Podcasts about Dissociative

We speak with survivor Nichole Willden about high demand religion and culty-ness.Nichole's book:  Obscured PassagesLinks: website--nicholemwillden.comsocials--@nicholemwilldenSubstack HERE.The website is HERE.Our website is HERE:  System Speak Podcast.You can submit an email to the podcast HERE.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  Once you are in, you can use a non-Apple device or non-safari browser to join groups HERE. Once you are set up, then the website and app work on any device just fine.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, movie groups, social events, and classes.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us! Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We speak with survivor Nichole Willden about high demand religion and culty-ness.The link to the original dissertation research on the BITE (Behavior, Information, Thought, and Emotional Control) model by Steven Hassan is HERE.Links: website--nicholemwillden.comsocials--@nicholemwilldenSubstack HERE.The website is HERE.Our website is HERE:  System Speak Podcast.You can submit an email to the podcast HERE.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  Once you are in, you can use a non-Apple device or non-safari browser to join groups HERE. Once you are set up, then the website and app work on any device just fine.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, movie groups, social events, and classes.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us! Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Send me a DM here (it doesn't let me respond), OR email me: imagineabetterworld2020@gmail.comToday I'm honored to have back on the show for a second time: Masonic and satanic ritual abuse, MK ULTRA and child trafficking survivor, overcomer and whistleblower, qualified Survival Instructor, Instructor for Hostile Environment Awareness Training, former alpine climber, Tibetan medicine practitioner, adventure sport instructor, outdoor lover, my new friend, and all around badass and inspiration, Lou Born on August 8 - or 8/8, a date symbolically significant in the esoteric circles that would shape her early life, Lou emerged into a world steeped in spiritual and occult influences. Her family's bloodline, tracing back to early British royalty, Danish ancestry, and historical figures like Odin and Freya, marked her as a target for exploitation by secret societies, including Masonic and military networks. Unbeknownst to her as a child, this lineage, combined with her innate psychic abilities, would thrust her into a hidden world of ritualistic abuse and mind control programming.Lou's earliest years were shrouded in dissociation, a coping mechanism that veiled her memories until age nine. It was during a live TV appearance on a British talk show, Kilroy, that she first realized she had no recollection of her childhood - a stark revelation that her mind had locked away years of trauma. Raised in South London, Lou's home was a paradox of spiritual allure and dark undercurrents. Her mother, a spiritual channeler, practiced yoga, healing, and automatic writing, influenced by esoteric figures like Steven Jenkins, a Mongolian Buddhist and author, and Andrew Barti, a Grandmaster of the Knights of Malta - who was a frequent visitor to her home and one of her abusers - presenting himself as charitable while orchestrating ritualistic abuse of children behind the scenes. Her father - who was former Merchant Navy, worked at Shirley Oaks Children's home as a maintenance worker and builder, and was a former model with celebrity friends like David Prowse who played Darth Vader in Star Wars. This only added to the complicated family dynamics.Lou's earliest years were shrouded in dissociation, a coping mechanism that veiled her memories until age nine. It was during a live TV appearance on a British talk show, Kilroy, that she first realized she had no recollection of her childhood - a stark revelation that her mind had locked away years of trauma. Her childhood was punctuated by fragmented memories of horrific rituals - being tied up, hung upside down, subjected to electric shocks, and submerged in a cold water tank with a dead body. These experiences, often conducted in underground tunnels and other conspicuous locations, were part of a sophisticated, governmental programming system linked to Masonic lodges and military bases. CONNECT WITH LOU:Twitter: https://x.com/LouiseBrookes8CONNECT WITH EMMA / THE IMAGINATION: YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@imaginationpodcastofficialRumble: https://rumble.com/c/TheImaginationPodcastEMAIL: imagineabetterworld2020@gmail.com OR standbysurvivors@protonmail.comMy Substack: https://emmakatherine.substack.com/BUY ME A COFFEE: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/theimaginationAll links: https://direct.me/theimaginationpodcastRIFE TECHNOLOGIES: https://realrifeteSupport the show

We speak with survivor Nichole Willden about high demand religion and culty-ness.Links: website--nicholemwillden.comsocials--@nicholemwilldenSubstack HERE.The website is HERE.Our website is HERE:  System Speak Podcast.You can submit an email to the podcast HERE.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  Once you are in, you can use a non-Apple device or non-safari browser to join groups HERE. Once you are set up, then the website and app work on any device just fine.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, movie groups, social events, and classes.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us! Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We speak with survivor Nichole Willden about high demand religion and culty-ness.Links: website--nicholemwillden.comsocials--@nicholemwilldenSubstack HERE.Our website is HERE:  System Speak Podcast.You can submit an email to the podcast HERE.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  Once you are in, you can use a non-Apple device or non-safari browser to join groups HERE. Once you are set up, then the website and app work on any device just fine.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, movie groups, social events, and classes.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us! Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We get an email about welcoming new people to the community, and have lots to say.Our website is HERE:  System Speak Podcast.You can submit an email to the podcast HERE.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  Once you are in, you can use a non-Apple device or non-safari browser to join groups HERE. Once you are set up, then the website and app work on any device just fine.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, movie groups, social events, and classes.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us!Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

La fugue dissociative est un trouble psychologique rare mais spectaculaire, classé dans les troubles dissociatifs par le DSM-5 (Manuel diagnostique et statistique des troubles mentaux). Elle se caractérise par une perte soudaine de mémoire, souvent associée à un départ inattendu de son domicile ou de son environnement habituel, sans que la personne ne se rende compte de ce qu'elle fait. Elle peut aller jusqu'à adopter une nouvelle identité et mener une nouvelle vie, sans souvenir de sa vie passée.La fugue dissociative survient généralement à la suite d'un événement traumatique ou d'un stress psychologique intense : un deuil, un divorce, une agression, un conflit personnel profond. Face à une douleur émotionnelle insupportable, l'esprit semble littéralement « fuir » pour se protéger, en mettant la mémoire en pause. Il s'agit donc d'un mécanisme de défense extrême, qui découpe l'expérience consciente en fragments pour éviter de faire face à la réalité.Pendant une fugue, la personne agit souvent de manière socialement normale : elle peut prendre un train, réserver une chambre d'hôtel, trouver un emploi, entamer des conversations. C'est ce qui rend ce trouble si difficile à repérer sur le moment. Ce n'est que lorsqu'elle est confrontée à son passé, ou lorsqu'elle retrouve spontanément la mémoire, qu'elle réalise l'amnésie. Le retour à la conscience peut être brutal, et s'accompagner de grande confusion, voire d'anxiété ou de honte.Les études sur le sujet sont rares, car le phénomène est peu fréquent. Selon le Merck Manual, la fugue dissociative concerne moins de 0,2 % de la population générale. Elle semble plus fréquente chez les personnes ayant déjà des troubles dissociatifs, ou ayant subi des traumatismes précoces (comme des abus dans l'enfance). Elle a également été observée chez certains soldats après des combats, ou chez des victimes de catastrophes naturelles.Contrairement à ce que l'on pourrait croire, la fugue dissociative n'est ni feinte, ni volontaire. Elle diffère aussi de l'amnésie simple : ici, l'amnésie est combinée à un comportement actif de fuite ou de réinvention de soi.Le traitement repose sur une approche psychothérapeutique, souvent avec une thérapie cognitive ou une thérapie basée sur les traumatismes. L'objectif est d'identifier le facteur déclencheur, de restaurer les souvenirs, et de renforcer les mécanismes d'adaptation du patient.En résumé, la fugue dissociative est un effacement temporaire de soi, une tentative inconsciente de fuir l'insupportable. Elle nous rappelle la puissance de l'esprit à se défendre — parfois en s'effaçant lui-même. Hébergé par Acast. Visitez acast.com/privacy pour plus d'informations.

We look at the next chapter in Laura Brown's book.Our website is HERE:  System Speak Podcast.You can submit an email to the podcast HERE.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  Once you are in, you can use a non-Apple device or non-safari browser to join groups HERE. Once you are set up, then the website and app work on any device just fine.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, movie groups, social events, and classes.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us! Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

A Safety Belt for Staying Afloat in the Turbulence of Organized and Extreme AbusePresenters: Valerie Sinason, Emma Sunshaw, Faige Flakser & Susan HykesDate: September 18, 2025 | 3:00 PM - 8:00 PM US Eastern TimeEmmaS Portion:  High Demand Religion (Noon Pacific / 3pm Eastern)Register HERE... or as part of the 2025 Webinar Pass. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We read and respond to listener emails, specifically about questions regarding depersonalization and also how memory works.Our website is HERE:  System Speak Podcast.You can submit an email to the podcast HERE.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  Once you are in, you can use a non-Apple device or non-safari browser to join groups HERE. Once you are set up, then the website and app work on any device just fine.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, movie groups, social events, and classes.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us! Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We share a family update, including the impact of the first month of political changes.Our website is HERE:  System Speak Podcast.You can submit an email to the podcast HERE.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  Once you are in, you can use a non-Apple device or non-safari browser to join groups HERE. Once you are set up, then the website and app work on any device just fine.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, movie groups, social events, and classes.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us! Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We share an attachment wound metaphor from the scary movie, which we do not discuss in detail.Our website is HERE:  System Speak Podcast.You can submit an email to the podcast HERE.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  Once you are in, you can use a non-Apple device or non-safari browser to join groups HERE. Once you are set up, then the website and app work on any device just fine.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, movie groups, social events, and classes.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us! Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We do more Star Wars therapy.Our website is HERE:  System Speak Podcast.You can submit an email to the podcast HERE.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  Once you are in, you can use a non-Apple device or non-safari browser to join groups HERE. Once you are set up, then the website and app work on any device just fine.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, movie groups, social events, and classes.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us! Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Send me a DM here (it doesn't let me respond), OR email me: imagineabetterworld2020@gmail.comToday I'm honored to have back on the show for a second time: MK ULTRA, satanic ritual abuse, and organized abuse survivor, overcomer and thriver, loving mother, published writer and author, content creator and podcaster, Physician and Radiologist turned activist, Founder of the Angel Coalition and Co-Founder of Women and Children First and the Babushka Brigade, Star Fort enthusiast, award winner of the University of Washington School of Medicine's prestigious Humanitarian Award, and absolute inspiration: Dr. Juliette EngelA little bit about Juliette in case you missed her first episode or if you're new here: Born in into a family entangled with OSS/CIA/NSA operatives, Juliette's childhood was stolen by the CIA's sinister MK ULTRA program. At the tender age of six, she was sold by her father into a world of mind control, sexual abuse, and satanic ritual abuse she would later come to know as “Sex Magick.” Subjected to relentless physical and psychological torture, her early years were a crucible of pain, designed to fracture her mind and mold her into a tool for the agency's dark agenda. Yet, within this darkness, a spark of resilience flickered - a spark that would one day ignite a blazing path of redemption.At seventeen, Juliette's courage and instinct for survival propelled her to escape, barefoot and with nothing but her will to live. With no memory of her harrowing childhood due to trauma-forced amnesia, she forged a new life, driven by an inner strength she scarcely understood. She put herself through college and medical school, becoming a respected physician and radiologist. In Seattle, she built a successful practice, her professionalism and compassion earning her acclaim. But beneath this veneer of achievement, her past lay dormant, waiting to resurface.The resurfacing of her childhood memories was agonizing, yet, Juliette transformed this pain into purpose. Her memoir, ‘Sparky: Surviving Sex Magick', and its sequel, ‘Angels Over Moscow', chronicle her survival and her fight against trafficking, earning her recognition as a bestselling author. Her third book, ‘Moscow Traffic', further amplifies her voice as a whistleblower and advocate. Today, we will be diving deeper into Juliette's story and into her experiences of recovering memories, contending with dissociative identities including one in particular named Sparky, healing and diagnosing, not losing hope along the way, and so much more. Juliette's life is a testament to the indomitable human spirit, a story of surviving unimaginable horrors to become a healer, advocate, and a beacon of hope for countless others. Her journey from MK ULTRA victim to change-maker is a powerful reminder that healing is possible, even from the deepest wounds. RECOMMENDED READING - MK ULTRA DOCS:https://nsarchive.gwu.edu/briefing-book/dnsa-intelligence/2024-12-23/cia-behavior-control-experiments-focus-new-scholarlyCONNECT WITH JULIETTE:Website: https://julietteengel.com/CONNECT WITH THE IMAGINATION:EMAIL: imagineabetterworld2020@gmail.comMy Substack: https://emmakatherine.substack.com/BUY ME A COFFEE: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/theimaginationAll links: https://direct.me/theimaginationpodcastRIFE TECHNOLOGIES:Support the show

We share about what is happening in therapy with parts work.Edit note: Jules says the marble jar idea came from Brene Brown.  We have avoided that author and our therapist had not cited that.  So we did not know, apologies.Our website is HERE:  System Speak Podcast.You can submit an email to the podcast HERE.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  Once you are in, you can use a non-Apple device or non-safari browser to join groups HERE. Once you are set up, then the website and app work on any device just fine.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, movie groups, social events, and classes.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us! Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We share about our surprise trip to Seattle.*Edit note: the language test can be either English or FrenchOur website is HERE:  System Speak Podcast.You can submit an email to the podcast HERE.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  Once you are in, you can use a non-Apple device or non-safari browser to join groups HERE. Once you are set up, then the website and app work on any device just fine.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, movie groups, social events, and classes.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us! Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We share an experience at the dentist that felt activating, and how we used recovery to cope in the moment.Our website is HERE:  System Speak Podcast.You can submit an email to the podcast HERE.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  Once you are in, you can use a non-Apple device or non-safari browser to join groups HERE. Once you are set up, then the website and app work on any device just fine.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, movie groups, social events, and classes.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us! Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We share from How It Works.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, a lego group, movie groups, and social events.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us!  To submit an email to the podcast:    podcast@systemspeak.comContent Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

From ISSTD:ISSTD is thrilled to launch our third annual Ask the Experts Series - Benefitting the Fridley Fund. Register for the AM or the PM series to ensure you do not miss out on a minute of engaging and informal discussion with seasoned professionals! Individual registration is also open for our first sessions with Emma Sunshaw.All proceeds from this series support the Fridley Fund, which helps students pursuing a mental health related degree who may otherwise be unable to afford it, access essential training in the treatment of complex trauma and dissociation. By registering, you're not just gaining valuable insights. You're directly empowering future clinicians to make a difference in the lives of those they will work with.This series of sessions will not be recorded and is limited to 20 participants for each series. These sessions are for general conversation, not patient specific consultation. Please prepare general questions for the experts, and if you are seeking patient consultation time, you will need to seek that out on an individual basis. Session #1 Expert: Emma SunshawMay 30, 2025 | 10:00 AM - 11:30 AM US Eastern TimeIndividual Session Registration ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We share a conversation with Larry Ruhl about recovery.Note: There are background sounds when an alarm goes off during our conversation.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, a lego group, movie groups, and social events.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us!  To submit an email to the podcast:    podcast@systemspeak.comContent Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We share a conversation with Larry Ruhl about recovery.Link to “Little Bit Culty” episode about differentiating between healthy & culty 12-step community dynamics. You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, a lego group, movie groups, and social events.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us!  To submit an email to the podcast:    podcast@systemspeak.comContent Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We share from How It Works.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, a lego group, movie groups, and social events.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us!  To submit an email to the podcast:    podcast@systemspeak.comContent Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

There's a space between life and death where memory, emotion, and rhythm blur into something unspoken, that's where Vanta begins. “Between Life and Death”, his debut album on IO Records, draws from personal upheaval, pairing stark introspection with glimmers of defiance. The project navigates the tension between collapse and healing, with tracks like “Intrusive Thoughts” and “Void” oscillating between vulnerability and strength. It's a record that doesn't offer resolution, only presence, a sonic companion for those walking their own edge. Opening with “Dissociative Drift”, Vanta wastes no time setting the emotional temperature. The track feels like falling into a dream you half-remember, bleepy percussion echoing like distant signals, submerged beneath fog-thick drones and viscous synth lines. It's less a song than a state of mind, evoking the sensation of floating through murky water, unsure if you're surfacing or sinking. A slow, syncopated pulse guides you, not forward, but inward. “Between Life and Death” arrives on May 13 via IO Records. Pre-orders are live now on Bandcamp. https://soundcloud.com/vanta_techno https://soundcloud.com/iorecs https://www.instagram.com/v_ant_a/ https://www.instagram.com/io.records/ Write up by @gilleswasserman Follow us on social media: https://soundcloud.com/itsdelayed https://linktr.ee/delayed https://www.delayed.nyc https://www.facebook.com/itsdelayed https://www.instagram.com/_____delayed https://www.youtube.com/@_____delayed Contact us: info@delayed.nyc

We share from How It Works.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, a lego group, movie groups, and social events.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us!  To submit an email to the podcast:    podcast@systemspeak.comContent Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We share from How It Works.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, a lego group, movie groups, and social events.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us!  To submit an email to the podcast:    podcast@systemspeak.comContent Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We share from How It Works.“We didn't cause it.  We can't control it.  We can't cure it.”  But we can contribute compassion.The website is HERE.You can join the Community HERE.  Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups.  Message us if we can help!You can contact the podcast HERE.Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We share from the first chapter of Laura Brown's book, Not the Price of Admission.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, a lego group, movie groups, and social events.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us!  To submit an email to the podcast:    podcast@systemspeak.comContent Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Jules and I recap the 2024 ISSTD Fall Virtual Conference.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, a lego group, movie groups, and social events.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us!  To submit an email to the podcast:    podcast@systemspeak.comContent Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We share about discovering How It Works.The website is HERE.You can join the Community HERE.  Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups.  Message us if we can help!You can contact the podcast HERE.Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Jules and I recap the 2024 ISSTD Fall Virtual Conference, sharing about a session that focused on attachment trauma.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, a lego group, movie groups, and social events.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us!  To submit an email to the podcast:    podcast@systemspeak.comContent Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Upcoming courses we are teaching with ISSTD:Advanced Topics in Complex Trauma and Dissociative Disorders  (Level 3 Course) Dates:April 14, April 28, May 12, June 2, June 16, July 7, July 21, August 18, September 8 REGISTER HERE.The Complexities of Complex Trauma (Level 1 Course) Dates:May 5, May 19, June 9, June 23, July 14, July 28, August 11, August 25, September 15, September 29, October 6, October 20 REGISTER HERE. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Jules and I recap the 2024 ISSTD Fall Virtual Conference, sharing about the neuroscience updates from fMRI studies with Simone Reinders.Referenced squirrel video is HERE.You can read about the research of Simone Reinders HERE at King's College.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, a lego group, movie groups, and social events.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us!  To submit an email to the podcast:    podcast@systemspeak.comContent Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We share some of what we learned from the recovery community recently.HERE is the link to the detachment pamphlet mentioned.The website is HERE.You can join the Community HERE.  Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups.  Message us if we can help!You can contact the podcast HERE.Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We recap a presentation Dan Shaw gave at the ISSTD Washington, DC Regional Conference in fall 2024.The website is HERE.You can join the Community HERE.  Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups.  Message us if we can help!You can contact the podcast HERE.Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Hannah Upp, a 32-year-old teacher, disappeared from St. Thomas on September 14, 2017, after a swim, amidst Hurricanes Irma and Maria. She had dissociative fugue, a condition causing identity loss, and had vanished twice before—once in 2008 in New York, found in the Hudson River after three weeks, and in 2012 in Maryland, found in a creek after two days—both times with no memory. Her 2017 disappearance left her clothes and car at Sapphire Beach, but despite extensive searches, she wasn't found. Theories include drowning, fleeing on a ship, or staging her exit, but none are proven. Her mother remains hopeful; Hannah, now 39, is still missing.   Timestamps: Main Content - 9:30 Branch of Hope - 1:07:10   Sources: Kenton, L. (2023, April 3). Chilling note left by missing Hannah Upp points to ‘two options' of what happened to her. . . The US Sun. https://www.the-sun.com/news/7757272/hannah-upp-amnesia-missing-jason-bourne-irma/ Barcella, L. (2021, March 30). What Happened to Hannah Upp? The Mystery Around the Young Woman's Disappearance Continues. A&E. https://www.aetv.com/real-crime/what-happened-to-hannah-upp-the-mystery-around-the-young-womans-disappearance-continues Villines, Z. (2023, September 6). Dissociative fugue: Symptoms and treatment. https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/dissociative-fugue Ashley, M. (2022, January 6). Missing Person Hannah Upp May Not Know She is Missing. Medium. https://truecrimemysteries.medium.com/missing-person-hannah-upp-may-not-know-she-is-missing-88d3d882ba5f Jennifer. (2024, November 14). The bizarre disappearance of Hannah Upp - Jennifer - medium. Medium. https://wherearetheypodcast.medium.com/the-bizarre-disappearance-of-hannah-upp-6367f858ce10 Mystery, M. O. (2023, August 7). The very, very, strange case of Hannah Upp. Mind Over Mystery. https://mindovermystery.com/the-very-very-strange-case-of-hannah-upp/ Join The Dark Oak Discussion: Patreon The Dark Oak Podcast Website Facebook Instagram Twitter TikTok Youtube This episode of The Dark Oak was created, researched, written, recorded, hosted, edited, published, and marketed by Cynthia and Stefanie of Just Us Gals Productions with artwork by Justyse Himes and Music by Ryan Creep

We learn to hold the presence of our therapist even when we are not in her office.The website is HERE.You can join the Community HERE.  Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups.  Message us if we can help!You can contact the podcast HERE.Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Charlottes from the community shares their story of lived experience with us, and we talk about the experience of learning about DID in academia.The website is HERE.You can join the Community HERE.  Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups.  Message us if we can help!You can contact the podcast HERE.Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We give a Now Time update - on everything.NOTICE:  The System Speak 501(c)3 was dissolved at the February 2025 Board meeting due to not having staff to track executive order changes impacting non-profits. Donations are no longer tax deductible. You can READ HERE from the National Council of Non-Profits about the impact of these changes, as well as the response from the Council.  We look forward to future endeavors when things settle!The website is HERE.You can join the Community HERE.  Remember that you will not be able to see much until joining groups.  Message us if we can help!You can contact the podcast HERE.Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Victor Varnado, KSN, and Rachel Teichman, LMSW, read about Dissociative Identity Disorder, a complex mental health condition once known as multiple personality disorder. The episode delves into how individuals with DID experience distinct identity states, often as a response to trauma. With famous cases and media portrayals shaping public perception, they examine what the science really says. Tune in for an informative look at this fascinating and often misunderstood disorder.Full Wikipedia here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dissociative_identity_disorder#CausesSubscribe to our new newsletter, WikiWeekly at https://newsletter.wikilisten.com/ for a fun fact every week to feel smart and impress your friends, and MORE! https://www.patreon.com/wikilistenpodcastFind us on social media!https://www.facebook.com/WikiListenInstagram @WikiListenTwitter @Wiki_ListenYoutubeGet bonus content on Patreon Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We try to process one week post-election.To submit an email to the podcast:    emmasunshaw@gmail.comContent Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We give an update on therapy after sharing our symposium artwork in session.To submit an email to the podcast:    emmasunshaw@gmail.comContent Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We share about symposium recovery - and progress!You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, a lego group, movie groups, and social events.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us!  To submit an email to the podcast:    podcast@systemspeak.comContent Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We share some of what we learned at the McLean presentation at Harvard.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, a lego group, movie groups, and social events.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us!  To submit an email to the podcast:    podcast@systemspeak.comContent Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Jon Cleveland shares with us about psychedelic research and HPPD.Jon's email: jcleveland@mycordell.comYou can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, a lego group, movie groups, and social events.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us!  To submit an email to the podcast:    podcast@systemspeak.comContent Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We read and respond to listener emails.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, a lego group, movie groups, and social events.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us!  To submit an email to the podcast:    podcast@systemspeak.comContent Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We talk with ISSTD clinician Valerie Sinason (UK) about "infantacidal attachment".The "still face experiment" video on YouTube is HERE.The poem we referenced, which we wrote in 2020:In the last week,I watched my 5 year-old daughter's butterflies be born.They came home with usfor quarantine,a gift of hope and peacewhile she herself is dying,while my children miss their friendsand watch their sister fade away.The caterpillars crawledin the grimeas they learned to spin,then hung themselvesfrom the top of the cup.I know the feeling.The metaphor did not escape me,this therapeutic processof freezewhere transformation is required -quarantinedin a glass househanging by a threadnothing the same as it was.Before the chrysalisthere was a shedding of skinI recognized as a shedding of me.For all I have learned the last four yearsabout integration,I thought the debate was betweenbrowniesand fruit salad,as if I would get to choose my last meal.But all of it was grime.So I pretended to grow wingswhile you locked me away.I wrapped myself in dissociationlike a cocoon of worlds inside.I never invited you in here.No one warned me how sticky it was.I watched their backbone start to formlike scalesthat fell awaylike therapytalking away.Therapy was taking away my dissociationwhile I fought to lock myself in it.If you have any heart at all,you want to reach outto reach into touchto help them free the hardened shell.But you cannot.Because that wriggling workis what makes them strongis what sets them freeis what makes meMe.And I knowhow cold and lonely it is in there,in here,where I am,where no one goesno one seesno one knows.You promise wings.You promise freedom.You promise flying free.But all I rememberis the grime.And all I knowis the crawling through filth.And all I seeis that I have hung myself herevulnerablyto be stared atand gawked atand not touchedwhile I am frozenand coldand hanging herenot who I wasand not yet free.You say no parts left behindor lostor abandoned.But I see my shell laying therewhere I once crawled.And these wingsstill stickydon't feel like mine.And I can't yet fly.You flick at my netto show me that I canlike a bird pushing its baby out of the nestand it hurts mebetrays mestings mescares me.Except you don't push too hardand I feel you waitwhile I don't want to leave.I would rather hang myselftherewhere being frozenhas always kept me safe.I am uncomfortablewith so many changesand didn't knowI would come outlooking so differentthan how I crawled in.I cling to the netbecause you taught me how to be grounded.And I have always knownhow to shelter-in-place.I can see the outside worldwhere everyone else lives,but I don't at all likeyou sending me awayto go live there.Because I do not know how to live.I know how to crawl.I know how to hang.It makes me angry at you(even though I am not)when you try to send me awayfrom the place where I hungaway from where my shadow still staysaway from where my shell lies.I don't know if you understandthat still feels like meand the cocoon still feels saferand the sun is still too bright for my eyes.I am drying out my wingsand saying goodbyewhile you unzip my worldto shoo me outso I can flybecause you sayI was meant for the sky.But all I rememberis the grimeand how to crawl.And I don't understandwhy you don't understandthat I don't actually know how to fly.But what I do knowmore than you know I knowis that there is no going backand that I am relievedto have the sticky washed off of me.(I know, I know.You never said I had to leave.But I can't stay herelooking at the shell of me.)Emma Sunshaw, May 2020You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, a lego group, movie groups, and social events.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us!  To submit an email to the podcast:    podcast@systemspeak.comContent Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We discuss “infanticidal attachment” with Jules.The referenced article is HERE.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, a lego group, movie groups, and social events.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us!  To submit an email to the podcast:    podcast@systemspeak.comContent Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We discuss “infanticidal attachment” with Jules.The “weeping camel” video is HERE.The referenced article is HERE.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, a lego group, movie groups, and social events.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us!  To submit an email to the podcast:    podcast@systemspeak.comContent Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We discuss “infanticidal attachment” with Jules.The referenced article is HERE.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, a lego group, movie groups, and social events.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us!  To submit an email to the podcast:    podcast@systemspeak.comContent Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We discuss “infanticidal attachment” with Jules.The referenced article is HERE.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, a lego group, movie groups, and social events.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us!  To submit an email to the podcast:    podcast@systemspeak.comContent Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★