Another Way

What does Existential Kink actually look like in practice? In this special follow-up episode with Dr Carolyn Elliot, author of Existential Kink, I step into the client seat and allow Carolyn to coach me through a powerful session (note: I suggest you listen to the previous episode if you don't know what EK is). We dive into the challenges I'm facing in leadership, life and business, and she guides me through a pretty damn expansive EK practice (that isn't actually even in the book). I'll be honest—sharing this episode makes me nervous. It's one of the most vulnerable conversations I've ever had on the podcast. But I believe there's value in being open about the messy, human side of growth, and I hope my experience will resonate with you and offer some insights for your own journey. I also hope you get to see and feel the power of EK in action too. IG - Carolyn Elliot - www.instagram.com/carolynlovewell_ IG - Matt Defina - www.instagram.com/mattdefina_

I am so excited to share this episode with you - Existential Kink is a practice that has changed my life and changed the lives of so many people and clients around me and this episode I'm talking to the creator and author of the practice. Dr. Carolyn Elliott, now known as Carolyn Lovewell, is a writer, educator, and expert in shadow integration, with a PhD in Critical and Cultural Studies from the University of Pittsburgh. She is best known for her book Existential Kink: Unmask Your Shadow and Embrace Your Power, which explores how embracing repressed parts of ourselves can unlock personal transformation. The book blends Jungian shadow work with a unique approach to finding pleasure in difficult or undesirable experiences. In addition to her writing, Carolyn runs online programs like the "Sleep Over Mystery School," teaching occult philosophy and practical magic. She also founded the online community Electric Yes, where she offers coaching and workshops focused on her "Existential Kink" practices. Carolyn has traveled extensively, lived as a digital nomad, and now resides in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, with her family​. On the episode, we talk about: What 'Existential Kink' is How Carolyn discovered the 'EK' practice Why we actually love and create our own suffering (and how to change this) How to use EK to create the life you truly want (and why you don't yet have it) How Carolyn uses EK in her everyday life and relationship Carolyn's Links Instagram The Immortal College Buy the book: Existential Kink Matt's Links Another Way Instagram Matt Defina Instagram

This week's guest is a powerhouse! Alfie is an entrepeneur, fitness coach, model, actor and former corporate professional who left the rat race to pursure something more. Alfie shot to social media fame earlier this year (2024), after he created a Instagram account called @alfiegetshard, to share the journey of him completing the 75-hard challenge (go look this up if you don't know it!). In just a few months, Alfie's account grew to over 100k followers (now 247k), and he then used this momentum to launch a fitness, health and coaching business off the back of it. Originally from New Zealand, but relocated to Bondi Beach, Alfie is the epitomy of what's possible when you back yourself and create your own way. He's now living the life of his dreams with a bunch of other Kiwi mates who have all created the same lifestyle for themselves. He's team up with best mate Jake Blundell (aka @elastaboy - 661k IG followers) and they've now got their own IG accounts and businesses together, @purebodyeat and @trainpurebody (links below). I met up with Alfie at Waves Podcast Studio in Bondi while I was up for a trip earlier this year and the pleasure of going for a run with him and his run club while I was up. As you'll here in the episode, I first met Alfie because I complete one of his diet and fitness challenges and it had a real impact on me - I loved his philosophy and how much he simplifies things down. Naturally, I was keen to meet with him and start to uncover some his secrets. As you'll hear in the episode, Alfie's attitude to life, work and training are exceptionally positive and inspirational. In this episode, Alfie and I talk about: How he got into this world of health and fitness What it takes to actually show up day in, day out How to build a brand and business that's aligned with your life How to squeeze the most out of life, in all areas Alfie's got a heap of really accessible programs online, go and check him out at the links below. Alfie's Links IG - @alfiegetshard IG - @purebodyeats IG - @trainpurebody IG - @elastaboy Another Way Our podcast and business exists to help purpose-driven professionals create a meaningful life and career, without burning out. If you know of any guests that you think should appear, or have topics you'd like us to cover, please let me know via my details below. Contact Details As always, I'd love to hear your feedback! You can find me at the links below: IG - @anotherway.au IG - @mattdefina_ Email: matt@anotherway.au Working together Want to chat about collaborating or working together? Book a discovery call with me here Enjoy!

Alison Rice is a 10x award-winning leader, conscious career and business mentor, regenerative brand strategist and podcast host. It all started in 2018 with the launch of the now-acclaimed Offline, The Podcast. An antidote to hustle and grind culture, it remains dedicated to exploring more conscious and sustainable definitions of success. To date, it's been downloaded over 1.5 million times. Her ever-evolving body of work exists to serve anyone seeking a more spacious, sustainable and purpose-driven version of success. Which includes… Spiritually informed and highly strategic career mentorship and business programs.  Regenerative brand, community and content strategies that start with deep listening and emerge to meet the need of the time. Inclusive and aware community spaces that offer people a safe place to land, recover and redefine the role their work plays in the overall storyline of their lives. Prior to Offline, Alison held writing, editing, programming and publishing roles at The Walkley Foundation For Excellence in Journalism, ACP Magazines and Allure Media. In 2015 she led the award-winning localisation and launch of Who What Wear, Byrdie and MyDomaine into the Australian market and from 2013-2018, led POPSUGAR to become one of the country's most-read women's lifestyle websites. Key Projects Explore Alison's conscious career and business mentorship space at getoffline.co/off. Enrolments for the only four-month season she's running in 2024 are now open and will close at midnight on Sunday, April 28. Contact - Alison If you'd like to get in touch with Alison, the email address to write to support@getoffline.co. You can find her on Instagram @alisonlarsenrice. 

Meet Sammy, a dynamic individual who has worn many hats and experienced a multitude of life's adventures in a remarkably short span of time. Stepping off the conventional path at an early age, Sammy ventured into the realm of electrical work, instilling in him a profound appreciation for the value of hard work.  However, fate had a different calling, and at the ripe old age of 20, he bid farewell to the electrical trade to immerse himself in the vibrant world of music. This career change ignited his creative spark, inspiring him to craft and produce events that resonated with his own unique vision.  Over the past decade, Sammy has poured his heart and soul into curating extraordinary music festivals, food extravaganzas, and captivating community shows. His biggest triumph to date? An awe-inspiring long weekend gathering that united a staggering 35,000 people in Melbourne. Yet, amidst the glitz and glamour of the event scene, Sammy confronted his own battles with mental health, a struggle that had plagued him since his formative years. It was during his lowest point, when hope seemed to elude him, that he realized a transformation was essential.  Introduced to mindfulness by his family doctor, Sammy began to venture down a new path.  The transformative tools of meditation and mindfulness became the bedrock for nurturing and sustaining his mental well-being, elevating his overall quality of life to new heights. Driven by an unwavering passion, Sammy's mission is clear: to share the profound benefits of meditation and mindfulness with the world. Through his own remarkable journey, he aspires to guide and inspire others on their path to finding balance, cultivating inner peace, and unlocking their true potential. Sammy's story is a testament to the transformative power of meditation and mindfulness, and he stands ready to empower individuals from all walks of life to embrace a higher quality of existence Connect with Sammy One Minute Meditator Sammy Swayn Connect with Matt Matt Defina Another Way Mt Kilimanjaro Retreat Support Services Lifeline - 13 11 14 Beyond Blue - https://www.beyondblue.org.au/

How do you actually say YES to the adventure of life? What do you do when life keeps throwing your curveballs, hurdles and stop, wrong way signs? What do you do when life keeps whispering in your ear and nudging you to go another way? Well, my guest this week knows a thing or two about the above! On this episode, we spoke about: How Dre got into marketing and made some bold moves in her career at an early age The health challenges Dre navigated as a result of not choosing her true path The magic that has transpired in Dre's life since she did say YES Andrea Beck Andrea is a Cultural Futurist, Business Strategist, Creative Mentor, and CEO. She's the founder of All Rise, the next gen business development agency that innovates for impact (or “idea lab for transformational leaders and orgs”). There, she helps purpose-led brands launch, scale and establish themselves in their market, so they can become more influential and make a real difference in the world. From working for the Big 4 Management Consultancies, to pursuing art as a law school drop-out, to designing the strategies for major multinational brands like Barbie, Colgate and Chanel, to changing the law multiple times with marketing (e.g. removing taxes on tampons, introducing new Power of Attorney legislation to prevent abuse). Andrea has worked in every corner of the creative industry, as a researcher, analyst, business / brand / marketing strategist, content creator, partnerships manager, sales representative, brand ambassador, and business owner. With business of all sizes. She's fascinated by the power of stories to drive change, here to give future visionaries a voice, and raise the leaders our world needs. According to Andrea, we live in an extremely exciting time, where anyone has the opportunity to get their message and idea out there. But, having worked with many first-time creators, she also knows how daunting this can be! 30-day challenge To remove some of the barriers many aspiring business owners and thought leaders have, she's leading a 30-Day Challenge, where she'll be building a completely new brand and community from scratch, covering the exact steps it takes, from defining your vision, to finding your edge, to growing your audience, and beyond. She invites those who have always wanted a side hustle, or to take their brand to the next level, to join her. The creative revolution is here, and there has never been a better time to pursue your purpose or passion project! Dre's Links IG - @andreabeck www.allrise.com.au Matt's Links IG - @mattdefina_ www.anotherway.au

This is a very special conversation with a dear friend and brother of mine, Joshua Payne. Josh and I have done so much together in the last 6 years since meeting in his job interview for The Man Cave, and today we sat down to talk about his Bucks Party, or as he renamed it, his Bucks Portal. Bucks parties are realistically designed to celebrate a man stepping into becoming a Husband, but unfortunately we have lost the meaning and significance behind this event. And, Joshua wanted to do something about that and make it a truly memorable weekend that prepared him for his wedding. He recruited his nearest and dearest, including myself, to create a weekend for him that would do this. This is a juicy conversation about:  Rites of Passage and why they should be intentionally re-integrated back into society What it means to Josh to become a Husband and choose to get married Why he wanted his Bucks Party to instead be a 3-day, intentional Rite of Passage How we designed the weekend, including sharing a few key moments! __________ Bio As a seasoned professional with over 6 years of experience in the coaching and mentorship domain, Joshua has worked with thousands of individuals nationwide. Serving as a senior facilitator at The Man Cave, a renowned preventive mental health and emotional intelligence charity, Joshua has personally guided over 5000 young men towards embodying healthy masculinity, while also providing world-class facilitation training and emotional support to fellow facilitators/role models within the organisation.  Beyond his extensive role at The Man Cave, Joshua has continued to expand his impact by designing and delivering leadership and character development programs for organisations such as Movember, Monash University, The Olympic Committee, and The Rites of Passage Institute, spanning various age groups. Now Joshua is stepping forward and birthing an offering of his own.  “Your Window” is a brand new coaching and mentorship program that is the cultivation of all the tools and resources Joshua has been deeply initiated into across 6 years of facilitating and participating in various trainings worldwide. The concept behind 'Your Window', which offers group and 1:1 support to both men and women, revolves around the idea that individuals experience life through their unique lens shaped by their emotions, their belief systems, their wounding, and their core memories. These core memories we have experienced and the pain we have endured across the timeline of our lives often fogs up our window, leading us to see the world, ourselves, and others through a distorted lens. Through compassionate witnessing and gentle guidance, Joshua will support and empower you in cleaning your window, creating a far clearer connection to your fullest expression, deepest desires, and your own sovereign power.  ____ Joshua Payne IG - https://www.instagram.com/joshen.around/  Matt Defina IG - https://www.instagram.com/mattdefina_/  LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/matthewdefina/  Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/matt.defina/  Another Way IG - https://www.instagram.com/anotherway.au/  Website - www.anotherway.au  Join Book Club https://www.anotherway.au/book-club  Come to Basecamp A new, monthly community gathering for the holistic health community of Melbourne https://www.anotherway.au/basecamp The Kilimanjaro Experience - 2024  https://mountainsandmarathons.world/thekilimanjaroexperience-matt/ 

Julia Vogl is an Australian Journalist, Video Communication Coach, now a good friend AND a personal coach of mine. Julia has helped me grow and navigate A LOT in the last 12 months and I can't wait for you to hear this conversation. Her credentials include working for Australian Primetime TV shows like The Project on Channel Ten, Channel Nine, Hoyts and Foxtel, as well as newspapers and digital platforms like Cut.com spanning the last decade in Australia, the UK, and Indonesia. She is renowned for her razor-sharp wit, her love for bright popping colours, and a true dedication to bringing out the 'REAL' in all those she meets.  Her penchant for provocative video creation extends across entertainment, sport, music and celebrity having interviewed the likes of Cher, Harrison Ford, Kate Winslet, Matthew McConaughey, Justin Timberlake, Baz Lurhmann and many more. Julia's unique personality and willingness to turn her flaws into her flair have been her edge in standing out from the saturated market that is social media. Julia is currently based in Melbourne Australia, running online programs for On Camera Confidence and also in person public speaking workshops.  On this episode, we talk about:  How to build an iconic brand and business How to show up with confidence on Camera Julia's personal journey with mental health and an eating disorder Her favourite Hollywood A-Lister that she interviewed (it's epic)  How to do all the above, sustainably AND enjoy it along the way  Julia Vogl IG - https://www.instagram.com/juliavogl_/  Talk Is Cheap Academy Website - https://www.talkischeapacademy.com/  Matt Defina IG - https://www.instagram.com/mattdefina_/  LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/matthewdefina/  Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/matt.defina/  Another Way IG - https://www.instagram.com/anotherway.au/  Website - www.anotherway.au  Join Book Club https://www.anotherway.au/book-club  The Kilimanjaro Experience - 2024  https://mountainsandmarathons.world/thekilimanjaroexperience-matt/ 

Shelley Oak is a mother, a somatic ceremonialist, a facilitator of sacred spaces such as women's circles, retreats, and workshops that support people to connect to their bodies, truths, gifts and to live in their fullest expression and purpose.  She is a coach, a witch of many sorts, the owner of a holistic ritual product brand called Dark Mother, she is a yoni steaming specialist, and a badass birth doula. With fiery passion in emotional and spiritual wellness, ancient women's work, nervous system regulation, somatics and cultivating intimacy as a mode of healing.  Shelley's mission is to build a heart-lead, deeply connected community of raw and regulated souls. Shelley's flavour is all about bringing play, presence, and pleasure to all of her work and believes that is the key to integration and long lasting transformation.  Shelley supports her growing community to expand their range of embodied expression while also having a trauma informed, ritualistic and mega fun approach to doing the work.  On this podcast we talk about:  Shelley's journey to becoming a mother What the embodiment journey involves for a woman How men can better support the women in their life The somatic transformation that's required to live your truth Shelley Oak IG - https://www.instagram.com/shelley.oak/  Shelley Oak - https://www.shelleyoak.com.au/  Dark Mother - https://darkmother.com.au/  Matt Defina IG - https://www.instagram.com/mattdefina_/  LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/matthewdefina/  Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/matt.defina/  Another Way IG - https://www.instagram.com/anotherway.au/  Website - www.anotherway.au  Join Book Club!  https://www.anotherway.au/book-club  The Kilimanjaro Experience - 2024  https://mountainsandmarathons.world/thekilimanjaroexperience-matt/ 

Jordyn's professional journey began in the corporate world, where she spent a decade climbing the corporate ladder as a senior leader coaching high-performing teams and leaders. In 2019, she confronted a profound truth – her time in Corporate America had an expiration date. A desire for a career that seamlessly blended her skills and passions took root. Jordyn is now fulfilling that desire as a Leadership Coach for Mountains and Marathons, where she leads transformational leadership development programs and adventurous retreats that guide leaders to live in alignment with deeper fulfillment and inner peace.  Jordyn has a BA in Philosophy and is a certified Mindset Coach trained in trauma-informed somatic techniques and is now also a certified Yoga Teacher and Vocal Sound Healing Therapist. As a champion for seeing the potential and possibility in others, Jordyn supports her clients to live from their deepest truth and create their lives to be an expression of that.   Beyond her passion for coaching, Jordyn is a full-time, globe-trotting adventure and nature enthusiast. She has travelled to 41 countries, summited Mount Kilimanjaro three times, trekked through the Himalayas to Everest Base Camp, backpacked the Grand Canyon and the W-Trek in Patagonia, scaled multiple 14,000+ ft peaks worldwide, completed the Mont Blanc Marathon in France, and is always seeking ways to expand her comfort zone in new and meaningful ways.  She is excited to invite you to join the next leadership development experience, and the most profound way to visit the Roof of Africa: THE KILIMANJARO EXPERIENCE 2024.  This episode: On this episode we cover: How Jordyn achieved early success in Sales How she got to the point of choosing to leave Corporate How she created the life she now leads, travelling the world as a leadership coach and entrepeneur Jordyn Davis IG - https://www.instagram.com/jordynndavis/  LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/jordynndavis/ Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/jordynnicoledavis  Matt Defina IG - https://www.instagram.com/mattdefina_/  LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/matthewdefina/  Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/matt.defina/  Another Way IG - https://www.instagram.com/anotherway.au/  Website - www.anotherway.au  The Kilimanjaro Experience - 2024  https://mountainsandmarathons.world/thekilimanjaroexperience-matt/

Happy New Year! For this first episode of the year, I'm jumping behind the microphone myself again - couldn't help it. So, of course, I chose to bite off a chunky topic - how do you truly choose yourself? It's a big topic, but a worthy one to tackle in my opinion and one that I've spent the last 6-24 months in particular, deeply understanding.  I really hope that 2024 is going to be your best year yet (and genuinely believe that the cosmic flow of things has shifted - I think we're in for a good one). So, enjoy this first episode of the year, and next week we will back to regular programming with interviews with inspiring leaders, entrepreneurs and change-makers that have found another way.  Overview In this episode, I cover:  Why it's so challenging to choose yourself  What it even means to choose yourself  Share a poem I wrote last year on the topic (called Is it time yet?)  Share 7 steps to truly choosing yourself  Poem: Is it time yet?  You can access a printable version here 7 steps to truly choosing yourself What's the current way?  What's the impact?  Cost of Inaction: if you keep going this way, what's your life going to look like in 1, 2, 5, 10 years time?  What's another way?  What are the benefits?  Payoff of action: if you going this way, what are the potential gains?  What now?  Links Website: www.anotherway.au Join our Book Club: https://www.anotherway.au/book-club  Join our Monthly Moon Circle: https://www.anotherway.au/monthly-moon-circle  Book a discovery call with me: https://anotherway.as.me/free-coaching-call

For the final episode of 2023, I've decided to record my first solo episode, specifically focused on how to powerfully close out 2023. So often, we can just move on to what's next, but it's so important that we actually process what we've experienced. Both on a micro and a macro level. So, in this episode, I'll cover the following: Why it's important to close out the year How to embrace change and evolution in life What happened in my year and how I navigated it A series of reflection questions for you to use in closing out your year Reflection Questions What actually happened this year? What events did you actually move through? What were your highlights? Lowlights? Get out a big page, and draw out the timeline of your year  What were the inflexion points in your year? What events, big or small, really became the crux points in your year?  What self-realisations did you have across the year? What did you learn about yourself and the world?  What do you want to honour and acknowledge yourself for this year? What strength of character or spirit did you bring or create into your life and the lives of those around you, that only you could do? If this year was a chapter in the book of you, what would you call it? What's the title of it?  Now, write a letter to yourself at the start of 2023. If you could go back in time, and speak to yourself at the beginning of the year, what would you say? Allow this letter to be one of gratitude, acceptance and encouragement. How Surely Gravities Law - Rilke  How surely gravity's law, strong as an ocean current, takes hold of the smallest thing and pulls it toward the heart of the world. Each thing each stone, blossom, child is held in place. Only we, in our arrogance, push out beyond what we each belong to for some empty freedom. If we surrendered to earth's intelligence we could rise up rooted, like trees. Instead we entangle ourselves in knots of our own making and struggle, lonely and confused. So like children, we begin again to learn from the things, because they are in God's heart; they have never left him. This is what the things can teach us: to fall, patiently to trust our heaviness. Even a bird has to do that before he can fly.”

On the 3rd episode of the podcast, I'm joined by another good friend and now my personal tattoo artist, Vondove. We were lucky enough to record this episode just a week after Von tattooed my chest in her studio, taking a total of 11 hours - it was a big day. Von is an artist, ceremonial tattooist, and soul-led biz & brand development coach. She is the creator of Vondove - her business dedicated to the transformation of humanity through art, marking rites of passage, and supporting the expansion of Soul-ful businesses around the world. On this episode we talk about:  How Von turned her art into a successful business What ceremonial tattooing even is  The valuable lessons Von has learned along the way If you're interested in working with Von, you can reach out to her via Instagram! Connect with Von Website - www.vondove.com IG - @vondove Connect with me Website - www.anotherway.au IG - @anotherway.au IG - @mattyd203

Overview On this 2nd episode I'm joined by one of my coaches, mates and just an all round incredible man, Ben Harris - aka - The Fear Guy! Ben has been on an incredible journey and transformed his life in the last 4 years to become a seriously warm, empathetic and effective coach when it comes to alchemising fear. Rooted in love and the superpower of belief in himself and others, Ben is a testament of what possibilities arise when you love fear and trust your inner knowing. His strong sense of self continues to lead him on an ever-present journey of life. Ben's path has pivoted many times, in many directions. These broad experiences have created a platform to understand and support clients in overcoming their deepest fears as they return home to themselves. This is a great episode if you're stuck in a rut or a pattern that you're trying to break free from. Together we cover: Why people are driven by fear in their lives How to step out of living from fear In a first, Ben also guides me through his process so you can see how it actually works Ben is always releasing new programs and also has a great evergreen program he runs, Fear Alchemy. You can find it all on his website below. Links Ben Harris IG - https://www.instagram.com/the.fear.guy/?hl=en Ben Harris Website - https://www.feeling-free.com/ Matt Defina IG - https://www.instagram.com/mattyd203/?hl=en Another Way IG - https://www.instagram.com/anotherway.au/ Another Way Website - https://www.anotherway.au/ Free Coaching Calls Interested in knowing what it's like to work with me? I'm now offering free coaching calls to those interested - you can book in via my IG above. Coaching Giveaway for 2024 I'm also offering a 1 month of free coaching to kickstart 2024 for 1 motivated individual (valued at $1500). You'll get 4 x 60min free coaching calls with me, daily support from me via Telegram and personalised worksheets and resources. To enter, simply DM me on IG with your highest vision for 2024 and I'll be picking a winner next week.

Overview On this first episode of the first season of the podcast, I'm joined by leadership coach, ultra-endurance athlete and good mate, Jamin Heppell.  Jamin is the co-founder and leadership coach of Mountains and Marathons and co-creator of the ALIGN Leadership program. Jamin has coached the founders of multi-million dollar start-ups, leaders in real-estate, leaders in network marketing companies, corporate executives directors, ex-military, and many more. Besides his passion and gift as a coach, Jamin has ran a marathon in 6 continents, summited Mount Kilimanjaro 8 times, completed 3 ultramarathons (one of which raising $10,000 for a Balinese charity during COVID) and is in the Guinness Book of World Records for being a participant in the world's highest obstacle course race on Mount Kilimanjaro in September 2021. We were lucky enough to record this episode while in Tanzania, having just climbed Mt Kilimanjaro together! This is such a broad and expansive conversation, where we cover:  How it took Jamin to burnout to finally change his life  How to make powerful choices in your life Why people are afraid of living aligned  How Jamin consciously uncoupled with his partner in Bali during COVID Come climb Mount Kilimanjaro with us in 2024 Want come climb Mt Kilimanjaro with Jamin and I in 2024? Jump on the link below and get in touch with me if you're interested. Save $500 USD if you book before 31st Dec, 2023. https://mountainsandmarathons.world/thekilimanjaroexperience-matt/ Mountains and Marathons ⁠https://mountainsandmarathons.world/⁠  Jamin's Instagram https://www.instagram.com/jaminheppell/  Another Way's Instagram https://www.instagram.com/anotherway.au/ Matt's Instagram https://www.instagram.com/mattyd203/ Please note While the acknowledgment of country references the Australian indigenous people, this episode was recorded in Tanzania, and by virtue of this, I also acknowledge the indigenous people of the beautiful country that is Tanzania.