How To! With Charles Duhigg

Jordan is mired in a bitter war over off-leash pups at an unofficial dog park. With pro-leash forces deploying fake signage, ambush videos, and questionable zip-tie tactics in a campaign of shame aimed at her fellow dog owners, Jordan is ready to take matters into her own hands. In this first installment of How To's guide to becoming an antihero, Courtney Martin brings on writer, storyteller, and comedian Matthew Dicks to counsel Jordan in the art of getting even. (Read Slate's Revenge Week spectacular.) A little treat: ⁠Jordan's pup, Ziggy! ⁠ Next week: How To Be an Ethical Hater. (Can't wait for antihero guidance? Check out How To Be the Next Erin Brockovich and How To Confront a Crazy Neighbor (Featuring Tig Notaro). Are you carrying a petty grudge? Don't get over it—we want to hear your story! Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer. Special thanks to Sophie Summergrad. Get more of How To! with Slate Plus! Join for exclusive bonus episodes of How To! and ad-free listening on all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe from the How To! show page on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus for access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Kate is juggling a lot: work, kids, caregiving for an elder, a dance troupe, the PTA, community organizing. Oh, and she runs a ‘90s-themed DJ night, too. On this episode of How To!, Courtney Martin brings on Oliver Burkeman, author of Four Thousand Weeks and Meditations for Mortals, to talk with Kate about how to stop doing everything all the time. If you liked this episode check out: How To Manage Your Precious Time Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer. Get more of How To! with Slate Plus! Join for exclusive bonus episodes of How To! and ad-free listening on all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe from the How To! show page on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus for access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Kate stopped reading in 2016. Since then, she's tried to find her way back to it but something's not clicking, and it's left a book-shaped hole in her heart. Reading used to be something she really enjoyed, took pride in, and loved connecting with people over. On this episode of How To!, co-host Carvell Wallace brings in Maryanne Wolf, director of ⁠UCLA's Center For Dyslexia, Diverse Learners, and Social Justice⁠ and author of the book, ⁠Reader, Come Home⁠. Maryanne explains the science behind the reading brain as well as how to deeply engage with books and make reading a habit again.  If you liked this episode, check out: “⁠How To Put Down Your Phone⁠” Do you wonder how best to use your time? Send us a note at ⁠howto@slate.com⁠ or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mary is juggling a busy career and family life and, like many of us, she feels guilty about the time she spends on her phone. On this episode of How To!, Courtney Martin talks with author and teacher Molly Caro May about how she's helping others rethink—and rewire—their dependency on devices with an approach that's focused on the mind-body connection. If you liked this episode, check out How To Manage Your Kids' Screen Time.  Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Drawing isn't just child's play. It's a shortcut to joy, presence, and connection—all things we could use a lot more of these days. On this episode of How To!, Courtney Martin brings on bestselling illustrator, graphic journalist, and founder of DrawTogether Wendy MacNaughton to explain how everyone at the grown-ups table can start drawing, too.   Courtney's blind contour drawing If you liked this episode check out: How To Be an Artist and Not Starve Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mavi was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis more than 15 years ago. Since then, she's managed her symptoms and myriad life changes—but the past several months have been dominated by intense, chronic pain. On this episode of How To!, Carvell Wallace brings on Toni Bernhard, author of How to Be Sick and How to Live Well With Chronic Pain and Illness, to talk with Mavi about making peace with this new normal. If you liked this episode check out: How To Withstand Pain.  Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jennifer is about to send her oldest child off to college in the fall—and her kid isn't the only one who's anxious about the transition. On this episode of How To!, host Carvell Wallace and Jennifer talk with Christine Self, director of parent and family relations at Texas Tech University, about navigating a huge change, making the most of campus visits, talking about alcohol, and how much access you actually need to your kid's life. Resources mentioned:  You're On Your Own (But I'm Here If You Need Me) by Marjorie Savage College Ready Grown and Flown If you liked this episode check out: How To Take a Gap Year and How To Pick a College (and Actually Afford It). Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jennifer is about to send her oldest child off to college in the fall—and her kid isn't the only one who's anxious about the transition. On this episode of How To!, host Carvell Wallace and Jennifer talk with Christine Self, director of parent and family relations at Texas Tech University, about navigating a huge change, making the most of campus visits, talking about alcohol, and how much access you actually need to your kid's life. Resources mentioned:  You're On Your Own (But I'm Here If You Need Me) by Marjorie Savage College Ready Grown and Flown If you liked this episode check out: How To Take a Gap Year and How To Pick a College (and Actually Afford It). Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jennifer is about to send her oldest child off to college in the fall—and her kid isn't the only one who's anxious about the transition. On this episode of How To!, host Carvell Wallace and Jennifer talk with Christine Self, director of parent and family relations at Texas Tech University, about navigating a huge change, making the most of campus visits, talking about alcohol, and how much access you actually need to your kid's life. Resources mentioned:  You're On Your Own (But I'm Here If You Need Me) by Marjorie Savage College Ready Grown and Flown If you liked this episode check out: How To Take a Gap Year and How To Pick a College (and Actually Afford It). Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Think of all the broken stuff you're storing in your home. A blender that won't blend? A bike without brakes? A buttonless blouse? Resist the urge to buy new stuff—and listen to this How To! episode instead! Courtney Martin brings together Phoebe Schenker, executive director of Reuse Alliance and founder of The Mending Library, and Sue-Jean, a reuse enthusiast, to talk about breathing new life into old items.  Links Mentioned:  Reuse Alliance iFixIt WikiHow Tool Lending Libraries If you liked this episode check out: How To Find the Gems in All Your Junk and How To Let Go of Kid Clutter Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Lily wants to have satisfying sex that plays to her core desires, but lately it's been hard to describe to potential partners exactly what she wants. On this episode of How To!, Carvell Wallace brings on Dr. Danielle Harel and Celeste Hirschman—sexologists, authors, and the founders of the Somatica Institute. They coach Lily (and all of us) on how to define the individual experiences we're seeking—and communicate them to others. If you liked this episode check out:  How To Have the Best Sex of Your Life How To Make Sexual Consent Sexy How To Orgasm How To Lose Your ‘Virginity' at 43 How To Have an Open Relationship Also: Death, Sex & Money's Sex Parties and Shakespeare With Carvell Wallace Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Are you stuck in a hair rut? On this episode of How To!, Courtney Martin brings on Alana Lucia Balestrino, hairstylist, barber, and founder of the Brooklyn-based studio Baddies. Alana explains how to work with a stylist or barber to get a haircut you love.  If you liked this episode check out: How To Dress with Confidence. Also: Decoder Ring's Mystery of the Mullet.  Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

At least 10 percent of parents in the U.S. are disabled, but Andrea can't seem to find parenting advice on disability and accessibility. On this episode of How To!, Carvell Wallace brings on Jessica Slice, author of the new book Unfit Parent: A Disabled Mother Challenges an Inaccessible World, to help Andrea reimagine parenthood.  If you liked this episode check out: How To Date With a Disability and How To Become a Parent Overnight.  Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Our series Living at Odds concludes with a special episode of Slate's Death, Sex & Money. Host Anna Sale returns to her native West Virginia to talk with the state's only full-time lobbyist for LGBTQ rights. Andrew Schneider of Fairness West Virginia has spent years cultivating working relationships with conservative allies in state and local government. Aided by those relationships, Andrew helped pass 20 local anti-discrimination ordinances across the conservative-leaning state. Now, those policy victories—and Andrew's alliances—are facing dire challenges in an increasingly hostile political landscape. Plus: How To!'s Courtney Martin looks back at Living at Odds, a series about what holds us together when so much threatens to break us apart. If you enjoyed this series, check out: How To Get Things Done in a Divided Nation with Samantha Power or How To Harness Your Citizen Superpowers.  Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen. This episode was produced by Anna Sale, with the Death, Sex & Money team: Zoe Azulay, Cameron Drews, Andrew Dunn, and Daisy Rosario. This series was produced by Maura Currie and Rosie Belson. How To's technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer. Special thanks to The Hearthland Foundation, which provided funding for Living at Odds. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In the third installment of our series Living at Odds, How To!'s Courtney Martin examines what it's like being in conflict with your family history. She talks with ancestors of the famous names in Plessy v. Ferguson, the Supreme Court decision that affirmed racial segregation in the U.S. as “separate but equal.” Later, researcher Kellie Farrish explains how reparative genealogy can unlock family history that's been lost or erased—and bring together descendants of enslaved people and their enslavers into conversations about the past, present, and future. If you're enjoying Living at Odds, check out this How To! episode: How To ‘Do the Work' of Racial Justice.  Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen. This episode was produced by Maura Currie and Rosie Belson. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob, who composed original music for this series. Our supervising producer is Joel Meyer. Thank you to Dahlia Lithwick of Amicus and Sophie Summergrad for their help with this episode. Special thanks to The Hearthland Foundation, which provided funding for Living at Odds. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In the second installment of our series Living at Odds, former How To! host Amanda Ripley returns to talk with two public school officials in Tulsa, Oklahoma, who found themselves at loggerheads upon their very first meeting. Deborah and Stacey's difficult working relationship continued until COVID-19 sparked some solidarity—and the two began to learn more about each other. Later, Stacey would find herself defending the colleague she once wanted to oust. If you're enjoying Living at Odds, check out these How To! episodes: How To Build Trust With Co-Workers and How To Help Teachers Thrive. Also check out Good Conflict for additional resources.  Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen. This episode was produced by Rosie Belson and Maura Currie. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob, who composed original music for this series. Our supervising producer is Joel Meyer. Thank you to Sophie Summergrad for her help with this episode. Special thanks to The Hearthland Foundation, which provided funding for Living at Odds. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Living at Odds is a new How To! series about what's holding us together when so much threatens to break us apart. In our first episode, host Courtney Martin talks with two street vendors who operated rivaling merch tents at the same busy intersection during the 2024 election. Steve hawked MAGA caps and Trump-branded pool floaties just a few feet away from Sandra, who sweetened her sales of Harris-Walz campaign shirts with free “Kamala candy.” After so many weeks on the same street corner, the pair negotiated an easy friendship—and even talked about politics. Then came Election Day.   If you're enjoying Living at Odds, check out these How To! episodes: How To Run for Office Without Being an A**hole and How To Talk Politics With Your Dad (Without Yelling) Pt 1 Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen. This episode was produced by Maura Currie and Rosie Belson. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer. Thank you to Sophie Summergrad for her help with this episode. Special thanks to The Hearthland Foundation, which provided funding for this series. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Tesla owners are dumping their vehicles in protest of CEO Elon Musk—and driving down resale prices. On this episode of How To!, Courtney Martin talks with two soon-to-be-former owners—and with Patrick George, editor-in-chief of InsideEVs and co-host of the Plugged-In podcast. Patrick helps them figure out how to sell their Model Ys and find a ride that aligns with their practical and ideological needs.  If you liked this episode check out: How To Cope With Climate Anxiety Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

To some, the act of writing a memoir might seem daunting, invasive, or navel-gazing. But excavating memories, noticing patterns, and revisiting events from other points of view can lead to healing—regardless of whether your work gets published. On this episode of How To!, Carvell Wallace brings on Melissa Febos. Melissa is the bestselling author of five books, including Girlhood—winner of the National Book Critics Circle Award in Criticism—and a forthcoming memoir, The Dry Season. She teaches us how to create our own narrative in ways that are safe for you and empathetic of others.  If you liked this episode check out: Carvell Wallace on Another Word for Love, How To Start Writing (with Anna Quindlen and John Dickerson), and How To Get Your Book Published Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Music streaming services like Spotify offer huge libraries of songs and albums—with recommendation engines that can feel unadventurous and repetitive. On this episode of How To!, Carvell Wallace welcomes online tastemaker and podcast host Derrick Gee to discuss the shortcomings of music streaming algorithms. And, they sit down with R.J. and Brie—two music fans from different generations—to offer up tips for finding hidden gems and obscure jams that might reinvigorate your own music-seeking journey. Recommendations from this episode:   Internet radio: KEXP (Seattle), KALX (UC-Berkeley), NTS Radio (UK), and KVRX, “None of the Hits, All of the Time” (Austin, Texas) Podcasts and online features: Speaks Volumes With Derrick Gee, Bandsplain, NPR's Song of the Day Derrick G's playlists at derrickgee.com. If you liked this episode check out How To Write the Perfect Breakup Song (with special guest Ben Folds).  Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The final installment of our series explores the conversations that most of us dread, like frank discussions of our differences or a negative performance review at work. We often anticipate that these chats will go badly—and end in hurt feelings or embarrassment—but there are proven ways to make them easier to navigate. Host Charles Duhigg talks with psychologist Jay Van Bavel about strategies for having the hardest conversations. And: Vernā Myers, Netflix's former vice president for inclusion strategy, tells the story of what happened inside the company after an executive was fired for using a racial slur.  This Slate miniseries dives into the art and science of meaningful conversations, inspired by Duhigg's bestselling book, Supercommunicators. The guides we mention in this episode can be found at charlesduhigg.com/tools/ Supercommunicators was produced by Sophie Summergrad and Derek John, who also did the sound design. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

For most of her life, Elizabeth was a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, which forbids having sex outside of marriage. But she recently left the Mormon faith, and now she's ready to have sex for the first time—at age 43. On this episode of How To!, Courtney Martin brings on Nicole Hardy, author of Confessions of a Latter-Day Virgin to offer Elizabeth advice that's relevant to anyone who's ready to tap into their sexuality later in life—but unsure how (or where! or with whom!) to start. If you liked this episode check out: How To Orgasm, How To Make Sexual Consent Sexy, and How To Be Free of Body Shame Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Interviews are a time-honored way to elicit intimate insights from public figures and people in power. But at a moment when so much history is being denied or even deleted, interviewing family members and elders can be an important way to document their lives—and understand more about ourselves. On this episode of How To!, Carvell Wallace brings on Sam Fragoso, host of the podcast Talk Easy. Sam explains what he's learned from hundreds of longform celebrity interviews, and how he applied those lessons to sit-downs with his parents. If you liked this episode check out: The Art of the On-Mic Interview or How To Ace an Interview Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen. How To is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Why is it that we can tell someone “I'm totally fine!” and they instantly know we're not? Gestures, facial expressions, tone of voice, and other subtle nonverbal cues play a huge role in how we connect with one another.  In this episode, host Charles Duhigg explores how we communicate without words, including a deep dive into the visual and tonal cues embedded in one of the biggest sitcoms of all time, The Big Bang Theory.  He talks with Dr. Dustin York, a professor at Maryville University who studies nonverbal communication and worked in public relations for Barack Obama's 2008 presidential campaign. He also sits down with Dave Goetsch, a co-executive producer and longtime writer for The Big Bang Theory, and journalist Jessica Radloff, who wrote an exhaustive book about the show.  This Slate miniseries dives into the art and science of meaningful conversations, inspired by Duhigg's bestselling book, Supercommunicators.  Supercommunicators was produced by Sophie Summergrad and Derek John, who also did the sound design. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

May's father nearly lost $4,000 to an online scam. How can she protect him from future fraud? On this episode of How To!, Courtney Martin brings on Kathy Stokes, director of fraud prevention programs at AARP. She also runs their Fraud Watch Network. Kathy helps May rethink how she's talking to her parents about cyber scams—she explains steps that everyone can take to avoid becoming a crime victim. If you or someone you know has been the victim of cyber fraud, you can contact AARP's helpline at 877-908-3360. Liked this episode? heck out: How To Beat Hackers at Their Own Game and How To Steal Back Your Identity Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen. How To's supervising producer is Joel Meyer. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis.  Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Why are some people able to talk with just about anyone—about almost anything? One answer may lie in the questions we ask—and how deeply we ask them. Stick with us here… In this episode, host Charles Duhigg examines why deep questions are so powerful and how to ask them in everyday life. He talks to Nick Epley, psychology professor at the University of Chicago and lifelong researcher of deep questions. And we catch up with Mandy Len Catron, 10 years after she wrote the viral New York Times article “The 36 Questions That Lead to Love.” This Slate miniseries dives into the art and science of meaningful conversations, inspired by Duhigg's bestselling book, Supercommunicators.  Supercommunicators was produced by Derek John and Sophie Summergrad.  Our technical director is Merritt Jacob.  Joel Meyer is our supervising producer. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In a new miniseries inspired by Charles Duhigg's bestseller, the former host of Slate's How To! podcast sits down with psychologists, social scientists, and even a Hollywood writer to explore how to ask the right questions, communicate without words, and find meaningful connections in our lives. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

At nearly 40, Valerie is itching to pay off her student loans and finally become debt-free. But… how? On this episode of How To!, Carvell Wallace brings on Yanely Espinal, financial educator, author of Mind Your Money, and host of the Marketplace podcast Financially Inclined. Yanely breaks down the best ways to pay off your education debt without putting the rest of your life on hiatus.  If you liked this episode check out: How To Make a Big Purchase Without Panicking Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen. How To's executive producer is Derek John. Joel Meyer is our senior editor/producer. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis.  Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ever since she started taking a new medication a few years ago, Meme is worried that she's lost her sex drive. She still has a great relationship with her husband, but she isn't interested in sex the way that she used to be, and she's worried it's hurting her marriage. On this episode of How To!, we bring on sex educator Emily Nagoski, author of Come as You Are, to coach Meme through how to revamp her sex life. For busy couples, you should actually schedule a time on your calendar to be intimate. “Think of like when you were dating…that was date sex,” Emily reminds us. She then breaks down the myths that so many of us have internalized about sex, and shares surprising tips to help anyone—no matter their age or relationship status—have better sex. If you liked this episode, check out: “How To Save Your Marriage.” Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen. Podcast production by Derek John, Rachael Allen, and Rosemary Belson. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jeff and his family lost their home last month in the L.A. wildfires. Since then, he's been hyperfocused on insurance claims, an epic to-do list, and finding a “temporary” place to live for the next several years. But Jeff hasn't experienced the emotional punch of the devastation yet. In fact… he just feels numb. On this episode of How To!, Courtney Martin brings on Laurel Braitman, author of What Looks Like Bravery: An Epic Journey Through Loss to Love. In a moving (and sometimes funny) conversation, Laurel tells Jeff how she's still processing what she lost in a 2017 wildfire, and they talk about the heartbreak, grief—and glimmers of hope—that follow the sudden loss of your family's home. Artwork mentioned: It's Going Down Like a House on Fire by Nyx Coker. https://compote.slate.com/images/59305637-0bdb-492c-9734-39addc8f11b6.jpeg If you liked this episode check out: How To Survive a Disaster. Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen. How To's executive producer is Derek John. Joel Meyer is our senior editor/producer. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Guillermo and his ex-wife divorced nearly a decade ago. They share custody of their son which, Guillermo says, lets her continue meddling in his life. He recently started dating someone and it's getting serious, but he's worried that his ex is going to destroy his new relationship. On this episode of How To!, Carvell Wallace brings on Bill Eddy, author and co-founder of the High Conflict Institute. Bill explains how to set limits and impose consequences in truly difficult situations to preserve your peace of mind and foster happiness. If you liked this episode check out: How To Do Divorce Right and How To Save a Friend from a Bad Relationship Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen. How To's executive producer is Derek John. Joel Meyer is our senior editor/producer. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis.  Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Connie is feeling compelled to get involved in her local community, but she's never even attended a PTA meeting. On this episode of How To!, Courtney Martin enlists Eric Liu of Citizen University to explain how busy parents, introverts, and first-timers like Connie can test the waters of civic engagement in the Trump 2.0 era—without getting sucked under.  Eric is the author of You're More Powerful Than You Think: A Citizen's Guide to Making Change Happen. If you liked this episode, check out our companion episode, How To Become an Expat, or this recent conversation: How To Lead Your Local Nonprofit.  For an upcoming episode, we want to hear from listeners affected by the disastrous wildfires in the Los Angeles area. If you're able to do so during this stressful time, tell us about the questions and challenges you're facing as you rebuild your home and your life. Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001.  How To's executive producer is Derek John. Joel Meyer is our senior editor/producer. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

For three decades, Mike has worked in a field with an uncertain future: journalism. He loves the stability of his current job mentoring student reporters, but he can't stop thinking about starting a new career—in his 50s—in astrophysics, architecture, or law. On this episode of How To!, co-host Courtney Martin enlists career coach and psychologist Dr. Dawn Graham to help Mike think through his midlife career crisis, especially his urge to go back to school.  Dawn's book is Switchers: How Smart Professionals Change Careers—and Seize Success. If you liked this episode check out: Find a New Career Before It's Too Late and How To Advance Your Career By Quitting Your Job. Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen. How To's executive producer is Derek John. Joel Meyer is our senior editor/producer. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Before the 2024 election, Maureen and Jayna had hoped to attend a historic inauguration for Kamala Harris in Washington, D.C. But when Donald Trump won the presidency, the lesbian couple scrapped their trip—and booked a fact-finding mission to Portugal instead. On this episode of How To!, they talk with co-host Carvell Wallace about their plans to leave the U.S.—and start a new life somewhere they'll feel safer. And, Jen Barnett of Expatsi offers up advice about Portugal and other LGBTQ+ friendly countries, the implications for taxes and international travel (including return trips to the States), and what expat-curious listeners need to know about raising kids, voting, EU citizenship—and how to take the first step. Links Mentioned:  The Expatsi Test Mindful Migrant on TikTok If you liked this episode check out: How To Uproot Your Life and How To Live Anywhere in the World. Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen. How To's executive producer is Derek John. Joel Meyer is our senior editor/producer. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today we're going to see if one American family can flip the usual, tortured and tedious script for arguing about politics and do something more interesting. Jenn and Todd Brandel sit down with their dad, Bruce, to see if they can come to a better understanding about what has shaped their different political views. Mónica Guzmán, senior fellow for public practice at Braver Angels and author of I Never Thought Of It That Way: How To Have Fearlessly Curious Conversations in Dangerously Divided Times, is back to provide some insightful post-game analysis. In this second episode of our special two-part series, she breaks down what went well, what got a little messy, and what we can all apply to our own conversations with loved ones.  Listen to the first part of our series: “How To Talk Politics With Your Dad (Without Yelling) Pt 1” If you liked this episode, you might also like: “How To Rescue Someone From a Conspiracy Theory.” Do you have a question without an answer? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jenn and Todd Brandel have a close, loving relationship with their father, Bruce. But one thing makes their blood boil: his political chain emails. The messages are often forwarded commentary written in a provocative tone, and are an unwelcome reminder of just how far apart the family is politically. On this episode of How To!, we're joined by Mónica Guzmán, senior fellow for public practice at Braver Angels and author of I Never Thought Of It That Way: How To Have Fearlessly Curious Conversations in Dangerously Divided Times. In the first of a special two-part episode on talking politics with our parents, Mónica teaches Jenn and Todd how to aim for understanding with their dad, not agreement. Next week, Jenn, Todd, and their dad Bruce will put these tips into practice—on mic—around the kitchen table, as Mónica provides post-game analysis. We'll dive into what worked, what got a little messy, and how to keep making progress. If you liked this episode, check out: “How To Embrace Your Anti-Vax Family This Holiday Season” and “How To Talk Politics Without Wrecking Relationships.” Do you have a question without an answer? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

How will you remember 2024? Here at How To! Headquarters, this will be the year when a bunch of very smart and insightful guests taught us how to flirt with confidence, be a mindful drinker, make bank at a yard sale, and cope with forever parenting. On this episode, co-hosts Carvell Wallace and Courtney Martin break down their favorite advice of the year and share some heart-warming updates from listeners who joined us on the show. Did we forget to mention your favorite advice of the year? Let us know with a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen. How To's executive producer is Derek John. Joel Meyer is our senior editor/producer. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis and Sara McCrea. Psst! Slate Plus members can listen to a special year-end bonus episode with Carvell and Courtney's recommendations for books, films, and Substacks. Not a member? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Sandy is a former college athlete who knows how to exercise—at least, she used to. These days, she's feeling lost without a coach, a workout plan, or much free time. On this episode of How To!, Carvell Wallace brings on Danielle Friedman, author of Let's Get Physical and a contributor to the New York Times Well section. Danielle explains how to embrace movement that you love, make it fit into your life—and actually stick with it.  If you liked this episode check out: How To Start Strength Training and How To Stick to Your New Year's Resolutions. Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen. How To's executive producer is Derek John. Joel Meyer is our senior editor/producer. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis and Sara McCrea. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

André has known for years that they have to execute the estate when their parents pass. They feel wholly unprepared for the task, especially since their parents are reluctant to share any important information. On this episode of How To!: Carvell Wallace brings on M.P. Dunleavey, journalist, author of the Squished Substack, and contributor to Next Avenue where she covers aging, caregiving, and money. M.P. walks André through the important paperwork that needs to be in place and gives them guidance for working with stubborn family members.  Additional resources:  M.P.'s follow-up story on Next Avenue Area Agencies on Aging Benefits check up Estate planning checklist Creating a financial roadmap Easing family burdens Writing a will If you liked this episode check out: How To Care for an Aging Parent and How To Make Aging Easier for Everyone Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen. How To's executive producer is Derek John. Joel Meyer is our senior editor/producer. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis and Sara McCrea. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

‘Tis the season of gathering with friends and family. It's also a time where some of us yearn for a closer community, like this week's listener. Morgan is looking for a way to hang out with friends in a consistent, meaningful manner. On this episode of How To!, Priya Parker, author of The Art of Gathering, explains how to transform a lackluster hang-out where people just sit around drinking beer into a party with a purpose where guests want to come back. She tells us how to create an event that meets a need with the right rules and the right guest list. She even has tips for sprucing up your next holiday party.  If you liked this episode, check out: How To Cook One Perfect Meal. Do you have a question without an answer? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen. Podcast production by Derek John, Rosemary Belson, and Kevin Bendis.   Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ezra is adrift in his early 20s. He craves a life of meaning, community, and love. But he's struggling to find those things in a world that seems increasingly uncertain and discouraging for young people. On this existential episode of How To!, Courtney Martin brings in Andrew McPeak, author, podcast host, and vice president of Growing Leaders. He tackles Ezra's big questions and explains how Gen Z (and everyone else) can make life more meaningful.  If you liked this episode check out: How To Keep Caring Amid Endless Crises Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen. How To's executive producer is Derek John. Joel Meyer is our senior editor/producer. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis and Sara McCrea. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Contraception is a huge burden for women and people with uteruses to bear. What would it look like—on a personal, cultural, and medical level—if more men took on that responsibility? Today on How To!, a conversation about gender equity for reproductive care, from changes in sexual education to more accessible vasectomies to the development of new contraception methods. Carvell Wallace welcomes two guests: Dr. Sarah Miller, a board-certified family physician and family planning specialist at Northeast Vasectomy and Family Planning, where she provides many vasectomies. And: Dr. Brian Nguyen, associate professor of clinical obstetrics and gynecology at the University of Southern California, sub-investigator for a network of male-contraceptive clinical trials, and director of The EMERGE Lab.  If you liked this episode check out: How To Make Sexual Consent Sexy and How To Orgasm. Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen. How To's executive producer is Derek John. Joel Meyer is our senior editor/producer. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. Want more How To!? Subscribe to Slate Plus to unlock exclusive bonus episodes. Plus, you'll access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of the How To! show page. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices