Joy Gandell is a parent like you and, ever since she had her first child, has experienced the parenting stress every parent feels not knowing what to do and how to get it right. Since no guidebook was given at the birth of her 1st child, she has researched the right way to do things almost every step of the way. As time went on and her children grew and life situations became more complex, the search for answers got more frequent, and the questions deeper and seemingly more pressing. The constant pursuit for answers is a lonely place, so she created this podcast for like-minded parents who feel alone and want to join the quest to crack the parenting code. Since all children are unique, there cannot be one size fits all answers. The emphasis will be on sharing lessons learned, connections made, insights, and asking further questions. Since all parents are busy, this podcast will be seasonal, with short episodes launched weekly. You can find all transcripts and sources mentioned in the episodes at: https://beingwithjoy.buzzsprout.com/ and can reach out to Joy directly at beingwithjoypodcast@gmail.com.
In part 2 of my conversation on academics, I focus on teaching and what our teachers should actually be teaching to make a more inclusive classroom environment meeting the needs of all learners.Resources:1. Shanker Self-Reg: https://self-reg.ca/2. Learning Scientists: https://www.learningscientists.org/3. Smart But Scattered: https://www.smartbutscatteredkids.com/4. Sarah Ward: https://www.efpractice.com/
In this episode of the podcast, I go through what I feel is wrong with our education system and suggest things we can do to fix the problems.Resources:1. Sir Ken Robinson Ted Talk 1: https://youtu.be/iG9CE55wbtY2. Sir Ken Robinson Ted Talk 2: https://youtu.be/wX78iKhInsc3. Sir Ken Robinson Ted Talk 3: https://youtu.be/kFMZrEABdw44. Rick Lavoie: https://youtu.be/Q3UNdbxk3xs
Attention: changes to the podcast are here. Listen in to hear what's changing going forward.
Welcome back to season 2! This episode is dedicated to all my listeners as I answer the six questions that were sent to me during and after the end of season 1.Resources:1. Shanker Self-Reg: https://self-reg.ca/2. Dr. Ned Hallowell: https://drhallowell.com/3. Lynn Lyons: https://www.lynnlyons.com/4. List of free resources on my website: Joy Gandell, SETA Coaching & Training: www.setacoaching.com (live at the end of August)
Welcome to season 2 of the Being With Joy: A Quest To Crack The Parenting Code. I am so happy to be continuing this quest with you!
There are so many subjects we need to discuss with our kids in order to keep them safe, healthy, and positive contributing members of society. In this episode, I talk about those various subjects and how I approach them with my kids.Resources:1. What's Going On Down There: A Boy's Guide To Growing Up, by Karen Gravelle, Bloomsbury USA Children's, 2017.2. Lyons, L. (Host). (2021, March 12). Lynn Lyons with Robin Hutson on Families & The Power Of Listening. [Audio podcast episode]. In Fluster Clux. Luxe Recess L.L.C. https://luxerecess.com/flusterclux/families-the-power-of-listening/3. Lyons, L. (Host). (2021, March 26). Lynn Lyons with Robin Hutson on When Your Teen's Friends Are In Crisis: A Guide To Building Healthy Boundaries. [Audio podcast episode]. In Fluster Clux. Luxe Recess L.L.C. https://luxerecess.com/flusterclux/building-healthy-boundaries/4. Lyons, L. (Host). (2021, March 5). Lynn Lyons with Robin Hutson on The Bad Advice That Makes Anxiety Worse. [Audio podcast episode]. In Fluster Clux. Luxe Recess L.L.C. https://luxerecess.com/flusterclux/anxiety-advice/
Parenting is hard, parenting when you feel pressure from other parents is even harder. Today, I explore how I've been influenced by parenting peer pressure and comparison and how it makes parenting decisions even harder.Resources:1. Jenks, Andrew. (Host). (2019, April 18). In Gangster Capitalism Season 1 The College Admissions Scandal. Cadence13. https://shows.cadence13.com/podcast/gangster-capitalism/season/1
For most of us, we are unable to parent on our own, the other parent is also involved in decision making. I cannot talk about my parenting journey without addressing the fact that I do not parent alone. What does that look like for me? Listen to this week's episode and find out.Resources:1. Brown, B. (Host). (2020, March 31). David Kessler and Brené on Grief and Finding Meaning. [Audio podcast episode]. In Unlocking Us with Brené Brown. Cadence13. https://brenebrown.com/podcast/david-kessler-and-brene-on-grief-and-finding-meaning/2. Brown, B. (Host). (2021, February 3). Brené with Drs. John and Julie Gottman on What Makes Love Last. [Audio podcast episode]. In Unlocking Us with Brené Brown. Cadence 13 https://brenebrown.com/podcast/brene-with-drs-john-and-julie-gottman-on-what-makes-love-last/3. Lyons, L. (Host). (2021, February 12). Lynn Lyons with Robin Hutson on Romance & Resentment: Co-Parenting Tips You Need Now. [Audio podcast episode]. In Fluster Clux. Luxe Recess L.L.C. https://luxerecess.com/flusterclux/co-parenting-tips/
After I finished uploading the Sink or Swim episode, I was left feeling as though I was missing something. Last week I realized what I was missing in that episode and decided to dedicate this week to talk about how we teach our kids because coaching is not the only parenting tool we require.Resources:1. GROW Model, Sir John Whitmore: https://youtu.be/L81EA8XTJvo2. EDGE Method: Boy Scouts of America, scouting.org, Outdoor Ethics Guide: Teaching EDGE Method: https://www.scouting.org/wp-content/uploads/2019/01/Teaching-Edge-Method.pdf
As I reflect on the conversations I have with parents who reach out to me I see similar themes emerging, especially when those parents have children with complex medical and/or mental health challenges. In this week's episode, I talk about those themes and how I have found myself able to overcome these parenting challenges.Resources:1. Brown, B. (Host). (2020, March 31). David Kessler and Brené on Grief and Finding Meaning. [Audio podcast episode]. In Unlocking Us with Brené Brown. Cadence13. https://brenebrown.com/podcast/david-kessler-and-brene-on-grief-and-finding-meaning/2. Kessler, David. Finding Meaning: The Sixth Stage of Grief. Scribner, 2020.3. Brown, B. (Host). (2020, March 23). Tarana Burke and Brené on Being Heard and Seen. [Audio podcast episode]. In Unlocking Us with Brené Brown. Cadence13. https://brenebrown.com/podcast/brene-tarana-burke-on-empathy/4. Brown, B. (Host). (2020, March 27). Brené on Comparative Suffering, the 50/50 Myth, and Settling the Ball. [Audio podcast episode]. In Unlocking Us with Brené Brown. Cadence13. https://brenebrown.com/podcast/brene-on-comparative-suffering-the-50-50-myth-and-settling-the-ball/
This week I talk about why I feel it is important for parents to possess a growth mindset. It is not only important for children to possess, but it's also important for parents!Resources:1. Brown, B. (Host). (2021). [Audio podcast episode]. In Unlocking Us with Brené Brown. Parcast Network. 2. Lyons, L. (Host). (2021). [Audio podcast episode]. In Fluster Clux. Luxe Recess, LLC.3. Kids Are Worth It: Raising Resilient, Responsible, Compassionate Kids, by Barbara Coloroso. Penguin Canada, 2010.4. The Learning Scientists, learningscientists.org.
Lately, I've been speaking with parents about the messages they are sending their kids when they speak with them. So, for today's episode, I address this issue.Resources:1. Shanker Self-Reg: Self-Reg by Dr. Stuart Shanker, Penguin Canada, 2017.2. Sir Ken Robinson TED Talk: https://youtu.be/iG9CE55wbtY
Helicopter parenting gets such bad press, so it seems sink or swim would be the way to go. In today's episode, I explore the options parents have between helicopter parenting and letting our kids sink or swim. Perhaps there is another option? Listen to find out?Resources:1. Barbara Coloroso, Kids Are Worth It: Raising Resilient, Responsible, Compassionate Kids, Penguin Canada (1st Edition), 2010.2. The Learning Scientists: learningscientists.org3. GROW Model and coaching for parents: Sir John Whitmore, YouTube video: https://youtu.be/L81EA8XTJvo
In this episode I talk about how I have learned that it is impossible for me to parent my children equally, I have to parent them equitably by giving them what each of them needs. Even when each thinks I am not parenting fairly.
This week I talk about how important it is for us as parents to be more emotionally literate and how it will impact ourselves and our parenting.Resources: 1. The Unopened Gift: A Primer In Emotional Literacy, by Dan Newby & Lucy Nunez, Daniel Newby, 2017.2. Self-Reg, by Dr. Stuart Shanker, Penguin Canada, 20173. Brown, B. (Host). (2020, April 14). Dr. Marc Brackett and Brené on “Permission to Feel.” [Audio podcast episode]. In Unlocking Us with Brené Brown. Cadence13. https://brenebrown.com/podcast/dr-marc-brackett-and-brene-on-permission-to-feel/4. Dr. Lori Santos, (2020) "Don't Think of a White Bear." [Audio Podcast Episode]. In The Happiness Lab, Pushkin Industries.5. Dr. Lori Santos (2020) "Make 'Em Laugh." [Audio Podcast Episode]. In The Happiness Lab, Pushkin Industries.6. Lynn Lyons (2020) In Flusterclux Podcast, Luxe Recess, LLC.
In this episode, I talk about Shanker Self-Reg and how it has helped me for myself and as a parent. Listen in to hear all about this amazing lifelong process that changes the way we see behaviour.Resources:1. Self-Reg by Dr. Stuart Shanker: amazon.ca/Self-Reg-Child-Stress-Successfully-Engage/dp/0143191578/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1NNN5RMYLYZRZ&dchild=1&keywords=self-reg+stuart+shanker&qid=1614380811&sprefix=self-reg+%2Caps%2C296&sr=8-12. The Mehrit Centre: self-reg.ca/resource-library/
This episode is the lead up to the Self-Reg episode. It is important to talk about the Limbic System when we talk about wanting to understand our and our children's behaviour. I've heard so many people talking about the Limbic System influencing our behaviours that it became necessary to address here.Episode Resources:1. Khan Academy: Emotions: Limbic System: https://youtu.be/GDlDirzOSI82. Emotions & The Brain: https://youtu.be/xNY0AAUtH3g3. Triune Brain: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Triune_brain4. Triune Brain: https://youtu.be/G3VENQk5CSk5. Brene Brown, Unlocking Us Podcast: https://brenebrown.com/podcast/brene-on-shame-and-accountability/6. Brene Brown, Unlocking Us Podcast: https://brenebrown.com/podcast/brene-with-emily-and-amelia-nagoski-on-burnout-and-how-to-complete-the-stress-cycle/7. Lynn Lyons: https://www.lynnlyons.com/books-videos/8. Self-Reg: https://self-reg.ca/resource-library/
In this episode, I talk about how we as parents struggle to hold two competing ideas at one time when it comes to the ideas/truths being about our children.Resources:1. Brene Brown, Unlocking Us Podcast: https://brenebrown.com/transcript/tarana-burke-and-brene-on-being-heard-and-seen/
In this episode, I discuss my relationship with self-care and how it has evolved over time through different life experiences. Resources:1. Today's Parent Article: https://www.todaysparent.com/blogs/opinion/self-care-is-a-bunch-of-bs/?utm_medium=Social&utm_source=Facebook&fbclid=IwAR3z2q_v2uMJ5AmN6exWtbSXc_d-OjPpgoM-YZzuTdqRm4Q8E2JqYr91Trw#Echobox=16086676032. Unlocking Us by Brene Brown: https://brenebrown.com/podcast/brene-with-emily-and-amelia-nagoski-on-burnout-and-how-to-complete-the-stress-cycle/3. Unlocking Us by Brene Brown: https://brenebrown.com/podcast/brene-on-the-queens-gambit-revisiting-ffts-and-resting-our-tired-brains/4. The Happiness Lab with Dr. Laurie Santos: https://www.happinesslab.fm/coronavirus-bonus-episodes/episode-4-calm-can-be-contagious5. The Happiness Lab with Dr. Laurie Santos: https://www.happinesslab.fm/coronavirus-bonus-episodes/episode-10-good-screens-and-bad-screens6. The Happiness Lab with Dr. Laurie Santos: https://www.happinesslab.fm/2020-mini-season-episodes/sleep-right7. Dr. John Ratey: https://www.amazon.ca/Spark-Revolutionary-Science-Exercise-Brain/dp/0316113514/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=dr.+john+ratey&qid=1612450040&sr=8-18. Dr. Richard Brown, Breathing: https://youtu.be/CngH49c4zgo9. Dr. Richard Brown, Breathing: https://youtu.be/PwvGdYjrF3810. Dr. Richard Brown, Breathing: https://youtu.be/KCvOHlNsr5c11. Dr. Richard Brown, Breathing: https://youtu.be/ZyPHWARoa1A12. Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT, Tapping): https://youtu.be/pAclBdj20ZU13. Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT, Tapping): https://youtu.be/Tj_qSyfP2lQ
While I know I have made parenting mistakes over the years, I have dedicated this episode to talk about all the things I know I have done right. Resources:1. Brene Brown Podcast - Unlocking Us (Book: Burnout): https://brenebrown.com/podcast/brene-with-emily-and-amelia-nagoski-on-burnout-and-how-to-complete-the-stress-cycle/2. Barbara Coloroso Book: https://www.amazon.ca/Kids-Are-Worth-Responsible-Compassionate/dp/0143175432/ref=sr_1_1?crid=2WUFTIF750SGD&dchild=1&keywords=barbara+coloroso&qid=1611446203&s=books&sprefix=Barbara+C%2Caps%2C592&sr=1-13. Brene Brown Podcast - Unlocking Us (Apologies): https://brenebrown.com/podcast/harriet-lerner-and-brene-im-sorry-how-to-apologize-why-it-matters/
This podcast episode explores the loneliness we sometimes feel as parents who are challenged with parenting struggles and what we have to do to overcome this loneliness.Episode Resources:1. Brene Brown Unlocking Us Podcast with Vivek Murthy: https://brenebrown.com/podcast/dr-vivek-murthy-and-brene-on-loneliness-and-connection/2. Vivek Murthy Book: https://www.amazon.ca/Together-Connection-Performance-Greater-Happiness/dp/0062913298/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=vivek+murthy&qid=1610937726&sr=8-13. The Happiness Lab Podcast Episode 4: Mistakenly Seeking Solitude: https://www.happinesslab.fm/season-1-episodes/mistakenly-seeking-solitude
In this episode, I talk about the questions that guide my curiosity which helps me find it within myself to move forward.Episode Resources:1. Shanker Self-Reg: self-reg.ca2. Change Your Questions, Change Your Life: https://www.amazon.ca/Change-Your-Questions-Life-Leadership/dp/162656633X/ref=sr_1_1?crid=OCAFQ0OTVH88&dchild=1&keywords=change+your+questions+change+your+life&qid=1610298529&sprefix=change+your+questions%2Caps%2C175&sr=8-1
I talk about how I've learned to find it within myself to make things happen versus waiting for others to lead me to answers and solutions.
I introduce myself, explain who I am and why I started this podcast. I look forward to your joining me on the quest.
For my first podcast episode, I share my story so that you can feel a part of this parenting quest and understand where I have come from, where I am today and where I am going tomorrow.Looking forward to having company on this quest.Sources:1. Sleep Bible: https://www.amazon.ca/Sleeping-Through-Night-Revised-Toddlers/dp/0060742569/ref=sr_1_1?crid=3AP9J4JEVUN4Q&dchild=1&keywords=sleeping+through+the+night&qid=1608742601&sprefix=sleeping+through+%2Caps%2C157&sr=8-12. Barbara Coloroso: https://www.amazon.ca/Kids-Are-Worth-Responsible-Compassionate/dp/0143175432/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=Kids+are+worth+it&qid=1608742671&sr=8-13. Shanker Self-Reg: https://www.amazon.ca/Self-Reg-Child-Stress-Successfully-Engage/dp/0143191578/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=Self-Reg&qid=1608742934&sr=8-14. Lynn Lyons: https://www.lynnlyons.com/
I talk about how my path to parenting better started with self-exploration, discovery, and personal changes.Episode sources:1. Gangster Capitalism Podcast Season 1: https://shows.cadence13.com/podcast/gangster-capitalism/season/12. Barbara Coloroso: https://www.amazon.ca/Kids-Are-Worth-Responsible-Compassionate/dp/0143175432/ref=sr_1_1?crid=YUZRTYIO7ZFR&dchild=1&keywords=kids+are+worth+it+barbara+coloroso&qid=1608743819&sprefix=Kids+are+worth+it%2Caps%2C174&sr=8-13. Lynn Lyons: https://www.amazon.ca/Anxious-Kids-Parents-Courageous-Independent/dp/0757317626/ref=sr_1_1?crid=6QJ1MP1ZI5EZ&dchild=1&keywords=anxious+parents+anxious+kids&qid=1608743878&sprefix=Anxious+parents%2Caps%2C159&sr=8-14. Shanker Self-Reg: https://www.amazon.ca/Self-Reg-Child-Stress-Successfully-Engage/dp/0143191578/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=Self-Reg&qid=1608743919&sr=8-15. Unlocking Us Podcast: https://brenebrown.com/podcasts/6. Heart Talk: https://www.amazon.ca/Heart-Talk-Poetic-Wisdom-Better/dp/1501177346/ref=sr_1_1?crid=EKDKR13OZTEV&dchild=1&keywords=heart+talk+cleo+wade&qid=1608743991&sprefix=heart+talk%2Caps%2C177&sr=8-1
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