So You Think That Was Good Do You?

The name's Bond, Pierce Brosnan. That's right, this week we're finally covering the legendary Goldeneye (1995), in which our suave superspy dodges bullets, thighs, and sexual harassment lawsuits while desperately trying to formulate a plan beyond 'getting into a room'.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel. 

What happens when a plane crashes in the jungle, with a baby its only survivor? Well, you get George of the Jungle (1997). And whilst he isn't able to string a complete sentence together without the assistance of his ape companion, his more primal drives very much survive the crash. Join us as George smashes his way through everything in the jungle, including; trees, rock faces, Leslie Mann, and at the very least an elephant and a gorilla.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.   

In what has become a competition to find the worst movies of all time, Evan has made an epic choice. Dreamcatcher (2003) is basically just Alien, but where the aliens shoot out your back end. Even with a twist that rivals Dusk Till Dawn, we cannot in good conscience recommend this movie.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.   

Light up a ciggy and wake up your depressed wife, it's time to watch The Lawnmower Man! Also known as 'The worst film we have ever watched', this film is a heartwarming tale of ambition, self-belief, corporate corruption and BEES. Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.   

The Man in Black fled across the desert, and the Gunslinger followed. And then they continued though the desert, and then through some rubble, and then past some grey buildings. Every now and then a laser blasts into the Dark Tower. Rinse and repeat. This is The Dark Tower (2017), a terrible movie based on one of the best book series of all time. But it turns out if you talk about something you love, it also becomes terrible.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.

Don't be fooled by the shelves upon shelves of useless crap, Leland Gaunt will run down to his little basement to get the thing you most desire in this world. In Stephen King's Needful Things (1993), the Devil (maybe) comes to Castle Rock to sow discord between the good townsfolk. And whilst he proves he can see the future, he fails to predict just how boring two hours of cinema can be.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.  

Who hates you and who do you love?!! Well, he's not here this week so join Professor Carl and Professor Sam as they review 1987's The Running Man.

Stephen Spring continues with an amaizing trip through middle America. Where we're going, we don't need seatbelts, airbags, or any awareness of children standing in the road...Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.  

In one of Stephen King's most famous tales, creepy neighbor (Jud) takes Dr Louis Creed on a tour of the local cursed Pet Sematary. After a tragic accident on America's busiest road, Louis hopes to revive his soup-of-a-son by pouring him into a cat-shaped hole.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel. 

In this next addition we take a look at Gremlins 2 (1990), one of the worst sequels of all time. And don't worry, I know we've been talking about Groundhog Day a lot, but this isn't that again. Definitely Gremlins 2... definitely.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel. 

Ever wondered what it would be like to adopt a 30cm high mouse, bring it home to your son, and then make two movies about it? Wonder no longer as we dive into... *click*.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel. 

In Groundhog Day (1993), Phil must learn to be a nicer boy. He starts by ploughing everyone in town, then spends time learning as much as he can. The most important knowledge he gains is that Rita likes boats but hates the ocean... which of course is the key to her panties.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel. 

This week we're covering the absolute classic Face/Off (1997), A.K.A. what happens when you give John Woo an unlimited budget, a half-baked idea and far too many lasers. Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.

Having been rejected from the Six Chicks, Jenna travels into the future to wreak havoc on the multiverse. First she forces her only friend to betray their company, then she tries to break up the marriage of her former best friend. When he rejects her, she travels back in time to make sure she's the only choice.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel. 

Josh's poorly phrased wish, to the world's most literal Zoltar, means he must live 6 weeks as a 30 year old man. In that time he snakes the position of vice president at a toy company, where he blows minds with a bug that transforms into a robot and gets groomed by the resident sleep-around Susan. Whilst we all loved Big (1988), we couldn't quite come to terms with the... implied relations.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel. 

"At an Antarctic research station, a crack team of mostly not scientists discover some kind of Dog Thing. And whilst obviously not a dog, The Thing (1982) goes onto become everyone else, and nobody knows who is and who isn't a Thing. Maybe everyone is a Thing, we don't know... that's very clear in this episode."- Evan Thing, 2024.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel. 

Crack open the Christmas Carlings under the New Year Tree! It's January and time for a new theme: New Year, New You. This episode, we watched 2003's Freaky Friday, a movie that takes place in one day but will surely have terrible long term consequences for many involved. We follow Jamie Lee-Curtis and Lindsay Lohan as they ruin careers, futures and lives all in the pursuit of selflessness...

The best way to decide whether to watch Scrooged (1988) is with a simple question: "Have you ever seen A Christmas Carol?"> Yes: No need to watch this then, you've got all the bases covered.> No: Oh, then go watch that instead because it's that but worse.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.  

All round good guy, Jack Frost, is raised from the dead by a mournful toot of a magical harmonica to learn the very Christmassy lesson that it isn't very Christmassy to rise from the dead on Christmas.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.  

On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me... Divorce papers and a traumatising custody battle. To kick off the festive season, Evan Jonny and Sam break down a truly dark Christmas classic, starring Tim Allen, Judge Reinhold, and other criminals too!Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.  

When he's not selling 200 mattresses a day, Harold Langston is busy shopping, fighting with postmen, or stealing from his neighbour. Basically, anything to avoid going to his son's Karate lessons. And we don't blame him, but we do blame the writers for not realising there isn't a premise for a movie in this movie.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel. 

If you thought last week's instalment of Keanu-vember was obscure, you ain't seen nothing yet. Grab your wife and two children and listen along together as Evan and Sam attempt to produce meaningful insight, but mostly just end up saying 'blue'. Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel. 

For the next installment of keanu-vember, we delve into the self-asserting science of Chain Reaction (1996), where Eddie Kasalivich discovers the correct frequency to create a hydrogen bomb and/or boil a tank of water... we never quite figure that out.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.

It's episode 1 of Keanu-vember! Double that brain capacity, get your VCRs ready, shout for Room Service and strap in for the Jesusest of times as we celebrate the sci-fi works of Keanu Reeves beginning with the adventures of Johnny Surname in Johnny Mnemonic (1995).Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.

This week we're joined by the brilliant boys from the Blockblunders podcast, Barry and Pat, for Rat Race (2001).Casino owner and gambling enabler, Donald P. Sinclair, pits seven unwitting people against each other in a race for a prize of 2 million dollars. Along their journey, each tries to outdo the others for most illegal acts committed and most roadside events attended.Follow these fantastically funny guys over on Instagram and find links to all their episodes on their website.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.

Pauline loves surgery almost as much as she hates the church, her mom, people calling her out on her weirdness, and just about any social norm. Based on the short film of the same name, Excision (2012) proves you can't write a script if every other line starts with "and then".Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.

Under the guise of new content, Bill and the gang rehash much of the first half the movie in their effort to defeat Pennywise. But this time they have a secret weapon; Silver. A character, in the form of a bike, who was absolutely set up in the prior half. Together, the bike and "we" gather their strength to destroy IT once and for all... by doing exactly what they did the first time.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.

Tory, Nathan, Ozzie and Alex face off in a deadly game of Top Trumps with the titular Leprechaun. Desperate to find his crock of gold, this murderous [redacted] uses every power in the Leprechaun handbook to catch them; including teleportation, small cars, biting, and scratching.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.

Blissfully unaware Gabe, know-it-all Sari, and rice kingpin Uncle Ben continue their grave robbing spree with the tomb of Khor-Ru. But having secured a magic rotting baby hand, Gabe unwittingly causes the return of the mummy.Music created by Pantile.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.

Pennywise the dancing clown, with powers both tangible and thematic, threatens the children of Derry in IT (1990) Part One. Bill and the Cult of We must harness the power of their imagination to ensure Pennywise remains weak to the big three: silver, acid, and the Korean War.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.

Well well well, Spoopy Season is upon us once again and we begin a 9 week attempt to make Jonny cry starting with The Ring (2002): a 2 hour white-knuckle adventure of record rooms, videotapes, record rooms, newspapers and record rooms.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.

Young Jerry has everything you need for a classic Goosebumps tale; a haunted piano, an overactive imagination, and beautiful hands. This titillating trifecta draws the attention of master robotics engineer, Mr Toggle, who proves Piano Lessons Can Be Murder.Music created by Pantile.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.

A damaged and deranged madman is on the loose and the people of Gotham aren't safe! Luckily, they get a bit of a reprieve when he has to fight the Joker for a bit. It's Batman vs. Vatman in a movie that can only be described as one we watched this week.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.

The cream-of-the-top Sheriff of Prosperity must solve her toughest case yet: the case of whether or not spiders have heads. Meanwhile, Chris McCormick returns from his 10 year self-imposed exile to re-open the local mine and locate an unrealistically large gold ore vein. All this and more in Eight Legged Freaks (2002), a movie mostly about spiders 50 times their original size, moving at -10 times their original speed.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.

The titular Blade (1998) learns Los Angeles' darkest secret, its entire butcher population is also its entire vampire population. Now Blade must complete his most important mission yet: to find a cure, to stop the vampire tornado god, and to answer this universes most important question; why are motherf*****s always tryin' to ice skate uphill.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.

After Luke Graham becomes the lone survivor of the Martian Space Tornado Security System™, Jim, Woody, and Terri must make the Mission to Mars (2000) to save him. Little do they know, Mars' most unpopular citizen may be the only reason they (and we) were there to begin with.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.

Dog Soldiers (2002) is primarily a film about trying to say something cool before you die, but there's also a quirky subplot where a group of soldiers must survive the night against a household worth of werewolves. The twist is that three other people are also werewolves, so by the end, we have about nine werewolves. Bet you've never seen a movie with that many werewolves.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.

In The Witches (1990), a coven of reality-bending witches is unable to decimate a simple mouse-boy called Jake. Even the Grand High Witch, who is able to disintegrate others with a thought, is defeated by our cheese loving hero. And let's not forget all the help from our sugar loving hero (Luke Grandma), who must face the ultimate foe: diabetes.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.

Britain's horniest man, Austin Powers, makes his debut as the international man of mystery. His mission: to convince us that this movie definitely has a plot, even though all evidence says otherwise.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.

Budding psychopath, Kevin McCallister, uses his Christmas wish to make his family disappear in time for the holidays. Now he's Home Alone, festivities are to include trespass, thievery, torture and battery, all he needs are victims. Harry and Marv, you may enter the killing floor.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.The "tree surgery" Netflix series I reference is Big Timber. It's good, watch it.

Having mastered the "palms-out" school of acting, Brooke is cast in her school's rendition of Phantom of the Opera. Unfortunately for Brooke and her friends, there's a homeless man under the stage, a little boy who breaks into her home, and a Phantom in the Auditorium! It doesn't seem like much else can go wrong, but then you realise this is the worst episode of Goosebumps you've seen so far.Music by Pantile.Follow us on Twitter and Instagram.

We continue our journey into discovering whether Goosebumps was really as goose as we bumps it was. We take a trip on a bus, to a forbidden bunk, in an isolated camp, run my child neglecters, on the moon? With more twists than is technically necessary, Welcome to Camp Nightmare delivers a little bit more than your standard episode.Music by Pantile.Follow us on Twitter and Instagram.

The Lost Boys have taken over Neverland! That's right, it's the first ever Sam and Carl episode as we are joined by special guests: Sam's Squeaky Chair, Sam's Creaky Mexican Apartment and The Many Cars Outside Sam's Mexican Apartment! Join us as we document the endless crimes of Warlord and Snitch Tinkerbell and commit half a plane of people to the Boo Box in our review of Hook (1991).Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.

Lucy, who's definitely just a normal girl, discovers the local librarian to be a monster. Determined to prove she isn't just crying monster again, she purposefully forgets a series of belongings to use as an excuse to enter a public building.Music by Pantile.

Certified krej, Michael, resorts to tampering with the space-time continuum to rid himself of that well deserved title and his prank-loving little sister, Tera.Music by Pantile.

This is the hardest episode description I've ever had to write, because this movie was completely devoid of anything interesting. The most notable thing about this is that Tron (1982) is named after its titular character Tron (the program), but I thought Tron (movie name) was just the name of the neon motorbike video game. So... there you go I guess.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.

In the late 18th century, there was a town sustained solely by the bullying of one worm-loving-girl, Carly-Beth. Determined on leveling the playing field, Carly-Beth steals/ grossly underpays for a custom mask from a man who's unaware he owns a mask shop. But the mask has a mind of its own, and slowly corrupts Carly-Beth to the point where her voice changes... just a little bit. All of this and more, in our foray into Goosebumps: The Haunted Mask (parts 1 and 2).Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.

Mario, Luigi, Daisy and Daniella (?) cross into dinotown/koopaville to stop King Koopa from merging it with the overworld. With three clicks of their red rocket boots, some courage, some brains, and by turning the villain into a puddle, they will define the place of Super Mario Bros. (1993) in cinema as completely different from any other film.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.

Babe (1995) is the tale of a pig-turned-sheepdog who does everything in his power to convince the World that gentle farmer, Arthur Hoggett, has lost his mind. With a few neat B plots that tackle segregation, blood traitors, and the moral dilemmas of animal farming, there really is something to darken the mind of any child just trying to watch a movie about a nice pig.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.

Womanizer and mum-dressed-man, Henry Roth, takes full advantage of Forgetful Lucy's clinically diagnosed brain mash disorder to stimulate fifty different ways for him to get off without any commitment. 50 First Dates (2004) is essentially a game of cat and mouse, where the mouse forgets it's a mouse every day, and the cat is absolutely desperate to get its fishy little fingers to second base.Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.

Break out your finest washing & snotting bowl to celebrate the return of Sam and Carl in an episode we hope is to your liking as we go hiking with a group of Vikings and bear witness to the Bear Caves, Cave Bears, bare kids, Bear Men, Bears in Caves and Caves in Bears(?) of The 13th Warrior (1999)!Music created by Jack Parsons.Follow us on Twitter & Instagram and check out our YouTube channel.