Single Minded

Linda tells me about a strange encounter at a dinner party, and I tell her about my even stranger dream. If you want to listen to the Rich Roll episode, here it is: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/jonathan-haidt-on-how-social-media-is-rewiring-childhood/id582272991?i=1000653186945

We will do ANYTHING except sit with ourselves in silence. But surely there are alternatives to meditation that can give us some peace?! Read The Cut article here: https://www.thecut.com/2020/01/giving-up-meditating.html

We are SORRY for the long break between episodes!! Who knows how many of you have persevered... but thank you if you're still here listening. We're back to chat about G-Banger's birthday in Daylesford, my screenwriting course, a recent LinkedIn post about 30 Under 30 lists and my ex-boyfriend's new TV series Sugar. 

It's storytime today on the podcast. A few years ago, I decided I wanted to learn how to write. But somehow, this "hobby" turned into a side hustle and all the joy was sucked out of it. Linda also realises her only true hobby has been collecting James Dean posters and postcards... Hmm, that's certainly a hobby I've never heard of, but whatever floats your boat, Linda! 

I recently watched the new Netflix show 'Carol & The End of The World' and wanted to do an episode on the show's main themes: life, death and finding meaning. I emailed Linda the episode plan - with the placeholder episode title "Death & Consciousness" - and it was the end of her world. She replied to my email, "Heavy!!" But here we are.  The Brian Cox videos: https://www.youtube.com/shorts/b4sSw9MC-zY https://www.youtube.com/shorts/KSgNly0bSug

It's new year, and a new Linda! I've just returned from Thailand where I had a near-death experience (spoiler: it was just a panic attack) and have been thinking a lot about what I want to do better this year. If you like this pod, please rate and review on Apple and Spotify... But for the love of god, please don't unfollow me on Instagram lol. Here's the Ben Affleck video I talked about in the episode: https://www.youtube.com/shorts/LrJPTSCSNwI 

I'm joining you today from Lamai Fitness in Thailand to explain why I had the worst birthday ever, and why I think celebrating birthdays is overrated. Naturally, Linda disagrees with me and LOVES her birthday. 

This is probably the most requested topic from listeners... and it's finally here!! There's a Thailand trip for EVERYONE in this episode. The spiritual seeker, the adventurer, the party gal... and more! I hope you love Thailand as much as I do x Poo photo link: https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/iaaf4odpl75dctmg0dlpj/PHOTO-2023-12-07-10-44-16.jpg?rlkey=xjfhq1ce6ykc330nztiwxjlem&dl=0 The itineraries below... The spiritual seeker:The Tri Bay @ Koh Phangan, which is made up of Haad Tien, Haad Yuan & Why Nam BeachThe Sanctuary Thailand is the main resort on Haad TienThe quickest way to get there from Melbourne: Flight to Koh Samui via Singapore, then a boat to Koh PhanganThe backpacker route: Flight to Bangkok, then fly to Surat Thani, then bus & boat to Koh Phangan Once you're there, you can get a taxi to Haad Rin beach and take a long-tail boat to Haad TienThe wellness reset:Koh Samui or Phuket Mum's recco: Phuket Cleanse My recco: Lamai Fitness The adventurerFly from Bangkok to Chiang Mai (3 nights)Bus to Pai (2 nights)Bus to Chiang Rai (2 nights)Fly from Chiang Mai to Koh Samui (3-4 nights)Then boat to Koh Phangan (3-4 nights)Boat to Koh Tao (2 nights)You can travel over to the other side and do Phuket, Krabi and Phi Phi if you have timeYou can fly out of Phuket back to Australia The party gal:Koh Phangan: Srithanu, The Tri Bay or Haad Rin for the Full Moon PartyThe backpacker route: 2-3 month loop around Southeast Asia Cambodia: Phnom Penh, Siam Reap, Kampot, Koh Rong islandsVietnam: Ho Chi Minh to Hanoi Laos, then you can cross the border to Chiang Mai and make your way down south 

As Linda would say, "I'm back bitches!" Here's everything that has happened in the last four months while I've been gone. 

Today, Ruby and I discuss the article I Used To Be A Human Being by Andrew Sullivan. You can read the article here: https://nymag.com/intelligencer/2016/09/andrew-sullivan-my-distraction-sickness-and-yours.htmlIt's a CACOPHONY of ideas!Other articles discussed: https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/stephaniemcneal/influencers-quitting-instagramhttps://lynzyandco.com/why-i-am-leaving-instagram/

Today, Ruby and I discuss why we prefer The Real World over creating Reels, and why it's been so hard for me to take a break from social media. You can read my Medium article on the same topic here: https://medium.com/the-narrative-arc/i-went-to-thailand-to-take-a-break-from-social-media-816ab0445c74?sk=d908a2ba4236d463eb01f04b47344b22 Single Minded is also having a lil refresh! We hope you like the new format. 

"Junk food has taken over our diets, and it is making millions of people physically sick. A growing body of scientific evidence suggests that something similar is happening with our minds — that they have become dominated by junk values, and this is making us mentally sick, triggering soaring rates of depression and anxiety.”  - Johann HariOn today's episode, Ruby and I discuss our own junk values and compare these to the values we're striving to live by now. We try to understand why it's so hard to do what feels right in a world dominated by success porn (hi LinkedIn), and wonder whether we've set the bar too high - do we need to lower our expectations of life in order to be happier?Links to books & articles discussed: Lost Connections by Johann Hari: https://www.amazon.com.au/Lost-Connections-Uncovering-Depression-Unexpected/dp/163286830XLA TIMES - We know junk food makes us sick. Are ‘junk values' making us depressed: https://www.latimes.com/opinion/op-ed/la-oe-hari-kasser-junk-values-20180121-story.html Digital Minimalism by Cal Newport: https://www.amazon.com.au/Digital-Minimalism-Living-Better-Technology/dp/0241453577/THE ATLANTIC - We're Learning the Wrong Lessons From the World's Happiest Countries: https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2021/06/worlds-happiest-countries-denmark-finland-norway/619299/ 

A lot happened in today's episode! Here's everything you need to know...  Let's start with Fran & Will's PERFECT First Dates episode: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1EFaUUGxh9INext, we have my FAVE new comedian Jessica Kirson's YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@JessicaKirsonComedyHannah Zaslawski also joined me to chat all about her TikTok dating experiment. Watch her fifty first dates on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@hannahzaslawski

Holly is a modern-day matchmaker and the founder of MATCHSMITH. She joins me today to discuss all things dating apps. She helps clients redesign their dating app profiles to get the right matches for them... And for a select number of clients, she actually does the swiping for them! Holly has reviewed many dating app profiles and knows what works and what doesn't... The questions we answer on today's episode: One of your services is a review of someone's current dating app profile: What are the biggest mistakes you see on dating app profiles?Do you think it's important to design your dating app to attract the right matches as opposed to the most matches?What are your top tips for designing a dating app profile? Is there a formula?You also offer a service where someone can fully outsource their dating app swiping to you - it's like a modern-day matchmaker service! What are you looking for in potential matches? Do your clients disclose to their dates that they haven't done the actual swiping? I'm so interested to hear what you think of dating apps in general: Have they helped or hindered IRL connections?You can find Holly's website here: https://www.matchsmith.com/Her Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/match_smith/

According to Harvard's Happiness study: "Close relationships, more than money or fame, are what keep people happy throughout their lives." But what makes a romantic relationship stand the test of time? What does the research say? I wanted to find out! Here are the secrets to a happy relationship, according to research. I think these will help ANYONE no matter they're relationship status. Let's call these the ultimate green flags: 1. Someone who shares in your triumphs: https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/the-happy-couple-2012-10-23/ 2. A positive mindset & shows gratitude: https://www.happify.com/hd/the-science-behind-a-happy-relationship/3. Healthy shared passions (not obsessive passion): https://www.thecut.com/2018/04/how-to-know-when-healthy-passion-becomes-obsessive-passion.html 4. More positive interactions than negative ones during conflict: https://www.gottman.com/blog/the-magic-relationship-ratio-according-science/5. Someone who believes in you: https://www.psychologytoday.com/au/articles/201901/the-michelangelo-effect 6. Diffusing fights: https://www.happify.com/hd/the-science-behind-a-happy-relationship/7. Friendship: https://www.gottman.com/blog/8-myths-about-relationships/ 8. Kindness: https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2014/06/happily-ever-after/372573/ Harvard study: https://news.harvard.edu/gazette/story/2017/04/over-nearly-80-years-harvard-study-has-been-showing-how-to-live-a-healthy-and-happy-life/

What happens when you don't want to ghost someone after one or two dates?? Linda and I discuss the best way to let someone down if you're not interested. I'm also joined by career coach Leah Lambart to discuss how personality testing can inform your next career change, and how a "portfolio career" might be the best path to more freedom and flexibility. Leah's website: https://www.relaunchme.com.au/Leah's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/relaunchmecareerconsulting/

Kate is a Confidence Coach and meditation teacher who helps women build self-belief to find their direction in life. We answer the following questions on today's episode: What is self-compassion? How does someone know if they're being too hard on themselves?How do you cultivate self-compassion? As part of your workshop, you talk about "real" confidence - how would you define this? How does ego differ from real confidence?You talk about confidence being more about "helping you make life choices that feel genuinely right for you" - how does someone define what their path is? What are the first steps for someone to live more in alignment with their values?Kate's website: https://totalbalance.com.au/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/total_balance/Meditations: https://insighttimer.com/katejames

Ruby is BACK and today we're talking about judgement, including the judgment of others, our own self-judgement and, most importantly, how to live our lives without worrying too much about what others think of us. We answer the following questions:Why are people so judgemental of others?How can we be less critical of others?How can we care less about what other people think of us?How can we live the life we want without worrying too much about how others will perceive us?The Atlantic article is here: https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2021/11/how-stop-caring-what-other-people-think-you/620670/Thanks to our sponsor SkinCeuticals! Here are the products mentioned in the episodeHannah's routine: Phloretin CF Vitamin C Serum: https://www.skinceuticals.com.au/skincare/skin-type/phloretin-cf-vitamin-c-serum/SKC_0002.htmlHA Intensifier Hyaluronic Acid Serum:  https://www.skinceuticals.com.au/skincare/facial-serums/ha-intensifier-hyaluronic-acid-serum/SKC_0003.htmlMetacell Renewal Skin Tightening Cream: https://www.skinceuticals.com.au/skincare/anti-ageing-creams/metacell-renewal-skin-tightening-cream/3606000400429.htmlLinda's routine: C E Ferulic Vitamin C Serum: https://www.skinceuticals.com.au/skincare/facial-serums/c-e-ferulic-vitamin-c-serum/SKC_0001.html A.G.E Interrupter Advanced-Wrinkle Cream:  https://www.skinceuticals.com.au/skincare/corrective-creams/a.g.e-interrupter-advanced-anti-wrinkle-cream/SKC_0016.htmlRetinol 0.5 Anti-Ageing Night Cream: https://www.skinceuticals.com.au/skincare/retinol-creams/retinol-0.5-anti-ageing-night-cream/883140024705.html

I've always wanted to ask Mum how she'd date in the modern world. Would she be on dating apps? Would she pay for the first date? Would she abide by any dating "rules"?When she was single (like, 40 years ago lol), there were no dating apps. There weren't even mobile phones! You couldn't stalk someone's LinkedIn before agreeing to a date. You couldn't even screen their calls. As Mum says, "You just had to make do." Not sure if "making do" is great relationship advice, but there are some (hilarious) little nuggets of wisdom in this episode. 

Janelle is a listener (and fellow podcaster) who sent in a voice note for the loneliness episode, and I felt like her story deserved a whole episode. Janelle has been single for 10 years and recently decided that becoming a mum was more important than trying to meet someone. So she's going it alone! We discuss her endo & egg-freezing, her IVF journey, how she chose her sperm donor, how she'll take her bins out as a single mama and what she's most excited/scared about. Janelle is also documenting her whole journey on a new podcast, Wild Ride. Janelle's podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/its-a-wild-ride/id1690137413Wild Ride Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/wildridepod/

Ruby and I are back for Part 2 of our friendship episode

If you're a Succession fan, you'll know that a marriage devoid of emotional intimacy can make you feel more isolated than being single (aka Shiv & Tom). That's why close friendships can be so vital in combatting loneliness. Because we all need a Cousin Greg in our lives! But making friends as an adult can be hard. Asking a new friend for a walk or coffee is akin to asking someone out on a date: scary...So, Ruby is back to discuss why friendships are just as important as romantic relationships, how to make new friends over 30 & how to let go of friendships that are no longer serving you. 

For so many years, I was under the (false) impression that getting a boyfriend would solved ALL my problems. I thought that once I got a boyfriend, I would sail away into the sunset and be the happiest girl in the world. Oh boy, was I wrong! My guest today, Rav Randhawa, completely agrees. She's been married, and divorced, and has learnt a lot of lessons along the way. She shares her experience of feeling alone and isolated in a relationship and discusses the lasting effects an unhealthy relationship can have on you. Follow Rav on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/ravkr_/

I'm joined again today by mental health professional Lachlan Beaton to talk about taking action... whether that's in life, work or dating. Lachlan believes that it's the little actions that are the most important to transforming your life. It's by taking small steps that you can prove to yourself that you are capable of implementing bigger changes.  You can find Lachlan on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lachlan.beaton/

Shanthi is coming back on the podcast this week to share what happened after she quit her job of 10 years to travel the world. She's now living a digital nomad life carrying all her possessions in a backpack. 

I loved to sabotage things during the early stages of dating. I would write people off immediately over tiny little icks. I had walls up. I would pretend I wasn't looking for anything serious. I would try and play the dating "game", but just seemed to always lose. I really wish I'd met today's guest sooner. Dating coach Jiveny Blair-West is joining me today to discuss how we can overcome the blocks and barriers to forming a healthy and happy relationship. Jiveny is the author of the book How to Make the Biggest Decision of Your Life, which you can check out here: https://www.amazon.com.au/Make-Biggest-Decision-Your-Life/dp/0733645011Jiveny's website: https://datingforlove.com/Jiveny's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jivenyblairwest/

A big thank you to all the listeners who sent in their voice notes about their experiences with loneliness. I was blown away by their honesty. This is definitely one of my favourite episodes of all time, and I hope you get as much out of it as I did. 

Do you ever feel like your life isn't living up to the lives you see on social media? Or that life hasn't lived up to the grand plans you made for yourself as a teenager? For me and my guest today, the answer is yes. I thought I'd be a CEO and married to Leonardo Dicaprio by now. Unfortunately, I'm turning 35 this year, so I am well past Leo's strict 'under-25' girlfriend policy. For many of us, life is more mediocre than what we are presented with online. We aren't winning awards for our work, or turning our side hustles into million-dollar businesses, or working 4 hours a week due to our 'multiple income streams'.So today my sister is joining me to discuss how she found magic in the mediocrity of life. She ditched her social media, went freelance, started investing in her health and became comfortable (dare I say, happy) in being average. Thanks to this week's sponsor Viviology - confusion-free cosmeceuticals by James Vivian at Adore Beauty. Singled Minded listeners can receive a Viviology Vitamin C Serum Deluxe Mini 10ml with every Viviology purchase. Use code SINGLEMINDED. Valid until 4 May 2023. T&Cs apply. https://www.adorebeauty.com.au/viviology.html

Dr Lurve is back! We luuuurved her last episode so much, we asked her to return to the podcast to answer your most asked questions. She is a love and relationship expert with a treasure trove of practical dating advice. Here's what we chat about on today's episode:Can I still meet someone if I delete my dating apps? How? I've been single long-term and have given up on meeting someone. What can I do to change my mindset? I don't want to give up hope! I don't seem to have a connection with anyone I go on a date with. Do I need to go on more dates with someone before writing them off? Dating makes me really anxious & I would rather just stay home than put myself through it. What should I do to get myself out there more? The constant rejection on dating apps is hurting my self-esteem. Is there a way I can soften the blow? I always seem to date people who aren't ready for a relationship. What signs can I look out for that someone is ready for a serious relationship?Is there a way to start a more meaningful conversation on a dating app that doesn't just fizzle? You can find Dr Lurve here: https://www.drlurve.com/And on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr.lurve/Thanks to this week's sponsor Viviology - confusion-free cosmeceuticals by James Vivian at Adore Beauty. Singled Minded listeners can receive a Viviology Vitamin C Serum Deluxe Mini 10ml with every Viviology purchase. Use code SINGLEMINDED. Valid until 4 May 2023. T&Cs apply. https://www.adorebeauty.com.au/viviology.html

After she got divorced, Beth made the decision to stay single forever. But life has a funny way of not working out how you think it will. After her divorce, Beth made the decision to donate her eggs. During her last counselling session with the couple she had chosen (which is required during the process), she signed away her DNA.  I don't want to give away the whole story, so I'll leave it there!But truly, it's an incredible story of Beth's unconventional path to motherhood. Thanks to this week's sponsor Viviology - confusion-free cosmeceuticals by James Vivian at Adore Beauty. Singled Minded listeners can receive a Viviology Vitamin C Serum Deluxe Mini 10ml with every Viviology purchase. Use code SINGLEMINDED. Valid until 4 May 2023. T&Cs apply. https://www.adorebeauty.com.au/viviology.html

MAFS: You either love it or hate it. I LOVE IT. My boyfriend hates it. Can our relationship survive another season? Hopefully! This week, I'm sitting down with Linda (akka mum) to discuss everything I've learnt about dating from Married at First Sight (akka MAFS). It seems that dating icks are really just a defence mechanism to protect ourselves from not getting hurt. Mind. Blown. So the real question is: are you ready to do your own at-home MAFS experiment?  Thanks to this week's sponsor Viviology - confusion-free cosmeceuticals by James Vivian at Adore Beauty. Singled Minded listeners can receive a Viviology Vitamin C Serum Deluxe Mini 10ml with every Viviology purchase. Use code SINGLEMINDED. Valid until 4 May 2023. T&Cs apply. https://www.adorebeauty.com.au/viviology.html

This sums up the social media dilemma for me...I met this week's podcast guest on social media, and since forming a friendship online, we now send voice notes (aka mini podcasts) to each other about how much we hate social media. I never would've connected with Melissa if it wasn't for social media, yet a lot of our conversations are about how social media is negatively affecting our mental health.  In one of our voice note convos, Melissa said she'd had the realisation that her mental health would be better off without social media. And I said, "Me too." But in a world where it's normal to share the minutiae of our lives online (and a world where many of us use social media for work), is there a way for us to co-exist with social media and not be anxious?CAN COGNITIVE BEHAVIOURAL THERAPY SAVE US??We decided to bring our voice note conversations to an actual podcast episode. We don't solve the world's social media problems, but it was cathartic.  It's nice to know I'm not the only one that compares my life when scrolling through Insta feeds.  And hopefully, any anxious brains listening will get something out of the convo with Melissa, even if it's just to feel less alone.Melissa's Instagram (lol at the irony... but seriously she's one of my fave people to follow on Insta!): https://www.instagram.com/melissamason_/Melissa's article on Refinery29: https://www.refinery29.com/en-gb/is-social-media-ruining-our-holidays-vacationsAnd the CBT Workbook I mentioned: https://www.amazon.com.au/CBT-Workbook-Mental-Health-Evidence-Based/dp/1647398053Thanks to this week's sponsor Viviology - confusion-free cosmeceuticals by James Vivian at Adore Beauty. Singled Minded listeners can receive a Viviology Vitamin C Serum Deluxe Mini 10ml with every Viviology purchase. Use code SINGLEMINDED. Valid until 4 May 2023. T&Cs apply. https://www.adorebeauty.com.au/viviology.html

Today I'm chatting with my friend Lachlan Beaton, a mental health professional who decided to make a series of radical life changes to live the life he always wanted. The journey to where he is now wasn't linear. It didn't all happen at once. It took years and years. And a lot of hard work. His story is so inspiring, and it shows that it's never too late to take a new path. He shows us that you can have a radical change in outlook, and step by step, you can move towards a life that feels more aligned with your values. Anything is possible: he changed careers in his 40s, he sold his house and downsized, he works part-time, he stopped drinking and got into fitness, he lives part-time in Thailand AND he's having fun dating. If you feel like the  status quo isn't for you, you NEED to listen to Lachlan's story.  You can find Lachlan on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/lachlan.beaton/Thanks to this week's sponsor Viviology - confusion-free cosmeceuticals by James Vivian at Adore Beauty. Singled Minded listeners can receive a Viviology Vitamin C Serum Deluxe Mini 10ml with every Viviology purchase. Use code SINGLEMINDED. Valid until 4 May 2023. T&Cs apply. https://www.adorebeauty.com.au/viviology.html

2021 was a bad year. I could blame COVID, but that would be a lie. I had been single for a very long time. It had been fun and fancy-free... Until it wasn't anymore. In 2020, I admitted I wanted something more serious... but ALAS... It seemed that everyone on dating apps wanted ethical non-monogamy. I was not going to be on dating apps FOR A DECADE. No way. So, what was a monogamous girl to do??I decided to run away to Thailand. I grieved for the life I'd never have... My frozen eggs would forever stay frozen. It was the loneliest time of my life. I had given up on love (I can't believe I just said that out loud). But what's that saying? It's always the darkest before you delete your dating apps. Or is it the dawn? Whatever it is, it's true... Thanks to this week's sponsor Viviology - confusion-free cosmeceuticals by James Vivian at Adore Beauty. Singled Minded listeners can receive a Viviology Vitamin C Serum Deluxe Mini 10ml with every Viviology purchase. Use code SINGLEMINDED. Valid until 4 May 2023. T&Cs apply. https://www.adorebeauty.com.au/viviology.html

A very special episode with one of my good friends, Shanthi. Here are the questions we answer in this episode:My sister calls what you did "blowing your life up." You ended your engagement, quit your job & packed up your apartment to go travelling. Why did you decide to make such a drastic life change? What was it like becoming single again after 7 years? How has dating changed? What have been the highs and the lows? I've seen you have a lot of success on dating apps. What do you put that down to? You were at Adore for 10 years, then you decided to quit with no job lined up... what made you decide to do that? Was it something you took a long time to consider, or you just woke up one day? You're taking 5 months off... What's your plan? You're in your mid/late 30s and from what I can see, your life is just beginning. You don't seem to be fazed by the usual 30s pressures. What changed for you? What excites you most about being single & unemployed? Usually, we place negative connotations on both of these things, but you seem so excited by it.

We don't talk a lot about The Business World on this podcast, but after reading Erika's blog posts about building her brand, I just knew I had to interview her!! Here's an excerpt:  "I was involved two businesses/brands that grew quickly and warped my idea of reality when it came to status, wealth, success, and values. 5 years in, I chose to leave a brand that just announced a 100 million dollar valuation, and start again. I too, sometimes wonder if I'm crazy."The questions we answer on this episode: I'd love to hear about your business journey - from leaving your previous startup to creating your own brand, FluffWatching you from the outside, I see you as following your own path in life; it's like you just want to live your most authentic life. Am I reading that right? You run a very values-driven business, and you've written about how tough it can be in a world driven by profits. Why was it important for you to do this? What are the pros and cons of doing this?We've both been in the beauty industry for a little while, but your approach to beauty at Fluff is quite unique. Can you tell me about Fluff's approach to beauty?You've written that you're not where your friends are (marriage, babies, houses). I'm not either! How do you feel about that? Has your definition of "success" changed with age?And what's next for you in life and business? Discover Fluff: https://www.itsallfluff.comFollow Erika on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/erikageraertsErika's Medium blog: https://erikaisfluff.medium.com/

IT'S OUR 69TH EPISODE!! So that calls for an episode about s.e.x. Today I'm joined by sex coach Georgia Grace to answer your questions on libido. The questions we answer on this episode: What actually is libido?This was actually a listener-requested episode - someone wrote in and wanted this topic covered: "Guys who have a low sex drive... It's really common." Is it a myth that all men have high libidos? Is it a myth that women have lower libidos?Does your libido go up and down? Are there people who naturally have a higher sex drive?Why do people joke that married people or people in long-term relationships stop having sex? Is there some truth to that?Can couples get the "spark" of the honeymoon period back? What tips do you have?If a couple has a mismatched libido and it's causing them stress, what can they do?Finally, another listener question: "How do I bring more spice to the bedroom without upsetting my partner. Together 10 years"You can find Georgia on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/gspot._/

I want to tell you a story...A few years ago I discovered a box of my great-great aunt's love letters. They were written by a Danish ship captain. The letters spanned a 13-year period. 13 years!!! Imagine persisting with someone on a dating app for 13 years? You're lucky if you get a 0.13-second glance.In one letter he wrote: If only you and I could meet there, it would be vonderful.Aren't love letters just vonderful? Ugh... let's bring them back! So, this episode is all about old-school romance. I'm joined by a special guest who tells the most magical story, and I hope it offers some inspiration to rediscover an old-school kind of romance from the days before dating apps.  You can read the article mentioned in the podcast here: https://medium.com/hello-love/magic-happens-just-not-on-dating-apps-3714d4ef8ea7?sk=b9c36f5ad176117c21ba310407f0567e

Someone recently messaged me saying, "I'm in a complete life rut at 29… single, which I never thought would bother me but I feel very lonely." She asked, "Where's the real shit?" She said a lot of the content out there is all about finding yourself and loving yourself, but that's not very practical and it doesn't really solve the problem. So let's get to the real shit... The questions we answer on today's episode: What is loneliness? What does it feel like?What are the stats on loneliness? What's my experience with loneliness?And how I survived feeling lonely while single?

Dee Salmin is the host of Triple J's The Hookup podcast, and she recently wrote this article about why hot, successful women aren't getting any matches on dating apps: https://www.abc.net.au/triplej/programs/the-hook-up/why-you-might-not-be-getting-matches/13901508AND SO I HAD TO ASK WHY! So we sat down to get to the bottom of it.  You can find Dee on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/dee.salminThanks to Novo Shoes for being our sponsor. You can use the discount code SINGLEMINDED20 at novoshoes.com.au

Before we get into this week's episode... WE'RE ON PATREON! We'll be releasing bonus episodes on the Single Minded Private Podcast every fortnight. You can also leave us a very much appreciated tip to help us continue to produce free episodes. Sign up here: https://www.patreon.com/singleminded Someone sent me a message on Insta recently saying that I was glowing... And I said it was because I was "happily unmarried". It caused quite the stir! So this week, I'll be unpacking why I'm so happy being unmarried with my friend Rav (who is happily divorced). I start by giving Rav a history lesson on marriage, and then we answer the following questions: What advice would we give to our younger selves about marriage?How do we feel about being in our 30s and unmarried?Are there any feelings of disappointment about not being married? Do Instagram wedding photos ever make us feel like we're missing out?Do we think it's better to wait to get married?Rav's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ravkr_/ Rav's podcast: https://linktr.ee/flikeagirlThanks to Novo Shoes for being our sponsor. You can use the discount code SINGLEMINDED20 at novoshoes.com.au

If you're over hookup culture and want to build a deeper connection with someone, this is the episode for you! Today I chat with Love & Relationship Expert, Dr Lurve about how to sloooow down with dating so that you can build a connection first. The questions we answer in this episode: What are the pros & cons of modern dating (dating apps in particular)?It seems that dating has become a bit of a numbers game - should we be looking at quality over quantity? What is the "slow dating" trend?Is "slow dating" the antidote to hookup culture?There are a lot of dating rules (who pays, when it's appropriate to sleep with someone, etc). I recently dated someone at a much slower pace and felt the connection was a lot stronger by the time we did sleep together. Do you think we all need to just slow down & get to know each other first?What would be your top tips for slow dating? Is boundary-setting important? Do you need to be honest upfront that you're going to be spending more time getting to know the other person?What are your dating predictions for the future?You can follow Dr Lurve on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/dr.lurve/ Dr Lurve's website:  https://www.drlurve.com/Dr Lurve's podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/between-the-sheets-with-dr-lurve/id1480610277

I'm joined this week by comedian and podcaster Bianka to chat about the sexual awakening she had when she got sober 3 years ago. We also touch on ethical non-monogamy, sober dating, being lovesick, and embracing those first-date nerves.  Bianka's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/biankaismailovski/Bianka's podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/damsel-undistressed/id1535867660

Dr Rachel Menzies is a clinical psychologist based in Sydney. She specialises in treating fears of death, anxiety and depression using CBT.

Meeting IRL... A thing of the past? Well not for the listeners who sent in their stories of how they met their partner IRL. Linda and I are summarising all the ways to meet someone IRL, but also some tips for striking up a conversation, without feeling the pressure to be flirty. 

This week I am joined by my American friend Malia, who moved to Australia for love. She has one of the best meet-cute stories I've ever heard. As someone that is currently navigating a long distance relationship, this did kinda turn into a personal therapy session for me.YOU'LL ALSO GET AN EXCLUSIVE UPDATE ON THE CANADIAN!  

I'm joined by a very special co-host today to talk about ALL THINGS WORK. The questions we're answering are: - Why did you decide to quit your job after lockdowns?- Why did taking a 2 month break from work help refresh you?- Why you've decided to try a career change?- How did you negotiate a 4-day work week?

Just when you thought you'd given up on dating... you go to Thailand and meet a mysterious man. Today, Linda is asking all the tough questions on my holiday romance. We also discuss dating post-pandemic, and why I'd all but given up after YET ANOTHER flakey guy on a dating app. 

BUT ARE YOU HAPPY?! Today I'm joined by Lachlan Beaton who simplified his life to find more joy and happiness. He got everything he thought he wanted (big house, big salary, etc) but found himself miserable. Then came the breakdown, or what Brene Brown calls "the awakening". It. Is. Inspiring. The questions we answer on this episode: You sent me a really great quote on Instagram called "Old Happy" - can you explain what this is all about?Do you feel you had an awakening to the whole "Be successful, make money, be productive" messaging? What happened? What is your "New Happy"?Because this is a dating podcast, let's get the goss on your love life to wrap up!  Find Lachlan on Instagram at @lachlan.beaton

BUT WILL WE?! Today I am joined again by Rav to chat about body image and how dating (and in her case, marriage) has affected the way we feel about our bodies. The questions we answer on this episode: How did you feel about your body growing up?How did the media influence how you felt about your body?How did dating and relationships later influence how you felt about your body?Do you only date when you're at your "goal" weight?What's your relationship like with your body now? How has it changed over time?You can find Rav over on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ravkr_