The Motyv Podcast

This episode of the Motive podcast features Shayden Bertagnolli discussing a therapy session he had with a client named Joe who opened up about his struggles with mental health. Shayden shares Joe's lengthy list of negative and self-defeating thoughts to illustrate how writing them down and vocalizing them can be incredibly liberating. The hosts discuss common issues men face in seeking help, the impact of repetitive thoughts in shaping beliefs, and how finding compassion through shared vulnerability is empowering. Overall it promotes the message that facing inner demons and mental health challenges is made easier by embracing truth and connecting with others who understand.

This podcast discusses how understanding opposites can help overcome problems like anxiety, shame, and a lack of belonging. The hosts explore how the true opposite of anxiety is trust in God, and how vulnerability can help men overcome shame instead of constantly seeking approval. They discuss the importance of vertical principles like belonging to God rather than horizontal fitting in. The hosts encourage developing self-awareness, self-compassion, and intentionally designing routines that promote well-being and meaning over temporary relief or pleasure-seeking.

Shayden interviews his friend Eric Thompson about his experience living with ALS. Eric discusses how his diagnosis has changed his perspective, making him more compassionate towards himself and others. He shares his struggles with loss of independence and maintaining hope in the face of ongoing suffering. Eric emphasizes the importance of living in the present moment and finding gratitude for what he can still do. The discussion explores themes of masculinity, serving others, and the balance between strength and gentleness.

In this episode, the speakers discuss their daily routines and the importance of small disciplines in building structure and focus over time. They explore the relationship between busyness, worry, and avoidance, emphasizing the need for self-care, rejuvenation, and downtime. The speakers share personal strategies for prioritizing family, work, and rest while maintaining boundaries. They encourage listeners to reflect on what truly matters and find solutions rather than dwelling on problems.

Shayden and Blake sit down and talk about the new direction of the Motyv Men program.

 In this episode, Shayden Bertagnolli sits down with his friend Erik Thompson to have an open and honest conversation about Erik's experience living with ALS. Erik shares powerful insights he has gained about finding meaning through hardship by focusing on gratitude, acceptance and living in the present moment. He discusses the lessons he has learned about relationships, toughness and embracing life's challenges. This raw and emotional discussion provides perspective on making the most of each day and finding happiness even in the face of adversity.

In this episode, licensed therapist Shayden Bertagnolli delves deeply into the nuances of shame and how it can hold men captive. He discusses shame as an emotion, a state of being, and a thought process ("shaming") used to falsely atone. Shayden offers insight on how shame becomes a lens through which many men view themselves and the world. He challenges listeners to become aware of shame and shaming in order to break free from its grip. Shayden also announces an intensive year-long program to help men transform their lives by addressing the roots of shame and learning to lead authentically.

In this episode, hosts Shayden Bertagnolli and Blake discuss how resentment and blame can hold people captive in unfulfilling relationship patterns. They guide listeners through an exercise of identifying the benefits of resentment and the disadvantages of accountability and empathy. Their goal is to help listeners gain insight into their own resentments so they can be liberated from those unhelpful patterns.

In this episode, Shayden shares lessons from a men's group discussion about trusting God's timing for healing past wounds. He encourages listeners to slow down and experience God's love and presence now rather than waiting for full healing. Shayden challenges people to thank God for miracles not yet received and to consider what differences their lives would show if miracles occurred.

Shayden Bertagnolli hosts a discussion on betrayal trauma with Sadie and Phyllis. They discuss the impact of betrayal such as infidelity or pornography use on relationships from the perspective of women. Key topics include common feelings and messages women internalize after betrayal, the difference between simple and complex trauma, rebuilding trust over time, and finding hope through focusing on personal healing and choosing to make the relationship work if both partners are willing.

Shayden leads a discussion about gratitude with Sadie, Steve, and Jordan. They discuss how gratitude is not merely appreciation, but something that possesses you. Questions such as “how do you know if you have enough gratitude?” and “how to facilitate deeper gratitude?” are focused on. It's a quick and to the point, so you can get on with your holiday preparations! 

How things are said and defined really matters. You need to know the differences between, attraction and lust, depression and sadness, and niceness and kindness. They matter and most people don't know the difference. Listen as Shayden, Jordan, and Blake discuss these important dichotomies.

Shayden and Blake talk about how sometimes we forget to thank God for ourselves. They also talk about the Power of Christ to heal mental health struggles, and the importance of having something positive to put our focus on.

Playfulness is more than just laughing and having a good time. Most men lose their natural playfulness for various reasons. The playful consequences in relationships, parenting, and individual life are discussed. Shayden, Blake, and Steve discuss these reasons and propose why men and the women in their lives need and want to see more playfulness. 

Shayden, Blake, Steve, and Sadie reflect on their own experiences as parents and therapists, shedding light on how a balance between support and autonomy is crucial for a child's growth. They discuss the impact of over-rescuing and enabling kids, as well as the importance of allowing them to tackle challenges on their own.

From milking it shamelessly to searching for that precious moment of vulnerability, Shaydon and Sadie delve into the deeper emotional and psychological aspects at play. Discover the delicate balance between needing a break, feeling shame, and the desire for mercy. They offer insights into how the "Man Cold" can be an opportunity for men to let go of their constant performance pressure and for women to understand the importance of allowing space for vulnerability.

In this podcast, you'll delve into the concept of burnout, which affects many of us at different points in our lives. The hosts offer a refreshing take on the distinction between burnout and exhaustion, shedding light on the vital role of recognizing our values and living a life that aligns with them. By sharing their own experiences and insights, they guide you through the process of reorienting yourself and finding that elusive sense of fulfillment.

The hosts offer practical advice on how to work through the internal struggle of maintaining a balance between our light and dark selves. They emphasize the importance of self-awareness, focusing on becoming the person you want to be, and offering the benefit of the doubt to others.

In this episode, Shayden and Blake discuss the importance of understanding behavioral patterns and core beliefs in overcoming struggles like pornography. They explain how to map out a pattern and identify the core beliefs that drive problematic behaviors. They emphasize the role of connection and compassion in breaking unhelpful patterns and beliefs.

Is your mind running you or are you running your mind? Did you know you aren't your mind? The knowledge in this episode will blow your mind! Pun intended. The challenge and announcement at the end is a must hear.

Shayden and Blake talk about staying tough while still being able to express your emotions, compastion vs acceptance, and learning how to deal with emotions like sadness and boredom.

Men are motivated by many things. Knowing what really drives you is crucial to living purposefully. Think about the hardest thing you've ever done. Why did you do it? We break down how and why a Crossfit athlete finished on a broken foot and what it means for men. 

Men are starving for answers as to why they feel stuck, can't kick bad habits, and feel attacked. Addiction has never pulled more strongly at men. Relationships are struggling and men don't know what to do. Motyv men will help you find solutions to those issues. Like most men know, a problem isn't as bad if you have the right tools. Motyv men will liberate you by teaching and giving you tools to solve whatever it is you're going through. Listen to this episode to hear what our program is all about. You can sign up or hear more details by emailing our assistant at assistant@motyv.com, or text/call at 435.315.2520. 

God has a way of directing our lives in ways we can never predict. My life's journey has brought me to a point of focus that is undeniably important to me. My time to Liberate Men is now here. I share two powerful laws that dictate a meaningful life and how you can be involved in the Motyv movement!

This episode features an assessment you need to take about any significant relationship in your life. It will show you how primed your relationship is for connection. Listen in as I dispel a common myth most people believe in their relationships. 

I don't know anyone who doesn't want more confidence. The power to stand within your own skin and stay there. I open up and share a chapter out of my own life and discuss how you can increase confidence every day and even every moment. 

Discipline is becoming more rare each day. Our society of dopamine seeking, lust fantasies, and much more are tempting a life focused on motivation more than ever. This is a problem! Change your relationship with the entire concept of discipline as you listen to our take on this incredible dichotomy. 

Learn more about faith, perseverance, and commitment from a Motyv Man and Motyv Therapist...Steve Stringham, as he discusses with Shayden how a Grand Canyon hike impacted his life for the better.  Painful things can bring out the best in us if we let them. Do you let them? Or do you resist the pain and lose the lesson? 

In this world of extreme opportunity and options, your ability to focus and stay in the lane best for you can be daunting. Discipline is an answer. You and anyone around you has need to increase self-trust through discipline. To be and do what you say you're going to do. Listen in and see what inspiration comes to you for your life! 

How you spend your time is where your heart will be. Our time isn't something we get back. Once used, it's done. Our life is a collection of time. This episode will help you think about three truths you should have in your heart governing what you do, how you prioritize, and where you're going. You know...just big stuff like that! 

This episode was emotional and exciting. The courage it takes for someone to share their story is immense. Let yourself hear and feel this person's story. Let it change you. Let it show you how you can see people from a new and more charitable perspective. 

Beliefs are like eye glasses. They influence how we see the world. What you believe in the details of your soul are often hidden and blind. Listen to this episode to assess and look into yourself about what you believe. "We busy ourselves for lifetimes in the process of change...but do you really believe you CAN change?"

You don't have to be a parent to gain some wisdom here. We often talk about kids respecting their parents, what about the other way around. This episode includes an introduction to the newest Motyv therapist, Blake Altom, and his take on an amazing way parents can respect their children. The conversation goes east and west with other gems you shouldn't miss out on. 

Life happens and lately it's happening "hard." People, circumstances, situations, and politics have a way of igniting our internal world of emotions. Instead of hoping all these external things will change, how about focusing on what you can do. Here are four steps on how to do so. 

What's the saying about excuses and butts...we all them and they all stink. Well perhaps excuses are there because of really great reasons. Let yourself assess your own excuses, but also the reason behind them during this episode. 

If you want to understand the male experience on a deeper level, this episode is for you. Men are amazing and are so misunderstood. They are lonely and feel stuck. See if you relate or if you can understand a man in your life just a little bit better.  

People are smart. We don't do things that don't benefit us. Shaming, as negative as you know it is, has benefits. Are the benefits something to seek through shame? I'll let you decide. Walk the journey this episode provides to see why you keep shaming yourself. 

If you're not wanting to hear someone talk about Christ, this episode isn't for you. You find yourself "checking out" or trying to escape on a daily basis. You're tired, exhausted, and just not wanting to stay engaged. I get it. The relationship you build with the things you use to escape is a big deal. This episode will discuss how to change and recognize these relationships and how to replace them with Christ. 

Life is suffering. It isn't and wasn't supposed to be easy. And if you're the hero of your own life's story, you're going to have to overcome some serious obstacles. Should you deny yourself those obstacles? Should you deny their existence? What if the greatest source of suffering is in denying the existence of your issues and not the issues themselves? Listen to find out more. 

The fear of being a burden is real. Your behaviors avoiding it are real as well. Learn what to do with it. Hear a couple great stories that will edify your day and give you courage to show up vulnerably in your relationships. 

Want to hear something a little deeper about gratitude? The holidays emphasize gratitude each year, but I'm betting you haven't thought of gratitude in the way this episode teaches. Your relationships need to be fueled with it and this will show you how. 

This episode takes on a different angle by using Sadie to represent the mind and heart of a wife who's husband has struggled with pornography. She asks really good questions. She discusses the emotional struggle and grief associated with it. Shayden helps her normalize and understand what she can do to move forward. 

In this quick episode you'll learn why apologies need replaced. Trust is hurt when we wrong others, so restituting that trust is essential. You'll also learn a fun parenting tip for when a child lies to you. Don't miss out! 

The greatest deception in life is that approval is love. It isn't!! You need to take a moment to look into yourself and realize the extent to which you've traded love for approval. The impact of living for approval instead of love cannot be underestimated. 

I know this is an episode you might hesitate to click on. The fear of going to therapy is real. It's vulnerable and unknown. The fact is, therapy is a tremendous act of self-love. No matter how many years you've lived on this earth, it can be helpful to understand how your experiences have stacked up inside you.  Give it an honest listen to see if therapy could be helpful for you. 

Want to have a  therapy session without going to therapy? Then put your seatbelt on for this episode and prepare to do some work with yourself, because this episode will do just that. This is episode is a role play of sorts of what I think you might need to talk about if you're like most people.  I know you'll relate to  something in this episode, so don't miss out. 

Vulnerability alert! If you want to get to hear a therapist's insecurities and struggles then here you go. Life is hard. Trauma is misunderstood and both your life and trauma are needed to be reviewed. This episode will help you do just that. 

Your mind is powerful beyond measure, so what controls it? This riddle is answered in this podcast and will for sure make you think and rethink how you think. Make sense? If you want to love yourself more and take control of your inner critic then don't miss this episode. 

Rejection happens to all of you. Sometimes it's intentional and most of the time it isn't. If you're like most, you get anxious and your mind races in a defensive tornado trying to fight back. What if that's exactly the problem? In this episode you'll learn a couple tools to use to know what to do with rejection, plus a bit of a call to action about your own accountability.