Just Ask Your Mom

As a follow-up to our episode about middle school friendships with Jessica Speer, we had our own conversation about friendship: what it means, what it doesn't, what you can or should expect or not. Friendships are different from family. They're essential but--like everything that has to do with humans--they can be tricky!

Is there anyone who's on the other side of middle school who loved it and wishes they could go back? It's just hard, and one of the toughest aspects can be navigating friendships, especially with girls.  Jessica Speer, award-winning author of several interactive books about middle school, joins us for this important conversation!   #podmatchjessicaspeer.comBFF or NRF  Jessica's bookMiddle School: Safety Goggles Advised

“Half of families face substance abuse or mental health issues, yet 90% of them don't seek help.” That alarming stat is from the STEPS Ministries website.  In this episode, we're talking with founder, Steve Ward, about red flags parents should be aware of and steps you can take to help. Steve is candid about his own family's struggles with addiction, so he's got skin in the game.   

In our lively conversation with Simone & Olivia, we get into where confidence comes from, what influence inside and outside voices have on us (including those from an early abusive relationship), and how we can be brave enough to forge new roads.  Simone's an author, speaker, and mom of 6, one of those being her 22-yr-old daughter and podcast co-host, Olivia. simoneknego.comThe Extraordinary, Unordinary You (Simone's book)Her Unshakeable Confidence podcast 

Conflict in families is a matter of when, not if, but it's not necessarily something we should shy away from.  Done well, working through conflict can help you grow and can teach your children how it's done.  Who you fight with, what you fight about, and how often you fight matters less than HOW you do it.   

Our favorite pelvic floor PT is back as our guest, and in honor of C-section month, we're talking all about belly births.  Once again, Jenny taught us a lot!  If you're expecting (or know someone who is) or if you've delivered via cesarean, this episode could change your life!  https://archerphysicaltherapy.com/

Author and down-to-earth SAHM, Karen Johnson is our guest as we talk about healthy mothering.  What to do with all that perfectionism, anxiety and resentment that seems to come with the job.  Get her new book:  What Do I Want to Be When They Grow Up? And Other Thoughts from a 40-something Mom !!  Follow Karen @21stcenturysahm 

We talk with Titania Jordan, CMO of Bark Technologies, IRL Atlanta mom of a teenager, and author of a newly released book, Parental Control: A Guide to Raising Balanced Kids in the Digital Era.  Titania's appeared on many of your fav nat'l media outlets and is at the forefront of kids & internet safety.  Do you know what the #1 app your child shouldn't have is?  Which video games and apps have decent parental controls and which are a joke--and would you know how to know?  If you have a middle schooler, would it surprise you to know sexting is the new first base?  Be intentional and be informed, and don't miss this important conversation! titaniajordan.comChildhood 2.0

Guest Karen Johnson, a.k.a. @21stcenturysahm, talks with us about her new book for moms in the final stretch. In the trenches with 3 teenagers at home, she's thinking proactively about her soon-to-be-empty nest and talks to us about some things moms can be thinking about to prepare themselves for their kids' launch.  You can order her book & subscribe to her blog here:  https://www.the21stcenturysahm.com/Follow on IG @21stcenturysahm 

While we're out of pocket this week, we're re-releasing one of our most popular episodes.  Our guest, Matthew Houser, of Seeds Family Worship, shares some fantastic insights into the life of a teenager and what parents need to know.  

Does it matter how a society talks about children or people who choose to raise them? In this episode, we look at some recent opinions that highlight the divide between those with kids and those who are childfree. What might our words really be communicating (often unintentionally)?  

If it's been awhile since you purged your closet or if you'd describe your fashion style as "whatever" or "at least it's clean," join us for this conversation with our budget-savvy fashion friend, Emma Goodwyn. With an eye for what looks good, no matter your body type or age, she gives us some tips that anyone can use. @emma_goodwyn

Mercy makes our hearts tender, and as parents we sometimes need a reminder to extend mercy to our children instead of being punishment-driven, harsh, or quick to come down on them. This is not wishy-washy or permissive parenting. It's a way of showing God's character to our children and acting as first-responders to someone in need. 

Many of us love to travel but imagine we don't have the money to do it as much as we'd like. Our guests on this episode traveled to 30 countries for under $10k.  This is our conversation about their tips and tricks and how they did it!  Come join their adventure!  https://www.youtube.com/@benalaina @the_blaylocks @otagocoffeeco https://otagocoffeeco.com/

Learning about pelvic floor PT was a new frontier for us!  Join our conversation with guest, Jenny Archer, as she walks us through some surprising benefits, from pregnancy to post-partum, for children with bedwetting or constipation issues, and men and women in all stages of life. Who knew?!  https://archerphysicaltherapy.com/

It can be tough knowing whether to let your child quit an activity (sport, club, class) or require that they stick with it, teaching them perseverance and commitment. In this episode, we run down some questions to help parents get to the bottom of the issue and help talk your child through that decision.  

The average American starts investing at age 31.  In today's economy, what steps can parents take to give their kids a boost so they're not in debt up to their eyeballs in their early 20's?  Financial expert, David Sproles, walks us through some tips savvy parents (or grandparents!) can take to set their kids up for success.  

Special guest, Lauren Stamper (@diaperfreediaries), talks to us about exposing children to potty training at a very early age. This "diaper free" method (which is not strictly diaperless) can save you money and have your child out of diapers by their first birthday.  Lauren's a mom of two and it's worked with both of her kiddos. 

It can sometimes feel fruitless when you take your littles to church. If you have older children, sometimes you'll get push-back as they start to own their own faith. The lost shoes, walking the halls, and time in the cry room....Is all the Sunday morning frustration really worth it?  

Do dogs go to heaven? How do you field questions from your child about the loss of a pet?  Losing a pet can leave a child experiencing real grief, often for the first time in their life, and it can be tricky answering all the questions they come up with!  We suggest some ways to be both truthful and sensitive. 

We walk down memory lane with two of our favorite photographers as we trace how family photo sessions have changed.  Dawn Harrison & Rachael Shannon give us the scoop on what makes a great session and their favorite types of photos. There may just be a road trip to Texas for a Glamour Shot experience in our future. https://www.rachaelshannonphotography.com/

The science of caregiving--yes, there's research behind it!--is beginning to shed light on what it means to give and receive care (to children, parents, others), and how it changes us. Despite the prominent narrative in our culture that caregiving is a burden and detracts from higher aims, the evidence tells a different story.The Unexpected Magic of Caring for Othersby Elissa Straus

We're answering a listener's question about what to do when your parents (the grandparents) dismiss or disagree with how you're raising your children. Looking at both sides of the coin, we reveal some of what could lie behind this behavior and ways to help the situation.

We're answering a listener's question about what to do when your parents (the grandparents) dismiss or disagree with how you're raising your children. Looking at both sides of the coin, we reveal some of what could lie behind this behavior and ways to help the situation.

A familiar childhood complaint --that's not fair!--actually holds more nuance than we might think. What's the difference between fairness, justice, equality and equity? How do you handle it when your kid complains that something's not fair?

If Santa is a part of your Christmas traditions, there's a good chance your kids will visit him & Mrs. Claus at some point. Maybe that's for pictures or perhaps it's just to let Santa know their fondest wish. We've got some best practices and pro tips for visits to the jolly guy in red.

Is Santa just a magical given at your house, or does the whole Santa story give you pause? Are childhood "characters" lying to your children? Join us for a jolly conversation about St. Nick and some options for his place in the holidays.

Before the comprehensive book of baby names, how did parents choose names for their children? What's in a name anyway? What goes into choosing a name today? This episode might make you think twice before filling out that birth certificate!

All parents will face situations where our children need correction. The parenting interwebs offer a wide range of opinion on just how to do that. What IS discipline anyway and what does it look like? How does it differ from punishment, and what does it look like when we model our parenting after God's heart for us?

We move pretty fast in American society. There's so much to do and so much to take in. What's the real pace of childhood and can it teach us something as harried (and hurried) parents? How much down time should you (can you) actually have? The Hurried Child by David Elkind has its 25th anniversary this year.

Earlier this year, the term kinkeeping exploded. What is it and who tends to do it? We're talking about the emotional and organizational labor involved in keeping family connections strong, from being active in the group text to orchestrating the annual holiday family reunion. Is this a gendered role or one that anyone can do?

Sometimes it's helpful to step back from our day-to-day as parents and see what sort of role we're taking on with our kids. If we have a broader perspective, a view from 30,000 feet, say, we might learn a bit about our approach and whether it's serving us or our kids the way we want it to. Is your approach one of "ownership" or "ambassadorship"?

Halloween is a huge holiday with consumers, with billions spent each year. We're talking about our own Halloween experiences and where we've landed these days with trick-or-treating. Where does Halloween come from anyway? Does it matter if or how we celebrate it?

Jessica Patay, a mom of 3 from Los Angeles, CA, isn't fearless. But she is brave. She's formed a support organization and completed an anthology of stories from moms like her, moms whose expectations of motherhood turned out differently from what they'd imagined. One of her sons has Prater-Willi syndrome, a genetic disorder that they've learned to not only live with, but that has spawned an incredible outreach of support and community. wearebravetogether.org Brave Together podcast the Becoming Brave Together book

Older children need different guidance. There are some real transitions going on between parenting an elementary aged child and an adolescent/teen--for both parents and kids. They should be gaining responsibility and earning some freedom, while parents shift from directive guidance to a more influential role. We talk about many of those transitions and some of the issues that arise during these sometimes bumpy years.

The gig of motherhood. If we do it right and all goes according to plan, we end up with children who leave and make their own way in the world. It's the most all consuming thing for parents aannnddd then it isn't. On this episode, we're reflecting on what the empty nest felt like initially and how it's going.

Attorney and mom, Melissa Hogan, wrote the first book of its kind when her son was handed a challenging diagnosis. As she's navigated the health care system and learned how to care for her son and herself in the process, Melissa recognized the need to help all parents prevent and manage medical trauma. In our conversation she talks through some practical and surprising things parents can do with their children--even for routine pediatric doctor and dental visits--that can help allay fears and smooth the process. Afraid of the Doctor

One of the first major transitions a child has is the first day of school. We talk to two seasoned kindergarten teachers who give us great tips on what's really important for kids to know and practice before they start school, and some helpful advice for parents, too. Kindergarten is about way more than learning letters and numbers. How do you know when your child is ready?

Grocery prices have skyrocketed and the average family struggles to afford feeding their family every week. Mandy is a real-life, regular mom who has figured it out. She's got easy and delicious meal plans with shopping lists and normal ingredients for busy families--even if cooking isn't your thing. We tried some of her recipes and gave them two thumbs UP!! Plandy Mandy Meal Plans LISTENER DISCOUNT CODE: MOM30

Student debt can be a hot button subject! We wanted to see how it looked from a student's point of view. This episode is our conversation with a student recently out of grad school, with the student loans to prove it. Savannah Cunningham (Bonnie's daughter) taught us a thing or two and offers some on-the-ground tips for families with high school or college students navigating the minefields of student debt.

Many of us have looping tapes playing in our heads with a soundtrack that's largely negative. With a little practice and some small habits, we can arrest these toxic thoughts before they gain a foothold and hijack our relationships, success, and joy. And, we can teach our kiddos early on how to do this, too!

How we tell our stories determines how we see ourselves and the world. How do we frame a failure or diappointment? How do we recount a struggle? But it's not just all about the spin. In this episode, our conversation covers learning how to tell better, truer stories in order to find those glimmers of joy. Marcus Warner's book: The Four Habits of Joy-Filled People

In this third episode of our Joy series, we look at the difference between living from a fear-based perspective and one based on joy. We walk through some easy-to-practice skills you (and your kids!) can do to learn the power of appreciation and get back on the path to emotional regulation and calm. Marcus Warner's book: The Four Habits of Joy-Filled People

In this episode, part 2 of our joy series, we're talking about the first habit we can practice to move out of our "fear house" and into our "joy house." When we feel out of control -- like a toddler whose emotions are all over the place-- there are things we can do to quiet our bodies. Being calm isn't simply a matter of will or choice. When someone simply tells us to "calm down," it usually has the opposite effect! If your day seems to be spiraling, practice some of these calming exercises with your kids!

We hear the slogan "choose joy" tossed around a lot, but is that even possible? In this upcoming series we're unpacking a few habits that we can practice--and help our children practice to get a headstart on things!--to unearth more joy in our lives. Simple and quick habits anyone can do. Four Habits of Joy-Filled People: 15 Minute Brain Science Hacks to a More Connected and Satisfying Life

This 2-part interview with Traci Condra details her 15+ year marriage with her husband, Kyle, who struggled for years with worsening anger and rage. After years of prayer and counseling, Traci and their two daughters found themselves at a low point, wondering if this was just what life would be like. Then, the But God moment. National Domestic Abuse Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE. Why Does He Do That? by Lundy Bancroft

This 2-part interview with Traci Condra details her 15+ year marriage with her husband, Kyle, who struggled for years with worsening anger and rage. After years of prayer and counseling, Traci and their two daughters found themselves at a low point, wondering if this was just what life would be like. National Domestic Abuse Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE. Why Does He Do That? by Lundy Bancroft

In the 3rd in our birth order series, we peel back the curtain on the baby of the family. What makes lastborns tick and how might that play out in their marriages and parenting tendencies? Lastborns have advantages and disadvantages that other children in families don't. Plus, they really know how to turn on the charm.

There's more to middle children than being the overlooked, overshadowed kid who gets lost in the shuffle. Middles do find ways to distinguish themselves from other siblings. They're sociable, adaptable, and very loyal friends. As a middle child, how might you react as a parent, or a spouse? Knowing these tendencies about yourself or your chlid can be enlightening and helpful!

The family context we're born into plays a large part in who we become. It's the nurture part of the nature versus nurture equation. Firstborn and Only children not only have parents to themeselves for a good period of time, but they may also bear the first-time stress and doubt of new parents. They're the guinea pigs, the first drafts, and the ones who are oldest and should "know better." If you're a firstborn or only, sharing this episode with your younger siblings or spouse might explain a lot about you!

From hula hoops to Pelaton, this conversation with guest Hannah Skelley covers miles of fitness ground. She's a golf coach and mom of two who also designs her own fitness routines to work with a busy mom's schedule. Join us for the low down on fitness from pregnancy to post-partum and beyond! Check out the vothcenter.com (Voice of the Heart), the counseling center mentioned in this episode.