Essential Change: The Podcast

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Helping Families, Health Practitioners, Clergy, and Social Service Professionals: Eliminate, Manage, and Prevent Destructive behavior, Detrimental Procrastination, and Relapse, using Life Style Management Systems and Leverage based conditioning.

Richard


    • May 29, 2025 LATEST EPISODE
    • every other week NEW EPISODES
    • 11m AVG DURATION
    • 155 EPISODES


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    Latest episodes from Essential Change: The Podcast

    Working Without a Mission is Hard Work

    Play Episode Listen Later May 29, 2025 10:49


    Send us a textWhen the mission is unclear, the work is that much harder. To use a football analogy, Our current system wants to teach our young adults how to do a great endzone dance and spike the ball, but we don't want to teach the basics of blocking and tackling.Blocking is recognizing and blocking out distractions. Blocking out those who have doubtful words and actions against Your child's recovery efforts. Tackling involves aggressively taking actions that change habits, which in turn change outcomes. It's all about coming together as a team and knowing what your true vision of a championship is. Parenting Your Child in Recovery

    You Not Be Welcome When You Arrive: Your Recovery Destination

    Play Episode Listen Later May 6, 2025 11:14


    Send us a textPreparing Your Young Adult to Handle Hidden ResistanceOne of the most overlooked but critical parts of preparing a young adult for lasting recovery—or any serious self-improvement—is helping them understand how people around them might react when they start to change.We expect enemies and strangers to doubt them.We don't always expect that some of the toughest resistance will come from people who love them.Sometimes, when a young adult starts showing real growth—building better habits, setting clearer boundaries, standing stronger—people close to them feel unsettled. It's not necessarily malice or cruelty. It's fear. It's sadness. It's a sense of being left behind.The important thing to prepare them for is this: Not every negative reaction they get is a sign they're doing something wrong. More often, it's a sign they're doing something right.When growth exposes old wounds in others, the easiest thing for a young adult to do is to shrink themselves back down to fit. To stop growing so fast. To apologize for wanting better.But the truth is: they're not responsible for making everyone else comfortable with their progress.Here's what you can do to prepare them:1. Normalize It Early:Let them know it's normal if a friend or family member seems irritated, distant, or critical. Change creates waves."Sometimes when you start doing really well, it can make others feel things they don't know how to say. That's about them, not about you."2. Frame It as a Positive Indicator:Help them reframe emotional distance or minor pushback as evidence that they're growing—and that growth is often contagious, even if it's uncomfortable at first."You're not leaving people behind—you're showing them it's possible to move forward. Some will catch up. Some won't. Either way, you're lighting the way."3. Teach Steadiness, Not War:The goal isn't to fight back or "prove" anything. It's to stay steady, kind, and focused. Model how to keep moving without resentment or bitterness."Stay open-hearted. Keep your boundaries clear. Let your actions speak louder than any argument."4. Encourage Self-Validation:Recovery and growth are already hard enough without waiting for applause. Teach them how to validate themselves internally so they aren't dependent on outside approval to stay on course."You're doing this for you. Be proud of every small step, even if no one else notices yet."Remember:You can't clear every obstacle for them.But you can plant truths in them now that will carry them through the tougher moments later.Prepare them for the unexpected emotional storms—and they'll learn to sail right through them.Your love, your words, and your preparation can give your young adult the confidence to keep growing, even when it's hard. Parenting Your Child in Recovery

    Creativity is Communication

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 13, 2025 8:07


    Send us a textIn today's podcast, I will discuss the third vital part of communication: Creativity. Communication is not limited to what you take in, hear, see, and feel, and what you put out in the form of speaking, writing, and expressions but what you put out for the work to consume. Without the ability to determine and execute your creative expression, your young adult is doomed to frustration.  This seminar series is not about traditional rehab models. Instead, it's about Leveraged-Based Tapered Life Management—a proven system that turns external accountability into internal habit and sets young adults up for sustainable success.Parents and mentors, you deserve a clear, actionable path to support your young adult's transformation. You'll learn how to: ✔ Build an effective support network without feeling overwhelmed. ✔ Help your young adult make an immediate 180-degree turn toward success. ✔ Eliminate the guilt, shame, and blame that often stall progress. ✔ Equip them with a Maximum Achievement Mentality for lifelong success.

    5 things About This Podcast: A Throwback Episode

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 8, 2025 13:07


    Send us a textIn today's episode, I want to throw it back to my first full podcast. I talked about the five things I wanted you to know about the show. At the start of this journey, which commences on September 14th, 2020, I didn't know what I was doing, much like now, but I was optimistic, much like now. It was always about making a team of people and doing tasks to help the families of young adults in trouble. I wanted to emphasize TEAM. I wanted to talk about PREVENTION. I wanted to join everyone who had the same mission as I did. Nothing has changed, but this is a fun recap and trip down memory lane.This seminar series is not about traditional rehab models. Instead, it's about Leveraged-Based Tapered Life Management—a proven system that turns external accountability into internal habit and sets young adults up for sustainable success.Parents and mentors, you deserve a clear, actionable path to support your young adult's transformation. You'll learn how to: ✔ Build an effective support network without feeling overwhelmed. ✔ Help your young adult make an immediate 180-degree turn toward success. ✔ Eliminate the guilt, shame, and blame that often stall progress. ✔ Equip them with a Maximum Achievement Mentality for lifelong success.

    Guilt, Shame, and Blame: The Family Cancers

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 1, 2025 10:02


    Send us a textGuilt, Shame, and Blame are the cancers of the family of young adults in trouble. These three cancers inhibit forgiveness and progress. Trouble in a family is no respecter of persons or positions, and it can and will strike the best and worst of us. All three, as a team, will destroy futures and destroy happiness. They ( Guilt, Shame, and Blame) are used as weapons to mask perceived weaknesses and provide a false sense of defense. Until we learn to acknowledge these cancers, we can never move on toward healing and, ultimately, prosperity. Parenting Your Child in Recovery

    What Do You Do When Your Young Adult in Trouble is not Hearing You?

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 23, 2025 11:42


    Send us a textMoving forward when the way is unclear requires the right motivation and a leap of faith. Turning the lights on is not always as easy as flipping a switch. In today's Podcast we talk about initiating essential change when the people we need to help don't hear the message.This thought was born from a conversation with friends in my podcast mastermind group. Meaningful conversation for situations when failure is not an option but you don't feel heard. Parenting Your Child in Recovery

    Judgement can be a life-Threatening Waste of Time

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 16, 2025 12:03


    Send us a textJudgment, for better or worse, is one of our most prominent human conditions. When we judge ourselves, the people we love, and the processes we build as a society, we can't see what's really important. None of us are immune to judgment, but we must develop the ability to shed judgment as quickly as possible and move toward solutions. Judgment can be a detrimental and unforgivable waste of time when our priority should be the life of someone we love. Parenting Your Child in Recovery

    Opportunity in Detrimental Circumstances for Families of Young Adults in Trouble

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 8, 2025 14:48


    Send us a textOpportunity in detrimental situations is a life-saving skill for the parents and mentors of young adults in trouble. In one minute, what seems like an inevitable disaster can lead to new opportunities and possibilities. In this podcast, we look at the "Wall" Attitude and Vision, which can turn a life around in the direst of conditions and create a life worth living. Parenting Your Child in Recovery

    Is Doing The Same as Being?: The Anatomy of a Transformation

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 2, 2025 8:41


    Send us a textIs a transformation just a matter of stringing together a new set of actions, or is it a complete change of one's self? As professional or volunteer helpers, we rely on suggesting a new set of actions when we look to help a young adult and their family create a new path. Does the mere implementation of these actions constitute an immediate change, or does the accumulation of these actions bring about, in time, a more profound realization of who they are?  Parenting Your Child in Recovery

    Are you afraid to "Want" for your troubled child?

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 15, 2025 14:08


    Send us a textAre you afraid to " Want " for your troubled child? What you want for your child can come from a limiting place or a place of abundance and increase. What is in your past in terms of what you deserve or what you can achieve that influences how you want for your child? Taking a look at your attitudes can accelerate the possibilities of your child's future. Parenting Your Child in Recovery

    Feelings of Rejection are Hurting Your Family

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 9, 2025 11:57


    Send us a textRejection is a part of life, and learning to deal with it can make all the difference between success and failure. When feelings of rejection put your family's future at risk, it is time to confront those feelings and re-see, re-design, and re-commit to a better way of handling the rejection emotion and saving your young adult's life. Parenting Your Child in Recovery

    R.A.C.E. This is an Emergency!

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 1, 2025 13:26


    Send us a textOn today's podcast, I wanted to associate the fire prevention acronym R.A.C.E with the emergency we experience when someone we love, our young adult, is in trouble. Setting a clear path plan that is not about blame or guilt that sets the mindset and the tone for success is possible when we start the right way. Parenting Your Child in Recovery

    Parenting Your Child in Recovery

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 12, 2025 15:36


    Send us a textWelcome to the "Parenting Your Child in Recovery" Podcast. Let's talk about Changing your families future and transforming your young adults life.     Turning early sobriety into long-term sobriety requires more than "cheerleading." It should not include "preparing for relapse." It requires your direct involvement and a program that sends your young adult in a new direction with a new focus.      Parenting Your Child in Recovery

    Willpower: A Waste of Good Energy

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 5, 2024 9:41


    Send us a textThe act of using Willpower is weak. It is a defensive position that seeks to defend the indefensible. In this show, we will discuss four other ways you and your young adult can use your power in ways that aim to make an Essential Change that moves life forward. Parenting Your Child in Recovery

    Introduction to " The Help Syndrome"

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 24, 2024 15:06


    Send us a textEvery action and reaction to addiction or behavioral problems in our adults is a form of asking for help. Today, I want to talk about the phenomenon we call  " The Help Syndrome." I see it as the delicate dance between the " ASK" for help and the relation between our answers and the actually heard answers. Parenting Your Child in Recovery

    The Biggest Question in Recovery

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 21, 2024 17:44


    Send us a textIn today's show, " The Biggest Question in Recovery," I wanted to talk about a recent post I sent to some of the face groups I have been privileged to be a member of. I raised the question, " I had an unexpected question asked by someone I care deeply about yesterday. " Why should I bother even trying to stop drinking and doing drugs ?". How would you answer that?" There were so many exciting responses and insights. I wanted to share my thoughts. Parenting Your Child in Recovery

    Commitment: First, Last, and Everything

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 16, 2024 9:58


    Send us a textToday, I want to discuss the very first order of business: Commitment. Without it as the first and primary focus, there can be no Recovery. Commitment is faith realized in three stages: Process, Follow through, and Outcome.  Parenting Your Child in Recovery

    Hitting It Off Right

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 13, 2024 11:23


    Send us a textIn this episode of " Parenting Your Child in Recovery," we talk about " Hitting it off Right." A young adult is at the starting point of their life. It is so important to start as strong as possible. Using a golfing analogy, for every degree the start is off target, it becomes harder to avoid missing the fairway, landing in the bunker, or worse, in the water.We also talk about my desire to start back with the interview show, The Soap Box" I interview people involved in Recovery, hearing about current projects and their strong opinions about Recovery. It is a fast-paced, fun interview that lets people "Get up on their Soap Box." Parenting Your Child in Recovery

    A Wolf in Sheep's Clothing

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 6, 2024 7:48


    Send us a textToday's show is called " A Wolf in Sheep's Clothing"—dangerous things dressed as safe and comfortable. As parents, mentors, and families, we want to see our young adults safe, and that is the picture we paint. The wolf is easier to spot if you look for him in obvious places, such as signs, symptoms, and risk factors. Parenting Your Child in Recovery

    "Oh, it's Just a Phase" Getting a Jump on Recovery Series

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 4, 2024 16:50


    Send us a textToday's show highlights the danger of a simple phrase, "It's just a phase." When dealing with teens or young adults at risk for trouble, Phases are warnings of danger and opportunities to intervene. We briefly examine the five stages of addiction in teens and young adults and suggest a mindset that looks to get the jump on disaster. Parenting Your Child in Recovery

    A Recovery Story: Shelleen B

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 2, 2024 14:54


    Send us a textToday's show is a thank-you shout-out to Shelleen B. She was kind enough to respond to my post in FB group " Both sides of Addiction". Her short paragraph summed up my entire message. It was inspirational. I took a few minutes to thank her and her family and briefly analyzed just what it meant to me. Parenting Your Child in Recovery

    That Mindset stuff again?

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 28, 2024 7:25


    Send us a textYour family's mindset towards recovery is not the product of hocus pocus or trickery; it is a choice. This PC is a modest rant against those who believe "mindset" is a gimmick and not their highest priority.  Parenting Your Child in Recovery

    Creative Recovery Mindset

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 26, 2024 5:03


    Send us a textIn my opinion, recovery, or any essential change, can only be achieved by a mindset change. The most important of those mindsets is a creativity mindset. In this quick PC, I introduce Creativity as a must-have in the toolbag. And Remember, Let's get out there and help somebody Get Better, Stay Better, and Be Better. Parenting Your Child in Recovery

    Reasons versus Excuses

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 20, 2024 12:20


    Send us a textI'm happy to be back talking to the parents and mentors of young adults in recovery! Today, here's a quick recap of our mission and a little about my new baby boomers and Gen Xers group. Also, here is a quick preview of this week's upcoming Zoom call, where we will discuss the topic of " Creation" and its role in the recovery process of your young adult.Remember to help somebody Get Better, Stay Better, and Be Better.

    Big Destinations in Recovery.

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 27, 2024 10:53


    Send us a Text Message.Today we take a look at a post that highlights some of my signature views on Recovery:Our children are strong and built for big destinations. Leaving harmful substances behind is just the beggining of the journey.  Clearing that obstacle will reveal opportunities without limit.

    Do it with Passion

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 23, 2024 11:22


    Send us a Text Message.In this Group Cast I want to discuss this post: Don't be afraid to make it about mission and passion. It is scary, but you can't go wrong. Accept support and forgive your detractors.Lets break it down and see how we feel about it!

    What do I mean by " Unreachable"

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 21, 2024 11:19


    Send us a Text Message.In this Group cast, I wanted to explain just what I mean by using the term                   " Unreachable" . I wanted to explain my views and thoughts on responses to the post.

    Advocate for Prevention

    Play Episode Listen Later May 15, 2024 9:14


    Send us a Text Message.Advocate for Prevention. Most of us in this forum have experienced the pain of substance use and behavioral problems. We should be strong advocates for Prevention. Prevention not only helps those behind us who will travel the same dangerous pathways, but the tools, skills, and mindset associated with Prevention are the same tools that destroy the threat of relapse: share and benefit.

    Disease or Choice ?

    Play Episode Listen Later May 12, 2024 9:26


    Send us a Text Message.Asking the question, Disease or Choice. This phrase is the Substance Use version of the Chicken or the Egg. Can you have one without the other? Does it even matter? Is there an ultimate answer?

    Getting That Determined Outcome Mindset in Your Young Adults Recovery

    Play Episode Listen Later May 8, 2024 12:33


    Send us a Text Message.Lets talk about this post:Your family must adopt a determined outcome mindset, seeing and feeling, and only give life to the results you want. Failure is not a viable option anyway. Make the only real goal the most significant goal you can imagine. Failure is not a feasible option. We accept the pain without question, but we freely question our rights to happiness.

    How to Create a New Life Map For Your Young Adult in Recovery

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 2, 2024 14:39


    A life map is a set of beliefs that point to a destination. These beliefs can be true or false, but the map does not care. In this episode, we will tell you and your child how to see the map for what it is and eventually learn how to erase the old map and create a new one with your chosen destination.

    No Room for Failure in Your Child's Recovery

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 20, 2024 11:20


    There is no room for failure in your child's Recovery. Today, I want to talk about the elephant in the room. All statistics and horror stories point to failure having the upper hand in the recovery game. Like most things, it is a mindset, but whenever there is more than one party involved, the mindset is very complicated. It is like whack a mole. As soon as you get two, the third one rears up its ugly head. The importance of plan, direction, and momentum is so very important. 

    The Biggest Lie in Your Childs Recovery ( The Emperor's New Clothes )

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 17, 2024 21:28


    Welcome back to "Parenting Your Child in Recovery". Today, we want to talk about what we think is the biggest lie told to you by the recovery community ( Treatment systems and treatment professionals). Yes, they know a lot of facts, but what they don't know is your child. So often, they will attempt to impress you with facts, figures, and statistics, and you are talked down to if you question them. It is time for you to understand you have the big megaphone in the room. Learn to use it. I teach parents of young adults in recovery the skills they need to support their child's continued sobrietyhttps://linktr.ee/2ndStartsFacebook Group " Parenting Your Child in Recovery"https://bit.ly/3BsVkeZ

    The Soap Box: Steve Knapp

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 26, 2023 28:34


     Steve Knapp is an Addiction Recovery Coach and Co-host of the "Through the Glass Recovery Podcast." Steve's Soap Box issues are the Normalization of drinking in general, Addiction in the workplace, and how Addiction remains misunderstood in our society. Steve hails from Canada and loves spur of the moment travel. You can find Steve at Through the Glass Recovery: throughtheglassrecovery.com and on all social media platforms (Instagram, Facebook, Tiktok, LinkedIn) @throughtheglassrecovery For more information about the free Zoom meetings they host on Monday nights at 8:30 pm EST, visit our website and sign up for their weekly newsletter. Our Podcast - Through the Glass Recovery Podcast - can be found on any podcast listening platform.

    Parenting Your Child in Recovery

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 18, 2023 11:07


    The podcast that speaks directly to the Parents and support network of Young Adults in Recovery and the helping professionals who work so hard to help them in their journey.Shout out to my friends at TherapyEverywhere         Created and currently manage my website ( 2ndStarts.com )        Based in Isreal and ( at my last contact ) they are wellI was privileged to be a guest on the " Through the Glass Recovery Podcast " podcast.         Format: formerly addicted guest panel         Gracious enough to allow me to sit in and offer comments         I learned so much in those situationsTopic: Boundaries         The very nature of a Boundary          Takes energy to confront, and friction creates energy          always very Hard.........*Relationships                                                          *AnticipationLet the pursuit of Internal Boundaries do most of the" heavy lifting."          Relationship between You and You          Ability to make and keep promises to yourself         Self Discipline:         Time and event management         mental and emotional regulation         Impulse control

    The Soap Box: Shelia ( Lia ) Smith

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 6, 2023 28:02


     Let's Welcome Sbelia ( Lia) Smith to the Soap Box. Shelia is the Author and owner of the Red Cup Diaries Coaching Recovery and Support. She is an addiction support advocate, a sales and marketing specialist, and an economic justice advocate. Her Soap Box issues are :*Everyone should have the chance to Recover, regardless of status*Recovery is ongoing*Behavioral Change as a Recovery Option*Accountability   Her ( Shelia ) special projects are the Red Cup Diaries, the Building Mom project, and a new Business coaching app in production. LiaRuthSmith@gmail.comFavorite Color: RedFavorite Movie: The Princess BrideFavorite Food: Italian

    The Soap Box: Martin Lockett

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 18, 2023 36:16


    On the first episode of " The Soap Box," I interview Martin Lockett, a substance use counselor, author, and speaker, about his journey from incarceration to a national speaking tour and his mission of hope and practical advice to families of young adults in recovery.@MartinLockett MartinLockett.com

    Deception of Condition

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 20, 2023 10:06


    Regardless of how many people place any stigma upon you, the real problem is that you are one of them. To be deceived by your perception of your condition must be addressed immediately for what it is—a Deception of Condition. 

    Is It a Matter of Choice?

    Play Episode Listen Later May 31, 2023 11:43


    Is moving past an addiction a matter of choice? Finding myself on the less confident end of a debate with an experienced practitioner, I contemplated the ramifications of giving ground to the notion of choice versus compulsion and just what is the fundamental role of a professional helper.

    Need, Vulnerability, and Opportunity

    Play Episode Listen Later May 16, 2023 11:33


         In this episode, I wanted to expand on a great podcast I had the privilege of listening to. It is called Collateral Damage by Brandi Mac. She has an associated site called The Apathetic Journey. She has some interesting comments about the addiction industry and first-hand experiences caring for a loved one, and I couldn't help tossing in a few remarks of my own. 

    The Simple Science of Recovery

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 23, 2023 11:04


    Continuing to add straws will eventually break the camel's back. That's simple science. Persistent habits will help you reach the goal if you understand the 3 phases of mastering any task: the awkward, mechanical, and natural. 

    Become Your Attitude

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 19, 2023 7:09


    You are what you think and feel. Your attitude is who and what you bring to each obstacle. Once you determine the task, Assume the attitude and step into that alter ego. Insecurity and doubt fade away when you become the superhero of your story.

    Invest, Invest, Invest

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 11, 2023 7:51


    Time is money, time is peace of mind, and time is misery. Whatever you invest your time in, you will return more of what you invest. You invest all the time, and we need to be sure we are directing that effort in ways that enrich and empower us because you will get a return regardless of your intent, so choose wisely.

    Accept Yourself, Respect Yourself

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 5, 2023 7:41


    Take the first step in a long, lasting Recovery by learning to accept who you are. Without learning to accept who you are, you leave yourself open to the prison of trying to gain acceptance from others, which is often a trap and a prison. 

    Make Your Change Stick

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 29, 2023 9:34


    Creating change is easier than maintaining change. Working from purpose and a daily connection to your long-term Recovery is critical. Today we will discuss some straightforward but necessary steps to making your Recovery stick for the long haul.

    Practice until you can't get it wrong

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 28, 2023 8:39


    Dedication to the repetition of new habits leads to mastery. Mastering those new habits gives you flexibility and confidence in facing challenges. This strength is necessary to live by our goals and not our situation.

    Do you have a message?

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 25, 2023 6:44


         Most people finding themselves in a Recovery situation or needing a Major change in life are searching for a message. Are you sending the message you want to represent yourself or a default message that illustrates your pain instead of who you want to become and be? The truth is you are sending a message through your appearance, your actions, and your attitude.

    "Insight and Perspective" or "Why can't you see it my way?"

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 24, 2023 8:43


    Insight is the awareness and understanding of one's condition or situation. In a Recovery situation, there are conflicting views regarding ability and potential. How do we develop the trust to see it differently?

    Small Hinges Open Big Doors

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 22, 2023 6:35


    A Long term Recovery process can look like a huge closed door, but like all doors, they open with small hinges that make movement easier. The hinges needed to open big doors are a clear direction, specific and consistent habits, and grounded faith and persistence. 

    Organic Recovery

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 21, 2023 9:02


    An Organic Recovery system is an approach to Recovery that allows the body and mind's natural ability to heal and operate at full strength. Using these natural assets, we take all the other treatments and therapies to the highest level possible. 

    Where Do You Fit In?

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 20, 2023 8:00


    The odds are, if you find yourself in a recovery situation, you are still determining where you fit in. Like fitting a square peg into a round hole, Discomfort, the comparison game, and expectations cloud your ability to know and show how you fit in this world. Get a vision, break down limiting beliefs, and engage. Make your place.

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