Barseholes Podcast

In a world where facts no longer exist and everybody's a hypocrite, where is there left for us to go? This week we review: the state of the war in Europe, how social media has destroyed humankind's ability to think, and why people are still wearing masks when they don't have to. Also: the return of Muskwatch, featuring Chelsea Manning (for some reason)! There's a lot going on, and we can't cover it all, but we're doing our best.

Stu's back in the hamster wheel of the west, and Brett is honing his lock-picking skills for the apocalypse to come. This week, we review the Russian paralympic team being banned from the paralympics for the crime of being disabled and born in the wrong country (spoiler alert, we aren't impressed), annoying neighbour voodoo pays off, a glimpse into the exciting world of Papa John's backpack NFTs, and we disperse the fog of war with a wave of our mighty hands. It's OK to be tired sometimes.

Just when we were going to put our tinfoil hats on the shelf for a bit, Putin's soldiers have entered The Ukraine. The question is: why? This week, Stu eats a bunch of toast, Brett kicks some knowledge on the topic Chinese/Taiwanese history, we explore what all of this means for the future of cryptocurrency, and we place our bets on how much time we have until the nukes start flying.

We're experiencing technical difficulties. Is it because Justin Trudeau's cabal of global elites have hacked the Barseholes, or simply a series of unfortunate events? There's just no way to be sure. This week, we discuss the invocation of the Emergencies Act in Canada in response to the Freedom Convoy, Russia's impending invasion of The Ukraine, and what these developments mean for our respective Armageddon preparations. Strap on your tinfoil hats and follow us down the rabbit hole.

The metaverse is here to kidnap our lives, and we're ready to plug in. This week: NFTs, Robot sex, Ghislaine Maxwell's little black book, and much, much more. It's time to a glimpse into the disgusting future of our world and rejoice! 7 billion digital Caligulas are ready to be unleashed...

We're back! After a long hiatus driven by global pandemics and mental breakdowns, the new international version of The Barseholes Podcast is live at last! This episode features: our review of the latest Matrix film, herpes-infected monkeys, and why Brett has soured on Elon Musk. Also: other stuff!

America is burning. Should it be? Probably. The quest for justice continues...

Let's destroy our possible future political aspirations by talking about Anne Frank. Also: Muskwatch.

The question of our time: what up with that? What's going on here? Oooooooooooooooooooo weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!What's up with that? Whats up with that?

Apple vs Samsung and Stu's Horrendous Youtube Channel

Monkeys are jerks, Trump stuff, and a bunch of other stuff. Don't like it, piss off.

Bored of the coronavirus yet? We know we are! Lose yourself for 40 whole minutes in non-COVID-19 conversation, forget about the apocalypse, and enjoy the ride! TIMELINE 00:00 No virus chat 40:53 Told you. No virus chat

Ep. 57 - The Day The Earth Stood Still by Barseholes Podcast

As fears about the coronavirus reach fever pitch, toilet paper fever is spreading like wildfever. Here's what's happening with the strange and confusing COVID-19 situation on the ground in the jungles of northern Thailand. Also, a well-timed crackdown on the ice cream bucket licking trend, the proper etiquette to observe when finding a pube in a pizza, and much, much more. TIMELINE 2:13 Coronavirus update 24:18 Low Season 30:06 The rise of the delivery driver 36:53 Will Trump "suspend" the election? 41:03 The magic of Google Translate 45:14 Voice technology 49:50 Eating around a pube 54:34 Ice Cream Bucket Lickers 56:43 Shitting outdoors 60:00 Fidget Spinners

We are living in strange and frightening times. Coronavirus is spreading rapidly, Dave Chappelle is performing in Bangkok, and we will all soon be living in rolling pod chairs. Let's get down to the nitty-gritty and delve into the hottest topics of the day with all the good humour we can muster. TIMELINE 2:29 Coronavirus 12:59 What makes a good bar? 17:56 Stu's ruined pancreas 18:27 Dave Chappelle in Bangkok 22:10 Expat health insurance 38:13 Infidelity accusations 44:33 The Universal Time Bubble 54:00 What would it be like to be rich?

What can we say. The world is a stupid place, and getting stupider by the day. In this meandering episode, we talk about a little bit of everything. Weird rich people, Ricky Gervais at the Golden Globes, Trips to Canada, Australia's bush fires, A terrible trip to Beijing, The worst New Year ever, World War 3, and everything in between. It's long, a lot of shit talking takes place, and Brett's cat repeatedly attacks him. It's stupid, and there's no point to any of it. You know, like life. TIMELINE 9:32 The surveillance State 15:25 Rich and Famous people are weird 16:53 A random intrusion 23:17 More about rich people 27:17 Three's Company 29:46 Brett's cat attacks 38:00 Dave Chappelle 50:57 Stu's unfortunate trip to Canada 55:58 24 hours in Beijing 1:19:37 Being a foreigner 1:31:18 Australia is burning 1:35:31 Brett's Cat derails everything 1:39:22 WWIII?

We've been away for a while, and a lot has happened. It's time to bring you up to speed on what's gone down since we last published a podcast, including, but not limited to: Brett's new cat. Stu's book, Elon Musk's Cybertruck, and the white Sumo wrestlers colonizing a mighty Japanese sport. Let's get back into it! LINKS The White Sumo in action https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z05-ZStNytI Cybertruck fail https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=udxR5rBq_Vg Smug alert! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AnFAAdOBB1c TIMELINE 2:25 Naming Brett's cat 4:45 Why we haven't been recording 7:29 White Russians vs Bloody Marys (AKA Caesars) 10:35 Tequila and puking on the floor 13:22 Thailand's awesome fireworks laws 17:00 Stu's book 20:06 White Sumo Wrestlers 25:30 When will free streaming be crushed? 40:07 Criticising other people's parenting 46:01 Cybertruck 60:05 Brett gets a smart speaker (hypocrisy check)

What's the deal with mass shootings in America? Can a new Matrix movie turn the tide? What's the difference between Marmite and vegemite? While we're at it, where in the world did they drag Julian Assange off to? These and all your other burning questions will be answered at last, on this week's episode of The Barseholes Podcast! TIMELINE 1:24 Brett has dengue fever 3:20 Vegemite vs Marmite 6:00 What's the deal with fish sauce? 7:43 Clamato 12:40 Stu's new band 17:41 Talking to people on airplanes 46:41 The new Matrix film 1:09:00 Where's Julian Assange?

If you were surprised Jeffrey Epstein committed suicide, just imagine how surprised HE was! Strap on your tinfoil hats and get ready for a trip down the rabbit hole(s), as The Barseholes Podcast explores Hong Kong tensions, social media brainwashing, and why Alex Jones just might've been on to something. It's going to be conspiracy-licious! TIMELINE 2:20 Put on your tinfoil hats 2:42 Best guest ever 6:05 Stu's new chair 6:44 Jeffrey Epstien 15:33 Why Bernie will never be President 37:44 The Great Hack 48:38 The "Best guest Ever" Falls Asleep 1:03:46 Tunnelbear is robbing me

Why is a week 7 days long? Why not 8? Is it all part of some outrageous conspiracy? Which quotes from The Simpsons and Southpark have become a part of our everyday lexicon? Why do Seth McFarlane's movies suck so hard? These and all your other burning questions, answered at last, on this week's episode of the Barseholes Podcast! LINKS The sperm extractor https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ldy4LOgvUCw TIMELINE 4:33 Why is a week 7 days long? 10:20 Treadmill talk 12:50 Stu fatness update 14:55 The sperm extractor 16:47 Brett's spiritual experience 23:29 Simpsons/Sount Park quotes you use every day 27:33 Who's your favourite TV show character ever? 30:18 Team America: World Police - reviewed 31:50 Seth McFarlane's movies suck 33:00 Favourite female actor? 39:40 What's up with The Handmaid's Tale? 45:29 Could deep fakes take down Trump? 50:28 Faceapp is stealing your soul

Is Iron Man a fraud? Why does Elon Musk want to put a microchip in your brain? How long until AI steals all our jobs and we descend into uselessness? These, and all you other burning questions answered at last, in this week's titillating episode of The Barseholes Podcast! LINKS French Iron Man https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2TTshNgo8Rg Elon Musk's Brain Implants https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lA77zsJ31nA TIMELINE 1:41 A brief political check-in 3:58 Podcasts worth checking out 9:50 How's life? 11:33 Human-Pet relationships 12:53 Brett's haircut 13:05 Do your parents "just want you to be happy"? 14:50 Do you even keto, bro? 18:18 Iron man visits Bastille Day 28:45 Elon Musk's brain implants 30:36 AI versions of us 34:39 AI and Universal Basic Income

Should 13 year-olds be allowed to drive superbikes? What happens when environmentalists go too far? Is having a baby similar to having a hot, high-maintenance girlfriend? These and all your other burning questions, answered at last, PLUS the secrets of the Thai market nobody will tell you. All this and more, on this week's edition of The Barseholes Podcast! LINKS Mickey Mouse Cartoon containing viral Thai song https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=83sdwFOL1r8 TIMELINE 1:08 Driving in Thailand 3:30 Teenagers on superbikes 6:33 Stu apologizes for talking politics 7:41 Fake News Update 8:17 Death by environmentalism 13:44 Brett's roadtrip 16:58 Anniversary gift fail 18:55 Thai return policies 24:50 Having a baby is like having a hot high-maintenance girlfriend 30:07 Viral Thai Mickey Mouse Song 32:51 Why the floating market sucks 34:13 How Thai vendors can tell if you're easy to rip off 38:31 Is it OK to be rood to pushy market salespeople? 40:10 If you have a kid, hobos get nothing

The Barseholes Podcast's long-standing policy of not talking about politics falls by the wayside, as the insanity of the current state of affairs takes center stage. Are smart speakers recording asylum seekers as they drink from the toilet while Donald Trump sex traffics AOC deep-fakes? You'll have to listen to find out! TIMELINE 9:20 The government is recording you! 14:40 A trolling relapse 16:20 America is imploding 26:00 AOC visits the border 39:30 Deep fakes 57:19 Brett's camping adventures

After a long hiatus, The Barseholes Podcast is back! Recording live from our brand new Studio 3, this week we discuss watching Sesame Street as an adult, Terminator 6, dogs playing Jenga, and the ethical/philosophical implications of having sex with a robot. TIMELINE 1:14 WTF episode is this? 3:40 Where have we been? 7:55 Introducing: Studio 3 10:00 Terminator 6 12:04 Dogs playing Jenga 13:31 What has Stu learned from watching Sesame Street for a year? 18:22 Would you fuck a robot? LINKS A dog playing Jenga https://youtu.be/1kl3Y82qRDg

This week we report on Songkran shenanigans and ponder the long term effects the Dutch Oven has on relationships. Oh and we carry on about Game of Thrones - yes there are spoilers, no we don't care, hurry up and watch it, what have you been doing with your life! Oh and yeah yeah we know this ones a bit rough. TIMES We'll add this stuff later :P

If you fart while recording a podcast, and the mic doesn't pick it up, does it make a stink? Is the final season of Game of Thrones going to be good? These and all your other questions will be answered at last, on this week's edition of the Barseholes podcast! TIMES 1m:57s Stu's jolly good travels 2m:30s Business travel 7m:20s Taiwan: reviewed 13m:00s Smoke chat 15m:15s The Chiang Mai Cricket Sixes 17m:13s What's a "spirit house"? 19m:05s Struck by lightning while sweeping tombs 21m:00s Brett: pint glass thief 22m:19s Electronic cigarettes and smoke alarms 24m:58s Illegal waterguns 27m:12s The fart 27m:42s The second it hits Brett's nostrils 31m:20s Songkran is coming 33m:00s Game of Thrones final season preview

What's the deal with Chiang Mai air pollution, really? And why are motorbikes hanging from powerlines 4 meters in the ait in the city's center? Perhaps things would be going better if we had more fat, dancing parking attendants around town? Should everyone be voting for "Weed Man" in Thailand's next election? These and all you other burning questions, answered at last, in a very Chiang Mai-centric episode of the Barseholes Podcast! TIMES 1m:40s Butterscotch vodka 2m:10s Tetrault's Grey Goose scam 3m:52s Hiring a Thai nanny 13m:05s Day drinking 16m:18s Michael Jackson update 17m:30s Chiang Mai's pollution problem 24m:34s Vote "Weed Man" 29m:08s Motorbikes in power lines 38m:48s Thai parking attendants 41m:19s The fat parking attendant who dances at Maya LINKS Vote Weed Man! https://coconuts.co/bangkok/news/half-thai-men-agree-bhumjaithai-partys-campaign-fully-legalize-marijuana-poll/ Motorbikes in powerlines https://coconuts.co/bangkok/news/accident-thai-road-leaves-motorbike-tangled-4-meter-high-high-electric-line-photos/

Some disturbing documentaries have been making headlines lately, and 2 more of the world's biggest stars have bitten the dust off the back of their own terrible behaviour. Will we soon be left with no icons to worship? R. Kelly and Michael Jackson, we hardly knew ye. LINKS Little Billy's Not My Lover - In Living Color https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=adIDkAXl5Yk TIMELINE 1m:48s Teething talk 8m:32s Brett's weird sleep schedule 13m:25s Trigger warning 15m:00s Black History Month (it was a rough one) 17m:18s R. Kelly is a bad man. Here's why 31m:33s Brett takes on the Catholic Church 34m:39s Michael Jackson was also a bad man. Here's why 40m:45s We need to talk about Bubbles 50m:26s Jussie Smollet

Thailand has its first Taco Bell. What does this mean for Brett and Stu? What happens when a Thai mailman decides to stop delivering the mail? What can go wrong with a simple delivery job? Why are Canadians so obsessed with American fast food? Is McDonalds good? These and all your other burning questions, answered at last, on this week's edition of the Barseholes Podcast! TIMELINE 1m:10s What's wrong with The Ron Burgundy Podcast? 3m:32s Technical difficulties 7m:31s The YouTube scandal 13m:08s The Thai mailman who stopped delivering mail 26m:52s Is Taco Bell good? (Thailand has one now) 42m:27s Why Canadians are obsessed with American fast food 45m:26s What "Bayou Billy" taught Stu about life 53m:15s Video game chat

It's Stu's birthday, and it's time to review life as a 39-year-old expat. While we're at it, what's the deal with white Rastafarians? Is this a legitimate life choice for a person to make? Also: it's smokey season again! How are our venerable hosts coping? These and all your other questions, answered at last, on this week's edition of the Barseholes Podcast! LINKS Urban Dictionary: White Rasta https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=white%20rasta Jamaicans.com says White Rastas are ok-ish https://jamaicans.com/white-rastafarians/ TIMELINE 2m:48s What's wrong with life in the Chiang Mai suburbs? 7m:00s Making your parents proud 9m:51s Stu's birthday 12m:02s Chiang Mai smokey season 19m:19s Jeff Bezos's dick 22m:13s Doing Yoga in McDonalds? 28m:37s Listener feedback 31m:39s White Rastafarians

Has The Lord of the Rings aged well? Why is crack so wonderful? Did an entire Cambodian "Midget Fighting League" really go to battle against a full-grown African lion? These and all your other questions, answered at last, on this week's exciting edition of The Barseholes Podcast! LINKS Wesel riding a woodpecker https://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/safaris-and-wildlife/Incredible-photo-captures-weasel-riding-on-the-back-of-a-flying-woodpecker/ Cambodian midgets vs a lion https://www.newturfers.com/mwf/attach/38/355838/BBCNEWSWorldLionMutilates42MidgetsinCambodianRing-Fight.htm TIMELINE 2m:45s Fighting your way out of boxing day debt 4m:05s Christmas at Archer's 7m:30s Lord of the Rings breakdown 14m:35s Substance abuse update (why crack is lovely) 19m:25s Thailand legalizes medical marijuana and gay marriage 22m:51s Brett's Assassin's Creed adventures 25m:15s Who is the most famous little person ever? 29m:49s The legend of the Cambodian midget fighting league that took on a lion 37m:09s Weasels riding woodpeckers 47m:12s Why everyone should watch Norsemen on Netflix

Why is digital technology such a pain in the ass? Did the Christian missionary killed on North Sentinal Island deserve what he got? What happens when a Thai policeman asks for a ride in the middle of a high-speed chase/shootout? These and all you other questions answered at last, in this week's edition of the Barseholes Podcast! LINKS Thailand's most underrated tourist attraction http://khaosoknationalpark.com/ The Crazy police chase https://coconuts.co/bangkok/news/thai-cop-hops-back-pedestrians-motorbike-movie-like-car-chase-ensues-video/ The Christian Missionary who got murked https://edition.cnn.com/videos/world/2018/11/22/us-missionary-killed-tribespeople-north-sentinel-island-vpx.cnn TIMELINE 1m:30s Why is digital technology still such a pain in the ass? 2m:40s Stu's weekend with the baby 7m:00s Thailand's most underrated tourist attraction 11m:51s Fake farang jewelry store robber update 14m:30s The most exciting police chase ever 31m:23s That Thai news cycle 33m:12s The Christian missionary killed on forbidden island

South Park or Family Guy: which is the superior animated series? Will a Thai man who dressed up as a white guy and robbed a jewelry store get off scott-free? Why is Fahrenheit 11/9 such a flaming pile of hot garbage? These and all your other questions, answered at last, on this week's Barseholes Podcast!

What happens to one's fashion sense after multiple years living in Asia? Why were Japanese WW2 soldiers still fighting decades after Japan's surrender? Are the end times upon us? These, and all your other questions, answered at last, on this week's edition of the Barseholes Podcast!

What is "begpacking" and why does it piss off expats so damn much? Are other people worth listening to at all? Why is Elon Musk taking on the Mexican tequila industry? These and other burning questions, answered at last on this week's Barseholes podcast!

Enough about Thailand. Stu's buddy Pete stops by to talk about what life is really like for the expats who choose to call Korea home. Also: Is Elon Musk a bad person? Is racism alive and well in Asia? What does Scotty Pippin's gigantic penis have to say about all this? All these questions and more answered on this week's Barseholes Podcast!

Thailand is legalizing medical marijuana! Can a severe bout of food poisoning, a Facebook-induced panic attack, and a ridiculously long wait for the new season of Game of Thrones dampen Stu and Brett's spirits during this momentous time?

Will people in thailand walk to 7-11, or have 7-11 come to them? What ever happened to Nicky Bullets? What's it like driving in Thailand on a regular basis? Why don't people get to work 4 days each week? All these burning questions get answered at last in this week's Barseholes podcast!

The amazing story of one man's clumsy journey from drunken obscurity to the very heights of graffiti artist fame and Thailand villainy. Was Scouser Lee just a drunk moron who stumbled upon a can of spraypaint at exactly the wrong time, or is there more to this sordid tale than meets the eye?

Because the people demanded it, after a long traveling hiatus the Barseholes Podcast is back. This week we look at what it's like taking a long trip "home" with a baby in tow. While Stu has been distracted managing a baby on his trip around the world, the world of politics has been getting grimmer. Can Elon Musk save us from ourselves?

What do friendships look like once you've graduated to your mid-thirties? How the hell does it work? While we're at it, how do visits home change as one lives abroad for longer and longer periods of time? Also, what's the story with Facebook's updated newsfeed? These and other burning questions get answered on this week's exciting edition of the Barseholes podcast...

Is social media really "social" anymore? Which of our life goals have we had to accept we are now too old and useless to accomplish? Also: Elon Musk vs the hero cave divers. All this and more on another exciting edition of the Barseholes podcast!

You know those moments when life's little frustrations and difficulties pile up to the point where you just snap? Well, Brett stands right on the cusp. What will it take to push him over the edge?

Stu and Brett are feeling philosophical. Why? Because Stu just had his first child, and Brett almost died. Journey into the minds of your venerable hosts as they explore life, death, and their favourite sci-fi film franchises.

How did Brett and Stu convince their significant others to allow a podcast to be recorded? How strong is a cardboard desk, really? Is ASMR for weirdos? What happens when ants meet Roombas? Why do the Gods always come to eath and bang our women? So many burning questions answered at last!

How will Brett's girlfriend react when he clumsily knocks his glass to the floor? Are celebrities likenesses fair game for the AI porn industry? Which Street Fighter character's secret move would be the handiest in everyday life? Is anyone listening to this? These and other burning questions, answered at last, in this week's Barseholes podcast!

If you are considering flying to Thailand, then stealing a car whilst sleeping, if you think monkeys are cute, or if you think you can leave your murderous criminal past behind and start a new life in Thailand, Brett and Stu have some news for you. You shouldn't, they aren't, and you can't (for long).

Is it possible to prepare and/or enjoy the cuisine of other cultures without appropriating that culture? Should people with dark penises be whitening them to make them look more appealing? What kinds of numbers is Pornhub putting up these days? All these burning questions (and a few more) will be answered in this, the first ever episode of the Barseholes Podcast!