This Week in Anguish

This week in anguish: - Misery loves company, so we are delighted to be joined by Canuck superfan, devoted listener, Vancouver expat, and Thunderbird grinder Alissa McArthur! - The Canucks have just concluded their third-best regular season of all time and were just one game away from the final four...so you better believe we devote significant time to talking about Troy from Richmond, Jacob from Gävle, and Nik from Moscow. - Tristan presents his cockamamie General Theory of Petey Bitterness, while Alissa drinks a bit more deeply from the cup of wisdom and sobers us again. - Hmm, important point of order: Do we actually even like playoff hockey? Won't somebody please think of the Quintin? - We're cool, we're calm, we're gonna be OK...just as long as we come up with the perfect local intro song to counterract our sometimes somnambulant starts.    Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.  

This week in anguish: - The first (and almost certainly last) mid-game episode of TWiA! Crow along vaingloriously with every Brock Boeser snipe! (Even those that turn out to actually be Elias Lindholm's.) Groan plosively with every indignity visited upon our beautiful boys! Strain to hear the off-mic musings of Racquel Rabey!  - Ardella is off to Scandihoovia for the next month and bit, so applications from any prospectively scabby co-hosts are welcomed.   Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.  

This week in anguish: - "Way to go boys! Never doubted you for a second," said your trusty co-hosts while hooked up to an IV drip due to perspiration-related dehydration. - When you move the goal-posts enough, everything becomes a three-pointer (Does that work as metaphor? Look, we barely even understand hockey.) - Tristan short-lists the best play-by-play calls of Pyoos Suter's series-winning goal. (Does that qualify as a pun? Probably not.)  - Time to better get to know more about the historic hardware we might be taking home this season, with our chief archivist reporting in on the Vezina, Adams, Norris, and Byng.    Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.  

This week in anguish: - Look, in the regular season these episode descriptions are mildly useful because you never know what vaguely Canuckian rabbit-hole we'll be crawling down to escape the indignities of the week that was, but in the playoffs? We do actually talk about the here and now, we promise. - That doesn't mean we won't still make time for an exposé on Richard Brodeur's 1982 save percentage and long-forgotten minutiae about Linden's glass-smashing hit. - Let us ape a little bit of Big Zee's sangfroid sass and go boldly together towards Game 5.   Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.   

This week in anguish: - PLAYOFFFFFFFFS!   Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.   

- You're a captain, Quintin, and don't let nobody tell ya different.  - Much like the Kübler-Ross stages of grief, the thoughts of your intrepid co-hosts are often misconstrued as being sequential. Can you tell we're getting a bit punchy up here on this playoff precipice? It's the podcast that aims for mildly amusing but has to settle for hysterical. - What should the Rogers Arena staff, our fellow fans, and society at large be doing and/or not doing at every single moment in time so as to not attract our ire and/or disdain? Find out all this and more in our even-keeled and good-natured review of our recent in-person entrapment at the hands of the LA Kings.    Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.   

This week in anguish: - What do we want?                  - Playoff glory or at least to know the particular nature of our ignominious defeat! - When do we want it?                 - Now! ( - Yes, we're having a bit of trouble enjoying the remainder of this regular season.) - What do Ilya Mikheyev, the Babych brothers, this other Babich, Belarussian bazas, and Percy Williams have in common? That's a question Ardella will be sure to answer just as soon as she's finished hand-tabulating the grimmest list on Olympedia.  - Tristan talks back to the radio. If you can throw a hat, you can throw a jersey. Yes, we are actually uniquely hard done by. And for heaven's sake: grow up, John Tortorella!    Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.       

This week in anguish: - Your favourite co-hosts Obstinate and Pliable demonstrate great resilienciness by poking their heads cautiously out of the slough to celebrate Petey's big payday. - We gird ourselves for the upcoming trade deadline by surveying the best last-minute impulse buys in Canuck history, which quickly reveals itself to be a history of best trade deadline deals in Pat Quinn history. - Who lacks all conviction in the postseason and who is full of passionate intensity? Mere anarchy is loosed upon the show as Tristan presents his definitive list of the Clutch vs. the Nahsomuch.  - The third Sedin and the third Courtnall should probably start a support group for tertiary brethren.  - Broken fourth wall update: Ardella and Rachel worked on a Trevor Linden jigsaw puzzle after recording, and Tristan('s goalie) won his beer league playoff game.    Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.    

This week in anguish: - "I went ballistic" - Ardella Thompson - Remember the Sandman? Sure you do. Remember "The Big C.S."? Liar.  - "Arshdeep, I'ma let you finish, but Andreas Martinsen had one of the South Asian NHL debuts of all time!"  - Thanks to Kuldip Bains and Brenton Demko for providing a rare dollop of good vibes.  - We excoriate ourselves for ever subscribing to the Team of Destiny newsletter, and then talk ourselves fifty percent of the way back onto the bandwagon.  Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.    

This week in anguish: - Mustering all the wisdom and sangfroid of her half-century of Canuck fandom, Ardella enters and sagely proclaims, "Pride goeth before the fa-...Hey! Get up, you bum! Are you kidding me!? Aaaaaagh!", flipping over a coaster, and stomping out of the room.  - Look, we remain cautiously optimistic for our seemingly singular swing at the mini-golf windmill, but this week brought back up a feeling or two.  - Shortly after pointing out his criminal brow shape, Tristan frames Noah Juulsen as a question.   - Ardella's Media Miscellany provides third-degree buzz marketing for Tanti Interiors Ltd and offers an excitingly unpaid voice acting opportunity to Daniel Wagner.     Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.    

This week in anguish: - A milestone half-marathon and a souvenir Covid bout kept us off the airwaves for much longer than intended, but you better believe we couldn't resist talking about...Petey being the best at passing the puck into some buckets or whatever. - Ardella welcomes Elias the Third with a bevy of fun facts. Did you know a zebulon is a term for a digression so severe that it sends one careening through the lists of most-popular Swedish baby names?  - The lamps of Kuzmenko's megawatt smile have gone out in Vancouver, and we shall not see them lit again in our lifetimes. Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn. We will remember them.  - Tristan's lays out the spread for a bric-à-brac picnic including Trevor's trees, Jyrki's groceries, BMo's law, JT and Co's jean jacket, Johnny's brevity, and of course Thatcher's hug snub.     Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.   

This week in anguish: - Tristan and Sistran get corporeal at Rogers Arena as the Canucks defeat the Senators in 18 minutes, leaving Tristan 42 minutes to look a gift wagon in the axle.  - Relative cheer volumes! Timbit timing! Actually accurate Adelaideans! And are we all Canucks, Wayne? Are we really? - Dive boldly, often baldly, and beer-gutted into halcyon summers with Howie Meeker's NHL Showdown.  - Annie get your G.O.A.T., we're kicking it into square one and firing up the etymology wagon.  - We blow it up and start all over again with the Honey Badger.    Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.    

This week in anguish: - The Hughes Bowl brought up, in addition to some hurt feelings for our primordinate son, the issue of strong mom genes. Exhibit A: the Jagrs, and the Jagrs with Cup. Exhibit B: the Hugheses. - We heard from Jim Rutherford for the first time in a long time. Ardella basks in the sweet sounds of regret, while Tristan would like Jim to re-check his Rolodex for monied Vancouver property developers with a vested interest in helping his hockey team. - Almost nearly totally passes without mention of one Roberto L.  - There's a new All-Star skills competition format and the rules, for one of our hosts, at least, are an intoxicating mixture of copious and frivolous.  - Our helmets are too dull (but may be on the precipice of being too shiny), our emboweled wine bar is at once too empty and too extant, and our yellow is all wrong. No, there is nothing we can't whinge about.   Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.    

This week in anguish:  - Various and sundry topics after a two-and-one week in which the wins felt pale and wan in comparison to coming up snake eyes against Vegas yet again.  - We head back to 1994 for a black-red-yellow song suggestion, and then stay there to bask in the hyper-local, Canuckian invention of Cameo 1.0 that was Rob's Stag. - We learn that Zadorov, like Petey before him, is a surprisingly dyed-in-the-wool Canucks fan. What would a team of all Canuckleheads look like?   - We look back to 2019 and chortle with Epimethean hindsight at the Hockey News' projection for this year's roster.     Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey. 

This week in anguish: - Tristan takes the reins, so prepare yourself for two things: We'll be covering a lot of ground, and we'll be tilling that good earth very, very lightly.  - Is Kuzy getting chilly in the doghouse? What's scarier than a silent Hög? How many Crawfords work for the Canucks? And ain't it just nice to hear that Trevor still cares? - The PWHL has no plan, but that's still leagues ahead of "plans" like the NHL's anti-sensical take on diversity, equity, and inclusion.    Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey. 

This week in anguish: - Bo Horvat and Ardella's DAWG rating goes stratospheric, while Tristan puts the old captain's tears under the microscope.  - Sometimes bitten, forever mauled, Ardella and Iain McIntyre lead us on a tour of the five players who were happiest to see the back of us, statistically speaking, at least. - The PWHL releases their jersey "designs" for their inaugural season, and they're spectacularly unimpressive. Sad Whale noises.  - Natalie Miller supports Hockey Helps the Homeless, and I just hope it doesn't ruffle too many feathers when I say I think that's swell.    Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey. 

This week in anguish: - Wound up with the title that it did, but was also very nearly called "Are We Actually the Best?" What can we say? Like most fans, we tend towards oscillation. - I'll see myself out. But not before sharing with you this Gen Z update of the famous leaning Linden photo.  - Ardella is away next week so no new pod for a fortnight, by which time nothing will have gone wrong and everyone will be happy.    Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.

This week in anguish: - Was, for the first few hours of its life, marred by audio issues which are now fixed. Delete and re-download if you're getting an echo.  - There's very little actual anguish to speak of! Tristan is basking in the blue-light glow of the NHL.com standings page and watching fluffy Canucks.com content, while Ardella is inventing monsters under the bed in the form of jersey-embedded micro-stats. - Frivolity levels have extended to the creation of charming Canucks gifs, from Brock and Petey being eternally but playfully withholding, Ian Cole's GOAT, and Beauvillier's jackal alter-ego.  - Don Taylor is being inducted, rightfully and at long last, into the BC Sports Hall of Fame. Now there's nothing left to do but mount the campaign to have Brett Hull and Duncan Keith unceremoniously booted from the BC Hockey Hall of Fame.  - Frank Frederickson, square-jawed scion of Icelando-Canadian ice hockey, and pioneer aviator who ran out of runway at the very end of this episode. Sorry, Frank!    Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.

This week in anguish: - Feels like its head is bobbing just above the surface of the great abyss. Better than the alternative. - A hearty welcome to the pod to anyone who had their Google alerts set for Dit Clapper, Erin Whitten, or the Bil(l)s Laforge, Esqs.  - Andrei Kuzmenko! Travis Dermott! Mariah Fujimagari! Mark Friedman! These are just some of the proper nouns you'll hear on this week's fabulous episode, proper nouns brought vividly to life by verbs! Verbs! Your friend in meaning.    Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.  

This week in anguish: - But no! This week in transitory triumph!  - We are both meaner and more succint in victory, apparently. Apologies to the family of Jay Woodcroft. But we wrapped up all the slander in under an hour! - Melt down the ice and dismantle the sun. Just freeze us in amber this week like a couple of  mammoth-sated mosquitoes.    Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.

This week in anguish: - Finds us surprisingly shaken by Stan Smyl finally falling from the full-time Canuck firmament.  Out of respect for Steamer's proverbial work ethic we take a tight and focused trip to the archives, barely even discussing the hourly rental cost of UBC arena icetime in 1982.  - The Position Player Portion of the Pod prances to its triumphal conclusion, going on the offence with Husky bulldog Aidan McDonough, piff paff puffing with Pius Suter, and rolling out the red linoleum for oft-unsung Tony Tanti.    Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.    

This week in anguish: - Senior Executive Host Ardella is firmly in the driver's seat this week, steering us deftly through many diversions and connections like checking in with a gone Sawyer, putting the "huh" back on the Hronek, and why the humble pride of the Church Athletic League was pleased as punch.  - Tristan puts in a workmanlike shift in the errors and omissions department, plucking the Nanaimo Clippers out of the tub when grasping for the name of a random WHL team, citing the sage words of "Dave Tocchet", and being at least a party to a conversation that referenced "Chris Tanev's draft class". - Do you suffer from diacritical marks? Have you been affected by male-pattern Balderis? Perhaps this segment, ostensibly about Teddy(s) Blueger(s), is right for you.    Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.

This week in anguish: - The pod spends a combined 15+ hours at Canucks training camp, working towards Ardella's stated goal of "just trying not to get attached to these people." - No one was left heaving in a Juolevian heap after any of the drills, heavily hampering our talent-evaluation process.  - We now have a huggable captain, an extant president, and a whisper on the wind about a practice facility.  - How Did We Not Know (and why on earth would you) about the former pride of the Rimouski Oceanic, Thatcher 1.0? - Prick up your ears on a continuing basis for the Position Player Portion fo the Pod, which shines the spotlight on goalies this week and consists of an up-and-comer (Tolopilo), a going concern (DeSmith), and a back-catalogue backstop (Gamble).    Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.    

This week in anguish: - We're back! And just in time to catalogue the Connecticut Whale (and the whole darn PHF) being reduced to oil and ambergris.  - Ardella carefully curates the most impactful happenings of each of the 14 weeks of our hiatus. - Tristan hangs up his prospect expert hat and returns to the pro scouting ranks. Hey, I hear this Troy from Richmond guy is supposed to be pretty good. - We grapple with a world in which the Vegas Golden Knights (and Ben Hutton) are your Stanley Cup champions, Connor Bedard is a Chicago Blackhawk, and Dale Tallon is a Senior Advisor to the putative good guys.    Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.  

This week in anguish: - While Ardella brings her usual homespun statistics and handscribed quotations, the show largely progresses along the lines scralwed out by Tristan in clumsy block letters on clipboarded sheets of looseleaf: CHEECH FILIP HRONEK / TRADE DEADLINE PRIDE CURRENT MANAGEMENT REGIME / PAST MANAGEMENT WEST COAST EXPRESS WHALE   Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.  

This week in Connecticut: - A definitive power ranking of PHF arenas! T-6th: International Skating Centre of Connecticut, home of your beloved Whale T-6th: Northtown Centre, home of the Buffalo Beauts 4th: Canlan Ice Sports York, home of the Toronto Six  3rd: The Rink at the American Dream Mall, home of the Metropolitan Riveters 2nd: Richfield Ice Arena, sunken 70s living room of the Minnesota Whitecaps 1st: Warrior Ice Arena, home of some schmucks from Massachusetts Vestigial 1st: Danbury Ice Arena, erstwhile Whale habitat - History! We review the Whale's tributary impersonation of the scrappy Pittsburgh Pennies.  - Fluff! We learn a li'l more about Janine Weber, Alyssa Wohlfeiler, Janka Hlinka, Kennedy Marchment, and others.  - Vengeance! One day after we recorded this during the Whale's 5-3 defeat to the Toronto Six, we stormed back and beat them 6-4.   Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.    

This week in anguish: - Ardella puts aside her pad of paper and turns show prep over to Tristan for this one, who comes armed with such fascinating and well-researched talking points as "Horvat: chant" and "Pettersson: clothes". - We're Google Translating Swiss newspaper articles to get to the bottom of why HC Visp is abandoning neutrality and Jake Virtanen all at once.  - How Did We Not Know that we've already had a player who rivalled Conor Bedard's eye-popping World Juniors statistics?   Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.  

This "week" in anguish: - We struggle to fathom how we got down into this trough, and yet we remember every damn step along the way. - Taps urgently on our tattered "There's no salary cap on respect" sign. - Misses and appreciates Gino Odjick, and will continue to do so forever. - Comes distressingly close to agreeing with Andrew Walker on something. - Rolls out the anguished carpet for Rick Tocchet. Huzzah.  - Sighs along with John Garrett, and wishes our team could do a better job of embodying John Shorthouse's 2023 resolution.    Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.  

This "week" in anguish: - Comes out almost utterly at random now. Much like our beloved squadron, everything is meaningless and there is a distinct lack of accountability.  - With that in mind, it's all ventilated spleens and strangely strenuous ennui for the first 45 minutes or so. - But you'll learn something! Connor Bedard numerology and a curious history of exceptional status, at the very least.  - The tears in rain fall shortly after Connecticut. These whales are not nice, while this whale is. Pucky/ie, "the whale who likes hockey", is unfortunately lecherous.  - Just because it deserves to be put in print, Ardella on JT Miller: "He doesn't have the confidence to be humble."      Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.        

This week in anguish: - Was recorded shortly before Elias went supernova against the Kraken. We woulda mentioned it, I promise! - Is really just a collection of troubling bullet points from the last month-ish, including such lowlights as... - Our briefly shiny, now tarnished front office and our human rights tribunalations. - How Allvin and Rutherford really, really need to block After Hours' phone number. - The fact that there are no signs of light, even compared to end-stage Benningism. - The treatment of Bo, Brock, Nils, and others. - Our utter lack of internal salary cap structure. - Our checked-out coach. - Wait, you guys are having fun!? - But all is not lost! The farm is actually looking a bit fecund for once, and Jeremy Colliton is Sweder than we ever realized.   Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.  

This week in anguish: - Once again, we've convinced ourselves what a great idea it would be to quarter-watch a muted hockey game while attempting to simultaneously podcast. - The cohesion suffers! Ah well, a good time is had by all (two of us), and we learn a great deal about Swedish 'Nucks, savour some sterling Läck stats, and we add a new chapter to Garrett's Big Book of Pings.    Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.  

This week in anguish: - Seems to dare Jim Rutherford to fire it, so flippantly does it thumb its nose at the very concept of structure. - A roadtrip of comparisons has stolen Tristan's joy, but never fear! The last nine seasons of futility have almost fully numbed his frayed nerves.  - In a fit of November Neurosis, Ardella has dehumanizingly bracketed every one of the Canucks' 48 contracts, pitting them against each other in a hunch-based, cap-free battle royale. Tristan immediately proceeds to draft the makings of a team that would get likeably trounced by its own castoffs. - The ballet-inspired Soviet coach Tristan was thinking of was Anatoly Tarasov. His dictatorial successor was indeed Viktor Tikhonov, but it was Vsevolod Bobrov who coached the Soviet team at the '72 Summit. Vsevolod!    Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.  

This week in anguish: - Is one of those weeks that's probably better summed up by all the potential episode titles we discarded in the first 15 minutes. - Any element of mawk-ness has totally disappeared. - There's no ray of light. - We're below the rock that is rock bottom. - If we weren't the laughing stock of the country and of the world... (This one just kind of trails off.)  - We get things on the rails for a highly structured, straightforward back-60 minutes. That's how you win in this league, after all.    Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.  

This week in anguish: - Was recorded as we watched the Canucks deflate/implode against the Nashville Predators, after each period. We maintained a super even emotional keel throughout, though - no worries. - Is essentially the KevinCast, as Juice, ironically, gave us a great deal to chew over.  - The Whale took it on the fin in their first foray back against the sinful Pride. At least we have Lenka Serdar's...creature (?) to console us.   - We leave Shorty behind in this week's Tears in Rain to unleash Mean John Garrett. - Ardella's tone-of-voice power rankings, exposed.  - Switchy-swap sweaters. Everyone's talking about them. But we cut to the chase. This Johnny can skate. This Johnny can't. Be better, Johnny.  - Where do Canucks come from, mostly?   Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey. 

This week in anguish: - We bask in the glow of, at long last, a good li'l 48 hours for our beleaguered team.  - We don't let go of old grievances, though! We take Patrick Allvin out behind the pumpkin patch for a talking to.  - More tears are spilled in rain than are captured. That's an assessment of this week's segment, but also probably a fun fact.  - Were we even slightly on the ball, we would have made much more of Mikheyev's breakout week and Spencer Martin's sterling job maintaining his perfect points percentage. Here's John Garrett chagrining at our lack of professionalism, instead.  - This Week in Connecticut sees our habitat endangered, our pod much changed but seemingly improved, and finds us a bit confused about how to do this season's whale watching.   Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey. 

This week in anguish: - Was the worst single week in Canucks history.(?) Ardella's voice raises at the end of that sentence. Tristan's does not. You decide.  - We lose our damn minds temporarily before we even make it to the nine-minute mark.  - Jim  ̷B̷e̷ Rutherford went on After Hours and that gave us (and Bruce Boudreau) a whooole lot to think about. - Ardella lightens the mood by sewering Elias Pettersson's early campaign. He's almost as bad as JT, folks! - We ask the big questions about the Power Rising video, such as, "What?" - Determined not to let all those wonderful little John and John moments get lost in time, Tristan unveils his new segment, Tears in Rain. - Doubling down, Ardella turns to the financial statements of Hockey Canada to cheer herself up (but like, actually) in this week's How Did I Not Know That? Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey. 

This week in anguish: - Swaddled in ignorance of Saturday's result, we spend a great deal of time bewailing game one. - It's not like we're going to give up a multi-goal lead and allow another shorthanded goal against in the very next game, right? Right!? - Not to worry, though. We sort out Bedard to the Canucks by 2025, max. - Ardella has questions, Tristan adopts a power-play, and Whales are spotted on the horizon.    Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.   

This week in anguish: - We begin season five (!) with a whole new ethos: no prep. - We swoon for Kuzmenko, stump for Bo, mull over Miller and manage to fall a little bit more in love with our beloved Bruce. - Despite (and, to be honest, preceding) all these fuzzy feelings, we still find a tremendous amount to be anxious about! Damn the gods for putting the season of Brock in peril. Why is there such a burgeoning middle in the GM Jim venn diagram? Whither Ms. Doerrie and wherefore Mr. Tallon? We gnash our teeth.    Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.   

This week in anguish: - 51 years of season-summating headlines, handily hi-lited for your edification.  - A last fond look back at our bygone betters, the boys of 2002. - Talking over the year-end media availabilities, but really just lamenting our inability to give Brock a hug.  - A whistlestop tour of Transcarpathian ethnicities, featuring all your favourite Horvats.  - How Did We Not Know that Dale Tallon pulverized baby Bobby back in the day? Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey. 

This week in anguish: - Ever keen to emulate his NHL heroes, Tristan decided to try out this fun new Covid protocol he'd been hearing so much about. - This meant we hadn't recorded in two semi-meaningful weeks, leading to this episode having a pretty prodigious conversational PSI. - You know how people complain about coaches ruining the game with too much structure? Think of this episode as a protest against that. We freewheel for an hour and forty. Firewagon podcasting...is that a thing?   Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey. 

This week in anguish: - Breaking down all of Bouce Broudeau's win-the-weeks. - "Hope, persusade, whatever," and other inspirational advice for Patrik Allvin. - Beating the Maple Leafs at franchise records we have carefully hand-selected. - Checking in on the miraculous regular season finish of the 2001/02 Canucks. - Spencer Martin and our expensive goalie severance packages. - Chase Gray saves the orca and the Canucks embarrass themselves with their "offers" to indigenous artists. - How Did I Not Know about Markus Naslund and Peter Forsberg's charitable superteam? - Tristan describes things he saw in Canucks mic'd up videos. What to see Weekend at Petey's for yourself? How about gurning Bo Horvat?    Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey. 

This week in anguish: - Is a Frankenstein's miracle of audio stitchery after one of us had issues with their recording. (It was Tristan. It's always Tristan.) If it seems like some sentences end a bit before they should - We cemented our eternal Connecticut Whale credentials in truly Canuckticut fashion by losing a heartbreaking, do-or-die final game to a bunch of jerks from Boston. - Ardella has quizzes! First: ranking the many Marches of the post-2011 Canucks. Who you got? Travis 3? Willie 1? All your favourites are here. - Then: forget March Madness and make way for March Melancholia. Gasp with delight as the Sad Sixteen are whittled down to the Oful Ocho before the Forlorn Four give way to the Troubled Two. Only one will stand as your Cheerless Champion of the sixteen discouraging things that happened this March off the top of Ardella's head! - We take stock of the two sad times we tried and failed to turn ourselves into the team that beat us, the first time as tragedy, the second as farce. - The true inventors of the hockey stick, the greatest Canucks win of all time, and Ardella gets belted by one small difference between beer league and the bigs.   Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.         

This week in anguish: - It finally hits us that the homestand, this season, and maybe even this core are in danger of dying with a whimper. - Like a stone plooshing into a pond, this realization ripples out into three wavefronts of worry, each one more sacrilegious than the last. - We say goodbye to Tyler, tally the Travises, and tie our hopes, once again, around Troy. - Like light from a dying star slowly reaching the earth, this week's lackadaisacal editing schedule puts Tristan in the awkward position of sewering Halak at his moment of greatest Canuck trimph. - Ardella reads over a hundred pages of graduate-level research on the hockey organ. Diapasons of laughter ensue. Charge! - Whale win! Whale win! Your 2022 PHF regular season champion Connecticut Whale are sharpening their baleen while they await the identiy of their first Isobel Cup opponent.   Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey. 

This week in anguish: - Unimaginably, the Canucks (and Brad Hunt) have won yet another week. - Do you know who Nils is, Bruce? Tread carefully. - JT Miller rockets up the body language power rankings. - The paltry archaeological evidence of Dancing Demko. - The Canucks' new Pride jersey, more comments on the Black History Month jersey, and a plea for 41 jerseys a year. - Claude Vilgrain played 145 non-Olympic international games for Team Canada from 1986-1988. How? Huh? Against whom? And other queries resolved. - David Bauer's principles lose Canada the 1964 silver medal. - This Week in Connecticut revels in past dominance and anticipates a consequential showdown. - The First Invitational Sesquicentennial Canucks Games-Played Quiz.   Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey. 

This week in anguish: - Winning the week while protecting Christopher Tanev's face and Jacob Markström's pride (and ignoring the ongoing descent to hell in New Jersey) - Ardella slyly coins a wonderful phrase. "At one point there was a scrumble in front of the goalie." Delightful. - Old Man Jannik and the case of the plastic shells. - We talk Black History Month in various forms, including appreciating the Canucks' newest jersey design, going ghost-hunting through Madison Bowie's article, and naming the also-rans in Justin Bailey's chronicle of Black Cancucks.  - Nat Bailey's ultimately unsuccessful efforts to torpedo Ernie Dougherty's career. - Slap Shot is 45 years old and there is a great deal we still dont' understand.  - Prospect potpourri, including Aidan McDonagh and a plague of Huskies, Gunnarwolfe Fontaine's admission to the all-name team, Klimovich's journey from Pinsk to Minsk, and Lucas Forsell's animorphosis.    Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey. 

This week in anguish: - Olympic revelry turns quickly into a search for the Canucks' new (or additional?) mental performance coach. - The Canucks' front office is more available than ever, and we extract insights. Among the most superficial and tangential: Patrick Allvin is the future of ASMR, and Carey Price had the most horrific ears mask of all time.  - The view from Section 307 as the boys Eeyore themselves to the brink of playoff irrelevance.  - Boudreau (sorry, "Bruce") questions the team's readiness, and after a detour through Michael Jordan's towel-centric process we're poachin' coaches and tip-toeing across Jannik Hansen's lawn. - Ardella is becoming radicalized online and Tristan wishes that he could cut as sharply up the ice as a Tohoku Free Blade.    Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey. 

This week in anguish: - Despite winning the week, we fear we are living in the twilight of the idols. We love our new management group and their putative vision, but who will be the first to go once Jim starts to philosophize with a hammer? - Perhaps, if we all just close our eyes and misunderstand Bayern Munich's slogan hard enough, we can all stay as one big happy family after all.  - Welcome Cammi Granato! You have risen to great hockey heights while reflexively batting off prejudiced attacks for over 20 years...but can you withstand our withering critique of your slapdash workflow as a children's author? - Yo Juho, I'm really happy for you, and I'ma let you finish, but the Canucks already had one of the best player-of-the-game objects of all time. One of the best of all time! - If the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over again and expecting different results, surely our plan to once again draft Elias Petterson in 2022 is flawless.    Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.     

This week in anguish: - Podz and Högs both get a night in or around the pressbox, and in the latter case we strain to avoid using the term "pork scratchings". - Tallying Bruce's winning weeks. - Huge Hughes news, and a rare point of controversy as we debate player travel during the All-Star break. - Like so many others, we unhinge our jaws and stare agape at just how badly Rocky Wirtz and Gary Bettman are handling life, the universe, and everything. - Passing notions and superficial observations on 50 years of Canuck all-stardom. - Remember the Challenge Cup in 1979? Or Rendez-Vous '87? Wanna? - How to build a cohesive dressing room in two easy steps (and one easy steppe).   Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.   

This week in anguish: - Is going description-less for the time being as I'm uploading it eight seconds before having to go to work. - Give it a listen! All shall be revealed. 

This week in anguish: - The boys pulled off a successful-on-our-terms road trip and a tremendously gutsy overtime loss to the Panthers, with Petey looking more and more like himself...so we focus on Petey's less-than-stellar shootout attempt, and move-less attempts in general. - We welcome Rachel Doerrie to the fold with our patended mixture of over-familiarity, hyper-scrutiny, and the belief that quotes should never be burdened down by pesky context. - A journey into the rabbit hole of Ardella's mind, beginning at Ulf Samuelsson and ending with Jesse Boulerice face-sticking Ryan Kesler.  - Like buzzards we pick over the verbal remains of Chris Gear and Nolan Baumgartner in the search for nourishing morsels.  - The pod has a Pod, the PHF has more cash, the jerseys have more pride, the ECHL all star game has more representation, but most importantly of all... - What's wrong with Lumme?    Thanks for listening! This episode supports the Hockey4Youth foundation and HerosHockey.

This week in anguish: - Begins with twenty-five minutes of handwringing over the state of our Petey. Basically, we fret-manifested his scoring outburst later that morning, no big deal. - Breaking down our goal expectations and making sure the Boudreau bounce doesn't descend into a Desjardins dribble.   - "This town ain't big enough for the both of us," said Probity to Competitive Advantage.  - Why did there used to be two professional North American women's hockey leagues? Why is there now only one league and one "player's association"? Are we the baddies? A report.  - Between the time it took to record and publish this, the PHF has announced their salary cap will more than double next season. This podcast is now basically a vision board.