Aristotle Asparagus

Comedian Dave/David Theune joins the show to discuss his hometown, high school graduations, the weird shorts he starred in for UCB that may be lost to time, and other stuff. --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/aristotle-asparagus/support

Comedian and podcast host Caitlin Durante joins Aristotle and his friend Kiki to discuss their career beginnings inside a McDonalds basement, rural Pennsylvania, Wikipedia, and other things. --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/aristotle-asparagus/support

We discuss the history of the way too big amount of political parties founded to promote Oswald Mosley style British fascism. --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/aristotle-asparagus/support

We discuss the origins and the activities of the paleoconservative Constitution Party. --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/aristotle-asparagus/support

A look into Long Island Congressman George Santos, and how his lies were known, but covered up. --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/aristotle-asparagus/support

Welcome to a new era of this podcast! Aristotle Asparagus is a thing of the past, now we enter "Multiple Blood Sucking Insects," a podcast about the crazy things that happen in the political atmosphere. We start this off with our host, me, Sam, and my friends Leo and Jack, as we talk about Strom Thurmond's 24 hour filibuster of the Civil Rights Act of 1957. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Big Mouth and Human Resources producer Abe Foreman-Greenwald comes on to discuss his work on Netflix's Big Mouth and it's spinoff, and a potential Shyamalan plot twist. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Abed Gheith, comedian, Podcaster, and inspiration for Abed from Community joins Aristotle to discuss the extent to which Abed Nadir was based on him, Chevy Chase, and other things. Then, George L. Rockwell (no relation) and Martin van Buren de Klerk (also no relation) join the show to discuss their new political party the American Not See Party, which follows the ideals of never opening one's eyes. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Exactly what the title says, with a Saudi themed twist --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Actor in many shows such as Drunk History and the Office Greg Tuculescu joins Aristotle to talk about his career, as well as his unique last name and Romanian heritage. Later, janitor for the Metaverse Dick Fickleberg joins Aristotle and Greg to talk about... being a janitor for the Metaverse. And nothing else. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Aristotle and his co-host Luke Ash discuss the fist bump between Biden and MBS, before getting a surprise visitor. Later, farmer John Mitch tells his story of surviving an alien abduction. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Comedian and voice actor Tony Rodríguez joins Aristotle to discuss Donald Trump, how he got his role on The Simpsons, and more. Later, 2 Russian men named Bel Roosky and Sergey Pajebrin show up to discuss how the leader of the Soviet Union, Vladimir Putin, will be at G20 this year with his friend, current president Donald Trump-- wait what? --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Aristotle is joined by guest host Emm Buffalo to talk to Derrick Shakespeare, formerly the owner of an underground library who now runs an above ground library in the Metaverse. Plus, Derrick Shakespeare's ancestor William shows up later on to reveal that Marvel may have stolen his ideas. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Comedian and star of Good Trouble Dhruv Uday Singh joins Aristotle to discuss his career, as well as other issues and how he is confused with a Bollywood actor also named Dhruv Singh. Later, fossil fuel executive William E. Bobb IX comes on with his intern Julie Rudiani to discuss his new line of fossil fuel flavored hard seltzers. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Actor, comedian, and musician from the band Don't Stop or We'll Die Michael Cassady joins Aristotle to discuss things like Fantasia 2000, the origin of his band's name, classical music, and other stuff. Later, Ohea Etxea, a folklorist from the Metaverse dimension comes on to discuss his study of the mythology Mark Zuckerberg created when he went back in time to steal the universe earlier. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Aristotle talks to Benjamin Franklin about his Easter plans and Jack B. Lagomorfo, a cannibalistic Easter bunny --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Groundlings legend and voice actor Karen Maruyama joins Aristotle to discuss the work she's done at the Groundlings and on various TV shows. Then, Uerunom, a humanoid walrus indigenous to the universe Mark Zuckerberg is using as the Metaverse who speaks Proto-Indo-European comes on to be way too defending of Zuckerberg --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

St Patrick returns to discuss his recent joining of the IRA in order to remove Margaret Thatcher from Hell and place her in a state of purgatory so Satan doesn't have to live with such an awful human --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Actor, comedian, and voice actor Gary Anthony Williams, known for voicing Uncle Ruckus on the Boondocks as well as other roles in things like Whose Line is it Anyway, Star Wars Clone Wars, Mad, Boston Legal, and many many others joins Aristotle to talk about his love for the Boondocks before it was made into a TV show, roles he didn't get, and more. Later, Jeff and Ted, 2 students at a high school taught exclusively in the Metaverse come on to discuss things like Putin trying to take over the school, the cafeteria food, George Washington Carver, and other things. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Abe Lincoln and Dwayne Johnson are in this broh --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Johnny Bupid the Rock and Roll Cupid, played by Matthew McConaughey himself, joins Aristotle and Benjamin Franklin to discuss his plans for Rock and Roll Valentine's Day --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Aristotle, L. Ron Travolta, and Set Kamehameha all return to the Metaverse and meet old character Astrid Zeneca, who has been trapped there since May of 2021. She discusses the zoo she lives in, and not much else, as there's not much in the metaverse --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Actor Jordan Black comes on the show to discuss his work on things like SNL, Community, and the New Wonder Years reboot. Later, Berg Steenen and Steen Bergen, 2 film directors who just woke up from a 5 year coma join Jordan and Aristotle to discuss a film they are directing about the Trump administration, albeit a completely inaccurate film that is probably a Ponzi scheme. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Actor, writer, and comedian Dave Ferguson, known for his work in the Birthday Boys as well as on Superstore and the Comedy Bang Bang TV show comes on to talk about his career as well as other things like the city of Ithaca New York, Curb Your Enthusiasm, and his family. Later, Metaverse captive Joe Fild calls in from a farm in the Metaverse to discuss how he was captured by Mark Zuckerberg and forced to live in the Metaverse, and later helps Aristotle and Dave enter the Metaverse. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

In a Christmas episode, we interview series regular Benjamin Franklin, as well as composer Pyotr Illyich Tchaikovsky, who has returned from the afterlife to discuss his new sequel to the Nutcracker, a ballet called The Nutcracker 2: Return of the Terminator, which he is selling as an NFT --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Series regulars Benjamin Franklin and Set Kamehameha return, where Set talks about his quest to capture an alien causing the Omicron variant and make him an Assweed mascot. Later, Cheryl Fuld, a lorax but not THE lorax, and KW from Where the Wild Things Are, 2 supposed representatives for PETET (People for the Ethical Treatment of Extra Terrestrials) come to protest this idea. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Wally Feresten, SNL cue card holder for 30 years and current cameo maker on Late Night Seth Meyers joins Aristotle to discuss his work as a cue card holder, how improvisation is treated on set, Will Forte masterpieces and the crime of Will still not being given a hosting gig yet, among other things. Later, Maurice Sendak characters Ira from Where the Wild Things Are and Mickey from In the Night Kitchen return to Aristotle's show to discuss covid vaccines, booster shots, and the literary omicron variant that infected Ira's fellow Wild thing Carol (who is a male Wild thing) --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

For a special Thanksgiving and 1 year anniversary episode of Aristotle Asparagus, we talk to original guest Benjamin Franklin, coming on to talk about the new documentary he's filming about the first Thanksgiving he's working on through time travel. Later, in replacement for Set Kamehameha who is on a business trip, Set's cousin, Assweed sales coordinator Ptolemy Builder comes on to discuss Assweed's new and improved Thanksgiving dinner. Thank you to everyone who has done my podcast in the past that has helped make it possible for the Aristotle Asparagus podcast to be around for longer than the time it takes the Earth to rotate around the sun, it means a lot. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Rejected Sesame Street Muppet Guglielmo comes on to discuss his recent vaccination against covid and Ted Cruz's reaction. Later, anti-Vax podcast host Harry Ovine joins Aristotle to talk about the borax baths he's been taking to be safe from the vaccine he had to take to keep his job. Plus a new segment! --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Regular Show and Close Enough writer Matt Price joins Aristotle to talk about the origins of Regular Show as well as how it could have been an adult cartoon and about how much of a simp Mordecai is. Later, Salem Witch Trials victim Giles Corey returns from the dead to discuss his trauma from being crushed by stones, his work for and against AdCorp, and he also learns that people no longer accuse others of witchcraft in a negative way. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

AdCorp workers Ira and Mickey, from the respective Maurice Sendak books Where the Wild Things Are and In the Night Kitchen join Aristotle to discuss their plans to launch a coup against Crazy Frog's leadership at AdCorp --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Kevin Costello, the screenwriter for one of Aristotle's favorite movies, Brigsby Bear, joins Aristotle to discuss the production of the movie, upcoming projects, and more. Later (sigh) Crazy Frog makes his grand return to discuss his new plan for taking over America once again, as well as his work on the new Chris Pratt Mario movie. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

After Aristotle talks to his lawyer L. Ron Travolta, a horse farmer and equinophile named Equo Chevalier shows up to discuss his Covid 19 Mystery Drug which definitely is not ivermectin --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Comedian Anthony Atamanuik, known for things like 30 Rock, What We Do in the Shadows, and his Trump impersonation joins Aristotle to discuss his career among other things. Later on, vigilante Sir Dickolas Christopher comes on to talk about his vigilante goal of recalling every governor while chasing after his enemy. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Actor and comedian Nick Rutherford (Good Neighbor, Saturday Night Live, Rick and Morty, Dreamcorp LLC) joins Aristotle to discuss his origins in the Good Neighbor sketch troupe, what it's like working at SNL, tells us a funny story about one of his Rick and Morty episodes. Later, rapper and yeast of thoughts and mind The Globglogabgalab comes on to discuss his new collab album with Kanye West, "The New Album." --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

TV plumber and brother of Errick and Derrick Merrick Shakespeare joins Aristotle and Marian Glink to discuss laying pipe and... and nothing else. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

TV actor Will McLaughlin (Superstore, Parks and Recreation, others) joins Aristotle to discuss his work at UCB, as well as on multiple shows, and how he is often typecast as police officers named Randy Killnose. Later, local janitor The President (short for Therius John President Jr.) comes on to talk about his role at a secret janitor's union. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Our old friend Mr. Spritecan returns to the show to reveal a dark secret about his origins and how we can help. In addition, Olympic swimmer Delta Variant (no relation) comes on to discuss his work swimming in Aristotle's bathtub as a shrunken down person, the designated area for Olympic swimming selected by Crazy Frog. Later, we may or may not escape back to an old location to evade AdCorp after something goes wrong. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Notice: I mentioned Rodney Alcala in this episode, the serial killer who was on the Dating Game. He had actually died about 2 hours before I recorded this episode, however I did not know. The mention of him was a total coincidence. . Old enemy L. Ron Travolta returns to Aristotle Asparagus to discuss his firing from AdCorp and his plans to join our side and be our lawyer against AdCorp. AdCorp intern Marian Glink and United States of AdCorp Supreme Court Chief Justice Errick Shakespeare are also here. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Charlie McCrackin, writer for Peacock's AP Bio and actor for character Coach Dick Novak, as well as frequent Magic Tavern guest joins Aristotle to discuss his career, the origins of AP Bio, and what's next. Later basketball player LeBron James comes on to discuss Space Jam, super speed powers, and his new position on the United States Supreme Court, thought he may not be what he seems. Accompanying Justice James is former British monarch William the Conqueror, serving as LeBron's vice justice, though he may not be what he seems either. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Errick Shakespeare, the brother of underground librarian Derrick Shakespeare and the newly elected Chief Justice of the United States Supreme Court under AdCorpian rule joins Aristotle and AdCorp intern Marian Glink to discuss what he plans to do when presiding over AdCorp v. Asparagus, Glink, Franklin and Spritecan, as well as the help he needs finding 8 replacement justices for AdCorp's new supreme court. However, things go awry when political pundit and supreme adbot Ben Shapiro shows up to threaten death if not chosen as a new justice. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

While Crazy Frog and the other regional managers of AdCorp (Gummibar, Hampton the Hamster, and Mr. Raisin Toast) are busy meeting with Joe Biden about the long planned purchase of the United States, making it a corporate dictatorship, Marian Glink, a reverse financed intern captured by AdCorp frantically serves as substitute CEO of AdCorp, where we find out that Mr. Spritecan was originally part of AdCorp and travel through time to escape Crazy Frog after we get caught escaping from the AdCorp building --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Special guest star Seth Morris (Big Mouth, Comedy Bang Bang) joins Aristotle to discuss his career and the origins of some of his famous CBB characters. Later, Google employee and impresario Tomasso Bergeroni shows up with Crazy Frog, now using a voice modulator that makes him sound like L. Ron Travolta, to discuss Tomasso's new musical based on his own creation, the YouTube channel Webdriver Torso. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Support group leader Dotte Lefebvre (la-feb-vur) of Anonymous Anonymous, a support group for Anonymous people, is joined by returning guest, the anonymous Jane Doe, and comes to discuss how she started it, until we fix Jane's problem much more easily, revealing her real identity, listen to find out! In additional, Aristotle switches brains with Set Kamehameha, and Benjamin Franklin debates Ben Shapiro! --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Writer for Duncanville and Young Sheldon Nick Mandernach joins Aristotle to discuss his start as a writer, the work environment for his show, and more. Later, supervillain Crazy Frog shows up accompanied by adbot and lifeguard Ben Rome, who discusses working at a lifeguard at a pool in the middle of nowhere and possibly almost letting a person with a confusing age drown. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Writer for shows like The Simpsons, Parks and Recreation, New Girl, AP Bio, and Silicon Valley Donick Cary joins Aristotle along with co-hosts L. Ron Travolta and Wink Giamatti to discuss his work on the various shows he did, as well as other stuff like cicadas, the Washington Football Team, and Mochi. Later, supervillain Crazy Frog returns to discuss AdCorp's new product in the line of Crazy Animals, the Crazy Cicada which steals your data, rhyme not intended. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Special guest star Adal Rifai of the podcast "Welcome to the Magic Tavern" joins Aristotle, Benjamin Franklin, and Derrick Shakespeare to discuss his origins in podcasting before falling into a portal to a video game --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Commercial star turned musician turned supervillain Crazy Frog invades Aristotle and Set Kamehameha's conversation about Set's growing success selling ass weed to trap the 2 in the AdCorp Building --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Rejected Looney Tunes character Capybara P. Johnson comes on to discuss how he got rejected from being a major character, what he's been doing in the 8.5 decades since his rejection, and the possibility of a cameo in the new Space Jam movie. Then, Looney Tunes creator Chuck Jones and Looney Tunes voice actor Mel Blanc arrive straight out of the underworld to discuss their plans for a new Underworld exclusive Looney Tunes Cinematic Universe and the film about Marvin the Martian, played by the living but functionally dead Prince Philip, fighting Perseverance, played by Andre the Giant, to start it all. They also discuss the plans for the next film, one about Gossamer. After Mel Blanc leaves, Marvin the Martian himself comes on to discuss his own opinions on the film and Prince Philip makes a quick cameo to not hear anyone. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Notice: It should be noted that at around the 25-30 minutes in period, a person who called himself "Bobby" (or Bobby Shmurda) came in and I have no idea who the hell it was and neither do the others. It is likely that one of my friends invited him and is good at covering it up, but there's a chance it could be a hacker. In a part not included in this episode, another strange person joined, with a different voice, and despite being called "Sara," it was a male voice. If anybody listening recognizes the voice, let me know immediately. Otherwise, enjoy the show. . Intergalagtic ice cream truck driver Paul Ron joins Aristotle and co-host Set Kamehameha, as well as L. Ron Travolta who joins in later, to discuss his business delivering ice cream across dimensions, as well as meeting otherworldly creatures like gopher versions of American presidents, benevolent versions of malevolent dictators, and different times Abraham Lincoln (who looks much better with a beard) could have died. Later, Paul Ron's voice changes right as Aristotle gets kidnapped and emerald miner and father of a guy named Elon Errol Musk joins us from his emerald mining dimension of which he is the only inhabitant to discuss his shady past, how he feels about his son hosting Saturday Night Live and his plans to infiltrate, and the multitude of lawyers he made out of emeralds. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

Futurama and The Big Bang Theory writer Eric Kaplan joins Aristotle for a half-length episode to discuss his experiences on Futurama and how Andy Richter voiced a lemur. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app