is the only time it ever happened. He had been in therapy because he was a sexual addict, So he wasn't registered as a sex offender? I guess not. And in my case, at the time of the abuse, the age of consent was 16. So I had no legal recourse because of I was either legally age of consent. Now that has been changed in Ohio. It's now 18. It's now 18, but many states it's still 16. There are several states where the age of consent is 16. Now, the interesting about that is. His contact sexual contact with me was not considered a crime. However, if he had been my high school teacher, it would've been a crime. What, so pastors I know [00:51:00] does not make sense. It does not make a leg of sense. No, it does not. So it, they don't consider him a teacher. They don't cons, they don't, they considered an affair. A mutual. Relationship if he'd been my teacher, that's a different story. So yeah, I had no legal recourse. And that was frustrating. But I couldn't change that. So it was what it was. I just had to accept that he, yes, he belonged in jail. Yes, there's no doubt and should be registered as a sex offender, but I'm not so sure that even if he's registered as a sex offender, these people in Alabama and wherever he is now, would. Even take that as a concern. Well, you know, the millennials now, they'll just, they just post stuff on Facebook and Twitter and call the evening news and they have, yes. News people at their doorstep, right. Ready to mm-hmm. Track this guy's name through the mud. Mm-hmm. But you didn't choose to do that, I guess. No, you know, I'm very careful about naming him in the sense that, part of my story is that I [00:52:00] reconnected with his wife. She actually divorced him after they moved, because again, he committed sexual misconduct. She was 20, I think, at the time, so it wasn't a minor, but that's beside the point. This is a man in a position that, a professional who does not cross boundaries like that. So, to no one surprise, he committed sexual misconduct the third time, so she divorced him. And part of, I guess letting go of some of the guilt that I felt, I wanted to. Connect with her to at least tell her, not that I was responsible for what happened, but how very sorry I was for her pain and suffering as well because she was part of the youth group. I mean, she was there at the church all the time. We sang in the choir together. So it was like I had a relationship with her. Oh wow. To some extent. And of course when, we were found, when he was found out by the elders, she was upset and she of course, didn't wanna have anything to do with me, which is understandable. So I actually think I [00:53:00] also wanted to give her the opportunity to say whatever she felt she needed to say to me if she wanted to. I mean, I didn't know what she was gonna say or react. I thought maybe she'd hang up on me. I didn't know. So I called her one day. My investigator found her phone number and gave it to me, and she couldn't have been any more gracious. I, she never blamed me. She understood as she, as the years went on, what this really was just like I did. She's remarried. She's has a wonderful husband now. And so I visited her several times. We keep in contact. And so part of my not wanting to expose him too much is that it would be hurtful to her. And he does have children. Now. I know that, well, whatever consequences are as a result of this are all on him, but I don't feel the need to add to that. That's not my purpose in speaking out. And so, mm-hmm. I've gone to his church leaders, I've done everything I can to get him removed from the ministry. And nothing, it's just [00:54:00] he's still, I don't know that he's still a pastor, but he still remains in good standing within that denomination to this day. Yeah. I mean, sometimes we have to just let God. Right. Dish out the justice. It may not be in our timeline, it may not be the way that we think it should happen, but Right. He's not gonna get away with this. No. And again, I did my part. Yes. So my conscience is clear and I am able to say I did what I could do and whether or not they removed him, I certainly hope that I maybe put some doubt in some of their minds and maybe questioned their motives in keeping this man. I don't know. But, I feel I did what I could do and I feel good about that. I feel good about that. Absolutely, you should. And what I'm really interested in is, you're trying to keep this stuff from happening to other people, so, I mean, what can we do to prevent some of this stuff? Well, it's [00:55:00] difficult again, because these men are among us as wolves in sheep's clothing, and so they're difficult to spot. But a couple things. I think the first thing I would tell people is if something doesn't seem right. Keep your antenna up. Don't just ignore it or just don't think, oh, well that can't be true because he's the pastor. Mm-hmm. If it's behavior that you wouldn't accept in someone else, or it's something that you would question in someone else, then question it in the pastor or the choir director, whoever it is. Don't be blinded by the person. The persona that they're presenting to you. So that's the first thing I would say is keep your antenna up. The other thing is we, and we're churches, I think are doing better about this, but you've got to have policies in place that say, no, you're not taking a 16-year-old girl on your hospital visit with you. Yes. That's, that's not normal. That's not right. What is she doing going on a hospital visit with you in a car? And of course now we have the texting [00:56:00] and there should be absolutely no texting between a pastor, a youth minister, and anyone in the congregation. And that includes, no, don't forget the meeting for the church luncheon. No, there should be no texting because you, it's too hidden and it's too easily moved to the next step. And that's how it starts. You know, all of the abuse when it's someone you know, it always starts with small things and subtle things. It doesn't, innocent things. Innocent things that, yeah, that, that are innocent. But so that's why, so no texting. Yeah. So put in the policy, those places of, when you take a 10-year-old child to the bathroom, you make sure there's another adult with you. Absolutely. That's for your safety as well as for the child's safety. Mm-hmm. So I, I think we need to be aware. And then I would also say watch for the vulnerable in your, among your church or your group. Watch for the kid that's got issues at home and is looking for a father figure. Be aware that they're going to be more susceptible to someone who's a predator and pay [00:57:00] attention to their cues and kind of keep in touch with them as well in a sense of asking questions and how they're doing and be the kind of a person that they might feel comfortable coming to if something were to happen to them because they're the ones that are gonna be most vulnerable, to a predator. So that's kind of, an overview of what. Maybe a help to try and stop and prevent some of this. Yes, I like lots of video cameras. They're cheap now. You can put a camera, you can hide cameras all over the church facility and Yes. And I think too, talking to this about this issue to the congregation before anything happens, maybe having a person in your congregation who is the go-to person on this topic, who, who's researched what all these grooming and manipulation is so that they are even more equipped to, to notice the signs. So you have a person who's kind of in charge of that topic and then address it to the congregation once a year and say, here's our policy and here's what we expect of our pastors and here's what we would hope you would [00:58:00] do if you notice something. So it just brings it out so that people feel like if there is something that they know is going on or something's wrong, they feel comfortable going to someone about it. Those are all really great tips for leaders and, church members. So what, what if I am listening and I am being subjected to some of this stuff, what should I do? Well, what you need to do and what is the hardest thing to do is to tell someone. Yeah. And it's hard to do because when you're in an abusive relationship, you are being controlled by your abuser. And the narrative is what he is directing. And so he's going to tell you, look, you can tell anybody you want. They're not gonna believe you. And he tells you that over and over again. He's also going to tell you that you are going to be in trouble if you tell anyone. And then there's that problem of you sort [00:59:00] of care about this person. Here's someone that has been helping you, who's been your mentor, and you don't wanna get him in trouble. So with all those dynamics involved, it's very difficult for victims to come forward. But I am telling you, you don't wanna wait the 27 years that I did no. And live with this guilt and the shame and the angst and the anxiety. First of all, it's not worth it. You're not doing anyone any favors, especially yourself, because there is help out there. But they can only help you if you're able to be able to tell someone. And believe me, I understand how difficult that is. It's not easy. Mm-hmm. But I would hope that I hearing my story and others that you will understand that there is help out there and you need to tell someone. 'cause it won't end until you tell someone. And if you need to, you go to someone that you trust. And if you need to, you go outside the church. Yes. You tell someone you know is going to listen to you. [01:00:00] Hey, I tell my listeners, you can call me anytime mm-hmm. And email me and I'm sure you'd say the same thing. Exactly. Reach out to Sandy if mm-hmm. You need somebody to talk to. Mm-hmm. Or you don't know what is the next step I need to take here? Right. It is scary to make First step. It's very scary. Very scary. Absolutely. So then there's the rest of us, those that have not experienced clergy abuse, maybe we're members in the church, maybe we're friends or family. What are some helpful things for us to do to support a victim? Helpful things to say, maybe there's things we shouldn't say, well, that's a yes. First, I would say anytime you're aware of a victim of clergy abuse or anybody who's been abused, whether it's clergy or not, reiterate to that victim that it was not their fault and that there was nothing they could have done, should have done that would've prevented this. And by doing that, you are [01:01:00] telling that person they're free to speak to you. And victims need to hear it over and over again because we do blame ourselves. Children as young as five will blame themselves because they allowed someone to touch them 'cause mommy said not to. And the that guilt in that shame that victims carry, it's difficult to let go of it. So to hear someone say to us, it's not your fault is so freeing. So that's the first thing. The second thing I would say is. Let them know that you will listen to them without judging them, and you will hear their story without being shocked that you are able to say, tell me everything you need to tell me, or Tell me as little as you wanna tell me. Give them a comfort place to go to talk. And then I would say, and this is difficult for people who have spiritual lives or who are part of the church, be very much aware that things such as prayer and Bible reading and [01:02:00] scripture can be very triggering for those who've been abused in the church. Mm-hmm. So things that you would find comforting like prayer. Can be a very major trigger factor for victims. And so instead of saying to a victim, I'll pray for you, or Can I pray with you? The best thing you could say would be to phrase it in such a way as to say, I understand because of what you've been through, prayer can be difficult. And so I would like to pray for you, but I would completely understand if you don't want to pray or you won't, don't even want me to pray for you. And so you've opened up the door to say to this person, wow, I don't have to feel guilty because I can't pray. You know, when we've grown up in the church and we've been told how wonderful church and prayer and all those things are, we still carry that guilt too because we're no longer connected to God. So to have a person on the outside. Recognize that these can be trigger factors is again, a gift. It's a [01:03:00] gift. So those things I think would be the most helpful when dealing with a person of clergy abuse. And give them time. Don't push forgiveness. Don't push trying to get them back into church. 'cause some victims will never be able to go back to church if you let them find their own pace of time and you do it without judging them. And I know that's kind of hard sometimes for Christians and people in the church because we love the church and we find it to be such a wonderful place and we want this person back in the church. Yes. But it, it may not be the best place at that point for that victim. Such valuable advice. I That is awesome. And again, back to like, when you're talking about the sex education, open up the dialogue, you know? Yeah. Bring it up. Bring it up before they bring it up. Again, I read in the newspaper that this girl was molested by, a gym teacher. You know that, that ha I know that happens. And then let 'em know that if. It is, like you said, allowing that comfort to be able to [01:04:00] talk to someone. I think for me it was important to give my side of the story. No one had a clue that he was emotionally and verbally and physically abusive to me. They saw this as a little love affair and that we had this, magic little love affair. Evil temptress. Yes, exactly. And so I wanted them to know the full story. That was important for my healing too. And they did that. And, they welcomed me back to the church. I went back, I've been back a couple times for, a youth group reunion that we had. So, and that was difficult. But again, I thought that was necessary for me to move forward. I had to let go of my past. I had to figure out, not to forget it, but how was I going to incorpo

James Seltzer attempted a table jump at the Phans of Philly tailgate yesterday — and the video quickly went viral around WIP. The WIP Afternoon Show reacts and breaks it all down.

Send us a textThe wonderful Chanté Joseph, writer of the viral British Vogue piece, ‘Is Having A Boyfriend Embarrassing Now?' is back for Part 2 of our conversation. If you haven't already listened to Part 1, I highly recommend you go and do that first, and you're then going to want to come back and listen to this part, too!In this second half of our conversation, Chanté talks about how she's started being totally upfront with men she's dating, rather than holding back for fear of losing someone; she talks about a book called The Tragedy of Heterosexuality by Jane Ward, which has really transformed the way that Chanté thinks about relationships and dating; we also talk about polyamory and non-monogamy, the question of whether human beings are even built for long-term relationship, as well as 'Strangers In The City', an event series that Chanté started with her best friend which brings solo people together. 02:38 The Tragedy of Heterosexuality02:58 Polyamory and Non-Monogamy06:04 Emotional Dominance in Relationships11:39 Questioning Long-Term Relationships19:05 The Fear of Being Alone21:20 Cultural Perspectives on Singledom22:59 The Irony of Singledom for Women23:56 Scott Galloway and the Masculinity Crisis24:56 Encouraging Men to Step Up27:07 The Role of Community in Relationships29:22 Reflections on Societal Pressures34:19 Chanté's Personal Journey and Career Focus36:52 Strangers in the City: Chanté's Event SeriesRead Chanté's Vogue piece: https://www.vogue.co.uk/article/is-having-a-boyfriend-embarrassing-nowFollow her on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chantayyjayy/?hl=enBook a 'Strangers In The City' event: https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/o/strangers-in-the-city-81942438803Follow Strangers In The City on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strangersinthecityevents/?hl=en Support the showBuy my book, SHINY HAPPY SINGLES (UK) / THRIVE SOLO (US & Canada) at: https://www.lucymeggeson.com/book Join my membership community for single women, Thrive Solo: https://www.lucymeggeson.com/thrivesolo Download my FREE PDF 'Top 10 Comebacks for the MostAnnoying Questions Single Women Get Asked' Go to: https://www.lucymeggeson.com/comebacks Check out my YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@thrivesolowithlucymeggeson Join my private Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1870817913309222/?ref=share Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thrivesolowithlucymeggeson/ Email me: lucy@lucymeggeson.com And thank you so much for listening!

This week we talk about Joe Hendry's embarrassing Christmas segment on SmackDown, Cody Rhodes & Drew McIntyre facing off, Roxanne vs Bayley and we answer your emails!Go AD-FREE at Patreon.com/WWEPodcastBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/the-wwe-podcast--2187791/support.

(0:00) Jokic the ‘best player without multiple rings', Have the Spurs arrived? (28:56) Broncos beat Chiefs in EMBARRASSING win, Will Travis Kelce retire? (41:48) Has the Lions' Super Bowl window closed?  (47:38) Upset Alert and Nick's Picks (01:10:29) What grade will Brou give the Cowboys after they beat the Commanders? (01:23:26) Lamar Jackson doubtful for game vs. Packers (01:30:14) Parkins' Picks, Will Caleb Williams outplay Brock Purdy? (01:52:32) Frenemies (02:03:14) Who Ya Got: Week 17 (02:10:54) Steelers concerned without DK Metcalf? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Merry Christmas! EZ back Monday, December, 29.Segments include:*Pooh Bear joins the show to talk about EZ getting hit on, and his broken yogurt cannon.*Political talk. EZ tells you what's up.*Trump shooter had been planning his attack for months.*More fall out from JC's temper tantrum.*EZ goes HAM on Jack White.*Detroit dude free after 34 years in prison for a murder he didn't commit.*Man beats up woman in the Olympics.*EZ delves further into the Trump clip from earlier today. It seems Trump may have come out of that looking better than originally thought.*Kids silly T shirt makes baseball announcer look stupid.*Olympic basketball player gets some special medical attention!*Embarrassing moment for Olympic trainer.*DJ Khalid's Samaritan-like ice cream supply*NFL weirdo Daniel Jones incapable of being silly.Our Sponsors:* Check out Secret Nature and use my code ZANE for a great deal: https://secretnature.comSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/the-eric-zane-show-podcast/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

The NFL had a complete whiff yesterday, while the NBA crushed it. A winning QB that threw for 51 yards?? Embarrassing! Has Dan Campbell been exposed as a mediocre head coach? Why the Broncos will NOT win the Super Bowl. Drama on and off the court for KAT. And why JJ Redick is asking to be fired from the Lakers. All that, and more, on today's episode of The Craig Carton Show!  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Show Open, Replay of GBAG of the Day Champ, Zach Wolchuk ranks Top 10 Worst Christmas Gifts, and Eric Chiofalo has a College Football Day Party.

There will be a show tomorrow, NO shows Wed-Fri! The case between the family of Tyler Skaggs and the Los Angeles Angels is over. A settlement was reached while the jury was deliberating. Let's discuss why a settlement was reached and what this means for the Angels. (13:00) Anthony Joshua crushed Jake Paul. Paul should never have been in the ring. The fight was an embarrassment. Paul is a marketing genius, but this was just bad. (18:50) The RSN model collapse is at the door. Let me explain what is happening and the future of the local broadcasts across sports. (32:00) WNBA could face a lockout. The WNBPA could be striking. (40:00) Scott Boras is funny. That's it. (48:00) Padres bring back Michael King. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

There will be a show tomorrow, NO shows Wed-Fri! The case between the family of Tyler Skaggs and the Los Angeles Angels is over. A settlement was reached while the jury was deliberating. Let's discuss why a settlement was reached and what this means for the Angels. (13:00) Anthony Joshua crushed Jake Paul. Paul should never have been in the ring. The fight was an embarrassment. Paul is a marketing genius, but this was just bad. (18:50) The RSN model collapse is at the door. Let me explain what is happening and the future of the local broadcasts across sports. (32:00) WNBA could face a lockout. The WNBPA could be striking. (40:00) Scott Boras is funny. That's it. (48:00) Padres bring back Michael King. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Support our sponsor this week by using the link below for the exclusive Solomonster offer!MINT MOBILE ▶ Get your 3-month UNLIMITED wireless plan for just 15 bucks a month at http://www.mintmobile.com/solomonster right now!John Cena sat down with Cody Rhodes for his first interview post-retirement and had some WILD responses to his questions.  I'll tell you what those were and give my thoughts on Bleacher Report giving an "F" grade to his retirement tour.  Also, the ACCIDENTAL title change on NXT... MVP just cannot stop talking about Paul Levesque... where things stand with the Continental Classic and WORLDS END predictions... Wrestle Kingdom 20 preview and predictions, and how Tanahashi's final year stacks up with Cena's... 2025 YEAR IN REVIEW... plus my 2025 YEAR END AWARDS including Promotion of the Year, how they compare to the list released this week by Sports Illustrated and why all the drama around it this week is utterly embarrassing.***Follow Solomonster on X (formerly Twitter) for news and opinion:http://x.com/solomonsterSubscribe to the Solomonster Sounds Off on YouTube:https://www.youtube.com/user/TheSolomonster?sub_confirmation=1Become a Solomonster Sounds Off Channel Member:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC9jcg7mk93fGNqWPMfl_Aig/join

What's it like to date a man? Ask pop stars or your friends, and you might hear it's a struggle.From Sabrina Carpenter to Summer Walker, some of the biggest female artists on the charts today…are absolutely through with men. It's a sentiment that has a name: heteropessimism. Coined in 2019 by the writer Asa Seresin, the term encapsulates the embarrassment, disaffection and fatigue that comes from being heterosexual. “Men are trash” music that reflects these feelings isn't new, but NPR Music editor Hazel Cills says it's making a comeback. So what makes this time different? And what can we learn from this moment's heteropessimism about the realities of dating men today?Support Public Media. Join NPR Plus.Follow Brittany Luse on Instagram: @bmluseFor handpicked podcast recommendations every week, subscribe to NPR's Pod Club newsletter at npr.org/podclub.Learn more about sponsor message choices: podcastchoices.com/adchoicesNPR Privacy Policy

Grandson joins Ralph Sutton and Aaron berg and they discuss Ralph's embarrassing story, growing up in Toronto, Grandson teaching himself guitar, the experience of attending one of his live shows, why he decided on the name Grandson, his decision to go independent, an in-studio live performance of Brain Rot and God Is An Animal, Grandson's most embarrassing moment on stage, jumping into the hot tub at Shiprocked and so much more!(Air Date: December 13th, 2025)Support our sponsors!YoKratom.com - Check out Yo Kratom (the home of the $60 kilo) for all your kratom needs!To advertise your product or service on GaS Digital podcasts please go to TheADSide.com and click on "Advertisers" for more information!You can watch The SDR Show LIVE for FREE every Wednesday and Saturday at 9pm ET at GaSDigitalNetwork.com/LIVEOnce you're there you can sign up at GaSDigitalNetwork.com with promo code: SDR for discount on your subscription which will give you access to every SDR show ever recorded! On top of that you'll also have the same access to ALL the shows that GaS Digital Network has to offer!Follow the whole show on social media!GrandsonInstagram: https://instagram.com/GrandsonRalph SuttonTwitter: https://twitter.com/iamralphsuttonInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/iamralphsutton/Aaron BergTwitter: https://twitter.com/aaronbergcomedyInstagram: https://instagram.com/aaronbergcomedyShannon LeeTwitter: https://twitter.com/IMShannonLeeInstagram: https://instagram.com/ShannonLee6982The SDR ShowTwitter: https://twitter.com/theSDRshowSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Thu, 18 Dec 2025 22:45:00 GMT http://relay.fm/connected/583 http://relay.fm/connected/583 The 2025 Annies 583 Federico Viticci, Stephen Hackett, and Myke Hurley The year is coming to an end, and to celebrate, Federico, Stephen, and Myke score each month with the only unit of measurement that matters: the Ticci Scale. The year is coming to an end, and to celebrate, Federico, Stephen, and Myke score each month with the only unit of measurement that matters: the Ticci Scale. clean 6789 Subtitle: We Swam Hundreds of MilesThe year is coming to an end, and to celebrate, Federico, Stephen, and Myke score each month with the only unit of measurement that matters: the Ticci Scale. This episode of Connected is sponsored by: Ecamm: Powerful live streaming platform for Mac. Get a free month with code connected. Squarespace: Save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code CONNECTED. Links and Show Notes: Get Connected Pro: Preshow, postshow, no ads. Submit Feedback Give the Gift of Relay The Ticci Scale Quokka - Wikipedia Opossum - Wikipedia Four Winners and Losers of Apple's 2025 - 512 Pixels Nintendo Switch 2 – First-look trailer - YouTube A New Look for 2025 and Beyond — Relay Why everyone is freaking out about DeepSeek | The Verge Apple Intelligence summaries might get warning labels. That's not enough. – Six Colors TikTok is partially back online in the US, but it's not back in the App Store yet | The Verge Trump signs order refusing to enforce TikTok ban for 75 days | The Verge This is the Samsung Galaxy S25 Edge | The Verge Tech billionaires Bezos and Zuckerberg attend Trump inauguration - BBC News Apple Enlists Company Veteran Kim Vorrath to Help Fix AI, Siri - Bloomberg UK government demands access to Apple users' encrypted data - BBC News Apple's Invites invites you to send invitations – Six Colors Netflix says its brief Apple TV app integration was a mistake | The Verge Sophia Hurley. Born Feb 22, 2025 – Instagram Apple will spend more than $500 billion in the U.S. over the next four years - Apple Some first thoughts about the iPhone 16e – Six Colors Apple buys Intel's modem business for $1B – here's why – Six Colors Daring Fireball: Apple Is Delaying the ‘More Personalized Siri' Apple Intelligence Features Daring Fireball: Something Is Rotten in the State of Cupertino New Mac Studio spans the generations with M4 Max, M3 Ultra chips – Six Colors Apple did what NVIDIA wouldn't - YouTubeA look at chaining Mac Studios together for running AI models. M4 MacBook Air review: Am I blue? – Six Colors Apple updates iPad Air and iPad, revamps Magic Keyboard for iPad Air – Six Colors Apple's Siri Chief Calls AI Delays Ugly and Embarrassing, Promises Fixes - Bloomberg Apple Vision Pro Chief Mike Rockwell Named Siri Head; Giannandrea Keeps AI Role - Bloomberg EU Fines Apple €500 Million for Digital Markets Act Violations - MacStories Updates for apps in the European Union - Latest News - Apple Developer Trade, Tariffs, and Tech – Stratechery by Ben Thompson A judge just blew up Apple's control of the App Store | The Verge Apple files appeal to wrest back control of its App Store | The Verge Apple updates App Store Guidelines to allow links to external payments - 9to5Mac “Apple is fully capable of resolving this issue without further briefing or a hearing.” | The Verge Apple's Eddy Cue: ‘You may not need an iPhone 10 years from now' | The Verge Apple rolls out rebranded “CarPlay Ultra” three years after its unveiling – Six Colors A letter from Sam & Jony | OpenAI OpenAI to Buy Apple Veteran Jony Ive's AI Device Startup in $6.5 Billion Deal - Bloomberg Connected #553: We Have Jony Ive at Home - Relay From the Creators of Shortcuts, Sky Extends AI Integration and Automation to Your Entire Mac - MacStories WWDC25 - Apple Developer Interview: Craig Federighi Opens Up About iPadOS, Its Multitasking Journey, and the iPad's Essence - MacStories WWDC25: macOS Tahoe Breaks Decades of Finder History - 512 Pixels macOS Tahoe Beta 2 Fixes the Finder Icon - 512 Pixels Apple Debates a Deal With Perplexity in Pursuit of AI Talent - Bloomberg New MacBook With A18 Pro Chip Spotted in Apple Code - MacRumors Box Office: 'F1' $144 Million Opening, Apple & Brad Pitt Record; 'M3GAN 2.0' Bombs 'F1' Overtakes 'Napoleon' as Apple's Highest-Grossing Film – Variety Apple announces chief operating officer transition - Apple Meta Hires Apple Top AI Models Executive - Bloomberg Apple expands U.S. supply chain with $500 million commitment - Apple Apple sues leaker Jon Prosser for stealing iOS secrets | The Verge Ted Lasso' Season 4 Cast Set As Production Begins: First Photo – Deadline iOS 26 beta 4 adds more ‘liquid' back to Liquid Glass design - 9to5Mac Apple shipped its 3 billionth iPhone | The Verge Apple increases U.S. commitment to $600 billion, announces ambitious program - Apple Apple made a 24k gold and glass statue for Donald Trump | The Verge Apple launching ‘redesigned Blood Oxygen feature' on Apple Watch in the U.S. today - 9to5Mac UK drops demand for backdoor into Apple encryption | The Verge September 2025 Event Archives - MacStories We Tried to Break the iPhone Air | Interview with Apple's Joz & John Ternus - YouTube iPhone Air Durability test -- I AM SHOCKED - YouTube Google and Apple's $20 billion search deal survives | The Verge Instagram Launches an iPad App - MacStories Relay for St. Jude 2025: $753,756 Raised - 512 Pixels $753,756 - The Enthusiast Apple's ICEblock capitulation is business as usual – Six Colors UK government resumes row with Apple by demanding access to British users' data | Data protection | The Guardian Immersive live NBA games coming to Vision Pro – Six Colors iPadOS 26.1 beta brings back Slide Over, adds microphone adjustments – Six Colors Apple Reorganization: Services Gets Health, Fitness; WatchOS to Craig Federighi - Bloomberg M5 MacBook Pro review: The ultimate computer? – Six Colors M5 iPad Pro Review: An AI and Gaming Upgrade for AI and Games That Aren't There Yet - MacStories M5 Vision Pro, Dual Knit Band, PSVR2 controller review: Apple's experiment continues – Six Colors Apple is the exclusive new broadcast partner for Formula 1® in the U.S. - Apple Jon Prosser says he's been in ‘active communication' with Apple over lawsuit | The Verge Apple Said to Cut iPhone Air Production Amid Underwhelming Sales - MacRumors iOS 26.1 Beta 4 Lets Users Control Liquid Glass Transparency with New Toggle - MacRumors This is just the beginning. - YouTube Daring Fireball: Apple TV's New Fanfare Building Apple TV's New Logo | TBWAMedia Arts Lab Major League Soccer is coming to Apple TV starting in 2026 - Apple Introducing iPhone Pocket: a beautiful way to wear and carry iPhone - Apple Apple hit with $634 million verdict in Apple Watch patent fight with Masimo - 9to5Mac Apple intensifies succession planning for CEO Tim Cook – FT Daring Fireball: Financial Times: 'Apple Intensifies Succession Planning for CEO Tim Cook' Google cracked Apple's AirDrop and is adding it to Pixel phones | The Verge Use Quick Share on your Android device - Android Help Apple might turn to Intel for its upcoming M-series chips, per report - 9to5Mac Apple Fitness+ expands to 28 new markets - Apple Apple's Top Designer Alan Dye Poached by Meta in Major Coup - Bloomberg John Giannandrea to retire from Apple - Apple Apple announces executive transitions - Apple Apple Chip Chief Tells Staff He's Not Leaving ‘Anytime Soon' - Bloomberg Apple announces changes to iOS in Japan - Apple Apple Music in ChatGPT – Viticci – Bluesky

Send us a textWe're coming full circle from our podcast on right-wing authoritarianism to talk about that viral Oklahoma student essay and why Christians rallying around bad arguments makes all Christians look terrible. Then Keith and I get vulnerable about how our faith has changed over the last few years—from realizing faith isn't just about beliefs, to understanding who Jesus actually called out (spoiler: not "the world"), to reframing the concept of sin as form of brokenness that God truly understands and has deep compassion for (as opposed to the angry God who is mad at us all the time). We'll also share some of the exciting things coming in 2026!JOIN OUR FUNDRAISING CAMPAIGN!Help us raise money to fund our research, our new podcast docuseries, and our translation projects! Give through the Good Fruit Faith Initiative (tax deductible within the United States) or join our Patreon!CHECK OUT THE RESOURCES MENTIONED:The Whole Story puberty courseThe Great Sex RescueTO SUPPORT US: Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our workAnd check out our Merch, or any of our courses!Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko FoundationJoin our email list!LINKS MENTIONED: Our podcast on Right Wing AuthoritarianismSupport the showJoin Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!Check out her books: The Great Sex Rescue She Deserves Better The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.