Midlifing

Send us Fan MailA Devo earworm at a Sardinian birthday party is the unlikely start of a conversation about what expertise actually is. Lee draws on Collins and Evans's distinction between interactional and contributory expertise, and the two probe whether AI is simply the pinnacle of sounding like it knows what it's doing, and what that means for the hours both of them have put into embodied practices. Simon ends up confessing to late-night vibe coding, somewhere in the murky territory between hating it and loving it.MentionedDevo's "Whip It" (1980) – new wave song; came up when a community group with the acronym WIP sparked a group singalong at a birthday party in SardegnaWIP – community organisation in Sardegna; the acronym's unusual capitalisation convention (only the first letter uppercase) became a topic in itselfUK Government White Paper on Post-16 Skills – published by DSIT in November; prompted reflection on what specialism and expertise mean in the age of AIRethinking Expertise (Harry Collins and Robert Evans) – academic book introducing the distinction between interactional expertise (talking the talk) and contributory expertise (advancing a field through practice)Malcolm Gladwell / 10,000 hours – the idea that mastery requires 10,000 hours of deliberate practice; cited and gently questionedLord of the Flies (William Golding) – briefly referenced as a comic false attribution when trying to recall Gladwell's nameVibe coding – AI-assisted web development; tried late one night building an interactive front page, with mixed feelings about itClaude – AI assistant; mentioned as the tool used for writing template-heavy applicationsGet in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us Fan MailSimon is recording from Sassari, where the barn doors have just gone in and the pace of life feels unrecognisably slow. A conversation about loitering with intent – a legal phrase that turns out to be untranslatable into Portuguese – opens into a wide-ranging examination of third spaces, billionaires, and the frictionlessness of modern commerce: what the UK has lost, and why. Lee's account of an unplanned evening in Lisbon, ending with the three of them eavesdropping on an orchestra rehearsing through a church door, becomes the episode's counterpoint and its argument: that the best days are the ones that just keep opening.MentionedSassari – city in Sardinia; Simon is recording from there mid-renovation on a place he has in the cityMinority Report – Tom Cruise film involving pre-crime; cited as the logical endpoint of loitering with intent as a thought crimeCocktail – Tom Cruise film initially named instead of Minority Report; the mix-up launches a long digressionBryan Brown – Australian actor who appeared in Cocktail with Tom Cruise; his character's fate in the film briefly discussedRichard Chamberlain – actor; mentioned in connection with Cocktail and then The Thorn Birds and ShogunThe Thorn Birds – TV miniseries; Richard Chamberlain connection discussedShogun – TV miniseries; Richard Chamberlain confirmed as lead [?] – transcript garbled hereDoctor Kildare – TV series; Richard Chamberlain's earlier role, mentioned in passingJason Bourne / The Bourne series – Matt Damon spy franchise; invoked as another example of a character who wakes without his memory [?] – conversation unclear on whether the Bourne / Chamberlain thread was resolvedTilted Arc – Richard Serra sculpture [transcript says "Richard Sarah"] installed in Federal Plaza, New York; designed to bifurcate the plaza and force pedestrians around it; cited as an example of productive friction in public spaceRichard Sennett – writer and sociologist; invoked for his writing on friction in urban spaces and city lifeToo Good To Go – food waste app; compared between Coventry (mostly chain confectionery) and Sassari (independent grocers and green goods)Lievetta – artisan bakery in Sassari; slow-fermented, whole-grain bread; discussed as a surprising success in a city used to plainer loavesKeir Starmer – mentioned briefly as the kind of figure who has a public life in the institutional sensePink Street – famous nightclub street in Lisbon; described as culturally hollowed out after the last Portuguese-owned venue closedLucas – cocktail maker at a Lisbon bar; produced Japanese plum hooch from under the counter for an impromptu drink [last name unknown]Gilles – owner of a Lisbon restaurant serving Cabo Verdean cuisine through a Portuguese lens; met during the same unplanned eveningCabo Verde / Cape Verdean cuisine – the culinary tradition of Gilles's restaurant; described as African food filtered through Portuguese flavoursGet in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us Fan MailSimon opens with a psychology experiment about misattributed arousal -- cross a rickety bridge feeling anxious, and you might mistake that adrenaline for attraction to whoever meets you on the other side -- and uses it as a prompt to ask Lee what emotions he feels most commonly. Lee lands on shame and guilt as uniquely useless (false friends that teach nothing, unlike anxiety or joy), then describes the untrammeled, leg-kicking happiness that sometimes overtakes him on a train crossing the River Tamar. The conversation moves through Grindr statistics at Republican conventions, a sudden bout of rage, and a father's urgent text that turned out to be about Peppa Pig.Mentioned- Grindr – gay hookup app; cited in connection with reported spikes in usage during Republican Party conventions, used to illustrate how shame can hide behind public moralising about LGBTQIA+ rights- Republican Party conventions – referenced in relation to the Grindr statistics and the argument that political shamelessness often conceals private shame- River Tamar – river in the southwest of England; the train crossing it is the setting for a description of sudden, involuntary joy- Corvids – bird family; mentioned to explain why a magpie on the balcony had worked out how to use a tit feeder designed to exclude larger birds- Peppa Pig – children's animated series; the actual subject of an "urgent" text from a parent, which arrived mid-meeting and caused several minutes of low-level panic- Netflix – streaming platform; the medium through which Peppa Pig became a domestic emergencyGet in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us Fan MailLee has developed a habit he can't fully explain: he spends his walks listening to AI-generated voices read Reddit's most morally contested family disputes, swiping through them pocket-blind on his phone while his wife Bob removes herself from the room entirely. Simon has been watching The Pittt and finding himself deep in the YouTube rabbit hole of Dr. Mike, a physician with eight million followers who spent an episode patiently holding his ground in a room full of anti-vaxxers with flags. Together they turn over the question of why low-stakes moral soap opera – almost certainly fictional – scratches an itch that harder content never quite reaches.Mentioned- The Pitt (TV show) – medical procedural drama; praised for its realism and intensity; compared favourably to ER; its makers were sued by Michael Crichton's widow over similarities to ER- ER (TV show) – 1990s medical drama created by Michael Crichton; watched back to back with The Pitt as an informal comparison- Michael Crichton – creator of ER and Jurassic Park; his estate brought legal action against The Pitt's makers claiming it was an unacknowledged reboot- Dr. Mike – YouTube creator with around 8 million followers; known for medical show breakdowns; discussed for his patient, measured performance in a debate surrounded by anti-vaxxers- AITA / Am I The Asshole – Reddit community in which users submit personal moral dilemmas for public judgment; its stories are repurposed as AI-generated YouTube shorts with sped-up voices; the source of Lee's pocket-swiping habit- amoral familism (familismo amorale) – sociological concept developed in 1950s-60s research; the idea that extreme loyalty to the immediate family degrades broader civic culture; mentioned while unpicking the ethics of the airport Thanksgiving story- The Life of Chuck – film based on a Stephen King novella, starring Tom Hiddleston; recommended as a work in progress- Carrie (1976) – Stephen King adaptation; cited approvingly; prompts a brief tribute to Sissy Spacek- Sissy Spacek – actor; praised for her performance in Carrie; briefly distinguished from Susan SarandonGet in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us Fan MailSimon opens with news: a colleague complimented his secondhand trousers, though he fails to mention he'd just sat through an important meeting with the fly jammed open. A digression via Sort Your Life Out – a decluttering show that leaves him reaching for the language of the divine – opens into a conversation about whether the body ever forgets its training, sparked by Lee's account of a Vera Montero solo and Bob's observation that ballet doesn't fully let you go. By the end they're in the territory of the Ozempic Economy: a Korean philosopher's framework for understanding why, in late capitalism, the self becomes the last thing left to optimise.Mentioned- Sort Your Life Out with Stacey Solomon and Dilla Carter (TV show) – decluttering and makeover series; Simon finds it compulsive and a little triggering; the guests' reaction of "Oh my God" to their transformed homes becomes a prompt for a riff on secular transcendence- Hockey Smut – Lee's project around queer identity in sport; a local ice hockey team discovered it, prompting mixed reactions from players- Trio A (1966, Yvonne Rainer) – postmodern dance work; cited as the famous example of pedestrian movement that paradoxically becomes virtuosic through its refusal to emphasise anything- Vera Montero – Portuguese choreographer and performer; Lee saw her in a solo supported by four violinists; her flexed feet and facial effort unsettled him in ways he needed Bob to help him process; discussed as an example of earlier ballet training leaving a residue that resists being shed- London Marathon – Simon ran it; used as an example of attending carefully to running form, then watching it dissolve as faster runners in every conceivable style streamed past- Thomas Chan – Instagram creator; introduced Byung-Chul Han's ideas in relation to current culture and the Ozempic Economy- Byung-Chul Han – Korean philosopher; author of The Burnout Society and The Transparency Society; his framework used as a lens on what GLP-1 drugs say about late capitalism- Ozempic / GLP-1 drugs – weight-loss injections (Wegovy, Mounjaro, Ozempic named); discussed as emblematic of a pharmacological capitalism that promises frictionlessness by removing the "wrong" body from view- Looks Maxing – online subculture rooted in red-pill ideology; involves extreme physical self-optimisation including mewing and leg-lengthening surgery; introduced via Clavicular, a figure in the newspapers- Mewing – tongue-positioning technique associated with Looks Maxing, claimed to reshape the jawline- Red pill / The Matrix – the ideological frame behind Looks Maxing; discussed briefly and dismissedGet in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us Fan MailWhat do you do when someone asks if you liked something and the honest answer is "it's just not for me"? Simon and Lee explore how taste works – how it forms, how it shifts depending on who's in the room, and why saying something is "shit" is often just laziness dressed up as confidence. Along the way: sharks on planes, Pina Bausch via Tilda Swinton, Coldplay's complicated legacy, and a standing ovation nobody stood for.Mentioned- "Thrash" -- shark/hurricane disaster film; Lee watched it on a plane back from Lisbon, wriggling in his seat- Glen Powell -- actor; appears in the romcom "Set It Up"- Zoe Deutch -- actor (Lea Thompson's daughter); co-stars in "Set It Up"- "Set It Up" (2018) -- romcom Simon watched for distraction, possibly a rewatch- Peter Jackson's Beatles documentary "Get Back" -- referenced as an 8-hour documentary- Akram Khan -- British-Bangladeshi choreographer; front-row sweat anecdotes, early career shows- Coldplay -- band; discussed at length re: cool, taste, and politics- Chris Martin -- Coldplay frontman; known for writing political slogans on his hands- Snow Patrol -- band; used as a cool/uncool comparison with Coldplay- Radiohead -- band; controversy over performing in Israel- Nick Cave -- musician; mentioned alongside Radiohead re: Israel performances- Wim Wenders -- German film director; made the Pina Bausch documentary "Pina"- "Pina" (2011, dir. Wim Wenders) -- documentary about Pina Bausch; Lee found it very boring- Pina Bausch -- German expressionist choreographer; subject of the Wenders documentary- "Cafe Muller" -- famous Pina Bausch dance-theatre piece- "Suspiria" (2018) -- Tilda Swinton plays a Pina Bausch-like character; Lee's recommended alternative to the documentary- Tilda Swinton -- actor; plays the Pina Bausch character in Suspiria- Diana Nipsa -- choreographer; created "Hornfuckers," seen by Lee and Bob in Lisbon- "Hornfuckers" -- dance piece by Diana Nipsa; front-row experience, disputed standing ovation- "Jay Kelly" -- George Clooney ensemble film about acting and its absurdities; Simon watched it with his sister and niece- George Clooney -- actor/director; made "Jay Kelly"Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us Fan MailA chance remark in a New York bar in 1991 — "you're an idealist" — lands differently than expected. Simon and Lee trace that moment through the topsy-turviness of political labels, from Antifa on a Lisbon rooftop to the day idealism became an insult. Along the way: growing up under IRA bombs and Cold War dread, algorithmically sorted fear, and whether a badly-timed fart rules out the simulation.Mentioned- Wall Street (1987, dir. Oliver Stone) — discussed as cautionary tale vs celebration of greed; Gordon Gekko, Michael Douglas, Charlie Sheen- Platoon (Oliver Stone)- Born on the 4th of July (Oliver Stone)- Supergirl (film, trailer) — discussed; CGI dog face controversy- John Wick — mentioned in comparison to Supergirl's dog-in-peril setup- Good Boy (horror film) — cited for a dog considered an excellent actor- Stonewall — NYC bar and landmark; site of the 1969 uprising- Marsha P. Johnson — activist; cited for throwing the first brick at Stonewall, pivotal for US gay rights- Antifa — political movement; discussed in context of linguistic and political inversion- Trump — mentioned in context of Antifa during his first term- Jillian — babysitter from childhood story; spent her savings on a Vidal Sassoon haircut- Vidal Sassoon — hairdresser, mentioned in Jillian story- IRA — cited in context of childhood anxiety and mainland Britain bombings- Chernobyl — cited as example of proximate vs remote political anxiety (New Zealand vs UK)- BBC — cited for one-sided reporting on the IRA- Jeffrey Miller — the dogGet in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us Fan MailSimon finds himself crying for multiple things at once. Lee reflects on being largely inoculated from grief since childhood, always the supporter, never quite allowed his own response. An honest conversation about mortality, what we carry, and Swedish death cleaning.MentionsTouch by Ashley Montague — cited for the observation that "touch" has the longest entry in the Oxford English Dictionary, longer even than "love"Concentric circles of grief — diagram showing inner/outer circles for determining who gives support vs. who can express grief outward; discussed in context of knowing your place in someone else's bereavementSwedish death cleaning — practice of clearing possessions before death so loved ones aren't burdened with sorting them; Lee's mum has done this, including getting rid of 400 books2012 Olympics — mentioned as a turning point when arts funding was redirected and a number of mid-scale venues closed, contributing to the decline of the UK live arts scene ahead of BrexitGet in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us Fan MailLee and Simon move from the absurd grind of international transit and the ways money buys freedom from friction into a sharper reflection on systems, meritocracy and the stories we tell about fairness. The episode lands somewhere quieter and more human, with transhumanism and techno-hope set against goodbye, touch, family and the fragile consolation of ordinary love.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send a textLee and Simon reflect on certainty, persuasion and the strange dead-end of “that's just a fact,” moving from Louis Theroux's Inside the Manosphere to questions of shininess, inherited politics and why some surfaces feel impossible to trust. They then swing into a wedding report from Lake Wānaka, where being firmly in the oldies camp still ends with a dance-off, a Virginian falsetto and the instruction to dance like you've got no hair.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send a textLee and Simon reflect on waking up feeling anxious amid talk of global conflict, distance from home, and the strange experience of feeling both safe and unsettled while travelling. The conversation moves between geopolitical dread and everyday life – trousers, weddings, beauty and awe – arriving at a fragile commitment to grace, kindness and continuing on anyway.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send a textLee and Simon find themselves time-travelling: through a tennis racket that returns a 57-year-old body to its 15-year-old instincts (apart from the inconvenient eyes), and through faces from 1980s school corridors flickering inside present-day skin. They circle the pleasure and awkwardness of reunion – what it means to want connection, to resist it, and to recognise the same gesture surviving four decades.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send a textLee and Simon explore Simon's return to New Zealand and the deep, embodied sense of “home” he feels there, distinct from the buildings or habits that mark belonging elsewhere. They circle the gradations of alienness across places – London, Lisbon, Italy, the US – and reflect on privilege, inequality, and the uneasy freedom to move between worlds.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send a textSimon and Lee discuss how “the slop” of online discourse warps attention, community, and even basic ways of being with other people, then land on the uneasy idea that conversation can be as much a mirror (to feel real and worthy) as a window (to actually learn and connect). A second thread is the double-truth of social life: feeling useful and coherent while simultaneously hearing the inner heckler saying “you're a fraud,” and how that vulnerability can push people toward bubbles that reassure them.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send a textLee and Simon talk about ageing, visibility and bodily maintenance, moving from Tai Chi scams and ripped male bodies to the uneven cultural tolerance of ageing faces, especially women's. The thread tightens around choosing how to age – attitude over appearance – while catching themselves mid-slide into weather-moaning, grammar-policing crotchetiness.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textSimon and Lee reflect on how “it's just history” can function as a shield, contrasting nostalgia and certainty with the messier ethics of speaking up, particularly around homophobia and memory. The episode widens this to a mistrust of technological truth-claims, arguing for caution, empathy and interrogation over easy laughter or false neutrality.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textLee and Simon talk about Heated Rivalry as hockey smut, using it to think about bonkbusters, fan fiction, masculinity and the manosphere, and why gay male romance written by and for straight women feels culturally charged. They contrast escapist fantasy with realism, testing where disbelief breaks (coming out in elite sport, hockey culture) and where emotional truth still lands.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textLee and Simon move from bread, travel and pensions into a sharper conversation about advertising, sustainability and how language quietly manipulates trust. What starts as midlife logistics ends in unease about media ethics and the stories we are trained to accept.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textLee and Simon discuss overload: storms, sickness, media saturation, and a growing sense that attention itself is the battleground. They land on “what we ignore” as a survival skill, using sport, news, and desire as case studies for selective blindness and unexpected meaning.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textLee and Simon reflect on ageing through ordinary shocks – driving at night, learning languages badly in public, and realising your social stamina has quietly changed. The episode circles the relief of opting out (sleep, simple food, cinema marathons) versus the effort of keeping up, without pretending either choice is noble.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textLee and Simon reflect on the turn of the year not through resolutions but through attention to time, labour, and value – what feels worth doing, and what quietly drains energy. The conversation circles embodied work, intergenerational thinking, and the midlife urge to spend less time reacting and more time building things that outlast you.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textLee and Simon circle from Christmas silliness to showers, cocktails, bureaucracy, and grief, using humour to hold off the end-of-the-world feeling while letting something tender through. Beneath the ramble, the episode quietly lands on memory, loss, and the strange intimacy of ordinary rituals.Related link:I Asked 64,182 People About “Jingle Bells, Batman Smells”. Here's What I Found Out: https://youtu.be/V5u9JSnAAU4?si=3bZKOd90pUXNdZFpGet in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textLee and Simon circle around the messy line between saying “no” (as self-respect) and staying relational, using condominum meetings, Portuguese/Italian slips, and a post office queue as lived examples of how “transactional” life can feel. They land on the idea that some exchanges (kindness, levity, basic decency) aren't quid-pro-quo at all – and then veer into unfiltered joy at Olivia Colman's acceptance speeches.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textSimon and Lee spiral from the weird intimacy of recording their friendship into the horror of AI-fuelled “chatfishing” and the prospect of being “back on the market” after loss. They end up sitting with ageing, death, and the line between cherished solitude, unacknowledged loneliness, and the hunger for simple physical affection.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textLee talks about realising how “thin-skinned” he is at home and at work, and how that sensitivity both hurts (wanting to cry over a throwaway comment about his clothes) and helps him get more quickly to the truth of what's actually going on emotionally. He and Simon fold this into a wider question of whether you want to be “a radiator or a drain” in relationships, and how different couples' styles of teasing or volatility shape what feels possible or survivable in a long-term partnership.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textSimon and Lee chew over how trauma and pain can't really be compared or ranked, even inside cushioned-but-precarious academic lives where people still don't feel safe. They then push a fraught hypothetical about raising a daughter into a misogynist world.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textLee and Simon meet in person for the first time in three years and move from gallbladder scares and overstretched health systems into a reflection on post-pandemic disconnection, social capital and the erosion of community. They sit with the discomfort of feeling more willing to be “a doer, the joiner” abroad than in the UK, and the unsettling knowledge that not joining in also helps democracy to unravel.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textLee's rebellious gallbladder and the realisation that he's not “a box with a brain in it” spark a conversation about midlife bodies that can no longer be ignored. From Lisbon-airport dehydration to shamelessly helping-while-queue-jumping anxious Americans, they sit with the mix of pride, shame and “curiosity, not judgement” toward other people's (and their own) fragilities.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textLee and Simon explore what it means to remove yourself – physically and psychically – from one life while tentatively building another. A wardrobe installation in Sassari becomes an existential reflection on identity, work and the quiet liberation of decoupling.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textA lively riff on “Good luck to you Leo Grande” becomes a tender meditation on grief, intimacy and how performances can feel “mannered” or disappear into truth. Plus a quick detour into house anatomy -- those elusive eaves and the ever-misnamed “Gabel end.”Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textLee arrives wildly apologetic (sugar hangover and “pre-arranged lateness”), then recounts a calm immigration-enforcement raid spotted on a dog walk where Jeff and Poppy bristled first. The pair unpack the crowd's quiet “witnessing,” the shaky economics versus the “beautifully shiny ideology” of such raids, and how immigration talk often masks racism.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textSimon's grim HMO viewing – “a cupboard with a toilet in it” – kicks off a sharp rant about rent, greed and our own complicity in gentrification (yes, palazzo included). Lee's just out of Covid, still “quite brain foggy,” as they juggle setup jitters, wool-winding, and the uneasy balance of rights vs responsibilities.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textToday's episode sits between worlds: Lee's COVID-brain-fog ramble collides with Simon's identity shift as Sardinia becomes a “forever home.” The mood is excited but tender: new kitchen colours, shallow washing machines, and the coat of academia starting not to fit.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textEarly-morning chaos (Jefrey's squeaky-toy alarms and “Dr. Claggy” cinnamon-bun focaccia) spirals into a tender-but-fiery riff on migration, tribalism, and the everyday bureaucracy of moving lives across borders.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textThe chat spins from joking about posthumous albums into a deep dive on Bowie, The Beatles, and Peter Jackson's Get Back, with Simon realizing he might be the “Paul McCartney” of his work life. Meanwhile, the two reflect on trust, apologies, and which Beatle they'd most like to be.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textA tummy bug led to a missed call, sending Simon into a gently comic spiral of catastrophising while Lee nursed ginger ale. They laugh about phones, worry, and how fast our minds jump to worst-case scenarios.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textFrom crocodile-flatbread daydreams to bake-off blunders, the chat lands on pressure and nerves: how we choke in high-stakes moments yet sail when we're wearing a role. A gentle riff on anxiety, agency and tiny cues (like “6.9 minutes”) that make being human weirdly manageable.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textLee and Simon chat about how being “smart” has turned into a bit of a buzzword, popping up everywhere from phones to fabrics to how people talk about each other. They wonder if it's really that important, especially when things like reliability and good questions often matter more.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textLee and Simon drift from lighthearted chatter about films, music, and horror-comedies into a deeper reflection on fairness, empathy, and how business rules affect personal relationships. What begins with K-pop demon hunters and Coen Brothers ends with a heartfelt unpacking of hurt, rules, and the weight of being treated “just like everyone else.”Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textLee and Simon muse on the strangeness of plastic-covered furniture and saving things for best, linking it to habits of consumerism and care.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textLee and Simon discuss how their understanding of success has changed, from youthful drive and ambition to the satisfaction of doing things well.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textLee and Simon discuss podcast recording quirks, Italian language and food, the difficulty of finding good restaurants in Rome, and the virtues of immigrant-run eateries. They detour into cocktail adventures, running habits, architectural quirks in old houses, and auditory remedies involving bad covers of Sade's Smooth Operator. Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textLee and Simon reflect warmly and self-critically on moments of unintended unkindness, exploring how irony, tone, and long-honed habits can cause harm even when the intention is to connect. They discuss the complexities of authenticity, performance, and informality—especially in academic or professional contexts—while gently mocking themselves and each other with characteristic affection (at least that's what chatGPT said).Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textLee and Simon navigate tech issues, family estrangement, censorship, and a terrible Wimbledon defeat.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textSimon and Lee swap stories about how AI makes writing easier and helps smooth out prickly emails, even if they feel a bit uneasy about it all. They also talk a bit about underpants, academic jargon, and the oddities of midlife.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textLee and Simon discuss whether they're in a second act or nearing the end of their working lives. They reflect on legacy, how little most of us are remembered, and how not having children changes that.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textSimon reflects on feeling in and out of control while managing tinnitus; Lee discusses boxers, rewilding sleep, and lime wall repairs.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textSimon shares a new tinnitus struggle; Lee discusses scones; both reflect on midlife pride, sleep, and renovation woes.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textLee and Simon go from jam donut focaccia to knitting mistakes, obscure theatre shows to random celebrity run-ins – just the regular midlifing drift.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textLee and Simon talk about high school reunions before Simon launches a broadside against Meta (and gets a little hot under the collar) and then they finish with a quick chat about pronoia. Things covered: Bob and Lee's 29th wedding anniversary, Simon's 40 year high school reunion, reminiscence bump, the consequential things that happen to us when we are young, who we are is context, Lee rodding a drain (in Lisbon), home repairs in another country, Lee still talking about drains, the minds of two men (from a listener), saying gidday to Pete, something about Meta and Instagram and the advertising model, Zuckerberg's Hot or Not, the cultural role in how the advertising model functions, the horror of Instagram's algorithm, pronoia (Fred Goldner), harder to imagine than paranoia, Simon has chocolate in the cupboard (and hasn't eaten it all), strawberries in Lisbon, having glutenous bread sold by a Coeliac. Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)

Send us a textLee and Simon talk about a moral conundrum: whether we ought to follow the wishes of the dead or that we owe more to those who remain alive.  Things covered: video calls and the future, Blake and Jerusalem, Simon dancing in Dorset, Helen Poynor, transformative art, Jefrey infected by another dog (Lola), Lee practising looking up, Simon has a moral conundrum about following the wishes of the dead or taking care of the living, giving people the option, Simon's feeling about honouring the wishes of the dead, the emotional intelligence of Lee's dad (Norman), Lee's grandad was a wheelwright, not falling out over a wheelbarrow, sentimentality, being clear or not.Get in touch with Lee and Simon at info@midlifing.net. ---The Midlifing logo is adapted from an original image by H.L.I.T: https://www.flickr.com/photos/29311691@N05/8571921679 (CC BY 2.0)