Breakfast With Your Friends

Brian and Connie discuss Icarus, General Patton, dictatorships, Home Improvement's cancer scare episode, intrusive thoughts, and sociopathy. Brian shares his family's famous zucchini casserole recipe and his new drawing regimen. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers - https://www.silvermansound.com --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Brian and Connie talk to you about tequila worms, Father's Day, surgeries, the early 2000s Spanish techno-pop act Sonia y Selena, Brian's white shorts tragedy, and gibberish Latin. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Brian and Connie celebrate 50 BWYF episodes with a review of newfangled slang, time-traveling Obama, Coxsackie, Ben Franklin's confidence, and the most dangerous game. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Brian and Connie talk about surviving tornadoes, Connie’s vacation, Cajun encounters, punking Hitler, Teddy Roosevelt, Jr./III, PBS, and syphilis. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Brian and Connie debut the BWYF Passport and discuss JC Penny changing rooms, new shorts, bidet logistics, home laboratories, perfume, slime mold, and water computers. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Brian and Connie review the goings on: grad school and its discontents, the COVID-19 vaccine and its side effects, vaccine passports and their problems, and Connie’s flirtation with the four day work week. They also describe Brian’s thighs and hair. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Brian and Connie ponder the topic of anger: what it is, ways to cope with it, and the downsides of pursuing vengeance. They also talk about 20th century dictators, stealing dogs at gunpoint, and the stress Brian experiences as the only employee of the Internal Revenue Service. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie address weight loss and its discontents, including bullying (and bashing back), calories in/calories out, food tracking, soda, and water. They also chat about toy drones, axe throwing, math, cars and car accidents, Trailer Park Boys, and cashew butter. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie return from hiatus to try their hand at a health comedy podcast. Today’s episode focuses on exercise for lazy people: putting your shoes by the door, functional fitness, staring small, and tapping the pharmacy in your brain. They also discuss the attempted fascist coup d’etat of January 6. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com 

Brian and Connie tell you folks about the Nope Zone, accents, psychonauts, the lottery, 2021, Mr. Rogers, Kermit the Frog, and the Ugg brand. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie ponder the secret pouch inside Trump’s abdomen, weird dates, foot sizes, big cities, excessive snow, and selling all of your roommates’ stuff on eBay. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

This episode addresses childhood toys, Gear from “Skin Wars,” hair, jingoistic nonsense, Connie’s career in the Israeli army, nitrous oxide, addiction, self-vaccination, and the perfect crime. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie talk about the Amway legacy, Guiliani as Batman, U.S. elections, types of milk, the German and English languages, information technology, chalk, asbestos, and gym goers. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie discuss numerology, base 9, moving apartments, gold ball wealth, the movie “Coco,” love languages, mice, and hoarding misadventures. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie broadcast (record) live from sunny Upstate New York, touching on topics including cholesterol, Dylan Thomas, chiropractors, Alex Jones, cruises, coffee mishaps, ginger, exercise, and magnetic ribbons. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie chat about the geometry of flat screen TVs, the hidden cost of smoking, excessive skin tags, mid-morning tuna fish snacks, Brian’s ponytail, food industry acquisitions, and nihilism. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Today’s episode covers the U.S. Presidential election, Connie’s resemblance to green beans, the Posse Comitatus Act, hypothetical campaigns for sheriff, the Mandela effect, and the origin of the podcast’s name. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie discuss the conspiracy against Brian, online banking, health care, ambitious sleep schedules, vaudeville auditions, skydiving, risk, security theater, and D.B. Cooper. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie ponder avant garde OnlyFans content, poker, death, Jeffrey Toobin, 1960s pop music, and an entirely new kind of stuffed bear. This episode’s BWYFQ&A addresses graduate school and the fundamental nature of brownies. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie converse about Winamp visualizations, the ongoing brilliance of crows, maths, bagels mediocre and delicious, vitamins and deficiencies thereof, the video game “Hades,” and Princess Diana. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Connie and Not-Connie (Brian) review bumper stickers, excessive food gifts from parents, freak windstorms, and Mike Pence’s status as the third descendent of Count Dracula. This week’s BWYFQ&A re-ignites the Great Sandwich Debate and explores million dollar business ideas. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie reminisce about their youthful misadventures involving hand-me-downs, Nietzschean math teachers, glowing clocks, and grammar textbooks. This week’s BWYFQ&A session addresses carrots, HBO’s “The Vow,” and stew. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie discuss aphorisms, messenger pigeons, and the film “North by Northwest.” During another BWYFQ&A session, they answer listeners’ questions about reading and art/politics, with digressions into Senator Joseph “Asshole Eyes” McCarthy’s House Un-American Activities Committee, VCRs, and subscription services. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

In this episode, Brian and Connie ponder chicken, tea, the bonsai kitten hoax, and nasal cavity mishaps of all sorts. They answer listener questions (BWYFQ&A) about decision making and Dungeons and Dragons, and they outline the pilot of “The Harold and Jeb Show” about a horse attending medical school. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

This episode is a BWYFQ&A bonanza as the BWYF cup suddenly runneth over with listener questions. Brian dons a backwards Sia wig, and he and Connie hunker down to quench the people’s burning inquiries into mathematics, alien life, and sandwiches. They also address Ugg boots, Rockapella, Taco Bell’s ongoing self-destruction, and America Online Instant Messenger. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie review Four Loko, gas station kratom sales, product development lifecycles, comfort stations, crows (again), AFI, and empty cookie tins. This episode contains rampant scatology. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie ponder the food served in hell, TED Talks, bizarre interactions with teens, and the scourge of doomsday news. They issue a public apology (sorry yes sorry) to Utica and conclude by making fun of New York State towns named after foreign cities but pronounced all wrong. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie discuss different types of pizza, Connie’s role as the invisible half man on “Two and a Half Men,” mind reading, contradictory flags, San Francisco, bath salts, hippos, and Steve Bannon’s arrest. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie examine dinosaurs, listener letters and gifts, Moe’s Southwest Grill hacks, wheat germ, plutonium, the tarot, and backpacks. They admit that they put an uncomfortably high amount of love into entertaining you. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie discuss showering, heart monitors, cocaine, naps, conference call tactics, the movie “Fear of Clowns,” and OSHA rules. They conclude with a BWYFQ&A involving naked angel tattoos and obscene neighbors. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Today’s topics include the pros and cons of joining a cult, the strong possibility that there is only one comet, Jefferson Davis (Confederate States of America) versus Jonathan Davis (Korn), penguins, the attractiveness levels of President Lincoln and Conan O’Brien, Taco Bell (again), and asphyxiation. The episode concludes with an unsettling ghost story. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie debut their new cloud service offering, Nothing as a Service (NaaS). They discuss walmart.horse, avocados of death, neofascism, and the U.S. Supreme Court’s 2013 decision in Bowman v. Monsanto Co. They conclude by reminiscing about the rollicking good time that was air travel pre-9/11 and denouncing jingoism and creepy racist signs. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie consider nicknames for BWYF fans, the movie Supertroopers, the US Interstate Highway System, jaywalking, killing Pharaoh ants, Marie Kondo, anhedonia, dolls, and tantrums. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie take on public health policy, vaccines, high-intensity interval training, Judge Judy, Philip Zimbardo, and the tetanus experiments that society will not let Connie conduct. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie address cartoons, 90 Day Fiance, being dock blocked, the evolution of a local protest, skydiving vs. bungee jumping vs. scuba diving, utopian socialism, JNCOs, and aliens. They wrap up with a BWYFQ&A about “girl time.” Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie discuss weaponized ASMR, the prize for the one billionth podcast listener, and extending the U.S. Constitution to Canadians. They marvel at some length over their different pronunciations of words and conclude with a BWYFQ&A session featuring wife spanking, monkeys, and love triangles. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie comment on kefir, the Twinkie defense, imaginary families, the intense feels of “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind,” and all-night Manhattan brownout odysseys. In a segment of BWYFQ&A, a.k.a Brian Saves the World, a.k.a. Dear Brian, they answer questions originally posed to Abigail Van Buren involving fetishes and basement dwelling. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie discuss investments and retirement (in both the Animal Crossing and the non-Animal Crossing economies) and the things that tend to be wrong with STEM people, such as being the Unabomber. They drop some free business advice (you’re welcome), and Brian provides an update on his spiritual quest. They conclude by recounting near-death experiences. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Much like Colonel Mustard in the 1985 film “Clue,” Brian and Connie declare that they “can’t take any more scares” in 2020. They also discuss living for 500 years, replacing New Mexico with Brazil, incomprehensibly demoralizing big box stores, anxiety disorder, Martin Van Buren’s wild quarantine hair, and whether Trump would melt upon contact with water or saliva. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie chit-chat about tornados, Anonymous, roller skating, grease fires, and their parents’ undying enthusiasm for such topics of conversation as egress, face cords of wood, Martin Tankleff, Robert Moses, and window fans. Brian determines that he is an Übermensch. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie debate the merits of Mr. Bean and reveal things they did out of boredom as children (polishing noses, digging holes, etc.). They agree that Michael Phelps is welcome on the podcast, but Jordan Peterson is not, and conclude the episode by reviewing Peterson’s deeply unfortunate 12 Rules for Life. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie discuss failing malls in post-industrial cities, Russian Dolls of Economic Doom, Applebee’s, and Rochester oddities. They hypothesize that, due to the Thruway time warp, Sal Paradise only made it as far as Buffalo (not San Francisco, as claimed). They wonder if the USA should have 3,143 states, if Dick Cheney is technically alive or dead, and what the Pope has up his sleeves. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

This episode reviews ice cream eating techniques, Andy Warhol’s Oxidation Painting, plastic surgery red flags, Knives Out, and stand-up comedy (featuring wildly inaccurate Jerry Seinfeld impressions). Brian confesses his Domino’s Pizza problems, and he and Connie discuss Eat, Pray, Love; Tony Robbins; NXIVM; and Elizabeth Gilbert’s insufferable ex-husband. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie reminisce about old timey information technology and discuss various animals, such as turtles, geese, giant cheetahs, pandas, and crows. They also consider NPR’s hidden agenda, “their Vietnam,” joining the Army, and Ford vehicles. Connie explores her inner child’s anger toward booger-flinging and/or fascist adolescent boys. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie tell public restroom stories before Brian threatens to quit the podcast because he cannot use anonymized download data for ulterior motives. After Brian decides to stay on as a host, Connie gives a scandalous genealogy update involving sisters from the 1800s. They review “How to Fix a Drug Scandal” and gush over defense attorney Luke Ryan, before concluding with dark show and tell, replacing teen poets with AI, and Connie’s new friend Gus (a cat). Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie attempt to podcast while cooking and eating a frozen pizza, leading to excessive use of the transatlantic accent. They discuss honorifics, video games, athleticism, children’s theater, Oswald’s status as “just a patty,” and the germ and miasma theories of disease. After an inopportune Windows update notification, Bill Gates is disinvited as a guest. They conclude with inflation, assassination for drugs, MMA, and 1990s television. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Connie reveals that she is part Southern, that her ancestors had only a tenuous grasp on their own names and dates of birth, and other genealogy research highlights. Brian and Connie chat about poison cabinets, the Pure Food and Drug Act of 1906, hot dogs, vomiting under various circumstances, hair regeneration, and why Slip ‘N Slides are the worst. They wrap up by answering listeners' questions on the first ever BWYFQ&A and disparaging the Catskills. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie address the contrapositive; 4-, 8-, and 32-bit-chan; improvements to Hammurabi’s Code; H+/transhumanism; racketeering; and sleep schedules. Connie upsets Brian by describing cardiac catheterization and drops some Inglourious Basterds and Wormwood spoilers. They briefly consider replacing Brian, as a host, with Bill Gates, but instead they just tell bad date stories. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie spend most of the fourth episode reviewing Sesame Street characters and Microsoft Office products. Other topics of discussion include pig sounds, Generation C, Dunkin Donuts bagels, hypothetical juggalos playing Dungeons and Dragons, and (of course) MKULTRA. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

This episode focuses on two major current events: 1) the COVID-19 pandemic, and 2) Halloween. In addition, listeners will hear tales of casino gambling, getting lost in hospitals, and buying cheap shoes. The practice of eating silver is denounced, and President Reagan is briefly criticized. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com

Brian and Connie get political, suggesting that Trump is made up of column of Oompa Loompas infected with COVID-19, proposing to deregulate the medical profession so Brian can perform Lasik out of his apartment, and endorsing Mike Gravel for President in 2020. They also discuss genocide, literature, Golfers Anonymous, squash (the vegetable), hedgehogs, etc. Music: Floppy Disks by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com