Podcasts about dear prudie

On the Thanksgiving holiday, we offer this compilation of our summer advice special with Slate's "Dear Prudie".  In this encore presentation, Jenée Desmond-Harris, writer and host of Slate's Dear Prudence podcast and column -- and Brian -- offer advice to listeners struggling with a dilemma, and callers weigh in with their opinions. These interviews were lightly edited for time and clarity; the original web versions are available here: Advice With Slate's Dear Prudie (and Brian): Good Neighbors and Good Friends (August 10, 2023) Advice With Slate's Dear Prudie (and Brian): To Meddle or not to Meddle (August 17, 2023) Advice With Slate's Dear Prudie (and Brian): Grossed Out and Left Out (August 31, 2023)    

Three of our favorite segments from the week, in case you missed them. David Leonhardt traces the history of the American Dream and offers a path to reclaiming it for future generations (First) | How natural gas utilities borrowed from the tobacco playbook to downplay the health risks of gas stoves (17:26) | Advice Reprise: With Slate's Dear Prudie and Brian (35:45) If you don't subscribe to the Brian Lehrer Show on iTunes, you can do that here.

Jenée Desmond-Harris, writer and host of Slate's Dear Prudence podcast and column, and Brian offer advice to listeners struggling with a wedding-related dilemma, and callers weigh in with their opinions.

In the final installment of a summer advice series, Brian and Jenée Desmond-Harris, writer and host of Slate's Dear Prudence podcast and column, offer advice to listeners struggling with relationship challenges, while callers weigh in with their opinions. Plus, Jenée Desmond-Harris shares her one piece of unsolicited advice.. Letter 1: Dear Prudence,My 50 year old husband has been spending extra time (like hours a day, days per week..) with a barely 18 year old girl, no familial relation but  “they have a common interest” and I am “jealous and how dare you judge me”, however his interests (and this girl) succeed his interest in spending time with his own 16 and 19 year old daughters. Furthermore, this barely 18 year old girl and he are constantly texting each other, sometimes until 2 am. He's texting her from work, he was texting her from our family vacation…stupid stuff, instagram reels, songs, You Tube videos, but constant texts, flirting, not sexual, but flirting in the fact that he's obviously always thinking about her, because he's always texting her…”what's your middle name?” he asks…not the half of it..- they can go on for three hours straight with the texting…he's always inviting her on horse rides that are an all day event.. 1-2 hours drive, one way-then 3-4 hour ride, sometimes at night. “I lost both the backs of my earrings when we were wresting” she texts…He takes selfies of him and her on their horse rides (don't recall selfies of he and his own daughters-very rare!). He buys her energy drinks and other things(?)….”I've got something for you”…him…”oh…what might that be?”….her. I'm disgusted. My girls have no idea- they just know he's never here. He hardly puts his phone down on the counter to charge, he's taking it to bed with him which he's always been “against” and has always given me grief about- my phone is my alarm. Nothing new for me but SO new to him. I would hate to think after 20 years of marriage and two beautiful girls, that I am now living with a complete pervert. I don't know what to do. I've found out that he's  also looking at 18 year old girls on Instagram. GROSS. I am disgusted, I can hardly even look at him, esp in the eyes.    Letter 2: Dear Prudence,  I have been dating a great man, Ethan, for nearly two years. An acquaintance of mine introduced us on a whim, and we hit it off. We have a great relationship, with only one area of tension: his friends. He has a very close group of friends he has known for over a decade, including the person who introduced. These friends see each other infrequently in person but talk on the phone regularly and are very enthusiastic when they do see each other. When we have spent time at group dinners or parties, they all jump in and catch up like old friends, while I awkwardly watch. I am also ten years younger than all of these friends, which means I am not in the stage of life that many of them are. Additionally, these in person encounters tend to become alcohol-soaked celebrations, and Ethan does not drink and all and I drink very little and avoid doing so in situations where I am already uncomfortable. I now expect these sorts of occasions to feel draining and frustrating for me, and I feel alienated and anxious when I think about having to engage with a bunch of people who make me feel like a fly on the wall. How do I push past feeling like an outsider when I'll never be able to overcome the 15 previous years of friendship and comradery that I lack?  

Three of our favorite segments from the week, in case you missed them. The New York congressional map and a 2024 election preview (First) | Advice with Jenée Desmond-Harris, writer and host of Slate's Dear Prudence podcast and column (Starts at 14:26) | Food journalist Mark Bittman on his new project, Community Kitchen (Starts at 59:20) If you don't subscribe to the Brian Lehrer Show on iTunes, you can do that here.

In the second installment of a summer advice series, Jenée Desmond-Harris, writer and host of Slate's Dear Prudence podcast and column, and Brian offer advice to listeners struggling with a dilemma on whether to meddle in their family members' relationships, and callers weigh in with their opinions. Plus, the writer of last week's dilemma calls in to share what advice he took. First letter: My husband and I are worried about our daughter's relationship. She is 18 years old and in a relationship with another 18 year old girl. They have been together for over a year now but most of the second half of their relationship was a lot of fighting and crying and distress. Our daughter also suffers from depression and anxiety. She is a college student in a very demanding college away from home in another state but her girlfriend is not in college and at home in NYC and not working. Her girlfriend is also suffering from mental health issues. Initially, both my husband and I were very supportive of the relationship but now we feel that it is harmful to our daughter. Recently our daughter had a nervous breakdown which resulted in them almost breaking up but then they decided to restart with new ground rules and better communication strategies.My daughter assures me that she is setting better boundaries now. Also, my daughter is in therapy and this is one of her topics and goals she is working  on with the therapist. We have now told our daughter that we don't want her girlfriend to come over to our house. My dilemma is that obviously we cannot prevent our daughter from seeing her girlfriend but feel very strongly that she is making a mistake and that this will not help her get better in terms of her depression. Finally, we closed the door and insisted that her girlfriend should not come to our house, which may or may not have been a mistake on our end. On the one hand it signals that we don't believe in the relationship to be a healthy one but it also closes a door for future reconnections. We don't want to lose our daughter and we want her to be well. It is very hard to watch her being hurt. Second letter: Dear Prudence: A few months after my mom left my dad in February 2020, I became suspicious of her relationship with her ‘best friend'. I did some light snooping on her phone and found concrete evidence that they were in a relationship. After struggling with this information for a few more months, I confronted my mom and she told me her plan was to keep their relationship secret for the foreseeable future, and to please keep my mouth shut. It's been about two years since then and I've had a few conversations with my mom where she's indicated an interest in telling her sister and parents, as well as my younger siblings, but her partner is very anxious about the whole situation and refuses to entertain the idea. My mom has said by the time my sister graduates high school next year she will have to figure out a solution with her partner, but I don't believe she will. She is extremely conflict avoidant, has told me other things she planned to change about her relationship that never came to fruition, and it is all very reminiscent of my parents divorce, where she bottled up her concerns for years and then abruptly left my dad. I have been quite frustrated at having to keep this secret, especially from my siblings who I feel deserve to know, and I routinely entertain plans to blow her cover. I am feeling more and more confident in deciding to hold my mom to her statement that she will find a solution by the time my sister graduates in the spring, like if she doesn't tell everyone by then I will, but I'm not sure if this is the right call. Should I do something even sooner? Every day I wait, I hear suspicions from more and more people about the nature of their relationship, including my dad and sister who seem to have bonded over speculating. On the other hand, I've kept the secret for this long. Am I really helping anything by forcing her hand? What should I do?

Three of our favorite segments from the week, in case you missed them. Advice With Slate's Dear Prudie and Brian (First) | What to Do About All the Cats (Starts at 43:16) | The West Indian Roots of Hip Hop (Starts at 1:07:58) If you don't subscribe to the Brian Lehrer Show on iTunes, you can do that here.

In the first installment of a summer advice series, Jenée Desmond-Harris, writer and host of Slate's Dear Prudence podcast and column, and Brian offer advice to listeners struggling with a dilemma, and callers weigh in with their opinions. First Letter: Dear Prudence (and Brian): I live in a 'luxury' high rise condo in Brooklyn. A few of our neighbors are in the habit of storing various items in our common hallway, ranging from doormats to stacks of empty water cooler jugs to baby strollers. (including one 2 feet from my door) Beyond the fact that they're unsightly, they represent a violation of NYC's fire code. Not wanting to offend people we see on a daily basis, we notified building management and they have sent a few email reminders to residents, but to no avail. Should I accept this as a fact of life in a building that is not a co-op and therefore lacks a share-holders' board of rule enforcers or should I somehow escalate my concerns? Second Letter:  Dear Prudence (and Brian): Michael, a friend of mine for over 35 years, is now 67 years old. A shift is taking place: Michael does not have personal conversations with me anymore, instead he speaks to me as if giving a lecture. Loud, forceful diatribes about politics, money, relationships…. He is the EXPERT on all things now. This tendency is relatively new, and I have witnessed this shift gradually over the last few years (especially about politics – and we are both progressive liberals). I want to be supportive of Paul, but I find myself getting sucked into his rants, and these turn into arguments between us, usually over obscure and meaningless facts. Some background: Each of us are now experiencing age-based health issues, along with family stuff like aging parents. I've witnessed that he goes on automatic overdrive ramping up any simple talk into an argument. And now I'm avoiding speaking with him about anything. How do I shift these conversations into meaningful personal and heartfelt talks about each of our lives, instead of these 'fact' arguments? We have had so many great supportive conversations over these many years, and I miss them. How do I kindly head off his rants at the pass?  

On this bonus episode from our friends at Slate's Dear Prudence podcast—Bomani Jones (host of HBO's Game Theory With Bomani Jones and The Right Time With Bomani Jones) joins Prudie (Jenée Desmond-Harris) to answer questions from letter writers about workplace socializing, friends who are no longer likable people, and youth football. Podcast production by Se'era Spragley Ricks and Daisy Rosario, with help from Brandon Nix. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ian loses quite a lot of rights and gets his character absolutely assassinated in the process.Relevant links: Dear Prudie - https://slate.com/human-interest/2016/11/dear-prudence-i-told-my-wife-ive-been-more-attracted-to-other-women.html (The letter we reference is the first! CW for emotional manipulation and threatening suicide in one letter further down in this link)Gotta Go My Own Way (Star Wars Edition) - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VXowfha2dTE (a classic, always relevant)

DadChat ends at 9:36! Nate and Francis discuss the true story of Captain Tom Moore, the World War II veteran who enchanted Britain by walking around his garden to raise money for the state-funded healthcare service that shouldn't need to receive charitable donations. He got knighted, he got commemorated, he got sent to Barbados on a charity publicity trip and then got covid and died. But it turns out: it started as elder abuse and ended as a grift! And we talk a lot about Britain's fixation on its World War symbology, plus a lot more.   For this week's bonus, Joe, Francis, and Carey read from letters sent to Dear Prudie and determine what they think would be the best possible advice. If your kid is attracted to pokemon or you're looking for the most tactful way to tell your neighbors that you want to swim naked in your above-ground pool, this is the episode for you. Get it on Patreon here: https://www.patreon.com/posts/62550842   *SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT* We now have a storefront to sell the patches, buttons, and magnets that we also give out as flair for our $10 tier. Buy some sweet gear here: https://www.hellofawaytodie.com/shop We have a YouTube channel now -- subscribe here and get sweet videos from us in which we yell in our cars like true veterans: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCwlHZpNTz-h6aTeQiJrEDKw You can follow the show on Twitter here: @HellOfAWay Follow Nate here: @inthesedeserts Follow Francis here: @ArmyStrang

Stav's back for an end-of-the-year round of relationship advice. We analyze Madison Cawthorn's failed relationship, answer Dear Prudie questions, and look at a NYT op-ed about how it's normal and cool to hate your husband. All things Stavvy at https://stavvy.biz/ Tickets for our Southern tour are on sale over at chapotraphouse.com/live

Is a BDSM dungeon on your sexual bucket list? You might be surprised about how actual dungeons operate. In this episode, the Wives explore public BDSM dungeons, including an interview with Dungeon East owner Mistress Justine Cross.  First, get ready for Halloween with this episode's cocktail: the Black Widow, while Ams shares her first experience as a unicorn to another couple.  Next, the Wives discuss what a dungeon is and why you might want to visit one.  A BDSM dungeon is a room or space designated specifically for BDSM (i.e. - Bondage and Discipline, Dominance and Submission, Sadism and Masochism) play or scenes. Public dungeons can be found in fetish studios, sex work spaces, sex clubs, warehouses and nightclubs (sometimes during specific fetish parties and themed nights) and are usually open to the public. A dungeon is a great place to explore kinkier, edgier play, surrounded by people who LOVE to demonstrate their skills.  You can learn, you can watch and you can experience kink including spanking, flogging, bondage and suspension.  You can also experience toys and equipment that you might not be willing to invest in at home, such as St. Andrew's cross's (Ams' favorite!), hooks and bars or suspension play, spanking benches and impact toys.  To get an expert's opinion, the Wives interview Mistress Justine Cross, owner of Dungeon East in Los Angeles, California.  Finally, the Wives set themselves sexy homework: visiting an actual dungeon for newbie night...and more… About Mistress Justine Cross she/her Mistress Justine is a professional BDSM consultant and lifestyle Dominatrix based in Los Angeles. She is the owner of Dungeon East, Los Angeles's premiere dungeon studio. With over 10 years' experience as a lifestyle Dominatrix and BDSM consultant, Mistress Justine's expertise and creativity has been called on for dozens of print, radio, and video productions.  She has appeared as herself on Funny or Die, A&E, Lifetime and VH1. She has appeared on numerous podcasts including Savage Love, Dear Prudie and American Sex and for a number of campaigns and projects for major brands such an educational intro to BDSM series for Yandy. Extensively interviewed and profiled, Mistress Justine has been featured in Los Angeles Magazine, Playboy, Nylon, LA Weekly, Time Out Los Angeles, Buzzfeed, Salon, Vice, Huffington Post and The Guardian. Internationally recognized and followed, she typically travels all over the world. Justine runs BDSFemme - a play party party for cis and trans women and co-hosts Deviant, an all gender queer play party. With the mainstream growing more aware of BDSM, Mistress Justine's opportunities to educate and correct the kink curious have expanded, and she's been invited to be a guest speaker or teach classes on BDSM, safer sex practices, consent, and more at places like UCLA,Los Angeles LGBT Center and Folx. Justine loves oyster happy hours, craft cocktails and cats. She is fully vaccinated and still taking COVID precautions very seriously. Subscribe to her newsletter her. Follow her on twitter: justineplays and instagram/clubhouse/tiktok: thejustinecross Contact: dungeonlosangeles@gmail.com or 323-739-4562 Website: https://www.losangelesdominatrix.com/    

After Katie and Jesse discuss their July 4th plans, the hosts talk about Nikole Hannah-Jones winning her tenure battle, Barclays' cringeworthy contribution to Pride discourse, and the complicated tale of the publishing and unpublishing and re-publishing of "I Sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter," aka "Helicopter Story." Make sure to check out our sponsor, Ground News, at https://ground.news/blockedandreported (https://ground.news/blockedandreported) Show notes/Links: Nikole Hannah-Jones stuff: https://www.dailytarheel.com/article/2021/06/university-nhj-tenure-decision (https://www.dailytarheel.com/article/2021/06/university-nhj-tenure-decision) https://www.dailytarheel.com/article/2021/06/nikole-hannah-jones-will-not-accept-position-without-tenure (https://www.dailytarheel.com/article/2021/06/nikole-hannah-jones-will-not-accept-position-without-tenure) https://www.npr.org/2021/06/30/1011880598/after-contentious-debate-unc-grants-tenure-to-nikole-hannah-jones (https://www.npr.org/2021/06/30/1011880598/after-contentious-debate-unc-grants-tenure-to-nikole-hannah-jones) https://www.naacpldf.org/press-release/nikole-hannah-jones-issues-statement-on-unc-board-of-trustees-vote/ (https://www.naacpldf.org/press-release/nikole-hannah-jones-issues-statement-on-unc-board-of-trustees-vote/) https://twitter.com/nhannahjones/status/1410326615876378626?s=20 (https://twitter.com/nhannahjones/status/1410326615876378626?s=20) Slate advice columns: -Racist white son wants to learn Spanish: https://slate.com/human-interest/2021/06/maximizing-sleep-with-infants-parenting-advice-from-care-and-feeding.html (https://slate.com/human-interest/2021/06/maximizing-sleep-with-infants-parenting-advice-from-care-and-feeding.html) Straight woman in a Classic Millennial Sex Pickle: https://slate.com/human-interest/2020/01/straight-woman-dating-on-grindr.html (https://slate.com/human-interest/2020/01/straight-woman-dating-on-grindr.html) Katie's response: https://www.thestranger.com/slog/2020/01/30/42716089/do-straight-women-belong-on-gay-datings-apps-no (https://www.thestranger.com/slog/2020/01/30/42716089/do-straight-women-belong-on-gay-datings-apps-no) Note back to Katie: “Hey! I'm the odious Slate letter writer you covered in this piece - https://www.thestranger.com/slog/2020/01/30/42716089/do-straight-women-belong-on-gay-datings-apps-no (https://www.thestranger.com/slog/2020/01/30/42716089/do-straight-women-belong-on-gay-datings-apps-no). Just wanted to say that your take was 100% accurate--I was being very shitty and very dumb. Should have accepted being straight and worked on my own gender-role-angst instead of trying to drag queer people into my bullshit a LOT earlier in my life, good lord. Anyway! Belated thanks for the wakeup call, and sorry I'm opting for the anonymous-reddit means of contacting you, like a coward - just going this route because I am, in fact, a coward.” More classic Slate advice columns: https://slate.com/human-interest/2019/09/child-sociopath-counseling-care-and-feeding.html (https://slate.com/human-interest/2019/09/child-sociopath-counseling-care-and-feeding.html) “We live in a very multicultural and socioeconomically diverse area in South Florida. We are white, and both my husband and I are well-off professionals. Our 4½-year-old daughter has grown up socializing with all types of children and has a close friend who is black and one who is Brazilian. …” https://slate.com/human-interest/2020/06/colorblind-parenting-race-care-and-feeding.html (https://slate.com/human-interest/2020/06/colorblind-parenting-race-care-and-feeding.html) My family is white, and we live in a predominately white neighborhood. However, our kids (twin boys) went to a local public charter elementary and middle school that was very diverse. When it was time for high school, our twins were lucky enough to have their closest friends from elementary and middle school attend the same school. Each of the boys had a diverse group of friends, and they were taken aback, as freshmen in high school, by the way other kids sat at tables in same-race clusters. The kids who'd gone to our (small) middle school, where tables were assigned by grade, continued to hang out at lunch together as a mixed group. https://slate.com/human-interest/2020/10/kid-police-obsession-care-and-feeding.html (https://slate.com/human-interest/2020/10/kid-police-obsession-care-and-feeding.html) “My lovely, outgoing son is 5 years old. For the past year or so, he has been absolutely obsessed with police officers. He loves their uniforms, cars, and dogs. He tells everyone he wants to be a policeman when he grows up, and whenever he sees a police officer, he runs up to them and says hi. In our overwhelmingly white suburb, this is always well received; cops are usually idle and don't mind letting him touch their cars or look at their outfits…” https://slate.com/human-interest/2021/01/cop-brother-friends-harass-about-police-brutality-dear-prudence-advice.html (https://slate.com/human-interest/2021/01/cop-brother-friends-harass-about-police-brutality-dear-prudence-advice.html) Q. My brother, a police officer, is getting blacklisted by my friends: My brother (he's older by two years) is a police officer. This was his childhood dream, and he's dedicated his entire life to making it happen. Prudie, he's wonderful. He leads his department's restorative justice seminars, he was fighting for anti-bias training three years ago before it was widespread, and he spends much of his free time at the local rec center mentoring at-risk youth. https://slate.com/human-interest/2021/06/kimono-cultural-appropriation-care-and-feeding.html (https://slate.com/human-interest/2021/06/kimono-cultural-appropriation-care-and-feeding.html) “My husband's closest friend from childhood is Japanese American, and although he moved back to Japan after college, they are still very close. He's our daughters' godfather, and they think of him and his wife as another uncle and aunt (we're also called “Uncle” and “Auntie” by his kids). For our daughter's fifth birthday, they sent her a sweet gift of a box full of Japanese candies, a stuffed toy, and a kimono in her size. It's absolutely gorgeous, but I'm hesitant to let her wear it, as much as she's begged us to let her dress up and show it to her friends. I know how big of an issue cultural appropriation is, and I don't want to let her think that somebody else's culture is a costume. She has a lot of anti-racist children's books, and books about kids from other cultures celebrating holidays and traditions, and this could be a great way for us to talk about the problem of white people appropriating other cultures and using them as costumes—but also, our friends have been asking us if she liked her kimono, and I don't know what to tell them! I will confess: I don't want to be thought of as another insensitive white lady who lets her kids “dress up” as stereotypes of other cultures, and that may be part of what's holding me back from letting her wear it, so I think an outside perspective might help. What should I do—let her wear it, or talk to her about why she can't?” https://slate.com/human-interest/2021/05/masculinity-incel-crisis-care-and-feeding.html (https://slate.com/human-interest/2021/05/masculinity-incel-crisis-care-and-feeding.html) My son is 14, and he's coping with identity issues that I could really use some advice about. Last night, he was complaining about English class. “All we talk about is stuff like, I dunno. How women are so great and can defend themselves and shit.” Alarm bells, right? I probed a little, and he started getting upset. He talked about the girls in his class being aggressive towards the boys, accusing them of … he wasn't sure what. Mumbled a few things about sexism, the patriarchy. “You know, this whole ‘kill all men' thing.'” And with that, he burst into tears. “I'm white—I'm male—and I'm probably straight!” he sobbed (at 14, he maintains that the jury is still out on that last one). “It's like, I can't say anything! And the girls, they can say anything they like!” Of course, we talked about those girls being out of line, but also about how real sexism is—that he can be proud of who he is and support feminism (and Black Lives Matter, and LGBTQ rights, etc.) at the same time. And ignore purposefully provocative stuff like #killallmen. Still, I'm concerned. My feeling is that he's pretty well inoculated against racist and homophobic propaganda. But clearly, he's struggling with his masculinity. I really worry that he might stumble across a few clever Jordan Peterson videos and end up falling down some nasty male-power incel rabbit hole … Do you have any advice as to how to deal with this? In particular, do you know of any good age-appropriate books or podcasts or shows or whatever that deal with these topics—especially the “crisis of masculinity”—in a sensitive way? A way that's in sync with feminist values?” When Savage love and Dear Prudie got the same question and gave opposite advice: https://slate.com/human-interest/2021/03/husband-sexting-cousin-dear-prudence-advice.html (https://slate.com/human-interest/2021/03/husband-sexting-cousin-dear-prudence-advice.html) https://www.metrotimes.com/detroit/savage-love-devastation/Content?oid=26562553 (https://www.metrotimes.com/detroit/savage-love-devastation/Content?oid=26562553) Back when Prudie was good: https://slate.com/human-interest/2012/07/dear-prudie-is-drunken-sex-with-my-husband-a-form-of-abuse.html (https://slate.com/human-interest/2012/07/dear-prudie-is-drunken-sex-with-my-husband-a-form-of-abuse.html) Barclays: https://www.barclays.co.uk/diversity/?linkId=100000052339480 (https://www.barclays.co.uk/diversity/?linkId=100000052339480) -“Barclays agreed Thursday to pay the United States $2 billion for allegedly deceiving investors about the quality of mortgage deals that fueled the 2008 financial crisis.”: https://money.cnn.com/2018/03/29/investing/barclays-mortgage-settlement/index.html (https://money.cnn.com/2018/03/29/investing/barclays-mortgage-settlement/index.html) -A thread from the BARPod subreddit supporting Katie's Lesbian Extinction Theory (LET): https://np.reddit.com/r/BlockedAndReported/comments/ob7ckj/imalesbianandjustfoundoutyetanother_one (https://np.reddit.com/r/BlockedAndReported/comments/ob7ckj/im_a_lesbian_and_just_found_out_yet_another_one) Isabel Fall / “I Sexually Identify As An Attack Helicopter”: -The story itself: https://archive.is/oXDEt#selection-483.0-483.43 (https://archive.is/oXDEt#selection-483.0-483.43) -Jesse's rundown: https://jessesingal.substack.com/p/the-deeply-depressing-unpublishing (https://jessesingal.substack.com/p/the-deeply-depressing-unpublishing) -Vox: https://www.vox.com/the-highlight/22543858/isabel-fall-attack-helicopter (https://www.vox.com/the-highlight/22543858/isabel-fall-attack-helicopter) -N.K. Jemison was glad that the harmful story she didn't read was taken down: https://twitter.com/jessesingal/status/1410589280033021956 (https://twitter.com/jessesingal/status/1410589280033021956) -Contrapoints: “Just because you were hurt by content I made doesn't mean that that content is bad, or that I'm victimizing you in some way.” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OjMPJVmXxV8&ab_channel=ContraPoints (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OjMPJVmXxV8&ab_channel=ContraPoints)

After Katie and Jesse discuss their July 4th plans, the hosts talk about Nikole Hannah-Jones winning her tenure battle, Barclays' cringeworthy contribution to Pride discourse, and the complicated tale of the publishing and unpublishing and re-publishing of "I Sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter," aka "Helicopter Story."Show notes/Links:Nikole Hannah-Jones stuff:https://www.dailytarheel.com/article/2021/06/university-nhj-tenure-decisionhttps://www.dailytarheel.com/article/2021/06/nikole-hannah-jones-will-not-accept-position-without-tenurehttps://www.npr.org/2021/06/30/1011880598/after-contentious-debate-unc-grants-tenure-to-nikole-hannah-joneshttps://www.naacpldf.org/press-release/nikole-hannah-jones-issues-statement-on-unc-board-of-trustees-vote/https://twitter.com/nhannahjones/status/1410326615876378626?s=20Slate advice columns:-Racist white son wants to learn Spanish: https://slate.com/human-interest/2021/06/maximizing-sleep-with-infants-parenting-advice-from-care-and-feeding.htmlStraight woman in a Classic Millennial Sex Pickle: https://slate.com/human-interest/2020/01/straight-woman-dating-on-grindr.htmlKatie's response: https://www.thestranger.com/slog/2020/01/30/42716089/do-straight-women-belong-on-gay-datings-apps-no Note back to Katie: “Hey! I'm the odious Slate letter writer you covered in this piece - https://www.thestranger.com/slog/2020/01/30/42716089/do-straight-women-belong-on-gay-datings-apps-no. Just wanted to say that your take was 100% accurate--I was being very shitty and very dumb. Should have accepted being straight and worked on my own gender-role-angst instead of trying to drag queer people into my b******t a LOT earlier in my life, good lord. Anyway! Belated thanks for the wakeup call, and sorry I'm opting for the anonymous-reddit means of contacting you, like a coward - just going this route because I am, in fact, a coward.”More classic Slate advice columns:https://slate.com/human-interest/2019/09/child-sociopath-counseling-care-and-feeding.html“We live in a very multicultural and socioeconomically diverse area in South Florida. We are white, and both my husband and I are well-off professionals. Our 4½-year-old daughter has grown up socializing with all types of children and has a close friend who is black and one who is Brazilian. …”https://slate.com/human-interest/2020/06/colorblind-parenting-race-care-and-feeding.htmlMy family is white, and we live in a predominately white neighborhood. However, our kids (twin boys) went to a local public charter elementary and middle school that was very diverse. When it was time for high school, our twins were lucky enough to have their closest friends from elementary and middle school attend the same school. Each of the boys had a diverse group of friends, and they were taken aback, as freshmen in high school, by the way other kids sat at tables in same-race clusters. The kids who’d gone to our (small) middle school, where tables were assigned by grade, continued to hang out at lunch together as a mixed group.https://slate.com/human-interest/2020/10/kid-police-obsession-care-and-feeding.html“My lovely, outgoing son is 5 years old. For the past year or so, he has been absolutely obsessed with police officers. He loves their uniforms, cars, and dogs. He tells everyone he wants to be a policeman when he grows up, and whenever he sees a police officer, he runs up to them and says hi. In our overwhelmingly white suburb, this is always well received; cops are usually idle and don’t mind letting him touch their cars or look at their outfits…”https://slate.com/human-interest/2021/01/cop-brother-friends-harass-about-police-brutality-dear-prudence-advice.htmlQ. My brother, a police officer, is getting blacklisted by my friends: My brother (he’s older by two years) is a police officer. This was his childhood dream, and he’s dedicated his entire life to making it happen. Prudie, he’s wonderful. He leads his department’s restorative justice seminars, he was fighting for anti-bias training three years ago before it was widespread, and he spends much of his free time at the local rec center mentoring at-risk youth.https://slate.com/human-interest/2021/06/kimono-cultural-appropriation-care-and-feeding.html“My husband’s closest friend from childhood is Japanese American, and although he moved back to Japan after college, they are still very close. He’s our daughters’ godfather, and they think of him and his wife as another uncle and aunt (we’re also called “Uncle” and “Auntie” by his kids). For our daughter’s fifth birthday, they sent her a sweet gift of a box full of Japanese candies, a stuffed toy, and a kimono in her size. It’s absolutely gorgeous, but I’m hesitant to let her wear it, as much as she’s begged us to let her dress up and show it to her friends. I know how big of an issue cultural appropriation is, and I don’t want to let her think that somebody else’s culture is a costume. She has a lot of anti-racist children’s books, and books about kids from other cultures celebrating holidays and traditions, and this could be a great way for us to talk about the problem of white people appropriating other cultures and using them as costumes—but also, our friends have been asking us if she liked her kimono, and I don’t know what to tell them! I will confess: I don’t want to be thought of as another insensitive white lady who lets her kids “dress up” as stereotypes of other cultures, and that may be part of what’s holding me back from letting her wear it, so I think an outside perspective might help. What should I do—let her wear it, or talk to her about why she can’t?”https://slate.com/human-interest/2021/05/masculinity-incel-crisis-care-and-feeding.htmlMy son is 14, and he’s coping with identity issues that I could really use some advice about. Last night, he was complaining about English class. “All we talk about is stuff like, I dunno. How women are so great and can defend themselves and s**t.” Alarm bells, right? I probed a little, and he started getting upset. He talked about the girls in his class being aggressive towards the boys, accusing them of … he wasn’t sure what. Mumbled a few things about sexism, the patriarchy. “You know, this whole ‘kill all men’ thing.’” And with that, he burst into tears. “I’m white—I’m male—and I’m probably straight!” he sobbed (at 14, he maintains that the jury is still out on that last one). “It’s like, I can’t say anything! And the girls, they can say anything they like!” Of course, we talked about those girls being out of line, but also about how real sexism is—that he can be proud of who he is and support feminism (and Black Lives Matter, and LGBTQ rights, etc.) at the same time. And ignore purposefully provocative stuff like #killallmen.Still, I’m concerned. My feeling is that he’s pretty well inoculated against racist and homophobic propaganda. But clearly, he’s struggling with his masculinity. I really worry that he might stumble across a few clever Jordan Peterson videos and end up falling down some nasty male-power incel rabbit hole … Do you have any advice as to how to deal with this? In particular, do you know of any good age-appropriate books or podcasts or shows or whatever that deal with these topics—especially the “crisis of masculinity”—in a sensitive way? A way that’s in sync with feminist values?”When Savage love and Dear Prudie got the same question and gave opposite advice:https://slate.com/human-interest/2021/03/husband-sexting-cousin-dear-prudence-advice.htmlhttps://www.metrotimes.com/detroit/savage-love-devastation/Content?oid=26562553Back when Prudie was good:https://slate.com/human-interest/2012/07/dear-prudie-is-drunken-sex-with-my-husband-a-form-of-abuse.htmlBarclays:https://www.barclays.co.uk/diversity/?linkId=100000052339480-“Barclays agreed Thursday to pay the United States $2 billion for allegedly deceiving investors about the quality of mortgage deals that fueled the 2008 financial crisis.”: https://money.cnn.com/2018/03/29/investing/barclays-mortgage-settlement/index.html -A thread from the BARPod subreddit supporting Katie's Lesbian Extinction Theory (LET): https://np.reddit.com/r/BlockedAndReported/comments/ob7ckj/im_a_lesbian_and_just_found_out_yet_another_one Isabel Fall / “I Sexually Identify As An Attack Helicopter”:-The story itself: https://archive.is/oXDEt#selection-483.0-483.43 -Jesse's rundown: https://jessesingal.substack.com/p/the-deeply-depressing-unpublishing -Vox: https://www.vox.com/the-highlight/22543858/isabel-fall-attack-helicopter-N.K. Jemison was glad that the harmful story she didn't read was taken down: https://twitter.com/jessesingal/status/1410589280033021956 -Contrapoints: “Just because you were hurt by content I made doesn't mean that that content is bad, or that I’m victimizing you in some way.”https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OjMPJVmXxV8&ab_channel=ContraPoints This is a public episode. Get access to private episodes at www.blockedandreported.org/subscribe

This week the advice columnists are moving aside — we providing the advice. We picked some letter from Dear Prudie, and figured out what we'd tell them to do. We shouldn't be advice columnists.

Due to an unprecedented letter writing campaign from our fans, we were forced to rescind Phil’s lifetime ban from the show. We welcome back lil Phil to talk about the new MGK movie, the misadventures of Tony Fauci, and the complex relationship dynamics of characters from the classic film Shrek. Phil brings in his unique perspective to help the boys answer some questions about parents lying to their kids. Then, Adrian interviews Phil to talk about his most iconic bars in both battles and top 40 singles. Article 1- Basic Dad https://www.dollarshaveclub.com/content/story/what-do-i-tell-my-kids-about-that-racist-relative Article 2- Dear Prudie https://slate.com/human-interest/2012/08/dear-prudie-i-lied-and-told-our-son-the-dog-died-now-he-wants-to-exhume-the-body.html 3rd segment- Rap Genius style interview with Phil: “What are you meaning by this?” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Ju1CR1S4vM

Episode 56 - IT'S THE FINALE!!!! And what finale would be complete without a wedding. Ashley and Joy try their hands at advice columns. They aren't advice columnists, but they love giving advice. Find out what happens when they dip their noses and opinions in some widespread advice columns such as Dear Abby and Dear Prudie from everything to sorry boyfriends, confederate scholarships, hyper anxious maids of honor, and not so top chefs... it's part THREE of advice columns done our way. Enjoy the ride. Follow our antics daily and join our That Wednesday Life community by: 1.  Following us @challenge.courage on Facebook and Instagram; 2.  Joining our 24/7 blog and connections community - https://thatwednesdaylife.com.  3.  Got questions or comments?  Email: Challengeyoself@gmail.com to connect with us. 4.  The details are below to leave a voice message. We love to hear from you! Oh and make sure to leave a review for us on Apple itunes/podcasts. Challenge Yo Self! --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/boldstandards/message

Episode 55 - IT'S PART TWO!!!! Ashley and Joy try their hands at advice columns. They aren't advice columnists, but they love giving advice. Find out what happens when they dip their noses and opinions in some widespread advice columns such as Dear Abby and Dear Prudie from everything to sorry boyfriends, confederate scholarships, hyper anxious maids of honor, and not so top chefs... it's part two of three of advice columns done our way. Enjoy the ride. Follow our antics daily and join our That Wednesday Life community by: 1.  Following us @challenge.courage on Facebook and Instagram; 2.  Joining our 24/7 blog and connections community - https://thatwednesdaylife.com.  3.  Got questions or comments?  Email: Challengeyoself@gmail.com to connect with us. 4.  The details are below to leave a voice message. We love to hear from you! Oh and make sure to leave a review for us on Apple itunes/podcasts. Challenge Yo Self! --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/boldstandards/message

Episode 54 - Ashley and Joy try their hands at advice columns. Find out what happens when they dip their noses and opinions in some widespread advice columns such as Dear Abby and Dear Prudie from everything to sorry boyfriends, confederate scholarships, hyper anxious maids of honor, and not so top chefs... it's part one of three of advice columns done our way. Enjoy the ride. Follow our antics daily and join our That Wednesday Life community by: 1.  Following us @challenge.courage on Facebook and Instagram; 2.  Joining our 24/7 blog and connections community - https://thatwednesdaylife.com.  3.  Got questions or comments?  Email: Challengeyoself@gmail.com to connect with us. 4.  The details are below to leave a voice message. We love to hear from you! Oh and make sure to leave a review for us on Apple itunes/podcasts. Challenge Yo Self! --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/boldstandards/message

Jesse and Brittany discuss “Dear Prudie” and childhood insecurities and how we deal with them in adulthood, listener emails and voicemails related to white supremacy and changing your mind, the controversy surrounding Omarosa recording White House staff and whether or not Trump is on tape saying the n-word, the press briefing and Sarah Huckabee Sanders'... The post #437 – “Insecurities & Advice Columns, Omarosa vs. Trump, Huckabee Sanders Cannot Guarantee, and Awful Trump Tweets.” appeared first on I Doubt It Podcast.

Amber's back, but still sick. We talk about the Texas flood, the Mensch Files, and read another selection of Dear Prudie. Lotta mispronounced words in this one. Listen here: https://www.patreon.com/posts/episode-137-8-29-14114256

Clio Chang (@cliomiso) joins us to talk Mark Zuccerberg, universal basic income, its popularity among libertarians and its limitations for the rest of us. For the second half of the show we read Dear Prudie letters to Amber, resident advice columnist. Write in to Amber's column Your Sorry Ass: yoursorryass@thebaffler.com

Jos Lavery is back to help with more of your questions! First, two very different letters about depression: my husband has disengaged from our marriage; a friend I’m not very close to anymore is using me as his only emotional outlet. Then, I like my stepdaughters better than my own kid – am I a terrible mother? (Plus, the secret to getting a young Dear Prudie to behave is revealed!) Hear more Prudence by joining Slate Plus: Slate.com/Prudiepod. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jos Lavery is back to help with more of your questions! First, two very different letters about depression: my husband has disengaged from our marriage; a friend I’m not very close to anymore is using me as his only emotional outlet. Then, I like my stepdaughters better than my own kid – am I a terrible mother? (Plus, the secret to getting a young Dear Prudie to behave is revealed!) Hear more Prudence by joining Slate Plus: Slate.com/Prudiepod. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week, we have a long chat with Liza Featherstone, journalist, advice-columnist and editor of "False Choices: The Faux Feminism of Hillary Rodham Clinton." Liza walks us through the Democrats tepid opposition to Trump and his band of Pepes, trickle-down feminism, and a finale feating a live advice call-in from readers of the Federalist and Dear Prudie.

In two separate calls, straight men are harassed by their gay male friends. One caller had his buddy drunkenly grope him. The other's pal assails him with aggressive sexual innuendo. Knock it off fellas! A married woman has a husband who doesn't trust her. She comes home late from her bar job and he assumes she's cheating on him. She's never been unfaithful. How can she turn this ship around? On the Magnum, Dan gets a Second Opinion from Mallory Ortberg, Slate's delightful, new “Dear Prudie” advice columnist. Dan throws Mallory in the deep end with a call from a woman whose 60 year-old housesitter might have riffled through her sex toy drawer, and concludes with a call from the brother of a child rapist. Welcome to the advice business, Mallory! 206-302-2064 The Savage Lovecast is sponsored by Casper, an online retailer of premium mattresses for a fraction of the price -- because everyone deserves a great night's sleep.  Get $50 off any mattress purchase by visiting casper.com/savage and enter the promo code savage. This episode is also brought to you by Squarespace.com. They make it easy to build a website or blog. Give it a whirl, and if you want to buy it, use the code Savage for a 10% discount and free web domain registration. This podcast is also brought to you by Stamps.com. Click on the microphone and enter "Savage" for $55 free postage and a digital scale.

In two separate calls, straight men are harassed by their gay male friends. One caller had his buddy drunkenly grope him. The other's pal assails him with aggressive sexual innuendo. Knock it off fellas! A married woman has a husband who doesn't trust her. She comes home late from her bar job and he assumes she's cheating on him. She's never been unfaithful. How can she turn this ship around? On the Magnum, Dan gets a Second Opinion from Mallory Ortberg, Slate's delightful, new “Dear Prudie” advice columnist. Dan throws Mallory in the deep end with a call from a woman whose 60 year-old housesitter might have riffled through her sex toy drawer, and concludes with a call from the brother of a child rapist. Welcome to the advice business, Mallory! 206-302-2064 The Savage Lovecast is sponsored by Casper, an online retailer of premium mattresses for a fraction of the price -- because everyone deserves a great night's sleep.  Get $50 off any mattress purchase by visiting casper.com/savage and enter the promo code savage. This episode is also brought to you by Squarespace.com. They make it easy to build a website or blog. Give it a whirl, and if you want to buy it, use the code Savage for a 10% discount and free web domain registration. This podcast is also brought to you by Stamps.com. Click on the microphone and enter "Savage" for $55 free postage and a digital scale.

Hanna Rosin, June Thomas, and Noreen Malone discuss bathroom equality, the new company Need-a-Mom, and Dear Prudie's nearly 10 years of doling out advice with Emily Yoffe.   Double X is brought to you by Club W, leading the "grape to glass" wine revolution. Answer just six simple questions at ClubW.com and their algorithm will create a Palate Profile just for you. Get wine directly to your door, perfectly customized to match your taste. For 50 percent off your first order, go to ClubW.com/doublex.         And by BollandBranch.com, the company that makes luxury bedding affordable. Get the nicest sheets you've ever owned for about half the price of what stores and boutiques are charging. Order right now and they'll give you $50 off a set of sheets, plus free shipping. Go to BollAndBranch.com and use the promo code DOUBLEX. And by The Great Courses Plus, a new video learning service with more than 5,000 lectures. As a member of The Great Courses Plus, you can watch as many lectures as you want, anytime, anywhere, on any device. Sign up for a free one-month trial by visiting TheGreatCoursesPlus.com/doublex. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jesse and Brittany discuss their frustrations with advice columns, listener emails, Dollemocracy '16 featuring Donald Trump's prayer, Joe Biden's possible run, and Ben Carson's shooting reactions on Fox News and other media outlets, which leads to the interview with Victor, a gun rights supporter. Sound off with a text or voicemail of fewer than three... The post I Doubt It #162 – “Dear Prudie & Bad Breath, Listener Follow-up, Dollemocracy '16 feat. Donald Trump's Prayer Service, Pro Joe Biden Super Pac, and Ben Carson's Oregon Shooting Reaction, and an Interview with Victor, the Gun Supporter.” appeared first on I Doubt It Podcast.