Hangin' Out with the Old Fellas

Would the last person to escape Easter '25 please turn out the lights! Yes viewers, it's death all around for the long weekend. Batman last week, the Pope this week! Looks like it doesn't pay to wear a silly cape! Will the Church pass on the profits? I bet you they don't!

Yes - it's Vale Val Kilmer. But he got 25 years he shouldn't have, so it's all good. Barry discovers Nurse Bukesham is a mutant. No hand-modelling contract for her. But on the bright side, with dexterity like that, it's so easy to fall in love.

The redactions have been unredacted. The documents have been documented. And what goes on in the back seat should stay in the back seat ... If ONLY! To be honest, having the radio on was very distracting. So were the windscreen wipers. Bloody weather. At least we'll always have Elon ...

Ep 67 - Mozart's Birthday and Other TraumaAfter 269 years, it's time to reset. So the Attricks reach into the soap opera kitbag and pull out a classic reset narrative. But Jerry's not taking it lying down. In ya dreams! I mean, seriously! Ella Fitzgerald, Johnny Mathis and Ray Stevens will be rolling in their graves!

In a feeble attempt to boost ratings, and against legal advice, Jerry makes an on-air confession - to everything! Shooting JFK. Faking the moon landing. The Napoleonic Wars. Cue the tell-all tome. Complete the medley. Split the light spectrum. Meh. A typical day really ...

After an enforced hiatus, Baz n Jez make a comeback. Plenty of headlines. Plenty of updates. Plenty of hangin' out. It might be summer romance season, but the arranged marriage to James Packer is OFF!

All the Attrick action from the 5 Rings Festival - packed into one Gold Gold Gold episode. All the thigh-strangling lycra you can poke a stick at. And with the Old Fellas' commentary, there's very little left to the imagination.

No faffing about, Hangers - chalk up a red letter day! Albo justifies his existence - and his out-of-control hairdressing costs. But we'll overlook it on this occasion. Qantas gets it wrong (again), but Elon gets it right. So, we can all sleep again. Meanwhile, Morty Geigercounter's pacemaker short circuits - and Jerry does Gerry! Liverpool FC will never be the same.

Denzel of Dubbo's ashes have a birthday. The hired assassin misses again! Underpants have a day out! Oh - and not to mention: Debbie's Boobs! Meanwhile, we await the return of the sausages. So, let's celebrate! You, me and the Sailor - over a glass of champagne!

Well!!! You never know what you'll find in ya Morning Motion - if you look close enough. A bloody great Cetacean! A true Whippomorphian! Barry questions its motives, but Jerry just accepts its presence. In fact - he feels it in his fingers, he feels it in his toes ...

Ep 62 - Is There Life After Paris? It's the veneration of today's Aussie athletes and the demise of yesterday's. No fear, Hangers! Barry and Jerry have all the highs, the lows and the in-betweens. Especially the in-betweens. Get your baggy pants on sports fans - it's silly dance time!

It's the Festival of the Five Rings - Spindly Pines style. Let's scull some steroid soup, grab a paddle and a pair of togs, then head off to Paris representing Aussie octogenarianism. Doing what octogenarians do best - whingeing, gettin' it wrong and falling asleep mid-senten ..........ce ... The situation is tailor made!

Yes - everyone's ducking bullets. Someone's dunking the wife. And Jerry's dodging the rain but not the pain, in a heart fluttering tribute to an entire continent.

Spindly Pines Governors decide the Attricks are redundant. So Barry and Jerry go into hiding. Yes, it's the podcast from the crypt, Hangers! Now if they can just find the can opener! Jerry has to play it cold - and amber. Break out the Pepper Potts!

It's not easy to be made redundant at Spindly Pines Nursing Home. But that's a good reason for the Attrick Brothers to give it a go. Along the way, there's a bit of Dicky Knee action. A bit of Apollo 8 inaction. ABBA get crowned - or something. And Australian cricket goes the wobbly. Man! I feel like a lie down!

This time it's: Ad Libitum Ad Infinitum. More Latin rhythms. More Lorem Ipsum with noise. The addendum to the compendium to the appendix. Jerry turns off his mind to commit utter sacrilege! He is now condemned to eternity in the Void.

This is: Ad Libitum Ad Nauseum! Jerry and Barry get in touch with their Latin rhythms. Lorem Ipsum - but with sound! There's National Gallery controversy. Ticketmaster controversy. And Corona Virus silliness ... again! It all takes it toll on the Aussie swim team. Again!

Once again the Old Fellas get painted in gold, 007-style. The Attricks recycle a Grammy or three, Mr Analovski gets named Contortionist of the Week, and Jerry's butt transfigurates into the 5th Dimension! Someone! Dettol!

It was the best of sportz. It was the worst of sportz. Talk about an age of wisdom! And then, there's the Attrick Brothers - Barry and Jerry. Yes Hangers! This is a rehash - days of Sportz Past! A bunch of Old Fella Sportz commentary! Spelt with a 'z' to avoid getting a copyright strike - from ourselves! Gold! Gold! Gold to Spindly PInes!

Yep! Jerry called it - someone drugged the soup! And what does Melbourne get in return? Jabba, Twiggy and their decadent entourage! I dunno - it's all just too low for zero!

Who'da thought 50 years could get past us?! Yes, it's a quick Attrick celebration of the 70s, whacky chemicals included. Then a quick Attrick celebration of all things marathoning. Followed by a lot of plunging and plummeting! But hey - that's life on the edge ... wooooooh! Watch-under!!!! (Just don't mention Sam Kerr ...)

Baz is back! Easter is back! VIP Airforce Jet travel is back! Even those Chinese Golden Waving Cats are back! And who knows why. Probably just because …

Barry's procedure went splendidly, but he's warned off microphones 'til the scarring ripens ... which'll be a while coz it's grey at the moment. Anyway, thanks for the cards and chocolates. I ate them all before I got them to Barry, so I'm not sure whether to tell him. What'dya think viewers? Let's take a vote - no more monkee'ing around!

So! Barry's orf! Having "the procedure" ... So here's some impromptu bits we prepared earlier. Mouth in gear before brain - guaranteed. Someone call the media!

Special effects! Special guests! Special specials! And that's just the introduction! It's all to celebrate the collapse of Western Civilisation. And just for the kiddies, Jerry guzzles down the most difficult song parody - EVER! Good Lord, that's moist!

It's happened again, viewers! Damned censorship board took one sample of Episode 50 and voted with a resounding, "Nyet!" As in, 'Not yet.' So it was Matron's turn to attack the original cassette tape with the safety scissors. And hey presto - there goes 3 minutes! Never to be found again.

The International Awards judges sent us an S.O.S asking for a 10 minute trailer, that describes what the Old Fellas podcast is all about.A few highlights. A general summary. Some good examples.In the end, we did this instead ...

The boys are back on the job. And the Christmas New Year break has left an untidy trail of headlines that need to be dealt with. So! Break the lock on the door of the sound booth, and let's get on with it - no matter what the Boss tells ya!

When the Attrick Brothers do it, they REALLY do it. But just what the hell, is "IT"? I dunno. Ask Stephen King. Or the Addams Family. Rest assured Matron & Librarian will ruin the Attrick reputation with these random snippets. So nothing's wasted. (Except Mavis, but that's a story for episode one ...)

Matron and the librarian have gone berserk! Enough said. But apart from that, they've stuck these random bits of tape together in a completely random order. Even announcement guy isn't safe! Keep out of reach of children.

The boys tend to forget their PG rating in the bits that end up on the floor. But you can't stop the librarian scooping up all the loose tapes and randomly sticking them back together. So here they are: "Bits off the Floor - 2023".

Yes! It's that time of year! The Spindly Pines Christmas outing. And to celebrate, Anastasia resigns! The laugh's on you Queensland. Ho! Ho! Ho! Who'd be a turkey at Christmas? Elton, Bernie & Madonna, apparently!

The bugs are swarming. The meds are spilling. The ‘rona is making a comeback! A World Tour no less! The band will never speak to each other again, and Boomers everywhere will demand Jerry apologize.

T'is the season, Hangers! The magpies are dive-bombing. The Spuds are attacking. Albo, Kim & Bill Gates are cuttin' loose. Nippon nervousness abounds. Jerry must make a major decision: the white dress, or the red? I dunno - ask Emily Bronte ...

From the highs of New York award success to the bottom of the Hawkesbury River! Ya gotta tell it like it is - even if it isn't! Yep, hangers and danglers - outa the subway the bullets rip ...

Sports Day! Awards night! And a Referendum thrown in just to ramp up the nerves. October 14 2023: proof that too much activity is never enough. Price includes one way ferry ride to King Arthur's resting place. Soothing ointment extra.

At last! An episode with everything! Vegan stuff! Olympic stuff! Prime Minister stuff! Plus baked beans thrown in. Just don't get any stuck on you ...

All through 3rd quarter 2023, we've been saving them up. Yes, there's time for celebration. There's time for regret. And there's time for bangin' around in the bins looking for those bits of tape that we left on the cutting room floor. Then it's time to splice them all together and give them a public airing. The rude bits. The scary bits. The borderline disgusting bits. The off-cuts ... Yeah - that bit!

Barry! Where the bloody hell did you find that? And what do you plan to do with it? Oh, don't stick it up there! Apologies viewers - there's no stopping him sometimes. And in an episode full of new revelations, we can reveal: Jerry loves Joan Jett, sans the boots apparently.

Brace! Brace! Brace!!! Bloody Albo's done us a mischief! I suppose we're better off than your average Qantas passenger. Speaking of getting cancelled, be careful who ya kiss! And if ya gunna flash - make it a Quarterflash! That's more than enough heart trouble for one day ...

When 'M' Fever takes over the nation, your favourite Old Fellas are NOT immune! it just comes down to which particular 'M' Fever they're gunna catch. No stress - Billy Slater will sort it out! And who knew those old 'Carry On' films could be this smooth.

Two Old Fellas in one room - there's bound to be those bits that get cut off and left on the floor. So we scooped up them bits 'n' stuck 'em together. A string of Old Fella Off-cuts - now with extra offness.

Mourning in the morning - nothing compares. But the old fellas know the perfect antidote - cake and sport. And of course, some deep shut-eye afterwards.

The boys stumble into the Australian Podcasting Awards night. It doesn't take long before they've maimed Hamish Blake, then found themselves up to the elbows in red wine and dentures. Tony Bennett provides the entertainment, despite recent news - seems he hasn't yet got the memo.

De-genderings ahoy! Sign this petition now! Sharpen your nib and scrawl your signature with an Old Fella. Jerry visits the grand-daughter and slops tomato sauce on everything. Now THERE'S an idea for an ad!

The end of an era leaves a bad taste in everyone's mouth. It's enough to make you want to invade Poland - or get lost at sea trying. Either way, the whole thing rubs Jerry the wrong way. How the bloody hell do you count whales anyway?!

Live and dining! The Old Fellas upturn the family vibe at the local Chinese. Talking too loud. Slopping the hot sauce. And as for the sweeteners!!! Jerry can't get enough! But he'll pay for it on the way home. So will everyone else on the bus! 

The tragic demise of one diva. The tragic rise of another. We all must take our place on the Great Mandela. Then we just wash up on the shore like a discarded novelty phone. Chill out pot-heads. Chill out.

It's a set up! It's a conspiracy! It's an expose! The Old Fellas have audio! And! Moving Pictures! You'll be sorry you looked.

Big Charley (aka Darth Windsor) goes to the Big House and gets himself a Big Hat, plus one for the missus. There's a lot of swearing - seems the crown sits uncomfortably. Well, that's Jerry's theory. Jenny Craig's had enough - so has Father Bob ... So they decide to go together. Next thing - Jerry claims he's like a virgin!!! Matron and the Queensland Police get involved and now ... It is ON!

Young people!!!! What is the matter with them? Whatever it is, Barry & Jerry can relate. Are they disillusioned by the false start that is ... the space race?! Jerry to the rescue, playing the anti-hero. If only he had her legs ...