Reflections on the Road to Respect

It is five years since this post came out in February 2010 and in that time, the “speak up” piece of the Respect Business continued to expand and grow. It became the most popular and requested of my presentations. In 2012 we released the Road to Respect Speak Up eGuide with tips and tools to empower you to speak up respectfully.The ability to speak up respectfully, the willingness to step into our power, to be our own advocate is the ultimate answer to ending workplace disrespect. A simple solution. Alas, as I have learned over the past 15 years, also something the majority of us are often unwilling to risk doing. Fear of confrontation is mighty powerful. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

This post first appeared in Nov 2011. The message is even more relevant today as the explosion of social media platforms, texting and selfies continues to push the boundaries and re-establish “socially acceptable behaviour.”In my experience, the bar is getting lower, not higher, making the requirement for a proactive conversation about what constitutes “respectful, professional behaviour” in your workplace more critical than ever. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Given that Ms. Clinton announced on April 12th that she will be seeking the Democratic nomination for President of the United States, I thought it would be fitting to share this post from 2013.In June I had the opportunity to present at the annual SHRM Conference in Chicago. One of the highlights Iof that experience was being in the audience for the opening keynote delivered by former US Secretary of State Hilary Rodham Clinton.If you’re a regular reader/listener, you will know that the topic of Women, Position & Power is one that I have been increasingly focused on over the last couple of years. I’ve been sharing interviews I have been conducting with local women in the C-suite. Our October post will feature Sue Paisch, former managing partner of Fasken DuMoullin, now CEO of Lifelabs.Forbes magazine recently ranked Ms. Clinton 5th on their 100 most powerful women list. The magazine selects women who “go beyond the traditional taxonomy of the power elite (political and economic might). These change-agents are actually shifting our very idea of clout and authority and, in the process, transforming the world in fresh and exhilarating ways.” See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

March 8 was International Women’s Day, first celebrated in 1911. It seems only fitting, then, that this month’s "Best of "article features the first interview for Are We There Yet? Women, Position & Power done in February 2012. The introduction to the interview highlighted the sad reality that the answer to the question Are We There Yet? was a resounding NO in 2012. I wish I could say something has shifted in the last 3 years, but the fact is that it hasn’t. Unless something radical happens, my 18 year old daughter will not enjoy pay equity, or equality of opportunity in her lifetime, nor will any daughters she may have. The International Women’s Day theme this year is Make it Happen. The good news in this story is that since I started this series, this conversation has gained a lot of momentum. Let’s keep the momentum going, and use our collective energy, power and will to Make Equality Happen for women and girls in our world community in our lifetime. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

This is the full interview with Anne Kinvig See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

I was prompted to write this article in June 2007 when Jim Chu became the first non-white chief of police to be hired in Canada. In January 2015 Chief Chu announced he will be retiring in the spring, after 36 years as a member of the Vancouver Police Force. Oh, and if you’re curious as to who are the front runners for his position, they are 3 white guys. Plus ca change… See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

In July 2007, my 11 year old daughter Abee and I went to San Diego where I attended a National Speakers Association event while my daughter took part in a Youth Leadership Conference. At the end of each day, my daughter was bubbling over with news about the exciting speakers she had heard.One of these presenters, Canadian motivational speaker Alvin Law, had made a huge impression on Abee. Born without arms in the early 1960’s, Alvin was one of the unfortunate group of “Thalidomide” babies. Doctors advised his birth parents that Alvin, being so severely deformed, was doomed to a life of hardship and limitation. Alvin was given up for adoption. Happily for him, his first foster family took a different perspective on Alvin’s potential. They chose to focus on the “ability” in disability - long before that concept became mainstream. Alvin’s foster parents encouraged him to use his feet as hands. That first night, my daughter couldn’t wait to recount all the amazing things Alvin can do that we can’t. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

One of the most gratifying things for me, and the main reason I continue to write these monthly articles, is that I always receive comments from you, my readers and listeners. A Christmukah Story, first posted in December 2007, generated a flood of feedback. We reposted it in 2009 and 2012 and again got loads of comments. The article has also been picked up and reprinted in numerous online publications. It remains my most popular post to date.As you many of you are new subscribers to Reflections on the Road to Respect, I have decided to share this article again this year. I am so grateful to each and every one of you that has chosen to become a member of the Road to Respect community. It has been my joy to get to know you, to work with you, and to serve you. You inspire me to continue working to ignite the respect conversation.Wishing you and those you cherish, respect, love, good health andpeace for the holiday season and the New Year. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Yesterday I spent a good deal of my day struggling with an article for this edition of Reflections on the Road to Respect. I had what I thought was a good idea. However, as sometimes happens, the more I wrote, the less I progressed. By about 4 pm I was feeling quite frustrated and discouraged. The fact that I burned the roof of my mouth a few days ago and have not been able to eat, something I normally quite enjoy doing, did not help my mood any. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Let’s Talk About Sex – Popular Fashion and Respectful Workplace CultureI am not a prude. Those that know me would laugh at the suggestion. However, lately I find myself on the far right when it comes to the topic of appropriate attire in the workplace. I am, in fact, now advising all of my clients to adopt and enforce a Dress Code.How come? Well, quite honestly, I often find myself in a difficult position these days. More than once, I have arrived at the corporate offices of a client with whom I am working to promote respectful workplace culture (the cornerstone of which is a workplace free from discrimination and harassment), and the first thing I see is … cleavage. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

The Best of EricaHope you’ve enjoyed our brief but glorious summer season. Out here on the “Left” coast we had an unusually hot and somewhat humid summer, making me exceeding grateful that I chose to install central air when I moved into my home.By the time you read this, I will be on the other coast, visiting family and friends in Montreal and Toronto after helping my daughter get settled in the room in residence that will be her home for the next few months.I officially started my sabbatical on August 1st. What I have noticed thus far is how challenging it can be to live an unstructured life; to do what I feel like doing rather than what I “should” be doing; to focus on being rather than doing; to be “unproductive” rather than checking things off the ever expanding to do list.One of final tasks on my list was to select the “best of” Reflections on the Road to Respect posts for the fall distribution dates. This month I am sharing the very first enews article I wrote back in March 2006.What struck me upon re-reading this post was how consistent my core message has remained over the years. I was somewhat surprised as I had thought that my earlier posts might no longer be relevant. For me the publication of Road to Respect in 2009 marks the major turning point, or shift in my business. That was when I really started focusing, and talking about values and culture, or so I thought. In fact, what I have discovered is that the themes developed in Road to Respect: Path to Profit are evident in this very first post. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

August 2014 will mark the 16th anniversary of The Respect Business. A lot has happened in those 16 years. When I started this business in 1998 I was still “young.” “You are no longer young by the time you realize your youth is over.” I’m not sure where I heard this expression or who said it, however, it has stuck with me over the years. There can be no doubt that my youth, along with numerous other life stages, is now over. I am firmly ensconced in middle age, rushing, it feels, towards becoming a senior citizen. While I resonate with the word elder, being a senior conjures up visions of gumming my food as I drool and mutter incoherently. A bit extreme maybe, but I’ve never been one of those middle of the road kind of people. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

In May 2012 I participated as a community leader in the Minerva Foundation’s Learning to Lead weekend. Jen Schaeffers, executive director of the CKNW Orphans’ Fund was the Keynote speaker on Sunday morning. What struck me about this young, energetic, and at that time pregnant woman, was her willingness to talk openly about the challenges she was facing as a working mom, a particularly relevant message given that a third of the audience were Grade 11 girls.It is important to remember that this was before Sheryl Sandberg created a forum for this conversation with the release of her book ‘Lean In.’ My experience is that far too many women choose to stay silent with respect to how hard integrating family, life and leadership actually is. After hearing Mrs. Schaeffers, I knew she was someone I was interested in getting to know and at some point, featuring in this series. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

In May 2012 I participated as a community leader in the Minerva Foundation’s Learning to Lead weekend. Jen Schaeffers, executive director of the CKNW Orphans’ Fund was the Keynote speaker on Sunday morning. What struck me about this young, energetic, and at that time pregnant woman, was her willingness to talk openly about the challenges she was facing as a working mom, a particularly relevant message given that a third of the audience were Grade 11 girls.It is important to remember that this was before Sheryl Sandberg created a forum for this conversation with the release of her book ‘Lean In.’ My experience is that far too many women choose to stay silent with respect to how hard integrating family, life and leadership actually is. After hearing Mrs. Schaeffers, I knew she was someone I was interested in getting to know and at some point, featuring in this series. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

My 17 year old daughter was thrilled when she recently started her new job. She liked the work and the people, at least everyone she met until her shift last week. She made a couple of mistakes, she told me, and was “called on them” by two supervisors.Her immediate reaction was to feel anxiety, shame, and worry. Her confidence was momentarily shaken she said. She started to feel badly about herself. She started wondering if she really liked her job as much as she had originally thought. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Are We There Yet? - Women, Power & Position - An Interview with Janet AustinJanet Austin was recommended as someone to interview for this series by a number of former participants. In addition to being the CEO of the YMCA Metro Vancouver, “one of the largest and most diversified non-profits in Metro Vancouver, if not the whole country” Ms. Austin is the incoming Chair of the Vancouver Board of Trade and serves on the Board of the Canadian Pediatric Society, Big Sisters BC and the Telus Community Board, among others. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Are We There Yet? - Women, Power & Position - An Interview with Janet AustinJanet Austin was recommended as someone to interview for this series by a number of former participants. In addition to being the CEO of the YMCA Metro Vancouver, “one of the largest and most diversified non-profits in Metro Vancouver, if not the whole country” Ms. Austin is the incoming Chair of the Vancouver Board of Trade and serves on the Board of the Canadian Pediatric Society, Big Sisters BC and the Telus Community Board, among others. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

The Elephant in the RoomIn 1998 I quit my corporate job to start the Respect Business. When people asked me why I made that choice my standard response was:I want to see change in my lifetime.Sheryl Sandberg, Facebook COO and author of the bestselling book Lean In, shares that interest. She is working to challenge the status quo with respect to gender inequality. Like many of us, women and men alike, she envisages a world where women can live life on their own terms.A pivotal point in her journey occurred in 2010 when she was asked to speak at TED Women on the topic of women and leadership. She arrived in Washington prepared to deliver a well-researched, unemotional speech “chock full of facts and figures.”As she stood backstage Pat Mitchell, CEO of the Paley Centre for Media and co-producer of the conference, asked how she was feeling.Rather than make a choice many of us do and say ‘oh fine,’ Ms. Sandberg disclosed that she was having a hard day. Her 3 year old daughter had been clinging to her leg crying Mommy don’t go, when she had dropped her off at daycare before heading to the airport. She was wracked with guilt.This is an experience all too common for scores of working Mothers. Many days I would tear myself away as the child care workers took my screaming daughter out of my arms. The first thing I would do upon arrival at my office would be to call the daycare to see if my daughter had stopped crying.“You have to share that story.” Ms. Mitchell advised.Ms. Sandberg was stunned. “Are you kidding?” she replied “On the TED stage?” See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

One of my great joys in life is reading novels. Call me old fashioned, but I prefer reading a physical book rather than an e-book. I bike to my local library, and head straight to the staff picks section where I consistently find great reads. Given the recent announcement about the phasing out of mail delivery to private homes in Canada, I no longer take the gift of a public library for granted. As I scan the barcodes I always feel grateful to have access to these wonderful books.On my last visit to the library for some reason I was compelled to turn left and peruse the shelf with the non-fiction staff picks. I immediately noticed “Who Says It’s a Man’s World – The Girls’ Guide to Corporate Domination,” by Emily Bennington. As a member of the Road to Respect™ community, you know a book with a title like that would be irresistible to me.Who Says it’s a Man’s World is worth reading for a whole host of reasons, not the least of which is Ms. Bennington’s straightforward and witty writing style. I love the title of chapter 7: Seriously, Don’t Bring Sexy Back. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

For many of us December means holiday preparations and celebrations. For me, it has also come to mean the rather demoralizing task of having to read story after story of disrespect and abuse Now you might be wondering, Erica: why on earth would you want to subject yourself to such a depressing task during the season of light and joy? The short answer is that I am a panel member charged with the task of ranking America’s worst leaders for the eBossWatch America’s Worst Bosses LIST.Our task as panel members is to read through the hundred or so cases of leaders who harass and bully those they are hired to lead, and rank them from 1 – 10: 1 being worst, 10 being the best.Let me be clear here. When I say best, I don’t actually mean best as in good; I mean best as in the least awful.I have to tell you this is a challenging task. I can’t help being reminded of something Woody Allen said in the movie Annie Hall.“I feel that life is divided into the horrible and the miserable. That's the two categories. The horrible are like, I don't know, terminal cases, you know, and blind people, crippled. I don't know how they get through life. It's amazing to me. And the miserable is everyone else."I am always tempted to rank every boss with a 1, but I don’t. I look at the overall fact set and choose between the horrible and the miserable.Whatever the ranking one commonality in these cases is abuse of power by those in positions of power. Another commonality is that the targets are overwhelmingly women, members of visible minorities or LGBT individuals. The most aggravating commonality is that when targets chose to speak up, they are either ignored or retaliated against.It is maddeningly obvious that far too many leaders either fail to appreciate or choose to ignore the respectful, common sense advice shared in our October interview with Sue Paish, CEO of LifeLabs -“Model the behaviour. If you see inappropriate behaviour you better make sure you act on it because people will be watching.”As depressing a task as it is, I choose to remain a part of this panel because I support the work of individuals like Asher Adelman, founder of eBossWatch. His goal is to empower job seekers with information about potential workplaces and what it's really like to work there. As I learned when I interviewed Asher a number of years ago, it was his first-hand, nightmare experience of working in a hostile work environment that inspired him to find a way for people to evaluate prospective employers and avoid bad bosses.Being a panel member affirms for me why I am in the Respect Business. Like Asher, I want individuals to be empowered to choose respect rather than disrespect. I want us to use our collective power to create change by saying no to abusive bosses and disrespectful workplace cultures.It struck me as an interesting coincidence that on the same day I was ranking abusive leaders, the world had gathered to say farewell to Nelson Mandela, a leader who personified what it means to "Model the Behaviour" and to walk the talk of respect.Mandela once said that he felt “morally obliged” to do what he did in his life. While it can be argued that there are vast differences in how individuals interpret morality, our values are the foundation for acts and behaviours which can be described as moral obligations.I believe that we can get some clear insights as to the values that inspired Mandela’s moral obligation from this quote:“No one person is born hating another person because of the colour of his skin, or his background, or his religion. People must learn to hate, and if they can learn to hate they can be taught to love, for love comes more naturally to the human heart than its opposite.”The values of love, joy, peace, respect and compassion are the values of enlightenment. When we align our behaviour with these values, we manifest our divine destiny; our soul’s purpose. It is no coi See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

I noticed an older gentleman among the audience members waiting to speak to me after a recent conference presentation. When the room had cleared, he asked if I had a few extra minutes to talk with him.Turns out that the information in my presentation confirmed for him that he was being bullied at work. The perpetrator was a new hire who had become his supervisor.His was an all too familiar story. He had enjoyed a wonderful career with his current organization and was nearing retirement. He’d never had any issues with anyone he worked with and had no idea what he had done to cause this problem. Although he was working ever harder, trying to be an asset to the team, whatever he did, his new boss found fault with him. It was a litany of criticism, humiliation, insults and abuse.He wanted to resolve the situation. He had spoken to her on several occasions. That only seemed to make it worse.The stress of trying to deal with this for a number of months was taking a toll on his emotional and physical health. He was constantly nervous and anxious at work. He admitted, somewhat shamefully, that he was afraid to be in an office alone with her.As I listened I felt the usual swell of emotions: sadness, frustration and anger. It is absolutely tragic to witness a grown man with tears in his eyes, upset, distraught and confused because of something that is happening to him at work. What gets me angry is that the cause of this tragedy is something that is not only completely avoidable but given the passage of Bill 14 on July 1, 2012, is also contrary to occupational health and safety (OH&S) regulations in BC.My blood started boiling when I learned that his new supervisor had been hired only months ago. Bill 14 was enforced on January 1, 2013. The employer community was expected to be compliant with the three OH&S policies the Board approved to clarify the role of employers, supervisors and workers in the prevention of workplace bullying and harassment by November 1, 2013. The topic of bullying, harassment and respectful workplace has been a hot topic in the employer community for months.The language in those OH&S policies is clear. “A supervisor’s obligation to ensure health and safety of workers includes:Not engaging in bullying and harassment of workers…While I get the fact that our legal environment encourages us to be reactive – to wait until a complaint is filed and then deal with it, being proactive is the only sensible choice for any employer interested in creating a workplace that will attract and retain great employees and build high performing, cohesive teams.If you are interested in being compliant with the new law in BC, start by shifting from being reactive to proactive. Adopt strategies that will bully proof your workplace. Here are 3 hot tips to get you started on the Road to Respect™.Hot Tip #1 – Get curious about your hiring practices.“Hire for attitude, train for skill.”I heard this phrase when I interviewed Ellen du Bellay, Senior VP, Executive Office Operations, Four Seasons Hotels and Resorts, for Road to Respect. “ We hire for attitude, then train for skill,” she said. “We are always looking for someone who is nice.”It really is a no brainer. It is a lot easier to train someone on skill based competencies than it is to train someone on attitudinal competencies. Unfortunately, far too many employers focus on technical qualifications in hiring interviews. If you want to bully proof your workplace, start focusing on behavioural qualifications. Integrate those into your hiring practices. Hire people that will be respectful in their treatment of others.Hot Tip #2 – Get curious about workplace relationships. “The Employment Deal”Bill 14 expands the notion of workplace hazards in employment beyond the traditional physical, ergonomic hazards to include behavioural hazards. Workplace harassment and bullying are behaviours that ar See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Something I learned in short order when I started my career as a Labour Relations Advisor at Canadian Airlines was that lawyer Sue Paish, and her colleagues Patricia Janzen and Lorene Novakowski at Russell and DuMoulin, as the firm was then called, were women I wanted to get to know. I heard them speak at numerous Labour, Employment and Human Rights conferences. I read the book Ms. Paish co-authored; - Act Don’t React – Dealing with Sexual Harassment in Your Organization. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Something I learned in short order when I started my career as a Labour Relations Advisor at Canadian Airlines was that lawyer Sue Paish, and her colleagues Patricia Janzen and Lorene Novakowski at Russell and DuMoulin, as the firm was then called, were women I wanted to get to know. I heard them speak at numerous Labour, Employment and Human Rights conferences. I read the book Ms. Paish co-authored; - Act Don’t React – Dealing with Sexual Harassment in Your Organization. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Hilary Rodham Clinton — Leadership LessonsIn June I had the opportunity to present at the annual SHRM conference in Chicago. One of the highlights of that experience was being in the audience for the opening keynote delivered by former US Secretary of State Hilary Rodham Clinton.If you’re a regular reader/listener, you will know that the topic of Women, Position & Power is one that I have been increasingly focused on over the last couple of years. Our October post will feature Sue Paisch, former managing partner of Fasken DuMoullin, now CEO of Lifelabs.Forbes magazine recently ranked Ms. Clinton 5th on their 100 most powerful women list. The magazine selects women who “go beyond the traditional taxonomy of the power elite (political and economic might). These change-agents are actually shifting our very idea of clout and authority and, in the process, transforming the world in fresh and exhilarating ways.”At the outset of her keynote Ms. Clinton told her audience of HR professionals that “there is no more important asset than the people you work with.” She reinforced that concept in sharing five key leadership lessons illustrated with stories from her time as Secretary of State from 2009 to February 2013.1 – “Good decisions are based on evidence and not ideology.”Ms. Clinton chose the issue of gender equality to illustrate this principle. Many countries, including the US, are jeopardizing both economic growth and productivity because of customs and/or practices that keep women from fully participating at work. Beyond being “just the right thing to do” educating women and girls has been shown empirically to be an economic driver. Using the US to emphasize the relevance of the issue, Ms. Clinton stated that GDP would increase by an estimated 9 % if all the barriers to women in the US were removed.2 – “Leadership is a team sport.” One’s success as a leader is measured by “how well you can get people to work together.” Ms. Clinton said that numerous individuals asked her how she could accept the position of Secretary of State working with President Barak Obama when they had been rivals for the leadership of the Democratic party. She stated that both she and President Obama were interested in “putting the common good ahead of our personal competition.” That shared interest allowed them to go from “a team of rivals to an unrivalled team.”3 – “You can’t win if you don’t show up.” Ms. Clinton quoted filmmaker and actor Woody Allen who once said “80% of life is showing up.” It was this concept that motivated her to visit 112 countries during her tenure as Secretary of State. One of these was the West African country of Togo. Her reason for going was to build relationship, something Ms. Clinton cited as critical for leaders. While she often faced challenges, she continued to “show up,” focusing on being welcoming, listening (another essential leadership skill) and gathering “clues” that would assist her in developing relationship in spite of the myriad of difference she encountered, in Togo and elsewhere. “ It is not always easy but you do have to show up.”4 – “A whisper can be louder than a shout.” Resolving concerns and conflicts often requires what Ms. Clinton referred to as “quiet diplomacy.” She shared a story of being in Saudi Arabia and learning about an 8 year old girl who was being forced to marry a 50 year old for monetary reasons. As was customary when Ms. Clinton was travelling, there was a lot of American press around who were quick to pick up the story. Rather than use the Press to pressure those in positions of power to take action, Ms. Clinton focused on finding a way to fix the situation and still allow public officials to “save face.” She chose to have a number of “quiet conversations” where her message was “please fix this and we won't say anything publicly.” The real success in such situations, stated Ms. Clinton, is to find a way to resolve the situation or conflict while working to enhance or build See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Throughout the 3 day event, Ms. Sasevich showed us, gave us examples of, and shared ideas about what might be possible for us in our businesses. On the trip home, as I imagined all of the new products, strategies and initiatives I could develop and implement to support growth in my business, I began to appreciate how transformative it can be when one is really open to what might be possible, when one chooses to believe that a certain outcome can in fact happen. It occurred to me that Ms. Sasevich had allowed me to discover the Power of Possibility. I noticed during the event that I have all kinds of defense mechanisms, excuses and reasons that are almost like auto-responders – that won’t work for me because…, I can’t do that because…. At some point during those 3 days I started getting curious about those auto-responders. I realized that in fact those were simply excuses that allowed me to avoid stepping out of my comfort zone, taking a risk, playing bigger, increasing my sphere of influence and achieving a greater level of success. I realized that these auto-responders supported a whole host of beliefs around what I thought might be possible for me. I realized that accepting the possibility of any outcome is the first step to achieving that outcome. Now of course, one might not achieve it. Possibility is not probability. It is not certainty. However it is more than hope. Hoping that something can be achieved is very different from accepting the possibility that something can be achieved. Possibility speaks to vision, to imagination, to belief, to faith and intention. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Work related stress is now the leading cause of workplace disability, costing the Canadian economy close to $5 billion a year. Doing more with less is the mantra in many of today`s workplaces. Change is the name of the game. Given those realities, the likelihood that work related stress is going to end anytime soon is slim to none.So what`s an employer to do?How about offering a weekly, 30 minute meditation class?Wendy Quan, Organizational Change Manager at Pacific Blue Cross has been leading a weekly meditation class for her colleagues for the past 2 years. The class has grown from 12 attendees to over 150. And it is producing tangible results. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

This is the full interview with Wendy Quan. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Have you given much thought to the notion of behavioural accountability in your workplace?We often hear about the importance of holding employees accountable.  That expression seems to imply that something, or more commonly, someone external to that employee, is responsible for ensuring that an employee lives up to her/his end of the employment contract.  It expresses a cultural norm with respect to power and empowerment within an organization.I would also argue that it speaks to a reactive, rather than a proactive norm within an organization.  It often means that those in positions of hierarchical power, managers and supervisors, (individuals I prefer to refer to as workplace leaders), are charged with a responsibility of monitoring or overseeing what others are doing.  When those “others” make a mistake, when they fail to do something that they are supposed to, the leader has to “hold them accountable.”Most of the time that means some sort of punitive or disciplinary response, with a threat of more severe work related consequences if the mistake, problem, or error is not corrected.  An unintended consequence of this approach is that often the only time an employee meets with her/his leader is when that leader needs to “hold her/him accountable,” to point out what she/he is doing wrong and make sure she/he knows that it better not happen again. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

I had the opportunity to meet Janine North, CEO Northern Development Initiative Trust when I attended the 4th Annual Leadership Lessons from Influential Women in Business conference co-hosted by Business in Vancouver and the Professional Women’s Network on November 1, 2012. After hearing her speak as a panel member, I knew I wanted to include her in this series. I would describe Ms. North as a respectful, heart-centered leader. Her calm, focused and confident energy permeated our conversation. I left my recent interview with Ms. North feeling reflective and inspired. She is the kind of leader I aspire to be.Here are the highlights of our conversation. I invite you to listen to the podcast and hear the entire interview. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

One of the main reasons I chose the title Road to Respect for my book was to emphasize the journey involved in creating a values based, respectful workplace culture. This is not about a quick trip with a speedy arrival at your destination. Aligning your workplace policies, behaviours and practices to reflect the ethical value of respect can take years.That kind of organizational journey requires commitment from senior leadership. According to Issy Sharp, founder of Four Seasons Hotels and Resorts and innovator of its award winning Golden Rule Culture 20182018Enforcing our credo was the hardest part.201D As I heard from Four Season2019s Ellen du Bellay, SVP Learning and Development that Gold Star Employer of Choice culture has been 201C40 years in the making.201D This is not a sprint 2013 it2019s a marathon. It2019s about commitment for the long haul. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

It2019s a New Year, a time when many of us are making resolutions. If attracting and retaining top talent, and/or achieving sustainable business success are goals you2019ve set for 2013, I2019d like to suggest that you add Creating a Culture of Respect to your list. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

I didn2019t grow up celebrating Christmas. It was 201Ctheir201D holiday. It wasn2019t until I met my late husband that I experienced the 201Cmagic201D of Christmas; the amazing smell of a living tree, the fun of decorating, the comfort of lights on dark winter evenings, the eggnog, the gingerbread and of course, the chocolate. I was hooked!On December 6, 2001 my husband was diagnosed with terminal cancer. He had his first chemotherapy treatment a few days later and spent his last Christmas in a hospital bed. As was his habit, he had already bought the tree, and most of the presents. He made me promise to have Christmas as usual for our five year old daughter. I will never forget being in our basement on Christmas Eve, after having put out the milk and cookies for Santa, crying and wrapping, lamenting,201CI can2019t do this! What do I know about this? I2019m Jewish.201D See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Ms. Whiteman’s career path was shaped by the untimely death of her physician husband. She chose to return to school so that she could teach nursing and have a more predictable schedule than she did as a hospital program nurse working shifts on the open heart unit.However, as so often happens in life, that plan never materialized. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

My book, Road to Respect, starts with a chapter entitled 201CChoosing to Walk the Talk.201D 201CLeading the Change201C is the final chapter of the book which starts with this quote by Albert Schweitzer: 201CExample is not the main thing in influencing others. It is the only thing.201D The importance of a personal commitment to respect and leading by example are central themes in the book, practices I have worked hard to personally integrate in my life. I mean, if I am going to inspire others to be respectful and live up to my reputation as, in the words of one of my clients, 201CThe Respect Lady,201D it is fairly critical that I 201CWalk my Talk.201DI certainly have the intention to align my behaviour with my values. At the end of the day however, as Canadian Human Rights Laws illustrate, it is the outcome that matters. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

I discovered RespectfulWorkplace.com, a site 201Cdevoted entirely to fostering awareness and providing resources for creating more respect in the workplace201D in early 2009. When I learned that the new site was looking for contributors, I jumped at the chance to become involved. I contacted Melanie Sklarz, web content coordinator, the conversation started, and I2019ve been a regular contributor ever since. After Road to Respect was published Melanie interviewed me for one of our posts.RespectfulWorkplace.com is a division of Legacy Business Cultures,(formerly Edge Learning of Ohio), founded in 1997 by Managing Partner Paul Meshanko. I view Melanie, Paul and myself as 201Crespect collaborators.201D We share a core belief in the 201Ctransformational201D power of respect to create both individual and organizational health and success. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

These days we2019re hearing a lot about values based leadership. That was not the case in 1960 when Issy Sharp, founder of Four Seasons Hotels and Resorts, opened his first hotel. If you2019ve read Road to Respect you may recall that Issy2019s decision to build his workplace culture on the 201CGolden Rule,201D (treat others as you would like to be treated) was met with scepticism from many on his senior team. But Issy was undaunted. He firmly believed that if his staff felt appreciated and esteemed, they would deliver exceptional service and make hotel guests feel valued and respected. He chose to remain committed to his idea of a values based culture, characterized by values based leadership.The rest, as they say, is history. Four Seasons Hotels and Resorts is one of the most successful hotel chains in the world, consistently recognized as an Employer of Choice by Fortune magazine among others. All because Issy Sharp understood the power of the values based leadership. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Will Are We There Yet? Second in an interview series On April 30th, I sat down with Donna Wilson, VP, Industry Services & Sustainability at WorkSafeBC , to get her perspective on Women, Position & Power. Ms. Wilson has a wealth of knowledge and experience and I found her story fascinating. I encourage you to listen to the entire interview. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

On Thursday May 3, BC Labor Minister Margaret MacDiarmid tabled amendments to the Workers Compensation Act to address workplace bullying and harassment. BC is following a legislative trend which began 2004 when Quebec amended its Labour Standards legislation to include psychological harassment 2013 aka workplace bullying.What is psychological harassment? Any vexatious behaviour in the form of repeated and hostile or unwanted conduct, verbal comments, actions or gestures, that affects an employee2019s dignity or psychological or physical integrity and that results in a harmful work environment for the employee. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

This month I am asking all of you in the Road to Respect community to help me become North America’s Next Greatest Speaker.In February I presented Speak Up: Speak Out – Personal Power and Respect in Business at the Vancouver chapter of eWomenNetwork.  After the presentation Pamela Chatry, Executive Managing Director told me about a speakers competition that eWomenNetwork was holding and encouraged me to enter.eWomenNetwork has thousands of members.  Many of those members are also members of the eWomenNetwork speakers bureau.  Many are professional speakers.In spite of the fact that I really didn’t think I had a hope of making it, I decided to enter.  It wasn’t really about winning, it was more about affirming my intention to speak, affirming my commitment to talk about the things I am passionate about: power, respect, and disrespect: subjects that many of us prefer to avoid dealing with.I entered  the competition without any expectation.  Imagine my surprise when on March 27th I received the following email: See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

As I frequently tell my audiences, one of the most encouraging findings with respect to workplace bullying is the evidence that establishes the effectiveness of coaching in shifting the behaviour of individuals who routinely engage in disrespectful, power based behaviours. The exception, I point out, would be that small percentage of individuals, 1% within the general population, who can be classified as psychopaths; individuals who are incapable of changing their behaviour because they lack empathy and feel no remorse or guilt, regardless of what they say or do.Until recently, I assumed that we would find that same small percentage reflected in our workplaces. Apparently I was wrong. According to research by Dr. Robert Hare, the Canadian psychologist who co-authored Snakes in Suits: When Psychopaths go to Work, the likelihood of finding a psychopath in your senior leadership team is 4 times higher than within the general population.It seems that contemporary corporate culture, particularly within the financial services industry, provides the ideal environment for psychopaths; excessively narcissistic individuals who mimic rather than feel emotions, who lie, cheat, steal or harm with no feeling of remorse. Psychopaths are manipulative risk takers, knowing when and how to turn on the charm to get what they want, without caring who or what they destroy to get it.The reason there is a much higher likelihood of finding them in the C-Suite is because they are drawn to position and power. They seek out situations that will provide them unfettered access to both. Unfortunately, far too many corporate cultures are structured to ensure their psychopathic desires are fulfilled.They are welcomed into a workplace cleverly disguised as the “turnaround” guy. Charismatic and confident, they boast of moving from one company to another, hired to cut costs, trim the excesses, dispose of waste while getting paid big bucks to do so. The damage and destruction they cause to corporate culture, morale, teamwork, employee health and turnover are rarely reflected in what gets captured in bottom line results.According to British researcher Clive Boddy, author of the book “Corporate Psychopaths: Organizational Destroyers,” the 2007-2008 financial crisis may have resulted in the growing proliferation of psychopathic personalities in the C suite. "Psychopaths are great bullies. They are cunning and manipulative, and great at engineering situations. Although they don't have emotions themselves, they can create emotional situations. The rest of us don't even realize we're being manipulated until it's too late."1Corporate psychopaths never stay in one company long enough to get caught, particularly as no one is really looking to catch them. Their lack of empathy, “tough love” managerial style, and interest in risk taking are often viewed as the kinds of traits that will provide that competitive edge so many of today’s companies are seeking. Typical of those who engage in bullying behaviour, they are able to charm and manipulate those whose support they need, as they steal credit for the accomplishments of others who they coldly blame for any problems or issues that arise during their brief tenure.According to Paul Babiak, a New York industrial psychologist and co-author with Dr. Hare of "Snakes in Suits", todays turbulent and challenging economic reality is creating “golden times for cold, career opportunists like psychopaths.” In addition to the people costs listed above,which he has been documenting for over 16 years, Babiak is concerned about a new danger to companies who allow these individuals to infiltrate their ranks.Corporate crime is on the rise. A November 2011 report by Price, Waterhouse Coopers shows a 13% increase in global economic crime since its 2009 world survey, with an average cost per company of $5 million. And most of the crimes are inside jobs: 56% of companies say the offenders were employees. 2 Here’s See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

This article highlights some of what my first guest Anne Kinvig COO of Pacific Blue Cross & BC Life shared in her interview. This is the first in the series, which will continue once a quarter throughout 2012. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

This is Erica Pinsky's full 35 minute recorded interview with Anne Kinvig, COO of Pacific Blue Cross See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

It’s a New Year. In spite of the fact that according to the Mayan calendar it is also going to be our last, I am feeling very optimistic about 2012.One reason for my optimism is the fact that Values.com, The Foundation for A Better Life, an organization that I blogged about last year has not only survived, but is thriving. It now has the economic clout to advertise in multiple media streams to promote the importance of values in making a positive difference in people’s lives and communities. During the holiday season I passed a billboard that caught my eye because, rather than yet another ad for some product we all just have to run out and buy, it had a simple slogan about doing good. PeopleforGood.ca, like Values.com, is interested in making the world a better place. They don’t want us to buy anything. They just want us to do good: to be generous, compassionate, respectful and kind, precisely what I am dedicated to create in our workplaces.Another reason I am feeling optimistic about 2012 is because within the next few months the Mental Health Commission of Canada will be releasing voluntary standards for psychologically healthy workplaces. In addition to establishing standards for psychological health in Canadian workplaces, the Commission will be encouraging employers to set targets to achieve them, and will provide strategies to achieve healthier workplaces that are measurable, sustainable and allow employers to track improvement. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

If you have had a chance to check out my web site lately, you might remember reading this on the home page. Bullying and harassment produce disconnected, fear based cultures where employees won’t speak up. And when employees are afraid to speak up, not only are costly problems going on unresolved, but innovative and creative ideas that will enhance your organizational effectiveness are being stifled.In Road to Respect, I talk about the fact that it is not the absence of disrespect in and of itself that creates superior business results. Rather it is the releasing of individual potential that a respectful workplace fosters that produces that outcome. Respectful, relationship based leadership creates an environment where people feel connected, where they want to contribute to their full potential and are empowered to do so.Last spring I was facilitating a respectful leadership session with a client with whom I have been working for the past couple of years. Given that Road to Respect leadership is relationship based, we spend a lot of time in those sessions focused on respectful communication: what it is and how to develop the skills that allow us to demonstrate it. We were working through a number of role play scenarios, intended to provide skill practice for the participants. The skills I want participants to learn are included in a written guide that each person receives. Practically speaking, what that means is that there is generally a lot of reading and page turning when we are doing these exercises. At one point, one of the participants spoke up and said, “You know, it would be really helpful if this stuff was available as an app. Then we would really be able to make use of it and access it when we need it.”Developing an app was something that had never occurred to me, however, as soon as this fellow said it the light went on. For years I have been providing my clients with materials in paper form because, when I started out 13 years ago that was the status quo. I talk to my clients about ensuring that workplace leaders put their materials in a binder that will be easily accessible when they need them. But let’s face it. Can you really pull out a binder when you are walking down the hall and overhear a disrespectful comment? Will you be able to access your binder when you are in someone else’s office? Will those paper materials be there to support you when you really need them? My goal is to have respectful communication become a workplace norm within my client’s workplaces, because it is that norm that lays the foundation for a respectful, relationship based culture. Next month I will have an downloadable tool that will greatly increase the possibility of that goal being achieved – the Road to Respect Speak Up E-Guide, the first in a series of new eBooks we have developed as a result of the comment I heard in that session last spring. You can have it on your iPhone or Android phone or your iPad so that the tips you need to speak up respectfully will be available whenever you need them.I purposefully structure my training sessions as an interactive conversation. I have been working for years to develop a presenting style that will encourage learners to be engaged and participatory. I know that the subjects I talk about; respect, disrespect, power, harassment, and bullying are not easy to talk about. I know that many of us would prefer to avoid talking about them.I also know that, as James Baldwin once said “Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced.” If we want to eradicate destructive, disrespectful, power based behaviours in our workplaces, we have to start talking about them. My job is to provoke that conversation. I am strategic about building trust and relationship in my sessions. Before the sessions start I always take time to say a quick hello to everyone in the room, so that I have at least a brief mom See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

There is a lot to celebrate this month. In addition to the holiday season, December 3 is International Day of Persons with Disabilities and December 10, International Human Rights Day, marking the 63rd anniversary of the adoption of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights.I didn’t grow up celebrating Christmas. It was “their” holiday. It wasn’t until I met my late husband that I experienced the “magic” of Christmas; the amazing smell of a living tree, the fun of decorating, the comfort of lights on dark winter evenings, the eggnog, the gingerbread and of course, the chocolate. I was hooked!On December 6, 2001 my husband was diagnosed with terminal cancer. He had his first chemotherapy treatment a few days later and spent his last Christmas in a hospital bed. As was his habit, he had already bought the tree, and most of the presents. He made me promise to have Christmas as usual for our five year old daughter. I will never forget being in our basement on Christmas Eve, after having put out the milk and cookies for Santa, crying and wrapping, lamenting, “I can’t do this! What do I know about this? I’m Jewish.” See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

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At a recent networking event I was standing near a couple of younger women who were deep in a conversation about challenges they were facing at work.  After introducing ourselves I learned that they both work in large organizations, each in a position of power.   One woman was talking about a staff member who seemed to have no idea as to what constituted appropriate workplace behaviour.  Apparently this is a common problem because the other woman seemed to be experiencing a lot of the same issues at her workplace.... See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Ever heard of Dagenham, England? I know I hadn’t until very recently when I saw Made in Dagenham, a film about female employees at the Ford Plant who walked off their jobs in 1968 to protest the fact that they were getting paid a lot less than men doing work of equal value. It was that action that led to the passage of the Equal Pay Act in Britain. It wasn’t long before countries on both sides of the pond followed suit and passed similar pieces of legislation. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

I heard about Heritage Law quite by accident. I met lawyer Monique Shebbeare at a networking event. I learned that she was working in a firm focused on estates, wills and family law. Then she shared that she is the mother of an 18 month old. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

As I discuss in Road to Respect, building a respectful workplace culture is not about adopting a paper strategy. It is about the willingness of those in leadership to really walk the talk, to take action to ensure that the policy serves as a foundation for a truly respectful, values driven culture. Apparently, that willingness is thriving among the leaders at NSCU. Michele had nothing but positive things to say about her experience working with North Shore Credit Union. Although she was not an employee, she was immediately welcomed and made to feel like part of the team.She described a workplace where employees were engaged and passionate, working together in a supportive environment, committed to producing superior results. To top it off she even used the word respectful to describe the workplace culture. I left that meeting elated. I love to hear stories of companies, particularly those I have worked with, that are getting respect right! Wow, I thought as I made my way back to the Canada Line, you simply can’t buy such great PR. You can, however, create it. You can ensure that what I heard from Michele becomes a workplace norm when you do what they have done at North Shore Credit Union – be deliberate and strategic about creating a workplace where employees feel respected and valued. I recently sat down with Marni Johnson, Vice President of Human Resources and Communications at NSCU to find out more about what they are doing to get respect right. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

I had the opportunity last month to sit down with John DeHart and learn more about what propelled Nurse Next Door to the number one spot as BC’s Top Employer. I am pleased to be able to share the highlights with you in this first e-news of a new decade. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.