Oops All Monsters

CLUE, COBRA, and COCOON Keep watching this Bat Channel for our return to regularly formatted episodes after Gavin completes his move.     

In our ongoing Summer Reading Series Hess goes all solo professor style with an update on the CANDYMAN legacy to help you understand how Candyman relates to FREDDY KRUEGER, and perhaps also a 6 foot tall invisible bunny?  Pitter Patter  

The Boy Who Could Fly & Clan of the Cave Bear        

How many Mark Hammills can YOU eat?! RETURN OF THE JEDI's voluminous pit nightmare is perhaps the ultimate in STAR WARS monstrosities, as well as one of its most enduring toys.  But is it bitchin' van art?  We also crack the nut on what all the STAR WARS media is secretly about...and hint...knobs are involved.  +++PS FANS: sorry about my mouse noise on this one, I'm gonna have that fixed by next episode+++    

Big Trouble in Little China & The Black Cauldron

One of George A. Romero's lesser known monster films explores whether MARTIN, as portrayed by John Amplas, is actually a cursed bloodsucker from the days or yore, or just a deranged teen alienated by cultish superstition and mental derangement.  This bleak, savage, but oddly poignant portrayal of alienation in the rust belt modernity of 1970s Pennsylvania explores issues of sanity, doubt, religion, and the fracturing of society.  CONTENT WARNINGS FOR DISCUSSIONS OF MURDER SCENES THAT FEEL LIKE SEXUAL VIOLENCE *** Get all our stuff here: https://linktr.ee/oopsallmonsters  

Look to the skies with us this week as Gavin presents his take on Jordan Peele's UFO waking nightmare from 2022.  SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS EVERYWHERE! If you haven't already watched the film, we strong recommend you do so before enjoying this episode.  Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it's a giant flying sand-dollar that sucks up horses into its multi-use sphincter.  You spit into the wind, you don't tug on Superman's cape, you don't pull the mask off the old Lone Ranger and YOU DO NOT LOOK DIRECTLY AT THE CHIMP.  *** Get all our stuff here: https://linktr.ee/oopsallmonsters  

Strap in your stepping geese and polish your Schmeisser submachine guns cuz it's pissed off nazi time!  You thought the zombies in YOUR life were pissed, wait til you meet these undead European meanies.  They're coming out of the ocean, they're coming out of the snow, and you better not have any of their gold or you're going to get what's coming to you.  Gavin and Hess explore the through-lines that unite these and other iterations of the nazi zombie phenomenon and place that firmly inside the larger category of "European zombies", which, we learn, are utterly distinct from those originating here in the USA. Also, check out the film RAMPANT, about Korean zombies taking over a medieval city.  CONTENT WARNINGS:  NAZIS NAZIS NAZIS The use of the term "Scandahoovian"  Failure to remember the name of the College Humor show UM ACTUALLY, despite it being one of Hess' favorites.  *** Get all our stuff here: https://linktr.ee/oopsallmonsters

PixelLit Podcast -  https://pixellitpod.com Phil and Hess conclude their dive into all things THING by looking at what the authors of each version included (dogs) and sometimes excluded (mind-reading-Thing), as well as personal anecdotes, and a lot of love for the 2002 THE THING videogame.   

Hess brings on friend of the show PHIL from PIXEL LIT to discuss all things THE THING! In this first installment of a two-part ride, Hess and Phil discuss the original 1938 Novella WHO GOES THERE? that inspired director Howard Hawks as well as John Carpenter in the creation of their vastly influential horror films.  This episode runs through the literary "other" in film, the Red Scare in the early 20th century, and how terrifying Rob Bottin's FX were when shown on the big 35mm screen.  CONTENT WARNINGS:  literary theory pontificating pink commie leanings *** Get all our stuff here: https://linktr.ee/oopsallmonsters  

Hess and Gavin are getting into professional Game Mastering! *** I'm giving listeners of this show a special opportunity to play Hess's first hosted sessions of DUNGEON WORLD: ESCAPE! Currently there is scheduled an 18+ version at 630 on Thursday March 16 - 5 slots open And a TEEN version at 2pm on Sat March 11, also up to five players. Times are Eastern Standard Time USA (EST) And if you're not familiar with Dungeon World it's a rules light, character focused fantasy take on games like Dungeons and Dragons, and in ESCAPE...  *** The Heroes play a band of nefarious convicts, being unjustly (or perhaps justly in your case?) shipped into servitude over sea to a notorious prison colony. Playing as races typically associated with villainy (hobgoblins, bugbears, etc), they will have to fight for their lives and their FREEDOM!!! If you have questions or want to organize a more custom game, or at a different time, shoot me an email at oopsallmonsters@gmail.com  

In the revolutionary dystopian RPG originally published in 1988 by Mike Pondsmith and R Talsorian Games, CYBERPUNK (various, from TTRPG to anime to FPShooter) explores the edges of humanity, capitalism, and personal frailty amongst a neon backdrop of acid rain, body-altering cyberware, and techno-wizardry.  No characters personify the monstrous alienation of this world more deliciously than MAELSTROM, a gang of cyber-maniacs that take de-humanization and self mutilation not as eventual goal, but stepping-stone for entry into their bloody, maniacal cabal.  Whether it's selling morbid "better-than-life" hallucination chips or dealing in zero-nutrition insect "food stuffs" through their ALL FOODS front, MAELSTROM is a bleeding chrome tooth in the manicured aesthetic of NIGHT CITY'S cosmopolitan facade.  CONTENT WARNINGS:  steampunk anime capitalism *** Get all our stuff here: https://linktr.ee/oopsallmonsters  

Unbuckle your pants and load your bazookas, cuz it's blobbin' time! In 1988, exactly 30 years after the original film, Kevin Dillon and Shawnee Smith starred in a gruesome horror comedy full of over-the-top gore effects and middle-fingers to the man.  Whether you are currently, or on your way to being, a blobficianado, join us on our journey to answer the immortal question...can we blame the Russians for this one?  CONTENT WARNINGS:  briefly mentioned cinematic over-the-clothing sexual assault fake mullets verbal abuse of the american food pyramid *** Get all our stuff here: https://linktr.ee/oopsallmonsters Check Heidi Lange out @ChimeraCostumes and Sandman Books https://www.sandmanbooks.com/

Wax your lips and sharpen your lapels, because Gavin and Hess don't pull punches in the conclusion of their agonizingly deep take on the mid-90s roleplaying sensation, VAMPIRE THE MASQUERADE.  CONTENT WARNINGS:  adolescence/teenagers are discussed The Columbine School shooting Chris Kattan *** Get all our stuff here: https://linktr.ee/oopsallmonsters Check Heidi Lange out @ChimeraCostumes and Sandman Books https://www.sandmanbooks.com/

Lace up your leather jacket and polish your wine bottles full of precious bodily fluids, it's time to suck the life out of adolescence!  NOT adolescents...adolescence!  Leave the teens alone.  Or help them? They need help, perhaps in the form of a wildly involved, super-system of roleplaying games built on a foundation of punk rock, goth music, shoe-gazing mental illness and reductive ethnic stereotyping that DEFINITELY ISN'T CARRIED INTO THE 21st century by its parent company.  BAT!!! CONTENT WARNINGS: the existence of teenagers Andrew Lloyd Webber  Antonio Banderas...or should I say...Antonio Ban-BARE-ASS!?  yeah? no? yeah! The total vivisection of your soul over the course of nine centuries...but in a sexy fun way this time.  ********* Get all our stuff here: https://linktr.ee/oopsallmonsters    

NOT AN EPISODE FOR CHILDREN!!! 2022 brought us a nightmarish new vision of demonic bliss in the restart of the HELLRAISER series, so HAPPY FU*%ING NEW YEAR!   Seriously though, this one is a major point of enthusiasm for both of us, and we slammed out an old-school, double-thicc episode for y'all.  CONTENT WARNINGS: Genital Mutilation Bill Burr as Pinhead The total vivisection of your soul over the course of nine centuries ********* Get all our stuff here: https://linktr.ee/oopsallmonsters Check Heidi Lange out @ChimeraCostumes and Sandman Books https://www.sandmanbooks.com/

A nutsack kaiju emerges from the Hudson Bay to destroy millennials and they didn't give it an award, they just gave JJ Abrams a Ballz-load of money.  CONTENT WARNINGS:   Actual Filmic Debate Forgetting of Lizzy Kaplan The acknowledgement of TJ Miller as a living human man The pretentious definition of cinema language in the negative abstract ********* Get all our stuff here: https://linktr.ee/oopsallmonsters Check Heidi Lange out @ChimeraCostumes and Sandman Books https://www.sandmanbooks.com/

Show Creator Greg Mcracken, when forced to change his devilish villain from a traditional tailed and horned goat man by the censors at CARTOON NETWORK, turned to camera and growled under his breath..."Not a problem...suck on THIS instead," and delivered this week's infernal topic...His Infernal Majesty, aka HIM. CONTENT WARNING  FOR: ONE TRULY UPSETTING DEMON SERIOUSLY, IT'S LIKE PENNYWISE FOR KIDS BUT WORSE ********* Get all our stuff here: https://linktr.ee/oopsallmonsters Check Heidi Lange out @ChimeraCostumes and Sandman Books https://www.sandmanbooks.com/

There's a vicious space cockroach inside of Vincent D'Onofrio, and it needs you to give it sugar.  This wacky space-crime-on-earth action comedy about a secret intergalactic government agency that steals your thoughts in order to keep you ignorant about the magnitude of life's real dangers is HILARIOUS.  RIP Kevin Conroy https://www.cbr.com/kevin-conroy-dc-pride-batman/

Hess examines the impact of Jack Arnold's cinematic sci-fi masterpiece, connecting the Creature (aka Gill-Man) to Michael Myers, and understanding the film (originally conceived as an adaptation of Beauty & The Beast through the very heavy presence of the male gaze.  Also: Extensive Guillermo Del Toro Jeff Goldblum covering COMMON PEOPLE  by Pulp One mandatory Star Wars Rant and only one trashing of JJ Abrams

In the mid-1960s, kids could climb right up in front of their black and white TVs and watch not one but TWO families filled with wacky monsters caper around their dusty old Victorian mansions, to the delight of every Dad that ever made a pun.  In 2022, Rob Zombie attempts to recreate THE MUNSTERS, a whimsical but beloved sitcom centered around a goofy, disoriented, but well-intentioned Frankenstein's Monster known as HERMAN MUNSTER.  We discuss the character of Herman, the style of the Rob Zombie film, and the significance of the Herman Munster character in his family, and in the larger culture.  Also, we talk about Sam Neill a lot.  ++++++++++++++++++++ Get all our stuff here: https://linktr.ee/oopsallmonsters Check Heidi Lange out @ChimeraCostumes and Sandman Books https://www.sandmanbooks.com/

BAH-NANANANA NANA NANA - CLAYFACE!! Hess delivers a delirious take on Gotham's gooshiest mudman, the thirsty thespian, the post-human theatre-troupe himself, CLAY-FACE! Dating back to the early days of Detective Comics, various iterations of this chimerical curmudgeon have cursed the streets of Gotham, and bedeviled the dynamic duo.  A stand out DC villain, Clayface is equal parts shapeshifter and sympathetic victim of his own vanity.  Content Warnings:  Nine Inch Nails Corner Ron Perlman David Fincher's SEVEN Harley Quinn & Batman ********* Get all our stuff here: https://linktr.ee/oopsallmonsters Check Heidi Lange out @ChimeraCostumes and Sandman Books https://www.sandmanbooks.com/  

Gavin presents this low-budget, Proto-ALIENS, zombie-fying, space-thing in an episode that ends up being less about the movie, and more about why actors are forced to work with Klaus Kinski, and why toy companies are so bad at making Xenomorphs.    ********* Get all our stuff here: https://linktr.ee/oopsallmonsters Check Heidi Lange out @ChimeraCostumes and Sandman Books https://www.sandmanbooks.com/

YEAR TWO BEGINS! What do you get when you mix Director Ridley Scott, some very attractive people, nasty goblins, unicorns, and a band of elves and faeries?  An Epic Trapper-Keeper Fantasy adventure so hot it burned down the studio they shot it in.   Also, Robert Picardo's performance as our feature monster SWAMP WITCH/HAG "Meg Mucklebones" is truly nightmarish.  Be good for goodness sake!   ********* Get all our stuff here: https://linktr.ee/oopsallmonsters Check Heidi Lange out @ChimeraCostumes and Sandman Books https://www.sandmanbooks.com/

On this special pre-SANDMAN show release episode, I am joined by fun and informative guest HEIDI LANGE of Sandmanbooks.com (link below) to wrap our collective heads around psychopomps! Pyschopomps are an oddly specific yet universal category:  Neutral Ferryworkers that guarantee your safe passage from your mortal life to the great beyond. Cultures across the globe and spanning millennia have their own agents of travel from Gaul to Greece, the Etruscans to Egypt, and from the Valkyries to the modern day Grim Reaper.  We cover the broad category of psychopomps through some obscure examples, as well as hit on what makes the heart of the character of DEATH, as depicted in Neil Gaiman's Sandman series, and the books and graphic novels that spawned the character and their mythology.  Get all our stuff here: https://linktr.ee/oopsallmonsters Check Heidi Lange out @ChimeraCostumes and Sandman Books https://www.sandmanbooks.com/       Mythology Celtic Etruscan Norse Psychopomps EgyptianMythology NeilGaiman DCComics ImageComics DarkHorseComics #Sandman #auroraborealis #theuberdriversoftheafterlife #KristinChenoweth #Easter #Wednesday #AmericanGods #booksellers # Banshee #Styx #comics #graphicnovels #goth  

Sorry for the radio silence friends! We are coming back at you very shortly.  Like a cyborg from the future or Pennsylvania toll payments, we're a bitch to get rid of!

Friend of the show Claire comes on to wrangle these two white Dungeon Masters around the topic of the bizarre, vampiric, torso-dividing, bat-winged, organ-sucking monstrosity, the Killa from Manilla, the lady that puts the Ass in Aswang, the Manananggal.   

In 1988 colossal nerdlingers Ron Howard and George Lucas smashed their massive domes into each other like two rutting ram studs, until spilled forth one of the 80s most successful high fantasy epics.  Gavin details the Brownies, portrayed by Kevin Pollack and Rick Overton to extreme comic effect, as well as the two-headed Eborsisk, a fire-breathing faux-hydra of nightmarish aspect. He also details how the Eborsisk and other Willow miniatures damaged his young psyche AND testicles in a traumatic schoolyard tragedy-slash-layway-mishap.  Let's see Joe Rogan try to do THAT! #ValKilmer #Willow #Fairies #LittlePeople #Fantasy #Willow #DanaDelaney #MichaelBiehn #WarwickDavis

Oil your harmonica and $hit-kick your boots, the Graboids are coming to Perfection, Nevada!  This classic 1980's script literally dirty-talked its way into the 90s, and made Kevin Bacon reel with horror at what he saw as the nadir of his acting career, only to turn out one of the most efficiently written and enduring examples of American Comedy-Horror ever put to screen. Get your pants off, and pole vaunt to the next residual boulder, these godd@mn recrooms aren't going to break into themselves!  RIP Fred Ward #GaryNumanKenkuArtificer #andlegsthatgoALLthewayup

After they came to get you, Barbara, they stalked Ken Foree and his giant head around the Monroeville mall, then they dragged Rhodes' guts out of his miserable rotten body in the underground bunker, and now they have the nerve to get clever and chase after the one and only Dennis Hopper you've hidden in the highest possible tower in Steeltown, The City on Three Rivers, the place with kind of a lot of bridges, the home of french-fries-on-your-salad, Pittsburgh-Pennsyl-f*#king-vania. 

In 2018 Innersloth games unleashed an innocuous-looking cooperative Hidden Role game that took the combative elements of the party games Werewolf & Mafia and wrapped them up in cute little spacemen being infiltrated by mysterious alien "Impostors".  Thanks to a hurricane combination of good design, cross-platform social play on mobile, kids being trapped at home, and an essential understanding of classic horror film paranoia, AMONG US exploded in international popularity, leading a revolution of "sus" language overtaking the elementary and middle schools of America and beyond.  Swipe your ident card, divert the power, and get ready to vote SOMEBODY out of the airlock.  CONTENT WARNINGS:  Spoilers for John Carpenter's THE THING Frequent references to children, and their you know...behavior Jennifer Connelly #GaryNumanKenkuArtificer  

Undead? Check.  Extremely Violent and Dangerous? Check.  Rides a flaming nightmare horse? Check.  Carries their soul in a flaming green enchanted sword? check.   This bitchin' van practically paints itself.   CONTENT WARNINGS:  #GaryNumanKenkuArtificer #Metal mentions of phylacteries and their uses mentions of the existence of right wing politics  

This Chocolate bar is KRONCHY, folks!  Hess & Gavin delve into the dank depths of fiction forward role-playing game DUNGEON WORLD and investigate some of the essential aspects of monster-gaming.  If you're SUPER not into the dork-fests and game discussions, this may not be the episode for you, as we go light on the monsters, heavy on the Nat20s.   But you're all Nat 20s to us, Dear Readers.  CONTENT WARNINGS:  Battletech Initiative Systems Shadowrun ElonMusk #goblinmode  PoweredByTheApocalypse

Meatloaf Aday defined the iconic role of the reconstructed American rocker Frankenstein in Richard O'Brien's subversive masterpiece The Rocky Horror Picture Show.  We take a look at Meatloaf, at Eddie himself, the world into which he is brought, and why Frankenstein media is so flow-pirate-shirt-friendly.    Content Warnings:  Penny Dreadful  Stabbing Westward Cyrano De Timmy Cappello I Would Do Anything For Love Adam Lambert #TheTimeWarp  

In 1910 at his third movie studio, Edison's Bronx cinema team created the first monster movie.  The film was lost for most of the 20th century until a copy was shockingly unearthed in the late 70s and restored.  We discuss the film, its situation within Frankenstein and film media, and sad bastard gothic artificial men and their lovely makeup jobs.   

Gavin drags in the paramount abortion of The Asylum, a film company known primarily for trolling inattentive stoners with their knock-offs of real movies.  But DO watch Black Summer.  Also, there's some Tucker & Dale vs Evil in there to cleanse your filthy filthy palette.   

The thrilling conclusion to the Scholastic book based on the hit Nintendo game that teaches us,  If you're a thirteen year old ninja you CAN save ancient relics from a demon that lives in the amazon jungle as long as you have the powers of pyrokinesis and chronomancy.  Maybe our politicians could learn a thing or two from this book. Check out Kevin and Phil's show over at:  https://www.pixellitpod.com/  

I'M THE LEPRECHAAAUUUUN!!!

Hey There Dear Readers, I had an incredible time recently guesting on the hilarious show PIXEL LIT my friends Kevin and Phil do where they read and discuss the novelizations of famous video game properties.   We read the novelization of NES classic NINJA GAIDEN published by Scholastic books, and man was it a doozy.  With no reservation I would say this is a hilarious conversation.  Also, since this is BONUS, expect another regular OOPS episode coming at you hot ON St Patrick's Day as we celebrate it here in the US.  If you enjoyed this ep, please check PIXEL LIT out here, they are an hilarious couple of guys:  https://www.pixellitpod.com/

Vigo haunted this episode.  Check for yourself at minute 54. Vigo the Carpathian Vigo the Cruel Vigo the Torturer Vigo the Despised Vigo the Unholy Vigo the Butch Scourge of Carpathia Sorrow of Moldovia Prince Vigo  OH COMMAND ME LORD! Content Warnings:  References to Dom Deluise.  Minor Key John Denver.  Sorcery.  Everything you are doing is bad.  I just want you to know this. 

What happens when you take Marty McFly, Gomez Adams, Cujo's Mom, and the FX house that would later bring you Lord of the Rings and shake liberally?  TOO MANY CONFUSING SIGHT GAGS!  Or EXACTLY the right amount of digital sight gags, if Gavin is to be listened to.  CONTENT WARNINGS:  Jake Busey Post-Mortem Sterotypes Pharoah-f*cking

Check out Kevin and Phil's awesome show where they read and review the novelizations of video games:  https://www.pixellitpod.com/ And everything Oops All Monsters related:  https://linktr.ee/oopsallmonsters The thrilling conclusion to our head to head bracket!! The conclusion to the ultimate monster battle 24 weeks in the making, we resolve who will rain supreme in season one between:  The Stuff from The Stuff! Mermaids from...fiction! Trap-Jaw from Master of the Universe! The Deathclaw from Fallout! Place your bets and strap in.   QUALITY WARNING: This episode was recorded during a brief quality issue we had for a couple early episode and some of the tracks are just really junky.  If this is your first time coming to our show, please choose a different episode to start with, also this one will make zero sense.   Please revisit episode 011 to refresh yourself on the prior brackets!   

Winston Smith. Princess Buttercup and Wesley. Vincent Price.  What do they all have in common? Torment at the razor-sharp fangs of the true citizens of London and New York City, the entrails digging varmint that could, the very real red-eyed menace, THE RAT! film, gaming, literature have all turned their anxious eyes to the dark shadows shifting in the corner of the room to access a fear based in something real and very, very hungry.  We jump to a potpourri of topics related to rats both giant and medium edition to get a sense of WHY they just keeping popping up everywhere.  CONTENT WARNINGS:  Sega CD Brad Dourif vs Stephen King Fred Savage TORTURE BOTH FICTIONAL AND HISTORICAL BY NONCONSENSUAL RAT

Steal a face from the television and extend your phallic assault cannons, it's time to blast our way through the delightfully voracious fuzzbeasts of the VHS era, they're not gremlins, they're not communists, THEY'RE CRITTERS!!! CONTAINS:  Excessive John Cena, Easter Sunday Sheriff Murder, Gratuitous Lack of Irony   note:  This episode had a brief audio issue - FIXED!    

Rip your jeans into cutoffs and plug your private parts into the wall socket, because it's time to bite our way out of Brazil, Dear Readers! STREET FIGHTER'S og monstrosity, the chlorophyll-colored Capoeira conundrum, somehow also just a guy-named-Jimmy, he's mean, he's green, he's BLANKA!!!!!! (insert shout-barking noise & electrical discharge effect) CONTENT WARNINGS: actual references to CAPCOM's racist concept art Jean Claude Van Damme https://linktr.ee/oopsallmonsters

This episode is tiny, just like The Knight!  HOLLOW KNIGHT - One of 2017's top rated games of any genre, is an immersive, mind-bending dive into a cute-yet-terrifying underground world of bugs, grubs, spirits and supernatural warfare waged with broken nails.  We discuss the world of Hollow Knight, our own observations about its style and gameplay, and perhaps its most iconic Boss Monster - NOSK! Music Producer Alex Moukala reacts to the Soundtrack Oops All Monsters Stuff I'm So Sorry...Neckst Up by Daddy Long Neck and Wide Neck

CONTENT WARNING: Dungeons Dragons Aubrey Plaza Gary Gygax

Fire up your Dick Millers, and lubricate your space slugs, it's time for the thrilling conclusion to 2022's kickstart - NIGHT OF THE CREEPS.  Also:  Aubrey Plaza is a hot lady goblin.  Fred Dekker, Tom Atkins, Zombie Space Slugs, Horror, Comedy, Badassery "It's Miller Time!"    https://linktr.ee/oopsallmonsters

Load your 12 gauges and Aquanet your hair, because these drunk slugs are here to fuck.  We explore what MIGHT be Hess's FAVORITE horror flick.  Perhaps the ultimate smart-movie-disguised-as-a-dumb-movie, it's got zombies, it's got exploding heads filled with slugs, it's got Tom-fucking-Atkins, it's got fascists tripping cripples, it's got a suicidal Detective who says "THRILL ME" way more than is reasonable.  Joe Bobs says check it out! https://linktr.ee/oopsallmonsters

Bill Murray kicks your emotional teeth in in 1988's carousel of Christmas-time cheer, chain-clinking ghosts, and class-warfare, it's SCROOGED.  Visited by four ghosts, each more disorienting than the next, Murray portrays misunderstood job creator Frank Cross, who attempts to inject some work ethic into the cowardly social justice warriors all around him, until he is brainwashed by a punk rock demon, a jewish faerie, and corporate media itself into believing that helping others has validity, and is not an egregious front to everything Ayn Rand stood for. https://linktr.ee/oopsallmonsters

What happens when you take a Reagan-era drug cult messiah, acorporate-dystopian Detroit on the brink of private-sector takeover, and automatic policing?  2021!  JK - You get Robocop 2, and with it, the Robocop universe's most menacing of charismatic cultists, refitted as a chrome-plated killing machine; none other than ROBOCAIN.  Grab your Sunblock 5000 and your cassette full of Nuke injectors, it's time to strap in and fast forward to 2028.  I'd buy that for a dollar! https://linktr.ee/oopsallmonsters