Relationship Recovery Podcast

What do you do when the person you love explodes—and it has nothing to do with you, but you're the one absorbing the damage?In today's episode, I'm talking about a very specific and disorienting experience: the emotional outbursts that often come from people with traits of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). These episodes are not “just” arguments. They're dysregulated storms—sudden, intense, and often terrifying—that leave you feeling blamed, spun, and emotionally shredded.I break down what's actually happening in these moments, why they feel so confusing, and how to begin separating yourself from the chaos. We'll explore:What BPD-patterned emotional storms really areWhy it feels like you're being punished for something you didn't doHow to recognize these moments as trauma responses, not mutual conflictWhat helped me stop spiraling when I was stuck in these cyclesThe difference between compassion and self-sacrificeWhy you're not crazy for being overwhelmed, and why this isn't your faultThis episode isn't about diagnosing anyone. It's about giving language to what survivors are living through—so you can stop blaming yourself, start validating your reality, and begin choosing peace over chaos.If this resonates, I invite you to check out my full Substack series on Cluster B abuse patterns: https://jessicaknightcoaching.substack.com/Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

In this episode, I unpack how abusers flip the script by dredging up unrelated past events, twisting reality, and using guilt as a weapon to derail accountability. If you've ever found yourself defending a mistake from five years ago while trying to talk about how you're hurting now, this episode is for you.You'll learn:The difference between naming a pattern and playing the blame gameHow false equivalency and DARVO keep survivors stuckWhat a healthy vs. abusive response to feedback actually sounds likeHow to stop wasting your energy defending yourself and start trusting what you knowWhether you're navigating emotional abuse, high-conflict divorce, or just trying to reclaim your clarity, this episode is a grounding reminder that your experiences are real—and you don't need to explain your pain to someone determined to ignore it.Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

I explore one of the most disorienting realities of surviving an emotionally abusive relationship: the way each incident is treated like it exists in isolation—when in reality, it all added up.I share my personal experience of slowly realizing that what felt like “stress” was actually a sustained pattern of emotional harm. I walk through the subtle signs—like anxiety, insomnia, self-doubt, and emotional shutdown—that build up over time and keep survivors stuck in cycles of self-blame and confusion.This episode offers validation for the exhaustion you feel, clarity on how abusers avoid accountability by isolating incidents, and a powerful reminder: if you're starting to see the pattern, you already have everything you need to begin walking away from it.Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

I share the story of a client—“Amanda”—who experienced a devastating betrayal that shattered not only her relationship but her trust in herself. What began as a hopeful, grounded connection turned into a traumatic discovery of infidelity and deception. Jessica walks through the emotional aftermath: the gaslighting, the physical symptoms of grief, the shame survivors often carry, and the slow, painful realization that you're not just grieving a person—you're grieving the version of yourself who believed you were safe.This episode is for anyone who has asked: How did I not see it? Why do I still miss them? What happened to the future I thought I was building?Topics covered:How betrayal impacts your nervous systemThe grief of losing not just a partner, but your realityWhat trauma bonding really feels likeThe shame cycle survivors fall intoHow to begin rebuilding your trust in yourselfSupport the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

I'm doing something a little different — I'm walking you through my Emotional Abuse Breakthrough Course: what it is, why it matters, and how it can help if you're stuck questioning your reality.I share the story of how I realized I was in an emotionally abusive relationship, how confusing and stuck I felt inside the trauma bond, and the turning points that helped me start to break free. I also talk about why simply recognizing abuse isn't enough — and how you need validation, boundaries, and clarity to start reclaiming your life.If you're Googling things like "Is this abuse?" or "Why does nothing I do seem to work?" — this episode is for you.I'll also talk about some of the tools that helped me, like Paul Colaianni's M.E.A.N. Workbook, and how my course is designed to give you something I wish I had: a clear foundation, validation, and steps you can actually take — even if you're still stuck inside the relationship.In this episode, you'll learn:How emotional abuse rewires your realityWhy trauma bonds keep you stuck (even when you can see the harm)How to set boundaries for yourself — even when they won't respect themHow to start validating your own experience (and stop feeling crazy)Resources Mentioned:Emotional Abuse Breakthrough CoursePaul Colaianni's M.E.A.N. Workbook (link to workbook if available)Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Vctoria Kirilloff, Certified Divorce Financial Analyst and founder of Divorce Analytics, brings her sharp expertise, and personal experience leaving an abusive relationship, to help listeners navigate the financial side of divorce with clarity and strategy.Together, we break down:How to start gathering financial information even if you feel completely in the darkWhy documenting financial coercion can become one of your strongest tools in family courtWhat a "global settlement proposal" is and why it can save you time, money, and emotional energyHow to avoid letting your emotions derail your legal or financial strategyThe most common myths survivors believe about money — and how to break free from themWhether you're still in the relationship or knee-deep in legal battles, this episode will give you both validation and direction. 

I'm joined by Dr. Nae, trauma bond expert, author of Run Like Hell, and former wife of Jordan Belfort—better known as the Wolf of Wall Street. Dr. Nae shares her story of surviving a deeply toxic and pathological relationship, what it took to finally leave, and how she transformed her experience into a mission to help others heal from narcissistic abuse and coercive control.We talk about:The difference between flawed partners and pathological onesWhat it actually means to be trauma bondedThe role of cognitive dissonance, coercive control, and the loss of selfThe danger of staying—and the danger of leavingHow to protect yourself when planning to leaveWhat healing really requires (hint: it's not just time)Whether you're in the fog or on the other side trying to make sense of what happened, this conversation offers validation, language, and a path forward.You can find Dr. Nae at drnae.com, and be sure to check out her book Run Like Hell, her trauma bond recovery community, and her daily insights on Instagram @therealdrnadine.✨ If you need support, I offer 1:1 coaching, one-off sessions, and resources at emotionalabusecoach.com. You'll find all relevant links in the show notes.Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

I explore how abusive partners can use therapy to reinforce blame, rewrite reality, and further control their partners. She breaks down red flags to watch for—like when therapy sessions become ammunition, or when your partner suddenly becomes an expert in your trauma but avoids accountability for their own.Jessica shares the emotional toll of navigating this dynamic and why you're not wrong—or crazy—for feeling like something is off even when your partner is “doing the work.” This episode is a validating reminder that true healing includes self-reflection, not deflection—and you deserve a relationship where you're not someone's emotional cushion or scapegoat.Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

This episode explores how gaslighting works, highlights red flags such as constant self-doubt and the need to over-apologize, and shares practical strategies for reclaiming your sense of reality. I also unpack the manipulative DARVO tactic—where abusers deny, attack, and reverse victim and offender roles—to help you recognize when your intuition is under siege. Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

You are allowed to be a whole person—not just a performance for someone else. If you've been in an emotionally abusive relationship, you may have been taught to compromise your needs, silence your instincts, and tie your worth to someone else's happiness. In this episode, I discuss how societal expectations and manipulative dynamics teach us to ignore ourselves—and how to begin reclaiming your autonomy, boundaries, and emotional safety. This is your permission slip to say no, to trust your instincts, and to begin choosing yourself.Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

In this episode, I discuss the isolating and draining reality of divorcing a narcissist. I share how constant manipulation, gaslighting, and relentless legal battles can leave you feeling lost and unheard. I dive into the challenges of a legal system that often falls short. If you're dealing with a high conflict divorce or post-separation abuse, join me for practical strategies and resources.Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

DARVO (Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender) is a pattern that keeps you stuck in cycles of self-doubt, confusion, and emotional turmoil. In this episode, I break down how it works, how to recognize it in real time, and—most importantly—how to start detaching from the manipulative narrative.If you've ever found yourself defending your actions instead of addressing the real issue, feeling like the "problem" in your relationship, or struggling to get clarity on what's happening, this episode will help you refocus on patterns, not excuses.Understanding these dynamics is a crucial first step in reclaiming your peace and emotional well-being.Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

This episode is a deep dive into the reality of navigating relationships with individuals who exhibit traits of Cluster B personality disorders—including narcissistic, borderline, antisocial, and histrionic personality disorders. If you've ever felt trapped in a cycle of confusion, self-doubt, or emotional exhaustion in your relationship, this conversation will help you understand why. I share personal experiences and insights from her coaching work to break down how these disorders manifest in toxic dynamics, the emotional manipulation tactics often used, and why so many survivors struggle to make sense of what's happening to them.Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Sex can be misused as a tool for emotional regulation and control rather than genuine connection. In this episode, I take you through a story describing what initially felt like overwhelming love gradually revealed itself as a pattern of guilt-tripping, boundary violations, and emotional manipulation. I detail specific moments where my autonomy was compromised: from the pressure to engage in intimacy even when physically or emotionally unready, to the way declarations of love were weaponized to silence my needs and enforce compliance. I also reflects on the confusing aftermath of these experiences and how to move through them.Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Intimacy can be manipulated as a tool for control and emotional regulation. She shares intimate stories of recognizing coercive patterns—from subtle guilt-tripping and boundary violations to the misuse of sex as a litmus test for emotional connection.Whether you've felt pressured in your relationships or questioned the true meaning of love and intimacy, this episode offers validation and guidance on setting firm boundaries, reclaiming your autonomy, and healing the relationship with yourself.Check out Nat's work: https://alwaysmending.com/maritalcoercionSupport the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Anne Wintemute, co-founder and CEO of Aimee Says, an AI-driven companion designed to support survivors of relationship abuse, joins me to share the inspiration behind Aimee and how it serves as an emotional support tool, offering validation, guidance, and safety planning for those navigating toxic relationships.We discuss how AI can help survivors recognize red flags, document their experiences, and access trauma-informed resources—especially in those lonely, late-night moments when support feels out of reach. We also explore how Aimee's real-time responses can help stop abuse before it escalates, making it an invaluable tool for anyone questioning their reality or seeking clarity.Visit Aimee Says to explore AI-driven supportEye-Opening Moments PodcastEye-Opening Moments are stories of adversity, encounters, and perspectives. They are...Listen on: Apple Podcasts SpotifySupport the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

This episode breaks down why conventional breakup rules don't apply when you're dealing with manipulation, control, and gaslighting, and offers guidance on how to reclaim your boundaries, your sanity, and your life. By focusing on patterns over promises, I provide tangible steps to help you break free from the emotional tug-of-war and start taking back control. Whether you've experienced emotional abuse firsthand or are just looking for clarity around unhealthy relationship dynamics, this episode equips you with the tools to heal and move forward. Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Can an emotionally abusive person change? Paul Colliani joins me to explore the patterns of manipulative behavior, why some people refuse to take accountability, and how anxious attachment and emotional immaturity play into abusive dynamics. We also discuss the false hope that keeps many survivors stuck, the importance of recognizing real change versus empty promises, and the hard truth that healing often means letting go.You can find Paul here: loveandabuse.comSupport the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

In this episode, I break down what trauma bonding really means and why it can feel so hard to leave a toxic relationship. Instead of being about sharing past trauma, trauma bonding happens because of a crazy cycle of ups and downs—brief moments of love and kindness that keep you holding on even when you're being hurt. In this episode, I discuss how these roller coaster relationships work and why promises to change often end up being tricks to keep you stuck. I also share simple tips on how to spot these harmful patterns, set clear boundaries, and take back control of your life. If you've ever felt trapped in a relationship that just isn't right, this episode offers straightforward advice and real steps to start healing.Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Traditional breakup rules fall short when you're dealing with a partner whose only goal is to control the narrative—and why the breakup never feels like an ending at all. In this episode, I will discuss:Unpacks the Cycle: Discover how manipulative behaviors like gaslighting, guilt-tripping, and isolation keep you stuck, even when you know you deserve better.Sets New Boundaries: Learn actionable steps to reclaim your power by enforcing non-negotiable boundaries and embracing a no-contact approach for your emotional safety.Reclaims Your Narrative: Understand why empty promises don't align with ongoing patterns of manipulation, and how you can validate your own experience to begin the healing process.Whether you're questioning your reality, struggling with mixed signals, or simply need reassurance that you're not alone, this episode offers the validation, insights, and strategies you need to move forward.Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

"Why am I stuck?" In this episode, I unpack the layers of trauma bonding, cognitive dissonance, gaslighting, and self-blame that keep survivors tethered to their abusers long after the relationship ends.I share insights from my own healing journey, including the emotional grip of intermittent reinforcement and the manipulation of vulnerability. If you've ever found yourself struggling to reconcile conflicting emotions or doubting your experiences, this episode is for you.Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

How can a fear of abandonment lead to pushing people away? In this episode, I explore the complexities of anxious attachment, traits of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), and how self-awareness can pave the way for healthier relationships.I delve into the inner conflict often experienced by individuals with BPD—a push-pull dynamic where fear of abandonment clashes with fear of engulfment. This tension frequently results in self-sabotaging behaviors that disrupt connection and trust in relationships.Drawing from my own journey of healing anxious attachment through exposure therapy, coaching, and resources like Attached, I reflect on a past relationship where my partner's hypersensitivity, constant need for reassurance, and deeply rooted fears created an exhausting cycle of chaos.You can follow me on Substack here: https://jessicaknightcoaching.substack.com/Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

This episode dives into the misunderstood and rarely discussed topic of sexual coercion in relationships. I discuss recognizing coercive patterns and how emotional manipulation can slowly erode personal boundaries, leaving you feeling trapped, guilty, and ashamed.I also read heartbreaking comments from women who shared their own stories of being pressured, guilted, and manipulated into sex—especially during moments of vulnerability, illness, and exhaustion.If you've ever felt like your "no" was ignored, negotiated, or turned into a reason for blame, this episode will help you put words to that experience and remind you: Your boundaries are valid. Your body is yours. And you're not crazy.You can follow me on Substack here: https://jessicaknightcoaching.substack.com/Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Divorce coaching can transform your experience when navigating high-conflict separations, especially with a narcissistic or difficult ex. Learn why proactive coaching is more effective than crisis-mode reactions, how to build resilience during calm periods, and the practical strategies that can save you emotional and financial strain.In this episode, I share real-life success stories, highlights the role of divorce coaching alongside legal and therapeutic support, and discusses how it prioritizes the well-being of your children while minimizing conflict. Whether you're facing custody battles or seeking to co-parent effectively, this episode offers insights and actionable advice to help you thrive through the process.Eye-Opening Moments PodcastEye-Opening Moments are stories of adversity, encounters, and perspectives. They are...Listen on: Apple Podcasts SpotifySupport the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

New Year's resolutions often come with societal pressure to transform, but if you're recovering from emotional abuse, they can feel overwhelming and triggering. In this episode, I share why it's okay to step away from the noise and focus on what you truly need to move forward.In this episode:Why “New Year, New You” narratives can feel impossible when healing from abuse.The power of personal promises to yourself instead of rigid resolutions.Practical strategies for creating calm and nurturing self-trust amidst chaos.If the New Year feels like more pressure than possibility, you're not alone. This episode offers insights to help you reclaim your sense of self and create space for meaningful healing—on your own terms.For additional resources and support, visit EmotionalAbuseCoach.com.Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Holidays can be a minefield of emotions, especially when past traumas resurface. In this episode, I delve into the complexities of holiday triggers and how they amplify everything.  We explore understanding why holidays can trigger past trauma and ways to manage it, strategies for grounding yourself in the present moment amidst emotional upheaval, the importance of setting new traditions that prioritize your well-being.Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Navigating co-parenting challenges with a high-conflict ex can feel overwhelming—especially during the holiday season. In this episode, I share practical strategies to manage last-minute schedule changes, manipulative behavior, and the emotional toll these dynamics can take. Learn how to stick to your court order, document effectively, and create new traditions that bring joy to you and your kids, even in the midst of chaos. Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Navigating the holidays without your kids? You're not alone, and this episode is here to support you. On this episode, I dive into the raw realities of spending holidays apart from your children due to divorce or custody arrangements. Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

This episode dives into emotional coercion—the subtle, insidious tactics designed to control your decisions and behavior without overt aggression. From gaslighting that leaves you questioning your reality to guilt-tripping that makes you feel responsible for your partner's happiness, I uncover the patterns that keep you stuck in toxic cycles.I also cover practical strategies to recognize red flags, break free from manipulative behaviors, and start reclaiming your confidence and autonomy.If you've ever felt like you're “too sensitive” or find yourself apologizing just to keep the peace, this episode is for you. **Update** the December 1 masterclass has been postponed until January. To sign up for updates, subscribe to my newsletter: https://jessicaknightcoaching.activehosted.com/f/5So MetaInspiring stories of resilience: overcoming struggles, finding purpose, transforming livesListen on: Apple Podcasts SpotifySupport the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Coercive control is an invisible form of abuse that traps victims in a web of psychological manipulation and domination. In this episode, Dr. Christine—a survivor, protective parent, and advocate—unpacks the strategies abusers use to exert power without physical violence. From understanding the parallels between coercion and tactics used in totalitarian regimes to exploring the cultural and societal roots of abuse, this episode provides a comprehensive look at how coercive control impacts individuals.Dr. Christine shares her journey and offers practical tools for identifying coercive control, presenting evidence effectively in family courts, and navigating the legal system.You can learn more about Dr. C here:https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Today, we are diving into Financial Coercion with Victoria Kirilloff. Victoria helps to simplify complex financial issues that often arise during divorces involving manipulation and control.In this episode we discover how to identify signs of financial coercion, learn strategies to regain control over your finances post-divorce and understand the importance of knowing your numbers for empowerment and independence.Victoria is a Holistic Wealth Consultant who specializes in helping families make data driven financial decisions during divorce. I highly recommend reaching out to her if numbers aren't your forte. You can connect with her here: https://victoriakirilloff.com/Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

We're diving into those powerful "last straw" moments—the times when you feel that unmistakable surge of clarity that enough is truly enough. These moments don't always come all at once; it might take several before you feel ready to fully break free. But often, they spark a deep, rising anger that fuels the decision to stand up against manipulation and control once and for all.Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Is it love or is it control? Often disguised as love, these relationships operate under a foundation of control. In this episode, I explore the myths surrounding relationship breakdowns, moving beyond the usual assumptions of “incompatibility” or “lost affection” to reveal a darker truth: for many narcissistic abusers, love was never the endgame—control was. By understanding this crucial distinction, listeners will be guided to reassess their past experiences, recognize the signs of toxic dynamics, and move forward with clarity, resilience, and the freedom to rebuild their lives on their terms.Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse CoachInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substak} Blog About Recovering from Abuse{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

This episode dives into the fascinating (and frustrating) phenomenon of euphoric recall, where our brains play favorites with our memories, shining a spotlight on those rare “happy” moments while tucking away the pain and manipulation that came with them. We'll explore why this happens—from the brain chemistry behind it to the psychological factors that make euphoric recall so powerful in keeping us emotionally attached.Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse CoachInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substak} Blog About Recovering from Abuse{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Sexual coercion is often misunderstood or overlooked in conversations about consent. It involves pressuring or manipulating someone into sexual activity through verbal, emotional, or physical means. These actions are frequently hidden behind societal norms that wrongly portray sex as an obligation in relationships.In this episode, Nat joins me to break down the harmful misconceptions about sex and consent. We explore how coercion shows up in relationships—whether it's through anxiety around intimacy, unwanted touching, guilt-tripping (like misusing love languages), or interpreting a partner's refusal as rejection. Together, we identify the signs of coercive dynamics and discuss the steps toward recognizing and reclaiming your own boundaries.You can learn more about him here: https://alwaysmending.com/maritalcoercionSupport the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse CoachInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substak} Blog About Recovering from Abuse{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Have you wondered how and why they think the way they do? In this episode, I discuss why abusive individuals struggle with self-reflection and accountability. Discover how their fear of being perceived as 'the monster' fuels defensiveness and control tactics.Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse CoachInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substak} Blog About Recovering from Abuse{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Relationships with an abusive person often end not because of lost love, but due to a loss of control by one partner. This episode dives deep into the subtle tactics that can manipulate and dominate a relationship without you even realizing it.Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse CoachInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substak} Blog About Recovering from Abuse{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

One of the most distressing aspects of dealing with an emotionally abusive individual is their persistent disregard for boundaries. Most of us are left feeling powerless. In this podcast, we dive into having boundaries for yourself instead of focusing on changing the abuser's behavior—which often leads to disappointment.Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse CoachInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substak} Blog About Recovering from Abuse{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Are you finding yourself focusing on your abuser's occasional positive traits rather than acknowledging consistent abusive behavior? It's not uncommon to see only the best versions of them despite their behavior. This episode will help you accurately see an abusive individual (with a lot of grace for yourself).Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse CoachInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substak} Blog About Recovering from Abuse{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Ever feel like you've been on a rollercoaster without a seatbelt? Welcome to a relationship with someone w/BPD. In this episode, I want to break down BPD. We will look at understanding the idealization-devaluation cycle typical in BPD relationships, recognizing signs of emotional dysregulation and its effects on partners and practical, actionable advice for setting boundaries and improving communication.Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse CoachInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substak} Blog About Recovering from Abuse{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Do you feel confused all of the time? Are you wondering if they are a safe person? This confusion frequently arises from past trauma resurfacing or the dynamics of the present relationship. This episode provides an honest self-reflection and thorough questioning to help you discern if you are in a healthy, safe relationship.Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse CoachInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substak} Blog About Recovering from Abuse{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Are you feeling crazy after a breakup? The intense emotional upheaval that follows breaking up with a manipulative partner is insane. Many people find themselves questioning their sanity and grapple with self-blame and confusion—emotions often amplified by their ex-partners' toxic behaviors.This episode explores the cycle of manipulation. I explore a few key concepts:Shifting Blame: Toxic partners frequently evade accountability by shifting blame onto their victims.Emotional Chaos: They maintain control through creating an environment filled with emotional chaos.Unclear Boundaries: These partners often blur relationship boundaries, making it difficult for victims to understand what constitutes acceptable behavior.Support the showWebsite: Emotional Abuse CoachInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substak} Blog About Recovering from Abuse{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Wondering how to work with me? This episode breaks it down.Support the Show.Website: Emotional Abuse CoachInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substak} Blog About Recovering from Abuse{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Do toxic relationships make you mirror abusive behaviors?In this episode, I explore a common question: am I just like them? I explore whether living with a narcissist or emotionally abusive partner can make us react in ways that feel out of character, just to survive.Key Takeaways:- Understanding reactive abuse and why it happens.- Strategies for setting boundaries with yourself and others.- The importance of recognizing your triggers and maintaining your individuality.Tune in to learn how to navigate these challenging situations without losing yourself.Support the Show.Website: Emotional Abuse CoachInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substak} Blog About Recovering from Abuse{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Chantal Contorines, a high conflict co-parenting coach and mentor, joins me to  delve into the complexities of "co-parenting" with a Narcissist. We discuss strategies for being the best advocate for your child.In this episode, we address: The difficulty in truly co-parenting with a narcissist due to their inability to prioritize children over their ego.How parallel parenting often becomes the necessary approach when dealing with a manipulative ex-partner.The fact that parenting doesn't end at 18; it's about aiding children to become competent adults who are emotionally validated.Chantel's instagram is filled with validating and informative content: https://www.instagram.com/chantal.contorines.coaching/Learn more about her work on her website: https://www.thedivorcehub.ca/Support the Show.Website: Emotional Abuse CoachInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substak} Blog About Recovering from Abuse{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

This is an emotional and Narcissistic abuse Q and A episode. In this episode, I respond to questions sent through the FanMail option on my podcast host. I listeners' questions are answered regarding patterns of abusive behavior and seeking support outside family who may not understand the situation.Support the Show.Website: Emotional Abuse CoachInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Substak} Blog About Recovering from Abuse{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Today, Paul interviews me! Paul Colaianni brings his unique perspective as both a former emotionally abusive person turned healer. He shares that abusers often employ grooming tactics like mirroring their victim's interests to gain trust before turning the tables to exert control. I recount my personal battle with emotional abuse. I describe how she lost touch with her intuition and began conflating my needs with those imposed by my partner.Key takeaways from this conversation include:

Send us a Text Message.On this episode, I dive into healing from narcissistic and emotional abuse. This episode covers a few various perspectives and a toolkit for recognizing manipulative behaviors, setting personal boundaries, and nurturing self-love.Key takeaways from this episode:- Strategies to begin the healing process after abusive relationships- Understanding triggers and how to navigate them positively- Tips on identifying red flags in new relationships post-healingSupport the Show.Website: Emotional Abuse CoachInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Send us a Text Message.Does it feel like you need to heal from multiple versions of one person? It can feel almost impossible to find acceptance and solace as you heal from a person that did not even truly exist. In this episode, I talk about healing from the love bomber, devaluer, and the unrecognizable stranger (which we sometimes see all in one day).  I will cover the intoxicating highs of the 'love bombing' phase and its heartbreaking revelation as a facade, discuss how devaluation erodes self-esteem and learn strategies to reclaim your worth, and recognize the cold indifference during discard.Support the Show.Website: Emotional Abuse CoachInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Send us a Text Message.This episode delves into the emotions that surface when you can't seem to "get over" an abusive partner. It is so hard to move on from an abusive partner you have an attachment to. In this episode, I will discuss why understanding why it's challenging to move on from an abusive relationship, the societal pressures that make us feel like we should heal on a timeline and strategies for self-care and patience during the healing journey.Support the Show.Website: Emotional Abuse CoachInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

Send us a Text Message.A trauma bond is not because you have shared trauma.  On this episode, I delve into the often misunderstood concept of trauma bonds. Trauma bonds are not formed by shared traumatic experiences but rather through betrayal trauma within the cycle of abuse. This podcast aims to clarify what constitutes a trauma bond and offers insights on how you can begin the healing process.Support the Show.Website: Emotional Abuse CoachInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner