Podcasts about Enneagram

So many this 2026 are bone-tired, pouring themselves out for everyone around them until there is nothing left, and then feeling guilty for having no energy left for the inner work they know matters, especially if they're going to have anything to bring to their spouse or familiy. In this warm and honest conversation, Christa welcomes Amy Wicks to talk about the conference she has created just for the weary, happening September 9 through 11. Together they explore why so many people are running on empty, how our own weariness and unhealed places show up in our marriages without our realizing it, and what it looks like to be restored when we are too tired to even begin. Amy shares about the remarkable voices gathering to teach, including Chuck DeGroat and Aundi Kolber, and Christa, who will be speaking on the marriage piece, talks about why our relationships need us to come full rather than empty. For the one who is too weary for the work, this is a gentle invitation to be filled first. Come join the convo + conference!!⁠ Watch on YouTube! Get inside the Enneagram and Marriage Coaching and Masterclass classroom here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠!⁠⁠ https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/the-e-m-coaching-masterclass Use the code COACH for $250 off - or - use a payment plan!! Get inside the FREE Wholehearted Summit for Weary Women Sept 9-11 here! http://www.simplywholehearted.com/a/2148302131/MhoTboBT Find Amy here at her website! www.simplywholehearted.com Find more about your type, the pod, freebies, and SO much more at our website right here! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.EnneagramandMarriage.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Take the E + M Quiz at www.QuizforCouples.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ here! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Get Christa's Best-Selling Book, The Enneagram in Marriage, here! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://a.co/d/df8SxVx Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Why can two people experience the same conversation, meeting, or problem so differently? In this episode, Gem talks with Enneagram teacher, management consultant, and executive coach Joey Stabile Schewee, author of When Working Together Doesn’t Work, about what’s happening beneath our behavior and why understanding how we process the world can transform our relationships. Joey explores the Enneagram’s three Processing Centers: Doing, Feeling, and Thinking, including what she calls the “processing divide.” She also unpacks the three stances, Independent, Responsive, and Solitary, and how they influence our relationship with time, our reference point, and the ways we engage with others. Then Joey walks through all nine Enneagram types, offering a brief, accessible description of each and helpful clues for recognizing your own type. Whether you’re new to the Enneagram or have been using it for years, this conversation offers practical insight for greater self-awareness, healthier communication, and more gracious relationships at work and beyond. Connect with Joey on IG @enneagramparents ______________________________________ Connect with Gem on Instagram and learn more on the Unhurried Living website and her new book, Hold That Thought: Sorting Through the Voices in Our Heads Learn about PACE: Certificate in Leadership and Soul Care Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Don't get to the end of this year wishing you had taken action to change your business and your life.Click here to schedule a free discovery call for your business: https://geni.us/IFORABEDon't miss an upcoming event with The Institute: https://geni.us/InstituteEvents2026Shop-Ware gives you the tools to provide your shop with everything needed to become optimally profitable.Click here to schedule a free demo: https://geni.us/Shop-Ware-Free-MonthTransform your shop's marketing with the best in the automotive industry, Shop Marketing Pros!Get a free audit of your shop's current marketing by clicking here: https://geni.us/ShopMarketingProsShop owners, are you ready to simplify your business operations? Meet 360 Payments, your one-stop solution for effortless payment processing.Imagine this—no more juggling receipts, staplers, or endless paperwork. With 360 Payments, you get everything integrated into a single, sleek digital platform.Simplify payments. Streamline operations. Check out 360payments.com today!In this episode, Lucas and David are joined by Trey Holley, a shop owner from Thomaston, Georgia. Trey shares his journey from being a lifelong mechanic to learning the ropes of business ownership, highlighting the unique challenges faced in small Southern towns. The conversation touches on the importance of supporting fellow shop owners rather than viewing them purely as competitors, and Trey offers insight into the work-life balance struggles that led him to prioritize both his health and the building of a strong, supportive team.00:00 Atlanta airport's massive scale03:41 Long walks at airports06:27 Thunder Valley racetrack experience10:30 Southern business challenges with generosity13:29 Overwhelmed by business demands19:09 New guy in town setting up20:59 University town business challenges22:34 Building Industry Relationships26:46 Discussing business challenges with spouse31:14 Discussing labor cost strategy35:32 Quality control and final checks38:55 Balancing work and family time40:33 Dealing with family anxiety44:57 Balancing multiple responsibilities47:21 Discovering the Enneagram for Communication49:12 On choosing the right people

No matter how much we'd like it to be true, we can't think our way into changing.We have so much information, language, and so many tools to help us understand what makes us tick right at our fingertips. And who doesn't love a quiz, a personality test, a self-help book, or (ahem) a podcast that helps us make sense of ourselves and others in our personal and professional lives?Whether it's Myers-Briggs, StrengthsFinder, your Enneagram, or your astrological chart, you probably have years' worth of exposure to various categories, frameworks, and language to call on. And yet, you still feel like a stranger to yourself in the moments that matter most.Because we can't intellectualize our way through change. We have to feel it. We have to do it.This is where trauma-informed leadership work actually lives, not in collecting more language for what's wrong with you or others, but in helping you recognize the echoes of your own story that are still running the show, and developing the skills to help you take action and choose differently.Today's guest has spent her career studying people, the soul, and how we relate to ourselves and others. But in writing her most recent book, she found she had to dig deeper into her own story and start to really live the work herself. And when she started living things differently, she realized there was no looking back.Dr. Alison Cook is a therapist, psychologist of religion, bestselling author, and host of the top-ranked The Best of You podcast. Widely recognized for her ability to bridge faith and psychology in a way that is both deeply practical and spiritually alive, Dr. Alison has spent over two decades helping people move from feeling disconnected to feeling secure, grounded, and loved. Her books, including Boundaries for Your Soul and The Best of You, have sold over 150,000 copies. She and her husband, Joe, are the parents of two adult children and call the mountains of Wyoming home.Listen to the full episode to hear: How Alison navigated the personal and professional anxieties raised as she brought her own story into her new bookWhy revisiting her adolescence was a deeply vulnerable but necessary piece of learning to notice her inner bids for connectionHow minimizing our everyday wounds impacts us individually and as a cultureWhy doing the inner work of witnessing yourself is part of getting your needs met in the outside worldWhy self-awareness and conscious choice matter when it comes to engaging our controllers and escape hatchesHow developing trust in her fundamental belovedness gives Alison the security to be accountable to the people in her lifeLearn more about Dr. Alison Cook:WebsiteThe Best of You PodcastInstagram: @dralisoncookFacebook: @dralisoncookThe Secure Soul: Finding Inner Strength and Connection When Trust Doesn't Come EasyLearn more about Rebecca:rebeccaching.comWork With RebeccaThe Unburdened Leader on SubstackSign up for the weekly Unburdened Leader EmailResources:FootlooseIrvin D. YalomDopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence, Anna Lembke MDInto the Quiet: Following Jesus in a World of Noise, John Mark ComerTaylor Swift - The Fate of OpheliaPretty in PinkChapters:(00:43) - Introduction (09:46) - Belonging to Our Story (15:53) - Anticipating the Costs (19:28) - Rage Journaling and Attachment Wounds (30:01) - Inner Work and Right Sized Needs (34:22) - Controller Parts Explained (40:22) - Recognize, Return, and Divine Love (43:58) - Leadership Without Othering (48:46) - Inner Life Shapes Leadership (51:25) - Rapid Fire Questions (55:30) - Where to Connect (56:14) - Closing Thoughts

A bonus episode, recorded at the International Enneagram Association conference in Minneapolis.Creek, Abram, Lindsey, and Lee sat down with Dr. Jerome Wagner and Patrick O'Leary — two Jesuits who first met the Enneagram in a Chicago graduate seminar in the early 1970s, taught by a famously dull theology professor named Bob Ochs who had gone away for a year with Claudio Naranjo and come back in bell bottoms and a flowered shirt. Fifty-four years later, they're still asking the question that runs underneath this entire conversation: is this something, or is this nothing?They walk us through what the Enneagram actually was before it was everywhere — an oral tradition shared among fifteen people in a room — and what changed when they decided to write it down. That decision cost them $75,000 in legal fees when Oscar Ichazo's Eureka Institute sued them, a case that ended in summary judgment on the grounds that this material was never anyone's to own.We also get their attempt to sort the essentials from everything added since: the Sufis gave us the circle, Gurdjieff added the numbers, Ichazo added the centers and the instincts. Everything after that, they'd argue, is sub-theory worth testing rather than inheriting.It's a rare chance to hear this history from the people who were actually in the room — and it ties directly into everything we explored in Season 5.Resources mentionedThe Enneagram Spectrum: An Introduction — Jerome P. WagnerNine Lenses on the World: The Enneagram Perspective — Jerome P. WagnerThe Enneagram: A Christian Perspective — Richard Rohr and Andreas EbertGurdjieff: Making a New World — J.G. BennettInternational Enneagram AssociationThis podcast uses the following third-party services for analysis: Podcorn - https://podcorn.com/privacy

As we have named what our spouses cannot carry for us, now we turn the corner to the best gift your marriage never knew it needed, and it is not a date night or a new technique, it is a full you. If your spouse cannot give you your worth, your aliveness, or your sense of purpose, then where do these things actually come from? Christa explores the needs that do not disappear when we stop asking our spouse to be our everything, and the things only we can tend for ourselves with the SPARKS analogy she uses, to help you find your way back to your own joy, your own worth, your own inner growth, and your own relationship with God, where we are fully seen even when the people around us are depleted. Far from being one more burden, she shows why this is a gift: when you come to your marriage full rather than empty, you free your spouse from a job they were always going to fail at, and you free yourself from the ache of waiting. With practical ways to begin tending your own soul this week, this is a freeing turn toward wholeness! ⁠Watch on YouTube! We also share about the Enneagram and Marriage coaching certification, starting 9/15 where Christa trains others to help couples reclaim what is theirs to tend. ⁠Get inside the Enneagram and Marriage Coaching and Masterclass classroom here⁠⁠⁠⁠!⁠⁠ https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/the-e-m-coaching-masterclass Use the code COACH for $250 off - or - use a payment plan!! Find more about your type, the pod, freebies, and SO much more at our website right here! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.EnneagramandMarriage.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Take the E + M Quiz at www.QuizforCouples.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ here! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Get Christa's Best-Selling Book, The Enneagram in Marriage, here! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://a.co/d/df8SxVx Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Send us Fan MailEnneagram Five: From Head Knowledge to Heart Connection | Sherri Hughes-GraggSeries: Wholehearted Enneagram: A Year Through the Types | Type Five | Episode 4 of 4Episode DescriptionWhat does it look like when a Five stops hoarding what she knows... and starts giving it away?Amy closes Type Five month with Sherri Hughes-Gragg, a Christian author and Bible teacher, who joins for one of the most theologically rich conversations of the year. Sherri has spent her career doing what Fives do best: going deeper than anyone else into the culture, history, and geography of Scripture, and then bringing back everything she found as a gift for others.Together, Amy and Sherri explore what it looks like when the Five's extraordinary interior life stops being a place of retreat and becomes a place of offering, and what it means to linger in the Savior's presence when your instinct is always to study, prepare, and observe.In this episode:Why the Five's love of depth and research is not just an intellectual gift, it's a spiritual oneWhat it actually costs a Five to take what she's studied in private and offer it publiclyWhat the Five most needs to hear about presenceThe difference between studying God and being known by Him, and why that distinction matters most for the FiveA word for every Five who has been preparing to step forward… and is still waiting until she knows enoughYou have more to give than you know. And you don't have to retreat to be safe.Sherri Gragg — BioSherri Gragg is a Christian author, speaker, freelance writer, and developmental editor whose “Bible Stories for Grown Ups” take readers into the culture, history, and geography of Scripture to find a God who is kinder and more merciful than they ever knew. She is the author of Arms Open Wide: A Call to Linger in the Savior's Presence and multiple devotionals and Bible studies. She is based in Franklin, Tennessee.Connect with Sherri: https://www.sherrigragg.net | Instagram: @sherri_graggThe Enneagram can name your patterns. It can't set you free from them. That's the difference between insight and transformation, and it's the whole focus of this summit.Learn more, check out the speakers & get your free seat!https://www.simplywholehearted.com/wholehearted-2026Support the showRESOURCES FOR YOU:Join the Waitlist for 1:1 Coaching with Amy Wickshttps://www.simplywholehearted.com/callamywicksNot sure about your Enneagram Type? Start here: https://www.simplywholehearted.com/enneagramquizEnnea-what? The Beginners Guide to the Enneagram(free course + printables)https://bit.ly/Enneagram101GuideConnect with Amy:IGWebsite

How often do you take care of yourself? In this episode, I talk with Angelique Foye-Fletcher, LMFT, RPT about breaking the cycle of self-sacrifice and:How your cultural upbringing shapes your identity as an HSPLearning to take care of yourself when you grew up in an environment or culture that didn't have room for your sensitivityWhy simple acts of mindfulness are deeply healing and can change the way you parentAngelique Foye-Fletcher (she/her) is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist and Registered Play Therapist who helps sensitive, neurodivergent adults and caregivers heal through her four pillars of Books, Nature, Play, and Connection. An INFJ, HSP, and Enneagram 4, Angelique brings curiosity, ritual, and deep empathy into her work—often lighting incense or walking in nature as part of her own healing practice.Keep in touch with Angelique:Website: https://foyefletchertherapy.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/foyefletchertherapyTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@foyefletcherllcResources Mentioned:Parent/Caregiver Support: https://foyefletchertherapy.com/parentcaregiver-support-coachingReconnect + Rejuvenate Support: https://foyefletchertherapy.com/coachingtherapy-packagesFor more deep conversations like this, join me in Sensitive Circles - a cozy online community for highly sensitive people to find meaningful connection and deepen self-awareness at their own pace. More details: https://www.sensitivecircles.com Thanks for listening! You can read the full show notes and sign up for my email list to get new episode announcements and other resources at: https://www.sensitivestories.comYou can also follow "SensitiveStrengths" for behind-the-scenes content plus more educational and inspirational HSP resources: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sensitivestrengths TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@sensitivestrengthsYoutube: https://www.youtube.com/@sensitivestrengthsAnd for more support, attend a Sensitive Sessions monthly workshop: https://www.sensitivesessions.com. Use code PODCAST for 25% off. If you have a moment, please rate and review the podcast, it helps Sensitive Stories reach more HSPs! This episode is for educational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment with a mental health or medical professional.  Some links are affiliate links. You are under no obligation to purchase any book, product or service. I am not responsible for the quality or satisfaction of any purchase.  

When the kids need everything, there is often very little left over for the marriage, and yet if our family is going to make it, fighting for it is your work to do. To this end, Christa welcomes Abbey Howe, theater graduate, beloved Enneagram voice, and the mind behind memes that have made so many of us laugh and feel seen on IG and YouTube, for a real talk about marriage in the thick of the parenting years. Abbey is living this season herself, adjusting to the genuine demands of raising a little one, and she brings both honesty and hope to this convo in her 3-4 pairing. The research is clear that marital satisfaction often dips when children are young, with less time, less sleep, and less connection to go around, and yet the couples who stay intentional come through these years with a bond that grows deeper, not weaker. Together, Christa and Abbey talk about what a spouse can and cannot carry in this season, why a parent has to tend our own self-care rather than wait for the marriage to refill us completely, and how learning to play again, to laugh and lighten up, can bring life back to both a weary parent and a tired marriage. If you are deep in the parenting years or want to remember how to bless someone in this season as you offer wisdom, this one will meet you right where you are! Watch on YouTube, too! Abbey's Team Workshops and Websites! https://abbeyhowe.com/ Abbey's book is here! https://www.amazon.com/dp/1632175681?lv=shuf&channelId=500&plpRedirect=mhFallback Follow Abbey Howe's wildly popular YouTube here! https://www.youtube.com/abbeyhowe Find Abbey on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/enneagramwithabbey/?hl=en ⁠Get inside the Enneagram and Marriage Coaching and Masterclass classroom here⁠⁠⁠!⁠⁠ https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/the-e-m-coaching-masterclass Use the code COACH for $250 off - or - use a payment plan!! Find more about your type, the pod, freebies, and SO much more at our website right here! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.EnneagramandMarriage.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Take the E + M Quiz at www.QuizforCouples.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ here! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Get Christa's Best-Selling Book, The Enneagram in Marriage, here! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://a.co/d/df8SxVx Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What happens when the type you've claimed for years turns out to be wrong? Today, I sit down with returning guest Beatrice Chestnut — Enneagram teacher, author, and co-founder of the Chestnut Paes Enneagram Academy — for a wide-ranging conversation on one of the most common (and most human) struggles in Enneagram work: mistyping. We dig into why mistyping happens, how to hold a hypothesis about someone's type without imposing it, and the subtype distinctions that resolve the Enneagram's trickiest lookalikes — especially Twos vs. Nines and the three very different faces of Type Four and Type Six. Beatrice also opens up about her own evolving growth path, and I share a personal story about the moment a single sentence in one of Beatrice's books changed how I understood myself. IN THIS EPISODE Why mistyping is a normal part of the self-discovery journey — not a system failure How to gently raise a hypothesis about someone's type without playing "Enneagram police" The key differences between Twos and Nines (emotional expression, image-consciousness, who initiates) Self-preservation, social, and sexual subtypes of Type Four — the "glad," "sad," and "mad" Fours Why Sixes so often don't recognize their own fear-based motivation until they find the Enneagram Beatrice's personal reflection on growing from a Four toward Eight-like strength What it actually feels like when your type finally "lands" ABOUT OUR GUEST Beatrice Chestnut, PhD, is the co-founder of the Chestnut Paes Enneagram Academy and author of The Complete Enneagram (new edition available next month) and The 9 Types of Leadership. Learn more at beatricechestnut.com.

In this episode of the Awareness to Action Enneagram podcast, Mario Skora, María José Munita and Seth “Creek” Creekmore talk about the instinctual biases and break down how preservers, transmitters, and navigators coach differently due to their natural strengths, blind spots. They lay out their framework to use the Enneagram for awareness, identify the internal narratives keeping clients stuck before they move into action.Connect with us:Awareness to ActionATA on DemandIG: @ataenneagrampodYouTube: ATA Podcast NetworkEmail: info@awarenesstoaction.comSend a voice message: speakpipe.com/AwarenesstoActionMario Sikora: IG: @mariosikoraTikTok: @mariosikoraWeb: mariosikora.comPod: Enneagram in a MoviePod: Thinking Well & WhySubstack: mariosikora.substack.comBook: How to Think Well, and Why: The Awareness to Action Guide to Clear ThinkingMaría José Munita: IG: @mjmunitaWeb: mjmunita.comSeth "Creek" Creekmore: IG: @_creekmorePod: Fathoms | An Enneagram PodcastPod: Delusional OptimismPod: International Enneagram Association PodcastPod: Thinking Well & Why

Shoot Us A Message!Hiring for insurance agencies requires a specific strategy to avoid turnover and protect your company culture.This episode covers the common hiring mistakes that lead visionary CEOs to lose their best talent and how to implement better agency systems for long term retention. Mandy Keene, a specialist in helping business owners align their team with their vision, joins us to discuss role fit and leadership. Learn how to identify the right candidates for your P&C agency and keep them engaged.If you are struggling with hiring or culture, check out TeamIQ to find the right role fit for your next producer.Connect with Mandy Keene: mandykeene.com/transformative-coachingKey Takeaways and Timestamps00:00 - Why self-awareness is now a business necessity01:59 - Mandy Keene's path from bullied student to coach04:14 - 25 years of coaching and using assessments05:16 - What separates grounded high achievers from destructive ones09:45 - Why misalignment creates struggle and suffering11:29 - The penguin in the desert metaphor14:14 - Jason's turning point from proving to performing18:14 - How calm and relaxed became the new standard21:53 - What understand.me is and why Russell Brunson created it25:20 - Why assessments reduce hiring risk27:26 - Hiring by personality fit instead of hiring “more of you”30:27 - Why sales hiring often goes wrong32:08 - How assessments reduce interview and hiring BS35:22 - Enneagram, DISC, and different entrepreneurial styles40:30 - Why the “integrator” is often really two or three roles44:43 - Visionaries need a manager so they can stay in the cave and create47:57 - Why EOS is useful but oversimplified for many founders50:04 - The rock star analogy for leadership and energy management53:21 - The Beatles example: staying in the creative lane56:34 - What to look for in sales and service roles60:13 - How to keep top performers by meeting their top values62:55 - Where to find understand.meThe Insurance Dudes ResourcesJoin the Agent Elite: https://www.skool.com/agenteliteBest Seller: https://MillionDollarAgencyBook.comInsurance Dudes Files: https://blog.theidudes.comTeamIQ: https://teamiq.theidudes.comTelefunnel Lead Callers: https://theidudes.comILB: https://insuranceleadbrokers.comInsurance Agency Trader: https://trader.theidudes.comIf this helps, subscribe and hit the bell so you can catch every episode.Follow UsFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/theinsurancedudesLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/the-insurance-dudes-podcastInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/insurancedudespodcastSupport the showHey there! Thank you for listening! We'd be SUPER GRATEFUL for a subscribe!And a review over on the Apple Podcasts would be incredible!Check out our newsletter, webinar, and some great Internet Lead tactics at The Insurance Dudes Homepage.We appreciate you!Craig Pretzinger & Jason FeltmanThe Insurance Dudes

As we're talking about all month, every marriage has gaps and seasons where connection runs thin or a need goes unspoken for too long. As you're learning to healthily differentiate, don't move so far away that you lose sight of the connections you DO need to have. Find where your healthy and unhealthy gaps are right here and make the healthiest move for you and your family as we learn together in this mid-week mini! ⁠Watch on YouTube!⁠ Watch on YouTube! Get inside the Enneagram and Marriage Coaching and Masterclass classroom here⁠⁠!⁠⁠ https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/the-e-m-coaching-masterclass Use the code COACH for $250 off - or - use a payment plan!! Find more about your type, the pod, freebies, and SO much more at our website right here! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.EnneagramandMarriage.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Take the E + M Quiz at www.QuizforCouples.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ here! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Get Christa's Best-Selling Book, The Enneagram in Marriage, here! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://a.co/d/df8SxVx Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

If you've spent any real time with the Enneagram, you've probably felt Chris Heuertz's influence whether you knew his name or not. Chris is the author of seven books, including The Sacred Enneagram (foreword by Richard Rohr) and The Enneagram of Belonging, with an eighth on pilgrimage coming from Simon & Schuster. But the books came out of a life: nearly three decades of humanitarian work across 70 countries, years in the anti-trafficking movement, time serving alongside Mother Teresa in Calcutta.We recorded this a couple of weeks before his wedding, and I wanted it out in the world before he walks into that new life. We talk about learning to tell stories on a word processor in India, burying 700 of the women and children he served and what that does to a person, the end of a twenty-year marriage and the strange welcome into the human family on the other side of it, rewriting sloth for the Nines, what Eights actually feel under the armor, and why the detours are sacred and the arrival is a myth.The difficulty in life is the choice.Show-note links:* Chris's site: chrisheuertz.com* The Sacred Enneagram and The Enneagram of Belonging (Bookshop.org)* Chris's Substack: Sacred Detours* Instagram: @chrisheuertz* Subscribe to The Difficulty: chadprevost.substack.com* Listen on Apple Podcasts or Spotify.* The press where it all makes sense: crossroadspublishing.group* Chad's site: chadprevost.com This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit chadprevost.substack.com

In this potent episode of The Feminine Frequency Podcast, divine feminine coach Amy Natalie connects with multi-dimensional guide, somatic therapist, and author Meghan O'Malley for a deeply enriching conversation on the art of reinvention, soul blueprints, and somatic reclamation. Together, they explore what it truly means to take up space, step out of the performative "good girl" conditioning, and activate a deeply rooted, embodied presence. Meghan shares her powerful concept of the "convergence window"—the high-pressure, alchemical space of identity shifts—and redefines how women can use human design as a somatic tool for liberation rather than another box to fit into. From the raw realities of post-travel integration to the sacred, nervous-system-testing initiation of birthing a TEDx talk on uncertainty, this episode serves as a masterclass in shifting from forced control to magnetic, feminine softness.ThemesWomen are often conditioned to perform, prove, and minimize their presence so as not to make others uncomfortable. Shifting the internal baseline from hyper-vigilance to authentic somatic softness allows women to stop abandoning themselves for the sake of over-responsibility.The nervous system naturally wants to orient to old, safe patterns of control, making conscious somatic integration essential for holding onto newfound expansion.True transformation requires moving through a pressurized middle column between intellectual insight and aligned action. This "convergence window" is an intense, often uncomfortable alchemical portal where the ego undergoes micro-deaths to build the capacity for who a person is becoming.Rather than using human design or the Enneagram to intellectualize personality types from the neck up, these frameworks serve as mechanical maps. Purpose is not a fixed destination, a career path, or a 3D achievement to conquer. From the lens of the divine feminine, purpose is an individual's unique energetic essence and the healingBy cultivating deep nervous system regulation, leaning into ecosystems of communal care, and practicing spiritual surrender, leaders can transmute heavy collective fear into creative intelligence.SPECIAL OFFER:

Most leaders who cannot delegate assume it is a process problem. Susan Drumm has studied both sides of it, and her answer is that the skill gap is real but it is rarely the whole story. Underneath it is usually a belief you have been carrying since long before you managed anyone. Susan has spent two decades coaching C-suite executives, and her work centers on pattern recognition and pattern disruption. In this conversation she explains how she spots those patterns in a leadership team, why leaders resist looking at them, and what it takes to change one in the moment. She shares the story of a leader whose habit of sugarcoating feedback traced back to being the middle child nobody paid attention to, and what shifted once he could name it. She makes a direct case that staying in pretense with your team destroys trust rather than protecting it. She walks through her four steps for catching a pattern and shifting it, explains why she uses the Enneagram over DISC or MBTI, and gets into the neuroscience of how music speeds up new habit formation. Worth your time if you manage people and keep running into the same problem in different clothing. About our guest Susan Drumm is a CEO advisor, executive coach, and the USA Today bestselling author of The Leader's Playlist. She founded Meritage Leadership 20 years ago, where she and her team work with senior leaders and executive teams on pattern recognition, team performance, and leadership development. Her background is unusual for the field. She holds degrees from Harvard Law School and Carnegie Mellon University, plus a master's in acting from the London Academy of Music and Dramatic Art. Before starting her own firm, she worked as a consultant at the Boston Consulting Group and later at NBC. She describes herself as an Enneagram type seven, which she says explains her habit of pulling unrelated disciplines together. TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Intro and sponsor 02:00 How Susan finds patterns in an executive team 04:05 Why the old playlist starts in childhood 06:05 Why this work goes better with playfulness 07:15 How sugarcoating feedback wrecked one leader's results 08:50 Why the pattern traced back to being the middle child 09:50 Why staying in pretense destroys trust 10:45 How to tell if a pattern is helping or hurting you 11:40 Harvard Law to acting school and why it all connects 17:20 What the neuroscience says about music and the brain 19:00 How to pick music that actually shifts your state 20:45 The four steps to catch a pattern and change it 23:40 Why Susan uses the Enneagram over DISC or MBTI 27:15 Where to start if you want to do this work 28:30 Why leaders who cannot delegate end up burned out 31:20 How leaders should be approaching AI right now 34:00 A first step if you feel stuck and cannot name why A QUICK GLIMPSE INTO OUR PODCAST Podcast: Transform Your Workplace, sponsored by Xenium HR Host: Brandon Laws In Brandon's own words: "The Transform Your Workplace podcast is your go-to source for the latest workplace trends, big ideas, and time-tested methods straight from the mouths of industry experts and respected thought-leaders." About Xenium HR Xenium HR is on a mission to transform workplaces by providing expert outsourced HR and payroll services for small and medium-sized businesses. With a people-first approach, Xenium helps organizations create thriving work environments where employees feel valued and supported. From navigating compliance to enhancing workplace culture, Xenium offers tailored solutions that empower growth and simplify HR. Whether managing employee relations, payroll processing, or implementing impactful training programs, Xenium is the trusted partner businesses rely on to elevate their workplace experience. Discover how Xenium can transform your workplace: Learn more Resources mentioned: The Leader's Playlist Free leadership quiz Enneagram Applied Meritage Leadership Connect with Susan Drumm: Website LinkedIn Facebook X YouTube Connect with Brandon Laws: LinkedIn Instagram About Connect with Xenium HR: Website LinkedIn Facebook Twitter Instagram YouTube

Send us Fan MailSeries: Wholehearted Enneagram: A Year Through the Types | Type Five | Episode 3 of 4What does the VVHG journey look like for a Five who has spent her career helping leaders get out of their heads and into the room?In this episode, Amy talks with Kristen Yeh, a Wholehearted Coach, Type Five, and specialist in business and leadership development who knows from the inside what it's like to be the most prepared person in the room… and still hold back. Kristen walks through the Victim, Villain, Hero, and Guide framework through a Five lens, drawing on her own story and her work coaching leaders who are ready to stop observing their lives and start inhabiting them.This episode is especially for the analysts, strategists, experts, and quiet leaders in this community, such as the Fives who have brought their knowledge into every room they've entered and are ready to find out what it feels like to bring their presence as well.You have more to give than you know. And you don't have to withdraw to be safe.Connect with Kristen Yeh: https://thriveenneagram.com/leadershipSupport the showRESOURCES FOR YOU:Join the Waitlist for 1:1 Coaching with Amy Wickshttps://www.simplywholehearted.com/callamywicksNot sure about your Enneagram Type? Start here: https://www.simplywholehearted.com/enneagramquizEnnea-what? The Beginners Guide to the Enneagram(free course + printables)https://bit.ly/Enneagram101GuideConnect with Amy:IGWebsite

Get a little Flashlight going for these three Enneagram 9s! If you are a 9, or love one, or want to love one better, give this a listen. Rev. Joe Stabile, Jeff Crosby, and Dr. Billy Schewee join Suzanne in this episode to talk about Enneagram Nines and: Generational Differences Guilt and Shame Active vs. Passive Engagement Music and more! PLUG TIME Know Your Number with Suzanne Stabile in Boston is October 2-3! lifeinthetrinityministry.com Come hear the workshop that inspired the best selling book, The Road Back to You! Friday night and all day Saturday, packed with community, compassion, and understanding. Join us at The Parish of the Epiphany in Winchester. If you can't join in person, join online!   Music Samples in today's podcast: The Enneagram Journey theme song comes from Solveig Leithaug ft. Cindy Morgan, "Lift You Up"  "Its Too Late" by Carole King (1971) "Blowin' in the Wind" by Chad Michell Trio (1963) "Today" by The Smashing Pumpkins (1993) "Father and Son" by Cat Stevens (1970)  

⁠⁠⁠This is a special and tender episode to close our month on what our spouses can and cannot carry for us, because some things, like grief, are simply too heavy for any one person to hold alone. Christa welcomes the award-winning writer and podcaster Clarissa Moll, who produces and moderates Christianity Today's flagship news podcast, The Bulletin, and who has become one of the most trusted voices on grief and hope. In 2019, Clarissa's husband Rob (type 9) died suddenly in a hiking accident at Mt. Rainier, leaving her to raise their four children as a widow, and out of that valley came her best-selling book, Beyond the Darkness: A Gentle Guide for Living with Grief and Thriving After Loss. Now a remarried widow (6-2 pairing) building a joyful blended family, Clarissa shares what it means to move through grief rather than around it, how a new marriage holds the memory of a former love, why no single person can be the whole of our healing, and where hope must take hold again after loss. No matter your loss, this conversation will meet you right where you are. Listen here! Watch on YouTube! Clarissa Moll is an award-winning writer and podcaster who helps bereaved people find flourishing after loss. Her writing (https://www.clarissamoll.com/writing) appears in Christianity Today, The Gospel Coalition, RELEVANT, Modern Loss, Grief Digest and more. She cohosted Christianity Today's [“Surprised by Grief”](https://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/podcasts/surprised-by-grief/) podcast and am a frequent guest(https://www.clarissamoll.com/speaking) at events, on podcasts and radio shows. She also hangs out behind the microphone as the producer and moderator of Christianity Today's flagship news podcast, “The Bulletin.“(https://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/podcasts/bulletin/) Get inside the Enneagram and Marriage Coaching and Masterclass classroom here⁠!⁠⁠ https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/the-e-m-coaching-masterclass Use the code COACH for $250 off - or - use a payment plan!!Find more about your type, the pod, freebies, and SO much more at our website right here! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.EnneagramandMarriage.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Take the E + M Quiz at www.QuizforCouples.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ here!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Get Christa's Best-Selling Book, The Enneagram in Marriage, here! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://a.co/d/df8SxVx Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Leaders are tired. Not all tiredness is the same, though, and understanding what kind of tired we are experiencing can be an important first step toward meaningful rest and self-care. In this conversation, Trisha and therapist Chelsie Sargent explore the different kinds of fatigue leaders experience, from burnout and compassion fatigue to the exhaustion we create for ourselves by overcommitting, ignoring boundaries, and staying constantly "on." Together, they consider what authentic self-care and rest can look like for leaders.   Chelsie Sargent is a Licensed Professional Counselor with a Doctorate of Professional Counseling. She has extensive experience working with individuals, families, teens, and young adults, with a focus on issues including anxiety, depression, trauma, grief, abuse, and anger management. Chelsea is also a Certified Anger Resolution Therapist and has training in the Enneagram and EMDR. Key Takeaways Not All Tiredness Is the Same Burnout, Compassion Fatigue, and "Burn Up" The Fatigue We Create for Ourselves Boundaries and the Window of Tolerance Learning to Turn It Off Getting Unstuck From Other People's Anxiety Treat Yourself vs. Self-Care Caring for Body, Mind, and Soul Making Space for Authentic Rest Resources   http://www.chelsiesargentcounseling.com/

“Assessment is a hue of understanding, not a frame of understanding.” –Christina GiammalvaI LOVE a good assessment. They can be so useful in helping us understand ourselves and work with our own strengths or rhythms. On the flip side, if not used well, the results and reports can become more noise or even box us in. So what do we make of assessments and how can they help us? Let's dive in with Christina Giammalva, therapist and coach, who uses assessments regularly with clients and helped write about assessments for the most recent issue of Pause Magazine. We talk about: Difference between Myers–Briggs typesRoot fears identified in the EnneagramComparing people with the same responses on one assessment and different responses on another Finding comfort in understanding how we are and working better with others by understanding we aren't all the sameUnderstanding attachment theory and wondering if we are enoughThe idea of self-acceptance, not self-improvementABOUT CHRISTINAChristina Giammalva is a Somatic Counselor helping individuals from around the world reach new levels of inner calm. Through revealing the connections between the mind and body, she's devoted to helping clients address deep-rooted issues that cause anxiety, stress, depression and other health-related struggles. LINKShttps://www.christinagiammalva.com/https://www.instagram.com/cfgiammalva/Pause Magazine, Issue 5DOABLE CHANGESAt the end of every episode, we share three doable changes, so you can take what you've heard and put it into action. Action is how change happens.Often we feel like our actions have to be huge to match the bigness of our desires, but we have seen over and over and over again that the little things add up. By stacking up a series of Doable Changes, you will create that big change that you crave. Choose the one that really resonates with you this week and really make it part of your life. Here are Three Doable Changes from this conversation:TRY AN ASSESSMENT. If you haven't taken the Myers-Briggs or Enneagram or Attachment Theory, pick one to try. Don't overthink the questions as you answer. Read the basics about your results. Write down any ahas you have about yourself.CONNECT IDEAS. Try taking more than one assessment. What information do you find showing up in different ways? What intrigues you from each?WORK WITH WHAT YOU LEARN. Understanding how you are wired — and how others are — can be useful. Teams often take similar assessments to understand how members operate. This can help with interpersonal dynamics. Christina found recognizing that her children were wired differently from her helped her mother them. If you have someone you live or work with willing to take the test and share results, discuss what you learn and one thing you might try to change to improve the way you communicate or work together.

So much of what we hand our spouse to fix is really our own inner work in disguise. In this episode Christa turns to two of the most useful words the Enneagram gives us: your vice and your virtue. Your vice is the emotional pattern that runs the show under stress, the overused survival strategy of your type, and your virtue is the higher quality that naturally emerges as you heal and grow. She walks through all nine types, from the One's movement out of resentment toward serenity to the Nine's movement out of self-forgetting toward showing up fully, and shows how the whole of growth is the slow journey from vice to virtue. Then she names the heart of it for marriage: your spouse cannot heal your vice for you. When we ask them to soothe it instead of doing our own work, we exhaust them and stay stuck, but when we own it, we free them and we grow. With honest, practical steps for naming your vice, catching it in the small daily moments, and taking one step toward your virtue, this is a freeing reminder that the most loving thing you can do for your marriage is often to go do your own inner work. Plus a look at the coaching certification where Christa trains others to walk couples through exactly this. Get inside the Enneagram and Marriage Coaching and Masterclass classroom here!⁠ https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/the-e-m-coaching-masterclass Use the code COACH for $250 off - or - use a payment plan!! Find more about your type, the pod, freebies, and SO much more at our website right here! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.EnneagramandMarriage.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Take the E + M Quiz at www.QuizforCouples.com ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ here!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Get Christa's Best-Selling Book, The Enneagram in Marriage, here! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://a.co/d/df8SxVx Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What if the story you're telling yourself isn't the whole story?Quiet leaders often spend a lot of time thinking, processing, and trying to understand what's happening around them. But sometimes that thoughtful processing can turn into assumptions... about what someone meant, why they didn't respond, what they're thinking, or what a situation says about us.In this episode of Strength in Numbers, Jilann continues the Quiet Strength: The Power of Heart Postures series by exploring the power of choosing curiosity over assumption. You'll discover how an open heart allows us to pause, ask better questions, and stay open to perspectives we may not have considered.Using the Enneagram's Hornevian Stances - Dutiful, Assertive, and Withdrawn - Jilann explores the different ways we may naturally respond when we're uncertain or trying to make sense of other people. You'll learn how your natural stance can influence the assumptions you make and how curiosity can help you communicate more clearly and lead with greater openness.In this episode, you'll discover:Why we so easily fill in the blanks when we don't have all the informationHow assumptions can affect leadership and relationshipsHow the Enneagram's three Stances influence the way we process uncertaintyWhy quiet leaders can sometimes process internally instead of communicating outwardlyHow to replace assumptions with curiosity and better questionsThree simple questions to help you pause before creating a story about someone elseIf you've ever replayed a conversation, wondered what someone really meant, or realized you may have made assumptions without having all the information, this episode offers a practical way to stay open, communicate more clearly, and lead with greater confidence.Would you like to join us for our next Quiet Strength Gathering? Learn more and sign up here!Keywords: quiet leadership, quiet leaders, Enneagram, Hornevian Stances, Enneagram Stances, curiosity, assumptions, communication, leadership development, relationships, self-awareness, open heart, personal growth, women in leadership, authentic leadership, Strength in Numbers podcast.

Check out The Coven Try the Free Enneagram Quiz!!!! Message me on Instagram @Angie.Alchemist and ask all your Enneagram questions! OR email me at angiealchemy@gmail.com Check out more at AngieAlchemist.com Show Notes: Enneagram 2s and How They Relate to Every Type In this episode of Enneagram Ego Death, Angie Alchemist breaks down Enneagram Type 2 and how Twos relate to each Enneagram type. Learn the core traits of Type 2, common relationship patterns, and the biggest growth edges for Twos in friendships, romance, and everyday connection. Enneagram Type 2 How Enneagram 2 relates to other types Enneagram relationship dynamics Enneagram compatibility Type 2 strengths and challenges Boundaries for Enneagram Twos Reciprocity, compassion, and connection Enneagram 2 growth tips Key takeaway Enneagram Twos are deeply relational, compassionate, and driven by connection, but they also need strong boundaries and healthy reciprocity to thrive.

Send us Fan MailWhat does a Five do when the very thing she most fears (needing people) becomes the doorway into the life she's always wanted?In this episode, Amy talks with Georgia, a Type Five medical professional whose story is one of the most honest portraits of Five courage you'll hear. Georgia shares what it actually looked like to navigate a blended family, pour herself out professionally in a caregiving field, and walk the long road of reconciliation with a brother she'd been estranged from — all while learning that she had far more to give than she ever believed.You'll hear about:Why Georgia initially managed the pain of estrangement the way Fives manage most pain — by going inward and going quietWhat it cost her to stay in a relationship with her bonus son when love felt like something she might not have enough ofThe moment she realized that withdrawal wasn't protecting her — it was just making her lonelierHow reconciliation with her brother became a spiritual practice, not just a relational oneThe practices that helped her move from guarded to genuinely presentWhat she'd tell a Five who is standing at the edge of a relationship that terrifies themThis isn't about having it all figured out. It's about discovering that connection doesn't actually empty you the way you feared it would.You have more to give than you know. And you don't have to disappear to be safe.Support the showRESOURCES FOR YOU:Join the Waitlist for 1:1 Coaching with Amy Wickshttps://www.simplywholehearted.com/callamywicksNot sure about your Enneagram Type? Start here: https://www.simplywholehearted.com/enneagramquizEnnea-what? The Beginners Guide to the Enneagram(free course + printables)https://bit.ly/Enneagram101GuideConnect with Amy:IGWebsite

Episode 244This episode is extra special — Katie Ruley was one of my very first guests back when this podcast was audio-only, and now I get to sit across the table from her on video! Katie is the founder of EnLighten Enneagram, and in the five years since we last recorded, her coaching business has grown in ways neither of us could have predicted.We talk about the "scary yes" that started it all, what makes the Enneagram so different from every other personality assessment, and how understanding her family's wiring transformed Katie's marriage and her relationships with her four kids. Her reminder that "a better me is a better we" hit home for me — I think it will for you too.Connect with Katie: enlightenenneagram.com (she's also on Instagram, Facebook, and LinkedIn — and yes, you can even text her; the number is on her website).Today's sponsors: Five Star Painting of Tulsa (fivestarpainting.com/tulsa) and Colonial Title (colonialtitle.com).Chapters:0:00 Coming up0:21 Sharing Passion & Purpose0:38 Welcome: Katie returns to the show1:27 How a podcast word she didn't know became a calling5:21 What makes the Enneagram different: motivation, not behavior6:50 A word from our sponsors7:44 Saving her family relationships12:38 "A better me is a better we"14:37 Who Katie serves: girls' nights to corporate teams18:40 Sponsor: Colonial Title19:16 Myths: is the Enneagram at odds with faith?24:05 Rapid fire + the book she's going to write31:27 Until next timeABOUT NANCYNancy Moore is the host of Sharing Passion and Purpose, a weekly podcast offering career and creative inspiration to help you build a purpose-filled life — pursuing a career with passion, tapping into your creative potential, and building on your best resource: yourself.ABOUT KATIE RULEYKatie Ruley is the founder of EnLighten Enneagram, where she coaches individuals, couples, families, and corporate teams to understand the "why" behind how they think, feel, and act. Learn more at enlightenenneagram.com.CONNECT & GO DEEPERJoin Nancy's free community: https://www.skool.com/sharingpassionandpurposePodcast website: https://sharingpassionandpurpose.comWork with Nancy: https://nancymoore.co

In this episode, Ian Morgan Cron and I talk about Chasing Francis, the novel he wrote twenty years ago (before anyone called it deconstruction) about a megachurch pastor who loses his faith mid-sermon and goes looking for St. Francis in Italy. We get into a 13th-century church that looks a lot like ours, beauty as a doorway back to God, why Francis walked across a battlefield to meet a sultan, the difference between spotlight attention and lantern attention, and why the sermon on the mount should be read as instructions.Ian Morgan Cron is a bestselling author, Episcopal priest, trained psychotherapist, Enneagram teacher, Dove Award-winning songwriter, and one of the most sought-after voices in American spirituality today. His Enneagram primer The Road Back to You has sold over one million copies and launched a global conversation about self-knowledge and spiritual formation. But Chasing Francis is where it all started — and where it still leads. Ian's work spans psychology, theology, the arts, and pastoral care. He speaks from lived experience: he has sat with the burned out, the doubting, the spiritually shipwrecked — and he has been all three himself. He is the host of the widely popular podcast Typology and has appeared on media across the country.Ian's Book:Chasing FrancisIan's RecommendationsThe Master and His EmissaryThe Myth of NormalConnect with Joshua: jjohnson@shiftingculturepodcast.comGo to www.shiftingculturepodcast.com to interact and donate. Every donation helps to produce more podcasts for you to enjoy.Follow on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Threads, Bluesky or YouTubeSupport the podcast and the ministry that my wife and I do around the world. Just click on the support the show link below Support the show

Faith-Fueled EntrepreneurshipShe left an abusive, alcohol-fueled marriage with twin boys in tow, rebuilt her career from the ground up, and eventually grew into the owner of a boutique recruiting and staffing firm that can run without her. Mary joins us for a deeply human conversation about what it actually takes to survive big life transitions while still building a business with integrity, warmth, and staying power. If you're navigating motherhood, entrepreneurship, or both, her story hits with honesty and calm authority.We talk about faith as a real-world leadership tool, not a slogan. Mary shares how Al-Anon shaped her understanding of codependency, boundaries, and the daily choice to shift from worry to prayer. We also get specific about leadership and delegation, including the mindset that finally let her step away for weeks: building a team with trust, clarity, and decision-making power, then practicing a true disconnect.Then we go somewhere unexpected and beautiful: Mary's Camino de Santiago pilgrimage. Walking mile after mile becomes a mirror for purpose, self-talk, and slowing down, lessons she brings straight back into how she leads Advent Talent Group and how she thinks about work-life blend instead of chasing “balance.” Along the way, we touch the Enneagram, DISC, resilience through the recession and COVID-19, and why community groups matter for women business owners.If you enjoy this conversation, subscribe, share it with a friend who needs a steadier next step, and leave a quick review so more people can find stories like Mary's.Resources:WPO: Women President's OrganizationNAWBO: National Association Women Business OwnersRotary of MinnesotaAllied ExecutivesBruno PressConnect with Mary:LinkedIn: Mary Younggren & Advent Talent GroupWebsite: Advent Talent GroupContact the Host, Kelly Kirk:Email: info.ryh7@gmail.comGet Connected/Follow:The Hue Drop Newsletter: Subscribe HereIG: @ryh_pod & @thekelly.tanke.kirkFacebook: Reclaiming Your Hue Facebook PageCAKES Affiliate Link: KELLYKIRKCredits:Editor: Joseph KirkMusic: Kristofer Tanke Thanks for listening & cheers to Reclaiming Your Hue! 

Natalia welcomes Pastor Holly Johnson to help answer a listener question about the enneagram and how it is connected (or can be connected) to faith.  Enneagram Made Easy, by Elizabeth Wagele and Renee Baron The Enneagram, by Helen Palmer  Patreon

Long-Game Parenting with Elizabeth Pehrson (Episode 295)   Exodus 23:20 NLT “See, I am sending an angel before you to protect you on your journey and lead you safely to the place I have prepared for you.”   *Transcription Below*   Elizabeth Pehrson is a speaker, podcaster and founder of The Exchange. She's a yellow sanguine, who is full of energy and lives life wide-open! She loves Jesus and meaningful connections. Elizabeth is married to David and mother of EIGHT children, who range from high school to graduated from college.   Follow her online:  Instagram: @long_game_parenting or @octomama or @theexchangeus Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/elizabeth.m.pehrson   Thank you to our sponsor: Sam Leman Eureka   Questions and Topics We Cover: What is our role, as parents, in making an effort to help our children have a positive relationship with their siblings? What are ways we can positively shape our children to have strong and healthy relationships with friends?  How can we help our children uncover, articulate, and pursue their purpose in life?    Other Savvy Sauce Episodes Mentioned: 74 Effective Parenting for Toddlers Through College with Wife, Mother to 8, and The Exchange Founder, Elizabeth Pehrson Part 1  75 Responding to God's Stirring with Elizabeth Pehrson, Founder of The Exchange, Part Two God-honoring Relationship Between a Mother-in-Law and Daughter-in-Law with Author of The Mother-in-Law Dance, Annie Chapman   Connect with The Savvy Sauce on Facebook or Instagram or Our Website   Gospel Scripture: (all NIV) Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,”   Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”   Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.”    Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.”    Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”    Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.”    John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”   Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”    Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”   Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”   Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God's possession- to the praise of his glory.”   Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.”   Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“   Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“   Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”   *Transcription*   Music: (0:00 – 0:10)   Laura Dugger: (0:11 - 1:54) Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, where we have practical chats for intentional living. I'm your host, Laura Dugger, and I'm so glad you're here. The principles of honesty and integrity that Sam Leman founded his business on continue today, over 55 years later, at Sam Leman Chevrolet Eureka.   Owned and operated by the Bertschi family, Sam Leman and Eureka appreciates the support they've received from their customers all over central Illinois and beyond. Visit them today at lemangm.com. My returning guest for today is the very energetic, married mother of eight, and founder of The Exchange, Elizabeth Pearson.   I highly recommend that, first of all, you find the link in the show notes to start with our first two episodes together that we did a while back. They focus primarily on raising younger children, but today we're going to focus on parenting teens and beyond in hopes of launching faithful and healthy adults someday. So, with that goal in mind, we're going to begin by discussing relationship-building strategies to foster a life of rightly ordered affections, where we're all loving God and loving others as ourselves.   Then we're going to move into some more actionable ways to ensure our family delights in the abundant life in Christ. Here's our chat.   Welcome back to The Savvy Sauce, Elizabeth.   Elizabeth Pehrson: (1:55 - 1:57) Well, thank you so much for having me. What a joy.   Laura Dugger: (1:58 - 2:23) Well, I'm just going to start with something that's a little tricky because we obviously cannot control the outcome, but we can be faithful to our calling as parents. So, Elizabeth, do you have any practical tips for helping our children rightly order their affections so that they'll hopefully grow up to love God?   Elizabeth Pehrson: (2:23 - 4:52) Yes. I appreciate you asking with the disclaimers because I do think that that's an important thing because, first of all, I just want to say that I hope that every single woman listening can understand, believe, and trust that God loves our children way more than we do. And as much as we want to control the outcome or guarantee the outcome with our children, we can't.   All we can do is just be faithful to the children that God's entrusted to us. And when it comes to ordering our children's affections, I would basically just say it can't be forced. It can't be image-driven.   And I say that because, unfortunately, I see that a lot in Christian homes today, a lot. And I think one of the most helpful shifts for me in realizing that I cannot control anything when it comes to my children is that I can shape the environment where their loves are formed. That's one thing that is in my control.   That is something that I can do. And a few practical ways that you can do this, and first I'm going to say this a lot, the most important things that we can offer our children are caught, they're not taught. And we have to model it more than we preach it because our children are incredible observers.   And they notice what we prioritize. They notice what interrupts us. They notice what doesn't interrupt us.   And if God's something we only talk about on Sundays, then they feel that. But if they see us turning to Him when we're anxious, when we're grateful, when we're confused, they start to associate God with real life, not just rules. And second, I would just say, I think it's super important to help our kids understand what's worthy of love, right?   I mean, I think we should talk openly with our kids about sports, friends, achievements, you know, how those can be gifts, but they are terrible gods. And also, that they're very, very, very short-sighted. It's not typically, I would say, not typically the so-called bad things that are stealing our affections.   It's usually the good things that are just not often the best things. And so that I would say, like when I watch my children, oftentimes it would be them loving a good thing too much, you know. Most importantly, I would just say that if our kids or your kids or the listeners' kids grow up knowing the heart of God rather than the rules of God, I think their affections will know where to turn.   Laura Dugger: (4:53 - 5:04) Oh, that's so well said. And do you have any ideas for characteristics that will help foster a healthy parent-child relationship?   Elizabeth Pehrson: (5:05 - 8:07) Oh, goodness. I would say, you know, so many things. I think children thrive when they feel safe, when the home feels predictable, when it feels secure, and especially when we listen more than we lecture.   You know, when we can do that, they will feel understood and they won't feel constantly corrected. You know, I grew up in a home that I'm very grateful for, but in my home, love often felt transactional. If I did this, then that.   But, you know, we all know that love isn't something that is earned. You know, it's freely given. And so, our love and affection should never be tied to performance or behavior.   But again, unfortunately, what I see on a regular daily basis is that moms are more codependent on their children than ever before. And because of that, they see their children's behavior as a reflection of themselves. And so that love can become a little bit transactional.   But I would say, practically speaking, I think there's lots of things that encourage a healthy parent-child relationship. And, you know, we could go through a whole list of these things. But the first thing I would say is not being their friend yet.   Down the road, but not yet. You know, we'll have time for that later. But if we treat them as peers right now while they're in the home, authority isn't a value at all that is taught to be respected.   It isn't. And, you know, another thing would be just basic consistent boundaries because structure is actually what creates freedom, right? Open communication, you know, where hard conversations can be had.   And I'm going to tell you, this is something that we were not the best at, but we found ourselves consistently apologizing for, you know, avoiding that hard conversation and then having come back to it. That was a big one. You know, repair after conflict.   That's huge because it is so important for our kids to see us model, you know, owning our mistakes, apologizing for it, you know, when we mess up because that teaches the kids that our relationships can bend without breaking. And the last thing I thought of when I thought about this question was respect for autonomy. And I say that because healthy relationships are ones where we allow our kids to grow and evolve.   But a lot of times we want to keep them stuck in whatever that age, whatever that stage is. And children need to be allowed age-appropriate independence. They need to be allowed age-appropriate freedom, you know, constantly just letting that rope out little by little by little and, you know, knowing that parents eventually will just get to the place where they can guide mentor without instructing, you know, our, our goal for them is their own autonomy and their own independence.   Laura Dugger: (8:09 - 8:28) That's so good. It makes me even think recently I was reading something about leave and cleave and leaving is breaking all dependencies. And I thought that's kind of the kindness of the Lord that we do that a little by little.   Every year, probably of parenting.   Elizabeth Pehrson: (8:29 - 9:51) Oh, it's, it's the truth. And it's interesting that you say that because one, we have an 18-year-old boy that's graduating. And my husband and I were just talking, we think it's the goodness of the Lord because what we've noticed, not disrespect, but just this pulling away as he's, you know, nearing graduation, really wanting more independence, not necessarily telling us where he's going to be just, you know, he's not going to be able to go to college.   And then we're like, “Oh, I went to so-and-so's house.” And after the fact, and in, in a way when our first son started doing that, I was like, “You know what? He's not, he still lives in this, you know, in this home under this roof.”   But it's like my husband said, “You know, it's almost like God's goodness that allows him to pull away a little bit, a little bit, a little bit. So that when he does leave in August, end of July, It makes it a little bit easier. You know?”   And then that leave and cleave thing, you said, “I have a son that lives in Houston and he's the lead part just fine, independent, separate, but now he's cleaving to someone else as he's met a girl and that part has been hard for me.” It's like, whoa, like that's a whole, that's like next level, you know, where they no longer, you're no longer the one they call for advice. You're no longer the woman in their life, so to speak.   And so, it's been a lot of growing pains, but it's all, again, it's exactly what God designed when we raise our kids.   Laura Dugger:: (9:51 - 10:28) But you're right, it's both and it's beautiful, but it's hard and very difficult to go through. It makes me think one of my top 10 of all-time favorite episodes was with Annie Chapman and she wrote the mother-in-law dance. And so, I'll link to that episode as well in the show notes, but I think it was very helpful for even preparing now what that's going to look like someday.   Yep. But as we come back to focusing on today, Elizabeth, what is our role as parents in making an effort to help our children have a positive relationship with their siblings?   Elizabeth Pehrson: (10:29 - 14:01) Oh, goodness. Having eight children, you know, they have a lot of siblings and ever since our kids were little, David and I just have prayed over and over and over again, one, that they would know, love, and serve God, two, that they would stay close to each other, and then three, that they would seek joy in everything they do. And so, because one of our prayers is that they would stay close to each other, we did everything we could to shape environments that fostered connection with their siblings, with each other.   And that could look like we moved their rooms a lot of times, like who they shared with at different seasons of their life. We mixed them up with different brothers or different sisters, outings or trips where we would take just a couple of them, not all of them, but we mixed that up. You know, we never, ever, ever put up with disrespect or mistreatment of each other.   That one is a huge one, or their belongings for that matter. But that's so important not to allow your children to offer disrespect or display disrespect to their siblings. A lot of people think, oh, it's just their kid, you know, their siblings, they feel most comfortable with him.   That's totally normal, but it really does start at home. Another thing I think of is that we talked as a whole, our family as a team, as a unit. You know, we were a family unit.   It's not like one pitted against the other. We were on the same team. And although if my children were here, I am certain that one or more of them would say that they felt compared to at times, but we really did our best not to compare our children because comparison breeds rivalry faster than anything.   It really, really does. And we also tried to think about each individual child, you know, like, hey, this is your unique gift. This is your strength.   This is an asset, you know, an asset to the team, not just to you individually, but as a family as a whole. And the last thing I would say is everyone laughs because we had family A and then we had family B. And that's the first four kids and the second four kids.   And we taught them to serve each other. You know, the older kids were paired with the younger child, a younger sibling, and they had to help them. Sometimes it wasn't even help serving them, but it was doing a chore together.   We'll get to this later, I think. But chores are huge in our home. And when they turn nine, they have to mow the yard.   And we had we lived on three and a half acres. And so, we had a riding lawnmower. And when my nine-year-old son, my third son turned nine, he wasn't quite heavy enough to keep the mower going, you know, because you have to be heavy enough.   Otherwise, it shuts it off. And when he would lean to put his foot on the gas, it would shut it off. So, my three-year-old boy, his chore was to sit behind him and just hold on, you know, for the hour and a half it took him to mow the yard.   And, you know, we paired them together a lot. But at the end of the day, we can require respect, but we just can't force friendship. I have two daughters that are only 15 months apart.   When they were little, they were attached at the hip. I mean, where one went, the other one went. But now that they're older and they're both in college at the same college, their personalities are very different.   Their interests are very different. And they aren't as close as they once were, but they love each other. They respect each other.   And, you know, we just have to be OK with that, you know.   Laura Dugger: (14:02 - 14:40) That makes sense because there's different seasons to everything. I think you can see that with siblings who pair up with each other. And I'm sure that changes throughout their whole life.   Yeah, I want to go back. There's a few things that I want to follow up on. One of them was codependency with mothers and their children.   And the other one is already escaping me now. So, I'll try and recall that one. But can you share a little bit more of either why you think it is that way more today or what that might look like if we're codependent with our children and maybe unaware of that?   Elizabeth Pehrson: (14:41 - 16:35) All I can say is that I meet with women on a regular basis and 9.9 times out of ten there, they see their children as a reflection of themselves. So, when they make wise choices, they tend to tend to get puffed up. When they don't, they kind of bow back in shame or regret.   Or I can't believe this. But the truth of the matter is they are independent, you know, separate from you. And most moms don't know where they end and where the child begins.   We're entering graduation season. And I cannot tell you the number of moms that are like, “Oh, oh, this is so hard, this graduation thing.” And I'm like, but you're not graduating.   Like, you know, the kids have the responsibility of all the different things they have to do. But you don't. They've already you know, you've already graduated.   Let them enjoy this separate from you. But they can't do it. They're a part of every single aspect of their daughter or their son's life.   And when that happens, you know, every home run is so important. Every grade they make is so important. And I am all about long, long term, you know, long term parenting.   And it is not that it has nothing to do with a long-term person of character that they will become. So, if moms can see where they are separate, it is so beneficial for the child as well as the mom. You know, I met with a mom the other day and she's like, well, I'm not codependent, but my daughter is.   And I said, “Well, tell me more about this.” And she said, “Well, she calls me. She's in college and she calls me 10 times a day.”   And I said, “OK, well, let me ask you, how many times do you answer?” And she's kind of looked at me and she goes, “Well, she might need something.” And I said, “She can call back.”   She can text 911. But when you're so readily available to your child, it just fosters that dependency, you know, of your child on you. And it's so unhealthy.   Laura Dugger: (16:36 - 16:51) And I did hear a mom tell me one time when we, I think, had very little children. She said, “You want to ultimately work that dependency off of you and onto the Lord where they are first going to him, which is a lifelong job.”   Elizabeth Pehrson: (16:51 - 18:23) It is a lifelong job. There's a funeral service. It's going to sound morbid, but I watched it because it was so impactful to me.   I didn't even know this lady, but I watched it four times, this service that was online out of Florida. And the daughters were speaking and they said, “The best thing that they did, the very best thing that she did for them was to teach them their complete dependence on the Lord.” And she said, “She had cancer and she knew she was passing away.”   And she said, “Girls, don't be sad for me. I am going to be with my heavenly father rejoicing, singing his praises.” And she said, “If I have taught you to rely solely on me, then I've done a really bad job.”   I want your sole dependence to be on your heavenly father. But unfortunately, what I see again is just meeting with these women. We teach them that our presence is what keeps them safe or are, you know, being close proximity, especially with the cell phone.   You know, there's a lot of researchers that call it the longest umbilical cord because it keeps us in contact with him 24 seven. It's so sad. I mean, I interviewed some teachers at a middle school because they don't no longer allow cell phones.   You have to put it in the basket. Now there are some schools that are making you just not even bring it in. But I'm not even exaggerating when I tell you.   They would tell me that the children have two cell phones. The parents would give them two; one so they could put it in the basket and two so that the parents could be able to reach them at a moment's notice. Wow.   It's a real thing. I'm not making this up.   Laura Dugger: (18:24 - 18:26) That is crazy.   Elizabeth Pehrson: (18:26 - 18:59) Just to think in not that many years, how different that is from, you know, I ask moms all the time, would you have loved it if your mom had a low jack on you, like tracking your every move? I mean, because what happens is when you do that in middle school, high school, then they go off to college. I meet with moms every single day.   They're like, oh, my goodness, I'm so tired. I didn't go to bed till three o'clock last night. And I'm like, why?   Well, because I have like 360 on my child in college and she didn't get home till three, so I couldn't go to sleep. That's a normal everyday thing.   Laura Dugger: (19:01 - 19:38) Wow. And OK, for those situations, what would you recommend instead of that? And I guess if I could throw this in, I just was at a reunion with some graduate school friends, and we are all therapists or that's what we studied.   And we were just sharing how truly we've seen this play out. What we learned back in grad school was that if there's anxiety about something, avoidance never works. You have to even if it's micro dosing, you have to go through it rather than around it or avoid it.   Elizabeth Pehrson: (19:38 - 20:32) Oh, yes. And I mean, I'm sure you've read the book, The Most Anxious Generation of All Time. I mean, that's where we are.   And it stems, in my opinion, my humble opinion from the parents who are so anxious because they are codependent, because they are over involved in their children's life. And, you know, quite honestly, it's like the moms are so involved in their children's lives that when the last child leaves, you see the highest divorce rate is after the last emancipation of the last child. Once that child leaves, it's like, I have no life.   I have no identity. I have no purpose. And I certainly don't have relationship with my husband because my focus has been with my children.   And so, the moms that are anxious, the moms that are just so overbearing, over controlling are the ones that, in my opinion, are fostering those types of relationships with their children, the anxious ones. They can't do anything without their parents.   Laura Dugger: (20:33 - 22:06) And now a brief message from our sponsor, Sam Leman Chevrolet Eureka has been owned and operated by the Bertschi family for over 25 years. A lot has changed in the car business since Sam and Stephen's grandfather, Sam Leman, opened his first Chevrolet dealership over 55 years ago. If you visit their dealership today, though, you'll find that not everything has changed.   They still operate their dealership like their grandfather did with honesty and integrity. Sam and Stephen understand that you have many different choices in where you buy or service your vehicle. This is why they do everything they can to make the car buying process as easy and hassle free as possible.   They are thankful for the many lasting friendships that began with a simple Welcome to Sam Leman's. Their customers keep coming back because they experience something different. 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But I would say whatever that is, that has a hold on you, that you're still holding on to your 18, 19, 20, 21, 26-year-old child, whatever it is, they're adults. I mean, legally, they are adults at 18.   But yet whatever that is, that's holding you, keeping you attached to them, whether it's causing you to lose sleep, whether it's causing anxiety. You absolutely have to make that separation in that area. And so, you know, for the one that's got the Life360, 24 seven. Hey, give it to your husband.   You take it off your phone and they will be able to know how to figure out where your child is, should there be a need, you know, but you're hyper fixating on it, take that away. If it is a cell phone and you're calling your child every single day about everything, all that's doing is teaching your child that they can't do it on their own without you. And they have Google, you know, they have the Internet.   I didn't have that when I went away and I didn't have a cell phone, but I figured it out. So, it's like whatever it is that has a hold on you. I would encourage the mom just to make that separation in that one area and then start there.   Laura Dugger: (23:30 - 23:34) Love it. And I did think of the other thing that I wanted to circle back with.   Elizabeth Pehrson: (23:35 - 23:35) What is this?   Laura Dugger: (23:35 - 23:49) So, you had mentioned, yes, you taught your children respect one another in the home, but also respecting their belongings or property. Can you just share a little bit more of how you did that in your philosophy of why that was important?   Elizabeth Pehrson: (23:50 - 25:40) Oh, absolutely. I would tell you that David, my husband, and I firmly believe that respect for siblings, for coaches, for teachers, for peers, for their parents is hands down the foundation of every other principle that you can instill in your children, because if you respect them, you know, I mean, there are certain cultures and generations that respect their elderly. We're not a culture that does that.   And it's like if you respect them, you hold the door for them. You'll get up and give them your seat. You would never, you know, misuse their things, their belongings.   So, with the second that we saw any amount of disrespect, whether it was to us, like, say, if one of my children said something to me that was disrespectful, whether it was a tone, it might not have been the words. It could be a tone. It could be the volume of his voice, whatever it might be.   My husband would step in and say, “Hey, son. That's my wife. I don't allow anyone to speak like that to her.”   And then therefore, there would be like a consequence for it. And so, I mean, it might be that or at the risk of being too TMI or too vulgar. I had one son that had the urge to go to the bathroom, pee wherever he wanted to.   And one time he peed on his sister's blanket, her blankie, because he was mad at her. Let me tell you something. He will never forget it.   I don't remember what the punishment was at the time, but he got one. He never went to the bathroom anywhere again other than the toilet. You know, it's like, no, no, no, you cannot do that.   I mean, it's the foundation of the golden rule. You know, do unto others as you would have them do unto you. But children think they can get away with it.   And then parents justify it by saying, “Oh, but they're only three. Oh, but they're only six. Oh, they didn't really mean it.”   Well, you know what? That's where you've set the foundation right there. Three, five, six, whatever the age, so that when they grow up, they will respect their coaches, their employers, their teachers.   Laura Dugger: (25:40 - 25:55) You know, so good. OK, so another relational question, then what are ways that we can help or support positively shaping our children to have strong and healthy relationships with their friends?   Elizabeth Pehrson: (25:56 - 29:02) Yeah, I think that is such an important question. It was the very first verse we had our children memorize when they were itty bitty, you know, he who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm because research shows that we are the sum of the five people that we hang out with the most. So, who those five are in their circle, it is so important.   You know, it in our opinion, it is essential to model for our children what healthy friendships look like, because, again, they learn that by watching us. It goes back to what's caught, you know, not the top principle. And I think it's essential to have them around other children their own age as often as possible, because I think we can use friendship with their peers, not their parents, not their grandparents, but with peers.   Then we can use those examples and those situations to teach them to include others, to take turns, to read body language, to notice when something's wrong with one of your friends, right? To apologize. Ask for forgiveness too, hey, this one's doing something completely different than I would do, but let's celebrate that.   And a big one is navigating disappointment and hurt. You know, I mean, that's going to inevitably happen with our children and their friendships. So those roles are so important because we can use those experiences to help train and equip them.   You know, for us, our goal was never, ever, ever about popularity. Matter of fact, I don't even like the word. I don't like the you know what it stands for.   But for us, it was really just to focus on their character and the heart issues. So, because of that, we would ask them, you know, not who are you friends with and who do you know, but things like who did you include at lunch today? Did you notice anyone sitting alone?   Did you say anything to them? What kind friend or what kind of thing did you do for a friend today? And, you know, as far as like how we model that for our children and try to encourage that with them, it's going to cause a sacrifice on our end, right?   I mean, when we're allowing and I mean, we might have to take time driving them to, you know, a good friend's house that lives far away or it might be hosting events. It might be goodness. I mean, every mom knows that we've had to wait on our children and wait and wait and wait and whatever that looks like.   But, you know, just modeling that for our children and setting that environment and that groundwork so that they can have these friendships. It's going to be a sacrifice for every single mom. We can and we'll have to sacrifice our comfort.   We'll have to sacrifice our convenience. Right. A louder house, extra groceries, wet towels, muddy shoes like the list could go on and on and on.   But, you know, I know that there have been times when I would hope I would host things in my home, but I would rather be resting, you know, but I can't because I have a house full of 30 kids or staying home because there needs to be a parent there when I'd rather be out on a date with my husband. You know, there's lots of sacrifices that we're going to have to make. But I just think it's super, super important. That we do.   Laura Dugger: (29:03 - 29:25) Well, and I love hearing that side of it. I'm assuming you're such a both and person, too. What did you make sure that you didn't sacrifice?   Because I never hear you saying I only sacrificed for my kids so it could be better for them. But you were healthy all throughout raising them. So, does that make sense?   How did you balance your own?   Elizabeth Pehrson: (29:25 - 30:36) No, and I appreciate you saying that, but I'm certain that there were times when I was tired, when I was selfish and that I didn't do the wise thing. But I will say that that it is so important not to sacrifice yourself because, you know, you can hear it in the analogies of, you know, you can't you can't give what you don't have. You got to fill yourself up first.   And it's all true. You know, the oxygen mask on the airplane before you give it to your children, it's so important. But I equally think it's important for your children to see.   I'm not going to be at home at dinner tonight because you know what? I'm with my besties. I'm with my girlfriends tonight.   That is important to me. Loving one another and being with one another is spoken of more in scripture than parenting, more than marriage. I mean, it is spoken of over and over and over again.   So, I want them to see that, “Hey, tonight I'm going to sacrifice time at home and I'm going to go out, be with my girlfriends”. So, there's definitely some things you have to sacrifice. But I don't want a woman to be so depleted because she's constantly giving, giving, giving, giving, giving that again, when she when their children graduate and leave home, they don't even know who they are.   They've lost sight of who God created them to be.   Laura Dugger: (30:36 - 30:39) I appreciate your balance in that.   Elizabeth Pehrson: (30:39 - 30:41) It's always and in both.   Laura Dugger: (30:41 - 30:43) Yes, it really is.   Elizabeth Pehrson: (30:43 - 30:43) It is.   Laura Dugger: (30:44 - 30:53) How do you think we can help our kids uncover and articulate and pursue their purpose in life?   Elizabeth Pehrson: (30:54 - 32:55) Purpose is huge for me. I'm sure you know that. It's the name of my podcast.   It's why I started the exchange. But I have to tell you, I meet with women every single day, grown women, 40s, 50s, 60s, even 70s that still do not know their purpose. They don't know who they are.   So realistically, for our children, I don't want to have anyone, you know, mom beat themselves up because it does take time to help them understand, you know, who they are, why God put them here, what their purpose is. And I will say some of my kids will grasp it before others. You know, I have a son that just graduated UGA, and he still is contemplating, you know, what does God have for my life?   But as far as purpose goes, whether it's your young children, whether it's your high school children trying to figure out, do I go to college? Do I not go to college? You know, what do I major in?   All of those things. But for anyone, I want to say that it's important that they know their purpose is not what they do. But the why behind what they do.   And if someone is unsure of what that is or, you know, why they do something, I would encourage them to ask questions. That's my biggest thing. When I meet with women, when I talk with them, just ask questions, ask questions.   I mean, we don't have the answers, but to ask questions. And so, I'll ask my children, you know, when they're contemplating some of these things, “Hey, what makes you come alive? What lights you up?”   You know, who do you love to serve? What could you do for hours, hours, and hours and lose track of time? For an older woman, I would say, what did you love to do as a child?   You know, maybe what do other people say to you? Man, you make that look effortless. You are so good at fill in the blank.   What keeps you up at night? What breaks your heart? I think the answer to all of those questions lead us ultimately to what God uniquely put in our hearts to do and how he created us.   You know, when he created each one of us, he gave us something that he wants us to offer to the world. And whatever that is, I would say will lead you to your purpose.   Laura Dugger: (32:56 - 33:00) And do you have yours articulated that you want to share with us?   Elizabeth Pehrson: (33:00 - 34:41) Oh, it took me a long time to go, God, who did you create me to be? And asking some of those questions, it's so interesting. So, you know, I speak, I speak, you know, at the exchange and in the last 10 years, I've started speaking more at churches and other places, and it's my absolute favorite thing to do.   It lights me up. I find great joy in it. It comes natural to me.   And one day when I was asking this woman, I'm like, let me ask you, what did you love to do as a child? Like, what could you just do for hours and hours? And she's like, well, I don't know.   Can you give me some examples? And she said, what did you love to do? And it was like this light bulb went off.   And my mom was very, very, very girly. And I had three older brothers. I was not.   And my mom wanted me to be very girly. So, she would give me for every birthday, Christmas, Easter, Flag Day. It didn't matter what the holiday.   I got a Madame Alexander doll. It's this doll that has it's like on a stand and it just sits there like you don't play with it. You don't you just look at it.   I don't know the purpose of these dolls. I don't know why anyone would want one. But when I tell you I had 100 of them, I literally had 100 of them.   And so, when I was thinking back to what did I love to do as a child instinctively, no one told me to do it. I would get home after school, and I would pull out all of these dolls and I would put them on my bed and I would line them up and I would talk to them. I would tell them all about my day, what I learned, what someone taught me, the injustices of being the only girl in the family, what I'm going to do when I'm older.   And I literally that's what I did for hours. And it was like this light bulb went off. It's like God put that in me.   I was encouraging my dolls. I was talking to them. I was, you know, hopefully motivating them, inspiring them.   Obviously, they couldn't move. But that's what I do now. And encouraging women is my purpose.   Laura Dugger: (34:42 - 35:27) I love that story so much. That's amazing. Do you love The Savvy Sauce?   Do you gain anything when you listen? Did you know that the two ways we earn money to keep this podcast live is through generous contributions from listeners and from our paying sponsors? That means we can promote your business and you're still supporting The Savvy Sauce.   It's a win-win. Please email us today at info@theSavvySauce.com to inquire about pricing for sponsoring each episode. Thank you for your consideration.   Elizabeth, do you have any tips for how we can influence our children to become lifelong learners?   Elizabeth Pehrson: (35:28 - 39:29) Yes, I think it's super important to encourage that in your children. But I also don't think there's a formula for it because some children are naturally more curious. Some are naturally more inquisitive.   I do think it's super important to recognize that, you know, what it is that they want to learn. They want to study because it's going to be different for your children. So, you might not think that they're a learner or someone that's curious, but they're just not curious about what you're curious about.   Right. My oldest son reads a biography of presidents and historical figures all the time. He tries to get through one a week.   I couldn't think of more boring reading, but he loves, loves it. He just takes it all in. He knows all the facts and stats on presidents.   But what's funny is when he was two years old, he could name all of the presidents in order at two years old. I couldn't even do it. I had to hold up the placemat to make sure, you know, that he was right.   I have another son that studies history, loves it, just absolutely loves it. And I have a daughter who probably the one that's most like me. But I will tell you that she will be a lifelong learner of people the rest of her life.   That is her passion. She's curious. She's inquisitive.   She's always asking questions of people. And as long as we know that ultimately, it's just going to be up to them. Some are going to be great learners.   Naturally, others won't be. But I would say if you wanted me to point to something again, it just comes back to modeling it, you know, for our children, because children copy what we love, not what we lecture. They copy what we love, not what we lecture every single time.   And I remember when one time when my kids were little, they wanted me to plant a garden. And I don't know what the opposite of a green thumb is, but that's what I have. I'm like the opposite of that.   And I had no idea. Like, you dig up the grass, you till the soil. Like, when do you plant?   How do you even grow a vegetable? I had no idea. But I said, “You know what? I don't know how to do this, but let's figure it out together.”   We'll figure it out together. And, you know, I suggest that moms would say things to their kids like, I just listened to this podcast, and it really challenged my thinking.   I had never thought of it this way before. Or I don't know anything about that topic you want to talk about, but let's find out, let's dive in and look, go to the library or, you know, whatever it might be. And lastly, I would just say that it really comes down to praising effort, not performance, because if you're saying you're so smart, you know so much about that or you're so wise in that area.   It really is. It doesn't do them anything other than teach them a performance based. Right.   So, it's like I want to say the things the things to them. Like, I am so proud of you when you didn't know what you were doing. You stuck with it.   You figured it out because I think that is a growth mindset instead of like instead of driving in performance anxiety. Like, I don't know how to do this. I didn't figure it out.   I can't. You know, we really want them like, hey, I don't know what it is, but I'll figure it out. You know, and I just think when learning really becomes about grades, achievement, success, whatever it is, curiosity dies, does.   So, it's like at the dinner table. I remember David and I would ask questions of the kids, and we would ask them things like, what did you fail at today? Like, what did you mess up today?   Like, what surprised you today that you didn't know yesterday? And then David and I would share as well. Like, let me tell you what I learned.   Let me tell you where I messed up at work. And it's just important to normalize not having all the answers. You know, one of our big parenting mantras is don't bail, let them fail.   And I think it is so important because we don't want to rescue our children. You know, we want them to not know how to do something so that they can figure it out and then just learn as they go. You know, because that's really where confidence grows.   It grows through problem solving and learning things the hard way.   Laura Dugger: (39:30 - 40:01) Wow, there's so much there. I love I'll kind of summarize a few things. So being curious ourselves, modeling it, having our own interests and sharing those ideas, but I hear this theme of questions, asking our kids questions.   I think that develops critical thinking. But then you helped identify with them what their interests were. And I think that will naturally lead to being a lifelong learner if we find what we're interested in.   You said all of your kids might be different once they found that. They'll probably be lifelong learners in those areas.   Elizabeth Pehrson: (40:01 - 40:32) For sure. And I guess what I meant by some or more so than others like my first born, he is a five on the Enneagram. And so, his he wants to know how everything works and studies it and researches it for hours before he makes a decision where I have some other children that are like, you know, instead of ready, set, go, it's more like go, set, ready, you know, and I'll figure it out later.   I don't care. But he's just naturally more inquisitive to want to know how things work. What makes things tick?   Why does the world work the way it works? You know, that kind of thing.   Laura Dugger: (40:33 - 40:44) Well, I don't know if this goes together or if you would share something different. But do you think there are any ways that we can help our children recognize and utilize their spiritual gifts?   Elizabeth Pehrson: (40:46 - 44:02) Yeah, when I think about spiritual gifts, I kind of think it goes back to the purpose question that we talked about earlier. You know, again, I know a lot of adults that don't know their spiritual gifts yet. They're still questioning.   They're still I'm not really sure is it this or this or I don't know where to lean in. And it's hard for parents to help their children find their spiritual gifts when they don't know theirs, you know, or they don't know how God wired them or what he placed deep inside of them. But one thing that I would offer when you're trying to help your children with that is just as parents just notice things about your children, but notice them out loud.   What God's already doing in your children, notice them out loud, speak them out loud, like pay attention. Which child comforts the crying sibling who organizes the game so that everybody feels included? Who asks deep questions about faith or which child senses when someone, you know, is left out?   You know, those are all clues as to how God wired them and what's deep inside of them. And, you know, you can say things as simple as you know, you know, I noticed you have a gift for encouragement. You really are so good at that.   Or, hey, you know what? You notice what other people miss. That's amazing.   How do you do that? God is always giving you courage. You know, I have a son named Josh, and he's got this big Joshua one nine frame in his, you know, Bible verse in his room.   It's like God has given you a spirit of fear and but of courage and of sound mind, you know, and it's like we try to speak that courage into him or, you know, I have one son that always keeps us organized and on track. And we used to call him the traffic cop because he was always like this. But then I was like, no, that doesn't really speak life into him.   It's more of a judge. So, we were like, you know what? You are so organized.   You keep us on track. And I think when kids hear out loud like their strengths name, they begin to see them as gifts rather than just like, oh, that's just how I am. That's a person that, you know, personality court.   And as you're trying to speak those things out loud and let them see and notice things about themselves that maybe they didn't see. You can also give them opportunities to practice things like, hey, at the dinner table, you're going to pray out loud tonight for the family, for our meal, or, hey, I'd like you to help lead with our family dinner devotions or hey, you know what? I'm going to go serve this weekend at this project.   And I really want you to come alongside me and go with me. Maybe, hey, you know what? I noticed this younger sibling really needs encouragement today.   Could you just go and speak some encouragement to her? You know, handwritten notes. That's a big one in our family.   You know, literally handwritten notes, not just by a card and signing it. Love, Josh, you know, but to write out. And I think that's something that we can instill in our kids because that's a lost art.   But, you know, most importantly, more than any of that, I would say to remind your kids this gift, this spiritual gift that God has given you isn't for you. It's for someone else. Right.   A person of purpose, a hero, whatever you want to call it, is a person who takes who they are with what they have for the benefit of someone else. That's it. It's just like who they are with what they have for the benefit of someone else.   And when you do that, there's always a gift that you can offer somebody else.   Laura Dugger: (44:04 - 44:15) Well, in another biblical topic, we know that it's a biblical command to be hospitable. So, were there any specific ways that you trained your children in hospitality?   Elizabeth Pehrson: (44:16 - 46:33) Yeah. Hospitality was my mom's ultimate gift. It was probably the thing that she modeled the best for my brothers and for me.   We hosted foreign exchange students for months at a time. Every single Sunday. People don't believe me when I tell them this, but it's true.   Every single Sunday, we would invite a family home from church to have lunch with us that we did not know. It was never somebody that we knew. And so, on Saturday, we would prepare the house.   We would prepare the yard. We would cook the food as a family. Everybody had a role in it.   And then my dad would literally find a family that we did not know. And he would invite them home. And my parents always had their home open for Bible studies, for parties, for small groups, whatever, and whomever needed a space.   They made our home available. And I've just tried to do that for my children in my own ways because it looks very differently than, you know, the way my mom did it. But I basically think hospitality is simply just making room.   That's it. It's just making room, whether it's making room at your table, whether it's making room in your home. You know, a lot of moms are perfectionists, and they associate perfection with it.   My home's not clean enough. My home's not pretty enough. It's not perfect enough.   And so, then they don't want to do it. But I can just tell you honestly, with eight children, perfect wasn't an option, you know, anyway, but we did. We had an open-door policy for dinner.   We even had a sign on our garage door. It said dinner's at 6:30. All are welcome.   And so, anybody could come and show up to dinner any night of the week at 6:30. And all of our children, when we invited people over, everybody had to participate, not just those that were excited about it, but like the whole family, you know, whether it was setting the table, greeting the guests at the door, making eye contact and then asking them questions, clearing plates. I mean, just whatever it is.   We wanted every single person to be a part of it. And really, we just tried to say, hey, you know, this is going to cost you something, because sometimes generosity does. You might have to squeeze in at the dinner table and sit like this because we're all squeezed in and that's OK.   Or you might have three air mattresses on your floor tonight and you have to share your room. And I know you don't want to, but that's OK. I mean, it's like generosity is going to cost you something.   And we wanted our kids to know that.   Laura Dugger: (46:34 - 46:47) Oh, such great examples. And do you have any other additional tips for ways that all of our family can actually delight in the abundant life that Christ has, that he's offered each one of us?   Elizabeth Pehrson: (46:49 - 48:59) Yeah, I mean, again, I certainly do not have all the answers, and we could have made service projects and serving others more of a priority in our home, for sure. But I just I think that the abundant life in Jesus it is about serving others. It is about offering others what he's given you.   And, you know, we don't serve to earn love like we serve because we're already loved. I mean, that's really the bottom line. And that changes everything.   And so, I would just encourage families to start serving together, not as a punishment, you know, not as a obligation, but just as a way of life. It's what we do. It's who we are.   And so, because of that, the abundant life for us offering it to others looked like making meals, making cupcakes, making a cake and delivering it to people. We had elderly neighbors all in our street and we mowed their yards. We picked up pinecones.   We went to the grocery store and picked up their medicine for them. You know, we made, again, handwritten notes and cards, just very small, easy, tangible, ordinary things that we could do to love on others. And I would say, let them see your joy in what you're doing, because they children do not like drudgery.   They're just going to resist it. Right. It's like but if they see you delighting and feeling full, full after serving and then giving, they appreciate you know, they appreciate that they see the joy.   And so, it's just it's important. I just think all the way around just there's Andy Stanley always says, you know, following God's principles will make your life better and it will make your life make you better at life. And so, when we follow these principles, when we serve, when we celebrate the kids serving other people with a joyful heart, you know, we celebrate their impact, not their performance, not how grand it was, not how big it was.   But hey, you made someone feel loved today. That's a really big deal. That's a really big thing.   You're eight years old. Not everybody can do that. And I am so grateful that you love Jesus so much that you would be willing to do that.   So, I just think the abundant life comes from following God's principles. You know, it's not having more. It's just loving more.   Laura Dugger: (49:00 - 49:14) Oh, love it. You have so much wisdom to share. So, before we press pause on this conversation, because we get to continue again next week, will you just let us know where we can go in the meantime to learn more from you?   Elizabeth Pehrson: (49:15 - 49:38) Oh, sure. If someone would like to follow me, it's on Instagram. I have my own personal one.   It's called @octomama. My kids made that long time ago. I also have the @theexchangeus.   That is that's my Instagram handle there. And then a long game parenting, writing a parenting book. And so, I do have a handle for that where I post things.   But it's called @long_game_parenting. So, yeah, wonderful.   Laura Dugger: (49:38 - 49:56) We'll link to all of that in the show notes for today's episode. And Elizabeth, this is your third time on The Savvy Sauce. So, you already know we're called The Savvy Sauce because savvy is synonymous with practical knowledge.   And so is my final question for you today. What is your Savvy Sauce?   Elizabeth Pehrson: (49:56 - 50:36) I would say in light of our conversation today and in light of what I talked about and shared, it's so simple. It's just 12 words. I say it all the time.   Think what you want your kids to be and then be it. Think what you want your kids to be and then be it. And I don't mean this in terms of your career or your profession, you know, but I mean in terms of modeling for our children what we want to impress upon their heart, things of character, because the truth is, it goes back to that.   We can only take our children as far as we've gone ourselves, or we can only help our children as far as we've done the work ourselves emotionally, mentally, spiritually and physically. So, think what you want your kids to be and then be it.   Laura Dugger: (50:37 - 50:46) What a beautiful way to close out our time together today. As always, Elizabeth, you are just effervescent and time flies by when we're having conversations together.   Elizabeth Pehrson: (50:47 - 50:49) I talk fast, so thanks for saying that.   Laura Dugger: (50:50 - 50:52) Well, thank you for being my guest.   Elizabeth Pehrson: (50:52 - 50:55) Absolutely. I thoroughly enjoyed it. Thanks, Laura.   Laura Dugger: (50:56 - 54:10) One more thing before you go.   Have you heard the term gospel before? It simply means good news. And I want to share the best news with you.   But it starts with the bad news. Every single one of us were born sinners, but Christ desires to rescue us from our sin, which is something we cannot do for ourselves. This means there's absolutely no chance we can make it to heaven on our own.   So, for you and for me, it means we deserve death and we can never pay back the sacrifice we owe to be saved. We need a savior. But God loved us so much.   He made a way for his only son to willingly die in our place as the perfect substitute. This gives us hope of life forever in right relationship with him. That is good news.   Jesus lived the perfect life we could never live and died in our place for our sin. This was God's plan to make a way to reconcile with us so that God can look at us and see Jesus. We can be covered and justified through the work Jesus finished if we choose to receive what he has done for us.   Romans 10:9 says, that if you confess with your mouth Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. So, would you pray with me now? Heavenly Father, thank you for sending Jesus to take our place.   I pray someone today right now is touched and chooses to turn their life over to you. Will you clearly guide them and help them take their next step in faith to declare you as Lord of their life? We trust you to work and change lives now for eternity.   In Jesus name we pray. Amen. If you prayed that prayer, you are declaring him for me, so me for him.   You get the opportunity to live your life for him. And at this podcast, we're called The Savvy Sauce for a reason. We want to give you practical tools to implement the knowledge you have learned.   So, you ready to get started? First, tell someone. Say it out loud.   Get a Bible. The first day I made this decision, my parents took me to Barnes & Noble and let me choose my own Bible. I selected the Quest NIV Bible and I love it.   You can start by reading the book of John. Also, get connected locally, which just means tell someone who's a part of a church in your community that you made a decision to follow Christ. I'm assuming they will be thrilled to talk with you about further steps such as going to church and getting connected to other believers to encourage you.   We want to celebrate with you too, so feel free to leave a comment for us here if you did make a decision to follow Christ. We also have show notes included where you can read scripture that describes this process. And finally, be encouraged.   Luke 15:10 says, in the same way I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents. The heavens are praising with you for your decision today. And if you've already received this good news, I pray you have someone to share it with.   You are loved and I look forward to meeting you here next time.

Christa welcomes the beloved Beatrice Chestnut, one of the most respected voices in the Enneagram world, for a rich conversation on the three centers of intelligence, the body, the heart, and the head, and how each one shapes the way we love, fight, and connect in relationships. So much of what we wrongly ask our spouse to carry comes from the parts of ourselves we have not yet done our own work on, and Bea's teaching gives us a map for exactly that work. Together they explore how most of us lead from one center while neglecting the others, often without realizing it, and the blind spots that creates between two people trying to love each other well. They look at how a body-led, a heart-led, and a head-led partner can so easily misread one another, why meeting your spouse in their center rather than expecting them to move to yours is essential, and how the passions beneath our types quietly drive the same fights on repeat. This pivotal conversation offers a way to see yourself and your spouse with more compassion, and to stop handing your partner what was always yours to tend. This is a meaningful part of this month's series on what our spouses were never meant to hold. Listen here! Watch on YouTube! Get inside the Enneagram and Marriage Coaching and Masterclass classroom here! https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/the-e-m-coaching-masterclass Find more about your type, the pod, freebies, and SO much more at our website right here! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.EnneagramandMarriage.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Take the E + M Quiz at www.QuizforCouples.com ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ here!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Get Christa's Best-Selling Book, The Enneagram in Marriage, here! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://a.co/d/df8SxVx Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What if understanding why you lead the way you do could transform how you connect with your team? Certified Enneagram coach and salon owner Jennifer Culverhouse reveals how the Enneagram goes beyond surface-level behaviors to uncover the motivations, strengths, fears, and patterns driving each of us. Discover how greater self-awareness can help salon and spa owners navigate conflict, appreciate different personalities, and recognize when their greatest strengths become leadership blind spots. You'll walk away encouraged to move beyond autopilot, lead with conscious intention, and view the people who challenge you as opportunities for growth.   WATCH ON YOUTUBE: https://youtu.be/A0FaH65dM4k   GET MY BOOK! From First Date to Forever; How to Market Like A Matchmaker: https://joinmya.com/from-first-date-to-forever-book   POWERED BY: JOIN mya! https://joinmya.com   FOLLOW JENNIFER CULVERHOUSE Website: https://myportal.summitsalon.com/course/enneagram-series-jennifer-culverhouse Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jennifer_enneagram_guide   LET'S CONNECT! BTT Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/beyondthetechnique MYA Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/join_mya   FOLLOW KATI WHITLEDGE Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/katiwhitledge Get my favorite bio-hacking products: https://www.best365labs.com/?ref=tojxxlga   SPONSORS In-Person Masterclass for Salon Owners: Register now to take advantage of the early bird savings! Go to http://eventbrite.com/e/roadmap-to-salon-success-an-in-person-masterclass-for-salon-owners-tickets-1990691675389 Join the PBA: https://www.probeauty.org

I'm so glad to welcome back my friend Kim O for her third appearance on the show. Kim is a relational soul coach and author who works directly with ROGD-affected teens and their parents — one of a very small handful of people doing work that closely mirrors my own. In this conversation, we dig into what it actually looks like to believe in your child's soul when everything about their behavior is screaming at you to panic.Kim shares how shifting from fear and worry energy to genuine belief in her own son's potential transformed their relationship — and how she now coaches families to do the same. We explore what I call strategic and what Kim calls clever: non-threatening, indirect approaches that plant seeds of growth without triggering the ego defenses that gender ideology has shored up in these kids. We talk about the power of fun and play in rebuilding connection, the danger of suggestion-based parenting, setting real boundaries around devices, and why personality typing tools like the Enneagram can actually give girls a healthier outlet for the same identity-seeking impulse that gender ideology exploits. Kim also introduces her new parent and teen workbook journals, designed to create structured moments of connection and self-reflection for families who don't know where to begin.Kim O is a Relational Soul Coach and author. She utilizes Conscious Principles, Presence, and Authenticity Mapping to awaken you to your greatest power, your Conscious Authentic Self. Through inner child work and profound mindset strategies from the stoics and sages, unhealthy coping mechanisms diminish, leaving your empowerment and high relational intelligence in the wake. As a coach, she provides personal, alchemical stories of trauma turned into gold. If she did it, so can you! Contact and find her resources at linktr.ee/heartworkuKim's workbooks:My Role as the Parent of a Teen: a Journal that Guides YOU to Lead & Create ConnectionWho Am I? a Teen's Journal of Self-Celebration & Connection [00:00:00] Start[00:02:10] Shifting From Fear to Belief Energy[00:06:45] Celebrating Teens and the Teen Brain[00:10:15] The Weekly Check-In and Connect[00:16:15] Practicing Belief When Your Kid Is Nasty[00:20:35] Rupture, Repair, and Strategic Apologizing[00:25:00] Untangling Emotion From Gender Identity[00:32:15] Parents Who Never Rebelled[00:35:00] Rebellion as the Spirit of Adventure[00:40:00] Guilt, Self-Forgiveness, and Planting Seeds[00:45:00] Social Media and the Immature Brain[00:49:06] Fun, Play, and Suggestion-Based Parenting[00:55:45] Chores, Boredom, and Preparing for the Road[01:01:00] What Is the Role of the Teen and Parent[01:07:53] Coaching Under a Different Name[01:11:19] Personality Typing as an Alternative to Gender[01:18:15] Myers-Briggs and Breaking Gender StereotypesROGD REPAIR Course + Community gives concerned parents instant access to over 120 lessons providing the psychological insights and communication tools you need to get through to your kid. Now featuring 24/7 personalized AI support implementing the tools with RepairBot! Use code SOMETHERAPIST2026 to take 50% off your first month.PODCOURSES: use code SOMETHERAPIST at LisaMustard.com/PodCoursesPRODUCTION: Looking for your own podcast producer? Visit PodsByNick.com and mention my podcast for 20% off your initial services.MUSIC: Thanks to Joey Pecoraro for our song, “Half Awake,” used with gratitude & permission. ALL OTHER LINKS HERE. To support this show, please leave a rating & review on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. Subscribe, like, comment & share via my YouTube channel. Or recommend this to a friend!Learn more about Do No Harm.Take $200 off your EightSleep Pod Pro Cover with code SOMETHERAPIST at EightSleep.com.Take 20% off all superfood beverages with code SOMETHERAPIST at Organifi.Check out my shop for book recommendations + wellness products.Show notes & transcript provided with the help of SwellAI.Special thanks to Joey Pecoraro for our theme song, “Half Awake,” used with gratitude and permission.Watch NO WAY BACK: The Reality of Gender-Affirming Care (our medical ethics documentary, formerly known as Affirmation Generation). Stream the film or purchase a DVD. Use code SOMETHERAPIST to take 20% off your order. Follow us on X @2022affirmation or Instagram at @affirmationgeneration.Have a question for me? Looking to go deeper and discuss these ideas with other listeners? Join my Locals community! Members get to ask questions I will respond to in exclusive, members-only livestreams, post questions for upcoming guests to answer, plus other perks TBD. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Episode Description In this episode of What If? For Authors, Claire explores one of the main character-development problems writers face: What if I don't know my antagonist? Claire breaks down the true purpose of an antagonist and, using the Enneagram, shows how understanding your protagonist can help you identify the kind of antagonist who will create the most compelling conflict.   In This Episode, You'll Learn What an antagonist's actual job is in a story Why your antagonist doesn't have to be a villain How the clash between protagonist and antagonist creates narrative energy Why you need to understand your protagonist before choosing an antagonist How the Enneagram can help you identify the right antagonist for your story How a character's core fears can reveal the conflict they most need to face How different Enneagram types interact and trigger one another When using the same Enneagram type for protagonist and antagonist can work Why certain character pairings may struggle to create the conflict required by specific tropes The three possible outcomes of protagonist-antagonist conflict: defeat, overcoming, and integration How to use your antagonist to push your protagonist toward growth Questions to ask when you're stuck trying to figure out who your antagonist should be Resources Mentioned Write Iconic Relationships Kickstarter Claire's upcoming book explores the dynamics between different Enneagram types and how those relationships can be used to create compelling enemies, friendships, romances, and more. The Kickstarter launches August 25 and runs through September 10.https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/ffsmedia/write-iconic-relationships Write Iconic Characters books2read.com/WIC Liberated Writer (Coaching & Courses) liberatedwriter.com Liberated Writer Substack liberatedwriter.substack.com Support the Show If this episode gave you something to reflect on, here are a few ways to support the podcast: Leave a review on your favorite platform - it helps other authors find the show. Share this episode with an author who's navigating similar challenges. Subscribe to Claire's Substack for deeper insights on writing, the industry, and the author life. Happy writing!

This lively and enlightening conversation features Cassandra Pickett, a certified CliniCoach, licensed therapist, and host of the "Girl, You Good?" podcast. Cassandra joins us to discuss the complexities of identity that hinder ambitious women.Cassandra shares her own transformative journey and the challenges of living authentically in a world that often demands people-pleasing and perfection. Together, we explore why so many high-achieving women struggle with self-alignment, how to redefine self-compassion, and why reclaiming an identity like “bitch” can be a revolutionary act of empowerment. Are you ready for candid truths, actionable insights, and a celebration of coming home to yourself?

Read the full transcript here. Why do people gravitate toward self-help that reinforces the strategies they already use well? How can we identify the default lens through which we interpret nearly every situation? What changes when we recognize that our internal equilibrium may be less dependent on circumstances than we assume? Can personality systems be useful even when their categories are imperfect or partly invented? Does the Enneagram reveal genuine psychological structure, or merely offer memorable language for patterns we already recognize? What does it mean to see and act on degrees of freedom that other people overlook? How many apparent constraints are really social scripts that no one has tested? Why can one person's decision to act instantly dissolve the bystander effect for everyone else? Is high agency genuinely associated with antisocial traits, or does selection bias merely make that correlation appear stronger? How can people violate norms from courage and care rather than narcissism or indifference? Which fears—failure, embarrassment, rejection, or identity loss—most sharply restrict our sense of possibility? Can low-stakes exposure to rejection teach us that asking is less dangerous than anticipation makes it feel? What ambitious requests might succeed simply because nobody else thought to make them? How does agency expand a life without reducing it to achievement, status, or relentless effort? Cate Hall is an author and writer focused on personal agency. Her book, You Can Just Do Things, helps readers learn how to take action and shape their lives. Links: Cate's Book: You Can Just Do Things Cate's Website Staff Spencer Greenberg — Host + Director Ryan Kessler — Producer + Technical Lead WeAmplify — Transcriptionists Igor Scaldini — Marketing Consultant Music Broke for Free Josh Woodward Lee Rosevere Quiet Music for Tiny Robots wowamusic zapsplat.com Affiliates Clearer Thinking GuidedTrack Mind Ease Positly UpLift [Read more]

The short answer...no. But what will change is your expression of your type aka your behavior. If you want to learn more about this question, tune into this week's episode! Enneagram MBA Resources + Links:Learn more about the 3-part Dream Team Momentum program: enneagrammba.com/enneagram-team-workshopsRun your own Enneagram Workshop: enneagrammba.com/enneagram-workshop-kitConnect with Sarah on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/sarahlynnwallace/Take the 2-question Enneagram quiz: enneagrammba.com/blog/enneagramtestWork with Sarah - workshops, speaking, and team facilitation: enneagrammba.com/enneagram-speakerHave a request for a future episode? Drop a text here! 

What can the Enneagram teach us about sensitivity, social justice, and our unique calling?  In this conversation, our special guest, Dorcas Cheng-Tozun, speaks about the challenges faced by Enneagram Fours and highly sensitive people. Drawing from her book Social Justice for the Sensitive Soul, Dorcas reflects on belonging, burnout, and emotional wounds. She offers us sustainable ways to pursue justice.   Also in this episode, Fr. Richard Rohr offers wisdom on the Four's gift of seeing beyond conformity and invites Type Fours to turn their suffering outward in solidarity with others.   Tune in to discover how our authenticity, purpose, and gifts can serve the world.  Find the transcript for today's episode here. Sign Up for The Enneagram Email Series  Deepen your journey with the Enneagram. Sign up for monthly reflections, practices, and resources that connect the contemplative wisdom with your daily life. https://cac.org/belongs2026/ Additional Enneagram Resources The Enneagram: An Introduction: A brief introduction to this tool and a compilation of different resources curated for those longing to better understand and have compassion for themselves and others.  Enneagram as a Tool for Your Spiritual Journey: Use the offer code POD35 to get 35% off this foundational Enneagram teaching from Fr. Richard Rohr and Episode 2 guest Russ Hudson.  The Enneagram & Grace: Richard Rohr and Russ Hudson offer a deep study of the Enneagram as a practice to nurture transformation for ourselves and compassion for the world. Use POD35 to get 35% off your order.  Follow us on Instagram. How can your wounds lead to wisdom? Discover topics about what your number might be trying to teach you.  Join the conversation on Facebook. Share wisdom with others on the Enneagram journey.   Pick up a copy of Fr. Richard's book The Enneagram: A Christian Perspective.  Connect With Us Have a question you'd like ask the team to answer about this season?  Email us: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠podcasts@cac.org⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠  Send us a voicemail: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠cac.org/voicemail⁠⁠⁠⁠ 

Courtney, owner of Declet Designs, didn't build a thriving web design business by trying to serve everyone. She built it by going deep into one very specific world: weight-inclusive dietitians and therapists (and, more recently, midwives and doulas) — and refusing to be anything other than exactly what they needed.In this episode, Courtney and Michelle talk about why that narrow focus, not a broader one, is what made her successful. As Courtney puts it, "I would not have been successful if I just went out and was like, I do websites for everyone." Because she's a dietitian and eating disorder survivor herself, she could speak her clients' language in a way a generalist designer never could — down to the word choices, the imagery, and the marketing approach that would actually make their audience feel safe.It's a conversation about the real payoff of specificity: less convincing, more trust, and a business that grows because of who it doesn't try to serve._____About CourtneyCourtney Vickery, MS, RD, LD is a multi-passionate entrepreneur in the weight-inclusive space. She's an anti-diet dietitian and Certified Intuitive Eating Counselor with her own private practice, Vickery Wellness. She is also the CEO of Declet Designs, her website and branding studio for weight-inclusive businesses.She has a double dose of knowledge, with bachelor's degrees in political science and dietetics, plus a Master's degree in Foods & Nutrition from the University of Georgia (and still teaches an undergraduate course there).Her career journey includes working as a Director of Corporate Health Services & Community Outreach, clinical dietitian, managing group fitness programs and community health programs, and roles in healthcare administration and corporate health. She's even stepped in as the Interim Director of the Dietetic Internship at the University of Georgia.At home, Courtney shares life with her husband of 15 years (they've been together since high school!), two kids, a dog named Oliver, and two kitty cats, Finnick and Calliope. She is the perfect blend of Enneagram 1 determination and a laid-back coffee shop aficionado. When she's not helping therapists and dietitians rock their brands and websites, you can catch her chilling at a coffee shop, sipping tea, or spending time with her awesome family.Her passion for blending her love for weight-inclusive care with her knack for web and branding design makes her your friendly expert in dietetics and web design. Find Courtney at https://decletdesigns.com 

Most Enneagram teaching is very good at describing what's wrong with you. This episode is about what's right. Every Enneagram type has a Passion — the chief emotional distortion the ego runs when it's disconnected from its truest self. Anger for the One. Pride for the Two. Deceit for the Three. Each of the nine types has one, and most of us have spent a lot of energy trying to manage ours without quite knowing what it is. But every type also has a Virtue. Not a moral achievement you add on top — a quality that naturally arises in the heart when the Passion loosens its grip. Serenity. Humility. Authenticity. Equanimity. Non-Attachment. Courage. Sobriety. Innocence. Right Action. These aren't things you build. They're things that emerge when you stop being in the way of yourself. In this final episode of the Enneagram Essentials series, Anthony and I walk through all nine Passions and their corresponding Virtues. I share what Equanimity feels like in my own life as a Four — when I manage to access it — and we close with two honest answers to the question of how any of this actually becomes real: contemplative practice, and a particular kind of willingness to stop running from pain. This is a hopeful episode. Everything in the series has been building toward this. The Enneagram has always been pointing here.   This is Episode 5 of 5 in the Enneagram Essentials series. All five episodes are available now wherever you listen to Typology.   RESOURCES FROM THIS EPISODE:  The Road Back to You by Ian Morgan Cron  The Story of You by Ian Morgan Cron Enneagram Assessment | Find Your Type Ian's speaking and organizational work   Follow Ian on Instagram | Facebook | TikTok | YouTube 

This week Christa welcomes Linda Hannigan, 3 (3-1 pairing), an Enneagram and Marriage certified coach, gifted orator, and truth teller whose candor and artistry make her a joy to learn from. Together they continue the August question of what our spouses can and cannot carry for us, and where our deeper needs actually belong. Linda brings her signature honesty, willing to talk openly about the strengths and the tender places in her own marriage, even as she helps us tend our spiritual lives along the way. They explore how we so often hand our spouse longings that were never theirs to hold, why bringing those deeper needs to God and to a wider community brings such freedom, and how truth telling, done with grace, actually draws a couple closer rather than driving them apart. It is a rich, warm, and honest conversation. Listen here! Watch on YouTube! Find Linda's coaching website: https://www.9lumens.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/9lumens/ Watch Linda's Galatians sermon: https://youtu.be/j6B9vsq5f7I?si=jIGcPIfnZd9meoCL Find more about your type, the pod, freebies, and SO much more at our website right here! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.EnneagramandMarriage.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Take the E + M Quiz at www.QuizforCouples.com ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ here!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Get Christa's Best-Selling Book, The Enneagram in Marriage, here! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://a.co/d/df8SxVx Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Back in May, I was on a Zoom with my friend Jill Carr, mapping out where this podcast is headed in 2026 and 2027, when something clicked. Not a big dramatic moment. Just that quiet click where somebody sees something about you that you're too close to see yourself, and the fog lifts. Then I got off the call and went right back into the middle of a website rebuild, a personal brand strategy session, a discovery call with a stranger, and a late night typing my Human Design and Enneagram into Claude trying to figure out who I even am these days. That's what rebuilding a business actually looks like. Not the shiny, wrapped-with-a-bow version I usually give you after the lessons are learned. This week I'm taking you into the messy middle while I'm still in it: four things I've been doing since April to lead myself, stay curious, get creative, and define my core. What You'll Hear Why I decided to rebuild Molly Knuth Media in April after my role at The Restoration Project came to a close What "leading yourself" actually looks like when you're rebuilding (hint: it's not about how many posts you publish) The client relationships that shaped this season, including a personal brand project with Lindsay Leahy and closing out my role at The Restoration Project alongside Brooke Fitzgerald Why I applied for Leadership Iowa and what a few curiosity-driven coffee conversations have taught me about my own community How I used Human Design, Enneagram, astrology, and CliftonStrengths (with an assist from Claude) to build myself a personal operating system The "one new thing a day" challenge I started for my 39th year, and what it's taught me about staying creative Resources & Links Mentioned Leadership Iowa CliftonStrengths Assessment Human Design Jessie J Home's Yap Challenge Lindsay Leahy The Restoration Project Gravel Grading & Excavating Listen & Subscribe Spotify Apple Podcasts Share This Episode If you know someone in their own messy middle right now, send them this one. Sometimes the reminder that scattered still counts as progress is exactly what someone needs to hear today.

In this episode, Bev and Sandy discuss:​Sandy's backstory into coaching and the Enneagram​9 Enneagram types and how this may show up in a coaching call with a clientBev and Sandy share their Enneagram typesKey Take-aways:​Reflect on which Enneagram types you could relate to.​Connect with Sandy if you would like to learn more about your type(s) or do some continuing coach education around the Enneagram.ABOUT SANDY:Sandy Swanson, PCC, NBC-HWC, is a holistic leadership coach and mentor coach who believes that transformation begins with a deeper understanding of yourself. She works with leaders, coaches, therapists, and anyone tired of shrinking, second-guessing themselves, and disappearing into everyone else's needs.As a mentor coach, Sandy helps coaches strengthen their coaching skills, deepen their self-awareness, and learn to trust their own voice and presence in coaching conversations. Her work is informed by somatic and energetic awareness, the Enneagram, and healthy doses of compassion and humor.Sandy is also the host of "Beyond the Type", an Enneagram-inspired podcast about the “beautiful mess of being human”, where she explores communication, self-awareness, relationships, and personal growth.When she's not coaching, you might find her riding her Triumph Tiger 800XC motorcycle, rescuing migratory birds, or sitting in an opera pit orchestra somewhere on the Gulf Coast of Florida.CONNECT WITH SANDY:Learn more about Sandy's mentor coaching program, Patterns, Presence and the Enneagram - use code FOUNDING for a special discounted rate for August and October 2026 cohorts:⁠https://www.swansoncoaching.com/coaches-enneagram⁠Book a Typing Interview:⁠https://www.swansoncoaching.com/typinginterview⁠Sign up for Sandy's coaching newsletter here:⁠https://www.swansoncoaching.com/coaches⁠About Beverly:Beverly Sartain is the President of the Holistic Coach Training Institute, where she trains coaches on coaching skills and a holistic approach. The Holistic Coach Certification Programs are ICF Level 1 and Level 2 accredited that focuses on a holistic approach to coaching. We see clients as whole, complete and resourceful to create creative solutions to their challenges and dreams. During her ten-year career in nonprofits, she managed and developed domestic violence and co-occurring residential programs. Beverly is a Certified Addictions Professional. She has her PCC (Professional Certified Coach) from the ICF and loves developing human beings through coaching.Connect with HCTI:Sign-up for Holistic Coach Newsletter to get coaching skill and coaching business inspiration ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Sign-up for a Discovery Call ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ so you can join our Holistic Coach Certification Program or receive coaching.Check out our other offering on our website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://holisticcoachtraininginstitute.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Indra Rinsler — Vedic astrologer, Enneagram teacher since 1999, and author of the new book Indra's Net — joins Hugo to talk about 20 years raising kids in an ashram, why "it's through me, not by me," and the one spiritual practice he'd hand down after 50 years of study: love yourself.Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/sol-meets-heart--3691166/support.

Send us Fan MailWholehearted Enneagram: A Year Through the Types | Type 5 | Episode 1 of 4What does it look like to be the most prepared person in the room… and the most alone?Amy opens Type Five month with her co-teacher and spiritual director Deanna Sudom, exploring a type that is profoundly misunderstood — often seen as cold or aloof when they are actually among the most perceptive, generous, and deeply feeling people you will ever know.You'll hear about:The Five's core fear of being depleted, incapable, or incompetent — and how it shapes every relationship and decisionWhy Fives aren't emotionally unavailable… they're protecting something precious (and waking up every day feeling like they're already at 20%)The withdrawing stance and what it actually costs a Five and the people who love themHow Fives experience God intellectually before they trust Him — and what shifts when they move from knowing about God to being known by HimThe 18-inch gap between head and heart, and why filling it with more knowledge isn't the answerThe gift of the Five's wisdom, depth, and singular capacity for focused presence, and why the world genuinely needs what they've been holdingWhether you're a Five yourself or you love one, this conversation is an invitation: you don't have to earn your place at the table by knowing enough. You already belong.You have more to give than you know. And you don't have to disappear to be safe.Support the showRESOURCES FOR YOU:Join the Waitlist for 1:1 Coaching with Amy Wickshttps://www.simplywholehearted.com/callamywicksNot sure about your Enneagram Type? Start here: https://www.simplywholehearted.com/enneagramquizEnnea-what? The Beginners Guide to the Enneagram(free course + printables)https://bit.ly/Enneagram101GuideConnect with Amy:IGWebsite

Do you ever feel like you're doing everything you can as a leader, but still struggle to connect with the people around you? In this episode, I sit down with Tracy O'Malley to talk about the leadership skills that create stronger businesses, healthier relationships, and more connected teams. We dive into how understanding personality patterns helps you become a better leader, why self-awareness is the foundation of healthy teams, how better communication creates stronger company culture, and how AI can support your business without replacing what makes you uniquely human. Plus, Tracy breaks down how the Enneagram creates healthier teams and families. Get ready to become a more confident leader without losing what makes you uniquely you. Check out our Sponsors: Shopify - Try the ecommerce platform I trust for Glōci. Sign up for your $1/month trial period at http://Shopify.com/happy. Monarch Money -  Get your first year of Monarch Core for half off at http://Monarch.com with code EYH. Northwest Registered Agent - Visit northwestregisteredagent.com/EarnFree and start using free resources to build something amazing. Fabric - Join the thousands of parents who trust Fabric to help protect their family. Apply today in just minutes at meetfabric.com/earn. Indeed - Indeed is giving Earn Your Happy listeners a $75 SPONSORED JOB CREDIT to help get your job the premium status it deserves. Just go to http://Indeed.com/podcast right now and support our show by saying you heard about Indeed on Earn Your Happy. Momentous - If you want to try Momentous Signature Spec Creatine, head to livemomentous.com and use code EARN for up to 35% off your entire first order. Brevo - Meet Brevo…the all-in-one marketing and CRM platform built to help you connect with customers, boost engagement, and grow your business smarter. Get started for free today—or use code HAPPY50 to save 50% on Starter and Standard Plans for the first three months of an annual subscription. Just head to www.brevo.com/happy HIGHLIGHTS 00:00 Protect the one thing AI can never replace. 05:15 How the Enneagram can help you become a better leader. 11:00 What the Enneagram teaches you about leadership and communication. 15:45 The lesson that helped Tracy through one of the darkest seasons of her life. 22:30 The communication shift that builds stronger teams and healthier company cultures. 26:15 Why understanding people creates stronger teams.  31:00 How do you get people to buy into your vision? 35:45 How creating a shared language strengthens marriages, friendships, and leadership. 41:45 The fastest way to earn trust before offering advice. 44:15 What happens when your biggest motivators begin to change as you grow. 49:00 How to use AI without losing your authentic voice. 52:00 What should you never outsource in your business? 58:00 Are you hiding from the work you're meant to do? 01:04:30 The signs it's time to ask for help. RESOURCES Get $20 off Tracy's Enneagram Assessment with code EARNYOURHAPPY HERE! Apply for the Elite Entrepreneur Mastermind HERE! Get on the waitlist for Mentor Collective Mastermind HERE! Try glōci for 40% off your first order with code HAPPY at checkout - head to getgloci.com FOLLOW Follow me: @loriharder Follow glōci: @getgloci Follow Tracy: @tracy_omalley

So many of us have handed our spouse a job description they were never meant to fill, to notice our every need, validate our worth, provide our purpose, and keep us feeling seen, alive, and whole. And when they fall short, we feel unnoticed, disappointed, and we start to wonder if something is wrong with the marriage. In this opening series episode, Christa asks a different question: what if the problem is not your spouse, and not your marriage, but the weight of an impossible expectation? She explores the real ache of feeling unnoticed by the person closest to you, why one human being simply cannot be your entire world, and how your instinctual wiring, whether self-preservation, social, or sexual, shapes exactly what you long for your spouse to notice. Along the way she offers a warm challenge, do not be afraid to be the one who loves first, as well as practical, hopeful ways to tend your own aliveness, worth, and purpose so you can actually free your spouse to love you well. Because the less you need them to be everything, the more you get to enjoy who they truly are. Listen here! Watch on YouTube! Find more about your type, the pod, freebies, and SO much more at our website right here! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.EnneagramandMarriage.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Take the E + M Quiz at www.QuizforCouples.com ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ here!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Get Christa's Best-Selling Book, The Enneagram in Marriage, here! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://a.co/d/df8SxVx Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

When you combine an Enneagram type with a dominant instinct, you get a subtype — and there are 27 of them. This is the level at which most people finally, fully recognize themselves in the Enneagram. Not at the type level, not at the instinct level, but here — where the two come together into something precise enough to actually fit. In this episode, Anthony and I walk through what subtypes are, why they matter so much, and what some of the most striking examples look like in practice. We spend time on the counter-phobic Sexual Six, who presents so differently from the general Six description that mistyping as an Eight is extremely common. We look at the Self-Preservation Four — stoic, tough, nothing like the image most people carry of the Romantic type — and the Social Three, whose image management has become so sophisticated that they can appear humble and self-effacing while running every calculation in the room. We also talk through how to identify your own subtype, what Beatrice Chestnut's work has contributed to this area of teaching, and what to do with the discomfort that often arises when a subtype description lands a little too accurately. If you've ever felt like your type description is about right but something important is still missing — or if you've ever thought you might be two different types — this episode is the one that usually resolves it.   This episode builds on Episode 3 (Instincts). Listen to that one first if you haven't.     RESOURCES FROM THIS EPISODE: The Complete Enneagram: 27 Paths to Greater Self-Knowledge by Beatrice Chestnut  The Road Back to You by Ian Morgan Cron The Story of You by Ian Morgan Cron Enneagram Assessment | Find Your Type Ian's speaking and organizational work    Follow on Instagram | Facebook | TikTok | YouTube

Description:Some yeses cost us something. Some of them save us.Jen sits down with her partner, actor, author, and speaker Tyler Merritt, hours after his chemotherapy infusion. Tyler is midway through treatment for colorectal cancer, his second diagnosis in six years, and the two get honest about making thoughtful decisions when your body is calling every shot.They talk about the yes Tyler gave in the middle of radiation: booking a brand-new theater tour that opens seventeen days after his last chemo, a yes he says he "arguably shouldn't have" given, made so he'd have something beautiful to walk toward. Jen turns the lens on her own year and the yes she almost took back: getting on the plane to Me Camp after a hysterectomy, a brutal spring, and a boyfriend in chemo two thousand miles away.Tyler also flips the mic and asks Jen whether she regrets writing AWAKE. Her answer is about closure, discretion, and the two longest weeks of her life waiting to hear what her daughter thought of the book.Plus: how to tell your intuition from everybody else's fear, Jen's top three Me Camp TV experiences, one Enneagram argument, and the one yes Tyler is still too scared to say out loud.Thought-provoking Quotes:"There is something absolutely sacred in choosing your body in a time period where it may not be convenient." — Tyler"Rest is the thing that I choose. Rest is my sacred yes." — Tyler"It's not a yes that feels obligated. It's not coerced. It isn't even careless. It's thoughtful. It is baked in with wisdom." — Jen"In the midst of the fire, I made the decision to do something that would be difficult if I was just healthy." — Tyler"When someone else puts their caution on your yes, that can be a real governor on forward progress." — Jen"The sacred yes I'm afraid to say out loud is that I'm going to be okay." — TylerResources Mentioned in This Episode:AWAKE by Jen HatmakerI Take My Coffee Black by Tyler MerrittTyler's new theater tour, opening August 28Me Camp, the Enneagram, and Jeremy PopeJohn Candy: I Like Me, Widows Bay, The Bear, The Five-Star WeekendGuest's Links:Website - thetylermerrittproject.comInstagram - @thetylermerrittprojectTwitter - @TTMProjectFacebook - The Tyler Merritt ProjectYoutube - The Tyler Merritt ProjectConnect with Jen! Jen's Website - https://jenhatmaker.com/Jen's Instagram - https://instagram.com/jenhatmaker Jen's Twitter -

Here's something I've noticed after years of teaching the Enneagram: there's usually a moment when someone who knows their type well suddenly encounters something that doesn't fit. A behavior they can't explain. A pattern that seems to contradict everything their type is supposed to do. More often than not, the answer lives in the instincts. In this episode — Episode 3 of our Enneagram Essentials series — Anthony and I go into one of the most undertaught concepts in popular Enneagram culture: the three instinctual drives. Every human being is wired with three biological survival drives — Self-Preservation, Social, and Sexual (or One-to-One). These aren't psychological preferences. They're primal. They predate the ego. And they operate in a hierarchy — which means that depending on which instinct fires first for you, two people of the same Enneagram type can look almost nothing alike. We walk through all three instincts in detail: what each is oriented toward, what it looks like in everyday life, what its shadow side is, and how to start identifying which one is dominant for you. We also talk about the Repressed instinct — the drive that tends to be most underdeveloped — and why understanding it can explain a remarkable amount of friction in your closest relationships. If you've ever felt like your type description is about 80% accurate and you can't figure out what the other 20% is — take a deeper look at instincts.   **This episode is part of the Enneagram Essentials series. Episode 4 builds directly on today's content, so listen in order if you can.