Everyday EQ

Hi there! This is just a quick announcement about what's next for the Everyday EQ podcast. I'll be going on a brief hiatus, returning in October with new episodes. Thank you SO much for listening and supporting the podcast over the past few months, and I hope to connect with you again when the podcast returns.

In this episode of the Everyday EQ podcast, I'm teaching you how to apply the 4 stages of emotional intelligence (Self-Awareness, Self-Management, Social Awareness, and Relationship Management) to help you manage your anxiety more effectively. At the core, anxiety is an emotional reaction with a very real, accompanying neurological response. I'll discuss how you can use your emotional intelligence practice to identify your anxiety triggers and manage the underlying root issues to create a sustainable, healthy approach to anxiety management. 00:36 - How emotional intelligence can help us solve everyday problems in our daily lives2:49 - Applying emotional intelligence to help you manage your anxiety3:38 - What is anxiety? 4:16 - What your brain does during anxiety5:49 - Looking at the emotions that drive us6:49 - Anxiety is a symptom, it's not the root issue8:27 - What are your personal anxiety triggers? 9:22 - Two potential reasons you can't pinpoint your anxiety triggers12:04 - How does your anxiety present itself?12:50 - This is how you apply the first stage of emotional intelligence, Self-Awareness, to manage your anxiety14:09 - Stage 2 of emotional intelligence: Self-Management and how to regulate your anxiety18:25 - How to regulate your fear-based, anxiety-inducing response20:30 - Pro Tip 1: You must adopt this belief if you want to manage your anxiety response21:40 - Pro Tip 2: Here's another objection you'll have to overcome in order to manage your anxiety 25:15 - Moving on to Stage 3 of emotional intelligence: How to apply Social Awareness to help you manage your anxiety29:19 - And now, Stage 4 of emotional intelligence: Applying Relationship Management in an effort to manage your anxiety31:12 - Where the fear comes from As always, thanks for listening! If you have any questions, please feel free to reach out to me at info [at] theceqo [dot] com.

In today's episode of the Everyday EQ podcast, I'm teaching you the final competency in emotional intelligence, relationship management. Relationship management is about using your awareness of your emotions and the emotions of others to have successful interactions. It's one of my favorite components of EQ because it's the culmination of everything you've learned from the other competencies (Self-Awareness, Self-Regulation/Internal Validation, and Empathy/Social Awareness). Basically, relationship management is where you get to flex your EQ muscle and put your skills to work. So here are 5 tips to help you do just that, and master your relationship management. 00:00 - Intro00:41 - A quick explainer on how the components of emotional intelligence are categorized1:35 - If you want to learn more about the other emotional intelligence competencies, check out my previous podcast episodes on Self-Awareness, Self-Regulation, Internal Validation, and Empathy. 1:48 - Relationship management is the culmination of everything you've learned about emotional intelligence 2:50 - Relationship management is where you get to take action and put your new emotional intelligence development to use3:24 - What is relationship management?3:40 -  First step to managing your relationships better using emotional intelligence: Be intentional 4:22 - Pro Tip: Share your intention with others involved in the interaction5:13 - Number 2: Know what you want emotionally5:18 - Pro Tip: Definitely DON'T do this5:44 - You need to know your Top 5 Emotional Needs. Figure them out by downloading my free worksheet here: https://theceqo.com/top-5-needs7:32 - Number 3: Get your empathy ready!8:07 - Pro Tip: Lean in on active listening8:48 - Another Pro Tip: Try to meet others' universal emotional needs9:53 - Number 4: Handle your triggers BEFORE they happen10:38 - Pro Tip: Create an EQ action plan13:41 - It's all about maintaining a feeling of command and control for yourself14:33 - Number 5: Do a post-interaction check-in with yourself and others14:51 - Pro Tip: An emotionally intelligent interaction can still be successful even if it's challenging. 17:02 - Pro Tip for the Pros: If you're using this technique in a professional environment, use surveys or assessments to solicit feedback.17:52 - This relationship management practice may be uncomfortable at first, but stick with it.Thanks for listening! If you have any questions or comments, please reach out to me at julia [at] theceqo [dot] com.

In today's episode of the Everyday EQ podcast, it's all about your PERSPECTIVE. How they get shaped, what it means to adopt a new perspective, and, if your perspective is holding you back from achieving what you want, four steps to take to change your perspective. Enjoy!00:00 - Intro00:40 - How changing your perspective can benefit you1:40 - Outline of today's episode2:02 - What creates our perspective in the first place?7:30 - Here's a metaphor that will illustrate the experience of changing your perspective13:37 - The four steps to take to change your perspective13:52 - Step 1: Develop your self-awareness around your current perspective.18:35 - Step 2: Identify the rules that are blocking you from having the perspective you need to get what you want.21:39 - Step 3: Write new rules.27:26 - Step 4: Integrate the new rules. This is what actually solidifies your new perspective.29:42 - The core components of the integration process 30:36 - How life is after you've changed your perspectiveThanks for listening! If you have any questions, feel free to reach out to me at info [at] theceqo [dot] com. 

In this episode of the EverydayEQ podcast, I'm sharing a personal breakthrough (eep, vulnerability) I had about external validation, and how I established more self-awareness around my ego's desire to be validated by another. I talk about how people and the relationships we have with them serve as mirrors, illuminating our own lower and higher selves. And I Illustrate how my unconscious emotions kept me stuck in cycles that didn't serve me. I hope there's something in this episode that helps you deepen your own self-awareness around how and/or why you seek validation.*Trigger warning: Some of this content may hit close to home if you're dealing with a very similar situation.*00:00 - Intro2:39 - Let's begin the show3:18 - The cost of waiting for external validation3:51 - All relationships are mirrors that help us see more about ourselves (if we're open to recognizing this)4:43 - Two examples of how this mirroring effect happens in relationships6:34 - How I challenged myself to go deeper and look at what was being reflected back to me in my own relationships7:24 - The biggest mirror of my life7:51 - Bringing it back to the validation thing8:36 - My process of self-reflection that helped me understand what this relationship was showing me about my own shadow qualities 9:40 - Aaaaand here's my hangup with the external validation10:38 - My "oh crap" breakthrough moment10:55 - A harsh truth about narcissists11:20 - What I can do with this new self-awareness around my attachment to external validation11:33 - More insight into how I kept myself trapped in this cycle that didn't support me12:40 - Internal validation is stronger than external validation13:38 - You can become addicted to external validation15:15 - Basically it comes down to learning how to TRUST YOURSELF Thanks for listening! Please share, rate, and leave a review if you're into it. And you can always reach out to me at info [at] theceqo [dot] com. 

In this episode of the Everyday EQ podcast, I nerd out on neurodiversity and emotional intelligence with my childhood friend, Samantha Gergans, who now has an impressive resume that includes School Design Director at City Year, a Master of Arts in Teaching in Elementary Education, AND an M.A. in Human Development and Psychology in Education. We dive deep into social emotional learning and emotional intelligence competencies, and their limitations when it comes to serving a diverse student and user base. And, at the end, Samantha offers AMAZING insights into how we can develop more inclusive competencies when it comes to social emotional education. 00:00 - Intro00:59 - Get to know my guest, Samantha Gergans3:10 - Discussing Samantha's focus on the integration of social, emotional, and academic development as School Design Director at Compass Academy + some background about City Year 5:17 - Learning more about Compass Academy's success in social emotional development.6:43 - What social emotional learning looks like in action at this school.9:00 - The 6 social emotional learning competencies at Compass Academy: Advocacy, Communication, Goal Navigation, Growth Mindset, Metacognition, Self-Awareness11:16 - Talking about national social emotional learning (SEL) competencies as defined by The Collaborative for Academic, Social, and Emotional Learning, and where these competencies fall short of supporting neurodiverse students12:21 - Drawing parallels between SEL competencies and emotional intelligence competencies12:51 - Are these SEL competencies inclusive enough? Discussing strengths and weaknesses of the SEL competencies when it comes to multilanguage and diverse learners.14:18 - Pointing out the problematic and non-inclusive language of SEL competencies15:57 - Samantha shares her personal experience as a neurodiverse individual when encountering the ableist nature of EQ and SEL competencies, and offers more inclusive alternatives.17:09 - And what about students with physical disabilities? 17:59 - Samantha's take on how we can develop more inclusive SEL competencies and standards (hint: It involves empathy, a component of emotional intelligence).21:37 - The point of SEL and emotional intelligence is to develop and maintain resilience. 22:33 - The five elements of resilience ABOUT SAMANTHA GERGANS:Samantha Gergans (she/they/them, B.A. Psychology - Lewis & Clark College, M.A.T. Elementary Education - National-Louis University, M.A. Human Development and Psychology in Education - UCLA) spent 6 years as an instructional coach and designer with City Year Los Angeles, having reconnected with the organization after her own corps year with City Year Chicago (FY07). She went on to complete a teaching residency with Chicago's Academy for Urban School Leadership, teach 4th and 5th grade in Chicago Public Schools, and land in LA to conduct educational research at UCLA. Across these experiences, Samantha always ended up at the same conclusion: students' academic well-being hinges on the design of learning environments and experiences that meet the needs of the whole person - students, teachers, AmeriCorps Members, parents, and so on. Whomever the educational stakeholder, they deserve and need to feel safe, seen, and supported - and this might be achieved through integrative, inclusive, and intentional designs and practices. Connect with Samantha on Instagram at @halcyonsam, and for more about City Year, visit cityyear.org.

In today's episode of the Everyday EQ podcast, I explain EMPATHY. Empathy is the next EQ component in my series on the elements of emotional intelligence, and is one of the most important overall. Not only do I explain what empathy is and why it is mission-critical in life, but I'm also giving you six ways to develop your empathy—six! You got no excuses not to be empathetic, now. :) Definitely stay to the end for number six. It's my fave and the most effective.____00:00 - Intro00:47 - Kicking things off with another component of emotional intelligence (and it's a big one): EMPATHY1:16 - What I'm covering in today's episode: What empathy is and how to develop your empathy.1:24 - What empathy entails and why it's a must-have skill2:32 - Empathy will make you a smarter human.  3:11- Here are 6 ways you can develop your empathy and understand others' emotions.3:46 - Number One: Assessments 5:42 - Number Two: Practice active listening8:23 - Number Three: Ask clarifying questions9:18 - Number Four: Observe body language12:24 - Number Five (when you can't do numbers 1-4): Apply universal emotional needs 14:18 - Number Six: My quick-and-dirty method to being more empathetic (my favorite and the most effective, in my opinion)16:29 - What empathy is NOTThanks so much for tuning in! As always, if you have any questions, feel free to contact me at info [at] theceqo [dot] com.

In this episode of the Everyday EQ podcast, I'm pumped to chat with Chris Belloso, entrepreneur and host of The Beautiful Struggle Podcast. Chris' story is one of perseverance, self-direction, and liberation. Listen in on our conversation as Chris shares how he didn't let perfectionism stop him from "failing" his way forward and finding his purpose of creating generational wealth for his family and community. We also talk about why finding your WHY is CRITICAL, how to properly invest in yourself, and the two BIG things Chris had to overcome in order to get on his purpose path (listen up: You might be dealing with these two challenges yourself).For more from Chris and to check out his podcast, you can check him out on Instagram @ChrisBelloso and @beautifulstrugglepodcast.00:00 - Introducing my guest, Chris Belloso, host of The Beautiful Struggle Podcast1:20 - How Chris got inspired to start his entrepreneurial journey4:38 - The value of exploring, not knowing exactly where you're going, and "failing" 6:10 - What entrepreneurship really means to Chris6:48 - Exploring entrepreneurship in this way allowed Chris to find his purpose7:30 - What's at the core of Chris' purpose-onion?8:43 - We all have a "generational curse" to break in our own lives and it can be challenging to pave our own way.9:40 - Here's how Chris did it (and what it felt like for him!)11:47 - I weigh in on how emotional intelligence comes into play when you start to chase down your dream life.11:38 - How Chris started his Beautiful Struggle Podcast15:40 - Another example of how Chris didn't let perfectionism or fear stop him16:10 - The biggest lesson that Chris learned from launching his podcast18:03 - It's important to know the right way to invest in yourself18:50 - Chris is currently investing in his mental health and self-care19:40 - Chris had to shift his mindset to get to this point where he can balance his entrepreneurial drive with self-care.21:59 - The new way of entrepreneur-ing.22:22 - Chris' advice? Be a triple threat in your life.23:10 - This positions you to create a whole, fulfilling, purposeful, satisfying life.24:30 - Because who wants to be lonely at the top? No, thanks.25:27 - You never know where this path will take you, and you can't anticipate the good stuff that will show up. 26:31 - How Chris managed his fear and moved forward anyway28:41 - Self-knowing (aka, self-awareness) + self-trust + faith = the fear-busting formula29:19 - Preparation leads to confidence, which leads to overcoming fear and showing up as your best self.30:13 - And then you get to "collect the evidence," as I say, that you CAN do this and you ARE worthy and will succeed and so on.31:31 - Learning how to be more confident is like strengthening a muscle. 31:41 - Two MAJOR lessons Chris has experienced from his own journey and challenges that he sees in his community: 1) Getting out of unsupportive environments AND 2) Educating yourself past survival mentality34:32 - Being self-motivated and internally validated is key.35:29 - For Chris, it's about figuring out what his WHY is and always aligning with that.36:10 - Use this WHY to help you make the RIGHT decisions for you. Use it for everything!37:00 - Chris' contact infoThanks to Chris for stopping by and dropping knowledge! If you have any questions, contact me at info [at] theceqo [dot] com. Thanks for listening!

In this episode of Everyday EQ, I review the third component of emotional intelligence, which I call internal validation. This is my adaptation of Daniel Goleman's "intrinsic motivation," so I explain the difference and why I've found validation to be a more powerful influencer of behavior. I break down the different types of internal validation and external validation, and I even give you an exercise to help you assess whether you're just doing something to get external validation. Life-changing stuff, here. 00:30 - I label this component of emotional intelligence as Internal Validation instead of Daniel Goleman's "intrinsic motivation."1:01 - First, let's define intrinsic motivation 1:25 - Now, on to why I see validation as more influential when it comes to your emotional intelligence3:22 - An example of making money from internal validation vs for external validation5:58 - Breaking down the difference between internal validation vs external validation6:16 - Internal validation feels like...7:08 - And external validation be like...7:55 - A sidebar on trying to prove yourself8:49 - Back to listing other forms of external validation11:05 - How to stay internally validated 11:24 - Start with your system for success, using your top 5 emotional needs. ***If you don't know your top 5 emotional needs, you can discover them with this free worksheet that you can DOWNLOAD HERE https://theceqo.com/top-5-needs (or grab it from my bio link on Instagram @justjfc).***12:44 - Creating a life that's aligned will take effort, not gonna lie. #worthit13:20 - But, even with its challenges, creating an authentic life will FEEL better. 14:49 - How internal validation can help you leverage your emotions so you are doing things for the right reasons14:49 - An alignment check exercise that will help you figure out whether you're saying yes to something bc of external validation or internal validation15:57 - A word of caution about the lifespan of external validation16:33 - Ok, on to the actual exercise17:20 - Real-life example time!20:41 - What to do if only a few of your needs are satisfied AND WHAT NOT TO DO21:31 - This emotional intelligence 411 in the "NOT SATISFIED" column will show you where you might default into chasing external validation. How's that for some newfound self-awareness?! 22:28 - Here's how it would go down in this dating scenario if you were INTERNALLY validated instead.23:23 - And finally, how to make sure you're setting ALIGNED goals that are truly based on internal validationAs always, if you have questions about emotional intelligence or anything that you heard on this episode, please reach out to me at info [at] theceqo [dot] com. Thanks for listening! 

In this episode of the Everyday EQ podcast, I chat with Aryan Rashed, friend and owner of Tremble Pilates, my all-time fave workout studio in Miami. Not only do we talk about how the Tremble workout will change your life (hear my story about what it did for me), but Aryan's astute approach to leadership and building culture is full of insights we can all use. Listen in as she shares what it takes to develop true leadership skills, and how to develop a trusted brand that creates meaning and client loyalty. This episode is for entrepreneurs, leaders, and anyone who wants to know what it takes to go from good to great. About Aryan Rashed:With a strong passion for the fitness and wellness industry, Aryan is the owner of Tremble Pilates. Aryan's clients range from beginners to professional athletes and celebrities. Tremble fuses principles of Pilates, balance, flexibility, strength, core, circuit, and strength training. Aryan created her own adaptive fitness program currently taught at Jackson Memorial Hospital and the Miami VA and works with the Sabrina Cohen Foundation to implement training for the paralysis community and beyond. Aryan is also an attorney, barred in Florida and Washington DC, received her Master's from Stanford University, earned her BA from UC Berkeley, worked at the Women and Public Policy Program at Harvard University, has been a featured expert on various fitness and wellness forums, and currently serves as an ambassador for Lululemon South Miami.Follow Tremble on Instagram @makeittremble_ and makeittremble.com. *This episode was recorded in April 2021 and COVID restrictions have since been updated. Visit Tremble's website for the most up-to-date studio info.*1:04 - Let's get into Aryan's rapid-fire achievements and how she and her team turned COVID into an opportunity.3:49 - Integrity drove Aryan's client-focused decisions.4:20 - The importance of developing trust with your client, and creating a brand that means something to them. 5:32 - How Aryan made the transition from law to fitness entrepreneur.6:00 - Fitness provided Aryan a positive outlet that went way beyond the superficial to the emotional. That's what she invested in when starting her business.7:56 - Aryan's initial vision wasn't what it is today.8:17 - The sweet taste of impact8:33 - Aryan had to unlearn some things to switch from a law mindset to a CEO mindset.10:29 - That feeling when you know you've created something special...12:26 - Does leading a purposeful business have the same feel-good effect for my guest as fitness itself? 12:53 - Aryan gets real about what it takes to build a successful brand and culture.13:33 - Developing strong leadership skills takes practice and knowing people. 14:30 - Here's what worked for Aryan when it came to developing her own leadership skills.15:18 - Which brings us back to... wait for it... EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE. If you haven't figured it out yet, Aryan is a perfect example of an emotionally intelligent leader.16:21 - Now, let's talk about this life-changing, redefine-what-you're-made-of workout.20:36 - This takes the Tremble experience from good from great.23:22 - I share a personal story about a major mindset transformation I experienced at Tremble.25:12 - The massively positive effects one person's elevated dedication can have on the entire group.26:43 - On negative self-talk and turning CAN'Ts into CANs28:36 - After already achieving so much amazingness, what's next for Aryan and the Tremble tribe?THANK YOU to Aryan for sharing her wisdom, and to you for listening!  Questions? Email me at info [at] theceqo [dot] com. 

In this episode of the Everyday EQ podcast, I discuss the second component of emotional intelligence, self-regulation (also referred to as self-management). Tune in as I teach you my three steps self-regulating your emotions effectively. In our 30+ minutes together, I'll walk you through exercises that help you understand how your emotions manifest specifically to you, and how to easily discover the true emotions that are triggering you (sometimes they're not what you think they are...). Plus, I'm sharing the number 1 pitfall to avoid when self-regulating. IT'S SUPER IMPORTANT. Like, fr fr. I cover A LOT in this episode, so get comfortable and let's dive in.1:04 - Introducing self-regulation, the second component of emotional intelligence, and how it relates to the first component of EQ, self-awareness.2:55 - Breaking down the definition of self-regulation5:47 - Here are my 3 steps to self-regulate your emotions.6:14 - Step 1: Familiarize yourself with how your emotions present themselves7:49 - One easy way to develop awareness around how your emotions manifest.9:28 - Talkin' 'bout some triggers. What they are, why they happen, and what in the tarnation is happening to our emotions during one.12:42 - Why it's so challenging to be emotionally intelligent and self-aware when you're getting triggered13:02 - Step 2: Diffuse these triggers and emotionally challenging situations. Here's how to do that in a 5-minute exercise.17:00 - Step 3: Understand your options to self-regulate in real time and shift the dynamic to create better feeling emotions. 17:12 - This is the ultimate goal of self-regulation and will be your focus when self-regulating in real time.17:52 - Here are three ways that you can self-regulate your emotions in the moment.18:01 - Option 1: Remove yourself and recalibrate18:39 - Recalibration can include the trigger diffusing exercise, and it can also include these other things.19:00 - The benefit of recalibration: Identifying patterns of triggers so that you can heal, integrate, and resolve them.20:11 - Option 2: Proactively shift the dynamic.20:48 - Soon, processing emotions in real-time like this will be easy peezy lemon squeezy. 21:31 - Option 3: Monitor your emotional state and don't succumb to emotional baiting.23:03 - But what is "emotional baiting"?23:56 - A key factor in self-regulation is feeling like you have control over an emotional situation. 25:05 - This is how you gain back your command when you feel out of control.27:10 - Also DON'T DO THIS when trying to self-regulate. (Seriously, if you listen to nothing else in this episode, listen to this.)27:35 - Your ego is like a drug hit. 29:12 - How the ego uses external validation to trick you into believing it's helping.29:32 - Examples of external validation and why they don't work.31:10 - Recapping today's lesson on how to self-regulate your emotionsAs always, if you have questions about emotional intelligence or anything that you heard on this episode, please reach out to me at info [at] theceqo [dot] com. Thanks for listening! 

In this episode of Everyday EQ, I talk about what your top 5 emotional needs are, why they're so gosh-dang important (no, literally, they will revolutionize how you live if you let them), and how you can identify your own. Casual.00:45 - What are these top 5 emotional needs?1:43 - The name of the game is fulfillment. That's why these needs are so freaking important.1:56 - But why only 5?3:19 - How to figure out your top 5 emotional needs. CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD YOUR FREE TOP 5 NEEDS WORKSHEET: https://theceqo.com/top-5-needs3:59 - You may find similarities in your needs across multiple areas of life. Here's why.6:24 - Why I 10/10 recommend figuring out your top 5 needs (aka, why this is literally the most important thing you can do when developing your EQ and self-awareness)8:12 - A quick note on what healthy empathy is vs. codependent people-pleasing9:14 - The job of satisfying your needs is yours, FIRST. Then you incorporate others who can meet you there.10:11 - And for the love of all that is holy, please don't try to do this if something/someone DOESN'T meet your needs.11:38 - The other reason that knowing your needs is so AH-MAY-ZING: You get REAL clear on what's working in your life and what isn't, and why/why not.14:49 - You can ALSO use your needs to help you evaluate future opportunities, which will help you make better, more aligned decisions in your life. Win!15:19 - Here's why it can get confusing when you're trying to make aligned decisions. 17:01 - What to do when an opportunity does NOT meet ANY of your needs. 17:25 - And what to do when it meets only a few of your needs. 18:42 - Now go discover your top 5 needs! CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD YOUR FREE TOP 5 NEEDS WORKSHEET or try this other, more general technique that I mention at this timestamp.20:30 - A bonus pro tip.As always, if you have questions about emotional intelligence or anything that you heard on this episode, please reach out to me at info [at] theceqo [dot] com. Thanks for listening!

In this episode of the Everyday EQ podcast, I sit down with my old pal, Tracy Wright. A senior reporter for The Daily Mail, Tracy is one of the few people I know who is truly living her dream life, so I, of course, wanted to hear how she did it. Tune in to hear her interesting take on how to life-hack yourself to happiness, how she knew her husband was "the one" after their first date, and what it took for her to start over after being fired from what she thought was her dream job (spoiler: It wasn't, but the job she has now definitely is.)For more life witticisms and the celeb tea, follow Tracy Wright on Instagram @tracyiswright, and check out her stories on The Daily Mail. 00:40 - How Tracy and I know each other1:00 - Tracy's very formal, very official intro1:36 - Jumping into how Tracy met her now-husband, Mike, in the midst of a purpose-driven speed-dating whirlwind. 3:32 - Also, here's the MAIN REASON why I've invited Tracy on this show, aside from her just being an awesome human. 3:51 - What's more amazing is that Tracy didn't even know she was building her dream life when she was doing it.4:12 - What brought Tracy to her life-changing decision to start speed dating, and how she got to (self) work and made some changes. 5:31 - On knowing your dealbreakers and sticking to them. 6:18 - HUGE takeaway: Through all of that dating, Tracy figured out what her intuition actually was, AND how it felt to be around the right person for her. #winning7:34 - *THIS* is what it feels like when something is right and in alignment with your true self.8:06 - What her intuition felt like when she met Mike and knew he was "the one."9:06 - How Tracy learned to put her ego aside as their relationship developed, and her focus shifted from "me" to "we." 9:57 - The questions Tracy still asks herself when she recognizes the need to quiet her ego and come from an emotionally intelligent place in her relationship.10:16 - What communication is like when you're in an emotionally available, unconditionally loving, interdependent relationship.  11:10 - Why Tracy felt she had to be combative in the beginning of their relationship (oh hey there, ego).12:23 - It's important to create containers in life where you feel safe to be vulnerable and express who you are. 12:45 - The learning and growing keeps on going.  13:10 - But remember, this process starts with YOU.13:49 - The steps Tracy took to get out of her comfort zone while staring down her anxiety and depression.15:10 - Not only did Tracy put herself out there to find the love of her life, but she also faced massive uncertainty and a major ego bruise to show up for her dream career. Here's how she did it.  19:27 - ... And it all led to her landing her dream job at The Daily Mail.20:25 - How Tracy developed her ability to self-direct and go after what she wants, despite struggling with anxiety and depression.21:50 - Tracy basically life-hacked her way to her dream job, and I wanna know her secret.25:32 - Be self-aware -- and self-congratulatory -- when you  ARE taking the steps you need to. 28:21 - Tracy's approach led her to a life that's a near-perfect expression of who she truly is.29:42 - But only through this process was she able to learn more about who she was and what she really wanted in life. 30:44 - How Tracy's process helped her bypass fear and manage her anxiety. 31:51 - Tracy sends us off with another pro tip.Thanks so much for listening! If you have any questions, feel free to email me at info [at] theceqo [dot] com.

In this episode of the Everyday EQ podcast, Julia pulls back the curtain on manifestation. Spoiler: There's no magic, there's no mystery. Instead of mantras like "think positively" and "if you believe, you will receive," Julia offers her take on the tangibles of making your visions a reality and what manifestation really means. She also shares the two reasons why your manifestations aren't happening and what to do about it. And for those of you with trust and/or control issues (*raises hand*), this episode will be your personal "how to" for manifesting.1:36 - How Julia's trauma inhibited her ability to "think positively" and "trust the Universe."2:06 - *Your trust issues have entered the chat*2:47 - The role of trust in the manifestation process 3:11 - Enough with the "think positively" already. It's not enough.4:09 - Control issues and manifestation do not play well with each other.5:15 - The other danger of trying to just "think positively"6:50 - Thoughts do play a part, however.7:02 - What manifestation really means7:29 - Why has manifestation become so complicated?10:13 - The only thing we have control over is our own response. Emotional intelligence helps with that.10:40 - Manifestation is actually so simple that you don't even need control.10:51 - The power to make things happen (aka, to manifest them in your life) comes from YOU, homie.11:24 - Two reasons why your manifestations aren't coming to fruition12:27 - How we get off track and start thinking that we want things that we don't really want.13:20 - Ok, so you KNOW you want something, but it's still not showing up. Let's look at what it means to take the right action.15:00 - The point is to align who you are today with who you want to be in the future.15:58 - Here's the good news.16:26 - Your ONLY job is to not get in the way of becoming your future self. Das it.17:12 - Think of it like a roadmap between who you are now and who you want to be. DON'T PUT MORE ROADBLOCKS ON THE ROAD for yourself.18:42 - Because you ARE supported and are meant to express your potential. 19:06 - So don't stand in your own way.As always, if you have questions about emotional intelligence or anything that you heard on this episode, please reach out to Julia at info [at] theceqo [dot] com. Thanks for listening! 

In this episode of the Everyday EQ podcast, Julia discusses the two key components of growth: Healing and taking action. Listen along as Julia breaks down how healing and action work together, and why you MUST do both at the same time in order to create consistent momentum toward your end goal. Julia even shares an exercise you can do to identify what exactly you'll need to heal during your own growth process. 00:42 - There are two components of growth that you have to be working on simultaneously in order for you to evolve: Healing and action. 1:17 - What Julia means by "action"1:40 - Julia defines what the "healing" portion entails.2:15 - This is what happens when you focus too much on just one or the other (Pro tip: Don't do that).3:57 - The pitfall we may encounter if we take action without working on the healing, too.5:14 - Healing can provide the clarity and confidence we need to take better aligned, more effective actions.7:22 - Balancing both will create forward momentum toward who you're trying to become or what you're trying to achieve. 7:41 - Great, we got that cleared up. Now, which one do you start with first?7:48 - Well, you probably already know what action you need to take. (Yes, even you who's saying, "I don't know" right now.)8:01 - The first steps might look like undoing some parts of your life.9:24 - And sometimes that process of undoing doesn't feel so comfy. 10:39 - All actions count, from the big umbrella action to the small, daily decisions. 12:07 - Now back to those of you who think you "don't know" what action to take.12:23 - Here's why you are telling yourself that you "don't know." Also, confusion is not a thing.15:14 - If we already know what action we need to take, it's time to look at the healing side of things. 15:31 - The thing to focus on in your healing15:45 - Here's an exercise you can do to identify all the programming that's keeping you from taking action and moving towards your goal life.17:05 - This is the programming that you'll need to heal and integrate.17:59 - How the process starts to flow together19:11 - Think about "programming" as if you were a computer. When you heal, you rewrite misaligned/poor programming and replace it with better, aligned, supportive programming. This optimizes your operating system and helps you live your best life. (Learn more about  how to optimize your operating system in Episode 2: How Emotional Intelligence Helps You Be Your Best Self.)20:47 - A word to the wise: Healing isn't linear.22:11 - To recap...23:00 - It's a lifelong process, but we love that.If you have a question for Julia about what you heard today, she'd love to hear from you! Send your questions to info [at] theceqo [dot] com. Thanks for listening!

In this episode of the Everyday EQ podcast, Julia chats with Lindsay Hunt, one of her favorite mind and health coaches. Listen in as Lindsay drops some serious knowledge about the role your mindset plays in you successfully transforming your health and body; how you can identify what program/process will actually work for you; and why taking responsibility for your own change is crucial. To connect with Lindsay, follow her on Instagram @walkonthehealthyside or visit her website walkonthehealthyside.com.0:26 - Introducing the woman of the hour, Lindsay Hunt1:03 - How does mindset play into our eating and health habits? 1:48 - Is your mindset aligned to your wellbeing? Lindsay explains what this means.3:04 - It's vital that we listen to our internal cues, but most of us ignore them when trying to grow and improve our health/life. Why is that? 3:26 - Mic drop: "Mindset and EQ is the nutrition of the future."4:21 - Getting to know your mindset + emotional components is v supportive of you and your growth.5:14 - Let's start normalizing high-level mindset training. Treat it like a (mental) fitness program. 6:25 - Mic drop #2: "It comes down to what makes you tick, and the plan the supports your 'ticking.'"6:48 - Julia's advice for figuring out what your 'ticking' feels like7:24 - And now for Lindsay's answer on how you can figure out what makes you tick8:21 - Now that you've figured out what makes you tick, you may still keep yourself from taking action from doing what makes you tick. What's up with that? Lindsay weighs in.8:57 - And this is how we fall into traps of doing something that's not really aligned with who we are and what we need.9:24 - The struggle of creating your own path (being aligned) vs. trying to take a short cut and adopt someone else's as your own (not being aligned)9:57 - But the process can be fun, promise.10:21 - Self-trust is your fuel. 10:32 - What makes Lindsay tick, and how she started pursuing her own aligned path in career, health, and life.12:21 - Pain and discomfort motivated her to make positive changes12:32 - Julia expounds the value of uncomfortable emotions + shares a small story from her own struggle with health and self-expression.13:45 - Mic drop #3: "It's ok to want that. [...] You can love yourself while you work on yourself."14:01 - It's important to know that it's possible to have the health, body, skin, WHATEVER you want. You don't have to settle.14:31 - And enjoy the process of getting to a place where you feel good.14:56 - On taking responsibility for making your own life better15:26 - Lindsay shares the exact moment when she realized she was the only one who could change her circumstances, and what it felt like when she finally started making those changes.17:08 - Two components of getting in alignment and changing17:54 - No one is going to "fix" you -- not even your coach. And that's how it should be.19:31 - What you learn emotionally in the process of improving your health can be applied to improve ANY area of life19:57 - How Lindsay helps her clients build a solid process for transforming their health, and then life20:38 - What is your worry center?21:22 - This is the biggest thing people get stuck on when going through their transformation process.22:09 - Julia can relate. For her, it's about fear of failure.22:33 - Lindsay sees it as a lack of trust.23:10 - Mic drop #4: "If you trust yourself, you will get there."23:45 - Once again, Julia can relate. She sees this in herself when it comes to working out. 24:56 - You know you'll get to your end result when...25:20 - Get in touch with Lindsay!

In this episode of the Everyday EQ podcast, Julia walks you through the four stages you'll go through as you develop your self-awareness. Self-awareness is *the* cornerstone of emotional intelligence, so this is a must-listen if you're serious about this whole 'mastering yourself and living your best life' thing. Follow along and take copious notes, as Julia packs in lots of lessons, revealing self-awareness exercises, and juicy examples, like what to do when that coworker fires off yet another nasty email.:40 - Why self-awareness is the first place to start with developing your emotional intelligence1:43 - A quick personal anecdote about how Julia started developing EQ by understanding others' emotions and how that tripped her up, getting her into unhealthy relationship dynamics3:18 - To all the empaths/codependents/people-pleasers in the house (aka, anyone who focuses on others' emotions/needs at the risk of ignoring their own): It's your time.5:26 - To everyone else: Self-awareness loves you, too. 6:14 - In other words, self-awareness is for anyone who wants to become the best version of themselves.6:28 - On with the show... Introducing the four stages of self-awareness as outlined by Julia7:03 - Stage 1: See all emotions as data8:14 - No such thing as "negative" or "positive" emotions. All are valid and useful.9:36 - Uncomfortable emotions and where they originate10:26 - The difference between a surface emotion and a true emotion11:34 - And now on to our comfortable emotions and where they come from12:25 - The type of data our comfortable/uncomfortable emotions are telling us12:53 - The irony of looking at emotions as data, but ALSO, it helps you externalize your emotions, which is key to developing self-awareness15:49 - A simple exercise to kick-start your self-awareness training17:08 - Stage 2: Know your desired feelings17:20 - Sidebar: If you want to rearrange these stages in a way that works for you, absolutely do it. EQ is a tool that works because it's unique to YOU.17:48 - Back to Stage 2... Why it's important to have awareness of your DESIRED emotional state19:34 - Knowing your desired feelings gives you back command21:21 - So how can you figure out your desired feelings? CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD THE FREE DISCOVER YOUR TOP 5 NEEDS WORKSHEET 22:35 - The benefits of doing this exercise: Clarity, awareness around your internal motivators, and understanding why you've *really* been doing what you've been doing23:54 - Sometimes we try to satisfy our emotional needs via unhealthy dynamics. Whomp, whomp. No sweat, EQ will help you learn to shift to healthier ones.24:49 - Breakthrough, anyone?26:21 - Stage 3: Be emotionally prepared35:25 - The life audit exercise: Knowing where you AREN'T getting your needs met in your life28:19 - This new information will inform what steps you will need to take to align these areas of life and have them satisfy your top 5 needs28:41 - What it means to be emotionally prepared29:44 - [Host's note: Love me some Scorpios]32:14 - Stage 4: Identifying real-time emotions33:20 - What is an emotional trigger and what's going on when it happens to you (the dance between the ego and the true/emotional self)36:22 - How you're gonna handle triggers from now on since you listened to this podcast, went through Stages 1-3, and developed your self-awareness like a boss37:01 - Three options for how to process a triggering situation without losing your ish40:20 - Recapping these three options40:55 - One more exercise to do if you need to quickly diffuse a trigger and label your true emotions in real time43:35 - That's it! The four stages of self-awareness recap

In this episode of Everyday EQ, Julia hops on the mic to talk about why emotional intelligence is the BEST tool to use to help us know ourselves better. She dives into how we've been taught to dismiss our emotions, despite the fact that they contain some of the most important information you'll ever need to know about yourself. This info, when acknowledged, can help you create a model for how to operate as your best self and achieve the success you want. Think of EQ like your operating manual that helps you optimize your operating system. Press play to hear a breakdown of how this works and how your uncomfortable and comfortable emotions are contributing. 1:20 - At the core of it, emotional intelligence is all about you.1:42 - We have a messed up relationship with our emotions. 3:02 - We have been taught to be at war with our emotions, but they hold so much key info that we shouldn't ignore3:38 - Emotions are like f*ck bois/girls3:55 - If we pay attention to our emotions, we can make better decisions4:38 - EQ helps us bring info that's unconscious to our conscious awareness so we can take action on it5:38 - While others are teaching you what worked for them, EQ teaches you what works for Y-O-U6:27 - Increasing your EQ helps you operate at the highest possible level. Think of it like optimizing your personal operating system.8:16 - The study of your EQ is about developing your self-governance and self-mastery 8:36 - And EQ applies to all areas of your life, like *these*9:22 - EQ will revolutionize how you live. Casual.9:46 - How does EQ help you create a tutorial for how to be your best self and achieve the success you want?12:33 - What your emotional experiences are telling you: A breakdown of the messages behind uncomfortable and comfortable emotions12:41 - Sidebar: There's no such thing as "positive" or "negative" emotions12:26 - Back to what those uncomfortable emotions are telling us...16:20 - Comparing your current reality to your ideal future reality17:39 - What about those comfortable emotions? What do they gots to say?19:00 - A new take on emotions: They're the real MVP.21:01 - A word on why alignment/fulfillment/satisfaction > happiness23:00 - Figure out your own personal life KPIs23:36 - More on how your emotions are your compass navigating you towards your best self (one more time for the cheap seats in the back!)25:02 - What to do once you realize what your uncomfortable/comfortable emotions are saying25:50 - To quickly recap... If you have questions for Julia, she'd love to hear from you. Shoot her an email at info [at] theceqo [dot] com

In this episode of the Everyday EQ podcast, Julia breaks down the components of emotional intelligence and what it actually means to apply it to your real life. She covers self-awareness, self-regulation, intrinsic motivation, empathy, and social skills in simple terms. Then, learn the five steps to handling your emotions better, so that you can understand what your emotions are trying to tell you and become more emotionally intelligent in real time. Plus, she shares a ridiculously easy exercise you can use to get past your surface emotions and identify how you're *really* feeling in a triggering situation.1:34 - What is emotional intelligence?2:30 - The breakdown of the five components of emotional intelligence, as defined by Daniel Goleman (self-awareness, self-regulation, intrinsic motivation, empathy, social skills)5:32 - Julia's breakdown of what EQ really is and how to make it actionable5:41 - Emotions are just data6:16 - Why is EQ so dang important? Why should you care about it? Why does Julia believe it will save the world?7:07 - Metaphor time! Emotions are the bumper rails in our bowling lane of life.13:48 - Awareness of our emotions helps us understand who we are and what we really want.14:46 - The relationship between self-awareness and alignment16:18 - How can we handle emotions?16:25 - Going from self-awareness to empathy and emotionally intelligent communication + how that plays out IRL18:07 - How to handle emotions when you're just starting out in this practice of raising your EQ18:22 - First step to handling your emotions in a healthy way? See them coming. You can do this by identifying patterns.20:34 - Second step in how to handle emotions in a healthy way: Let them come. (Say no to distractions!)21:34 - *Self-love has entered the chat*22:49 - Step three: Have empathy for yourself.23:05 - But do *this part right here* to not get stuck in those feels.23:16 - You are not your emotions.24:02 - Step four: The finish line! Understand what your emotions are trying to tell you.26:16 - But wait, there's more! Bonus step five: Take action on this new info.26:22 - Self-trust FTW26:43 - Recap of the five steps to handling emotions in a healthy way27:02 - A simple exercise to identify what you're TRULY feeling + using triggers as a learning opportunity27:12 - The pitfall of bypassing your emotional experience and instead intellectualizing things28:48 - How to diffuse an emotional trigger + a thorough example

Welcome to Everyday EQ, with me, Julia Ford-Carther! This is the show that's all emotional intelligence, all the time. Here, I'll be talking about why EQ is the major key to success that you're probably missing. Whether you want to be better at business, leadership, entrepreneurship, education, careers, relationships, love, health, habits, or just being you, EQ will help you get there. And I'll show you how. Join me!