Tracy Crossley's Podcast

Are you physically avoiding someone in your own home? Running to another room when you hear their footsteps? Your body knows what your mind tries to rationalize away. Sometimes we find ourselves in situations where our nervous system screams "danger" even when logically we know we're safe. Tracy gets brutally honest about living with her narcissistic mother and the physiological response that has her literally hiding in her own house. In this episode, Tracy explores: * Why your body reacts before your mind catches up * How childhood patterns show up in adult responses * Living with toxic family members who gaslight * The difference between intellectual awareness and emotional healing "We don't really change unless it's going to benefit us in some way." ~ Tracy Crossley

Are you exhausting yourself chasing dreams that aren't even yours? Twisting yourself into a pretzel trying to become someone you're not? Every year on this planet, you have a choice: become more bitter or grow. But here's the deal—all that trying is actually making you emptier. Stop trying to prove yourself. Start being yourself. In this episode, Tracy explores: * What are you trying to prove and who are you trying to prove it to? * Why "I'll try" is weak energy that keeps you stuck * How to live from your real motivation, not your ego "When you stop trying, you pay attention to the real motivation from your real self—not from your ego, not from your insecurities, not from your state of lack." ~ Tracy Crossley

Caught in a cycle of blaming others for how you feel? You might think self-acceptance comes from others accepting you first. Wrong. That approach builds walls, creates resentment, and slowly kills your relationships. Codependency, anyone? Giving the remote control to your emotions to someone else NEVER leads to self acceptance. In this episode, Tracy explores: * Why you feel resentment rather than acceptance * What is a trigger that leads you to a world of hurt? * How to actually accept yourself. "Where there is judgment, love is not happening in those moments ~ Love of yourself or the other person." ~ Tracy Crossley

You keep ignoring your gut to please everyone else. Reacting to what others want instead of tuning into what YOU need. Sound familiar? When was the last time you actually checked in with yourself before jumping through hoops to meet someone else's expectations? We're taught to react to others, to do "the right thing" according to everyone but ourselves. Your worth becomes tied to how well you anticipate and please the people around you. Meanwhile, your true feelings get buried deeper with each fake smile, each time you say "yes" when you mean "no." In this episode, Tracy explores: * Why we abandon our feelings to meet others' expectations * How "doing the right thing" disconnects you from yourself * The myth of mind-reading in relationships * Three ways you dismiss your feelings daily * Recognizing when you're reacting vs. honoring yourself "As long as you don't give a f*** about your feelings, nobody else will. You teach people how to treat you." ~ Tracy Crossley

Ever notice how you contort yourself to fit what someone else wants? When you play small, hide parts of yourself, or pretend to be something you're not just to have a relationship? You can't have happiness when you're living a half-life. Subservience to an ideal—whether it's a relationship, a lifestyle, or some fantasy version of yourself—is just another prison you've built. Ready to stop contorting yourself into someone else's idea of perfect? This episode will help you recognize where you're sacrificing your authenticity and how to reclaim the real you. In this episode, Tracy explores: * Why suppressing your authentic self guarantees relationship failure * How avoidants develop "imposter syndrome" in relationships * The exhausting pattern of hiding who you are to please others "No one who wants to suppress you and you wanting to suppress you makes nobody happy. Remember that. Happy people don't need another person to make them happy."

Do you carry a burden of guilt and responsibility that doesn't belong to you? Feel like something's wrong with you even when everything in your life is going right? That's the lasting impact of growing up with a narcissistic parent—where their stories become your emotional prison. In this raw and revealing episode, Tracy explores her own journey with her narcissistic mother and the breakthrough moment that finally released her from decades of guilt. Ready to drop the weight you've been carrying? In this episode, Tracy explores: * The guilt that follows you everywhere * Why communication attempts always fail * When you realize it was never your fault * Moving from knowledge to emotional freedom * Taking emotionally risky action "There is not one damn thing I could have ever done as a child or as an adult that she could have been a different person or would react differently. I just saw her in her own little bubble." ~ Tracy Crossley

Something's missing in your life. You feel it. You know it. But you keep telling yourself everything's fine. That gnawing emptiness? The one you try to fill with advice from friends about your dating life or career choices? It's not going away until you face what's really happening. You're trapped in patterns YOU created. In this raw conversation, Tracy digs into why you keep hitting the same walls in relationships and life. It's not about getting more advice—it's about finally seeing the truth about yourself. In this episode, Tracy explores: * Why your emotions keep you stuck in destructive patterns * How self-deception blocks authentic connections * The uncomfortable work of real self-awareness * Breaking through fear to build genuine relationships * Using soul plan readings to uncover your true purpose "Your patterns aren't happening TO you. They're happening THROUGH you." ~ Tracy Crossley

Still blaming politics, society, or other people for your problems? Think a new job, relationship, or president will fix your life? Wrong. In this raw conversation with Matthew Krayton, founder of Publitics and political consultant, he and Tracy cut through the BS of externalization. You'll hear why looking outside yourself for answers is the biggest trap you're setting for yourself. Stop waiting. Start living. In this episode, Tracy explores: * Why blaming others locks you in frustrating cycles * How personal patterns mirror larger societal patterns * The uncomfortable but necessary work of facing yourself * Social media's dangerous role in fueling blame and isolation * Breaking patterns by questioning your beliefs "The only way that you break some of those cycles is being able to have a clear eye toward what those things are and not sugarcoating or not looking at our past through rose-colored glasses." ~ Matthew Krayton

Those past relationships that seem to have a special place in your heart, anyone come to mind? I know putting someone who's no longer in your life into a special place can feel warm and fuzzy, but is it just an escape? When we aren't finding meaning in the present, we often escape—imagining an ex was "the one who got away" or reminiscing about "better times" that weren't actually better. Who were you back then? In reality, yes reality. What was the meaning of the relationship that ended at the time? Believe me, you're not missing out on some magical connection—you're feeling a void in the present. Meaning can be found here in the present, real meaning not a fantasized version of the past. In this episode, Tracy explores: * Glorifying past relationships–why do we do it? * What is truth vs reality? * Why do you want to detach from idealized memories? The importance of fulfilling meaning for yourself. "It feels so much better to be yourself and to be here in the moment and creating the life that you actually want, than it does to be in the past." ~ Tracy Crossley

In this episode of Moving On to a Healthy and Thriving Life, Tracy sits down with Eitan Koter, co-founder and CEO of VIMMI, to unpack the real story behind building a successful company from the ground up—without outside funding and without a clear roadmap. Eitan shares how childhood confidence, a few powerful words from his mother, and a relentless commitment to listening shaped his path from corporate leadership to entrepreneurial freedom. This is not just about business—it's about grit, reinvention, and learning to lead with empathy and intention. In this episode, you'll learn: * How confidence and clarity often come from small but defining moments * Why being lost can lead to the most aligned career shifts * The mindset shift from employee to entrepreneur * What it takes to grow something real—without chasing the noise "Authenticity is non-negotiable." ~ Tracy Crossley

Think you're not playing games in love? Think again. The waiting, the silence, the unspoken rules—it's all part of the game. And the worst part? You're playing against yourself. When dating feels like a power struggle, it's not about them—it's about your own fears and insecurities running the show. In this episode, we're breaking down why love isn't about chasing, proving, or waiting. It's about showing up as your real, honest self. No more strategy. No more guessing. Just real connection. What You'll Learn: ✔️ How dating games keep you stuck in low self-worth ✔️ The hidden ways you sabotage relationships ✔️ Why emotional maturity is the key to real love ✔️ A mindset shift that changes everything "Love isn't a game, but if you're playing one, you're the one who's losing." ~ Tracy Crossleydating with confidence

Feeling trapped? Whether it's your relationship, job, or just life in general, the real prison isn't outside of you—it's inside. Avoidance, fear, and old wounds keep you stuck, convincing you that escaping is the answer. But what if the only way out is to stop running? In this episode, we break down the hidden patterns that keep you feeling stuck and how to finally break free. No more avoiding. No more excuses. It's time to reclaim your power. What You'll Learn in This Episode: * Why feeling trapped is really a trauma response * How avoidance keeps you stuck in self-sabotage * The hidden fears blocking emotional risks * A simple exercise to stop running and start choosing "We try so hard not to get trapped, and yet we trap ourselves in the very act of avoiding it. The real prison isn't out there—it's inside of you." ~ Tracy Crossley

Think your happiness depends on someone else changing? Think again. In this episode, we're tackling the hard truth: no one—not your partner, boss, friends, or family—can make you feel better. The only way to break free from frustration, attachment, and control is by looking inward. Because until you deal with yourself, the same patterns will keep repeating. If you're tired of waiting for others to change, this episode is your wake-up call. Let's shift the focus back where it belongs—on you. What You'll Learn: * Why controlling others never leads to happiness * How to break free from attachment and insecurity * The real reason you feel stuck in toxic cycles * A mindset shift that will change all your relationships "No one is coming to save you. If you're waiting for someone to change so you can finally be happy, you're giving away the one thing that's actually yours: your power." ~ Tracy Crossley

What will make you feel good even when life is delivering thorny roses? Crisis is everywhere these days. Many of you might be stuck in survival mode, clinging to external situations that must change before you feel okay. The real solution? Learning to create your own sense of feeling good—no matter what is going on! These toxic cycles can keep you struggling to feel truly happy or free of anxiety. It's time to stop outsourcing your well-being, especially to people who struggle with their own and start feeling less anxious, and trusting your choices—on your terms. What You'll Learn: * Chasing relationships, success, or control is not the way to abundance * Toxic cycles control you, let's stop it! * Misconceptions about happiness * The mindset that changes everything “You don't ‘find' happiness—you just need to know how to create it. Waiting for something to make you feel good,is giving away control of your emotional state. It makes you powerless.” how ~ Tracy Crossley

You know that person in your life who bugs the crap out of you? The one you keep a list of things they should do differently from your perspective. Well, do you know yourself to that degree too? Here's the deal. How well you know yourself and your operating system can make a difference in the quality of your life. From relationships to work, you are the common denominator. So if you aren't happy with the status quo, listen in. Let's get to the core of identity. Not the labels, not the roles, but who you are. It is when everything shifts—your happiness, relationships, and confidence. Break the cycle of attachment to what doesn't serve you. It's time to stop performing and start being. What You'll Learn: * Why looking for emotional shelter keeps you stuck—let's break free * Beliefs shaping your reality (let's change them) * Feeling at home in your own skin *How to create more joy and meaning Ready to live your life? Hit play. "You're not a label. You're not your job, your relationship, or anyone's expectations. You are an experience. And until you stop chasing validation and start owning who you actually are, you'll keep feeling stuck. So, who are you—really?" ~ Tracy Crossley

Think a healthy relationship is all about effortless love and constant happiness? Think again. Real, fulfilling partnerships aren't built on fairy tales—they require self-awareness, emotional clarity, and letting go of the idea that someone else will "fix" you. Most of us unknowingly carry baggage from childhood, shaping our expectations and reactions in relationships. When drama disappears, old wounds surface. Instead of looking to a partner for rescue, true connection begins when you take responsibility for your emotional world. Key Insights You'll Gain: * Why your partner can't fix you—and why that's freeing. * The unexpected discomfort that comes with emotional stability. * How to stop using blame as a shield and build real intimacy. * Why winning an argument often means losing in the long run. "Healthy grows you into a happier version of yourself." ~ Tracy Crossley

Attachment means you live in an itsy bitsy world, regardless of what it looks like on the outside. You are after a feeling that comes once in a while or never. The feeling of safety or security. This started in childhood. Unknowingly it has limited your relationships, self-worth, and personal growth. Let's scrap these behaviors, pain and feeling like no matter what you are back at it again. You can do it! Key Insights: * Childhood experiences are in the middle of your adult relationships. * Avoidant attachment wants a hot fudge sundae, but leaves the hot fudge off. * Believing in yourself that it can be different is possible. * How to know if you are growing will be answered too. "Only if it affects the inside, and it's how it affects the inside, does it really change your perception of yourself and how you see the world." ~ Tracy Crossley

I bet you think you do most things “correctly; then something comes out of left field knocking you over. The creeping feeling of "not good enough" can be felt. You then look at how you should've been better, did it differently, etc. This whole conversation is self-sabotage. Tune in on stopping the sabotage, feeling good even when there's drama or issues and grow your self-awareness. By observing how you get triggered, wouldn't it be great to stop judging yourself and let go? Key Insights You'll Gain: * Perfectionism steals all the fun! * Don't kick out the negative emotions, learn what to do with them. * Getting out of the armchair and getting to living beyond your inner judge!

Are you stuck in a tug-of-war between two versions of yourself? In this episode, Tracy explores the inner conflict between your "Dr. Jekyll" self—the love-driven, positive you—and your "Mr. Hyde" self—the fear-driven, avoidant you. These two sides shape how you approach relationships, responsibilities, and emotional growth, often without you even realizing it.

Are you your own worst enemy in relationships? Whether it's anxious clinging or avoidant distancing, attachment issues often create cycles of fear and emotional avoidance that sabotage the love and intimacy you crave. In this episode, Tracy dives deep into the hidden forces driving these patterns and shares how stepping into self-responsibility can transform your connections from the inside out.

How easy it is to live a separate life, until you actually realize that's what you've been doing. No one sets out in a relationship to do this, most people start off with the best intentions. Conditioning is responsible for hidden patterns that lead to emotional distance. It doesn't have to stay this way. Whether you want to stay in the relationship or go, there is a better way to live. Let's address what truly matters—how you feel and what is possible!

Do you blame your partner for everything—or do they blame you? Either way, the blame game is not helping. Join Tracy as she explores the toxic cycles of blame, insecure avoidance, and intellectualizing feelings that keep you trapped in crisis. You'll uncover why blame creates distance, blocks intimacy, and leaves you feeling anxious. If you're ready to have uplevel, tune in!

Relationships take work, right? Uhhhhh, not really. But if you grew up believing that phrase, you will create the issue you don't want. Chasing perfection—saying the right thing, doing the right thing—only to end up feeling worse. In this episode, Tracy takes a raw and honest look at how the perfectionism you may deny, sabotages your relationship. You'll uncover why striving for perfection creates pain instead of connection. More importantly, you'll get tips on changing that make a difference, What You'll Learn: * Perfectionism is a mask for deeper fears. * Blaming your partner for struggles keeps you stuck. * Taking responsibility for your own triggers. * Becoming more emotionally available and having it all. "Perfectionism doesn't come from love or confidence—it comes from pain, and if you're bringing it into your relationship, it's only creating more of the same." ~ Tracy Crossley

Relationship in crisis? Here is the first in a 4-part series on changing your relationship from dumpster fire to a real partnership. Sometimes you get the idea that you need to be everything to your partner as a way to save the relationship. All it does is feed into pain and disconnection. Whether you're married, living together, or in a long-term commitment, this series can give you a direction that makes a difference. You might have lost yourself, but let's get you back to have a relationship rooted in love, respect, and authenticity. Key Takeaways from this episode: *Why being your partner's “everything” is a relationship killer. * The role fear and external validation play in damaging connection. * Move from fear-driven to love-driven behaviors for a real bond. "You want to have a remarkable relationship? You need to value what's inside of you. That will be a game changer with every single person." ~ Tracy Crossley

Ever feel like relationships are more drama than connection? That's because we've been conditioned to focus on roles, labels, and being “right” instead of learning how to truly relate. In this episode, Tracy uncovers the real essence of relationships and explores how to create meaningful connections, especially if you're grappling with attachment issues or stuck in toxic patterns. Get ready for practical insights, real-life examples, and a no-BS approach to breaking free from the shame, blame, and emotional barriers holding you back. This is your guide to honest communication, embracing vulnerability, and building relationships that actually feel good. Key Takeaways: *Stop playing the right vs. wrong game and learn to connect without judgment. *Understand how shame impacts your relationships and take steps to overcome it. *Discover the power of honest, blame-free communication. *Break unhealthy patterns by focusing on your own emotional growth. "Relating is about sharing where we're at. It doesn't mean it has to be fixed or that somebody's right and somebody's wrong—it's just about being honest." ~ Tracy Crossley

Ever feel like you're searching for meaning in all the wrong places? “Oh he texted me!” or “ “she said she sometimes thinks of us in the future.” In this episode, Tracy explores how we often give significance to things which really aren't meaningful , especially in relationships, and why it leaves us feeling empty and unfulfilled. Tracy brings some historical anecdote about President Lyndon B. Johnson to illustrate how we can find true meaning.. It's about the connections we create and the values we uphold. Key takeaways from this episode: * Seeking meaning from others' actions or words is a recipe for disappointment * What genuine meaning is within yourself * The difference between superficial and deep, fulfilling meaning. * Gain insights on how to feel good throughmeaning and purpose "You break patterns by getting uncomfortable—real growth happens when you stop avoiding yourself, connect deeply, and take emotionally risky actions." ~ Tracy Crossley

Are you tired of feeling like your emotional baggage is controlling your life? Do you find yourself making decisions based on fear or wishing you were somewhere else? It's time to break free from these patterns and start living authentically. In this episode, Tracy tackles some of the most pressing questions about emotional baggage and self-awareness. She explores how to distinguish between genuine dislike and old patterns, ways to stop making fear-based decisions, and methods for dealing with feelings of dissatisfaction in life. Don't miss this opportunity to gain valuable insights and start your journey towards emotional freedom. Listen now and take the first step towards a more fulfilling life. Key Insights You'll Gain: * How to recognize if your feelings about someone are genuine or influenced by past experiences * Techniques for breaking the cycle of fear-based decision-making * Ways to cultivate emotional courage and embrace vulnerability * The importance of accepting where you are while working towards changeStrategies for feeling your emotions without letting them overwhelm you

What if the universe is constantly trying to guide you, but you're just not seeing the signs? In this episode of "Moving On to a Healthy and Thriving Life," Tracy sits down with bestselling author and spiritual teacher Tammy Mastroberte, who transformed personal tragedy into a powerful journey of connection and clarity. Tammy reveals how to partner with the universe, interpret everyday signs, and move beyond the limits of traditional manifestation techniques. With her grounded, practical methods, she shows how to tap into unseen guidance, shift your energy, and create a life filled with meaning and ease. In This Episode, You Will Learn: * How to recognize and interpret signs from the universe in your daily life. * Practical steps for tapping into the "higher helpline" for guidance and support. * Tammy's four-step method to co-create with the universe and overcome setbacks. * Quick and effective mini-meditations to shift your energy and open yourself to new possibilities. "Stop trying so hard to control every outcome. Ask for guidance, trust the process, and watch how the universe shows up when you least expect it." ~ Tammy Mastroberte

When I was a child, I attracted life based on fear. I was rarely able to have fun, always afraid of what lay ahead. I spent a lot of my time playing fantasy as an escape from the present. In my mind, if I could dissociate from the present moment, I was okay. Or so I thought. But I was only looking for safety. Running and hiding from anything which would trigger me into having to deal with reality. If you have a deep sense of fear that you hope will somehow go away, but you focus on being in a fantasy or not dealing with reality and you're continually fighting yourself and struggling, nothing will change. In today's episode, you'll learn how to change your relationship with fear and manifest less of it into your life. What You Will Learn from this Episode: * How fear acts as a magnet, attracting more of what you're trying to avoid * The connection between childhood experiences and adult patterns of fear * Why avoiding fear only amplifies its power in your life * How to shift from fear-based living to love-based choicesPractical exercises to identify and process your fears

I used to feel this is it–”this is as good as it gets,” feeling empty and unfulfilled in my relationships. Even bored at times [when not feeling anxious]. Do you find yourself constantly trying to be the happiness fairy?, Only to end up feeling lifeless and disconnected? Let's look at the hidden causes behind these patterns and how to be your own happiness fairy. Pay attention to the silent energy drains you allow in your life. It's not your circumstances, it's all in your assumptions. They keep you stuck, believing it'll never change (whatever it is you want to change). Tune in to get some tools to help you set your wings free so you can fly! In this episode, you'll learn: How attachment styles shape people-pleasing behaviors. *Ways people-pleasing sucks you dry. *Why assumptions destroy everything. *Tiny steps to set boundaries and build self-love. "You want to feel full. You want to be filled up. You want to feel a sense of personal power. So it means you're going to get uncomfortable." ~ Tracy Crossley

Are you tired of feeling like an accidental jerk in your relationships? Do you find yourself oscillating between anxious attachment and avoidant behaviors? You're not alone. In this episode, Tracy candidly shares her personal journey as an anxious-avoidant, exploring the complex push-pull dynamic that many experience in relationships. Struggling between the desire for connection and the fear of vulnerability, she dives deep into the root causes of anxious-avoidant behavior, offering relatable insights and practical advice to help listeners break free from these self-sabotaging patterns. Tracy also provides a roadmap for those navigating this challenging attachment style, highlighting strategies for healthier relationships. Whether you're single, dating, or committed, this episode equips you with tools to stop pushing people away and start building the connections you truly desire. Key Insights from this episode: * How childhood experiences shape adult relationships * The role of guilt and shame in fueling attachment patterns * Strategies for challenging emotional unavailability and self-sabotage * Techniques for practicing radical honesty and staying present * Building genuine self-acceptance and lasting relationship change "The most freeing thing you can do as an anxious avoidant is to be honest about your emotional space right at this moment. Stop telling stories and start telling the truth about yourself." ~ Tracy Crossley

Have you ever felt torn between your true passions and the expectations of others? In this episode, Tracy sits down with frequency healer and quantum coach Paget Kagy, who shares her inspiring journey from aspiring actress to spiritual guide. Paget opens up about her childhood dreams of being an artist, the pressure to pursue a "practical" path, and the family tensions that arose as she tried to follow her heart. She recounts the challenges of navigating her "dark night of the soul" and the powerful moment of realization that transformed her life: "You are the creator of your reality." This profound shift led Paget to embrace her true calling as a healer, helping others clear energetic blocks and align with their higher purpose. Tune in for an uplifting and transformative conversation about breaking free from limitations and stepping into your authentic self. Key Insights from Paget's Journey: * The struggle of balancing creative passions with societal expectations * How hitting rock bottom can lead to profound spiritual awakening * The importance of taking full responsibility for your life circumstances * Discovering your true purpose through inner work and self-reflection "Most people think life is happening to them, but the real shift comes when you realize you are the creator of your reality—everything changes when you take responsibility for your energy and your life." ~ Paget Kagy

Have you ever felt like you're stuck in an endless cycle of personal growth, constantly facing new challenges? You're not alone. In this episode, I share my recent experiences with multiple "dark nights of the soul" and how they've shaped my understanding of attachment and personal development. I know that spiritual awakening isn't a one-time event, but a continuous journey. It's like progressing through levels in a video game, with each new stage presenting tougher obstacles. By sharing my own vulnerabilities, I hope to inspire you to embrace your journey, no matter how difficult it may seem. Remember, no one is coming to save you - and that's a good thing. Your journey is uniquely yours, and every challenge is an opportunity for growth. Are you ready to face your own dark night of the soul? Key Insights from this episode: *Understand that multiple "dark nights" are normal and part of growth *Recognize attachments to outcomes and ideas of "arriving" *Learn to be present with uncomfortable emotions *Take emotionally risky actions and what it means for success “Nobody is coming to save you, and that's a damn good thing.” ~ Tracy Crossley

Ever wondered why some relationships feel like a constant uphill battle while others seem effortlessly smooth? Join Tracy and she sits down with dating coach and author Evan Marc Katz to explore the intricacies of modern dating and relationships. Evan shares his journey from aspiring screenwriter to becoming a renowned dating expert, offering a unique perspective on finding love in the digital age. We discuss the common pitfalls of online dating and how to navigate them effectively. Key Insights from Our Conversation: * The truth about "easy" relationships and why good partnerships shouldn't feel like hard work * How our attachment styles influence our dating choices and relationship patterns * The importance of expanding your vision when searching for a partner online * Why consistency and progression in communication are crucial indicators of a healthy relationship * The role of self-worth in attracting and maintaining healthy partnerships Whether you're navigating the complexities of online dating or seeking to improve your current relationship, this episode offers valuable insights to help you find and nurture a loving, lasting partnership. Don't miss out on Evan's free gift - a special report on "Seven Massive Mistakes You're Making in Dating" available at evanmarckatz.com (use the code "freedom" to access). "The best relationships are marked by a lack of anxiety. It's not about finding someone perfect; it's about finding someone who makes you feel safe, heard, and understood." ~ Evan Mark Katz

Ever feel like you're caught in a never-ending cycle of caring too much about things that don't really matter? You're not alone. In this episode, we're going to explore the fascinating world of attachment and how it impacts our relationships, self-worth, and overall happiness. I'll share my personal journey from being consumed by attachment to finding true freedom. We'll discuss why caring about attachment is a waste of time and how to shift your focus towards self-love and compassion. Key Insights You'll Gain: * The root cause of attachment and its impact on your “entire” life * What is self-responsibility and how it helps you break free from attachment * How to stop giving others control over your emotions * Do you know how to sit with your feelings without judgment? Listen in. * Ways to build true confidence and attract healthier relationships "Attachment is a distraction from the lack of love you have for yourself." ~ Tracy Crossley

Someone makes an off-handed remark and you bristle. Or they criticize you and you go into full-blown defensive mode before you dissolve into a million pieces. Why does this happen? Why are you so sensitive to some things while others slide off your back? You react when there is some truth in what was said; a truth you don't want to admit to yourself, let alone have it pointed out by another person. When they call it out you become awash with shame. Shame is a VERY uncomfortable emotion to deal with so instead of feeling it, you deflect, attack, avoid or blame. Maybe your friend says you can't be alone, which is why you're always jumping from one bad relationship to the next. If that's not true, there would be no reaction. Nothing would be triggered inside of you. But if you strike back and/or want to crawl into a hole… that's a sign. Shame is talking and it's time to listen. In this week's podcast we're talking about how to deal with criticism and shame. It's hard to see the unsavory or unlikeable parts of yourself, but acknowledging those parts is the road to self-love, self-acceptance and emotional freedom. When you own your actions and feel the shame, you open the door to healing. No one likes criticism, but it can be an incredibly powerful tool for growth. WISDOM NUGGET (#wisdomnugget) Put on your cape and open yourself to all sorts of criticism. Own what's yours and let it flow through you. Remember you have your magic cape!

Do you choose love, or are you waiting to be chosen? Maybe you believe love has forgotten about you, or it's reserved for other, more “deserving” people. Instead of opening yourself up to it, you ruminate on what you don't have, believing you're being punished by some mysterious force. That, my friends, is playing the love victim. Love is actually a choice, but to get there, you have to see how your actions are working against you to create what you don't want. Shame around being single, negative beliefs that say you're not good enough and fear of abandonment all contribute to feeling like love isn't available to you. And when that's what you believe, you'll pick partners who support that belief; it's a self-fulfilling prophecy. In this week's podcast I'll challenge you to look at your situation as an observer to zero in on what you're choosing to create. Yes, CHOOSING. Having love starts with owning your choices and deciding to make new ones. If everything is a choice, why not choose love?

You consider yourself a strong person. When a challenge presents itself, you tackle it head-on. People come to you for answers because you always seem to have them. You pick others up when they fall. You're reliable and trustworthy. But to be that pillar of strength, you push your emotions aside because you can't be someone else's hero if they see a crack in your armor. And therein lies the problem. We have been brought up to believe that giving is strong and receiving is weak. But that's backwards. Asking for help and being able to receive takes courage. Allowing others to see you as human is what strong people do. In this week's episode I'll challenge you to explore why being “strong” is important to you, and where you struggle to receive. Because you can't give or receive love freely if you're emotionally shut down. When you open your heart to others and allow them to see your vulnerability, you radiate strength. WISDOM NUGGET (#wisdomnugget) The hole in your suit of armor is inside of you. Allow it to exist without being strong so you connect with yourself and others.

How much time do you spend complaining about problems and/or fixing them? You finally join the country club, but you can never get the tee-time you want, the food is bland and all the members are annoying. Or you criticize your co-worker for doing a project “wrong,” then take it over and do it yourself because no one can measure up to you. This, my friends, is classic avoidance. When your focus is on problems outside of you, it lets you off the hook to address what's happening INSIDE of you. When you don't trust life or other people, you work harder to control things, including solving problems that don't exist. And when you criticize everything under the sun, you are resistant to change and growth. These are signs of unhappiness. In this week's episode we'll look at your expectations of others and why they exist. You will also be challenged to stop solving problems for one day to see what happens when you allow life to unfold without judgment or control. Problems are everywhere, but they don't have to become your problems. Instead of focusing on them, you can learn to trust that things will work out without your interference. WISDOM NUGGET (#wisdomnugget) You can be a martyr or problem-solver, but neither will open you up to happiness.

Join Tracy as she dives into an inspiring conversation with Katia Stern, a transformational speaker and bestselling author who redefines what it means to live a bold, audacious life. Together, they explore how to let go of societal expectations, embrace your true self, and live a life that makes you say, "Wow!" Whether you're looking to make a big life change or simply want to feel more empowered in your everyday decisions, this episode offers the tools and mindset shifts you need. Key Takeaways: * Embrace audacity: Learn how to make bold decisions that can lead to life-changing experiences. * Redefine failure: See every experience as a lesson and redefine what success looks like for you. * Prioritize self-love: Understand the importance of setting boundaries and focusing on your own growth. * Empower your presence: Discover how to show up confidently and powerfully in all areas of your life.

People always want to know if they should leave their job or their relationship or whatever situation they are unhappy with. Shouldn't they cut their losses? Isn't it better to chase the next bright shiny object? The problem is, when people DO make that change, they tend to repeat the same pattern in their next job or next relationship, and they become increasingly frustrated that nothing ever changes. So what's the solution? Stay longer than is comfortable. Your inability to stick with situations or relationships long enough to learn from them is what keeps you stuck. Without standing still and being present, you just perpetuate the pattern of cutting bait too soon, chasing what's next, then convincing yourself this is just who you are. It's a false story. In this week's episode I challenge you to stay just a little bit longer than you want to. Because getting excited about the next possibility will eventually wear off and you'll be in this same spot once again. When you're curious about why you're here and why staying is so uncomfortable, you get to some deeper truths that open the window to change. WISDOM NUGGET (#wisdomnugget) Give up the bright shiny object to stay with the old socks until you are deeply moved to grow by knowing what attracted you to the old socks in the first place.

Are you feeling unfulfilled or stuck after a major life change? Join Tracy as she speaks with fashion designer and entrepreneur Tara Marino, where their conversation will reignite your passion and help you rediscover your wholeness. In this episode, Tara shares how embracing all aspects of her identity transformed her pain into purpose. You'll learn how to shift your mindset, align with your deepest desires, and live more authentically by shedding societal expectations. Tune in for insights and inspiration to overcome adversity and fully embrace who you are. Here's what you'll take away from this episode: * How to embrace your multidimensionality instead of compartmentalizing yourself * Tara's mindset shift for transforming pain into profound growth and purpose * Insights on aligning your actions with your deepest desires, even when they don't make "logical" sense * The freedom of shedding societal expectations to live more authentically "Stop asking why and start asking how. How are you going to allow this experience to affect the rest of your life?" – Tara Marino

Think about something in your life that you continually complain about. Maybe it's a partner who won't commit, or your inability to get past a first date. Do you feel defeated and/or concerned you can't have what you want? As with many things, it boils down to a lack of self-worth. If you believed in yourself, you wouldn't worry so much. By contrast, look at the things you don't sweat. Maybe it's constructive feedback at work or squabbles with a family member that happen over and over, but don't get you down. Whatever it is, if it's something you do well or aren't afraid of losing, you're usually not concerned about it. The areas where you DO get wrapped up in concern are what you want to pay attention to. In this podcast we'll look at what you get hung up on, believing it's elusive, and why. Awareness will help you stop the behavioral patterns that can lead to self-sabotage. Because you ARE capable of handing life, even when it doesn't go the way you want.

Ever feel like you're just going through the motions, disconnected from your true purpose? Join Tracy, as she speaks with Chris Cirak, an author, speaker, and meditator with over 25 years of experience in design, tech, business, and entrepreneurship. Chris vulnerably shares his journey from a life of external success to a profound spiritual awakening that shattered everything he knew. You'll hear how he courageously navigated the "dark night of the soul" to emerge as a guide helping others react less and thrive more. With an eclectic background spanning design, psychology, and tech, Chris masterfully translates ancient wisdom into accessible experiences. His unique perspective reminds us that our challenges can become the very gifts we have to offer the world. In this episode, you'll learn: *Practical tips for bringing mindfulness into your daily routines through attention to detail *Insights on embracing your authentic voice and connecting with your true calling *A glimpse into Chris's transformative retreats cultivating inner shifts through conscious living

Do you say to yourself (or others) that you are the prize, and your partner is lucky to have you? And do you actually believe it, or is it just false bravado? Maybe you overcompensate for your true feelings that you don't measure up by working hard to “be the prize.” Or you go the other direction and withdraw because deep down you not only believe you're NOT the prize… you feel completely worthless. Whichever road you take, you're causing drama and sabotaging your relationships. In this week's podcast we explore what's behind this diminished sense of value and how to build yourself up so you feel worthy and deserving of love. It starts with unraveling your shame and self-judgment, then feeling it instead of minimizing it (yep, you've gotta there). I'll walk you through a few steps to get you started. Shame is a tough emotion to allow, but you are more resilient than you think. And it's worth this deep work because once you start believing you really are a gem, you'll attract someone who believes it to. Here are just a few key insights you'll gain: * How to stop creating unnecessary drama and chaos in your life * Techniques for treating yourself with kindness and self-compassion * Steps to take empowered actions that align with your self-worth * Ways to overcome the fears holding you back from living as your best self

Join Tracy and she speaks with Amina Altai, a holistic business and career coach. Amina shares her journey that prompted her to shift her focus to wellness marketing and develop a unique coaching program. Amina discusses her upcoming book, "The Ambition Trap," the conversation highlights societal biases, the power of intuition, and the transformative experience of pursuing one's true passions. What you'll learn in this episode: * How to align ambition with purpose * The hidden biases impacting career choices * Overcoming burnout and chronic illness * Insights from Amina's upcoming book 'We have one life to live; let your soul speak when it comes to work. Give yourself permission because it changes life for you and has a ripple effect on your family, community, and the whole world.' ~ Amina AlTai

Attachment impacts your life, everyday and in ways you may not realize. Drawing from personal experiences and client stories, it's all about YOUR beliefs, you weren't born insecurely attached. Learn what it means to be self-aware, rely on your inner wisdom and change how you feel and the state of your relationships. Let's break free from limiting beliefs and embrace personal empowerment. Get ready to question your feelings, uncover the root causes of your emotions, and move towards authentic living. What You'll Learn in This Episode: * The impact of attachment on your relationships and daily life. * How to distinguish between reactive beliefs and true inner wisdom. * Techniques for managing and understanding visceral emotional reactions. * Become self-determined, build confidence, and respect yourself. * The importance of curiosity and openness in personal growth. * How to break free from limiting beliefs and embrace personal empowerment.

Alana Pratt, an intimacy expert joins Tracy, where she shares her transformative journey from a small-town Canadian girl to a renowned coach! She recounts the profound impact of losing her best friend at 16, which set her on a path of spiritual awakening and self-discovery. Alana also discusses overcoming abusive relationships and the importance of healing trauma. As you listen to Alana's resilient journey, you'll gain: • Insights into befriending your body and emotions • Understanding true intimacy - with yourself and others • Your breakthrough to thriving relationships is inevitable • Doing the courageous inner work to become radiant and whole "Our bodies are conscious, divine, and beautiful, and we need to honor them as such." - Alana Pratt

Feeling trapped in the same day on repeat? You really want so much more, a healthy relationship, work, and a feeling of peace in being alive. But, perhaps you go through the motions, but never truly break free from what feels like a prison.I lived there for years and kept waiting for things to change, but they didn't, til I did. Join me as I talk about the profound shift that allowed me to manifest a life of freedom, joy, and authentic alignment. Discover how four simple words—"I don't have to"—unlocked my prison door, and then the HOW for my next steps. In this episode, you'll discover: * Exercises for getting out of your head, the gateway to miracles * Get rid of fear-based choices and trying to control what you can't * My path of overcoming attachments and becoming curiosity * Stop forcing things from lack and allow the universe to support your desires

Join Tracy as she chats with Summer McStravick who opens up about her early dreams of opera, a health crisis that rerouted her career, and her foray into publishing. Despite setbacks, including a failed literary magazine, Summer's resilience shines through. She candidly shares her journey into personal growth coaching and the creation of Flow Dreaming, an emotional strength-building technique. From working with Louise Hay to authoring "Stuff Nobody Taught You," Summer's story is a testament to adapting and thriving through life's pivot points. What You Will Learn: * Recognizing and embracing life's pivot points. * Techniques for manifesting and achieving your goals using Flow Dreaming. * Using emotional strength and inner wisdom to overcome obstacles. * Real-life stories on reinventing yourself after setbacks. Life will continue to support me. It always has. I can't cherry-pick this and say the good things support me and the bad things betray me. It just supports me, whatever I do. ~ Summer McStravick

Ever notice the nightmare stories in your mind are not a fairy tale, but you somehow attach a “happy ending” to them? Let's get into the profound impact of these narratives on our lives. She talks about the path of the fairy tale shaping our expectations and leading us into a skewed fantasy world. Tracy shares her own experiences, and what to do to have a REAL happy ending. What You Will Learn: * How personal fairy tales create unrealistic expectations and a victim mentality. * The impact of societal narratives on personal relationships and self-worth. * Learn to rewrite the stories we tell ourselves. * Being curious and vulnerable to get what you want.