Black in the Middle

We kick off Season 4 with a New Years update, unpacking the holidays and getting those baby fresh resolutions on wax. What did we learn in 2022? What does 2023 have in store for The Middle? And what's with all the floppy top hair these days?

On this final Black in the Middle of 2022 we sit down with actor, stand-up comedian and FAMU alum Mateen Stewart. We discuss Mateen's journey from Detroit to Hollywood, all the talent and hustle that got him there and how he found stand-up along the way. Then we get real. Mateen tells us how the unexpected loss of his mother in 2020 changed his life and informs his comedy. Is it hard to be funny in the wake of tragedy? And in this age of cancel culture, what's off-limits onstage? Mateen Stewart is a Detroit native and Los Angeles local. He can be seen on season 9 of Comedy Dynamics' "Coming to the Stage" and in the upcoming film "The Devil Runs Kansas City." Mateen has been featured onscreen with Ben Stiller and Andy Daly and hosts "Late for Work" Sundays at the Hollywood Improv. He is a member of Alpha Phi Alpha Fraternity, Inc. and is a proud graduate of Florida A&M University.

Sometimes you hit RECORD and get more than you bargained for. Every week during our preproduction meeting we keep the tape running, just in case somebody says something profound. Usually all we get is funny nonsense to play before the theme song... This time we got a whole episode. Recorded before our Kanye ep a few weeks back, this Black in the Middle is an off-the-cuff conversation about leadership, motivation, fatherhood and the duality of man.

PAY YOURSELF FIRST. T-Bone's mantra drives this week's Black in the Middle as we tackle another debate from the comment section. Does it make sense to accumulate wealth for future generations even if it comes at the expense of our own enjoyment? Is that our responsibility as black fathers in white America? And if so, how well are we pulling it off?

This episode of Black in the Middle comes straight from the comments section. A social media clip from our interview with The Situational Therapist went viral and... Y'all went off in the comments. Some of you agreed. Some of you disagreed. It was a fantastic back and forth. One comment that really made us think involved White Adjacency, or the idea that POC in white spaces enjoy life advantages based solely on a proximity to whiteness. Do we think that's true? Is it unavoidable in the middle? And does it explain why we've always felt stuck in between? Listen up and find out.

A few weeks ago we had Glenn Sandifer II on the pod to discuss his High Value Man relationship book, 'The Middle Ground.' This week we're cracking the book back open to unpack our thoughts on Mr. Sandifer's theories. Where did we agree? Where did we disagree? And was Herm really mad though?

This week's Black in the Middle is off the cuff as Kanye West invades our regularly scheduled Autumn Update. We discuss Ye's latest controversy and then unpack what's been going on in our three corners of the world... Business, parenting and relationship

This week we sit down with Derrick "The Situational Therapist" Hoard to discuss his path from nuerodivergent child of a tyrannical mother to successful therapist and TikTok star. What starts as an interview develops into something bigger as Tim, Travis and Herman open up about their own parenting and relationship struggles. This is a raw and revealing episode you won't want to miss. Derrick Hoard is a licensed marriage and family therapist, avid gamer, and adult survivor of childhood abuse and neglect. He's also The Situational Therapist, a social media persona he uses to straight talk complex psychological issues and remove the stigma of experiencing childhood abuse. Derrick's sometimes challenging but always engaging videos have amassed over 900K followers on TikTok. 

It's all about the music on this week's pod. The boys take a trip down memory lane and discuss their most influential songs and artist through the different stages of life. We had to reach WAY back into the vault for this previously UNRELEASED episode from Season One. We do not own the rights to any of the music mentioned. All rights belong to the respective owners. No Copyright Infringement Intended.

Romantic relationships are challenging under the best of circumstances. Throw in the rigors of an increasingly demanding business world and you have a recipe for dating frustration and failure. On this week's pod the boys interview author, executive leader, business strategist (and fellow FAMU alum) Glenn Sandifer II. Glenn's new book, The Middle Ground, explores the complex dynamics of business and romance. Herm wants you to know that Glenn's views are his own as we discuss the differences between High Value Men and High Value Women, why there's so much friction when you choose the wrong kind of partner and how successful men can avoid relationship failure in a modern world.

On the heels of Herman's perfect empty house Man Day, we discuss relationships past, present and future. Did we truly leave our toxic traits behind us? How do we build stronger lives with stronger wives? And why did it take fatherhood and 40 to finally feel grown? This week's Black in the Middle answers these questions and more... very carefully. Nobody wants to sleep on the couch.

Everybody wants to be top dog, but the Social Dominance Hierarchy is a lot more nuanced than the Alpha/Beta framework we were taught. Success means teaming with players all across the personality spectrum and we all shift in and out of different roles, so how do we navigate this complex world of Gammas and Deltas? This week the Black in the Middle crew debunks the myth of the Alpha Male (and gives the Beta his come up) while trying to answer the age-old question, 'What kind of man are you?'

Desmond Carr is back for PART 2 of our retrospective on his entrepreneurial journey. This week we talk about the importance of Winning as a Team, Challenging the Status Quo and Desmond's secret to No Limits Living. Then we cap things off with a discussion of Legacy, Comeback Stories and the founding of Rally Gin.

Lifelong friend and brilliant entrepreneur Desmond Carr is in the house this week. In PART 1 of this two-part interview, we discuss Desmond's career journey from Kansas City to Los Angeles (and every stop in between), the Found Family philosophy that has kept us all tight over the years, the pitfalls of Corporate America and Paving a Personal Path to Success. We also argue Cryptocurrency, which Travis still thinks is dumb.

Our country feels more and more divided every day. With people so wrapped up in their political, social and religious ideology, hatred is drowning out discourse. Every disagreement feels like war. Your boys are back discuss how disturbing blind devotion can be in a world overrun with lies, and whether our own strongly-held beliefs might deserve a closer look.

We are three black dudes from the no coast and we are not about to sit here and talk about how banning abortion in America will affect us. That will be in part 2 of this series with special guest. However, when looking at this drastic move through a political lens, the Black in the Middle crew has pinpointed a conservative strategy for this country's return to states rights. That's what this episode is about and it's a rollercoaster of a ride. Hang on friends.

Join us for a laughter packed episode as the crew updates you with what is on the minds of men who are black while living in the middle of white America.

Patriotism is the feeling of love, devotion, and sense of attachment to one's country. As Black American men, this is changing...and we're not so sure how to deal with it. Listen as the crew unpacks how current and past events painting a different picture of our future in America.

If you look at it, it only makes sense that America is becoming exactly what it should based on Individualism & Entitlement as Norms. America was built on brutality, dehumanization and what we are experiencing with violence fits in perfectly with America's story. What are the elements of a culture? Are we too competitive as a country, as a people? Why does America feel like we're not all in this together? And What to do about it?

There is a group forming, or already present, inside your neighborhood high school and it is potentially stoking fear and amplifying racial and political division within the student population.  Turning Point USA is a 501(c)3 non-profit organization founded in 2012 by Charlie Kirk. The organization says its "mission is to identify, educate, train, and organize students to promote the principles of freedom, free markets, and limited government. Turning Point USA believes that every young person can be enlightened to true free market values." Kyle Rittenhouse was a keynote speaker at a Turning Point event in 2021. The group seems to be Pro-Trump on most issues with other notable associated people and brands include Sebastian Gorka (ties to Vitezi Rend) far- right anti-semitic org, Alan West and Mike Lindell - My Pillow guy. Tune into this episode and get ready for what happens next.

The Who, What, When, Where but we have no idea as to the Why. We say this often but it seems like it's still the same old shit, just a different group of people now suffering from unspeakable loss. You telling us nothing has changed in 23 years? We'll talk about the politicization that always happens, again, nothing has changed. Have you heard some of the ridiculous solutions being proposed by your elected officials? Yes, one door. Well we have some out of the box thinking for you today.  Also, why is it always dudes? This is an episode talking about the things we should actually be talking about. And at the end of the day, at the very end of the day…we think it's just the culture. Tune in and stay tuned in. 

Over 3 seasons of recording has gotten us to Episode number 100 ya'll! The crew celebrates this accomplishment by reflecting on the body work created thus far. This episode unpacks the crew's favorites, fan favorites, those that didn't make the cut and episode topics of the future. Oh yeah and we went live on Facebook for some strange reason. So there's that. Enjoy!

It's an interesting game of cat and mouse. On the heels of our last episode around Will smith; figured it would be a good time to expand on what the world witnessed: It was confidence that allowed him to go on stage, but unpacking it gave off major vibes of insecurity. Let's go!

In lieu of the Will Smith (53) Chris Rock (57) slap heard round the world, we figured now would be a good time to answer the question “When is violence the answer?” In this episode the crew recaps what happened, weighs in on the choice of a slap versus a punch, talks about public humiliation, the effect on the Smith children and explores alternative remedies for this strange, jaw dropping situation. What did Will Smith Reaffirm in the minds of “other races” with his actions? Did he effectively send a message for future jokes about his wife or do you think the most hilarious comedy special is in the works? Would he have hit a white comedian? Female? Will said “Love will make you do crazy things”, but was that actually love that we witnessed? Tune in for answers to these questions in more on the latest Black in the Middle Podcast episode. 

We live in an ever changing society and the evolution of sexual orientation and gender identity are two that always seem to rile the headlines. The crew decided to unpack this topic a bit on this latest episode and not only comment on what we have seen thus far in sports and media but also predict what we may see in the near future.

This episode is about when Racism...and all the other ism's...take a back seat to the atrocities and turmoil that is going on in the world. How are you living your life different with so much uncertainty in the near future? When you look around, everything is moving along very normal, but were all are probably thinking the same thing, when is the other shoe going to drop and what brand is said shoe? The crew ponders these questions and many more in this episode of Black in the Middle podcast.

When celebrating a milestone in Daddy Watson's professional career turns into a A semi-morbid podcast episode. This is that! Join the crew as we explore the question, if we died untimely, what do we have in place for our son's to have a strong, male influence to get the support he needs that momma may not be able to provide. What does that look like? What can we expect of others? What do we need to do now? All that and more from your favorite Kansas City based podcast crew, Tim, Travis and Herman.

You know what time it is. The crew goes in on Russia and all of the craziness that they have started. SMH

Theodis is KC born and bred; a Missouri State Grad with an MBA and is very active in central city communities, making a positive difference any way he can. He has spent the past 20 years in banking - most recent years have been on the commercial lending side. Who is Theodis Watson?The differences in banksRelationships with your bankerThe importance of financial literacyBridging the wealth gapTeaching our kids earlyBanking myth-bustersAll banks are not created equalManaging finances as a coupleThe effects of the pandemic This episode is jam packed with personal budgeting tips (especially those households with an Amazon obsession) AND business financial guidance for the entrepreneur in you. Check out this special guest interview that is full of tips, jokes, stories and TONS of resources to help you get your money right.  Enjoy!

New year, same ish...part two? This month's update became a bit emotional as the crew relived the sad ending to a great Kansas City Chiefs season. We couldn't be more proud but we obviously gonna talk about the other side of the coin. Tune in for this and more topics in politics, pop culture, business, personal and more like: A Las Vegas Pro Bowl, NFL hiring practices in question, The Brian Flores lawsuit, Is anyone watching the Olympics?, A McDonalds surf and turf, The rise of subscription prices, Too much of Nelly, What to do about Joe Rogan and Black History Month

Are you ready to die for America or the idea of freedom? We know are brave veterans are but what about you? This episode breaks down what we love about our country; things like diversity, opportunity, education k-12, civil liberties, the Super Bowl, etc. And what we dislike or hate; things like our healthcare system, political system, legal system and every other racist framework this country thrives on. Join in and maybe we'll change how you feel...or maybe not.

Scorpio Horn is the Head Football Coach and Director of Development at KIPP KC, a local charter school that is making waves. Scorpio, or Scorp as we call him, is a good, long-time friend of the BITM crew, so it was great to sit down and talk about things we all love: football, leadership, parenting and equity.

What kind of schools did you go to growing up? Are you giving your kids the same experience you had or making sure they never have to go through what you did? With school age kids and a couple of big decisions ahead, the crew unpacks this age old debate. This episode will explore learning how to learn at an early age, the parent factor when it comes to which type of school, community issues, or lack thereof, outcomes, classroom size, taxes, programming, testing, curriculum, teachers networking and of course cost. Let's go, time to take ya'll to school.

Well, 2020too is here. How you doin? Yeah, that's what we thought. Same. Just like the new year, we had big plans and ideas about our first episode but things ain't really go that route. Nonetheless, this episode is fire as we push each other out of our comfort zones and open up about how we will attack the new year and achieve our goals...even after a slower than desired start. Leggo!

... an episode where I can talk about all the things I REALLY want for Christmas because Lord knows the only ones getting what they actually want are under the age of 15. So let's bring ourselves job and take a trip down a memory lane that is full of nostalgia, wishfulness and maybe a few dreams come true.

What leads someone to have a victim mentality? What if we wasn't set back as black people? Would we be as resilient, amazing, hard working as we are? Victim Mentality is defined as an acquired personality trait in which a person tends to recognize or consider themselves as a victim of the negative actions of others, and to behave as if this were the case in the face of contrary evidence of such circumstances Are we victims and if so of what? Oh, and let's not forget to talk about white victimhood and its surge during the 2016 Presidential election as well as most recently with Kyle Rittenhouse.

Lots to discuss during this holiday season: Ahmaud Arbery trial, the Rittenhouse trial and acquittal and what this means, a Michigan high school shooter and the parents' liability, Celebrity vaccine fakers, the Metaverse and the speed of development, a deadly concert by Travis Scott, what's new on Netflix right meow, Delta variants and more!

Is intelligence genetic? Does hard work really pay? We all say “everything happen for a reason", but does it though? It's time to demystify these terms and phrases a lot of us find ourselves saying and even living by on a daily basis. But wait, there's more! The crew questions the Death Penalty, assisted suicide, churches and taxes and short detours from these mainstream, controversial concepts. Enjoy!

Is it better to be honest about money or put up a facade? And why? Is there a benefit to lying, being frugal, flat out stunting?  Were you ever stunting? What was it for? Have you ever been cautious about stunting? How honest are you about money with your kids?  Get answers to these questions and more from the midwestern black middle class perspective by pressing play!

The crew tackles a lot in this months edition of the Update. From What is the Metaverse, Let's Go Brandon aka F Joe Biden to discussing Killings on Set, Cancel Culture News, topics were plentiful in this "getting colder" month of October.

Chivalry is the combination of qualities expected of a knight: courage, honor, courtesy, justice, and readiness to help the weak. So, is it dead? Can it live on through Tinder? Staying friends with your exes can be fine and healthy, right? Is marriage is no longer necessary? Are you a better husband or a better father? Can you be both at the same time? The BITM crew answers these and other questions that challenge the status quo of what it is supposed to mean to be a man and a women in todays world.

Close your eyes and imagine 3 guys by the names of Tim, Travis and Herman who grew up in the burbs, played sports, got good grades, stayed out of trouble, drove boats, went to college, got jobs, tipped handsomely, had loving families and started a podcast...but Tim, Travis and Herman were 3 white dudes. Would anyone listen to their podcast? Would they be special? Would they feel special? Hmmm...you'll have to listen to find out.

The Midwest, and the Kansas City metro specifically, has recently fallen victim to more racist scandals than normal. 4 incidents in southern, northern and eastern suburbs have made local and even national news over the last 2 weeks, putting our covertly racist 2 state area on the map. When it comes to these things happening over social media, should we even be surprised at this point? The crew unpacks this and traverses both sides of the argument in this episode. 

This update is full of topics and news that popped off in September. Sitting in a room with Kanye for an hour vs Drake for an hour...what are your takeaways, Chiefs, Alabama for the first time reported more deaths than births, mRNA and a simple vaccine explanation by Herman, Haitian vs Afghan refugees, Nola wants to go to her first HS football game with friends, Donda vs. CLB, being from the Late 1900's, Fugees going on tour and so much more happening this Fall.

When 50% of black population live in the south and you're not in a city like D.C., Chicago or Detroit, do you feel that because you are raised suburban versus urban that you need to justify your blackness? The crew unpacks this question and many others in this episode. How black is your home? Do you feel like your sexual/life partner selection makes you need to justify your blackness? Tim says that once you mix and mingle cultures your blackness erodes. With that said, does that exude in your everyday life? What about if the roles are reversed?

We don't want to get canceled for this episode, but it's been on the docket for a good minute. I mean, we've all dated outside our race but decided to take a step back and ask ourselves questions like: When did you start dating outside your race & why? What race was she/he? How much of an issue was it at home? Were you accepted? How much did you think about race? Can you support diversity and be against mixed race relationships? And many more questions!

These are the most burning, semi-racist, personally-invasive, but real questions that not-black...okay maybe some black...people have asked us or people who look like us.  Take it away, Karen.

Grab a Cliff bar, an apple or something off the $1 menu because you might get hungry listening to this episode. How important was food in your household growing up? What were some of the ways food made you into the person you are today? The crew tackles these questions about most of our favorite thing to do - eat, and they do it without a morsel in sight.  This is the food episode so stick with BITM as the journeys through life's lessons, challenges and experiences through the lens of mastication.

It's August and the weather is perfect, football is back, kids going to school and white people are going extinct. This episode is packed with jokes, facts, tips, politics, pop culture references, disasters, memories and more! 

Herman was recently asked, "Who are you?" No he wasn't interviewing for a new job but this introspective exercise to knowing thyself was helpful in putting together a long term plan for himself, his fam and his career. So let's give a shot shall we!? The crew answers questions about their most important personal possessions, true motivation, areas they've made progress in, areas they lack in, greatest struggles that taught the greatest lessons and things they need to let go of...among others.

Let's see here: not leaving the house, not bathing, contemplating life, love and the loss of some hopes and dreams and feeling a bit of anxiety and apathy about things. Sounds like a midlife crisis to me, oh wait, that's just the pandemic. Listen to the crew as they unpack the similarities between the pandemic that covid-19 has put us all in and a midlife crisis. Wait...what happens if you're going through both at the same time? Fuuuhhhh.... This episode is not all doom and gloom. The crew comes up with solutions on how to get ahead of a midlife crisis" as well as how to deal with one.