Voices About Living

Join Valerie and Nathan this week as they break down the phenomena of “The Magical Other”…the desire each of us has to find the right person [or job, church, community…choose your favorite quick fix solution]. which will make all of our troubles go away.  And how this NEVER works and actually poisons the potential of […]

In this second episode of this two part series, Valerie brings on special guest and fellow therapist Jessica Ginther to talk about the value of the Internal Family Systems model of therapy as a model for helping people come to know themselves better. In

In this second episode of this two part series, Valerie brings on special guest and fellow therapist Jessica Ginther to talk about the value of the Internal Family Systems model of therapy as a model for helping people come to know themselves better. In this series Valerie and Jessica talk about how all human beings […]

In this two part series, Valerie brings on special guest and fellow therapist Jessica Ginther to talk about the value of the Internal Family Systems model of therapy as a model for helping people come to know themselves better. In this series Valerie and Jessica talk about how all human beings are innately whole and […]

We are social creatures…there is no getting around it. Almost without exception, the theme of our suffering is other people. And the way to work through this suffering is through exploring these struggles with other people who can show us support, affirmation, and a reflection of our ability to overcome. In this episode Valerie and […]

Join Valerie and guest co-host Jill Dickey as they break down a “real life” case study in relational burnout that was shared in Valerie’s weekly international online growth community that tackles issues of burnout that often comes from the complexities of parenting young adult children. In this episode Valerie and Jill use Terry Real’s 5 […]

In this episode, join Valerie and guest co-host Jill Dickey as they break down the flip side of Author Terry Real’s famous “5 Losing Strategies in Relationships” (see episode 156) as this week they hit the 5 WINNING STRATEGIES for all relationships! Not only do they break down each strategy, but they give specific examples […]

In this fun episode, Valerie and Nathan walk you through Terry Real’s 5 “LOSING STRATEGIES” that are bound to get you in trouble in your most complicated relationship. As Val and Nathan have been married going on 25 years, they know a thing or two about which strategies have gotten their relationship in the worst […]

In this episode (and the next several episodes) Valerie is going to go deeply into burnout and how you can better understand and deal with your toughest relationships. Val and Nathan will look at a variety of relationships that might be your most challenging–from intimate relationship to your relationship with your small children, adult children, […]

In this final episode on this burnout series focused on the concept of FLOW, Valerie and Nathan answer podcast listener questions about the correlation between flow and burnout. They address FLOW and energy centers of our body and how burnout is essentially a blockage in more or more of our body’s energy centers. They also […]

Join Valerie and Nathan in this deepening of the topic of FLOW as the state of heightened enjoyment, unselfconsciousness, concentration, and peace that is evidence that one is living a life that is alive, awake and thriving. FLOW is the opposite of burnout and if you want to heal from your struggle with all areas […]

Join Valerie and Nathan in this deepening of the topic of FLOW as the state of heightened enjoyment, unselfconsciousness, concentration, and peace that is evidence that one is living a life that is alive, awake and thriving. FLOW is the opposite of burno

In this episode Valerie jumps into the topic of meditation as the ABSOLUTELY mandatory key to finding peace in our journey out of burnout and into a life that is finally peaceful, meaningful, and purposeful. Here is a sad truth: most of us are kept hostage all day every day by our “neurotic roommate” (yes, […]

Join Valerie in her exploration of burnout’s opposite: The experience of FLOW. In this podcast Valerie answers several podcast audience questions about FLOW…what is it? How do I know I am having a “flow” experience? What can I do in my life to learn how to feel this way? Why do some people feel this […]

What is FLOW? FLOW is a state of being when mind and body are totally attuned, in sync, present, and exhilarated in a task. FLOW is the opposite of burnout and it is this month’s Generation Xhausted focus in your burnout recovery journey. In this week’s episode, Val and Nathan set the stage by breaking […]

In this work burnout podcast Val and Nathan talk about the difference between a job that “pays the bills” and a vocation that truly lights us up and why so many of us struggles following the path to a vocation that not only pays the bills but also provides ourselves and the world deep and […]

Join Val and Nathan as they talk about how work often is the setting where stress arises and our own insecurities, eccentricities, and blindspots show up in often uncomfortable and potentially enlightening ways. In this episode they use the personality assessment tool the Enneagram to talk about how we each might be able to self-diagnose […]

Join Val and Nathan as they talk about how work often is the setting where stress arises and our own insecurities, eccentricities, and blindspots show up in often uncomfortable and potentially enlightening ways. In this episode they use the personality a

Some people hate their work and this is stressful. Some people like their work but are marinating in stress just the same for a variety of reasons. Join therapist Valerie Hamaker as she breaks down chronic stress and its impact on the body and how to work through your own stress to prevent illness, premature […]

Some people hate their work and this is stressful. Some people like their work but are marinating in stress just the same for a variety of reasons. Join therapist Valerie Hamaker as she breaks down chronic stress and its impact on the body and how to wor

In this week’s burnout discovery and healing conversation, Valerie talks to two incredibly brave people who share how complex childhood dynamics impacted them and still impact them, and most importantly, how they are each actively working on healing and growing. Listen as these guests share their stories 1. Being the “golden child” born shortly after […]

In this episode, Valerie interviews three sisters each have their share of tender moments realizing how very much the sibling relationship shaped each of their very identities. We talk about dynamics of oldest, middle, and functional youngest daughters and how these decades-spanning relationships are key to our own self-knowing and self-healing.

Join Val and Nathan as they share some personal reflections on how their own birth order relationships inform each of their unique brand of crazy! In this episode they demonstrate how you too can unpack the impact of your birth order in what makes you tick and also what keeps you stuck.

Join Valerie in this new series on burnout and sibling relationships. In this primer episode, Val shares some findings about the typical traits of the first born, middle children, last born, and only children along with accompanying strengths and weaknesses. This series is sure to awaken in you more curiosity about how you “tick” and […]

Oh please don't miss this episode everyone! This will be an hour of pure gold where I gathered 8 individuals and together we each “rep our enneagram number” and discuss a myriad of topics like “what is your defining feature within

Oh please don’t miss this episode everyone! This will be an hour of pure gold where I gathered 8 individuals and together we each “rep our enneagram number” and discuss a myriad of topics like “what is your defining feature within your number?”, “what is your greatest vulnerability?”, “which relationship has been impacted the most […]

In this fabulous episode, Valerie is joined by fellow therapist, friend, and expert in the enneagram. Their topic? How the enneagram is a tool for relationship help! And they are talking about EVERY RELATIONSHIP, starting with one with ourselves and extending out to intimate partners, parentings, children, and co-worker. Listen to this podcast to understand […]

Join Nathan and Val in this playful conversation where they illustrate how we all manage stress differently through something we all know plenty about–the Covid 19. In this episode they run through each enneagram number and talk about how each type might have handled everything from shelter in place, to masks, to social distancing in […]

Join Valerie and Nathan as they open up a new conversation about how to heal from your own burnout…this series focuses on the ENNEAGRAM…a personality assessment tool that may very well change the way to view self and others…waking you up to your own blindspots. (Blindspots=Burnout!) This week is a primer on each enneagram number […]

Join Valerie and guest Jill Dickey, therapist-in-training and community member of Generation Xhausted Online Community, as they dig into a fellow GenX community member’s personal question about her own intimate sexual relationship with her partner that complex, overwhelming, and, yes, exhausting her. Learn about sex in a way that is likely totally new to you.

Why is making and keeping boundaries so hard? Because these struggles are wired into our brains at a very young age. In this episode, Val and Nathan share many of their own boundary ‘aha’ moments in their marriage an how they have grown in realizing that good boundaries make good relationships in every area of […]

Join Valerie and Nathan in this two part series about boundaries and how life is sucked from us when we don’t make them with ourselves and others. In these episodes, Val and Nathan talk about boundaries and how we are vulnerable to certain boundary weaknesses due to childhood. They also talk about why making boundaries […]

Join Valerie and her fellow online community manager Jillian as they talk about how online support, education, and interest communities are a few clicks away from help, friendship, healing, and growth. Valerie runs an online mental health and burnout recovery space and Jillian runs space to support and connect entrepreneurs world wide. They both are […]

Join Valerie as she hears the larger story of Generation Xhausted Community Member Andee, who shares how this community has been the ideal experience for her as it has helped her feel the connection, camaraderie, and support that has validated just how far she has come in her own healing journey. In this episode Val […]

Join Valerie as she shares some pretty amazing stories about how a few people came in with pervasive stressors (generalized anxiety and hypervigilence, intimate relationship issues, and issues of boundaries and self respect at work) and how together we learned how to tackle their chronic burnout with trauma therapy. These first hand accounts can be […]

Join Valerie and her lovely assistant Nathan as they talk about the how feeling chronically burned out (overwhelmed, perpetually exhausted) might be connected to a history of unresolved childhood trauma. In this and the previous episode, Valerie puts on her trauma therapist hat and walks you through all things childhood trauma and why those with […]

Join Valerie and her lovely assistant Nathan as they talk about the how feeling chronically burned out (overwhelmed, perpetually exhausted) might be connected to a history of unresolved childhood trauma. In this and the following episodes, Valerie puts on her trauma therapist hat and walks you through all things childhood trauma. Join her and Nathan […]

Join Valerie as she spends a few minutes in conversation with Lark, a member of her burnout recovery community who has jumped into her own growth journey “with both feet”. What motivated her to finally take this step? Compassion fatigue at work, the need to better understand the wounds she had received as a woman […]

Join Val and Nathan as they share stories about how relationships with intimate partners, friends, and authority figures can teach us volumes about our shadow selves. They walk through 3 final questions that we can ask ourselves about our most important relationships to learn about our shadow selves and potentially become healthier and more fulfilled […]

Join Valerie and Nathan as they banter about all things burnout recovery and spiritual development. In this SHADOW series, they talk about 3 of 6 questions we can ask ourselves to learn about our shadow…that part of our identity that we deny or pretend does not exist. These first three questions have to do with […]

In this episode Valerie and Nathan define burnout as the ultimate outcome of not knowing ourselves and then living accordingly. How to overcome? Well, for starters, lets accept that there are parts of ourselves that we don’t exactly like and then we spend a lot of time and energy hiding and trying to forget about […]

In this episode, Valerie breaks down her own methodology of how she works with individuals in their burnout recovery journey. Through countless hours of clinical work with people she has created a predictable path to healing infusing psychology, trauma recovery techniques, and spirituality elements. This is a mind/body/soul healing journey that has helped many. AND […]

Are you lit up by your own spiritual practices, study, traditions? No? Why not? Because guess what? As grown ups, WE are responsible for our own relationships (including our relationship with the divine and any institutions that might be trying to facilitation our relationship with the divine) and if they are not lighting us up, […]

Val and Nathan here for you as you are navigating the complicated moments around saying “yes” and saying “no” to extended family expectations. We are the first to admit that this is touchy but also feel that staying true to ourselves and staying in close and loving connection with loved ones is possible!

Join Valerie and Mary, a member of her new membership community as they talk about Mary’s experience doing one-one-one coaching work around her struggles to give and give.  And give.  This feels noble, right?  Well…with some exploration, Val and Mary realized that Mary gives because she is trying to prove herself–to everyone.  And she gives […]

Join Valerie and Nathan as they break down four possible origins for depression and how each of these kinds of depression have impacted them personally.  They also talk about how and why depression especially impacts many of us during holidays or other “anniversary” times of the year, and what to do if/when you are feeling […]

In this episode, Valerie is guest of therapist Geoff Steurer, host of the podcast “From Crisis to Connection” and they talk about how Val's view of burnout is extremely timely and very unique.  From Val's perspective, burnout come

In this episode, Valerie is guest of therapist Geoff Steurer, host of the podcast “From Crisis to Connection” and they talk about how Val’s view of burnout is extremely timely and very unique.  From Val’s perspective, burnout comes from a lost relationship with ones one inner divine, a part of each of us that is […]

In this week’s episode, Valerie and Nathan talk about 3 typical midlife professional burnout paths. They then talk about the atypical [and optimal] path to career and personal development that prevents midlife burnout. Of course this conversation is only half of the story. As men cannot give birth, (whether we like it or not) their […]

Join Valerie and Nathan this week as they break down the phenomena of “The Magical Other”…the desire each of us has to find the right person [or job, church, community…choose your favorite quick fix solution]. which will make all

Join Valerie and Nathan this week as they break down the phenomena of “The Magical Other”…the desire each of us has to find the right person [or job, church, community…choose your favorite quick fix solution]. which will make all