Cultivation Podcast

3 IMPORTANT Takeaways   Change is universal. We can't deny or eliminate change. We can guide and steer change.    I'm back! Welcome to Season 7 of the Cultivation Podcast, which is all about the journey of change in your life.   Change is a universal human experience. That got drive home to me when I spent hours upon hours talking with my grandmother about all the changes she had seen in her life.    While your lifetime may not see the switch from gas lamp street lights to electrical lighting or switchboard telephones to automated digital calls, there has been change in my life and there has been change in your life.    Since the day we were born, we have been experiencing change in our lives and the lives of people around us. We may have been resistant to it or embraced it, loved it or hated it, or were emotional about it or logical about it.    But…We can't deny or eliminate change in our life.   So, how do we embrace and navigate the change in our life?    You will experience change, and I will help you to determine how you will respond to the change cultivating in your life right now.   In this season, we will explore: How can I map out what I want the results of change to be? The unknowns of change Understanding the season of change we are in Asking if we are being provoked to change We want to hear your season of change: Message, comment and engage with us on YouTube, Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook.

We're closing out season 6 of the Cultivation Podcast with a very special guest...My wife, Jami Hammel! She joins me for the second time on the podcast for an unscripted discussion as we wrap up the theme of self-care.   We talk about what self-care looks like, overcoming parental guilt, navigating the seasons of life, the need for a date night, supporting each other's hobbies, and sharing success.   See some of our discussion below and be sure to listen so you hear the full, in-depth discussion:   Tom: What is self care to you?  Jami: Self-care is a lot of different things and it looks older when I was younger with young kids. Self-care is a little bit of alone time. I enjoy shopping alone or getting a manicure, pedicare, massage, or getting coffee by myself.     Tom: What would you say to yourself about the guilt of self-care? Jami: There's the “Mom guilt” of feeling we're not taking care of the kids, and you have to realize it's okay to take care of yourself. You can't go, go, go all the time, you need down time.    Tom: How important is self care to a relationship? Jami: Date night is super important, we do it every week. Maybe it's simple, we just go out for coffee and talk...Being intentional is the key because it's never perfect.   Tom: How important is it to support each other's interests and share successes? Jami: It's super important to give you space to do what they love to do, even if it's not your biggest interest.   Tom: I try to be invested in your success. Jamie is a health coach and the face of that, I'm the support of that. So, I'm always trying to figure out where I can help and I'm seeing the reverse investment in myself.  Jami: I wouldn't be as successful without your help and encouragement. And, everyone can do that for their spouse. I think words of encouragement go a long way.

Season 6 of the Cultivation Podcast continues its journey discussing the necessity and value of self-care. This week's episode is about the value of taking care of ourselves to we can stay active.    We have to build in healthy motion in our lives to improve ourselves physically. I don't mean getting a Hollywood superhero physique, but one of the worst things we can do to ourselves is to stay stagnant.   I don't love the gym, but I love having the energy, strength and endurance to show up in my loved ones' lives and be the best version of myself.   So, what are some steps for promoting physical-care?    Sleep — Develop a healthy sleep rhythm. We're never going to feel motivated to do jumping jacks if we don't have the right amount of sleep. Diet — What you're putting into the gas tank will determine how well our engine runs. Our blood pressure, our strength, even our joint health is determined by what we eat. Eating — Take a lunch break! Not eating because you're so busy is a terrible habit. Eat in rhythm and on time. Movement — And if you're on a break, go for a walk. Healthy motion doesn't mean running a 5K or bench press, it can be a short walk around your workplace or walking your dog down the street. Stretching — Make sure you're mobile enough to accomplish your goals and commitments. Stretching promotes movement and that means being able to do what you need to do Rest — Take your vacation time. Not taking the time to rest and recover means the world isn't getting the best version of you.

This week's Cultivation Podcast continues the journey of self-care by exploring how you can take care of yourself professionally so you can perform your job at the highest level possible.    You can't improve as an employee if you're worn out, burnt out, or bored. Showing up as the best employee possible is not just about serving your company, it's about being your best self to leave an impact on other people.   Here are some ways to take care of yourself in the workplace so you can achieve your potential:   Engage with Supervisor — Meet with your supervisor to see what their expectations are. Sometimes we set ourselves up with what we imagine our work expectations to be, only to find out they are completely different. Or if you own a business, meet with other business owners to find ways to raise the bar for yourself.  Challenge Yourself — Employees become lazy on the job when they get bored, which is why it's important to challenge yourself in the work environment. Every job has its own parts we don't like, but the goal is to overcome that and grow from it. Set up a Peer Group — Set up a group built for challenging one another and taking you all to the next level. A community for workplace tasks that is not about improving the company, but support to be a better employee and perform in a professional way. Set Healthy Boundaries — Have boundaries with staff and clients to avoid taking work home so you aren't drained. You can not give out your cell number or don't answer emails/work calls after 9 p.m. Very few things are a true emergency, so don't let someone else's emergency become your problem. Invest in Your Business IQ — Are you growing your skills? Get new training, read business books, listen to business podcasts to raise the bar for yourself. Attend Professional Development — We live in a digital age, but going in-person to conventions and conferences is super important. You have to soak up that environment and energy of a live event because it transforms your mindset. 

Season 6 of the Cultivation Podcast is dedicated to self-care. This episode dives into the sticky subject of emotions. Keeping emotions pent up is a terrible idea because it means they will explode. So, you need to process what we're dealing with in order to avoid a hurricane of emotions.   Emotional care is about allowing yourself to experience your full range of emotions, embrace that, and process it maturely.   My household uses the phrase “Stop, challenge and choose”. I do that to identify why I am experiencing that emotion.    Below are some ways you can promote emotional care in your life:   Experience — None of us are immune to emotions, so the key is to conquer those emotions by experiencing them. But that doesn't mean letting them control you. Part of that includes having a group you can vent to in a healthy, honest, and clear way.  Identify Emotions — Assign an emotion to a task, adventure, or workload. If you aren't intentional, you're allowing yourself to be controlled by your emotions. For example: Avoid building stress at work by celebrating successes.  Have an Outlet — Find something you can enjoy, use music to put you in a positive headspace, or find a quiet place to pause and gain control over your emotions.  Have an Accountability Partner — You need someone who will call you on your junk. When you're blinded by your emotions, it's important to have that person who will check you. Or when you hit a high stress point, communicate that to select people and give them the ability to call you on it. Let It Go — If you're dealing with bitterness or anger towards someone, it will cause your emotions to rule you. Part of emotional self care is to let some things go so that your emotions toward a person/situation/past experience won't hold you captive to your emotions.

This week's episode of the Cultivation Podcast continues the season's theme of self care by discussing relationships. Relationships add meaning and purpose to your life.    How many great memories do you have by yourself? And how many solo achievements do you wish you had been able to share with someone else?   Nothing good happens in isolation and the world we live in has a lot of mental stress as people feel more isolated and less connected.    Here are some ways to maintain supportive, healthy and diverse relationships:   Prioritize — Don't use your personality type as an excuse for not building healthy, supportive relationships. For all my introverts out there, being alone is how you refresh but you still need to be with other people. To extroverts, just because you're outgoing doesn't mean you have real friends, I know many extroverts who are lonely.  Recognize Your Responsibility — There are different levels of responsibility and importance for relationships. My wife takes priority above my friends because I promised that to her at our wedding. For my daughters, I am the most influential relationship in their life right now and it only helps them when I prioritize that relationship. Share Experiences — Make relationships about experiences, not about stuff. Giving gifts is a great way to add value, but sharing experiences is a great way to create memories and bring you closer together. Take vacations or have that backyard barbecue as a relational investment. Set Boundaries — Set healthy boundaries with your work schedule so you have time to spend with your family. Go to bed early so you have the right mindset and energy level for quality time with your friends and family. Carve out time in your schedule for getting into your community.  Form Diverse Relationships — Be friends with people who don't share the same views as you. We become so much more mature and enriched when we have actual conversations that don't fully align with us. My greatest growth potential comes in my relationships, so I challenge you to have relationships with people who are different from you.

This week's Cultivation Podcast continues the journey of self-care and self-investment in order to be the best YOU possible, with special guest Vanessa Suazo. Vanessa is Tom's personal trainer and joins the podcast to talk about    Vaness and Tom talk about her dream job, and how it shifted from veterinarian to journalism and now helping people take control of their health.    Tom notes that people who do a job that they hate and asks Vanessa how she made a change to follow her passion, with Vanessa revealing that it was others showing her how talented she is helping others in their fitness.    And, she admits that her own personal health is important but knows she has to lead by example in order to help others achieve their goals.   She shares insight into knowing how clients have crossed over from “can't” to achieving and that impact of seeing growth and progress, saying her job is fulfilling because she sees people bettering themselves.    Tom says everyone needs a coach and she says that coaching is unique because it requires a close personal relationship. Vanessa reveals the best part about being Tom's coach — he's disciplined and wants to do things the right way — and her least favorite thing — all the questions.   She gives some free advice to get them started on their health journey: Do the basics. Vanessa says not to dive head first into a fancy, strenuous program. She says to eat well, drink enough water, and get sleep first before aiming big.   The pair even get into discussing their favorite lower body workouts, Vanessa's next goal of training for a daunting Spartan Ultra Race, and how much Tom complains about burpees.

This season of the Cultivation Podcast is about how we can invest in and rejuvenate ourselves via self-care. So far, we've talked about our psychology, work, and emotions but we need to look at our whole being, not just one aspect.    This includes spirituality. Spirituality is a sense of perspective beyond our day to day life. It's about recognizing life isn't just about the day to day grind, there's another plane and realm. Personally, my spirituality is my faith that Jesus Christ is the son of God and he died to remove the barrier of sin from God.    Spirituality is a key component to who we are as a person — our purpose is to impact other people and we can't step into that purpose if we ignore the spiritual side of our being.   Below are action steps on building spiritual care in your life:    Reflect — In Western society's rat race, we need that silence and time to reflect. That means prayer, meditation, journaling, or enjoying nature. It works best when you do these regularly. Growth — Challenge yourself by reading/listening to scriptures daily to learn and studying sermons to get a different perspective. Getting the same views and lessons only stagnates growth. Go to Church — There is something powerful about being in a live experience. We're built for community and so is our spirit. Soaking up that energy and atmosphere is super important to feeding our spirit. Be in Nature — Look at the majesty of creation. Taking adventures like hikes and camping are fun, but doing something new creates an awakening. Being in nature can awaken your spiritual being. Honor Others Spirituality — Honoring the spiritual being of others can form a connection. Experience other people's creativity and spirit. Share the spirituality of another person.  Have Conversations — Schedule time to have conversations with others about spirituality. Recognize spirituality is who you are, so share that journey with a community. 

Season 6 of the Cultivation Podcast is all about self-care and the process of taking time to be intentional about how we're growing and leading ourselves.   Self-care seems like a crazy topic in our self-centered world, but we often neglect our self-care because we are trying to chase after a better version of ourselves!   Self-care starts with our mindset. Many of our obstacles take place in our minds, and we give up when we get overwhelmed.    Psychological self-care is about going to a place where we can clear our heads and engage in those key areas of our lives and refresh. So here are some steps on how to do that:   Get enough rest — We are overworked trying to overachieve and we don't get the right amount of sleep, which impacts almost all areas of our body. Sleeping actually resets your brain. It is medicine to your mind. Keep a gratitude journal — There is a lot of negativity in this world, so write out things you are grateful for. Maybe it's as simple as a beautiful sunset or a good meal. But if you make it a routine, when you're having a bad moment you can reflect on positive areas in your life. Seek outside help — We love our friends and family, but at some point you need to take an inventory of the amount of outside help you have available. Michael Jordan won 6 NBA Championships, but he had a coach. So, if the No. 1 player in that sport's history has a coach, then you need a professional who tries to better you. Find a hobby away from work — We need downtime, so find a hobby that provides some unplug time. After you engage with your hobby, you should feel refreshed but don't consume too much of your time, money, or relationship capital. Unplug from technology — Put away the phone, let that email sit, don't get on Facebook. Interruptions in today's world are numerous, but you need time away from those constant interruptions that continue to take away from your brain. You can't give the best effort and version of yourself if you are constantly being distracted.  Make time to relax — Buy a hammock, go hiking, or just relax on the couch with a book. We have to schedule time to rest and relax. Allow life not to run you, but for you to run life. Engage in positive friendships — Relationships have an incredible power to positively impact our education, finances, and mindset. Our peers set the bar of what is normal, so make sure you are around positive friends who influence your life. 

We are closing out Season 5 of the Cultivation Podcast with Tom’s wife, Jami! She returns to wrap up the words to live by season by discussing “Dreaming and Confidence”.   Confidence is defined as a feeling or consciousness of one’s power or resilience in one’s circumstances; faith or belief one will act in a right proper way; quality or state of being certain; relation of trust or intimacy.   While Jami is Tom’s wife of 21 years, a mother, musician and Health Coach, she had to learn confidence. In her life, she built that by getting healthy because it brought on another level of capability. But she adds that means getting healthy in all areas of her life and relearning things about herself.    Tom says we are the single most influential voice in our own lives, what we say to ourselves about ourselves carries a lot of weight. Healthy self-talk means shutting out negative thoughts of unworthiness or incapability. That can be as simple as recognizing that what we do or say to ourselves in the morning will shape our day.    Dreaming is defined as “to consider a possibility or imagine”. Jami underscores the importance of dreaming by revealing how three years ago she really started to dream and saw opportunities come, the dreams get bigger, and more dreams start awakening. She encourages you to dream big, and don’t feel guilty about wanting more because it’s okay to accomplish your dreams.    She says we get stifled in our dreams by worrying about what others will think about our dreams. But she notes that realizing your dreams can inspire others.   Tom and Jami give the following tools for accomplishing your dreams: Make a dreamboard. Don’t be scared to put what you want to have or accomplish, especially when they can help other people. Choose a word for each year. This can be a theme for how you live your life and approach your year.  See it behind your eyes. When you close your eyes, what did your five-year-old self see? Over time, those dreams get pushed down and we need to rediscover what we wanted.

The penultimate episode of Season 5 of the Cultivation Podcast features a very special guest...Tom’s wife! Her first time on the podcast will see the couple discuss “Purpose and Comparison” as they wrap up the words to live by season.   Jami is not only Tom’s wife of 21 years, but she is a mother, musician and Health Coach.   Comparison is the examination of two or more items to establish similarities and dissimilarities. Tom and Jami have seen people be paralyzed by comparisons. Jami advises that while unhealthy comparisons can kill your motivation, healthy comparison can inspire you to be better.   Tom explains unhealthy comparisons are based on comparing yourself to others who have a special skill or unique ability that doesn’t translate to your skills. Meanwhile, healthy motivation is about emulating people you look up to and comparing yourself to identify your growth.    Jami’s tips for overcoming unhealthy comparisons are to create a mindset that you need to know who you are and be comfortable with yourself. You can’t be anyone else, you need to bring your unique skills and talents to the table.    She also advises you not to measure yourself with a public image. Public personas, like on social media, are a cultivated and perfected image that doesn’t reflect reality. There’s so many things behind the scenes we don’t see, we can’t compare ourselves to it.   Purpose is defined as something set up as an object or end to be obtained. Jami discusses that while being a mom and wife has a big purpose in her life, getting her body and mind healthy has awakened a new purpose in her life. Being a health coach helps people find their purpose in life.   Jami and Tom note that a major obstacle to finding purpose is getting healthy. Jami points out that when you start getting your body healthy, you get more confidence and it shows you that you’re capable of more than you imagined. It also showcases that you need to invest in yourself.   Lastly, Jami mentions that when it comes to finding purpose, we need a coach in our life. And not just health, but all areas of our lives.  Find more at our website

3 Must-Hear Takeaways   Sometimes we have to stop planning and just take action. The hardest part of action is getting started. Give yourself grace because small actions lead to a breakthrough.    In this episode, Tom continues the Season 5 theme of words to live by with his explanation of “Action”. Tom notes this podcast is about cultivating dreams, purpose, and possibility. But before we can achieve that, we have to be people of action.     The simplest definition of action is “a thing done” or “the accomplishment of a thing over a period of time”. Getting things done is taking action. Action is over time, done in stages or with the possibility of repetition.    My nature is a planner, but I have had to grow to where at some point I take action. Sometimes we are educated enough and have enough details to where we need to take action and allow the path to become clear while we’re on the journey.    You are capable of learning as you go. Stop thinking and researching, just go do. Since we don't know what we don’t know, it keeps us open to possibilities we might not have considered if we waited until we had all the facts.    Taking action is the energy we need, but it can be one of the hardest steps. When a rocket is launched, the most energy spent is getting off the ground. Action produces momentum. In life, there is usually more talk than action. But inaction doesn’t get celebrated, bring wins, or give us a breakthrough.    A year of action means taking the steps to accomplish all the things we’ve been dreaming about. Give yourself grace for the process. Part of the journey is taking the small action to achieve the breakthrough down the road. It takes time, so break it down and figure out what needs action today, this week or this month.   So, what are you waiting on to get started? You are unique and special. Now, it’s time to take action and get started — write that book, launch that business, take responsibility for your health, improve your finances. www.ourcultivatedlives.com

3 Must-Hear Takeaways   Have a voice in your life who can identify your growth. Measure your growth by setting a baseline and being specific about effort. Celebrate your progress to train your mind for motivation.   Season 5 of the Cultivation Podcast continues to give words to live by with an episode on “Identity”. Tom is passionate about identity because it keeps them on course or knocks them off course to achieving their goals.   Identity is defined as the distinguishing character or personality of an individual or the relation established by psychological identification. Simply, identity is about how you label yourself. How do you answer the question, “Who are you?”    We don’t typically choose our identity, we look to personality tests or others close to us to tell us who we are. We have to decide if we will let others define us or we take responsibility and have an intentional identity.    My identity is evolving because I am constantly growing. Instead of having an accidental identity, I want a personal and intentional identity. That helps me frame and formulate my investment in every relationship, it helps me think about the things I put into others’ lives.    My choices are based around who I want to become. Nothing about my life is accidental. That doesn’t mean my life is scripted, but the inputs are. There is still the mystery of what I don’t know about myself and looking to discover about/within myself.   This podcast is a foundational motivation for people who want to have an intentional identity. We built this, other resources on our website, and I wrote my book because I believe you want an intentional identity so you can become the person you want to become. www.ourcultivatedlives.com

Season 5 of the Cultivation Podcast continues with special guest Denise Korenek. Because this season is all about words to live by, Tom and Denise will discuss “Silver Linings”.    Denise Korenek was raised to do anything she set her mind to. She combined that with her adventurous side to become the holder of a world record. Denise set the record for bicycle land speed for both man and woman at a staggering 183.9 mph.   While that is the highlight, Denise had to overcome a slew of obstacles to get there. She notes that silver linings during that process played a pivotal role in her setting the world record.   She says there are silver linings every day for everyone. The pivotal moment for establishing the mindset to look for silver linings was when her dad passed away. While attending a transformational workshop, Denise had to find what gift she received in his passing. It opened her eyes that positives can be found in anything.   Tom notes that you get what you’re looking for. A lot of people wait for disappointments or look for flaws but the idea of always looking for a silver lining is how you find them. It gives us the strength to overcome difficulties and learn from them so we can grow.   Denise adds that looking for the positives can come down to the words we use, she points out something as simple as the phrase “No problem” has two negatives together. She suggests saying “All good” because those little things can add up to make a difference. Find More at our website

3 Must-Hear Takeaways   Have a voice in your life who can identify your growth. Measure your growth by setting a baseline and being specific about effort. Celebrate your progress to train your mind for motivation.   Season 5 of the Cultivation Podcast is all about words to live by and this episode’s word is “Growth”. Tom explains his passion for growth and why we need to be growing in our lives.   Growth is defined as progressive development; an increase or expansion. Ask yourself how are you growing your mind, soul, skills, purpose, or possibilities? Growth should be happening, you should not be in the same place!   Growth gives us more independence and freedom? What are you dependent on? How do you need to grow and expand your emotions, understanding, and appetite for adventure?   The hard part is that we don’t often see our own growth. We need people close to us who can give us perspective and identify areas where we grew. Find the voice who can identify those areas of growth in your life.   Measure your growth. Identify your current reality to set a baseline for any area you want to grow in. Be specific about how or what effort it will require.   Then, you need to celebrate progress to train your mindset and build motivation. That is a key element because it keeps us motivated to keep growing.   My friend David A. Specht says that our brains are meant to keep growing. Maybe you’re not experiencing the fullness of life because you’ve stopped growing. We have to keep learning and growing.   I ask you, when was the last time you learned something for the first time?  Find More at our Website

3 Must-Hear Takeaways   Motivation is fleeting, so we have to fuel it. Write down what you’re motivated to do and set a timeline on it. Motivation is nothing without discipline.   The Cultivation Podcast continues Season 5’s theme of words to live by with host Tom Hammel diving into the meaning of “Motivation”.    Motivation is defined as the act or process of moving others to act; the condition of being moved to act; a force, stimulus or influence. We need to be motivated to action, or motivate others to action.   The dangerous side of motivation is fleeting. For example: Sometimes we are not motivated to go to the gym or stay within our spending habits. So, we have to fuel our motivation.    But how do we do that? We need to write down what we’re motivated about and then put a timeline on what we’re motivated to do.    Motivation is an emotional state and we need fresh inspiration. That can be this podcast or books, or it can be a reward for doing what you need to do.   Without discipline, motivation is nothing. We need the motivation to do what we have to do when we don’t feel like it. And, we do that by building a structure of discipline.    I want you to get up every day, excited to embrace that day, and cultivate life by staying motivated and implementing the disciplines to fuel that motivation to reach the destination we have for our lives. Find more at our Website

Season 5 of the Cultivation Podcast is all about words to live by. This episode dissects “Adventure and Fortitude” with special guest Doug Reed.   Doug, as a mentor and brother in law to Tom, discusses how adventure is a mindset and gives tips on how to live a life of fortitude.   Adventure is defined as an undertaking involving danger and unknown risks. Adventure means rejecting comfort for finding something new, so a life of risk ends up a life of victory.   Doug says he views adventure as a mindset of how he lives his life. He says choosing to live a life of adventure opens up our mind to embrace life. It causes you to view possibilities instead of problems, an adventurous mindset looks for opportunities instead of what can hold us back.    Doug goes on to say that an adventure mindset is taking a risk but being mindful, not jumping blindly. Tom adds that what holds us back is that fear of the unknown, but the pair points out that losing your sense of adventure in life makes life dull, so you have to work at it. Adventure doesn’t just happen, you have to cultivate an adventurous mindset so you can enjoy life.   Adventure is uncomfortable, costs something, and has an unknown outcome. Doug adds that he has learned a life of adventure requires learning to suffer. When you live a life of dreams and adventure, you have to learn to suffer because it’s the only way you can keep living that life.   Fortitude is defined as strength of mind that allows a person to encounter danger or bear pain with courage. People who have the fortitude to suffer are celebrated because it brings validation.   Doug notes that fortitude is mental toughness that is earned, not given. People who earn things through fortitude have built the muscles in their life to get things done.    The pair gives the keys to developing fortitude:  Be willing to fail. Recognize you will fail and be willing to learn from it. Focus on what we can control. Don’t worry about what you can’t control. Make sure those around you have the right mindset. Those who influence you need to have a grit because it can rub off on you. Learn from fear. Fear shouldn’t be discounted, build courage by learning from your previous experience. Expect adversity. If it’s all easy, it’s not worth anything.  Don’t be easily offended. We let other people dictate the outcome instead of owning it. Do it afraid.

3 Must-Hear Takeaways   Commitment is first an agreement we make with ourselves. Commit to ourselves how we are going to react to and overcome disappointment. To achieve your commitments, write it down and feed that commitment.   Welcome to Season 5 of the Cultivation Podcast! This season has the theme of words to live by because words are powerful. This episode sees Tom dive into “Commitment”.   Commitment is defined as an agreement or pledge to do something in the future. We have to understand that means we made an agreement with ourselves, first and foremost, that this commitment will be something that is non-negotiable in our lives.    We never implement anything until we commit to ourselves how we are going to behave. When we fall into depression is when we break those commitments to ourselves, and our biggest disappointments are those broken commitments to ourselves.   We have probably all been on the end of broken commitments. How do we react to that? We have to commit to ourselves how we are going to react to and overcome that disappointment.  In your future, you will definitely experience disappointment. We cannot allow situations and circumstances to alter our mindset or behavior.   Where are you breaking commitments to yourself or others? The more broken commitments the more flaws we see in ourselves. So, I am asking you to hit the reset button. It’s not New Year’s Day, but you can still start fresh.    Here’s how:  Write it down. Think of one area of improvement, whether it is physical or behavioral, and then master it before you move on.  Feed that commitment. Remove temptations and distractions, or set up reinforcements that fuel that commitment.    I am so proud of you today for taking the step to commit to improving your life and joining me on our journey to live the cultivated lifestyle.

Season 5 of the Cultivation Podcast continues with words to live by and this week’s episode see Tom joined by guest Jason Freen. Jason takes his experience as an international speaker and author to share his insight on the meaning of “Integrity and Compassion”.   Integrity is a firm adherence to a code of moral or artistic value; unimpaired condition or soundness; quality or state of being complete or undivided.   Jason says he defines integrity means doing the right thing when no one is watching. What is your attitude, what are you saying, what are you watching, what is going through your heart, what are your choices when no one is around?   Tom goes on to add that part of the human condition is we have all broken our integrity, but part of getting integrity back is owning it. Jason explains that to do that you need a framework of right and wrong, so that when you break your integrity you own it and ask for forgiveness or you opt to skirt that responsibility. By asking forgiveness, it reestablishes that trust for people to see you as a person of integrity.    Tom adds that it comes down to that we accuse others of what we would do in that situation based upon our integrity or lack thereof. The more we own our broken integrity, the more trustworthy we become and the more we trust others.    Compassion is defined as sympathetic consciousness of others’ distress and intentionality of alleviating.    Jason notes that compassion is about having empathy on those that suffer. He explains that when we coach or lead people towards transformation and become too sympathetic, we start feeling the same impossibilities they feel. Sympathy should be understanding others’ struggles and not being governed by the problems that constrain them.   Tom says fulfilling his purpose will bring joy and energy into other people’s lives. That journey gives compassion for other people’s struggles in finding their purpose. Jason’s work as a speaker serves people via teaching others to discover the “Golden Thread” — what you were wired to do with your God-given gifts — as opposed to following your passion.    Tom takes it a step further to note that passion can be seasonal, passion has to be stoked. But leaning into your giftings and talent will awaken your purpose and compassion.

3 Must-Hear Takeaways   Diligence requires effort that we generate ourselves. We have to be prepared to “Go Pro” with our diligence. To achieve diligence you need to assess your current reality, implement a system and commit to yourself.   Season 5 of the Cultivation Podcast! This season is all about words to live by and this episode’s word is “Diligence”. Tom will talk about how diligence requires grit, fortitude, the determination to complete a task.   Diligence is a steady, earnest and energetic effort; devotion or painstaking work; application to accomplishing an undertaking. To be a diligent person, you will need all the steps, information, and processes but the one thing you can’t get is the diligence or effort to get the thing done.    No one can give you that thing, you have to dig deep within yourself. And, nothing is going to determine the outcome more than the amount of effort you put into it.   There will be moments where we hit a wall and our expertise will end. That’s when it will require additional effort to learn and grow so we can go to the next level. We call it “Going Pro”, that is where we put in professional effort for a professional result.   Maybe your effort has been subpar, but the beauty is that because your effort is from you, you have complete control. Today you can decide to Go Pro and up your effort.   Here are steps to increase our effort in any area of our life: Assess your current reality - are you where you could, should or want to be? Get honest with yourself. Most people don’t put in the effort because they don’t want to admit they are not where they want to be. Implement a system - set a routine, schedule your time in a calendar to build a structure of diligence. Those can be really simple and elementary until it becomes the norm. Commit to yourself - Don’t allow any distractions, don’t allow others’ emergencies to disturb you. Tell yourself these are rocks in your schedule that you are going to do the work and make time to exert effort so you can build that diligence.    I can’t put in the effort for you, you can’t put in the effort for me. It’s on each of us to find the effort to build the diligence that will take us to the next level.

3 Must-Hear Takeaways Our purpose is using our gifts to serve others. We are more valuable when we help others realize their own gifts. Service is less of an act and more of a mindset. The Cultivation Podcast Season 5 continues giving you words to live by with this week’s episode on “Service”. Tom goes over what it means to serve others and how it brings meaning to life.  Across his life, Tom has a history of service — from working at a fast food restaurant and then helping others in the ministry, to now helping awaken the purpose in others. I believe part of our destiny and purpose in our lives is understanding we have gifts, talents and abilities to serve others. Our value is bringing value to others. We need community because our purpose can’t be lived out by anyone else. We are all interconnected and when you are awakened to our mission, it makes every one of us rise to the next level. You make me better, and I hope I make you better.   In my circle, we need to be more interested than interesting. I make my goal to hear your story and serve your purpose. That is why I do what I do through this podcast, my website, and my book. Adding value is how I serve others.   This whole topic is counterintuitive to where society is because we live in a selfish world. You need to realize that you are more valuable when you help others and help them realize they have their own value.    Service is less about an act and more about a mindset. The action we’re doing or the person we’re serving isn’t important. What matters is that we have the mindset to serve people.    I want to build an army of people cultivating to add value in other people. But it starts with a mindset of service.

Season 5 of the Cultivation Podcast is about words to live by and this episode features guest Jamil Frazier. He and Tom discuss the meaning behind “Habits”.   The author, motivational speaker, health coach and CEO shares how his habits shaped his journey. The former college athlete and pharmaceutical sales rep went from a failing marriage and unemployment to a breakthrough by getting his health back. He notes that the journey from a bad place to continuing success was shaped by forming the right habits.   Habit is settled tendency or usual manner of behavior; acquired mode of behavior that has become nearly involuntary; behavior pattern acquired by repetition. Habits are neither good or bad, it’s what you’re doing with them and what their outcome is.   Jamil said the most important habits to move you forward depend on what you want. Failures come when we don’t know what we want, what our goals are. He notes that our habits can be subconscious, so forming new habits requires intentional repetition based upon what we want.   Tom adds that our goals should identify the habits we need to move us closer to that goal, and those we need to remove from our lives. Jamil seconded that by saying this approach is what changed his life around, and fostering healthy habits gave him freedom to pursue what he wanted for his future.

This episode closes out Season 4 of bonus content that couldn't fit in Tom's new book The Life You Were Meant to Lead. Check out our Website One of the ways we live the Cultivated Life is that we play to our strengths. So, why is it so important we know our strengths? We need to understand we aren't strong in everything, we have key areas where we are stronger than others. Understanding those key areas is the only way we can authentically appreciate someone else's strengths.

This episode, like all of Season 4, sees Tom taking bonus content that couldn't fit in his new book The Life You Were Meant to Lead Check out our Website Over the course of this podcast Tom, has been pretty open and honest about failure. But what happens when those around us fail? How do we respond to someone close to us who fails?We should want to create an atmosphere of risk takers. Until we take risks, we won't grow. If no one around you is failing, ask yourself if are you a safe space for people to take risks. Because of part of risks is failing.

This episode, like all of Season 4, sees Tom taking bonus content that couldn't fit in his new book The Life You Were Meant to Lead. Check out our Website Recently, Tom supported in a marathon to raise money for clean drinking water in Sudan. It reminded him of the famous Boston Marathon, which illustrates several life lessons.Before you can even qualify to register for the Boston Marathon, you have to participate in other marathons showing you have a worthy qualifying time.

Episode 10 of season 4 is bonus content from Tom's new book The Life You Were Meant to Lead. Check out our Website In this episode, Tom talks about forgiveness. Growing up in a violent home and fighting with an abusive father created bitterness and tension in Tom's early life. That anger controlled him until he reached a point where Tom decided he didn't want to subject himself to that anymore. Find out the valuable lessons he learned in the process of letting go.

This episode is part of the season made up of special bonus content from Tom's new book The Life You Were Meant to Lead. Check out our Website What does reaching uncharted territory, a new level, new heights previous unimaginable look like? It means living your dream. When we start to pursue our dreams and take action, those dreams give birth to new dreams. Things never on your radar start becoming a reality. Moving into uncharted territory helps you achieve new possibilities you never considered.

This season is all bonus content from Tom's new book The Life You Were Meant to Lead. Check out our Website If money could buy happiness, we would all be happy. Some of the wealthiest people are the most miserable. In living the Cultivated Life, we've got to set up healthy boundaries in our relationship with money.We can't look to money to buy our identity. Stuff can't and won't tell us who we are. You have to own your identity, you can't cheapen it by buying it. That doesn't mean you can't own nice things, it's about having a healthy balance.

Episode 7 this season is bonus content from Tom's new book The Life You Were Meant to Lead. Check out our Website Tom notes that statistics show that we become the 5 closest people we surround ourselves with, which means we have to be very strategic about our inner circle. This highlights the theme of the episode — the power of cultivating a tribe.

Episode 6 is bonus content from Tom's new book The Life You Were Meant to Lead. Check out our Website If you're a parent, your kid has probably asked you a million questions. But those are the most formative things in the brain because they're learning and discovering along the way of the person they will become via the power of questions.This episode will further illustrate the power of asking questions in our lives.

All 13 episodes in Season 4 are bonus content from Tom’s new book The Life You Were Meant to Lead. Check out our Website This episode dives into why we need to learn on how to deal with people. We spend so much energy on learning and growing, that we can lose focus on the importance of being able to understand people. In this episode Tom will explain that for us to move forward, we have to listen, learn, read and work with people.

All 13 episodes in Season 4 are bonus content from Tom's new book The Life You Were Meant to Lead. Check out our Website This episode sees Tom discuss how conflict, even though it can be painful, is crucial to growth. Tom notes that his greatest friendships growing up came from playground fights. He explains that working through that conflict can become the foundation of your best relationships.

All 13 episodes this season are bonus content from Tom's new book The Life You Were Meant to Lead. In the book, Tom talks about the Failure Loop: We take risks, fail, learn, grow, and become successful. Check out our website This episode sees Tom dive into how failure leads to success. He explains that's because it forces us to dig deep about our priorities, focus and intent, so we give birth to the greatest successes.

This episode is bonus content that couldn't fit in Tom's new book The Life You Were Meant to Lead. Check out our Website This episode has Tom explaining why he loves being around people who know their life's purpose. He says it gives him insight into knowing and dedicating himself to becoming the person he was meant to be. Tom says that while our purpose grows with us as we develop along our journey, the traits of finding that purpose stay true.

Season 4 is all about Tom taking bonus content that couldn't fit in his new book The Life You Were Meant to Lead. Our Website Tom notes that this very podcast was born out of pains in his past. He was failing at leading himself while he was challenging others to reach their potential. So, he set out on a journey to self leadership and discovery, and found there were not enough tools about leading ourselves. Thus, this podcast was born.

For the finale of Season 3, the Cultivation Podcast flips the script by having its final interview be with Tom himself. David Specht, Tom’s friend of nearly two decades who he met as a youth pastor in a small Louisiana town, talks with Tom about overcoming a rough upbringing, the process of transforming Tom’s life, and how he learned to lead others along the path of self-leadership.

Following your dream has to result in seeing your income provide enough for you to live on. When chasing your passion, you have to figure out what is most important to you. Instead of giving up hope, hold on to the idea that something better is ahead of you.

Kassie Moon https://www.youtube.com/user/TheKassieMoon Gir Wash your Face https://amzn.to/3ft7RSh You can't do it alone, it takes a community. Sometimes, you have to hit rock bottom before you can get back up and try again. It's okay to not project the perfect life. There's freedom in being vulnerable and admit that you have struggles.

When we become the author of our own story, we have the power to change their world. Put in the reps so that when an opportunity comes up, you are as sharp as possible to take advantage of it. Do not be controlled by the opinions of other people because then you’re having your life written for you.

The only way you fail is if you quit. Everything you do in the now matters, because it’s all connected to your future self. Lean into the community. Have a couple of key people in your life you can rely on.

Healing the Shame that binds you Take a step out and you’ll realize there are things you’re good at that weren’t part of your culture. When you’re on your journey, you need to make peace with the fact that not everyone will be able to join you. Being able to respond to “no” is a very tough, but necessary obstacle that needs to be overcome.

Yaneck Wasiek is a polish-born, award-winning photographer who offers workshops and classes in addition to working with various companies and individuals. He first discovered photography at the age of 8 after he was inspired by his parents. He started his future career 12 years ago while he was still making his way up the ladder at a major tech company. Yaneck sustained dual careers for roughly 8 years, working 40-60 hours per week and then add ing another 20-30 hours into his photography business.   How to Win Friends and influence People  https://amzn.to/2Am0MTH Getting Things Done  https://amzn.to/3gzPTyk The Starbucks Experience  https://amzn.to/2Xf9xIx

Jose Rodriguez knows about the struggles of kids. He overcame a childhood filled with drug dealers, fights, and handcuffs to running a nonprofit that gives hope to others. Rescue A Generation is focused on reaching at-risk students with Jose being a motivational speaker that talks to audiences ranging from school auditoriums to major conferences all across the country. “I believe in young people. Any avenue I can take to get a message of hope to this generation, I do it,” he said.

John Buckner has spent most of his life serving others, whether it be through the church ministry or through health. His mission to help others was formed through his family and their open-door policy. Working with people always came naturally and he felt early on that he wanted to speak life into others. That led him into church ministry where he served people by taking them from where they are to where they want to be. He says that the vehicle he uses may have shifted, but his goal has stayed the same. John discusses how a family tragedy shaped his thought processes as an adult and led him to feel trapped in a dark spot. But, getting his health in order gave him some much needed wins and those little wins all added up to have a bigger effect by giving him the confidence to get other areas of his life in order. High Performance habit https://amzn.to/2Ma1RB2

In this episode, Tom sits down and talks about the journey of self-employment, the business plan, and success, with Bobbitothechef!   

Four years ago, Tom and his family sat down around the dinner table and picked a word that would be the theme for their year. They decided that all their choices and habits would be through the lens of that one word. Year 1 was “Simple,” year 2 was “Generosity,” year 3 was “Courage,” and 2020’s theme is “Pivotal.

Sometimes we can get into a heated conversation that only seems to do damage and goes nowhere. But, you feel stuck and unable to talk to someone because it’s too sensitive of an area. That is why conflict management is so important. We all need to learn to navigate conflict with this set of tools: focus on what you want from the conversation, be a safe place, and have takeaway steps.

Everyone one of us has a story. Sometimes it's more dramatic than another persons story, but every story is valuable because it has lessons and inspiration for others. Your strength is your story, you've overcome and worked through all sorts of difficult things in your life. And, you may bear the scars but they are not a wound. They represent that you're stronger now than before. It shows that those things that tried to break you have strengthened you to take life from a different perspective and walk through things.

Habits are such a key part of who we are as people. They shape our identity. We're known by our habits. For example, you can be a smoker, funny, an athlete, or even a binge-watcher. That is why we must take hold of our habits so we determine our habits instead of them determining us. In Atomic Habits by James Clear, he outlines several ideas that are crucial for owning our habits: 1. The cost of your good habits is now and the cost of bad habits are down the road. If you eat a bowl of ice cream every day, that's going to be more severe than if you choose to eat something healthy instead. And, the cost is that you choose not to have that bowl of ice cream, but you will be healthier. 2. It's your commitment to the process that will determine your progress. Who do you want to become? What do you want your identity to be known as? You first have to build the habit of investing in yourself.

Most people stop right on the verge of success. Many times, we are right on the cusp of getting where we want to be and we just stop, which is why we need to cultivate grit. In order to build in us that don't quit mentality, we first need to realize that we're playing the long game. We need to realize that the things we're striving for are not a sprint, they're a marathon. We need to celebrate progress along the way, but know we're in this for the journey.

We are built for relationships, not isolation. People who are isolated don’t develop in a healthy way. That is why we need to place a high value on relationships and be intentional about them. And, we need to make sure we place the right emphasis on the right relationships. Build relationships with purpose. Let people into your circle who move you forward, you can learn from, are authentic, and hold you accountable. That means investing in relationships. Some develop easier than others, but to be authentic and transformational we need to make a mutual investment. We do this by investing our time and making sure we are authentic and real in those moments spent together.