Nuke the Stars

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Aboard the majestic USS Nukelahoma, former Starcraft commentator and intrepid starship pilot Nuke mostly goofs off and talks about inconsequential, nerdy bullsh*t.

N.T. Stars


    • Jun 10, 2017 LATEST EPISODE
    • infrequent NEW EPISODES
    • 49m AVG DURATION
    • 35 EPISODES


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    Latest episodes from Nuke the Stars

    S3 - Episode 4: "Giant Cereal Person"

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 10, 2017 51:48


    The VI is back, everybody! Less importantly, this episode features Nuke and Jeannie's dream B.S., the joys of online dating in your 30s, cereal, the adventures of Appleman, ape marriage, and mantis discussion set to Beethoven's 6th. Bring this podcast into any participating Starbucks for a free trenta whatever.

    S3 - Episode 3: "Miniature Sears"

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 21, 2016 46:55


    Nuke and Jeannie once again try to analyze dreams while flying wildly off the rails. This episode includes a minute of dream analysis, Susan Saradon, Betty White, Running Into Boxes With The Stars, the return of Kermit Bane and other goofy voices. The opinions expressed by the hosts do not necessarily reflect the opinions of Sears or its affiliates.

    S3 - Episode 2: "Childhood OST"

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 21, 2016 30:31


    Finally, rain and gaming nostalgia in one neat package! A trip down memory lane features a bunch of bands covering songs from important Nintendo games of Nuke's youth while Nuke discusses boyish wonder, root beer spews and boobs.

    S3 - Episode 1: "Doofloppy"

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 24, 2016 45:25


    After senselessly demolishing time and space and crashing on an uncharted planet with abundant flora and something that sounds like fauna, Nuke fights boredom while awaiting rescue. The season premiere includes the buoyant Jeannie, dream interpretation, enough derailed conversations to provide a good foundation for a drinking game, dog attacks, social anxiety talk and Dr. Herbert West.

    S2 - Finale: "The Island of Regrets"

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 16, 2015 25:25


    Nuke tells a delirious bedtime story.

    S2 - Episode 10: "Half-Life To: The Return of the Breen"

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 12, 2015 69:58


    The three-part “Half-Life To” series is an audio playthrough of the game Half-Life 2 by Valve. The third and final installment of the series, “Half-Life To: The Return of the Breen,” is an exercise in futility... and glitches. This episode features an honest-to-god ghost army, stuck birds, watermelons, dangerous text messages, Bumbling Barney, the Perfect Strangers theme song, Robert Culp talking, and a really stupid final battle. Chapters 10-15 are tackled (Entanglement, Anticitizen One, "Follow Freeman!," Our Benefactors, Dark Energy, and Credits). Will this playthrough be completed before the computer catches on fire?

    S2 - Episode 9: "Half-Life To: The Dude Cowers"

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 10, 2015 70:21


    The three-part “Half-Life To” series is an audio playthrough of the game Half-Life 2 by Valve. The second installment of the series, "Half-Life To: The Dude Cowers," features creepy crows, creepy everything else, the worst car ever made, calming ocean breezes, the search for happiness, irritable antlions, game design disobedience, and an army led by a squeezable ball. Chapters 6-9 are tackled ("We Don't Go to Ravenholm...," Highway 17, Sandtraps, and Nova Prospekt). Will fast headcrab zombies ever be not horrifying?

    S2 - Episode 8: "Half-Life To: The Fellowship of the Crowbar"

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 7, 2015 76:43


    The three-part "Half-Life To" series is an audio playthrough of the game Half-Life 2 by Valve. The first installment of this epic journey includes creepiness, soda appreciation, a landmark moment in gaming repeated many times for no reason, boat hate, lots of pressable, clicky buttons, and playtime with Dog. Chapters 1-5 are tackled (Point Insertion, “A Red Letter Day,” Route Kanal, Water Hazard, and Black Mesa East). Will Gordon Freeman manage to fit in a shower during his quest to reach the citadel? Tune in to find out!

    S2 - Episode 7: "Farewell, Newsroom Nerdery"

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 20, 2015 35:39


    Nuke says goodbye to a nerdy, fantastic workplace with this job-centric episode. Months of secret inner turmoil revealed! An exhaustive job search explored! Buttons on action figures pressed! And at the end of it all, the (possibly) final Newsroom Nerdery segment puts a cap on an era with an embarrassing bro hug.

    S2 - Episode 6: "Gillenium"

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 23, 2014 41:43


    Music music music music music... also, music. The gentle live notes of a MIDI-controller guide the listener through the host's electronic music past and all of its triumphs and failures. This episode includes in-depth discussion about composing, the trickiness of percussion, music's polarizing effect, concertinas, the listenin' revival and magical newsroom nerdery.

    S2 - Episode 5: "Metro Tumble"

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 25, 2014 37:13


    A special director's cut thingy includes intrepid pilot Nuke recapping more than a decade of dating follies, red beards, the joys of social anxiety, a look back at The Wolf Among Us, a review of The Walking Dead Game: Season 2: Episode 4, a look back at The Wire, a look forward to historic comet fun, and a double shot of newsroom nerdery.

    S2 - Episode 4: "Wookiee Satchel"

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 13, 2014 37:41


    Things take a turn for the literary in this audio adventure tale story. Nuke spruces up the joint before discussing Stephen King books, explaining why "The Wire" is cool, and serving up a double dollop of Newsroom Nerdery that completely ruins "Game of Thrones" for everyone. This episode is brought to you by the Pizza Hut Book It! program. Not really.

    S2 - Episode 3: "Alternate Realities Out the Wazoo"

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 15, 2014 73:41


    With a shipwide sickness finally treated by competent medical staff, the show can move on to important matters - video games and why they're awesome. Games discussed in this nerdsplosion of an episode include The Walking Dead Game: Season 2, The Wolf Among Us, The Legend of Zelda: A Link Between Worlds, Zero Escape: Virtue's Last Reward, Fire Emblem: Awakening and Bravely Default. From the lengthy analyses stem a variety of sub-topics, such as evolving gaming tastes, the allure of adventure games, releasing stories in parts, comic shame, handheld voice-acting, love on a battlefield, and hero firebats. Also, newsroom nerdery. Hang on - it's going to be a doozy.

    S2 - Episode 2: "First World Survivor"

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 18, 2014 31:24


    A woe-packed Episode 2 recaps weeks of natural and man-made forces conspiring to kill the host of this podcast. How does one defeat dangerous icy snowfalls, precipitous descents, bone-chilling temperatures, and a poisoned water supply? Find out in this week's exciting episode of "Nuke vs. the Polar Vortex Aquapocalypse."

    S2 - Episode 1: "Chasing Fake Jerry"

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 22, 2013 36:41


    REBOOT! Nuke decides to honor the thousands who died unnecessarily on Mar Sara with another goofy, self-indulgent podcast episode. Topics to start out this season are a close-to-home Jerry Seinfeld show, fat comedians, classic movie dissection of The King of Comedy, The Godfather, and The Godfather: Part II, jerky heroes, and special holiday-themed newsroom nerdery.

    S1 - Finale: "Video Game Musictacular"

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 14, 2013 97:38


    To cap off a year of directionless podcasting, Nuke goes full DJ to explore the world of video game music. Hence the musictacular. Songs are discussed, game music theory is mulled, and the definition of "crying" is debated. Featured game music includes tunes from Alan Wake, Chrono Trigger, Super Mario Kart, the Deus Ex series, Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon, and Mirror's Edge, among many others.

    S1 - Episode 18: "Kermit Bane"

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 7, 2013 48:18


    Setting aside a report of infested Terran near the starport, Nuke cozies up with a Snuggie and some hot chocolate to recap a month's worth of entertainment. This episode addresses workplace changes, exercise regimens and newsroom nerdery before diving into the media roundup, which features discussion about Dexter, Breaking Bad, Garden of Words, Super Mario 3D Land, Animal Crossing: New Leaf, and Spec Ops: The Line. Also - listener mail.

    S1 - Episode 17: "The Big Ol' Space-isode"

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 31, 2013 66:24


    A guy on a spaceship talking about space. It's kismet! This robust episode broadcasts at 2.2 gigawatts to discuss International Space Station leakiness, Canadian Astronaut Chris Hadfield and his celestial mustache, Neptune's adorable new moon, Juno (the mission, not the movie), planetary sounds, a real-life Prime Directive, the Possible Alien Life Quartet, interstellar radio trolling, disagreeing with a genius, listener mail, and newsroom nerdery.

    S1 - Episode 16: "Darkly Dreaming Nukester"

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 25, 2013 31:35


    Things take a personal turn as Nuke attempts to compare himself to a serial killer and still be liked by the audience. This episode includes more ziplining adventures, Dexter, killer teddy bears, DS game indecision, and exercising nerdery.

    S1 - Minisode: "Newsroom Nerdery: A Dramatic Reading"

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 9, 2013 7:23


    A harrowing newsroom tale based on a true story.

    S1 - Episode 15: "Infinite Time Off"

    Play Episode Listen Later May 24, 2013 55:46


    With the shipwide system failure fixed, Nuke dusts off the recording equipment to recap a month's worth of events. This episode features the PC repair saga, a robust review of Bioshock Infinite, three Listener Mail letters, Jupiter memories, Radiant Historia, and newsroom nerdery with a twist.

    S1 - Episode 14: "The Magical, Whimsical World of Ghibli (Part 2)"

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 10, 2013 113:29


    The journey continues deeper into the Studio Ghibli catalogue. Special guest Mr. Work returns to help analyze the eclectic quintet of Only Yesterday, Porco Rosso, Ocean Waves, Pom Poko, and Whisper of the Heart. Ghibli's "school days" set draws vibrant discussion, thoughtful reflection, and, of course, ball jokes.

    S1 - Episode 13: "Heroine Addiction"

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 18, 2013 34:45


    It's time to feel pretty! Episode 13 explores the topic of playing as a female character in video games while trying to keep some semblance of one's masculinity intact. Rounding out the show are a chess triumph, helpful listener mail, and newsroom nerdery.

    S1 - Episode 12: "Double Downer"

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 4, 2013 42:07


    A chemical mishap without a stimpack in sight. This precautionary episode explores what not to do with sleeping pills, newsroom nerdery, the death of 1up.com, memories of a religious gaming marathon, listener mail, a bit of Dishonored, Ghost Trick and Naruto, and how some people really, really suck at chess. For example - the host.

    S1 - Episode 11: "Wonderment"

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 19, 2013 44:41


    Wow! This awestruck episode explores old cassette recordings, listener mail, brief reminiscences of Germany, Dishonored's teleporty goodness, the magic of generational leaps for games, and a little newsroom nerdery (complete with George heads!)

    S1 - Episode 10: "Hobbit Prime"

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 1, 2013 48:46


    A wormhole briefly consumes the Nukelahoma, transporting the show to times gone by. The mystical trip includes a silly opening song, Calvin and Hobbes, church memories, Naruto, the triumphant final edition of the Half-Life Game Club, and some newsroom nerdery.

    S1 - Episode 9: "Frogcast"

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 14, 2013 37:54


    It's a raspy-voiced, after-hours show this time. Awwwwwww yeah. A sickly Nuke responds to a lot of feedback (destroying an attempt at brevity), nears the alien homeworld in the Half-Life Game Club, and rattles off a tiny bit of Newsroom Nerdery before ending the "frogcast" with an appropriate clip from a different show entirely.

    S1 - Episode 8: The Birthday/Christmas/Doomsday/New Year Special

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 31, 2012 56:04


    Nuke hops a frigate back to Earth to visit family for the holidays. This episode features a Stevesmas account, some festive newsroom nerdery, an action-packed Half-Life Game Club, Jodie Foster, and an in-depth discussion (rant) about game endings. Mass Effect 3's ending brought Nuke to tears... though an infected tearduct probably had something to do with that. We may never know.

    S1 - Episode 7: "Midas River Dance"

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 18, 2012 44:39


    A dreamy, dancey, opposite-speaky episode sees lazy host Nuke talking about more feedback, recording an impossible Nintendo rave, playing the role of Tim Robbins in the Half-Life Game Club, pondering the allure of farming with Rune Factory 3, and dabbling in a little newsroom nerdery.

    S1 - Episode 6: "The Magical, Whimsical World of Ghibli (Part 1)"

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 30, 2012 109:05


    It's one humdinger of an anime show this week as special guest Mr. Work helps Nuke analyze the first five movies from the beloved Studio Ghibli - Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind, Castle in the Sky, Grave of the Fireflies, My Neighbor Totoro, and Kiki's Delivery Service. Get ready for some fun!.. and death and horror. Mostly fun, though!

    S1 - Episode 5: "Polite Zombies"

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 22, 2012 36:25


    A hastily-assembled episode 5 starts cheerfully enough with a listener suggestion, newsroom nerdery, work follies and the Half-Life Game Club. Then, the Mass Effect 3 discussion reminds us all our inevitable doom at the hands of our merciless robot overlords, or maybe not. Hopefully the latter.

    S1 - Episode 4: "This Hurts You"

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 14, 2012 33:00


    A distress beacon warning of Zerg forces on a Mar Sara moon is swiftly ignored as Nuke cozies up in his quarters for another fun recording. Episode 4 includes nightmares, newsroom nerdery, part 2 of the Half-Life Game Club, some unintended, ironic apprehension about Apprehension, and Mass Effect 3 first impressions.

    S1 - Episode 3: "Barney Exploded"

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 9, 2012 45:22


    A manic episode 3 sees stir-crazy host Nuke tackling past relationships, the first part of the Half-Life Game Club (tm), an upcoming NASA gadget, some newsroom nerdery, and the very end of Mass Effect 2. To quote Gordon Freeman: "..."

    S1 - Episode 2: "Justice for Most"

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 31, 2012 38:32


    It's a lazy snow day at the starport (on Mar Sara! I know, right??), so Nuke once again kills time by talking into a thing. Episode 2 includes check card follies, a teaser for a new segment, a discussion about leadership and morality in and outside of games, some newsroom nerdery, a surpisingly prescient Star Wars comment, and Ace Attorney: Justice for All.

    S1 - Episode 1: "The Pilot"

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 22, 2012 33:25


    With the USS Nukelahoma docked and not much to do at the starport except buy overpriced food, undecorated pilot Nuke embarks on a podcast nerdventure! Episode 1 includes Starcraft talk, video game positivity, gaming with Alan Wake, Mass Effect 2, and Ace Attorney: Justice for All, and a little newsroom nerdery.

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