Qualified Nonsense

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Qualified Nonsense is an advice podcast wherein lifelong friends aim to provide advice using their life experiences and insight in a fun and judgement-free way. The purpose of the podcast is for the hosts to build stronger relationships with each other a

Qualified Nonsense

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    • Nov 11, 2024 LATEST EPISODE
    • infrequent NEW EPISODES
    • 54m AVG DURATION
    • 70 EPISODES


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    Latest episodes from Qualified Nonsense

    Aaaaaand we're back!

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 11, 2024 68:39


    That's right folks. The friends you know and love are back at it again. Join Brandon, Matt, and Jake as they catch up about education, New Orleans, and beer.The intrepid trio face off against the wild world of Reddit and pontificate on the most intriguing subreddit questions and comments like "What kind of sandwich are you?" and "Landlord Retaliation Fantasies" and even "The modern male social anxiety".Send any questions or comments to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Requiem for a Podcast

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 13, 2023 74:12


    Folks, this is it! This is our last episode (for now) that was recorded live on 12/10/23 and can still be viewed at youtube.com/@qualifiednonsense. In this one, we talk about the reasons for starting a podcast, Jake helping with moving, the Christmas Train in Yacolt, WA, Christmas traditions, things that would be on a Qualified Nonsense Bingo card, where we see ourselves in 2 years, New Years resolutions, lessons we've learned from the podcast, and more!Send any questions or comments to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Unsolicited Advice & More Existential Dread

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 6, 2023 70:49


    ANNOUNCEMENT! Join us Sunday, December 10, 2023 at 10:00pm EST/7pm PST for a live recording of our FINAL episode! Tune in at twitch.tv/qualifiednonsense or YouTube.com/@QualifiedNonsense and bring your questions!On this week's show, we cover our plans for survival, what it means to live a finite life in an infinite universe, our own life pro tips, goats, the myth of the alpha in nature, pub trivia, 'Godzilla Minus One', 'Violent Night', time zones, and more!Send any questions or comments to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    The Good, The Bad, & The Out of Body

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 29, 2023 63:21


    This week, we make a big announcement about the future of the show you'll want to hear! Plus, we talk about the best and worst meals we've ever cooked, out of body experiences, things that sound better than they actually are, 69, Jake's son's birthday party, Thanksgiving, cranberries, and more!Send any questions or comments to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    It's a Living & Black Friday

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 22, 2023 54:06


    In this episode, we talk about things we like best and least about our current jobs, Black Friday plans, things we became fans of late in life, port wine, Matt's Hawaii trip, homebrewing, an unfortunate incident while Jake was hiking, first aid/CPR, adult toys, and more!Send any questions or comments to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Give Us the Business & Breakfast Favorites

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 8, 2023 59:18


    This week's episode is Matt-less, so Brandon and Jake discuss: businesses we would like to open, our favorite breakfasts, Halloween activities, hack comedy, restaurants, German food, high school era Denny's shenanigans, and more!Please consider becoming a Patron to help out the show and to start getting bonus content at just $5 a month: patreon.com/QualifiedNonsenseSend any questions or comments to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.comHide

    Pre-Planning a Midlife Crisis & Bath Time

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 1, 2023 47:35


    On this week's show, we discuss how we use soap, the first dates with our spouses, our ideal midlife crises, pumpkin carving, pumpkin seeds, Eddie Izzard, Brandon's Arizona trip, moving to different locations, and more!Please consider becoming a Patron to help out the show and to start getting bonus content at just $5 a month: patreon.com/QualifiedNonsenseSend any questions or comments to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    The Second Annual Halloween Sheet-Show

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 25, 2023 52:44


    Bugs and kisses, dear listener! Come boo-gie down with us for this spooky skele-bration! Let us tickle your funny bone this week by discussing such topics as: our favorite and least favorite Halloween candies, Marry/F*ck/Kill (Monster Edition!), places that give us an eerie feeling, Halloween plans with kids, things that scare kids, effective scary movies, and more!Please consider becoming a Patron to help out the show and to start getting bonus content at just $5 a month: patreon.com/QualifiedNonsenseSend any questions or comments to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Men of 1,000 Voices & Amazon Order Histories

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 18, 2023 45:57


    On this episode, we try to do our best celebrity impressions, reveal our Amazon order history, discuss skills we wish we had, and talk about things like 'No One Will Save You', 'Sex Education', 'The Great British Bakeoff', 'Whalefall' by Daniel Kraus, long running TV shows, and more!Please consider becoming a Patron to help out the show and to start getting bonus content at just $5 a month: patreon.com/QualifiedNonsenseSend any questions or comments to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    50 Worst Dates & Getting Called Out

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 11, 2023 43:05


    This week, we cover our worst first dates, being called out for offending someone, things we would want to farm, C'est Si Bon! in Portland, Jake attending another wedding, Brandon getting a COVID/flu shot, walnuts, our favorite nuts, Carolina reaper peppers, and more!Please consider becoming a Patron to help out the show and to start getting bonus content at just $5 a month: patreon.com/QualifiedNonsenseSend any questions or comments to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    All The Leaves Are Brown & Chasing Dreams

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 4, 2023 47:01


    In this episode we cover dreams we would drop everything for to pursue, the latest we have stayed out recently, what we know enough about to teach, foods we're looking forward to for fall, fall weather, pumpkins, pumpkin pie, homebrewed beer vs commercial beer, and more!Please consider becoming a Patron to help out the show and to start getting bonus content at just $5 a month: patreon.com/QualifiedNonsenseSend any questions or comments to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Pitch Fest & Evolving Views

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 27, 2023 62:16


    On this week's show, we cover how high and low our voices can go, things we have changed our views on, places we don't want to vacation, Oktoberfest, mattresses, a Beyonce concert, mailbox shenanigans, and more!Please consider becoming a Patron to help out the show and to start getting bonus content at just $5 a month: patreon.com/QualifiedNonsenseSend any questions or comments to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Prince Albert For Sale & On the Lam

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 20, 2023 64:43


    In this week's show, we cover how we would hide out as fugitives, revisiting and reevaluating media from our pasts, Prince Albert piercings and how much we'd need to be paid for various piercings and tattoos, stress dreams, wedding attendance, a smash burger pop up, winning money at video lottery, and more!Please consider becoming a Patron to help out the show and to start getting bonus content at just $5 a month: patreon.com/QualifiedNonsenseSend any questions or comments to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Burning Man or Bust & Buyer's Remorse

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 13, 2023 59:42


    On this week's episode, we cover attending festivals, purchases we've regretted/been happy with, jobs we would take in a wealthy estate, photography, the Intercoastal Waterway in NC, fishing, Oktoberfest marzen, Lindsey Stirling, wine/wine glasses, mattresses, Urdaneta in Portland, and more!Please consider becoming a Patron to help out the show and to start getting bonus content at just $5 a month: patreon.com/QualifiedNonsenseSend any questions or comments to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Everyone Is Stupid Except Me & Seasonal Cocktails

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 6, 2023 59:35


    This week's show covers topics such as: our favorite live performances, our favorite cocktails for each season, things that annoy us more than usual, a shooting at Jake's workplace, 'Poker Face', Can Can Cabaret in Seattle, The Gipsy Kings, and more!Please consider becoming a Patron to help out the show and to start getting bonus content at just $5 a month: patreon.com/QualifiedNonsenseSend any questions or comments to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Nervous Diarrhea & Other Toxic Traits

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 30, 2023 69:45


    This is a recording our first ever live show, recorded Sunday August 27 and broadcasted live on YouTube and Twitch! You can find the video version of this podcast now at youtube.com/qualifiednonsense. Please consider becoming a Patron to help out the show and to start getting bonus content at just $5 a month: patreon.com/QualifiedNonsenseSend any questions or comments to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Scammers Gonna Scam & Living in a Video Game

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 23, 2023 46:37


    In this episode, we talk about getting scammed, whether we'd want to be trapped in a video game or live a video game in the real world, luxuries we are willing to pay for, things we are unwilling to pay for, LSD/psychedelics, mushrooms, fungus, and more!Please consider becoming a Patron to help out the show and to start getting bonus content at just $5 a month: patreon.com/QualifiedNonsenseSend any questions or comments to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Dudes Talking Foods

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 16, 2023 61:08


    This week on the pod, we talk about vegetarianism/veganism, the final meals we'd eat on death row, pasta and noodles, Jake's phone's algorithm, internet ads, Hard and soft Mountain Dew, the North Carolina Zoo, the ethics of zoos, 'Meg 2', and more!We've got a LIVE SHOW on the way! Tune in on Sunday August 27 at 9pm EST/6pm PST to watch us live and to interact with us during the show. Catch us at twitch.tv/qualifiednonsense and on our YouTube page at: youtube.com/@QualifiedNonsense. We can't wait to see you there!Please consider becoming a Patron to help out the show and to start getting bonus content at just $5 a month: patreon.com/QualifiedNonsenseSend any questions or comments to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Modern Fart Masterpiece & Java Junkies

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 9, 2023 67:47


    On this week's show, we talk about our thoughts on modern art, the most embarrassing phase of our lives, our coffee preferences, Thai food spice levels, Jake and Matt's kids' back-to-school, theater camp, kids dressing themselves, learning chores, Fern Ridge Lake, sailing, 'Isle of Dogs', Wes Anderson, grocery stores, and more!We've got a LIVE SHOW on the way! Tune in on Sunday August 27 at 9pm EST/6pm PST to watch us live and to interact with us during the show. Catch us at twitch.tv/qualifiednonsense and on our YouTube page at: youtube.com/@QualifiedNonsense. We can't wait to see you there!Please consider becoming a Patron to help out the show and to start getting bonus content at just $5 a month: patreon.com/QualifiedNonsenseSend any questions or comments to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Close Encounters of the Nerd Kind

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 2, 2023 67:05


    This week, we talk about recent UFO revelations, reincarnation, sports we would excel at currently, drag racing, Chicago, flying first class, Jake's work life, and more!Please consider becoming a Patron to help out the show and to start getting bonus content at just $5 a month: patreon.com/QualifiedNonsensePlease send any questions or comments to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Fun & Flirty at 50

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 26, 2023 55:10


    We've reached the dubious milestone of 50 episodes! On this week's program, we talk about Prime Day, Matt's new pool, physical media, digital advertising, Jake's neighbor's pool, state fairs, 'How to Sell a Haunted House' by Grady Hendrix, flag burning, peeing in the shower and in pools, musical genres we would want to be famous for, and more!Please consider becoming a Patron to help out the show and to start getting bonus content at just $5 a month: patreon.com/QualifiedNonsensePlease send any questions or comments to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Bald is Beautiful & A Hill to Die On

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 19, 2023 57:30


    On this week's show, we talk about Jake's getting accustomed to his new job, Brandon's 3rd wedding anniversary, shaving our heads, our feelings about cruises, whether we would rather die on a mountain or going cave diving, intrusive thoughts, what we like to cook to impress people, and more!Please consider becoming a Patron to help out the show and to start getting bonus content at just $5 a month: patreon.com/QualifiedNonsensePlease send any questions or comments to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Rubbing Our Lamps for Fun & Ramblin' Rod

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 12, 2023 58:30


    In this episode, we talk about Jake's new job, boating, Jason Isbell, mattresses, local commercials, Ramblin' Rod, Rogaine, tattoos, things we enjoy that others don't, DIY furniture, 3 wishes we would ask a genie for, and more!Please consider becoming a Patron to help out the show and to start getting bonus content at just $5 a month: patreon.com/QualifiedNonsensePlease send any questions or comments to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Smoke 'Em If You Got 'Em & Tactile Fun

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 5, 2023 48:15


    CHECK OUT OUR NEW PATREON AND CONSIDER BECOMING A PATRON: patreon.com/QualifiedNonsenseDue to last week's issues with Matt's internet, he is absent from this episode, but Jake and Brandon manage to hold things down. This week, we talk about tactile activites we enjoy, movie/TV quotes we use in daily life, pub trivia, book reviewing, 'Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny', Jake's new job orientation, 4th of July plans, our thoughts on fireworks, woodworking, bees, Lego, and more!Please send any questions or comments to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Take Me Down to the Very Last City & Pumping Iron

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 28, 2023 38:29


    CHECK OUT OUR NEW PATREON AND CONSIDER BECOMING A PATRON: patreon.com/QualifiedNonsenseFirst off, we apologize for a technical issue late in the episode. We lost Matt's audio for the last 15 minutes or so of the episode, so it is a little shorter than normal. In the episode, we talk about tie dyeing, Jake's new job, painting, homebrewing, 'Asteroid City', IMAX, 'Severance', phrases we have learned we were using incorrectly, our favorite exercises, foods we'd bring to a BBQ, and more!Please send any questions or comments to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    The Truth is Out There & Breakfast of Champions

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 21, 2023 71:35


    CHECK OUT OUR NEW PATREON AND CONSIDER BECOMING A PATRON: patreon.com/QualifiedNonsenseIn this episode, we take on a new format by talking about things we can do as adults that we couldn't as children, UFOs, aliens, the universe, what we make for breakfast, homebrewing, the Flemish language, edibles, and more!Please send any questions or comments to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Kids Say the Darndest $#!% & Pick Up Artists Everywhere

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 14, 2023 46:13


    CHECK OUT OUR NEW PATREON AND CONSIDER BECOMING A PATRON: patreon.com/QualifiedNonsenseThis week, we talk about our thoughts on kids swearing and swearing in general, a listener encountering frequent harassment in public, if we would make good spies, our favorite childhood video games, to kill or not to kill bugs, and more!Things we've consumed that were discussed in the episode:Foster's Key Lime Pie in Durham, NC (Jake)Ringo Starr & His All Starr Band (Brandon)Hexclad Pans (Matt)Please send any questions or comments to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening! Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Smokers Are Jokers & Fear of Flying

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 7, 2023 49:23


    This week, we talk about tips for quitting smoking, tackling a fear of flying, types of noodles, if we'd rather be in jail or a coma, our favorite quotes, whether we'd like a long boring life or short and exciting one, and more!Things we've consumed that were discussed in the episode:TikTok Chef Jesse Jenkins AKA @adip_food (Jake)Tumwater Vineyard (Matt)Dice Stack (Brandon)Please send your advice questions to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening! Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Don't Open a Restaurant & Summer Vacation

    Play Episode Listen Later May 31, 2023 54:29


    This episode is posting on Matt's birthday, so HBD, Matt! In this week's show, we talk about the pros and cons of opening your own restaurant, summer vacation ideas for a teacher, humanity's worst quality, whether we'd rather lose our sight or our memories, things that give us hope for the future, and more!Things we've consumed that were discussed in the episode:Knife sharpening (Jake)'Women' by Charles Bukowski (Brandon)2023 Premier Sunsation pontoon boat (Matt)Please send your advice questions to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening! Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Death Stalks You at Every Turn & Boring Coworkers

    Play Episode Listen Later May 24, 2023 45:20


    This week, we discuss near-death experiences and whether we felt changed after them, dealing with boring coworkers, morning vs evening showers, condiments, lessons learned from our parents, and more! Things we've consumed that were discussed in the episode:'Bake Off: The Professionals' (Jake)Hot Mustard Doritos (Matt)Hendricks Park Rhododendron Garden in Eugene, OR (Brandon)Please send your advice questions to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening! Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: Ace, Sound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    How to Get Your Groove Back & Rise of the Machines

    Play Episode Listen Later May 17, 2023 59:28


    In this episode, we cover the challenges associated with artificial intelligence in the workplace, rekindling the spark in a busy marriage, our bucket list vacations, which thing we would want unlimited supplies of, which language we would learn in a week, and more! Things we've consumed that were discussed in the episode:Shin Ramen (Jake)Turquoise ring from Antiques & Art on Main in Pendleton, OR (Matt)Dracula Daily (Brandon)Please send your advice questions to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening! Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcast Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon Bernhardt Music: Ace Sound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Cancel Me, Bro & Undesirable Climates

    Play Episode Listen Later May 10, 2023 73:24


    In this week's show, we cover what would need to happen in order for us to move to an undesirable location, our thoughts on cancel culture, 'Labyrinth', tall clothing, our recent search histories, planning pranks, celebrity deaths, and more! Things we've consumed that were discussed in the episode:Wingspan board game (Jake)True Classic t-shirts (Matt)'Barry' (Brandon)'John Wick' (Brandon)Please send your advice questions to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening! Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcast Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon Bernhardt Music: Ace Sound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Getting Familiar with Familiars & Family Pets

    Play Episode Listen Later May 3, 2023 59:19


    Apologies in advance for the audio issues in this episode. We had some internet delays which caused some of the audio to lag, so please bear with us. In this week's show, we cover the concept of a familiar and tasks we would give our familiars, types of pets that are best for families, black and white film, the fastest way to our hearts, things we wish we liked more, fresh vs fried food, and more!Things we've consumed that were discussed in the episode:Learn.Microsoft.com (Jake)Blink-182 at Coachella (Matt)'Nights of Cabiria' (Brandon)Please send your advice questions to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Our Favorite Murders & Advice for Our Younger Selves

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 26, 2023 68:25


    In this episode, we cover advice we'd give our younger selves, our favorite crimes and conspiracies, our favorite vices, favorite summer pastimes, things we wish we were proficient at, getting railed in a sundress, and more!Things we've consumed that were discussed in the episode:French Yogurt Cake (Jake)Feit Electric Light Bulbs (Matt)'Post Office' by Charles Bukowski (Brandon)Please send in an advice question to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastHosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    OnlyFans Heartaches & Staying Organized

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 19, 2023 48:47


    This week, we discuss: a spouse discovering an old OnlyFans account, how we stay organized, fear of flying, which Disney character we identify with, wiping etiquette, summers vs winters, and more!Things we've consumed that were discussed in the episode:Saltbox Seafood Joint (Jake)North Carolina Travels (Matt)H-Mart (Matt)Suspenders (Brandon)Please send in an advice question to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Socials:Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsenseTwitter: @QNPodcastThank you to our sponsor: A-WOL Dance Collective! Check out awoldance.org for more information and tickets to their upcoming performance of Yellow Brick Road, April 21-23, 2023.Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Office Bullies & Midlife Reflections

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 12, 2023 60:27


    In this episode, we cover: how to deal with an office bully, reflections accomplishments when approaching midlife, if we've ever been in fights, camping vs glamping, tapas or pasta, anagrams, March Madness, and more!Things we've consumed discussed in the episode:Thee Lakesiders (Jake)'Creepshow' Graphic Novel (Brandon)March Madness bracket (Matt)Please send in an advice question to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Thank you to our sponsor: A-WOL Dance Collective! Check out awoldance.org for more information and tickets to their upcoming performance of Yellow Brick Road, April 21-23, 2023.Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    The Naked Truth & Life After High School

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 5, 2023 60:09


    This week, we discuss: nudity and why there are so many hang ups surrounding it, reflections on personal growth since high school, judging others based on your conception of them in the past, if there's an afterlife, personal taboos, what we wanted to be after high school, and more!Things we've consumed discussed in the episode:Drinks by the Dram (Jake)Hari Kondabolu stand-up (Brandon)'Purple Rain' (Matt)Please send in an advice question to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Three Podcasters Walk Into a Bar...

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 29, 2023 55:12


    WARNING: This episode gets quite blue. Listener discretion is advised as we discuss: jokes (both the clean, dirty, and filthy kind), accidents and injuries, our first jobs, people we would trade places with, things that make us happy and more! Things we've consumed discussed in the episode:Vinyl Vehicle Wraps (Matt)'9 to 5: The Musical' (Brandon)'Newsies' (Jake)Museum of Life & Science in Durham, NC (Jake)Please send in an advice question to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Bad Baby Names & Limiting Screen Time

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 22, 2023 66:32


    In this episode, we discuss: ways to limit screentime for yourself, things NOT to name your new baby, some funny real-world names, which animal we would be, hot tubs vs saunas vs cold plunges, the things we think about before going to sleep, and more! Things we've consumed discussed in the episode:Dashi Ramen (Jake)'Lockwood & Co.' (Jake)'I Vitelloni' (Brandon)'Drive to Survive' (Matt)Craftwell Cocktails (Matt)Please send in an advice question to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Teenagers Scare the Living Sh*t Out of Me & The Boss

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 15, 2023 57:26


    This week, we cover topics such as: motivating teens to do chores, motivating ourselves to get healthier this year, our favorite weather, music genres, skydiving, and more!Things we've consumed discussed in the episode:'Abbott Elementary' (Jake)Same Same restaurant (Brandon)Bruce Springsteen Concert (Matt)Please send in an advice question to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    The Ballad of Boner Boy & Staying Thrifty

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 8, 2023 51:28


    It's our dirty 30! On this 30th episode, we cover how to get rid of a high school reputation, tips for saving money during "No Spend April", high school embarrassments, our favorite qualities about ourselves, visiting our hometown, our biggest mistakes and lessons learned from them, and more!Things we've consumed discussed in the episode:Tokyo Bananas (Jake)'80 For Brady' (Brandon)'La Dolce Vita' (Brandon)'Pepsi, Where's My Jet?' (Matt)Please send in an advice question to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Magic Mushrooms & That's What She Said

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 1, 2023 43:41


    In this episode, we cover how to handle a problematic friend/coworker, repetitive jokes, AIM screen names, things we're looking forward to, our childhood dream jobs, and more!Things we've consumed discussed in the episode:Playing soccer with kids (Jake)Woodworking classes (Brandon)Mushrooms (Matt)Please send in an advice question to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Farting in a Job Interview & Don't Mess With Texas

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 22, 2023 57:19


    This week, we get into topics like: tips for traveling to Texas and how to handle embarrassing situations like farting at a job interview. Plus, we cover Southern and Texas cuisine, discuss Texas geography poorly, autobiography titles, work from home setups, the best compliments we've received and more!Things we've consumed discussed in the episode:Pwnisher's YouTube Channel (Jake)'Tár' (Brandon)'Hell is a Squared Circle' (Brandon)Spark amp (Matt)Please send in an advice question to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Joining the Mile High Club & Home Maintenance

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 14, 2023 58:33


    In this episode, we get into topic like: tools needed for home maintenance, tips on whether or not to join the mile high club, the game 'No Thank You Evil', 'Poker Face', The Scarecrows, things we wish we were better at, zombie weapons of choice, how we'd spend our last day on earth, and more!Please send in an advice question to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Cyber Friendships & Dating with the Runs

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 8, 2023 61:14


    This week, we cover whether or not virtual friendships are as legitimate as in-person ones, getting diarrhea while on a date, DrLupo, 'That Texas Blood', sensory deprivation tanks, garden hose sprayers, the Third Place, toilet paper vs bidets, guilty pleasures, jury duty, and more!Please send in an advice question to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Reconcilable Differences & Jackassery

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 1, 2023 51:32


    In this episode, we discuss settling minor arguments with your significant other, blind spots we have in pop culture, 'The Menu', 'Tulsa King', pottery classes, if we've ever gone viral online (including the time when Jake accidentally went viral in the adult fetish community), our favorite rainy day activities, things that consistently make us laugh, and more! Here's a link to the video we mentioned in the episode: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S8rNRmmosmAPlease send in an advice question to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Meatloaf & Lots of Fart Sound Effects

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 25, 2023 46:13


    On this week's episode, we finally figure out how to use a soundboard live on the show, and it gets abused immediately. Plus, we discuss a question related to Meatloaf's hit song, 'I Would Do Anything For Love (But I Won't Do That)', how to stay motivated at a hobby, gose beer, HBO's 'The Last of Us', 'The English', volcanoes, features we notice on others, our senses of style, and more!Please send in an advice question to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Video Game Addiction & No-Go Destinations

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 18, 2023 49:28


    This week we cover such topics as: video game addiction, places we would NOT like to travel to, Netflix's 'Wednesday', 'Babylon', trampoline parks, our least favorite beverages, favorite pizza toppings, places we go to be alone, and more!Please send in an advice question to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Loan Sharking to Friends & Beating the Winter Blues

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 11, 2023 40:51


    On this episode, we cover topics such as: the effects of lending money to friends, tips for combating seasonal depression, pizza, fried chicken, Dickens' 'A Christmas Carol', 'The Banshees of Inisherin', recent discoveries in the field of energy, landscapes we'd like to live in, childhood fears, and more!Please send in an advice question to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Life's Luxuries & Fortnite

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 4, 2023 41:55


    In this first episode of the new year, the guys discuss such topics as: things in our lives we consider luxuries, whether or not it's worth it to debate politics with others, The White Lotus, Coke vs Pepsi, Oktoberfest lager, Fortnite, naps, recent vacations, our favorite subjects in school, and more!Please send in an advice question to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: AceSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

    Auld Lang Syne & Killing Rats

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 28, 2022 43:02


    Happy New Year! This week, we cover topics like advice you'd give yourself only a year ago, New Years Eve plans as you get older, building a PC, rat extermination, highland cows, champagne, words to describe the previous year, goals for 2023, and more!Please send in an advice question to: qualifiednonsense@gmail.com and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon BernhardtMusic: Ace & Auld Lang Syne (Instrumental) - Jingle Punks https://youtu.be/N0rJP01QnFwSound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

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