Real Men Don't Wear Long Sleeves

In this episode we watch to see if Rory Lobb and the Bulldogs end up answering for their assaults on Mason Cox's cheekbones and the presence of the son of the most hated media personality in the Real Men team. Featuring your favourite segments of Hot Goss, Bone to Kicks, Checking in on our guys, as well as some new segments that may not be attempted in podcast format ever again.

Footy. Camping. Painting. Sinking. Yarning. Ranging off.

Opening round has us returning to season 2025 feeling like we've been downgraded from a Tropical Cyclone to a category one system. Sit down as we go through all our predictions for 2025, broadcasting wars, nepo babies, including a fair amount of a 6 month old's thoughts and feelings.

It's Round 8, the Real Men are back in AFL's unofficial rivalry round. We discuss the best and worst rivalries, nightmare blunt rotations and who from the Bulldogs team can be best attributed to historical Russian figures.

Sit back and listen to us watch the worst Friday night footy in our hoodies as we take on the important topics of Aussie hip hop, New Zealand AFL teams, and incredibly harrowing F**k, marry, kills.

This week, the Bulldogs take on the Suns in Ballarat, where we ponder who is leading the comeback of the goatee, discuss the financial impacts of the GWS cat rescue mission, and we also get to know our new friend Malcolm Mally Rosas.

The Real Men are back for Season 2024!!! It's been a while, and there's a lot of confusion around who the frick some of the Essendon players are. We look into the crystal ball to see what what this year holds for our beloved teams, as well as what Kate Middleton might be up to with her BBL.

Nobody likes you when you're 32.

There's a runsheet this week and it's time for banter.

What are the best tactics for pulling all-nighters at primary school sleepovers? What's the best food to at the footy and what the hell are they putting in those gourmet hotdogs? Find out all of that and more on this weeks episode of Real Men Don't Wear Long Sleeves.

Little treat for all real men who love their beats. To reiterate we are not affiliated with Telstra or Spotify in any way shape or from please support independent creators and if you are a powerful corporation please do not sue or issue cease and desists

In Round 13, the Bombers and their army of giant red heads defeat the insipid Blues as we talk adult men with freckles, the redemption of Toby Greene, and look forward to the looming spectre of a finals rivalry.

In Round 11, it's NAR vs WAL. As the Brayshaw brothers fight it out, we touch on incest threesome, wax figurines, why Caleb Serong will be the next Prime Minister, and which Australian animals would have the most success on the footy field.

In Round 10, we watch the Walyalup play Geelong, whilst putting our skills to the test of guessing AFL players from their Instagram captions. We also consider the best scoreboard formats in our time, and the best moustaches in the AFL.

In Round 8, we discuss the rights of the Tasmanian devil, find out what happened to the players from the long forgotten TV show 'The Recruit', and read a heart-warming story of a 5 year old that kicked 100 goals in a showdown.

In Round 7, it's Friday night footy in our hoodies and Erin faces her fears as we watch Port vs St Kilda. We discuss our grand plans if one of us was to step in as AFL CEO, and take a deep dive on Essendon's name origins whilst determining which of us would go to war.

In Round 6, the Dogs teach the Dockers a lesson out west, while we discuss the infamous 'Lobster Tears', cast a potential AFL version of Ready Steady Cook, and brainstorm possibilities for future Grand Final entertainment.

It's Gather Round baby. In Round 5, Carlton lose to Crows and prove that Erin curses every player she runs into as the Real Men are treated to some South Australian trivia history.

In Round 4, we're here for the hoo-ha as Collingwood take on Brisbane at the Gabba, and we discuss key characters of the game, dick pics, and how Gill McLachlan and Andrew Demetriou both got flushed away.

In Round 3, Hawthorn play North and we ask some serious questions, such as: Why does JHF get booed? Is Nick Daicos overrated? And most importantly, what contrarian opinions will it take for Rose to get booted off mid-episode?

In Round 2, Geelong and Carlton - featuring two of the great country bumpkins - battle it out in what proves to be an episode full of analysis on international recruits, Patrick Cripps' character authenticity, and some very poor predictions for the rest of the round.

We're back for season 2023! Some things change, some things stay the same. We hate North now, but West Coast are still shit. Join us to catch up on our vision for 2023, get to know West Coast's unfamiliar faces, and teach Cam Zurhaar a lesson about cyber bullying.

It's a Semi Finals week for the books! The Lions get the bunny off their back against the Demons, Daniel Rich's butt grows larger each day, and Jake Lever proves himself every bit as insolent as he appears.

In Round 22, the Swans put an end to the Magpies dream run and we talk Pat Lipinski's heritage listed nose, Ash Johnson's ascent to glory, and learn new, unexpected things about Mason Cox.

In Round 21, the Bombers and the Giants continue to flop and we get a history lesson in Adelaide's Northern suburbs, talk the latest retirement announcements, and re-evaluate our relationships with Toby Greene. Also sorry for the audio issues once again we never learn not to yell into the mic :P

In Round 20, it's Brayshaw vs Brayshaw as the Demons and the Dockers slog it out, we catch up on the latest goss, and get progressively drunker.

In Round 15, Swans and Saints play the round's most boring game whilst we are joined by Stat Man and No Points Horse to discuss Nick Blakey's various lizard-like attributes, whether or not Max King is an industry plant, and draw parallels between history's treatment of Hitler with the AFL media's treatment of Bailey Smith.

In Round 13, chaotic good Fremantle and chaotic evil Hawthorn battle it out and we catch up on the last few weeks of goss, cast Travis Colyer in the Lord of the Rings remake, and crack the case on AFL's biggest conspiracy theories.

In Round 8, the Power get redemption over the Bulldogs while we get to know Fake Person Trent Dumont, explore the possibility of a body swap with Caleb Daniel, and uncover the depths of Jeremy Finlayson's emotional repression.

In Round 7, Geelong and Fremantle tough it out as we rekindle our long-lost friendship with James Aish, mount a campaign for Gryan Miers to ditch the dreds, and honour Jamie Lee Curtis as the screen icon of our times.

We're back for Round 6 to watch Melbourne play Richmond, celebrate the legacy of Anzac Day, discuss the quality of Ben Brown's family relationships and hear from some special guests.

In Round 4, the Eagles get the better of the Magpies as we discuss how Boyz II Men are the magic connecting Rose and Darcy Moore, repurpose Shannon Hurn's hairline as the Eagles mascot for 2022, and talk about the actually real issue of tokenism in the AFL.

In Round 3, the Showdown legend lives up to the hype as Crows steal victory in a heartbreaker (for Erin). We discuss the youngest brother inferiority complex plaguing the AFL, stage a defence of Todd Marshall, and attentively watch the game unfold for the first time in several years.

In Round 2, Richmond and GWS play the year's most boring game to date while we tackle Buddy's legend status, the highs and lows of the football wilderness, insights from ABC radio, and produce a spec script for Harry Himmelberg's character arc on Home and Away.

We're back for Season 2022! And straight into it with the Kangaroos and the Hawks battling for good versus evil, ready to discuss our ever-mounting gripes with the AFL media landscape, use our powers of manifestation to create the ultimate end of season ladder predictions and make Jy Simpkin North captain.

It's finally here everyone! Grand Final Week 2021, and we celebrate with predictions, trivia, and special guests galore. Thanks for joining us for season 2021 Real Men, it's an honour to bring you the most up to date footy news each week.

It's the final hurdle and Melbourne shame Geelong to take their rightful place in the Grand Final. We talk Jack Viney and Ollie Wines' place amongst the greatest love stories ever told, the last days of Rome in Geelong, and Max Gawn's ten minutes of transcendence.

Semi finals week and boy does it deliver! The second episode in a row to deliver a one point margin, the Western Bulldogs and Brisbane Lions give us an all time great while we celebrate Father's Day with everyone's honorary dad Chris Fagan, answer burning fan questions, and blow the whistle on the AFL's secret society of Baileys.

The real men (and their sound quality problems) are back for a bumper finals series! In an elimination final as tense as they come, we watch the AFL's favourite narrative fall apart, uncover the lost post-hitting stats, and reflect on just how much can change in one season.

In Round 9, the Swans overrun the Magpies while we discuss the simple joys of collecting footy cards, cast Josh Kennedy in his motion picture debut, and the ethics of strategic sportsmanship.

In Round 7, it's first against eighteenth with the Kangaroos facing the Demons in Tassie, while Erin faces her own hangover demons, Ben Brown makes his long awaited return, and we relive the plot of Like Mike (2002) through our protagonist Bayley Fritsch.

In Round 6, Collingwood and Essendon honour the Anzacs while we discuss Will Hoskin-Elliott's determination to make an enemy of Rose, Nik Cox's homage to underage soldiers who frauded their way into the army, and how many Darcys is too many Darcys.

In Round 5, fan favourites Port and Carlton go at it while we discuss how many of our days on Earth have been memorable, the evidence-based use of reverse psychology as a game strategy, and pay our respects to Port Adelaide's fallen soldiers.

In Round 4, Melbourne and Geelong get their long sleeves out while we talk Tom Hawkins' likeness to a mutinous 1920s sailor, which footballers could most easily transition to a life on the silver screen, and debrief on the season so far.

In Round 2, the Swans battle the Crows and we battle ongoing technical difficulties, all while Erin and Rose discuss the spiritual importance of Buddy Franklin on a young girl's development, unpack the psychology of school bullies, and determine Isaac Heeney's readiness to don an SS uniform in a re-enactment of Nazi Germany.

In Round 1, Bulldogs get up against the Magpies and we discuss marketing opportunities for Aaron Naughton and his mullet, eulogise Scott Pendlebury's football career, and ponder which beast of the African plains would be Darcy Moore's spirit animal.

We're back with our predictions for the 2021 season, based of course purely in fact, science, and peer-reviewed journals.

In Round 16, we're back after a long hiatus to watch the Bulldogs and the Eagles tussle for victory and stop pretending to be interested in talking about anything else except Marcus Bontempelli and the life he could give us.

In Round 7, Robbie Gray steals a heart-stopping victory for Port against Carlton, as we reveal our official Top Five Players list, lose our grip on reality at the very sight of Patrick Cripps, and uncover the secret conspiracy amongst players wearing the number 9.

After a bye, in Round 6 we watch Essendon beat North Melbourne while stalking various players on instagram, discussing the level of personal sacrifice we should expect from our professional sportspeople, and mourn the Jasper Pittard we once knew,

In Round 4, the Power overrun the Eagles and we discuss Rose's newfound alliance with Matthew Lloyd, our stance on Tom Rockliff's leather glove, and our complicated maternal, romantic, and sexual relationship with Charlie Dixon.