Podcasts about therapists

Have you ever caught yourself thinking, "I should be over this by now"? Maybe an old fear or insecurity shows up, and instead of just feeling it, you feel bad about feeling that way. Most of us were taught that hard feelings — shame, envy, anger, boredom — are problems to be solved or character flaws to fix. And when they don't go away, we pile on a second layer of distress. But my guest today says that's exactly where we go wrong. The goal isn't to get rid of hard feelings. It's to get more curious about them. My guest is Daniel Smith, a writer turned therapist whose new book is called Hard Feelings. Some of the things we discuss are: Why hard feelings aren't problems to solve — and what happens when you stop trying to optimize them away Why shame is the master uncomfortable emotion, and how it often gets passed down through families in silence The trap of asking "why do I feel this way?" — and the better question that actually helps Why decades of personal work doesn't make old anxieties disappear The hidden cost of the positivity industry — and how well-meaning advice can become unintentionally shaming What boredom, envy, and even anger are trying to teach you if you're willing to listen The difference between sitting with a feeling and needing to shift one — and how to know which moment calls for which The Therapist's Take: My top three strategies for getting curious about hard feelings starting today Related Episodes ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 224 - 8 Myths About Feelings That Can Sabotage Your Emotional Intelligence ⁠148 — How to Take Charge of Your Feelings Links & Resources Hard Feelings Connect with the Show Buy a copy of⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Connect with Amy on Instagram —⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@AmyMorinAuthor⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Visit my website —⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠AmyMorinLCSW.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Sponsors Helix Sleep —Go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠helixsleep.com/STRONGER⁠⁠⁠⁠ to get 20% off sitewide   AirDoctor — Head to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠AirDoctorPro.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠and use promo code STRONGER to get UP TO $300 off today! One Skin — Go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠oneskin.co/STRONGER⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and use code stronger to get up to 30% off your first 3 subscription orders Quince — Go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Quince.com/stronger⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns! Flamingo — Get a $7 starter set at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ShopFlamingo.com/STRONGER⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Subscribe to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Mentally Stronger Premium⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for exclusive content like weekly bonus episodes, mental strength challenges, and office hours with me. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Join the  Uplift Community App  TODAY!    If you've ever talked yourself out of something you really wanted, told yourself it wasn't the right time, or felt guilty for even wanting it, this episode is going to feel like a long exhale. Therapist Niro Feliciano is back for Part 2, and we go deep into what it actually costs women when they stop investing in themselves, why women over 40 are sitting on the best years of their lives, and the simple mental shift that makes it possible to finally say yes to yourself without the guilt spiral. We also talk about social media, self‑promotion, and the real reason most women won't put themselves out there. Hint: it's not what you think. Niro brings clinical insight. I bring the Disney World story and a strong opinion about cringe.   What You'll Learn in This Episode: What it costs a family long-term when the mother is the only one who doesn't invest in herself Why trying new things is directly connected to cognitive health, brain development, and joy How humility and confidence can coexist (the C.S. Lewis definition that will change how you think about showing up) The real fear behind social media self-promotion and how to do a cost-benefit analysis on it Why "climbing Cringe Mountain" might be the most important thing you do for your calling this year What perimenopause actually does for your ability to stop people-pleasing Why your 40s and 50s are not the beginning of the end   Timestamps: (00:52) - What it costs a family when mom is the only one not being invested in  (01:11) - The modeling problem: what your kids are learning by watching you  (02:00) - Maintaining your identity beyond being a mother and partner  (02:41) - Why trying new things matters more than we think  (04:04) - The brain science behind learning new things (and Niro's hatchet throwing story)  (06:18) - Why Alli takes clients to Disney World twice a year  (08:15) - The Mother's Day vs. Father's Day double standard nobody talks about  (08:57) - What to say to the woman who has no real reason not to invest in herself  (09:43) - The permission exercise: what would you say to a woman you love?  (18:36) - C.S. Lewis on humility, and why it changes everything about social media  (17:57) - The common roadblock for Christian women who want to build a business  (20:16) - The real fear behind not wanting to post (it's not self-promotion)  (20:47) - How to do a cost-benefit analysis on putting yourself out there  (22:33) - Climbing Cringe Mountain: the cost of admission for doing anything that matters 23:56 - What it costs a family when mom is the only one not being invested in (23:26) - Rapid-fire wrap-up: Niro's current favorites    Links to great things we discussed:  Niro's Website NIro's TV Recommendation - Love Story Niro's Book Recommendation - Strangers Niro's Product Recommendation - SkinCeuticals C E Ferulic Function Health Uplift App Wise Woman Era Alli on YouTube   I hope you loved this episode!

Learn how to JournalSpeak⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.yourbreakawake.com/journalspeak ⁠⁠The first day I saw Sean's face was on a group post to our private JournalSpeak FB community. He was excited and proud that he could do the splits again (I couldn't do them with all the JournalSpeak in the world) and he wanted to share. I was immediately taken by Sean's lovely energy and dedication to the work. I'm so excited to finally speak with him on the pod. Join us for a conversation that will most definitely help you to drop into your own TMS work more deeply and meaningfully. ⁠⁠⁠1:1 COACHING WITH TRAINED COACHES SUPERVISED DIRECTLY BY NICOLE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠PLEASE RATE AND REVIEW THE PODCAST HERE TO HELP OTHERS FIND IT!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Producer: Lisa Eisenpresser ~~~~~ SUPPORT:

Melissa breaks down concerns about the Valley. If you feel the show has been dark but don't know why, YBT explains the problematic psychology under the surface. TW: Discussion of SA and DV Melissa also discusses the premiere of Next Gen NYC before giving a brief personal update at the end. Mental health, psychology, manipulation, and addiction are discussed throughout. THANK YOU FOR LISTENING and for all the support!Please follow Your Bish Therapist podcast; please give a 5-star comment & rating (it really helps!) Please follow @yourbishtherapist on Instagram, YouTube, Patreon, and FB.For full video (ad free, early release, full video & bonus content) visit YBT Patreon, Spreaker Supporters Club or YouTubePatreon (Ad Free, Early Release, Full Video, Bonus Content) https://patreon.com/YourBishTherapist?utm_medium=unknown&utm_source=join_link&utm_campaign=creatorshare_creator&utm_content=copyLinkApple Podcast (Ad Free): https://apple.co/3MfskzeSpreaker Supporters club (Ad Free, Early Release):  https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/your-bish-therapist--6065109/supportYouTube (Full Video): https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCu8bmVPTlWANg5v7rGRJjow?subconfirmation=1To find links to all YBT content: https://linktr.ee/yourbishtherapistBrand Ambassador: www.Iamhumanthebrand.com for clothing with a purpose. Code BISH20 for 20% off purchaseDisclaimer: Posts are not intended to diagnose, treat or provide medical advice. Your Bish Therapist (YBT) is for entertainment and informational purposes only. The podcast, my opinions, and posts, are my own and are not associated with past or present employers, any organizations, Bravo TV, Grey Heart productions or any other television network. The information in YBT podcast and on its its social media is provided for general informational purposes only and is not intended to diagnose or treat. Please do not act or refrain from acting based on anything you read, see, or hear on YBT, podcast or associated social media. Communicating with YBT via email, and/or social media does not form a therapeutic alliance. Melissa, operator of YBT, is unable to provide any therapeutic advice, treatment or feedback.

What goes on at the neurobiological level that makes someone more vulnerable to self-injure or self-harm? What biological risk factors are at play? What roles do the vagus nerve, cortisol levels, and hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal (HPA) axis have? We hope to discuss the psychology of self-injury pain in a future episode, but in this episode, Dr. Michael Kaess from the University of Bern in Switzerland explains the neurobiology of self-injury in simple terms, or what we hope can be considered simple layman's terms.  Learn more about Dr. Kaess and his research team at the Universitäre Psychiatrische Dienste (UPD) in Bern here. To participate in Dr. Kaess' research study of an online intervention for self-injury (in German), visit the STAR (Self-injury Treatment Assessment Recovery) Project at https://star-projekt.de/. Below are links to some of the research referenced in this episode: Kaess, M., Hooley, J. M., Klimes-Dougan, B., Koenig, J., Plener, P. L., Reichl, C., Robinson, K., Schmahl, C., Sicorello, M., Schreiner, M. W., & Cullen, K. R. (2021). Advancing a temporal framework for understanding the biology of nonsuicidal self-injury: An expert review. Neuroscience and Biobehavioral Reviews, 130, 228-239. Reichl, C., Heyer, A., Brunner, R., Parzer, P., Völker, J. M., Resch, R., & Kaess, M. (2016). Hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal axis, childhood adversity and adolescent nonsuicidal self-injury. Psychoneuroendocrinology, 74, 203-211. Plener, P. L., Bubalo, N., Fladung, A. K., Ludolph, A. G., & Lulé, D. (2012). Prone to excitement: Adolescent females with non-suicidal self-injury (NSSI) show altered cortical pattern to emotional and NSS-related material. Psychiatry Research, 203(2-3), 146-152. Follow Dr. Westers on Instagram @DocWesters. To join ISSS, visit itriples.org and follow ISSS on Facebook and X/Twitter (@ITripleS). The Psychology of Self-Injury podcast has been rated #5 by Feedspot in their "Best 20 Clinical Psychology Podcasts" and by Welp Magazine in their "20 Best Injury Podcasts."

April Lancit.

April Lancit.

Today's encore is on what therapists often get wrong about selling their first online course, considering all the assumptions we make and the misconceptions we hold about online courses. I'm bringing full transparency to today's topic as I share what I've learned through my years of experience with online courses. You'll Learn:The guilt loop running in my head (“I became a therapist to help people, not to sell things.”)Mindset shift that made it all make sense to meEthical selling: a path to transformation with deep care and clarity3 sales mistakes therapists make—and what to do instead:Thinking “sales equals sleazing”Think of aligned sales as clear communication with a gentle and generous invitation.Avoiding the “ask” entirelyIf someone is clearly interested, don't make them guess how to work with you. Give them a clear call-to-action.Not believing in the value of your courseYour confidence comes from alignment. Focus on the transformation you can offer.---Ready to launch (or grow) your online course?Haven is our membership for therapists who want to turn their expertise into sustainable online income through courses, content, and simple systems that actually work.Our next Accelerator, Building Authoritative Guides That Stand Out In The Age of AI, begins soon.Learn more here: https://melvinvarghese.kartra.com/page/july2026

What if the biggest challenge in your relationships isn't finding the right person, but understanding the person doing the choosing? This week on QUESTION EVERYTHING, relationship therapist and bestselling author Vienna Pharaon joins Danielle to unpack the hidden wounds that shape our dating lives, relationships, and marriages. From the five core origin wounds we all carry to the surprising reason we keep repeating the same patterns, Vienna explains how childhood experiences quietly influence who we're attracted to, what we tolerate, and why some relationships feel impossible to leave. Together, they explore the difference between chemistry and compatibility, why awareness alone isn't enough to create change, how emotional maturity transforms relationships, and the questions healthy couples ask that most people avoid. Plus, Vienna shares her thoughts on modern dating, reality TV relationships, betrayal, healing, and the one question everyone should ask themselves about their childhood. In this episode, you’ll also learn: Why Vienna believes most relationship problems start long before we meet our partners The five core wounds shaping your dating patterns, relationships, and marriage How childhood experiences influence who you're attracted to and why you stay The surprising reason we often choose familiarity over healthy love Why awareness alone isn't enough to break unhealthy relationship patterns How to identify whether you're choosing someone from love or from a wound The hidden connection between shame, emotional immaturity, and defensiveness Why people-pleasing and shape-shifting can sabotage your relationships How childhood attachment wounds show up in dating and long-term partnerships Why emotionally mature couples handle conflict differently The relationship questions healthy couples ask that most people avoid Vienna's take on Love Island, Love Is Blind, and what reality dating shows reveal about modern relationships Why "if they wanted to, they would" isn't always true Vienna weighs in on Kylie Jenner and Timothée Chalamet's romance and why she thinks they’ll last The one childhood question that could completely change how you understand yourself and your relationships Make sure to check out Vienna’s book The Origins of You, and follow her on Instagram @mindfulmft See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

April Lancit.

Join host Michele Forto as she discusses Therapy Dogs in Mental Health Practice, What Therapists Need to Know on Dog Works Radio. Other Episodes You Will Love ·      Zombie Dogs Support the Show This episode was recorded on the Shure SM7B and a Rodecaster Pro II Like this episode? Share it with your dog training friends! Love this episode? Say thanks in true dog training podcasting style by leaving a review. FREE! Grab our 7-Day Real-World Dog Training Plan Take our Understanding Drive Behaviors quiz to see exactly what drive your dog is in and how to begin to train for it. Join the On-Air Dog Training Coaching waitlist for a chance to be coached on the air by Dr. Robert or Michele Forto and get your dog training questions answered in real time. Sign up now for 20% off our Group Coaching Program and learn how to build the best relationship possible for your dog. Take your dog training to the next level by enrolling in our Peak Performance membership. Follow Dog Works Radio for more dog training tips: Facebook | Instagram | LinkedIn   ©2009-2026 by Dog Works Training Company® All Rights Reserved.

Dr. Kirk Honda interviews Mia Chard about surviving abuse at the hands of therapist Maurice Harker, who was later convicted. As Mia recounts her experience, Kirk discusses the betrayal of trust involved in therapist abuse and why stories like hers leave him enraged. June 24, 2026This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/KIRK to get 10% off your first month.Support us by... Become a member: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOUZWV1DRtHtpP2H48S7iiw/joinBecome a patron: https://www.patreon.com/PsychologyInSeattleContact us/more info... Email: https://www.psychologyinseattle.com/contactAbout Dr. Kirk: https://www.psychologyinseattle.com/about-dr-kirk-hondaWebsite: https://www.psychologyinseattle.comGet stuff... Merch: https://psychologyinseattle-shop.fourthwall.com/KIRKgram (like Cameo): https://www.psychologyinseattle.com/kirkgramThe Psychology In Seattle Podcast ®Trigger Warning: This episode may include topics such as assault, trauma, and discrimination. If necessary, listeners are encouraged to refrain from listening and care for their safety and well-being. Disclaimer: The content provided is for educational, informational, and entertainment purposes only. Nothing here constitutes personal or professional consultation, therapy, diagnosis, or creates a counselor-client relationship. Topics discussed may generate differing points of view. If you participate (by being a guest, submitting a question, or commenting) you must do so with the knowledge that we cannot control reactions or responses from others, which may not agree with you or feel unfair. Your participation on this site is at your own risk, accepting full responsibility for any liability or harm that may result. Anything you write here may be used for discussion or endorsement of the podcast. Opinions and views expressed by the host and guest hosts are personal views. Although we take precautions and fact check, they should not be considered facts and the opinions may change. Opinions posted by participants (such as comments) are not those of the hosts. Readers should not rely on any information found here and should perform due diligence before taking any action. For a more extensive description of factors for you to consider, please see www.psychologyinseattle.com

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How can therapists avoid the "diagnosis-as-identity" trap with neurodivergent clients?  Working with autistic clients can feel incomplete at times. Newer clinicians or those who aren't neurodivergent may struggle with the dynamics of this unique client/therapist alliance, even as they collaborate on issues related to relationships and empathy. But one autistic psychotherapist and Mayo Clinic researcher urges trauma-informed therapists to stick with this population. He notes that the tools they already use with neurotypical people can also support neurodivergent clients, building capacity for deeper explorations of identity, behavior, and connection in a non-pathologizing environment.  Host Emily Ruth welcomes Dr. Sean Inderbitzen, DSW, LCSW, a psychotherapist, researcher, and author who has dedicated his practice to advancing autism therapy through innovative, evidence-based approaches. The conversation explores ways clinicians can help neurodivergent clients avoid the "diagnosis-as-identity" trap, focusing instead on what is within their control. And finally, Sean guides our audience through a simple yet effective practice for reclaiming a sense of safety and well-being during periods of dysregulation. Transforming Trauma is grateful to Sean for sharing his experiential point of view and for preparing our audience to better support the neurodivergent community.  To read the full show notes and discover more resources, visit https://complextraumatrainingcenter.com/transformingtrauma SPACE: SPACE is an Inner Development Program of Support and Self-Discovery for Therapists on the Personal, Interpersonal, and Transpersonal Levels offered by the Complex Trauma Training Center. This experiential learning program offers an immersive group experience designed to cultivate space for self-care, community support, and deepening vitality in our professional role as therapists. Learn more about how to join. *** The Complex Trauma Training Center: https://complextraumatrainingcenter.com View upcoming trainings: https://complextraumatrainingcenter.com/schedule/ Join us for this a transformative 2-day Intro to NARM® online workshop: https://bit.ly/narmintro *** The Complex Trauma Training Center (CTTC) is a professional organization providing clinical training, education, consultation, and mentorship for psychotherapists and mental health professionals working with individuals and communities impacted by Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) and Complex Trauma (C-PTSD). CTTC provides NARM® Therapist and NARM® Master Therapist Training programs, as well as ongoing monthly groups in support of those learning NARM. CTTC offers a depth-oriented professional community for those seeking a supportive network of therapists focused on three levels of shared human experience: personal, interpersonal & transpersonal. The Transforming Trauma podcast embodies the spirit of CTTC – best described by its three keywords: depth, connection, and heart - and offers guidance to those interested in effective, transformational trauma-informed care. We want to connect with you! Facebook @complextraumatrainingcenter Instagram @cttc_training LinkedIn YouTube

For the 100th episode of For Your Listening Pleasure, fashion stylist and founder of The Clothing Therapist, Dana Asher Levine, shares her remarkable journey of resilience, reinvention, and finding purpose through life's biggest challenges.Known for styling some of Hollywood's most influential women, including a decades-long professional relationship with television powerhouse Shonda Rhimes, Dana has built a career helping women feel confident, authentic, and empowered through personal style. But behind her success is a story of profound loss, perseverance, and rebuilding. After losing both of her parents at a young age and later navigating divorce while raising three children, Dana found herself starting over at 40 and creating a business that would ultimately transform the lives of countless women.In this heartfelt conversation, Dana opens up about grief, motherhood, entrepreneurship, finding love again, and the lessons she's learned from helping women show up as their best selves. She also shares behind-the-scenes stories from Hollywood, her approach to personal style, and why confidence has always been more important than following trends.Episode Resources:Follow Dana on InstagramThe Clothing Therapist WebsiteLink to purchase:FYLPxTracee Badway Merch CollaborationFYLPxWRDSMTH Merch Collaboration*suggestion is to size upDownload this episode of For Your Listening Pleasure wherever you get your podcasts! Make sure you follow us on Instagram @foryourlisteningpleasureClick here to listen to the For Your Listening Pleasure Theme Song Playlist on Spotify.To continue the conversation, feel free to DM me at https://www.instagram.com/foryourlisteningpleasure/ or email me at foryourlisteningpleasure@gmail.com.

What if your next high-paying client finds you through AI before they ever visit your website? In this episode, I share a personal experience that completely reinforced what I've been teaching therapists about marketing and visibility. After deciding to invest in an EMDR intensive for myself, I turned to ChatGPT to help me find a provider.  What happened next revealed just how dramatically the client journey is changing. I walk you through the search process, the differences between the practices I contacted, and why some therapists are getting recommended while others are being overlooked. This conversation explores what AI search means for private practice owners and why the traditional marketing playbook may not be enough moving forward. Topics Covered in This Episode: 4:18 - The unexpected experiment that changed how I think about therapist marketing 7:42 - Why one practice earned my attention before I ever spoke to a clinician 9:55 - The client behavior shift that therapists can no longer afford to ignore 12:07 - A simple question every private practice owner should ask themselves right now 14:31 - The surprising places AI is pulling recommendations from 16:48 - A marketing advantage many therapists are overlooking 18:52 - The reason niche practices may have an edge in AI search 20:36 - The trust signals that could influence who gets recommended and who doesn't If you're looking to get help with making sure your practice is showing up in ChatGPT this year, join me for my one-time, live workshop on Tuesday, June 30th at 12PM Et/ 9AM Pt. A recording will be provided if you're away during that time.   You'll learn my 3- Hour Weekly Marketing Framework. In just one hour together, we'll demystify what to actually focus on: Map out exactly how to spend 3 focused hours a week on marketing (so it doesn't take over your life) Learn the priority order: foundation, content, then community signals Walk through real examples of therapists doing this well Resources Mentioned: Simple SEO + AIO for therapists: https://danielle-s-school8.teachable.com/p/seo-workshop

A late autism diagnosis can reframe everything you thought you knew about why your work, your relationships, and even your own field have felt harder than they should. For Marina Livis, that reframe arrived after years of being told she was too literal, too this, too that, with no one stopping to ask why.In this episode of The Traveling Therapist Podcast, I sit down with Marina to talk about what came after she was finally diagnosed, the licensing hurdles she refused to let stop her, and how all of it shaped the niche she serves now. We also get into the insurance mess so many traveling therapists are sorting through right now, and why she is rethinking how she wants to run her practice.In This Episode, We Explore…The long-distance relationship that quietly kicked off her traveling therapist journey.What being called "too literal" actually looked like on the job.The evaluation that was supposed to help her and ended up doing the opposite.Signs of autism in women that often slip right under the radar.Why she is stepping back from insurance platforms and panels.Connect with Marina Livis:Website: https://www.marinawellness.comBook a consultation button on her site (routes through her EHR)Kym's Resources:Bill Like a Boss: https://kymtolson.kartra.com/page/Bill-Like-A-Boss100 Side Hustles for Therapists: https://kymtolson.kartra.com/page/opt-in-100-side-hustlesThera AI Hub: https://kymtolson.kartra.com/page/AI-Tools-for-TherapistsCoaching with Kym: https://calendly.com/kymtolson/30minThe Traveling Therapist Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/onlineandtravelingAre you ready to take the plunge and become a Traveling Therapist? Whether you want to be a full-time digital nomad or just want the flexibility to bring your practice with you while you travel a couple of times a year, the Portable Practice Method will give you the framework to be protected! ➡️ JOIN NOW: www.portablepracticemethod.com/Connect with me:www.instagram.com/thetravelingtherapist_kymwww.facebook.com/groups/onlineandtraveling/www.thetravelingtherapist.comThe Traveling Therapist Podcast is Sponsored by:Berries: Say goodbye to the burden of mental health notes with automated note and treatment plan creation! www.heyberries.com/therapistsAlma: Alma is on a mission to simplify access to mental health care by focusing first and foremost on supporting clinicians www.helloalma.com/kym

Memorizing protocols might help you pass a test, but it won't help you think through real patient cases. I'll explain why true confidence in hand therapy comes from understanding principles and developing strong clinical reasoning—not just following a protocol.

Zach sits down with Eli, a therapist, podcast host, and author, and his wife Ariella, a registered dietitian, for an honest look at what it actually takes to build a good marriage, not the sanitized version you'd expect from someone with a therapy practice and a book on relationships, but the real one. Seven weeks from welcoming their third child, living in Las Vegas with two kids already in tow, this couple brings both credentials and candor to a conversation about the daily, unglamorous work of staying close.The conversation covers the full terrain: how they define a good day versus a bad one, the specific argument that sent Ariella to two books in one week, the way Eli's ADHD reshapes how they communicate and how Ariella has had to rewire her instinct to simply fix or suppress conflict, and what they have learned after 11 years of marriage and counting. Eli is refreshingly unguarded about the fact that knowing everything about relationships professionally does not mean you execute perfectly at home. Ariella matches that candor, walking through her peacemaker wiring, her inherited anxiety around conflict, and the work she has had to do to give Eli the space to fully express himself instead of rushing toward resolution.What comes through most clearly is that the couple treats their marriage as a system they are actively tending, not a fixed state they arrived at. The "tank check," the "flash mode" codeword, the end-of-argument debrief, the habit of asking what kind of conversation this is before jumping in: none of this happened by accident. It came from arguments, mess-ups, therapy, books, and a genuine willingness to keep being curious about each other even when things get hard.Key TakeawaysKnowing the theory does not guarantee you live it. Even a therapist has bad days, snaps at his wife, and has to walk it back.Checking in on each other's "tank" before making requests can short-circuit a lot of unnecessary conflict."Don't go to bed angry" is not universal wisdom. Sometimes sleeping on it is the smarter move.ADHD in a marriage is not a dealbreaker. It requires over-communication, agreed-upon signals, and a partner who stays curious rather than just compensating.The "matching principle": knowing whether a conversation is logistical, emotional, or relational before jumping in prevents a lot of crossed wires.Repair matters more than a clean fight. What you do at the end of the argument, the debrief, the "what's our takeaway," is where growth actually lives.Accountability does not mean your partner gets to stay heated indefinitely. Both people have a job: one to express fully, one to stay present without shutting it down early.Keeping the effort you put in while dating, the check-ins, the curiosity, the showing up, does not stop being necessary just because the relationship became official.Guest InfoEli Weinstein, LCSW is a licensed clinical social worker, therapist in private practice, and host of "The Dude Therapist" podcast. He is the author of From I Do to We Do: Navigating Marriage in the Parenting Years, an honest, humor-forward guide for couples working to stay connected through the chaos of raising kids. The book is available now via Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Bookshop, and Books-A-Million.Website: eliweinsteinlcsw.comPersonal: @eliweinstein_lcswAriella is Eli's wife of 11 years, a registered dietitian, and a full-time working mom of two with a third on the way at time of recording. She is not currently active on social media.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Southern Hospitality with Rob Schulte from Vanderpump Robs Melissa and Rob start out discussing In the City, The Valley and other Bravo shows in the early seasons of viewership. Rob shares thoughts on what makes these shows work behind the scenes. The duo discusses this season of Southern Hospitality, including the two-part reunion. Through this they discuss addiction, recovery, sexual fluidity, religious trauma, racism, microaggressions, mental health and more.THANK YOU FOR LISTENING and for all the support!Please follow Vanderpump Robs, Halfsies and Your Bish Therapist podcast; please give a 5-star comment & rating (it really helps!) Please follow @vanderpumprobs and @yourbishtherapist on Instagram, YouTube, Patreon, and FB. For full video (ad free, early release, full video & bonus content) visit YBT Patreon, Spreaker Supporters Club or YouTubePatreon (Ad Free, Early Release, Full Video, Bonus Content) https://patreon.com/YourBishTherapist?utm_medium=unknown&utm_source=join_link&utm_campaign=creatorshare_creator&utm_content=copyLinkApple Podcast (Ad Free): https://apple.co/3MfskzeSpreaker Supporters club (Ad Free, Early Release):  https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/your-bish-therapist--6065109/supportYouTube (Full Video): https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCu8bmVPTlWANg5v7rGRJjow?subconfirmation=1 To find links to all YBT content: https://linktr.ee/yourbishtherapistBrand Ambassador: www.Iamhumanthebrand.com for clothing with a purpose. Code BISH20 for 20% off purchaseDisclaimer: Posts are not intended to diagnose, treat or provide medical advice. Your Bish Therapist (YBT) is for entertainment and informational purposes only. The podcast, my opinions, and posts, are my own and are not associated with past or present employers, any organizations, Bravo TV, Grey Heart productions or any other television network. The information in YBT podcast and on its its social media is provided for general informational purposes only and is not intended to diagnose or treat. Please do not act or refrain from acting based on anything you read, see, or hear on YBT, podcast or associated social media. Communicating with YBT via email, and/or social media does not form a therapeutic alliance. Melissa, operator of YBT, is unable to provide any therapeutic advice, treatment or feedback.

Money conversations in the therapy world often focus on getting out of scarcity — leaving agency work, raising fees, or building a sustainable private practice. But what happens after that? What happens when your financial circumstances change, but your money beliefs haven't caught up yet?In this episode, I'm joined by Allison Puryear, founder of Abundance Practice Building, who has supported more than 10,000 therapists in creating practices that work for their lives. Together, we talk about money not as a measure of worth, but as a tool for creating a life that reflects your values. We explore how our relationships with money evolve over time — from the early days of practice building to navigating financial security, lifestyle creep, sliding scale therapy, and retirement savings.Ready to feel more calm and confident about your money? Do you feel confused, ashamed, or uncertain about your finances?Are you craving support to help shift your money mindset and transform your relationship with money?Are you ready to develop the skills and confidence you need to finally take control of your business finances and build a practice that actually takes care of you?If so, I'd love for you to join me for one of my free online workshops, designed specifically for private practice owners who feel stuck—whether it's mindset blocks, avoidance, or the technical side of managing money.In just one hour together, you'll learn practical tools, strategies, and next steps to move forward in your business (and your life) with clarity, intention, and ease.Click here to explore upcoming workshops and save your spot or register to get the replay.You can also join our new private WhatsApp community to connect with other therapists, health practitioners and listeners of Money Skills for Therapists: The Podcast — to chat about episodes, ask questions, share insights, and get support.Just reach out to us at hello@moneynutsandbolts.com, and we'll send you an invite!Financial Questions Don't End When You Earn MoreMany therapists enter private practice with money beliefs shaped by agency work, graduate school, family stories, or cultural messages about helping professions. Those beliefs don't automatically disappear as income grows — earning more often brings new questions about boundaries, fee setting, accessibility, and what “enough” actually means.As therapists, we can sometimes over-function around money, especially when it comes to sliding scale therapy or assumptions about what clients can afford. Accessibility matters, and so does building a practice that can sustainably support you, your clients, and your future.That same mindset can show up in how we think about our own financial needs and long-term planning. Retirement savings are another area where many therapists have been underserved. Whether you're self-employed, running a group practice, or just getting started, beginning small and automating savings can create meaningful financial security over time.Every Stage of Practice Brings New Money QuestionsOur relationship with money continues to evolve through every stage of practice and life.(00:03:31) Discussing longevity in therapist education(00:06:50) Feeling stuck in maximum capacity(00:12:28) Changing perspectives in education(00:15:42) Recognizing economic class differences(00:18:13) Managing lifestyle inflation(00:20:26) Offering sliding scale therapy(00:24:02) Retirement savings for practitioners(00:26:26) Talking retirement and self-care(00:30:42) Reflecting on past Thanksgivings(00:35:54) Discussing money challenges and values(00:36:41) Moving from survival to thrivingBuilding Wealth Without Losing Sight of What MattersMany of us were never taught financial literacy, retirement planning, or how to think about money in ways that align with our values. That gap can create financial anxiety, money shame, and uncertainty at every stage of a therapist's career.The goal is to build financial confidence over time — through intentional choices, stronger financial boundaries, and values-based spending that supports the life you want to create. Money can create options, security, and freedom. When we approach it as a tool instead of a reflection of our worth, we make more space for both thriving and meaningful work.About Linzy Bonham: Linzy Bonham is a therapist turned money coach who helps private practice owners and health professionals feel calm, confident, and in control of their finances through her podcast, free workshops and comprehensive programs: Money Skills for Therapists and Money Skills for Group Practice Owners.It all started when she saw her extremely skilled colleagues struggle with the money side of business. Some had even left private practice, or were avoiding starting one, because managing finances was just too stressful.So Linzy set out to support helpers and healers with developing peace of mind about their money. Since so many were never taught money skills, she focuses on the “how” of making the business side of private practice doable — and even super satisfying.Follow Linzy Bonham: About Page: https://moneyskillsfortherapists.com/aboutLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/linzybonham/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/moneyskillsfortherapists/About Allison Puryear:Allison Puryear is a therapist who burned out on agency work & then built successful private practices in 3 wildly different markets. After her caseloads grew faster in each “saturated” market, Allison realized that practice building is not rocket science when you have clarity, confidence, & a figured-out formula. So, Allison started Abundance Practice Building to help other therapists build their own full & happy private practices - because a happy therapist is a better therapist, y'all!Whether you need to get more clients in the door or need to make changes to an already full practice so you can work less & make more, Abundance Practice Building has support for all levels & at all financial abilities. Go to www.abundancepracticebuilding.com to learn more!Connect with Allison:Email: help@abundancepracticebuilding.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/abundance_practice_building/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/abundancepracticebuilding/Website: https://www.abundancepracticebuilding.com/Free checklist: https://www.abundancepracticebuilding.com/checklist

Kayleigh sits down with her former therapist, Hilary Waller, to reflect on the years they spent working together after Kayleigh's amniotic fluid embolism (AFE), birth trauma, and the life-altering experiences that followed. Together, they explore the therapeutic relationship, what healing actually looks like over time, and how trauma recovery often evolves from surviving to grieving to fully living again.This conversation offers a rare behind-the-scenes look at therapy from both the client and therapist perspective. Hilary shares insights into trauma recovery, attachment, grief, identity, and the ways healing can continue long after the most acute pain has passed. It's an honest, thoughtful discussion about what it means to rebuild a life after trauma, and how relationships can become a powerful part of that process.In This Episode, We Discuss:

Trauma informed coaching is not a speciality, it's a responsibility.  In this episode, Jess sits down with an ASC graduate who now integrates trauma-informed coaching into all of her coaching to discuss what actually changes when you understand trauma, nervous systems, emotional safety, and human behavior at a deeper level. They unpack: Why trauma-informed coaching is not the same as therapy How trauma shows up in high-functioning, successful clients What most coaches completely miss about client resistance, inconsistency, procrastination, perfectionism, people pleasing, and self-sabotage Why strategy alone often doesn't create sustainable transformation for trauma survivors How becoming trauma informed improves client results, coach confidence, and ethical coaching practices Why the coaching industry needs higher standards and better training Trauma-informed coaching isn't about becoming a therapist. It's about becoming a more skilled, effective, ethical, and transformational coach. If you want to create deeper client breakthroughs, increase client results, and confidently coach what's underneath the behavior instead of just managing symptoms, this conversation is for you. Also, enrollment for The Art & Skill of Coaching (ASC), Jess's trauma-informed coach certification and training program, is officially open. Apply now to become the coach your clients actually need.   Apply to The Art & Skill of Coaching- Enrollment open NOW:  www.chatwithjess.com   (Episode 164) Ethical Dilemmas- How to manage conflicting values with your client: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-art-skill-of-coaching-get-any-client-any/id1612960277?i=1000701684540   1-1 Trauma-Informed Coaching with Jess: www.chatwithjess.com   Find Amy on Facebook @Amy Colombo  Little Me Journal: ​​https://amycolombo.com/little-me-journal?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio&fbclid=PAdGRleASVmeNleHRuA2FlbQIxMQBzcnRjBmFwcF9pZA8xMjQwMjQ1NzQyODc0MTQAAadzs4MrnfpKMZ99EM-kjiLWQVWxO2YWb06UatnLWdtMHWehYXCFscEb61rzyQ_aem_Hm81X2ZBI_Fw2B0zEzgiig  Stay in Touch: www.jessicademarchis.com IG @jess_demarchis_coaching  

Ever wonder why we swap vulnerability for anger, or why a simple disagreement can feel like a threat to your entire relationship? In Episode 360 of Through a Therapist's Eyes, we unlock the invisible force that determines whether your relationships thrive or fracture: emotional safety. We dive into why humans swap "I'm hurt" for "You never listen," how subtle relationship killers like invalidation quietly erode trust, and how the core principles of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) can completely rewrite your connection with partners and children alike. Tune in for a raw look at what it truly takes to dismantle your defenses and build a bond safe enough for reality. Tune in to see Emotional Safety Through a Therapist's Eyes.

It's official: Vermont bans AI therapy and chatbot therapists. But is this a step forward or backward? Learn why regulators are stopping algorithms from acting as therapists.  In this episode, Nick Thompson breaks down the recent legislation in Vermont and what it means for the future of AI mental health tools.  We examine the specific risks identified by lawmakers, including instances where AI chatbots provided dangerous advice to vulnerable users, such as promoting harmful dieting tips to those struggling with eating disorders.    In this episode, you will learn: ✅  New legislation in Vermont bans AI therapy and chatbot therapists. ✅  Why AI therapy cannot replicate positive mental health outcomes. ✅  The terrifying real-world consequences of unchecked AI therapy ✅  Wrongful death lawsuits against ChatGPT and Character.AI. ✅  The massive failure of the National Eating Disorders Association's AI chatbot therapists ✅  How AI models are programmed to validate dangerous delusions rather than intervene during a crisis. ✅  Actionable steps to reclaim your power, foster real human bonds, and protect your mental health from AI chatbot therapists   Source Links

Jon revisits the D.C. reflecting pool controversy, including comments from both sides of the aisle. Jon and the listeners have theories on yesterday's discovery. GOP endorsed candidate for MN State Auditor Nate George joins to discuss his platform and offers solutions to tackle fraud.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Most people think enmeshment is love. They think it's loyalty/ being a close family or maybe it's just caring deeply about the people around them, but what if the reason you struggle to make decisions, set boundaries, trust yourself, or put your partner first has nothing to do with love and everything to do with enmeshment? In this powerful conversation, we sit down with therapist Aliza Shapiro to unpack one of the most misunderstood relationship dynamics: enmeshment. We explore how family loyalty can sometimes become control, why so many eldest children become parentified, how cultural expectations shape our identities, and what it takes to build healthy relationships without losing the people we love. Whether you're constantly seeking your parents' approval, feel responsible for everyone else's emotions, or struggle to put your own needs first, this episode will help you understand where those patterns come from and how to begin changing them. If you've ever felt guilty for choosing yourself, this conversation is for you.

 The ADHD advice that we see on social media is often not the advice that's going to help us the most. In fact, it's often the stuff that goes viral that can cause us more frustration when we try it and it doesn't work. So today, ADHD Therapist, Jenna Free, joins me to rank ADHD advice from the internet (from superior advice to advice you should ignore). After getting diagnosed with ADHD at age 32, Jenna developed a revolutionary approach to ADHD that has helped her and thousands of women.

Think about the last time you couldn't make up your mind about a big decision. Maybe you made a pro-and-con list, read every review, and talked it through with other people — and still couldn't decide. We tell ourselves that just a little more information will finally bring the certainty we need to choose. But my guest today says more research can fuel your anxiety and the certainty we're chasing doesn't actually exist. If you're indecisive, you overthink every choice, or you freeze up for fear of making the wrong decision, this episode is for you. My guest is Simone Stolzoff, a journalist and the author of The Good Enough Job. His new book, How to Not Know, is all about making hard decisions and learning to tolerate uncertainty. In this episode on decision-making and uncertainty, we discuss: Why our tolerance for uncertainty is shrinking at the exact moment the world is becoming more uncertain The two surprising ways people dodge hard decisions — and why impulsive decision-makers may be just as avoidant as obsessive researchers The study that showed we'd rather face a guaranteed painful event than sit with the uncertainty of one Why the best leaders aren't "know-it-alls" but "learn-it-alls" The Only Option Test — a fast way to break a stuck decision when both choices look equally good The Chinese farmer parable, and why "maybe yes, maybe no" is one of the most freeing things you can tell yourself The line from an oncology doctor that can change how you face anything uncertain in your future The Therapist's Take: my top three strategies for making decisions and living with uncertainty, starting today Related Episodes ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠60 — Face Fear and Embrace Uncertainty So You Can Live a Good Life with Best-Selling Author Jonathan Fields 321 — How to Use Constraints to Spark Better Ideas, Make Faster Decisions, and Live With Less Regret With Bestselling Author David Epstein Links & Resources How to Not Know Connect with the Show Buy a copy of⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Connect with Amy on Instagram —⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@AmyMorinAuthor⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Visit my website —⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠AmyMorinLCSW.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Sponsors Helix Sleep —Go to ⁠⁠⁠helixsleep.com/STRONGER⁠⁠⁠ to get 20% off sitewide   AirDoctor — Head to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠AirDoctorPro.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠and use promo code STRONGER to get UP TO $300 off today! One Skin — Go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠oneskin.co/STRONGER⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and use code stronger to get up to 30% off your first 3 subscription orders Quince — Go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Quince.com/stronger⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns! Flamingo — Get a $7 starter set at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ShopFlamingo.com/STRONGER⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Subscribe to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Mentally Stronger Premium⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for exclusive content like weekly bonus episodes, mental strength challenges, and office hours with me. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

British-born, LA-based author and illustrator Gemma Correll had a couple of reasons to choose  the motif of an amusement park for her new anxiety book, Anxietyland. One, she loves amusement parks and wanted to be able to write off a Disneyland trip as a research expedition. And also, there are so many great metaphors to be found there like emotional rollercoasters and a worry-go-round. With hilarious candor, Gemma shares her own story about fearing coyotes would eat her pets (there are no coyotes in England), taking endless flights of stairs to avoid elevators, and dealing with alcohol, who becomes a friend but not, ultimately, a good one. Secretary of Health & Human Services Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. is, to put it mildly, a skeptic of selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor (SSRI) medication, a form of meds that millions of Americans use regularly with tremendous benefit. He was once on SSRIs, went off them, then became addicted to heroin, and he believes these events are linked. He also believes they cause school shootings and cause harm to developing fetuses. There is no evidence to support this. Andrea Salinas, a Democrat who represents the 6th district in Oregon in the House of Representatives, joins us to unpack Kennedy's latest efforts to curtail SSRI use and availability and what her minority party is doing to answer the threat. Thank you to all our listeners who support the show as monthly members of Maximum Fun. Check out our I'm Glad You're Here and Depresh Mode merchandise at the brand new merch website MaxFunStore.com! Hey, remember, you're part of Depresh Mode and we want to hear what you want to hear about. What guests and issues would you like to have covered in a future episode? Write us at depreshmode@maximumfun.org. Depresh Mode is on BlueSky, Instagram, Substack, and you can join our Preshies Facebook group.  Help is available right away. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 988 or 1-800-273-8255, 1-800-273-TALK Crisis Text Line: Text HOME to 741741. International suicide hotline numbers available here: https://www.opencounseling.com/suicide-hotlines Help support this show and unlock bonus content! Become a member at https://maximumfun.org/joindepresh

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Annabel Du Boulay is an Author, Speaker, Therapist and Warrior Mama, with 35 years of academic research in, and lived embodied experience of, the Rose, Gnostic, Celtic and Avalon-Grail Lineages as a Priestess and Mystic.Annabel specialises in peeling back the layers of patriarchal religious appropriation and manipulation of ancient pagan mythology and early Gnostic teachings for the healing and empowerment of women through her Return to the Rose Garden® Programme.In these guest episodes for the Law of Positivism podcast, Annabel guides you on a journey around her Philosophia Wheel of the Year - one of the foundational frameworks of her teaching programme, which weaves the Rose and Gnostic calendar with the Celtic Wheel of the Year - exploring the different mythos, deities and archetypal energies that they embody so that you can work with them in your own life.If you'd like to join Annabel at her annual Avalon Rose Retreat Day at Chalice Well in Glastonbury on 9 July 2026, please send her a DM or email..Visit Annabel: https://annabelduboulay.com/ Return to the Rose Garden with Annabel: https://annabelduboulay.com/online-programme/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/annabelduboulay/Visit Law of Positivism:https://www.instagram.com/lawofpositivism/Website: https://www.lawofpositivism.com/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/lawofpositivism/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/lawofpositivismTikTok: www.tiktok.com/@lawofpositivism

I've been coaching therapists since 2019, and I keep seeing the same trajectory play out, in my clients and even in myself. We move through five stages when we grow something, and one of them feels like proof that something has gone wrong when it's really the opposite. Most people misread it completely, pull back from the very thing that was working, and then blame the strategy. There's also a kind of discomfort that feels identical but means the total opposite, and confusing the two will keep you handing off the wrong thing at the wrong time.In this episode, I'm walking you through all five stages, how to tell which one you're in, and why all of this is really about buying back your time for the dance class you keep saying you'll get to.Topics covered in this episode:The importance of knowing the right moment to delegate in your private practiceThe 5 stages every therapist moves through when growing a business, and how to tell which one you're in right nowThe one feeling most therapists misread completely, and what it's actually trying to tell youThe mistake that makes a working strategy stop workingResources from this episode:Liberated Business: www.thebadtherapist.coach/liberatedbusinessBuy Back Your Time: Get Unstuck, Reclaim Your Freedom, and Build Your Empire by Dan MartellThe Big Leap: Conquer Your Hidden Fear and Take Life to the Next Level by Gay HendricksConnect with Felicia:Get my freebie & join the email list: The Magic SheetsInstagram: @the_bad_therapistWebsite: www.thebadtherapist.coachQuote:"Boredom doesn't mean something is wrong. It's a signal that you've outgrown the hands-on version of that task, and that's actually a win." - Felicia

Sam and Nicole talk about being trash, authenticity, get an update on Nicole's relationship, Beef Season 2, and more Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

When I decided to leave my hands-on therapy practice and become a coach, I was nowhere near ready. I didn't have all the credentials, all the answers, or a proven roadmap. What I did have was a willingness to start, and that decision changed everything. In this episode of The Fully Booked Therapist Podcast, I'm diving into Standard #2 of a fully booked therapist: being willing to fail. I share my own experience of building a coaching business before I felt ready and explain why waiting for confidence, certainty, or perfect conditions often keeps therapists stuck. We'll talk about what waiting to be ready really looks like, how confidence is created through action, and why failure is one of the most valuable teachers in business. I also explore the connection between failure, honesty, and vulnerability, and why all three are essential for building a thriving practice. If you've been waiting for the right time to raise your rates, make an offer, market your services, or take the next step in your business, this episode will help you see why willingness matters more than readiness.   **This podcast is not medical advice and is not a substitute for consultation with an appropriate medical professional. We make no representations as to any physical, emotional, or mental health benefits that may be derived from listening to our podcast. Likewise, we do not make any representations or guarantees as to any possible income, business growth, additional clients, or any other earnings or growth benefits that may be derived from our podcast. Any testimonials, examples, or other results presented are the experiences of one client. We do not represent or guarantee you will achieve the same or similar results. You understand and agree you are solely responsible for any decisions you make from the information provided.** The Fully Booked Therapist Podcast includes affiliate links in its show notes. This means we may earn a commission if you click on or make purchases via the links in our show notes.

There's a dental provider already working in 14 states that most dentists have never heard of, and it could reshape the profession. In this week's episode, Jeff breaks down what a dental therapist is, what they can legally do, where they practice, and the two very different futures they point to: a force multiplier for independent practices, or a tool corporate uses to make high-volume dentistry pencil out. Plus, where it leaves the three tiers of dentistry, and the squeezed middle. 

When a child struggles with swallowing, chewing, or food transitions, our first instinct is often to look directly at traditional feeding strategies. But what if the missing piece of the puzzle isn't the food itself, but the foundational resting posture and function of the orofacial muscles?In this solo episode, Hallie Bulkin demystifies myofunctional therapy (Myo) and explores its critical, undeniable overlap with pediatric feeding therapy. She breaks down how addressing underlying myofunctional dysfunction can drastically accelerate your clinical progress, protect airway safety, and create long-term, sustainable outcomes for the children on your caseload.Hallie addresses common misconceptions surrounding Myo, discusses structural considerations like tongue-ties, and explains why a whole-system approach—looking at tongue posture, breathing, and body alignment—is non-negotiable. If you're ready to stop looking at oral motor function in a vacuum and want practical steps to seamlessly weave myofunctional thinking into your next feeding evaluation, this episode is exactly what you need.Key Topics & TakeawaysDefining the Scope of Myo: Understanding what myofunctional therapy actually is and how it targets the resting postures and functions of the oral and facial muscles.The Perfect Partners: Why feeding therapy and Myo should never be treated as entirely separate disciplines, but rather as deeply interconnected systems that support one another.The Trifecta of Function: Exploring how tongue resting posture, nasal breathing, and physical body posture directly dictate a child's success with chewing and safe swallowing mechanics.Debunking Common Misconceptions: Shedding light on the myths surrounding myofunctional therapy and highlighting the evidence-based research that supports its clinical efficacy.Integrating the Assessment: Practical, realistic steps to incorporate orofacial muscle function and structural considerations (like tongue-ties) into your standard feeding evaluations without blowing your timeline.Soundbites"Feeding and Myo are partners, not separate disciplines. When you treat them as a connected system, your outcomes transform.""Addressing myofunctional dysfunction speeds up feeding progress. We cannot build functional feeding skills on top of poor oral resting postures.""Myo literacy makes you a better clinician in any specialty. It completely shifts the lens through which you analyze a child's struggles."Timestamps00:02:29 | Defining Myofunctional Therapy00:03:32 | The Root Cause vs. Symptom Lens00:07:09 | Breaking Through Feeding Plateaus00:11:56 | Where Feeding and Myo Overlap00:14:41 | Airway Management & Nasal Breathing00:18:12 | Debunking the "Just Exercises" Myth00:23:54 | How to Run a Myo Assessment00:30:12 | The 5-Step Integration Framework00:33:33 | The Connected Child SystemLinks & ResourcesClinical Tool: Streamline your assessments and screen for muscle dysfunction F.A.S.T. MYO SCREENING PACKET: Need a simple & science-backed way to screen your patients for potential orofacial myofunctional disorders?WORTH A LISTEN: CONTINUE YOUR JOURNEYThe 4 Layers of Feeding: How to Finally Know Where to StartWhen You Screen a Child and Think 'Now What?STAY CONNECTED

For The Other Side NDE Videos Visit ️ youtube.com/@TheOtherSideNDEYT Purchase our book on Amazon The Other Side: Stories From the Afterlife https://a.co/d/23Bbbsa Tonisha Hood thought she was simply having trouble breathing during dinner, but within moments she says her spirit separated from her body and entered a vast, peaceful darkness unlike anything she had ever experienced. Drawn toward a brilliant swirling light, she says she saw her mother—who had passed away just months earlier—being transformed by an incredible energy that filled her with pure excitement and peace. But just as she believed she was about to join her, a mysterious voice told her she could not stay, sending her back to a life that would never feel the same again. Connect with Tonisha:  tonishahood@icloud.com Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Ask a burned-out pelvic therapist what's draining them and they'll usually say the same thing: it's a lot. The emotional weight of the work, the intimacy of the specialty, the complexity of the cases.But that's not what's actually breaking providers.Pelvic therapists who love their patients are burning out anyway — because the system they work inside was never designed to sustain them. Documentation that bleeds into evenings. Reimbursement rates that haven't kept pace with inflation in a decade. Visit lengths decided by insurance instead of clinical need. And no business training to help them see the exit before they hit the wall.In this episode, Kelly breaks down the real structural drivers of burnout in pelvic health — the ones that have nothing to do with your caseload and everything to do with the model you inherited. She covers the documentation load nobody warned you about in school, the autonomy gap that comes with insurance dependency, and why this is a practice design problem — not a mindset problem, not a resilience problem, and not a you problem.She also covers what the providers who escaped burnout actually did differently. Not the ones who took a vacation and came back to the same broken model. The ones who restructured and stayed.By the end of this episode, you'll know exactly what broke — and where to start fixing it.KEY TAKEAWAYSPelvic therapist burnout is structural, not personal — it's a model problem built into the system before you ever graduatedDocumentation load, reimbursement erosion, and the autonomy gap are the three real drivers — not patient volume or emotional laborThe providers who escaped burnout didn't work less — they rebuilt the model that was consuming them

Melissa and Lyndsay are back to discuss the last episode concluding the Summer House Drama. Melissa explains psychological concepts underlying Amanda and West's behaviors leading to a discussion about love bombing, narcissism, love addiction, manipulation, body language and so much more. THANK YOU FOR LISTENING and for all the support!Please follow Recap Rodeo and Your Bish Therapist podcast; please give a 5-star comment & rating (it really helps!)Please follow @vanderpodrecaps, @recaprodeo and @yourbishtherapist on Instagram, YouTube, Patreon, and FB.For full video (ad free, early release, full video & bonus content) visit YBT Patreon, Spreaker Supporters Club or YouTube Patreon (Ad Free, Early Release, Full Video, Bonus Content) https://patreon.com/YourBishTherapist?utm_medium=unknown&utm_source=join_link&utm_campaign=creatorshare_creator&utm_content=copyLinkApple Podcast (Ad Free): https://apple.co/3MfskzeSpreaker Supporters club (Ad Free, Early Release):  https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/your-bish-therapist--6065109/supportYouTube (Full Video): https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCu8bmVPTlWANg5v7rGRJjow?subconfirmation=1 To find links to all YBT content: https://linktr.ee/yourbishtherapistBrand Ambassador: www.Iamhumanthebrand.com for clothing with a purpose. Code BISH20 for 20% off purchaseDisclaimer: Posts are not intended to diagnose, treat or provide medical advice. Your Bish Therapist (YBT) is for entertainment and informational purposes only. The podcast, my opinions, and posts, are my own and are not associated with past or present employers, any organizations, Bravo TV, Grey Heart productions or any other television network. The information in YBT podcast and on its its social media is provided for general informational purposes only and is not intended to diagnose or treat. Please do not act or refrain from acting based on anything you read, see, or hear on YBT, podcast or associated social media. Communicating with YBT via email, and/or social media does not form a therapeutic alliance. Melissa, operator of YBT, is unable to provide any therapeutic advice, treatment or feedback.

Why does your autistic or ADHD child struggle with things that seem easy for everyone else? Maybe they can't keep their room organized. Maybe they lose things constantly. Maybe they seem overwhelmed by tasks that other children complete without much effort. And maybe you've wondered... "Are they just not trying?" In this episode, I share a personal story that completely changed the way I think about strengths, executive functioning, and why some tasks feel impossible for certain brains. When I opened the door to a cluttered closet at my clinic, I felt immediate overwhelm, shame, and paralysis. The teenager I hired to organize it had the exact opposite reaction—excitement, energy, and endless ideas. Same closet. Different brains. Different strengths. Using my own experiences as an autistic and ADHD psychologist, I discuss how visual-spatial differences and executive functioning challenges can impact organization, problem-solving, learning, navigation, daily living skills, and self-confidence. We also explore why shame doesn't help autistic and ADHD children develop skills, and how repeatedly being told they're lazy, or not trying hard enough, can have lasting effects on their mental health and self-esteem. In this episode, you'll learn: • Why some autistic and ADHD children struggle with organization, planning and cleaning their rooms • How executive functioning and visual-spatial abilities affect daily life • Why shame is not a strategy • How to identify and build on strengths • Ways parents, educators, and therapists can provide support without damaging mental health • Why different doesn't mean broken If you're a parent, educator, or therapist supporting autistic and ADHD children and teens, this episode will help you better understand what's really happening beneath the struggle—and how to respond with compassion, understanding, and practical support. Sincerely, Holly Blanc Moses, The Mom/Neurodivergent Therapist Check out these resources! The 135 School Accommodations for Autistic & ADHD Students Guide is now available, including three detailed cases with accommodations for ONLY $27.95 What's Inside:

On this episode of The Karen Kenney Show, I talk about 6 powerful things that my therapist, Daphne Rose Kingma, taught me back when I was in my 20's and living in California - that totally changed how I relate to myself and other people.I share the story of finding an old journal from my early yoga teacher training days and the little “love note” cards Daphne wrote for me that have stayed with me for nearly 30 years.We dive into learning how to​:•​ Ask for what you need•​ Notice what you're not asking for•​ Receive love and compliments without deflecting•​ Honor rest•​ Give yourself as much as you give others•​ Have real compassion for the younger parts of you who had to grow up too fast.If you've ever put yourself last, ​are an over-giver, or ​have struggled to feel worthy of ​love and your needs, ​then this one's for you​! ❤️KAREN KENNEY BIO:Karen Kenney is a writer, speaker, podcaster, certified spiritual mentor, and coach.She's known for her dynamic storytelling, her sense of humor, her Boston accent, and her no-bullshit approach to spirituality, self​-development, and transformational change work.Karen helps people to navigate this whole “being human” experience using a variety of practical tools, personal stories, and universal principles.She's been a yoga teacher for 25+ years, has been a Thai Yoga Massage practitioner since 2008.She's also a Gateless Writing Instructor, the creator of WRITE CLUB , and the host of The Karen Kenney Show podcast.She works with clients individually in her 1-to-1 program: THE QUEST and in her HEART-TO-HEART DAY using Voxer. She also leads a group coaching program and community called THE NEST.CONNECT WITH KAREN:Website: http://karenkenney.com/Podcast: https://www.karenkenney.com/podcastFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/karenkenneylive/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karenkenneylive/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@KarenKenney

“There was something about the Process that really allowed me to understand that there’s also a lot of healing that comes from pleasure and play and connection, and to really disentangle the parts of me that were so attached to being a sufferer, to being someone who struggled.” – Sara Bissell Rubin Sadie and Sara at the Hoffman Podcast Studio, Santa Sabina Medical Sociologist and Hoffman Process grad, Sara Bissell Rubin, holds a PhD in the neuroscience of pain and is a chronic pain educator. Sara joins Sadie to talk about the physical and emotional experience of pain, the science behind pain, and her experience in the Process as someone who lives with a chronic pain condition. Special note: Sara’s video episode is one of the first recorded in our new Hoffman Podcast Studio at Santa Sabina, our new retreat site. So, welcome, Sara, and welcome all to our new podcast studio home. This conversation is a warm doorway into a topic most of us would rather not discuss. With Sara’s wisdom and compassion, we can begin to change how we relate to our own pain. Sara shares that it can be hard to see our way out of pain when we’re in it. We learn to relate to pain in our childhood and take those patterns into adulthood. By disconnecting from these patterns through the Process, we can begin to relate to pain in a new way. During her Process, Sara did exactly this. She saw that she tended to relate to pain through suffering and struggle. Through the Process, Sara found that play, pleasure, and connection are powerful allies in healing. Sara says she trusts in love and compassion and is reclaiming self-trust in relation to pain. We hope you enjoy this healing conversation. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BPmSCfAfauM Listen on Apple Podcasts More about Sara Bissell Rubin: Sara Bissell Rubin has spent a lot of her life thinking about pain. A medical sociologist and chronic pain educator, Sara received her PhD from UCSF. There, she studied how neuroscience makes sense of pain and how those understandings shape the way we think about and treat it. Before that, she was a clinical bodyworker providing hands-on care for people with severe chronic pain and PTSD. During grad school, Sara developed her own chronic pain condition. This lent a layer of urgency and fervent curiosity to her research topic. She brings these three ways of knowing – academic, somatic, and lived experience – to her work as she guides individuals and groups towards finding their own resolution from chronic pain. In part because of the nature of her work, which involves walking with people through the most difficult areas of their lives, Sara came to the Hoffman Process strongly identified with her dark side. She held a strong belief that life’s struggles were where the truth lay, and that embracing them was the only path to real healing. Sara also had a secret wish that the Process would finally fix her for good. Although she advocated in her research and her work for the human capacity for agency, she didn’t truly believe that change was possible because she hadn’t experienced any lasting change in herself. During her Process, Sara realized that the constant striving to be fixed was reinforcing the shame message that she was broken and in need of fixing in the first place, and that, for her, real growth comes from love, play, and connection. Discover more: Learn more about Sara at www.painfermata.com. Follow Sara on Instagram and Facebook. As mentioned in this episode: Michael Klein, PhD, Therapist and teacher of Mindfulness and Self-Compassion Chronic Daily Migraine Sara’s teacher, Jason Beegle. •   Listen to Jason on The Hoffman Podcast: Our Pre-Process Panel – with Regina, Marc, and Jason    

Beauty entrepreneur Molly Sims & Influencer Joey Zauzig join Jeff & Shane to welcome Joey back to the show after a long 5-month pause. Plus, the chumps chat about rebranding and 6th-grade trivia.  • • •  Want more Jeff Lewis? Click here to sign up for 3 free months of SiriusXM and listen weekdays to "Jeff Lewis Live" from 12-2pE/9-11aP on Radio Andy Channel 102. Plus, tune into The Jeff Lewis Channel for even more Jeff content streaming exclusively on the SiriusXM app channel 789. • • •  Host - Jeff Lewis Guests - Joey Zauzig, Molly Sims, & Shane Douglas Senior Directors – Lisa Mantineo & Alyssa Heimrich Senior Producer & Editor - Jamison Scala Associate Producer – Oscar Beltran Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Modern relationship advice is everywhere, and most of it is making your relationships harder, not better. These are the buzzwords that we see spread all over the internet like the misused attachment labels, the "be more vulnerable" coaching, the body count debate, and the love bombing warnings. Sadia has spent years working with couples one-on-one, and almost none of it holds up in real practice. Sadia Khan is a psychotherapist and the author of The Red Flags:The Truth About Love, Trauma, and the Lies Your Therapist Didn't Warn You About, a book built around the 10 questions every therapist should be asking their clients and every partner should be asking each other. She has worked with hundreds of men and women to fix what conventional therapy keeps missing, and her approach has built her one of the largest relationship audiences online. In this episode of Habits and Hustle, Sadia breaks down why your therapist's advice may be quietly hurting your relationship, the real reason high body count damages men more than women, why people pleasers suffer more in relationships than narcissists do, and the four green flags that actually predict whether a couple makes it. This is one of those conversations that will make you rethink every "diagnosis" you have ever given an ex or a friend who's “avoidant”. What's Discussed: (5:36) Why love languages and attachment theory keep failing real couples. (6:51) The therapy advice that is quietly making men less attractive to their partners. (8:38) Why people pleasers suffer more in relationships than narcissists do. (12:43) How honesty, not niceness, is what builds real intimacy. (21:14) The narcissist label and what insisting on it actually says about you. (31:16) The four green flags every healthy relationship is built on. (1:21:14) Why high body count damages men more than women. (1:45:50) The pattern most men fall into when they cannot be alone. Thank You to Our Sponsors! AirDoctor: Head to AirDoctorPro.com and use promo code HUSTLE to get up to $300 OFF today! AirDoctor comes with a 30-day money back guarantee, plus a 3-year warranty (an $84 value) FREE! Kion: Visit getkion.com/habits for 20% OFF Momentous: Ready to try supplements that actually do what they claim? Head to livemomentous.com and use code JEN for 35% OFF your first subscription. Therasage: Visit Therasage.com and use code JEN to get 15% OFF your order. Your skin deserves this level of care. Magic Mind: Head over to magicmind.com/jen and use code JEN at checkout. Prolon: Prolon is offering listeners 30% OFF sitewide plus a $40 bonus gift when you subscribe to their 5-Day Program! Just visit prolonlife.com/JENNIFERCOHEN and use the code JENNIFERCOHEN to claim your discount and your bonus gift. Rho Nutrition: Go to RhoNutrition.com and try Rho's Liposomal Glutathione. Use code JEN20 for 20% OFF sitewide. Manna Vitality: Try it now by using the code Jennifer20 at mannavitality.com. Find more from Jen Cohen:  Website: jennifercohen.com Instagram: @therealjencohen Books: jennifercohen.com/books Speaking: jennifercohen.com/speaking-engagements Find more from Sadia Khan:  Website: sadiapsychology.com  Instagram: @thesadiapsychology  YouTube: @sadiapsychology  TikTok: @sadiapsychology  The Red Flags Book: permutedpress.com/book/the-red-flags

Many OCD themes are frequently misunderstood, misdiagnosed, or completely overlooked because they don't match the stereotypes most people associate with OCD. In this episode, I dive into the OCD themes that often fly under the radar, including Moral OCD, Harm OCD, POCD, SOCD, ROCD, disgust based OCD, symmetry OCD, and Just Right OCD.I talk about how these themes can present in children and teens, why they are often mistaken for anxiety, behavioral issues, personality traits, or even hidden desires, and how shame and mental compulsions can keep kids struggling silently for years.You'll also learn why OCD is not always driven by fear. Some themes are fueled by disgust, discomfort, uncertainty, or an overwhelming feeling that something is “off” or incomplete. I break down how OCD can lead to reassurance seeking, confession, avoidance, mental reviewing, and hidden rituals that many parents and even therapists may miss.I also discuss what parents can do if they suspect OCD is being overlooked, including how to educate themselves on OCD themes, help their child understand what OCD is doing, trust their gut, and seek out proper OCD specific support and ERP therapy.If your child has ever struggled with intrusive thoughts, shame around certain thoughts or feelings, hidden compulsions, or behaviors that never fully made sense through a traditional anxiety lens, this episode will help you better understand what may really be happening beneath the surface.Resources Discussed in Episode:Join our FREE series: How to Be an Effective Anchor for Your Kids with OCDGet your PDF handout of today's episode here.OCD Therapy through NOCDOCD Therapist DirectoryKids and Teen Course on OCDFREE Therapist Workshop on OCDCrushing OCD Workbook for KidsChloe and The Bossy Cloud OCD Picture BookBTTI OCD TrainingTexas OCD Institute***This podcast episode is sponsored by NOCD. NOCD provides online OCD therapy in the US, UK, Australia and Canada. To schedule your free 15 minute consultation to see if NOCD is a right fit for you and your child, go tohttps://go.treatmyocd.com/at_parentingThis podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be used to replace the guidance of a qualified professional.Parents, do you need more support?

Are you seeing things in your marriage or a relationship that feel a little intense or puzzling…and you’re not sure if they're normal or actually signs of a toxic relationship? If so, it's important to pause and look at the pieces of the puzzle together to see what they might be telling you. To discover if you're in a toxic relationship take our free emotional abuse test. Here are five things that might seem “normal,” but aren’t: SIGNS OF A TOXIC RELATIONSHIP THAT ARE EASY TO MISS 1. HE WANTS TO MOVE THE RELATIONSHIP FORWARD QUICKLY When you’re in a relationship with someone who seemingly shares and cares about your values and interests, it’s easy to be swept up by the intensity of it all. Especially if the relationship seems to happen at the “right” time, and things move forward quickly. But this level of intensity and pace doesn’t give you time to slow down and really think about why you seem so compatible. 2. HE WANTS CONSTANT ACCESS TO YOU, BUT HE’S CLOSED OFF It might seem caring for your partner or husband to want to know where you are all of the time. But is it reciprocal or does it feel one-sided, like he needs constant visibility into your life, while parts of his remain just out of reach? Many women in these situations describe a quiet, hard-to-explain feeling that something isn't adding up. Like he's keeping close tabs on them… while also keeping options, information, or even other relationships carefully hidden. 3. HIS MOODS SHIFT SUDDENLY AND YOU DON’T KNOW WHY Think about it…in healthy relationships, partners are usually aware of the reasons why one partner isn’t in a good mood. They typically communicate about bad days at work or when they’re not feeling well. But in toxic relationships, that level of trust and communication often isn’t there, because one partner doesn’t want it to be. Everything's fine, until it's not, and then, it suddenly is again…And you're left trying to figure out what changed. 4. HE‘S UPSET OVER SMALL THINGS Things that don't seem like a big deal, suddenly are signs of a toxic relationship. For example, you miss a turn on the way to his best friend’s birthday party… and suddenly it's not about directions anymore. He's accusing you of being disrespectful, or doing it on purpose because you don’t want to go. Or you might simply ask him to help with the groceries, and suddenly he’s angry because, “you don’t respect his time and all the things he has to do.” 5. HE’S A DIFFERENT PERSON WHEN OTHERS ARE WATCHING Things feel tense, confusing, or even cold behind closed doors…but in public, he seems calm, kind, hardworking, and completely put together. For example, during counseling or around friends, he might appear thoughtful, patient, and willing to work on the relationship. He says the right things. He looks sincere. Other people may even be impressed by how hard he's trying. But when you're alone again, it's different. The warmth disappears. The tension returns. And you're left trying to reconcile the version of him everyone else sees…with the version you live with every day. If you relate and you need support, we’re always online to help you. Go to btr.org/group/ to see my daily support group schedule. TRANSCRIPT: EARLY SIGNS OF A TOXIC RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR HUSBAND Anne:  I did an interview with a member of our community. We’re going to call her Iris, She talked about how his toxic patterns showed up in her marriage and what happened when she started using the strategies she learned in my workshop. Here’s that interview. Welcome, Iris.  Iris: Thank you. Glad to be here. Anne: Let’s start at the beginning of your story. Can you talk about how you felt when you first met your husband? Iris: He was very charming, and he seemed extremely sincere. Now I understand that he was love bombing me and was trying to make things go fast. It was very intense. And he preyed upon me at a time when I was really ready to get married and have kids. Everybody was getting married and having kids. So he went right for what was the most vulnerable part of me. And we met through a young adult single thing in our group. He proceeded to be very attentive. Anne: When you say young adult, single thing, that sounds a little bit like my faith. What’s your faith background? Iris: it’s the Catholic church. It’s actually Theology on Tap, which is at a brew pub, and you can buy a drink and mingle. And then they have a speaker. Anne: Kind of Matt Fraddish. Iris: Yes. Anne: I actually know Matt Fradd in real life. Iris: And I don’t go to the Catholic church anymore. But that was a huge part of our marriage and, we were really in a circle of pretty devout people. Which also I think contributed to my willingness to submit to him. Anne: When you say submit, can you talk about that a little bit more? EARLY CONTROL DISGUISED AS CARE AND SHARED VALUES Iris: Hindsight, there were red flags before we married. There were early signs of coercive control. It dates me, but cell phones weren’t the norm yet. And he bought me a cell phone so he could reach me more easily. He was pretty volatile. He asked me to marry him within a month or two and I deferred and we dated longer, but he was just intense. Then he would be very sorry. He would cold shoulder me at points. He’d be angry for things that were weird, wasn’t very flexible. Now I know these were signs of a toxic relationship. We went through nine months of marriage prep. So many Christian circles focus on the idea that the man is the head. I saw that in my parents' marriage too. My dad made all the decisions. My mom was independent in some ways, but she still did what he wanted. I think I expected marriage to look like that. The husband leads and the wife follows. Even though I was independent, had a master's degree, was over 30, and had traveled, I still lived in a huge Christian community where that model of marriage was everywhere. NOT RECOGNIZING SIGNS OF A TOXIC RELATIONSHIP Anne: And you just mentioned nobody actually says that, but they actually do say that, it might not be in so many words. It might not be so directly, but they like actually say it. And if you call ’em out and say, “Hey, you said this.” They usually deny it. “Of course, I didn’t say that.” And you’re like, “What? You did.” That’s the part that’s really confusing. The therapists come in or the clergy comes in, or the friends and family, and they gaslight you too. It’s like, “You’re putting words in my mouth. I didn’t say that.” Especially when they find out what he is really like, and you’re like, “What?” “You told me this.” “Well, I never did.” And they for sure did. It’s almost like no matter what you do, you can’t win. There are friends of mine and maybe friends of yours too, who are amazing and they’re like, “Oh my word, I said the wrong thing.” That is so validating. I feel like when I meet people like that, it’s easy to be like, “It’s okay did the ‘wrong thing’ too. I was doing the best I could and I didn’t know that he was abusive. And I didn’t know what was happening, and didn’t recognize signs of a toxic relationship. So I can’t blame you either.” But, for the other people who continue to not believe us and deny that they said or did certain things. ‘That’s harder. Cause it becomes this almost group of unhealthy people that you’re dealing with, rather than just the one unhealthy person. Iris: Right. Signs of a Toxic Relationship: The Sudden Switch After Marriage Anne: Did you end up going to couple therapy? Iris: In the Catholic Church you do Pre-Cana, which is pre-marriage counseling, and they saw some things that were concerning. He was very intent that he could change things. They would categorize it like how we were different. I think she said to me, “Life might always be kind of hard for him.” ‘Cause that’s what she was seeing.. He works very hard, so he seems very sincere. And he met with the man in the couple we met with. And read books and was very sincere. They said to us, “Oh, we’ve never seen somebody work so hard to try to improve themselves so that they’re ready for a marriage.” He impressed them, and I remember feeling exhausted by that point. And it was a mask. I now know that these were signs of a toxic relationship. Anne: Like you shouldn’t have to work that hard. to be normal. They are hard workers, because it would be very hard to pretend all the time. Iris: Right, and that’s how he lives. He has a mask all the time. We had this huge Catholic wedding, like an hour and 20 minute long mass. And it was that night the switch flipped. And he was angry. He cold shouldered me. We’d waited till our wedding night, and he said things that were incredibly humiliating. Seeing THE SAME SIGNS OF A TOXIC RELATIONSHIP IN OTHER WOMEN’S STORIES Iris: Then the next morning he would hardly talk to me. And we left the beautiful hotel. We were to go to a morning brunch at my parents, with guests who were from outta town and our families. And he was furious because people had decorated our car. And he had to stop at a car wash to rinse everything off before we even got to the wedding brunch. Anne: I used this story in my book. Iris: You did? Anne: Yes, this story. Someone else had the same story. Iris: Isn’t that amazing? Like how these Chucks do the same thing to us and have all the same signs of a toxic relationship. Anne: ‘ Like Twilight Zone. Cause you never gave me that story. Iris: isn’t that amazing? I feel like that in group a lot. I’m like, “Oh, that happened to me.” Anne: BTR has been like me trying to fit all the pieces together. And as I’ve tried to fit all the pieces together, things became very clear. And I’ve become very good at seeing in the dark. So this piece of the puzzle I was trying to get it to fit. Like why did he do that? I’ve never met you before, but I spent a lot of time piecing just this piece. With the other pieces that I had of other people’s stories to say, what was this about? I’ve spent so much time with this story in my brain and what it meant. I’m like, holy cow. Iris: Thank you. Thank you for somewhere to tell it, because it was something that felt so shameful for such a long time, rejected, and humiliated. RECOGNIZING THE PATTERNS OF EMOTIONALLY ABUSIVE PARTNERS Iris: So we went to that wedding brunch, and I knew he was on edge the whole time. Other people didn’t necessarily see that. We got back to the house we were making our home together, which was his house. And he was angry, he didn’t want to go on our honeymoon, but I was like, I’ve been planning a wedding. All I have been thinking of is being able to go rest on a beach. So he agreed to go, and it was a really a horrible week. He was just fighting. His anger and unreasonableness, were more signs of a toxic relationship. It’s so hard, because he can make it feel like I’m also participating. We finally came home after the week, and at several points I thought maybe I should just fly home,’because it was awful. How would I even ask somebody to come and pick me up? What would I say? What would I do? Feeling so humiliated, like we had this big wedding, we’d done all this preparation, so we finally came home and I remember the first morning after we’d gotten home. He got up, he didn’t even talk to me. He grabbed his mountain bike, and he went mountain biking all day. That was a pattern that repeats throughout our marriage, where he just does his own, yeah. Anne: I had a mountain biking all day incident as well that I wrote about in my book. All of a sudden I’m like, what is happening? This is Twilight Zone, yes. Iris: No way. The Chucks, it’s the Chuck thing, which has been the most powerful thing to learn. WOMEN HAVE DIFFERENT RESPONSES Anne: Surreal that they’re all the same. I think that’s one of the powerful things about our group sessions is that the women are so different. We all react differently and we’re all doing the right thing. Because all of our personalities are different. So some of us want to protect ourselves by being quiet and sitting back and that’s the right thing for us. Some of us want to fight the guy, because that’s how our personality is. But they do all the same things. It doesn’t seem the same, because we haven’t acted the same. And I think the thing that like really helps it all come together is when you realize they’re so transactional. That they’re going to manipulate you in whatever way works for you, all signs of a toxic relationship. So if you’ve been trying to protect yourself in a certain way, they’ve been countering your protection methods in a certain way. And then when you change up the way you’re trying to protect yourself, they almost become like a different person. But they’ve been that same exact person the whole time. It’s just that they’re so transactional that they’re like, oh, that’s not working anymore. I have to do this other thing. And this whole new set of problems comes out so they can be super, super nice or super aggressive. But the whole time, it’s manipulation and lies. Did he ever go through a time where he seemed like he was really great? WHEN PREGNANCY AND BAD ADVICE KEEP YOU STUCK WITH SIGNS OF A TOXIC RELATIONSHIP Iris: I got pregnant right away, so I probably would’ve left, but then I was pregnant and trying to navigate that. When I found out I was pregnant with my first baby, I went to therapy right away, and that therapist just didn’t have the skills to recognize an emotional cycle of abuse and really gaslit me. Then got pregnant again when my daughter was nine months old. So I had two babies, under 18 months old. That was another thing. In my faith, that I grew up with, you’re supposed to accept all babies. That was something that really kept me trapped. I knew once I was pregnant that I would always have to be linked to him. And that was incredibly devastating and terrifying. I think the Christian, and I’m going to say trope, I don’t want to make fun of anybody, but the trope of marriage that you just have to work hard enough and it will all be fine. That really was so damaging when signs of a toxic relationship are present. He did tell me early in our marriage that he had struggled with porn. He did the Every Man’s Battle stuff and everything like that. Also he confided in me that he’d used some at work. He has a security clearance and was about to be interviewed with a, polygraph. He was afraid they would ask him something like that. At the time, he was abusive our whole marriage, but it was the most intense. I didn’t even have the wherewithal to understand that. It was disturbing, it made me feel awful. But I didn’t have any brain space to process what to do with that. He downloaded it on me to get it off his chest. HE WAS Emotionally ABUSIVE ALL OF THE TIME Iris: After my second baby was born, he was probably seven months old, I tried to leave to go to a mom’s group. My ex-husband was angry with me because of my daughter, who’s my older one. I was working on potty training her. And I let her wear pants without underwear. She pooped and he was furious. He came up behind me in the bathroom and pushed me against the counter and said, “Next time, make sure she wears underwear.” So he was abusive all of the time, disrupted my sleep, and would wake me up in the night angry if I coughed. I had to sleep on 18 inches of the bed or less, without moving to not anger him. The reaction I had was to kick him to get him to back up. That’s when he grabbed me by the throat and started to strangle me. And I know now, but I felt terrible later. All I wanted to do was leave. I got my coat and I got in the car and I left. My children were still in the house with him. I just wanted to get away. I went to the mom’s group like everything was fine. But I was dissociated and in trauma. I had gone to my therapist then within a day or two and just poured everything out. And her response was, other women have it worse. And I was so humiliated, like feeling somehow I had caused this. Even though like I knew, I have education. I was in my thirties, I knew that wasn’t right. But the abuse had taken so much of my strength. That kept me so trapped for so long. It made it harder to open up. Therapists aren’t equipped to see signs of a toxic relationship Iris: And we went to so many marriage therapists, who just aren’t equipped. Because Chuck is charming, and they just don’t understand the dynamic except for one therapist who we did not go back to. They didn’t see the signs of a toxiC relationship. But she was crazy. So we went in, it was this dilapidated house. She was far back in the house. The door was open. We went in and sat down. Literally a dog with sores and the cone of shame came out, and she was like, I’ll be right there. Chuck was like, so wigged out. She came out and talked to us for a little while. She also had paranoid notes tacked up on her wall. Anyway, she talks to us for a little while, and Chuck is so wigged out, so Chuck is walking out. And before we leave she says, I want to give you something. And she hands me a page, and it has books on it. So I went home and ordered it, and then it came and I didn’t read it, like I couldn’t read it. I didn’t read it for the longest time, because it was just so painful. But that was the only therapist who saw the signs of a toxic relationship. And then I found out the next week she lost her license, in the newspaper. Anyway, she was the only one who saw the abuse and handed me a key. Anne: So she handed you a clue. When His “I Choose You” Doesn't Add Up Iris: A clue, and she was right. I had gone to other therapists over the years. I looked just crazy, because I would just cry. One therapist had different offices and I would always go to the wrong one. because I had no short term working memory available. Chuck disrupted my sleep. I’d be in the shower, he’d bring the baby in screaming and put them on the bath mat and I’d have to get out and take care of the baby. He’d drive angry, the list goes on and on. I just didn’t have the words to explain. We went to a mom’s group event where dads were invited. And he was angry at me the whole time, but only I knew that. And then I had to get in the car and drive home with him. So it was really intense. And then at about the seven year mark, he decided that marriage worked for him. It was such a delight, such a relief to have him gone for two weeks. He came home from a business trip. And he said, “I realized it’s been you the whole time. You’re really the one that I want to be married to.” Anne: Oh Iris: Right. Anne: Wait, he was having an affair. Iris: I don’t know. Anne: That sounds like something someone would say if they just broke up with someone. Because they’re like trying to choose between the person they’re having an affair with. In my book, I put the pieces together. FROM THE DAY WE GOT MARRIED, THERE WERE SIGNS OF A TOXIC RELATIONSHIP Anne: After interviewing over 200 women and hearing their stories. I’m pretty good at knowing what happened. I think in this situation, he’s having an affair and she breaks up with him. He’s feeling bummed about it. He might say out loud to you, I decided I want to be with you. Iris: Mm hmm Anne: You don’t have the context of the affair, of him breaking up with her. So this really weird out of the blue statement, “I’ve decided I want to be married to you.” When he’s been married to you for seven years is odd. It also feels like a relief, “Oh, maybe he just didn’t want to be married to me before, and now he’s choosing me.” But you don’t realize what a weird out of place thing that is, because he makes you feel better in that moment. I don’t know if that rings true to you, but it seems that would be the order of events that would precipitate out of the blue, telling you, “Oh, I’m choosing you now.” Iris: Yeah, it didn’t make me feel better, because from the day we got married, he was horrible. it was awful. Anne: So you’re like, great. Now this awful person really wants to be married to me. Iris: It felt like a lie. Now that I understand how Chuck works, like there was something he wanted, he didn’t really love me. Somebody who really loved me and realized they were wrong would’ve not said that. I think they would’ve said, ” I’ve been horrible. I can see why you wouldn’t even want to be married to me, but I realized I really want to be married to you. They would’ve said something to try to heal that. Anne: Some effort to repair. Seeing the Patterns and Signs of a Toxic Relationship Anne: Instead it was more signs of a toxic relationship. Iris: I think so. And I think that’s why it felt awful. Because he manipulated me. Which I don’t think I could verbalize at that time, but he manipulated again. Anne: Were you about to leave at that time? Was there anything about you that was different? Iris: He knew that I was unhappy, but he was abusive all of the time, yeah. Anne: Did you ever find out about explicit media use? Iris: He told me, in hindsight, he’d invited a single woman that he’d never met to our wedding. Which was weird. It was a last minute thing, and I feel like she was probably a backup. Anne: You’ve said three stories now that sound exactly like other stories. I have heard this before. Your story includes all the classic, down to the detail. Iris: Wow Anne: Of inviting someone else to the wedding. Iris: The Chuckness of it. Anne: You got a winner. Iris: He’s a doozy. He told me later that he didn’t actually want to get married. Then when I look at inviting this woman to the wedding, he didn’t admit that for many years. But when he did, I was like, oh, so she must have been the escape hatch. If he didn’t go through with marrying me, he would’ve had someone in the wings. FEELING HELPLESS Iris: I suspect he continues to use porn. He is in cybersecurity, and he always had three computers in his office. So I wonder if one of those he used. I don’t know. I’ve always been curious about what that was. I don’t think I was as tuned into that until I was leaving the marriage. And then there wasn’t much that I had access to. There wasn’t anybody that seemed to have that language who I could talk to. I just felt really helpless, and he was very manipulative and very controlling, the love bombing, he is very good at. The other part was that I was super reactive at that point. So I felt very guilty about my responses to his behavior. Even though it was less intense and further apart. But the reality is that those first seven years, in the bedroom, total coercion, marital rape, and everything now that I have words for, had happened. By that point, like there was very little he had to do to make me comply, to try to stay out of his way. I would try to have a separate life, while maintaining that Christian marriage appearance. It took me a long time to see these as signs of a toxic relationship. Anne: We would probably call it like survival mode. You are trying to survive and that’s why a lot of people use the word survivor when they talk about abuse victims, because every day you’re just trying to survive. Why Getting Help Feels So Scary at First Iris: Yeah, daily. Navigate all of the things that are happening that just don’t make any sense. And I don’t have the words for. I think during the pandemic, I started to see your Instagrams. And it was like, oh, that’s what’s happening, those are the words. That’s what this is. And beginning to be able to label things and feel like I’m not alone. Then, wanting to join group, but then being afraid. What if it doesn’t help, I don’t want Chuck to know I’m joining? Just feeling do I really want to do that? because I felt like if I go through that door, I can’t go back. Anne: Can we talk about that for a minute? because a lot of women have told me that. I followed you on Instagram, or I listened to the podcast, and I didn’t start attending group sessions because I knew it would change everything. What is it about BTR that is different in that way? It’s different than maybe therapy or something. Is it because you’re going to finally get help to look at it. Seeing the signs of a toxic relationship can be scary at first. Iris: This can make me cry. I think, because no one had helped. So I think there was an element of, I could try this and probably it’s still not going to help. By that point, looking for help for so long and thinking, I don’t know that anything will help. then being so vulnerable and beaten down. I think there’s a sense of like, does anybody really want to help me? Do I deserve help? because it certainly seems like it’s my fault. So being very afraid to join a group. Like it’s terrifying the first day. BTR FELT LIKE AN ANSWER TO PRAYER Anne: Once you did attend a group session? Were you surprised at what happened? Iris: Yeah, the first day I joined, you hear that zoom beep and you are in group and feeling so afraid. But I was so welcome. it was like I could take a breath, even though really I was crying so hard. Hearing everybody talk, hearing the coaches talk, feeling like the words made sense. I didn’t share that first time, but just crying afterwards. Like there’s somewhere that gets this. There’s somewhere where there are other women who understand this. I’ve never met anybody who knows what’s happening to me. In my story, something that’s amazing was that when my daughter was a baby, there was this show on daytime TV called Starting Over House. It was a reality show for women to go to this house and start over. They had two coaches, and I remember watching these women go, and they had all different kinds of problems that they were trying to grow from or whatever. All I wanted was to take my baby and join that house. It was a reality show. I’m sure it would not have been really super helpful. But I just wanted to have people love on me and help me figure out my marriage. That’s all I wanted. So when I came to Betrayal Trauma Recovery group, I’m not kidding you, two of the coaches looked like those two coaches on that show. It just felt like it was a prayer answer. HIS ANGER WAS THERE ALL THE TIME Iris: So Sharon and Renee, two coaches loved on me and made me feel like I wasn’t crazy. And helped me to slowly unravel what had been happening and what had happened to me, and find my voice. I joined in the spring, I was already starting to take steps in my marriage to not engage with Chuck. By July, he was angry with me all of the time. Which I’ll come back to in just a minute. But , before I had joined, he had done some really angry driving in the car. He’d been angry one day when I had locked the door to the master bedroom, because I like to pray and meditate. And then I had gotten in the shower without unlocking it. Because I just want privacy from two kids, a dog and a Chuck. He banged on the door for as long as I was in the shower, and I could hardly hear him, but it scared the pants off of my kids. I felt like I didn’t know what to do. When I joined group, I finally started to have some strategies and observe him. Sometimes I forget all the things that happened. Right before I joined in February, he bought a new car and asked for money from his father. Then he came to me and said, “I didn’t spend all the money on the car. I saved some, so either you can go to marriage therapy with me.”, which he’d been threatening, and I didn’t want to go to marriage therapy with him because we’d been many, many times. GROUP HELPED ME SEE THE SIGNS OF A TOXIC RELATIONSHIP Iris: He said, “Either you go to marriage therapy with me, and I’ll buy a car for our daughter, or I’m going to divorce you. Not long after that, I ended up joining group. Then he said, “I used that money to file for divorce. I hired an attorney, and how do you want me to serve you your papers?” At that point, I had enough skill to say you can have me served, thank you. And it was super calm. And then I actually jumped in group and was able to just process. One of the things that was so amazing was that everything happening to me in real time, I could then go in a group, get support, be in my closet, my car, or at the library. The more I went towards health and boundaries, the angrier he got. So he actually continued to ask me for two months how I wanted my divorce papers. I can see how divorce and emotional abuse were intertwined, he was using the threat of divorce to try to control me. I would say, “You can have me served.” And he would say, I don’t want to pay $400. He did that until I got a paper in the mail and I thought that I was being served. I didn’t think I could be served in the mail, which you can’t in my state, but it was actually that they were going to kick it out of the system. I took that paper to an attorney, because I had been interviewing attorneys. That kicked off the divorce process. Because I was served. Anne: That whole time he is asking, “How do you want to be served? And you’re like, “Just serve me.” DEALING WITH CONTROL WHEN HE FILED FOR DIVORCE Anne: He's trying to get you to do something to stop the divorce. He threatens you—if you don't toe the line, I'll divorce you. When you’re like, okay, go ahead and divorce me, then he’s escalating. Using all the tricks and signs of a toxic relationship that worked before. He reminds me of my ex, who said that. Then he didn’t file. Because he thought that would instigate me repairing. Or me doing the thing I was supposed to do. And when I didn’t do it, I don’t think he wanted to file for divorce. It’s just that he couldn’t figure out how to control me anymore. He was like, well, I guess I have to make these things happen. And it sounds the same in this scenario, where he’s trying to get you to do something. Because a normal person, if they’re like, how do you want me to serve you? And you say, oh, just serve me. They’d be like, okay. And they would serve you. Iris: Right, it was control. I was so thankful I could go back in group and have the framework, putting my lab coat on, doing one step at a time. Getting shored up so that I wouldn’t be bowled over by his behavior. I finally hired an attorney, and my attorney notified his attorney. Chuck came to me and said, “Well, that’s not fair. You didn’t tell me you had an attorney. And now we both have to decide to dismiss the divorce. I can’t just decide myself.” Anne: Like not to get divorced? After he’s filed, he’s like, wait. Now that you’ve responded to me serving you with divorce papers, we actually have to get divorced. Iris: Right. Anne: That sounds like my Chuck too. INDIVIDUAL SESSIONS HELPED ME GET READY FOR EACH BIG BATTLE Iris: Really, it’s like they’re all going by the same playbook. I think realizing that these are all the signs of a toxic relationship was huge. And it allowed me to understand that my job was to be strategic. Chuck does a lot of stupid as a strategy. That attorney he hired in July, by the time our status conference was in October, he’d used all of his retainer. Which was $5,000, and nothing had happened yet. Because he is a Chuck and likes to call his attorney to talk. So then right after the status conference, he fired the attorney and then went pro se for a while. I was so thankful that I had BTR, that I could do group. I could do the Betrayal Trauma Recovery individual sessions to get ready for each big barrier or battle with him, so that I went in calm and focused. It really allowed me, in my divorce process to understand that this was the best thing for me. Even though he was trying to control me. It was finally the door out. And he kept coming back to me and asking, “Do you really want a divorce?” And I would say, “You could move out.” But he never would. One of the other things was that understanding that there was going to be so much out of my control and really focusing on what was in my control. In my coaching sessions with Renee and with Sharon, being able to determine what my top priorities were. My priorities weren’t numbers. My priorities were big picture. And then I said, these are the things that are most important and this is what I want to work towards. And it helped me. I feel like things worked out well for me. WE SETTLED AN HOUR BEFORE COURT Iris: So having enough money to restart and go back to school. Having stability for my kids, not selling the house immediately so that my daughter could finish high school. Like those were the big picture things. And because Chuck just wants to fight, it was the 11th hour literally. He hired an attorney again, just weeks before our divorce was final. But we ended up settling like an hour before court. I was able just to hang on, to understand it was going to be like that no matter what I did. Like I didn’t have any control over him, and I really got up that morning not knowing what was going to happen. And being at peace in that, and that I was doing all the things that I needed to do, and to let go of that so that I wasn’t in a battle with him. That was incredibly powerful. Hard but powerful. So it’s been final for two years. And the post separation abuse continues, and BTR’s been incredibly helpful in that. I was able to stay in our marital home for a year till our daughter graduated, and then last year that sold. So I moved out and things just lined up. In part because he was so disorganized. I think that worked out in my favor. And I’m now in school finishing a post Master’s certificate in school counseling. And I got hired last fall as a school counselor. So I’m working full-time as a school counselor while finishing my certificate. Just having somewhere to work out the technical stuff and then the emotional stuff, to understand how to be strategic. RESTARTING MY LIFE Iris: Because I could stay in that place rather than be in his blender. Which is what it was for 18 years. I have been able to restart my life and feel so grateful and fortunate. That I’ve had the support, and he continues to be abusive. And my daughter now is 19 and my son is 17. And so being able to talk about that and how he behaves helped me. I know that at some point, I won’t have to interact with him as much. Or at all once my kids are bigger. But because of the type of abuser he is, because of the types of things he did to me, I know that I am at greater risk of him being dangerous to me physically. And so being able to unpack that, but also, understanding that I have a right to safety and that I can take steps to do that and not feel bad about it. He’s much sneakier now. He’s incredibly angry with me and feels like the divorce was unfair. Because his goal is control, he can’t control me anymore, I think is one reason why he’s angry. It is palpable when I’m around him. He seethes at me. Other people may not be able to see it because he’ll mask it until there’s nobody around. But I think it has been invaluable to me to have a community where I can process that and then take steps to be safe from all the signs of a toxic relationship. When I finally blocked him, which was scary to do, because we have two kids. And that was easier to be able to text and call. It was just another vector for him to get to me. BLOCKING HIM FELT SO EMPOWERING Iris: So blocking him and doing email only. It felt so empowering to make that decision and be able to unpack that in group and also get the support of “Yay, you finally blocked him.” Like I’d been talking about it for so long. And trying to figure out the signs of a toxic relationship, There are the big steps to leave abuse and there are smaller ones too. Sometimes it’s the little ones that felt really hard. Especially because then my kids would know that I blocked him. Moving away from abuse is hard. I left the house today because I have somebody cleaning my house, which I started hiring somebody. So that I can do all that I’m doing. because I’ve been in school and working full-time and parenting two teens, and it feels so empowering. When they walked in today, I was thinking, because I was coming to talk to you and I was like, they’re helping me leave abuse. And I can say that to you. I think you know that. But he was abusive with cleaning. He would wake me. He likes things clean. He’d wake the kids cleaning and it’s very controlling. But to have a clean house and not be abused, it’s hard to express. This is my safe space, and I get to decide how it gets clean. I get to decide how to spend my money. I get to make choices now that I couldn’t make before. I’m just so incredibly grateful that BTR, I can make choices and know that I can. Thank you. LEARNING THE STRATEGIES IS INVALUABLE Anne: You are so brave and so strong. Look at you. You’ve got a good job. You have enough money to be able to hire someone to help clean your house, and the lack of guilt. Because some people have the money, but they’re like, I still can’t. I should be able to, no, like look at all the amazing things that you’ve accomplished. When it comes to divorce, if people ask me my situation, I say I am proudly divorced. I am so happy divorced. And I also say things like abuse doesn’t work out for a lot of people, but it worked out so well for me. Because everything that I have gained from learning about the signs of a toxic relationship and the strategies of protecting myself, has been invaluable. Like our confidence just grows day by day. That little voice in our heads and that little like charge that feels like I’m doing something wrong or I can’t do this or I can’t do that just starts to fade away. And life feels so free and wonderful. I’m so happy for you. It’s wonderful. Good job. Iris: Thank you, thank you for starting BTR and your podcasts were such a beacon for me too. Before I started group of these voices saying, “You’re not alone, you’re not crazy.” Listening to your voice, I still probably need to hear that a lot, because he makes me feel crazy. So thank you. Anne: Well, thank you, without women like you who listen and come and use our services, we wouldn’t be here. So thank you. Our services are incredible. Our team is incredible. It’s such a safe place. THE DIFFERENCE WITH BTR SERVICES Anne: I’ve been thinking a lot about the difference between BTR and the difference in our services is that it’s so real. You really have women you can see who know your story. You can talk to them every single day in person . And they’re never going to blame you or judge you. It’s never going to be that you made some kind of soul contract, like the weird stuff that you might hear from people who somehow try to blame you. I’m like, there’s no reason to ever say any of it had anything to do with you. because you were surviving the best you could the whole time, and you were going for help, and no one gave you the right information. And none of that has anything to do with you. They are helping you deal with the signs of a toxic relationship. That’s the crazy thing about abuse. You’re doing every single thing right and you still can’t get the right information. Despite you trying to get it for years. Some people don’t believe it, because they can’t imagine that would happen. But it happens every day with so many women all over the world. Anyway, thank you for your support of BTR. Iris: It is really such a privilege to be in this community. I felt, loved on and prayed for fiercely. BTR GIVES US THE STRATEGIES THAT WE NEED Iris: I remember when I first started. I thought they’re giving us the weapons that we need to fight the battle. Almost under the cover of darkness. They sort of come into our homes, our cars, our closets, and give us the weapons we need to fight the evil that is happening to all of us. Like all of a sudden realizing the support, but also the education that BTR does, is invaluable, to help us recognize and deal with the signs of a toxic relationship. I could get out of my reactive brain and really start to think, “Oh, this is what’s happening. Okay, this is what I can do. Chuck is doing this. This is what I’ve always done, but I don’t have to do that. I can do this.” It changed everything. Anne: Well, I am so glad, thank you so much, Iris, for taking the time to share your story with me today. Iris: Thank you.

Zach sits down with Anna, a faculty member at the Relational Life Institute and one of his mentors, and her husband John, a self-described practitioner of life rather than therapy. Together, the three of them get into something that rarely happens on relationship podcasts: a real, textured, honest look at what it means to actually live relational principles inside a marriage, not just teach them.The episode turns on a fascinating contrast. Anna has been steeped in Relational Life Therapy for years, knows the language and the tools inside and out, and still finds herself slipping into covert control. John has no clinical training, no internet footprint, and no interest in marketing the work, but walks into every conversation with an intuitive grasp of what healthy relating requires. Zach presses both of them on this. What does doing the work actually mean when one partner has the vocabulary and the other just seems to live it? The answers are more interesting than either of them might have predicted.The centerpiece story is a moment from a joint retreat in Costa Rica, where Anna had to manage a minor household crisis back home without telling John what was happening. She kept things managed, kept things calm, and kept him in the dark, and then eventually had to reckon with the fact that her "helpfulness" had crossed over into exactly the pattern she spends her professional life helping couples dismantle. When she finally told him, his response was one of the most reparative moments she had experienced in their relationship. That single story opens into a much bigger conversation about the difference between protecting your partner and controlling the room, about what it costs to never let yourself be surprised by someone else's goodness.What sticks is this: the goal is not to never get off balance. It is to catch it sooner. Anna says it plainly and Zach echoes it with his now-running story about screaming at strangers in the Costco gas line. Nobody has figured this out. Nobody is immune. But some people are getting better at noticing, and this episode is 45 minutes of what that actually looks and sounds like in a real marriage.Key TakeawaysIntimacy requires level ground. You cannot have real closeness from a one-up or one-down position, whether that means superiority, caretaking, or control.Covert control often starts as kindness. What begins as "protecting" your partner can quietly become a way of managing your own anxiety about their reaction.Predicting a bad response can cost you a good one. When Anna stopped waiting for John to disappoint her and told him what was going on, she got one of the most reparative moments in their relationship.The work is not a destination you arrive at. It is the repeated, unglamorous act of noticing when you have drifted, and coming back.Doing the work is not the same as talking about the work. John's ability to intuit the relational principles without the clinical vocabulary challenges the assumption that people who read the books and say the right things are necessarily further along.How you show up solicits how your partner shows up. Bringing your grounded, adult self to an interaction invites the same from the person across from you. It is not a guarantee, but it raises the odds significantly."On a good day" is not the benchmark. The real growth shows up in what you do when it is a bad day and the old patterns are calling your name loudest.Repair is available more often than we let ourselves believe. The barrier is usually not the other person. It is the story we are already telling about how they are going to respond.Guest InfoAnna is a therapist, teacher, and faculty member at the Relational Life Institute. She is a practitioner and trainer in Relational Life Therapy, an approach developed by Terry Real. She references her use of RLT both in her clinical practice and in her own marriage. She is also Zach's mentor, a relationship he acknowledges directly during the episode.John is Anna's husband. He is not a clinician. He came to the relational principles through personal experience, yoga, mindfulness practice, and what he describes as a forced epiphany roughly a decade before this recording. His perspective as the non-therapist partner in a therapist-led framework is one of the central tensions the episode is built around.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Melissa and Lyndsay dedicate the entire episode to breaking down part three of the Summer House reunion. Melissa explains psychological concepts underlying Amanda and West's behaviors leading to a discussion about beta blockers, SSRI's and empathy. Melissa also discusses mature love vs. infatuation, emotional affairs, body language and more.THANK YOU FOR LISTENING and for all the support! Please follow Recap Rode and Your Bish Therapist podcast; please give a 5-star comment & rating (it really helps!)Please follow @vanderpodrecaps, @recaprodeo and @yourbishtherapist on Instagram, YouTube, Patreon, and FB.For full video (ad free, early release, full video & bonus content) visit YBT Patreon, Spreaker Supporters Club or YouTube Patreon (Ad Free, Early Release, Full Video, Bonus Content) https://patreon.com/YourBishTherapist?utm_medium=unknown&utm_source=join_link&utm_campaign=creatorshare_creator&utm_content=copyLinkApple Podcast (Ad Free): https://apple.co/3MfskzeSpreaker Supporters club (Ad Free, Early Release):  https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/your-bish-therapist--6065109/supportYouTube (Full Video): https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCu8bmVPTlWANg5v7rGRJjow?subconfirmation=1 To find links to all YBT content: https://linktr.ee/yourbishtherapistBrand Ambassador: www.Iamhumanthebrand.com for clothing with a purpose. Code BISH20 for 20% off purchase Disclaimer: Posts are not intended to diagnose, treat or provide medical advice. Your Bish Therapist (YBT) is for entertainment and informational purposes only. The podcast, my opinions, and posts, are my own and are not associated with past or present employers, any organizations, Bravo TV, Grey Heart productions or any other television network. The information in YBT podcast and on its its social media is provided for general informational purposes only and is not intended to diagnose or treat. Please do not act or refrain from acting based on anything you read, see, or hear on YBT, podcast or associated social media. Communicating with YBT via email, and/or social media does not form a therapeutic alliance. Melissa, operator of YBT, is unable to provide any therapeutic advice, treatment or feedback.

Dr Kirk Honda interviews his nibling, Alena Honda, about beginning their career as a therapist. You can hire Alena as your therapist at: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/alena-honda-seattle-wa/1670821 June 15, 2026This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/KIRK to get 10% off your first month.Support us by... Become a member: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOUZWV1DRtHtpP2H48S7iiw/joinBecome a patron: https://www.patreon.com/PsychologyInSeattleContact us/more info... Email: https://www.psychologyinseattle.com/contactAbout Dr. Kirk: https://www.psychologyinseattle.com/about-dr-kirk-hondaWebsite: https://www.psychologyinseattle.comGet stuff... Merch: https://psychologyinseattle-shop.fourthwall.com/KIRKgram (like Cameo): https://www.psychologyinseattle.com/kirkgramThe Psychology In Seattle Podcast ®Trigger Warning: This episode may include topics such as assault, trauma, and discrimination. If necessary, listeners are encouraged to refrain from listening and care for their safety and well-being. Disclaimer: The content provided is for educational, informational, and entertainment purposes only. Nothing here constitutes personal or professional consultation, therapy, diagnosis, or creates a counselor-client relationship. Topics discussed may generate differing points of view. If you participate (by being a guest, submitting a question, or commenting) you must do so with the knowledge that we cannot control reactions or responses from others, which may not agree with you or feel unfair. Your participation on this site is at your own risk, accepting full responsibility for any liability or harm that may result. Anything you write here may be used for discussion or endorsement of the podcast. Opinions and views expressed by the host and guest hosts are personal views. Although we take precautions and fact check, they should not be considered facts and the opinions may change. Opinions posted by participants (such as comments) are not those of the hosts. Readers should not rely on any information found here and should perform due diligence before taking any action. For a more extensive description of factors for you to consider, please see www.psychologyinseattle.com