Think of the Children

Those darn TOTC boys are back at it again to ruin more of your beloved childhood memories! This week, the lads have some thoughts on national service, find a wizard, and give a much better comedy duo a podcasting idea... It's TOTC, baybeeeeee! Currently Brainstorming: Jay's Newest Addiction, Raspberry Boy, The Boozone, The Offering, National Service, Sandwhich Interuptions, Square Boy, Sleepy Queen Liz, Fart Joke, White Boy Jay, Circular Storytelling, Phineas and Ferb: The Podcast. Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy Website: www.totccast.com

The boys have escaped the Astral Dimension and only Dave is really worse for wear. Owen and Jay are still alive and this week they talk about the American Diet, Nerds on Twitter, Robots having the sex and how to raise the next generation of Philosophers. It's the Think of the Children you know and love, here like a beacon in these dark times Currently Brainstorming: Time Refraction, The Tum Compartment, Editing Magic, Eldritch Varmints, Astro Nut, Eating Machinery, Child Debt, Calling out Twitter Nerds, Blind Souls, Ornstien and Smoog, Robot Clit, & Medabots (2020 Reboot) Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy Website: www.totccast.com

Owen and Jay are back after a tumultuous 2020. They explain where they've been, what's coming next, apologise profuesly for their absence and ask if you'd like Cocaine or Pepsi. Short Answer: Patrons, check your emails over the next week, everyone else, new epsisode next week.

Oops! It's been 3 Months! Global Pandemics are bad for productivity, it turns out! Either way, the boys are back on the open road to do the nasty thing you love so much. This time around, we turn some bath toys into murderers, teach the children that everything they do is useless and develop some fun flash games to teach the kids about the existential threat of being alive! Join us, won't you, for another Think of the Children! Currently Brainstorming: Lizard Cum, Haunted Frog Man, Rubbasnubbers, Parental Trickery, Draconic Discouragement, Childhood Trauma, Leaning into the Curve, The Blockening Part XI: PhilosophyTube, Polka Dot Cow Man, Pigs Morgan, & Maggie and the Hate Construct. Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy Website: www.totccast.com

This week, the boys are joined by reptile lover and the host of Talking With Dinosaurs, Stefan Ayto! They kind of owe him one, you'll see why. They also recreate the epic of Gilgamesh, insult two of New Zealand's national heroes, and get Henry Cavill fans riled up as they put him in schoolgirl uniforms. We're here in the time of crisis, it's Think of the Children! Currently Brainstorming: Roadside Assistance, Reptile Matrimony, Deicide, Devilman: Badjelly, Cobra Venom, The Warlocker, The Three Cavills, TOTC Hygiene Advice, History Lessons, Character Assasination & What Now?! (Horny Version) More Stefan: @Ershatz Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy Website: www.totccast.com

Kids, I won't lie, this one goes off the rails a little bit towards the end. It's good shit, but we've both gone a little stir crazy, apparently. This week, the lads praise the efficiancy of Herod, publically dunk on Piers Morgan, and create some terrible puppet creations... Again. Strap in, friends, it's gonna get bumpy. Currently Brainstorming: Vancuffs, The Art of Vore, Rickle: The Pickling, Vinnie Jones Green Cross Code, My Mans Herod, Piers Morgan's Sundown, Owen's Dyslexia Strikes Back, The Singularity, Hunger Games: Gamers Edition, Nightmare Muppets, The Opposite of an Erection, Eureeka's Castle (2020 Reboot Dir. R. L. Gaster) Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy Website: www.totccast.com

The wheels are still a-rollin' here at the TOTC Mobile Headquarters. Owen and Jay have both taken different approaches to raising money, neither of which have been particularly profitable, so we're back to ruining childhoods. We gift a beloved character the powers of an Elder God, make the Digimon relentlessly horny, and utilize The Demon Drill for fun and profit. Buckle up, kids! It's a wild one. Currently Brainstorming: Growing Pains, New Career Paths, Watch Crimes, DP-Gimon, Cock Armour Class, The Demon Drill, Crime Disclaimers, Tit Wrestling, Waluigi Board, & WALUIGI (Elder God) Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy Website: www.totccast.com

We're back! But not quite as you know it. Some things have changed for Owen and Jay but they need to keep the wheels greased and beef jerky in their tummies, so they're gonna keep ruining childhoods for fun and profit. It's all here on Think of the Children! Currently Brainstorming: Scottish Avoidance, Vim2.0, Wimbleton, Forbidden Bowls, Neil vs Neale, Fuck Names, Do Cockroaches Fuck?, Dart Refractory Period, Ozymandias Jerky, Nerf: Ambush. Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy Website: www.totccast.com

Happy New Year, friends! After comitting a terrible podcast crime, Jay is on the run and Owen drank himself into a coma. So, as a cruel and unusual punishment, we have used the power of Jumanji to trap Ismay Hutton, Alfred Clark and Emily Kuklinski in our podcast! They will only be released when the 7 Jumanjis have been collected or they've ruined a childhood, whichever comes first. Join us for a spell in this first ever Hostile Takeover! Currently Brainstorming: Jumanji'd, Rotten CDRomatos, BYOG, Elizabethan LARP Winter Camp, Virginian Feminism, Incomprehensible Animal Names, Bellatrix Beev, Bastard Money, Candyland Glass Time, Dead Clock Clown, Major Bedhead, NoAssitol and The Big Comfy Couch (2020 Reboot) Crit Chat Crew: Ismay (@aTeacupGamer): twitch.tv/ateacupgamer Alfred (@pennyblue_): twitch.tv/pennyblue Emily (@ThePunnyEmily) Crit Chat (@Crit_Chat): https://crit-chat.pinecast.co/ Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy Website: www.totccast.com

Well friends, we've arrived at the big 5-0. It's a feature length presentation of our fetid, dirty crimes against your nostalgia, and we did it just for you... Enjoy the 50th  Episode of Think of the Children, and the last episode for the year. We love you, thank you for the support

It's Spooky Episode 2.0, baybee! We got more scares, more ghouls and more physical manifestations of your deepest darkest fears. Roll up, roll up, come see the spectral troupe, the wholesome sex-worker ghost, and the scariest thing of all... corporate takeovers. Listen to the new episode... if you dare... Currently Brainstorming: Owen's Very Cursed Day, Schrodinger's Podcast, Doki Doki Corpse Bride Club, Hostile Takeovers, The Blockening Part 10: Laika Studios, Cultural Differences, Hardcore Trunk or Treat, Shrewsbury Callout, Jay Says Trans Rights, The Blockening Part 11: Ben Shapiro, & Honey: *you feel uncomfortable* (2019 Experiment). Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy Website: www.totccast.com

This time around, the lads put a young science boy through some harrowing shit, make a new superhero team in space, make sex fun (finally) and partake of the finest cuts of dong this side of the Thames. Yet more goofs and good products from the boys you love! Currently Brainstorming: Knee Girls, Spicy Bath, Jim Pachmans, Flat, Long, Cock Rings, The Cock Fridge, Filet-min-Dong, Royal Squalor, Owen Goes Ghost, Snok X, Just a dash of Ashton, Consentecles, & Sad Sentinels: Sonic and the Rest (2019) Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy Website: www.totccast.com

This week, the lads do the stuff you love, like make a Finger Puppet Monstrosity, help a soft drink create the corporate monopoly it needs to lauch us into an Eleven Herbs and Spices Cyberpunk Future, and make a Furby you can fuck. Oh and there's more Jojo jokes. It's all here and it's all completely fucking putrid. Currently Brainstorming: Dental Jokes, Love Island: The Video Game, 11 Herbs and Spices, Vimto Piss, Lomg Sex Furby, Owen's Bounty, Rob Paulson is Yoko Taro, Planet Brexit, The Dio Room, Kid Wranglin: With Micheal Cera, Mouse Puppet Clitoris, Megalovania Shitposting, & Yoffie Presents FMA:B Tummy Theatre Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy Website: www.totccast.com

The boys are on a fucking roll this week, as our capitalist asses do the nasty thing to expoit your memories for profit. This week, we teach the boomers how to bend, ressurect Demons from the Ninth Pit, give a child an egG, and given Helen Mirren the Minerals she so desperately needs. It's think of the children! Currently Brainstorming: Robo-Hosts, Microwave Crimes, KFC-Bending, Meat Destiny, Apple 'Nades, "Teleport, Teleport, Attack", Booster Pack Gambling, The Bone Suite, Loose Egg in a bag, Bear Revelations, & T-Bag: Feat. Helen Mirren's Balls Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy Website: www.totccast.com

The boys are big dummies that just sort of... forgot to record an episode this week? So in it's stead, Owen has thrown together some of the best bits from the last year and a half of doing this dumb show, and splaying them up, back to back, for your enjoyment. It might be old, and barely qualifies as gold, it's Think of the Children! Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy Website: www.totccast.com

We took another break, so sue us. However, we're back on our weekly bullshit! Owen gets hyperfixated on a specific type of wine, Jay commits fully to canibalism, and the boys go totally tubular and ressurect a "beloved" piece of 90's fashion. It's all here on this week's Think of the Children! Currently Brainstorming: The Cucking Stool, The Baby Pocket, Viva-Piniata-Oh!, Vermouth, Anti-Drug Piracy, Medieval Crests, Illiteracy, Banjum-Kazambum, Sexy Pyramid Head, The Soap Shoe Rant, Toeys, & PROleTOEriat Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy Website: www.totccast.com

We're back after a not so short break! This week, Jay and Owen explain their dark sacrament involving the McNamara Family, rocket John Malkovich into new heights of stardom, as John Goodman, create a dark spherical new world in which we drive Micheal Cera insane, and the lads get bamboozled by Capitalism. It's all here, and it's back, baybeee! Currently Brainstorming: McNamara Stomach Lining, Nald's Eleven, "We're Back, Motherfucker: A Dinosaur's Story", Capcom teases Owen, Bougouise Lions, Capitalism Bamboozles Jay, Seagull Rituals, Genunine Criticisms of Rainbow Capitalism, Retreading Old Ground, & The Poly Planet Experiment (Starring Micheal Cera) Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Soul Sound: Draconihype, Tortured Soul Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy Website: www.totccast.com

This week, Jay is off being a good good physics boy, so Ismay Hutton (@aTeacupGamer) joins Owen in the office to do the nasty thing. This week, we go after that good SEO Juice and talk about Sonic. A lot. We also add parrots filled with disinfectant to all supermarkets, create a new iconic piece of merch, and (counterproductivley) fix Ismay's childhood. Currently Brainstorming: Cool Music and SFX, Sexy Gold Tit Daddy, Wiseau-Posting, Jim Eggman, Ismay is a Cop, Irn-Bru Flavours, A Week-Long Treat!, The Sub leading the Sub, Sonic's Ass, The Blockening Part 9: Sonic the Hedgehog, Dab on the Fash, The Important Questions, The Oldiest of Timeys, Invisible Potty, & Charlie's Angels 3: Ismay's Robo Moms Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy Website: www.totccast.com

Buckle the fuck up, kids, this one gets wild. Owen finds he's closer to a folk tale than he might think, Jay ingests crocodile penis, we dunk on horses and find help a young boy find the chaos emeralds. Strap in, get ready to laugh. Currently Brainstorming: Throwbacks, Bat Puns, Berserk Cauldron, Oblivion Soapbox, Cyber Dong, The Blockening Part 8: Danny DeVito, Captain Large, Outdated Animals, Musk, Jubblies, Street Sea Cucumbers, The Return of Fuck Jigsaw, That Damn 4th Chaos Emerald, Bleach Enemas, & Ben 10: The After Years Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy Website: www.totccast.com

We're back after a week off! This week, the lads do some truly terrible shit to a *lot* of planes, give Ballet an all new cultural significance, create a fun new video game about MILFs, and help a plucky little helicopter destroy all of anime. Also mid-2000's memes get a resurgance, it's buck-wild. Currently Brainstorming: Jay gets Fingerblasted, G-Spot Placement, Angelina Ballerina's Joint Problems, Ahegao Plane-Chan, Owen Explains a Joke, Jojo the Jet Plane, soisoisoi, Bears, Harvest Moon: Tofuden, An Official Callout, Weeb Friends Remover: Fire Red/Leaf Green, & My Mother's Protagonist Energy Transfered into me and now I have Radiation Poisoning! Z Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy Website: www.totccast.com

Yes, we're really calling the episode that, no we don't care about optics. The boys are back, sporting a fresh new look! This week, we make one old woman the new cornerstone of all anime, take on a military contract and make a rad new Nintendo 64 game. It's the boys you love with a fresh coat of paint! Currently Brainstorming: Bad Jokes, Cock Exercises, Dirty Money Boy, The Blockening Part 7: Chaka Khan, Spoon Oba-san: New Shonen Protagonist, Ballistic Beyblades, Alan Cumming in a Box, The Twitter Bear, Another Anime Tangent, Pick Up Lines, Sean Astin's Monster Musume, Jay just reads a Wikipedia Page Synopsis, Mr. Jones' Lizard Fuckin' Pills, Virgin Soul Lube, & Turok: Dinosapien (N64 Video Game) Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Soul Sound: Draconihype, Tortured Soul Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy Website: www.totccast.com

It's our birthday, and we'll podcast if we want to! We've been ruining childhoods for a calendar year now, so we decided to go back to our first episode and re-ruin all the stuff we did then, with a hot new twist. This week, we teach the children vital office skills, send the office to Deep Space, create a dark clown entity and ask "What if Children raised babies?". It's all here in this Birthday Special of Think of the Children! Currently Brainstorming: The Herpes of Podcasts, Minion Love Eggs, The Office: Deep Space 9, Incel Categorization, Chernobyl Tourism, Jay's True Self, Runescape for Microsoft Office 2019, Comrade Raven: The Pagan Communist, Specialist Shlurp Correspondent, My Name is Ozymandias, Jim Broadbent VS. The Machines, A Very Horny Bionicle Fuck Adventure, Piss, Bojangles the Clown Pimp Cryptid, & Rugrats (2019 Reality Show) Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Soul Sound: Draconihype, Tortured Soul Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy Website: www.totccast.com

This week, the boys make up for Jay forgetting about the gays so often, by getting very very gay! This week, we make some art-house cinema, some fun new cocktails, and make children terrified of the thing they love most! Come in, stay a while, we have Greek Statues... Currently Brainstorming: Finishing the Fight, The Gooseberry Fool Returns, Stupid Sexy Mobius, Shogeki no Arisu, Blood and Blood (Period), Vodka Sharts, Hugh Jackman Railing Someone, Watch my Chops: I love You, Numerical Neckbeards, Suncream Flavoured Troll Cum, Ray's Good, Ol' Dick Holsters, & Minions: Fuck 'Em Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy Website: www.totccast.com

WELP. We jump the horny shark a little bit on this one, gang, won't lie. However, it's still very good. This week, Owen and Jay make a tremendous discovery, put discuss the finer details of Racoon sex, and raise an army of Chinchillas. It's all here and it's all gross. Currently Brainstorming: Chinchilla Delivery Service, The Final Boss of Rat Fucking, Teenage Mutant Bachelor Turtles, Cock Maths, Rupert the Bear is a Chode, The Gooseberry Fool, A Discovery, Barb: the Pervert, Big Ol' Bat Biddies, Sonic the Hedgehog's Sexual Exploits, The Blinding of Owen, Jumping the Horny Shark, The Other Fuck, Mr. Beefcurtains, & Quickdraw McGraw: He has hands now. Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy Website: www.totccast.com

It's a few days late, because production schedules, am I right? This week, Jay brings a chaotic energy into the studio, which in turn, affects the podcast. However, we still create a Lovecraftian nightmare, give a cryptid a reality show, and create a dastardly serial killer that would *get it*. It's more you love from the boys you love! Currently Brainstorming: Jay forgets the gays exist, The Shadow over Balamory, Jay forgets the Hoobs exist, Smnmsnmmnsgnger, The Personality Forge, Useful Children, The Gloved One, Painful Memories of Childhood Love, A Stranger's Cum, More Fart Jokes, The Blockening Part 6: Jedi's Paradise, Portland Bill: The Pirate Cryptid, Goonies: The Later Years, Fuck Jigsaw: The Jigsaw that Fucks, & Think of the Children (2019 Podcast/The Pyramid Scheme) Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy Website: www.totccast.com

The boys are back in town! This week, Owen and Jay discuss a fun new tasty, and deadly, microtransaction. That's just the start! Also, half the goddamn episode disappears into the ether and we had to record a new second half! But despite that it's still really really good? We're firing on full this week! Currently Brainstorming: The Aardvark Wars, Owen's Noble Steed, Mr. Kipling Battle Packs, Fuck the Pandas, Fire Bars, How to make content, Take 2, Hard-On Tim, Dangermau5, Website Absorption, The Cosmic Cat, & Dr. Snuggles: The Cursed Tapes Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy Website: www.totccast.com

Jay's back and he's hornier than ever. In this All-Disney/Pixar episode of Think of the Children, we make some Kingdom Hearts jokes, make ocean cum, and make Harvey Wienstien no longer alive! Currently Brainstorming: Kingdom Hearts Jokes, Think of the Children: A Musical, Contract Law, Brexit Update!, Ocean Cum/Land Cum, Telling Harvey Wienstien to kill himself, 2019: Ha, Gay, Shang's Abs, "the Huns be nasty", Brothers Grimm: The Anime, Animal Fucking Hole, Meme Review Part 2, Xehanort Powers & NCIS: Zootopia Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy Website: www.totccast.com

This week, Jay is off to do his exams, so Owen is joined in the offices by friend of the show, voice of Ronah on Not Saving the Realm and good Dad, Bonnie Lewis! This week, we do something significant for Mumford and Sons, revive classic 70's Stop Motion, and give Seth Green work, cause lord knows he needs it. Currently Brainstorming: Futher's Day, Brian and Woman, Dick Tounges, Bonnie ages before our very eyes, Here Comes Mumford and Sons, Piss Foods, Meat Syrup, The Blockening Part 5: JK Rowling, Pagbuss, The Big Toke, Soup Dragon Law, & Neon Genesis Eveclangelion Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy Website: www.totccast.com

It's 2019, and your favorite boys are back in the office! Jay's got a new mic, Owen has a new sense of self-worth and it's all fucking rosy. This week, we have children fighting animals, children fighting with extinct animals, Murder Most Foul, and a Sociopathic Journalist! It's all here, and it's all the worst on Think of the Children! Currently Brainstorming: The Future!, Children Drinkin' Whiskey, Nald the Finance/Legal/Security Dragon, Municipal Zoo Planning, Oswald And Jeff, Jetsunma Tenzin Palmo: A Real Life Hero, The Dinosaur Shit Fighting Show, Chronal Crimes, Dragons Fucking Cars, Murderous Sea Captains, Barista Hot Cocklate, Jay goes off on Art again, ScarJo Riffs, & Goldie Gold and Action Jack: The Untold Story Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy

Ding Dong Merrily on High, Children, it's Christmas Time here in our office. All the employees have gone home for the holidays... those that survived, anyway. Cha'boys are still here burning the midnight oil for one last blow out show for the year. This week, we punch some babies, give Jesus the chance to bite back, get some kids drunk, and worship the Island Gods. Stuff your face with Turkey and Comedy this holiday season! Currently Brainstorming: Scata, Greg the Intern, Son of the Farmer and Son of the Father, Moordor, Razor Candy, Dessert Trading, Condiment Crimes, Owen's Cloaca Incident, The Cost of Human Life, ASMR, Bendydicks Cumsabunch, Reflections, Anthrax and Cum, & Drunk Nativity (With kids!) Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy

This week, the boys figure out their Wu Tang names and the Wu Tang Names of their pen names. In addition, we give mice the anarchic revolutionary icon they so desperately crave, go round the twist, and finally, reach apotheosis: create furry porn. It's all here this week! Currently Brainstorming: Sewer People/Anime Fans, The Code Word, No Gods, No Masters, Only Mice, Merch Ideas, Pen Names, Sarkastik Contender, Swordballs, Derek, The Aber Frontier, A Forgery, Schulrmp, The Blockening Part 4, Secret Dad: Tony, Anus Mouth, TV Magic, & Dogtanian: A Furry Porn Spectacular Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy

With the news that Tumblr is waging a war on porn, we pick up the slack and do what is probably our horniest episode yet. Which is saying a lot, especially for us. This week, we create a fun new fruit snack, make some original IP and teach the children the value of disappointment. Currently Brainstorming: Female Presenting Nipples, The Poddy Awards, Stealth Rock, Cum Fly with Me, Musical Interludes, Fullmetal Big Cook, The Harem Department, Making something better?, iPodcast, With Apologies to Ms. Hutton, TOTC: The Video Game, Dadson, Queen Delano, & Lunchable Predictions Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy

Is this The End of Think of the Children? I mean, no, it isn't, but we got you there for a second, huh? This week, we take a look at some magnetic toys, some marionettes and create a potato abomination of which we are ashamed. Enjoy! Currently Brainstorming: Name Confusion, Nonchalant Murderers, Jay's Brazzer's Story, Gundambirds, Hooded Dark Magician, Guns of the Podcastriats, Grim Mask of Joy, The Nineteenth Truth, Professional Foley Work, Too Dark?, Pre-Teen Communist Arms Dealing, Gestalt Potato Consciousness, Orgasm Clickbait, Sonic Transmutation, & Barney the Dinosaur (2018) Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy

I mean no hyperbole when I say that this is our best episode yet. It's a yuck a minute, we really on the fuckin ball with this one. As well as giving Cera some work, we also kick Jeff Bezos around some, break Jay's heart, and send some puppets off to war. It's a fucking *rollercoaster* my dudes. Currently Brainstorming: McNamara = Best Girl, Juggling Fish, DDPS, The Sword of Damassstinks, Horsepowers, Micheal Cera: The Movie, Big Powerful Heart, Dogwelder, Puppet Vietnam, Boypusi, Jeff Bezos Cock Assault, Jay Wins, & It Came from the Butt Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast Discord: https://discordapp.com/invite/fkZGJuy

We're still off schedule, but we ain't stopping! This week, the boys reach deep into the Bear well. Owen creates a fantastic new anime OP, Jay hates art, and the boys kill a bunch of aspiring celebrities while they race towards a boat. Currently Brainstorming: Jay's Dick, Animal Economics, Pot Shots at Nomura, BTEC Lego, Bearem Anime, Hetalia 2: We all fuckin' a Bear, Corbyn-Senpai, Real Truths, Favours for Corbyn, Ha, Got 'Em, The best advice Jay has ever given, & Blue Peter: Worldwide Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Record Scratch by Luffy Anime Interlude: TAIATARI★Romance feat. GUMI, Souichi Sakagami (Trial & Error) Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast

After the spirits got inside Owen's PC and done broke it, it's our Halloween special! Only 4 days late! Which is incredibly on brand for us, if you think about it. This week, we get very horny, drag each other to hell and ruin a cult classic, all while talking about various types of jizz. So you know, on brand again. Currently Brainstorming: Jay's Pussy, A very horny Halloween, Finance Bag, Communist Dragon Utopia, Ghost Truck, Five Nights at Freddies the ARG, A very Christian Podcast, A Yorkshire Lass and the Frog, Pret Proximity, Virgin Grandmothers, Duck Cum, Bus Bus Plane Crash, The Anime Sins, Garbage Boy Stink Man, Eternal Smashmouth, Pussy Pussy Poo, The Shining 2: Still Shinin', & Hocus Pocus: Directed by and starring Stephen King Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast

The title is a funny joke about how the episode is both weirdly centred around dogs, and also how it's because we're ill. It's funny. Laugh. Either way, the boys are back off hiatus to continue to do that funky thing they do so good and mess your nostalgia up proper, like, guv. Currently Brainstorming: Cap Conversion, Jay kills the brand, We lose the dang plot, Roach out to Nike, Fartgate, Jay's Pantsu, Dynamo Sneakers, Tandem Bodily Functions, A Scientific Debate, RAF Recruitment Dog, Funny D-Day Jokes, Audio Hell, A Dramatic Reading, Purina is made of Cats!, Owen becomes Yokai, & Sword Art Online III: Dog's Life Online Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast

A day late, sure, but we still here! Jay is back and has virtually nothing to contribute. This week, we sell out, invent a new type of nature documentary, introduce a new segment and break a few eggs. Currently Brainstorming: Hot Otaku, Phantom Flatmates, Sexual Congress, Mini? Cheddars, Radioactive Spider Cum, Holy St. Brendan, No Blood, Just Spiders, Owen potentially ruins his life, Shit-Eatin' Tim, McHacks, Reggie Fils-Amie Mech Suit, Pulling a Jay, Grapes, Just straight up pornography, & The Magic Omlette Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Break: Baffy, The Numberless Circling Cows of the Crop (Cow Pie) Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast

This week, Jay has fucked off to Spain, and therefore missed out on this three-way (podcast) between Owen and the hilarious ladies from the #relevant podcast, Erin and Kaedi! Join us as we talk about Sex Amazon, killing children on the playground and on the Oregon Trail via opioids! It's a fucking buck-wild ride, dog, buckle up. Currently Brainstorming: The Shrek Experience, Shittin' Diseases, Snake Oil Alchemy, A list of British Things, Healthcare Deep Cuts, Beanie Babies but Drugs, We go to a Zoo, Bougie Meals on Wheels, Owen's Condom Emporium, Sex Amazon, Free Ice Cream!, Pimping Ryan Gosling, The complete opposite of the show, And Children killing themselves for Sport Get more #relevant! Twitter: @Weresorelevant Podcast: http://ow.ly/S1Hm30j8OOv Erin: @realeringarnett Kaedi: @KaediAnn Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast

The Exec Boys Made Good are back for another episode. This week, we tackle the impeccable acting skills of Brendan Fraiser, Weeaboos, Jedward, and sliding into the DM's of the Commander in Chief. You're welcome ;) Currently Brainstorming: Dog Rights, Dressing Gown Etiquette, A Field Guide to Dragons, Charisma given Flesh, An Amazing Beautiful Good Boy, Harassing Famous People, Brendan Fraiser Induced Semen, The Vaping/E-Cig Confusion, Pop Stars in Platemail, The Jedward Experiment, Jaeger, The Very Active Jedward Fandom, Obstruction of Justice, Cheeto Seduction: A Radio Play, Jay Rage, Spanish 101, & Beyblade with Fidget Spinners Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Record Scratch by Luffy Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast

The boys are back in town, this week mainly hitting up shows about bands featuring rodents and marsupials. We also fuck around with cryptids and Dolph Lundgren, which is a recipe for disaster. Currently Brainstorming: Amateur Topology, Nald/Noel the Gold Dragon, The Not so Secret Saturdays, Interview with a Monster, The Meme Review, Hedgehog Canon, Mouse Science, Rastamouse: Behind the Music, Jay reads off yet another *fucking* IMDb page, The Robotnik/Eggman Confusion, A Taxfunded Robot Conversion Machine, and Dolph Lundgren's Brain Jitsu (A series of University Lectures) Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast

After another strage break, Owen and Jay return in a tour de force to talk about boning on the high seas, geometry wars, the French Aesthetic and go off on yet more weird tangents. It's all you love from the boys you love, it's Think of the Children! Currently Brainstorming: Fake Lottery Tickets, Extraplanar Rhombuses, Lizard Porn, The Shadow over the Big Blue House, Cosmic Barber, The sad truth about gay pirates, Jay continues to read cast lists off IMDB, Butch Hartman strikes again, Jay's terrible opinions, Soy is Unbreakable, [STEPHEN KING], "Night Night, Bigot", and Jojo's Bizzare Big-Top Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast

We're back! This time around, we lean hard into puppetry, old school cartoons, and the terrifying knowledge that we are simply cogs in a machine running slowly towards the heat death of the universe. It's all fun and games on Think of the Children! Currently Brainstorming: Office Architecture, The Bay of Carolina, Nihilism, The chances of anything coming from Hoobland, Good news, everyone!, H472, Another moment of genuine advice, People are ass sometimes, Mysterons=Mysterio, A very sad allegory for capitalism, A Kingdom Hearts Radio Play, and The Very Regular Show Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast

This week, we're joined by a special guest, Ismay (aTeacupGamer), and we're all very tired! This translates to us all slowly losing our sanity and Jay turning into a maniacal supervillain Currently Brainstorming: A Prepared Statement, Pizza Gremlins, Nautical Sex, A Very Horny Fish Themed Zoombini Fuck Adventure, Monika gets in the waveforms, Snake Girls/Snake Guns, A fun new murder contraption, Johnathan Freeman, The original Dickbutt, Pissburg Pigs, Comedy 101, Anime Eyes, Owen and Ismay lose their goddamn minds, Defenestration, Jay starts chatting shit Jay extends our pain Jay causes us to beg for death Just Jay. Get more Ismay! Twitter: @aTeacupGamer Twitch: https://www.twitch.tv/ateacupgamer Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast

This episode is really horny for some reason? We talk about fuckin' like a lot, idk. There are jokes in here, too though, so it's all good stuff as per. Currently Brainstorming: Subway Mathematics, Jay's Travel Stories, Glacier Pacing, Innuendo Jinx, Dick Jokes... again, The Bubonic Plague, Banana Hype, You're a rapper, Charlie Brown! Music History with Professor Jay, Beautiful Boy Band Simulator 2016, Straight* up Fuckin', Be horny, get success, and Noctis and the Holograms Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast

We're broadening our horizons here at TOTC, now everything is welcome. TV, Movies, Toys, Food, The Outdoors, The concept of youth itself, it's all here and all ripe for destruction... Currently Brainstorming: The Goblin Curse, Politics!, An expanded perspective, Rita, Atrius [sic], Action Bloke, The Book of Cretins, Space Pineapple, Frozen Vodka, Toilet Humour, Sentient Plastic Collosi, The steely embrace of Mecha-Christ, and Battle Royale. Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast

This week, we're back to being idiots surrounding a box, lean hard into hot puppet on puppet action, force political dichotomies to co-exist in literally the same body, and discuss vore some more because of course we do. Also Owen talks about musicals again, because he's a jackass. Currently Brainstorming: Utter failure, The worst pun, Jizz, Too Many Heathers references, Wolfenstein Tween, Muppets in Westeros, One Fine Day, The invisible hand of the free market, Polar Bear Etymology, The Devil's Lettuce, Derek the Kingpin, Bill and Ben (2018 Movie) Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast

We're getting intellectual at TOTC Towers and are taking a look at some books! They're like TV without pictures. Join us again as we make some children's lives more miserable, ramble for 20 minutes about Warrior Cats and establish a brand new religion... Currently Brainstorming: The Highest Praise, The Great Undertale Debate, Lemony Snickerdoodle's Misery Children, The Duncan Quagmire Defense Squadron, Puddleshine, "Medicine-Cat Apprentice", Really honest critiques out of nowhere, Cat NASA, and The Church of The Harry Potter/My Immortal Neural Net. Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast

The office is very hot and we probably both have heatstroke, so the format is a little different this week. We roll all of our ideas together into one hot, sticky mess that just gets... everywhere. Also if you actually wanna remake The Last Jedi, this one probably ain't for you. Just a heads up, Currently Brainstorming: Arguing about Mass Effect Fields, Dr. Little's Retro Meme Machine, Star Wars Hot Takes, Willem DaFoe in Drag, +3 Incest Modifiers, Jay grows as a person, Bad Texan Accents, and PewDiePie presents: Treasure Planet, A D&D Actual Play Series (Youtube Red Original). Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: www.patreon.com/totccast

Jay returns from his voyage into the ether, and he's ready to ruin your childhood like old times. This time we talk about weird animation, dating sims, profound japanese shit, and continue to revolutionise the British prison system. Currently Brainstorming: Ravaged by Disease, Apologies to Jay's Girlfriend, Psycho-Sexual Cowboys, The jokes just stop for a bit, Doki Doki Octopus Dare, Jay annoys Owen's neighbors, Vore, ASMR, More Drag Race, and The Slammer (2018) Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/totccast

This week, Aemyn Connolly of But Yeah Podcast fame enters our esteemed office to discuss a plethora of stuff from down under, including but not limited to, how to become good friends, drowning a man in a barrel and cooking some grub before burning down a hospital. Also Owen talks about some vampire nonsense from Canada for a bit. Currently Brainstorming: The Podcasters we met along the way, Tonal Inconsistencies, More Puppets, Just Worms, Ancient Greek Soap Operas, Owen is consumed by Tommy Wiseau, Time's Inexorable Pull, All Aussie Suicide Squad, and An actual sign-off. Get more of Aemyn!: Twitter: @aemyn/@butyeahpod/@OLBPod Website: www.butyeahpodcast.com Music: Intro: Baffy, Money Man Outro: Baffy, Purple Wine Used under Creative Commons Twitter: @totccast Email: totccast@gmail.com