The Angi Taylor Show

 Today on ROCK 95.5FM, Michael and Marris are back with some hilarious and quirky moments.Michael, the sunrise enthusiast, shares his obsession with early mornings, while Marris, always the people-watcher, reveals his latest fascination: staring at the Garbage Man and his truck—because why not?The guys also talk food, with Arbys' new Fried Turkey Gobbler sandwich proving they're still living up to their slogan of "having the meats."Michael recounts a bizarre discovery from this morning involving a "special gift" left by his dog right between his toes—yeah, you'll have to hear it to believe it.Plus, in some exciting local news, a resident from Elmhurst has just won a cool $1 million—how's that for a lucky break?  For tech fans, Marris is back with Tech Today, revealing the buzzworthy new video game console set to hit the market in March 2025. Spoiler: It's going to be huge.

In this episode, Marris and Michael dive into a wild week of sports, tech detox, and Election Day surprises.First, they break down the shocking moment when D.J. Moore of the Chicago Bears walked off the field — what really went down, and what it means for the team.Then, Michael shares his experience of going completely offline for 24 hours with no cellphone, and the unexpected lessons he learned along the way.Plus, they explore the best (and weirdest) Election Day freebies — because who doesn't love free stuff, right?Tune in for laughs, insights, and a mix of current events that'll keep you hooked!

It's Chainsaw Friday on The Angi Taylor Show! In today's episode, we dive into high-stakes drama as we hear from a "Roadie" who suspects her fiancé might be cheating—will Angi and the team offer the help she needs? Plus, things heat up with our hit game Don't Kill Angi, where listeners take a chance to help Angi survive wild situations! And we can't forget Marris, who gets caught in a social media slip-up for following a woman named Jelly Beanzz on Instagram. 

On today's wild ride, we tackle the latest viral moment with Aaron Rodgers—"Booger Gate." Did he really do that on the sidelines? We also dive into a jaw-dropping stat: Chicago ranks in the top 5 for most expensive beer at sporting events. Are you ready to break the bank for a brew at the game? Plus, it's all about the SHAME today. What do people shame you for? We opened up the phone lines and got some crazy stories. And of course, don't miss our epic Sonic Temple Festival ticket giveaway during everyone's favorite segment, "Don't Kill Angi!" Tune in for all the madness and fun!

In this episode of The Angi Taylor Show, we dive into some wild topics! Ever wonder how far you'd go to retrieve your dropped phone? Whether it's a port-a-potty or off the side of a cliff, we've got a story  that will make you think twice before letting your phone slip. Plus, a pro basketball player's hot take on banning reporters from locker rooms sparks debate—should they really be allowed in when players are in their most vulnerable moments? And finally, we tackle the burning question: Do ugly people have a hidden advantage in life? 

On today's episode of The Angi Taylor Show, things got spicy as the team tackled the question: Would you let your husband or wife sleep with someone else for a million dollars? With the cost of living soaring higher than ever, it's a wild hypothetical that got everyone talking! Plus, we had an epic Request Wars battle with the theme “Best Bassline in a Song,” featuring some killer tracks, and of course, everyone's favorite game Don't Kill Angi brought the laughs.

It's Chainsaw Friday! One lucky listener walks away with a brand-new chainsaw to kick off their weekend in style. We also dive into a cringe-worthy story about a painful fall off a fence, Ouch! And just when you thought things couldn't get crazier, we break the news about former Chicago Bears QB Jay Cutler getting arrested for a DUI and a gun charge in Tennessee. 

Join us as we explore life's biggest questions with a blend of curiosity and humor. From asking, "Is heaven real?" to diving into the legend of "3-Dong Darrell", nothing is off-limits. We'll also tackle the age-old debate: What hill would you die on?

On today's episode of The Angi Taylor Show, we dive into the chaos surrounding the coveted Stanley Cup Wicked Edition, as shoppers are going wild in stores like Target, fighting to resell them at crazy prices. Plus, we discuss the bizarre story of a Chinese aquarium that's under fire for trying to pass off a mechanical shark as the real deal! And in our listener-favorite segment, we ask: ‘What did you steal from work?' You won't believe some of these stories!

Angi is back, and she's fresh off an epic weekend at an exclusive Motley Crüe concert in LA! Hear all the wild details from her adventure. Meanwhile, Michael had a "close call" where he thought he might get shot—what happened?! And Marris dives into his latest obsession, a surprisingly delicious COOKIE SALAD! Tune in for laughs, chaos, and everything in between on The Angi Taylor Show.

In this wild edition of Chainsaw Friday, Angi kicks things off with a hilariously unfiltered confession: she had a shart! (Yep, it happened.) Then, things heat up with our Rodie Round Table as we dive into a roommate showdown over hot water drama—who's taking all the hot showers? Plus, Crocs just dropped...for dogs?! We can't help but weigh in on this strange but adorable trend.Of course, it wouldn't be Chainsaw Friday without a killer Request Wars segment—this time featuring the Best Guitar Solos that'll melt your face off! Oh, and brace yourselves, Minnesota Barb makes a surprise appearance to dish out her unique "words of wisdom."You don't want to miss it—it's chaotic, hilarious, and packed with everything you love about The Angi Taylor Show!

Get ready for a wild ride in this episode as we dive into the hottest Halloween costumes of the year—whether you're dressing to impress or just trying to survive the spooky season! Plus, we'll share a jaw-dropping story about a lady who took her love for raccoons to the next level (trust us, it's crazy). And to top it all off, we're discussing the songs you'd want playing on your deathbed.

Drinking and atheletics? ? ?SIGN US UP ! ! !

Oh gosh... Watch the roads!!!

MARRIS IS BACK!Lets gooooo!Thank you for listening! 

You mean to tell me if I ram my shopping cart into someone else's at the grocery store I'll get laid? Nice. 

Whether you're sprinting or doing a marathon, you better cuddle Angi after. 

Who sent Angi a box of dead fish? We have no clue, but the gang will be at Region Ale Tap House & Eatery in Schereville, IN from 4pm-6pm TODAY (9/13/24)! 

The Screaming Goat Fairy might have some competition ...

Listen, marriage is hard and people are complex. Dogs, however, are better.

NFL Football is Back! Adulting is Hard, pulling out is even worse.  

Angi is unsure of her Fantasy FootBall Team, this Japanese company help you quit your Job, and Marris' Plans for Tanzania.

The Angi Taylor Morning Show talks to Orange Cassidy about all things AEW Collision. 

Gatorwine? What the...?Thank you for listening!

Oh no, we cannot do this again....Thank you for listening!

Do you have kids???Are they naughty??Well we have the topic for you!

It's monday! Let's goooo!

ChainsawsBardWhat more could you ask for? Thank you for listening

The Team gets confused on Gen AlphaMichael gets creamed in Request WarsAngi keeps on booping everything

Hump Day is here and that kind of makes sense why Angi found herself confused by the context of "Summerween," which is indeed celebrating the spooky season during the summer and not fresh dongs baking in the sun as Angi had assumed. However, men being on the brain makes sense because our Daily Discussion Topic this morning found us passing the mic to the ladies after an incident during the Jamaican wedding. That's right, middle of the week and we're finally getting to something wild that happened at the overcooked wedding. As 50 or so people baked outside, the lovely couple stood at the altar with their local Jamaican man officiant. The issue arose when the vows were exchanged and the officiant turned to the groom and said "but you own her now." The collective look and mental daggers each of the women shared could probably turn into some kind of reel because a statement like that in 2024 is prime cancellation material. However, Angi was sure all the men were absolutely thrilled at the idea of a woman being their property and so she turned the floor to the ladies to tell us what they would make their man do if they could. I feel like this would also be the proper place to add that after hearing this, Jay the Straight turned to Angi and said "let's renew our vows in Jamaica so I own you." Yeah, we're turning this into Man Hate Wednesday so let's just get into the CVS receipt of issues Angi brought along with her. First up, Jay the Straight must take a cuddle class since he is not a cuddler (I feel like a cuddle class isn't going to make him want to cuddle more but I'm a man so I think my thought is invalid here.) Now Angi loves to cuddle and be the little spoon but Jay the Straight is very herky, jerky and twitchy. To be fair, he does have restless leg syndrome and we've heard about him kicking her but she wants that to cease along with complaining that his arms are dying when he's forced to hold her. Seeing as this show is only four hours, we made room for just one more complaint/fix which was that he stops leaving his half empty water bottles all around Floptopia. Since we are equal opportunists here, Marris went next to say a ton of his ex's felt he should take dance classes since he has three left feet (and you know what they say about that, three legs ... giggity.) Mike thinks that his wife would want him to ditch the phone sometimes seeing as he practically lives on it. Right, we've collected the studio crew's thoughts so let's head to the Request Line. Out the gate we had Joe, whose video game playing makes his woman nuts and led him to proclaim that women hate it when men are happy (he's not wrong.) Katie wanted men to experience cramps and the suffering that comes with being on your period as the amount of times to be told to "just smile." After complaining about being fat, bloated, moody and crappy and told how if a stranger tells her to "just smile," Angi basically explained how to drive her to kill. Pamela would want to keep her man from procrastinating because that tends to take six months and if she resolves the issue without him, he gets mad. Lunchbox wants to grow for his wife seeing as his father died two months ago and he is having a hard time. Lastly, Dominick would change working too much as he is a traffic controller and does 70 to 90 hours a week. If you are looking for more roadie thoughts or have your own, hit up our Facebook group (Angi Taylor Show) and drop us a comment.

Well, today was supposed to be a lovely day with beautiful weather and the fact that we are one step closer to another weekend. However, Angi decided to upend all of this by getting real disgusting by opening her mouth and unleashing a truly gross Daily Discussion Topic. For reasons I have yet to understand, we decided to look at the most disgusting things people have put in their mouths. Now, I know your mind went right into the gutter but we were skipping the obvious dirty answers and looked more toward edible and inedible objects. For example, remember when parents used to stuff soap in their kids mouths when they sounded like the studio does when we're off air. Mike understood that all too well as he once got the soap as a kid as did one of the survey respondents who was drunk and thought a soap sample outside a store was food. Other offered options included chewing on an Advil liquid gel cap, having a seagull poop into their mouth, accidentally drinking windshield wiper fluid as a kid and having a cockroach fall into their mouth when they were drinking out of the bathroom faucet. It gets worse still though, like the cat who sneezed into its owners mouth when they yawned, a sleepwalker eating half a bowl of potpourri thinking it was cereal and let's never forget the horror that is Chinese century eggs. If you don't know what that is Google it but don't blame me if you do. Disgusted yet? I sure am and it only keeps getting worse as we got the studio examples. Angi was at a party in high school and she drank out of a beer bottle that she thought was hers but turned out to be one filled with chew spit. Before we got to Marris' actual example, there was food mentioned in coconut sparkling water and durian fruit which he could actually attest to as not being so bad. He said that durian actually tastes decent if you can get past the smell. As for his example though, he once had a baby puke in his mouth which is just lovely. As for Mike, when he was a kid, he ate dog poop which clearly means his spirit animal is Divine. Adding in my own, I once licked an orange push pop straight from the freezer and it was fuzzy. Now, if your stomach is still intact, let's move to the Request Line to see if we can make your breakfast/lunch/dinner come racing up. Rob thought he saw a Whopper on the ground of his house when he was a kid but when he popped it in his mouth, it turned out to be a tick that had come off the dog. (I lost it over that one, I'll never be the same again.) Head Roadie Bob saved his choking daughter and got a mouth full of iron supplement for it. Tony drank a Coke with a bee in it and it ended up stinging his tongue. Weirdly enough, Mike also had that happen to him. Angi took a moment then to readdress her fear of bees because she has never been stung by one and just assumes it would make her blow up and die if she was. Ashley had a nose picker kid who shoved a finger full into her mouth. Katie is a medical assistant and while swabbing a kids throat, ended up getting a mouth full of wet cough. Lastly, Head Roadie Tom had his son spray pee into his mouth when he was changing him as a baby. If you are looking for more roadie thoughts or have your own, hit up our Facebook group (Angi Taylor Show) and drop us a comment.

Even though we are well rested and Angi survived her almost chance encounter with a hurricane completely unscathed, for whatever reason we were in a mood this morning. That's right, it's Monday morning and we are looking to get mad so the Daily Discussion Topic tackled a current online challenge created to get you furious. Without using politics as a jump point, start a fight in five words or less. There were plenty of examples to work with in case you are looking to cause strife in your workplace or homestead today. "Pineapple on pizza is awesome!" (I know people who would throw hands over that) "Mayo is trash." "Coffee is nasty." "Wine is better with ice." (Wanna see Angi take off her hoops, tell her that) "Dogs are better than cats." (I see nothing wrong with that one) "Star Wars is boring." (Walt would like a word with you) "Game of Thrones is stupid." "Goodfellas is mid." "Shawshank Redemption is overrated." "Brad Pitt was never hot." (Angi just got out the brass knuckles) "Will Ferrell is not funny." "PC's are better than Macs." (Marris agrees on this) "Nobody cares about hockey." "The Beatles are overrated." "Nirvana wasn't that good." "Breakdancing isn't a sport." The biggest one ever, which especially involves women, is telling them to "calm down." For the record, if you ever tell Angi to "calm down," she will literally explode (I know from personal experience.) As for the crew Michael said "Lebron is better than Jordan." Angi's pick was "ketchup on hotdogs is awesome." Marris decided to use this to make Angi mad with "Jordan's are overhyped" and because she was wearing some today, she almost killed him. In response, Angi told Marris "soccer sucks, especially Arsenal." With the studio crew completely enraged, Angi took to the Request Line to cause more festering anger to boil over. Mary's offering was "Taylor Swift, greatest singer ever!" Angi, noted hater of all things Taylor, offered that she got out of Top 40 before her second resurgence and she would have quit had she not. Tammy picked "ketchup on steak" because she does it and enjoys it which made the studio crew furious. Eric hit it out of the park telling Angi "you're just like your mother." Oddly enough, he would have no issue being compared to his dad but she was big mad about being compared to mom. Sarah said "The Avengers aren't cool" which led to a rabbit hole of Thor, "Lady Spiderwoman" aka Madame Web and The Thing. Brandon suggested "Sox are better than Cubs." Alan brought in "NASCAR isn't a real sport." We capped with Matt saying "You got some ugly babies." If you are looking for more roadie thoughts or have your own, hit up our Facebook group (Angi Taylor Show) and drop us a comment.

We've made it to hump day and for some of us, that just means the week is half over. However, for Angi that means she is one day closer to her possible doom (I know, I say this every week but this time it may actually happen.) See, she is headed for a destination wedding in Jamaica tomorrow (which you can read more about in the rest of the notes) and so our show was very wedding centric this morning. The Daily Discussion Topic for example, tackled a couple who don't want to have a booze filled wedding (why even go?) because they don't drink. For this reason they aren't keen on an open bar and though they don't care if others drink, they don't want to pay for it. Apparently, somewhere along the lines cash bar got lost and Angi immediately put her foot down saying not to invite her if there is no bar. To be fair though, if they had an open bar with her there, well.... Anyway, the point that was trying to be made here is that if you are having a 6 hour party and there is no liquid courage to enhance the funtivities, people are not going to have fun dancing (and will more than likely sneak in flasks.) The point is to cater to the needs of your guests who are there to celebrate you but at the same time, they want to let loose and have fun. Now, that isn't to say that there are some rules that are fine including no kids, which Angi enforced at hers. This was because relatives were coming in from out of state and she wanted them to enjoy Chicago without being bogged down by brats. Of course, enforcement of this could only go so far as people insisted they bring their demon spawns and some of them even came for poor suffering Jay the Straight telling him his mother would have been disgusted by the imposed rule. That wasn't the only drama as there was also that thing with the guy selling cocaine and an uncle that got so drunk he was carried out and then came back for more an hour later. As for myself, I'm a wedding menace and have stories about my pants falling off, falling drunkenly into the DJ booth, peeing in an unused hall of a venue, a car accident and so much other nonsense that there isn't room here for. All of this nonsense had us asking the roadies what went down at either their weddings or ones they attended. Up first on the Request Line was Sarah who saw the best man propose to his girlfriend in the middle of the best man speech and then get thrown out by the pissed off groom. Jim's mother in law showed up which was enough to wreck things plenty but then she swapped out booze on the table for coffee services. Carter had a stranger throw beer labels at him and it made him want to resort to violence but our roadies are stand up citizens so he held back but he was pissed. Amy's ex husband was at a wedding with her and while she was in the bathroom, he requested their wedding song to the DJ. When she came out, he dragged her to the dance floor for an awkward dance. Mark made a best man speech saying he heard it should be as long as the groom is making love to his wife for the first time and then ended it a second later. If you are looking for more roadie thoughts or have your own, hit up our Facebook group (Angi Taylor Show) and drop us a comment.

Welcome to the brightest show this side of Times Square (not brains obviously, I'm talking about lighting.) That's right, we are coming right out the gate with a take so hot, you'd think it was going to live forever (a little teaser for the other part of these notes.) So Michael earned his first taste of Angi insanity when he suggested that the world needs a new Mr. Rogers and of course, this upset our unhinged hostess greatly. After all, there is a place in the world for these great souls like Mr. Rogers and Bob Ross (shout out to his up and coming replacement, Yazan Spice.) Anyway, Angi sighed because she grew up in a world of trust no one and more so, do not trust them if they seem too wholesome for this world. Buckle up kids, we're entering slander territory for her and libel for me for writing out her deranged word vomiting. You see, she feels as though there is something innately sinister about that deceased good guy next door Mr. Rogers. After all, who in their right mind as a parent would let their kids go hang out next door with a single man who has a bunch of puppets in his house (don't worry, trolley gets it too.) That one kid who was always there feeding the fish, what was Mr. Rogers fed him afterwards! Marris, one of the two people in the studio who knew that this was a TV show and not real life (as I'm assuming Angi assumed,) said that nothing happened. Well, Angi was not buying that and she continued down the path of slanderation. We weighed how he had a long career and nothing was said but Angi said it was more about not besmirching his name (which makes know sense because everyone loves to cancel others.) Angi directed her point then to saying intern HP knows if someone is bad and even though Marris explained that nothing has ever been said about Fred Rogers, Angi pulled out her next unhinged point. It is not okay to send kids next door to play with a single man's fish, puppets and train which I'm assuming were all supposed to be euphemisms. As she pointed out, he was trying to pull a choo choo train on you. This then transitioned to coming for the mailman and Mr. Rogers "allegedly" (I'm not going down for this one Angi) having a van with a Playstation and candy in it. She made a point saying that whenever someone is too good to be true, there's always a scandal attached to it like how Mr. Beast is currently going down or remember how Mother Teresa would beat those girls. The moment that sweater went on and those kids came over, his pants grew three sizes that day. As Marris explained how all scandal ridden children come to light like those Barney brats and the Nickelodeon kids who got their toes sucked by that disgusting pig showrunner. No one has come out against Mr. Rogers but Angi explained they are all secretly in a group with the Michael Jackson kids and they're all trying to just protect his legacy. We ended this non-stop train of getting us plenty of mad people and phone calls from estates by having Angi go after Bozo as well even though she had to be reminded that his name was not "that scary ass clown." In fact, she doesn't trust any adults in a costume that entertains kids (and this is after she got felt up by Southpaw on Friday and plotted a threesome with Benny the Bull and Tommy Hawk.)

Well, that was certainly a wild weekend and after everything that went down, I hope you're a bit sober because there is a lot to unpack today. FYI, I'm not sober but that's beyond the point, let's get into this steaming pile. So Angi was at the show event at Cork & Kerry on Friday when Southpaw came in and tried to knock Tommy Hawk out of her DM's and then she went to a Top 5 of All Time Metallica show (when pressed what was knocked out of her top 5, she didn't know because she barely knows what planet she's on most days.) This was followed by a trip to Serb Fest which got her thinking about culture and created a Daily Discussion Topic for us. Angi sought to hear about funny or weird things from people's cultures so we started with hers. Promaja, which is a superstition about leaving two windows open at the same time and them causing a health risk while also allowing for the devil to come in. However, if you tuck your shirt into your pants, it keeps the devil from being able to get to your kidneys. Right, so her people are nuts, let's get to something more grounded in reality from Marris. He explained to us why smoke alarms are always chirping in black peoples houses. Aside from the fact that they never get changed, it has to do with different ones going off at separate times and not knowing which is the one that is going bad so they all just get ignored. In fact, he has vivid memories of being at his grandma's house and playing in the basement while that familiar chirp was going. I also have vivid memories but they mostly come from playing video games online. Anig and Michael both explained that this is a no go in their respective houses because it makes their dogs go nuts. Speaking of Michael, his contribution as a Brit is how much they love to use the "c" word. I personally think I must have been British in a past life because that is my favorite word and I use it to pepper pretty much all of my sentences off air. As for his white American side, he offered the love of Ed Hardy and unseasoned white chicken. I'd offer up mine but I don't know anything interesting about being Lithuanian, Polish and Greek so let's just go right to the Request Line. Kristen is Armenian as they have the evil eye. This is used to ward off bad stuff but if you happen to not be wearing yours, her 98 year old grandmother will pinch your butt which also works as protection it seems. Erin was married to a Serb for 16 years and learned that sitting on concrete causes hemorrhoids and eating popsicles in the winter will give you a sore throat. Chris is Scottish and told us how the unicorn is the national animal of Scotland. He assumed they picked it because they drank too much. Jeff called into discuss how Polack's are cheap and always trying to save money. Eric is Sicillian and he has to get out of bed right foot first or else! If you are looking for more roadie thoughts or have your own, hit up our Facebook group (Angi Taylor Show) and drop us a comment.

Well, today has been an absolutely insane time and I don't even know where to start to construct and discuss this Chainsaw Friday craziness so let's look at tonight's Cork & Kerry tour stop and Angi giving birth to a new show member. First things first, Cork & Kerry tonight, there will be two pairs of Metallica tickets and a chainsaw. That's right, someone in legal decided it would be okay to let these two dingdongs wander drunkenly around the bar with a chainsaw. Here's the thing though, this was meant to be a prop chainsaw to celebrate Chainsaw Friday but that was not enough for Angi. No, she put her foot down as the host of this trainwreck show and wanted to give away the chainsaw. It was meant to be given away at the next tour stop but because she runs the asylum, she is going to buy another one and give the one they are bringing with them tonight away. So if you see someone wandering around The Loop with a chainsaw tonight, congratulate our winner and pray they aren't a serial killer. Speaking of people we hope aren't killers, also at Cork & Kerry tonight will be the newest member of the Angi Taylor Show. See, when the ratings are incredible like ours are, the big bosses allow for the morning zoo to expand a little by opening purse strings that are normally tighter than Marris' ass. Gone are the days of a pizza party for ratings, we are getting a third chair in the studio. His name is Michael Mason, he just moved to Chicago this week from Denver and he is a Cubs fan, which means Angi is alone on epic loser White Sox island. While the roadies will get a chance to meet Michael (and his wife) at Cork & Kerry tonight, he officially begins the show on Monday. The "8 foot tall, tatted up social media sweetheart," deserves an absolutely amazing Chicago Welcome (which is a little different than a San Diego Thank You.) Since he is new to town and we on this show are notorious pranksters (see: a-hole's,) we're going to have a little fun next week with a round of wrong answers only places in Chicago Michael needs to go visit. That's right, barely stepping foot in the studio and Angi is already looking for ways to make this guy regret being here. Either way, if you're going out tonight go say hi to our new boy or if you're going to be busy doing one of the 800 things there are to do this weekend in the city, tune in on Monday morning to meet him properly.

Well, Thursday has arrived once more and with a big event coming up tomorrow, you would think all is right in the world. However, you're listening to this show so you should know that is never going to be the case so let's break out the next round of Shenanigansgate as Angi attacked Marris this morning over his attempt to screw her. Now, I could see why your mind would land in the gutter hearing that (and more so if you listened to the Daily Discussion Topic because that felt like doing a 3 day bender of rails and booze) but you need to get your head right. The alleged screw job is coming via the iHeart Fantasy Football League which Marris is the commissioner of and Angi has made to the Super Bowl of for the last two years. The thing is, both of those years, Angi lost to a co-worker named Andrew both times but a change of career made it seem that she would be a lock this year. Andrew up and quit iHeart and so he technically is no longer an employee which means he shouldn't be playing this year. However, commissioner Marris has decided that Andrew needs to play this year since he is the reigning champ and needs to defend his throne. That's right, the guy who doesn't work at the company is playing in the company league and Angi is furious. While screaming that all this is against the rules, Marris told Angi that he is the one who creates the rules and therefore, she has no say so. Marris runs his league like a dictatorship so it's get in line or get out. Angi, enraged at the ruling about the rules, threatened not to play but then changed her mind and will play. Obviously, the issue here is Angi does not want Andrew to beat her again for a third year in a row (and seeing as she loses Employee of the Quarter all the time, she should be used to taking L's.) Angi then offered another scenario, what if Jay the Straight wanted in even though he doesn't work at iHeart. Marris explained that if they were short players, he would be allowed a spot but spoiler alert: they're not. Angi tried to argue that he could be the champ at his new job (which could be literally anywhere as iHeart pays the staff pennies.) She also didn't understand the need for a legacy when he no longer works there so why bother upholding his achievements? Marris explained that if he were to quit (let's face it, HR firing him is more likely,) he too would want to be able to defend if he was champion. Even more frustrating for Angi was the acknowledgement that if Andrew won again, he would be back the following year to fight once more. She argued that not working at iHeart meant you no longer get the perks (pizza parties, low pay) like the station BBQ. Marris added though that he's seen more randos at those events than people who quit and came back. With that in mind, the decision is made and Andrew stays but Angi is planning on overthrowing Marris at some point.

Middle of the week is the perfect way to segway into middle aged (well, maybe a bit older, the way things are sagging on Angi you'd think she's like 110.) This morning, we explored aging up by breaking out the good old Sarah McLachlan to backdrop Angi's newest feud. That's right, it's Angi vs. the USPS but not for reasons you would assume (and by that I mean it's more delusional than you could probably imagine.) Her ire was spawned from a (incorrect) belief that her mail people are trolling her because after checking the mail for the first time in 5 days, 13 of the 17 pieces of mail were from AARP. On the cover of this month's issue (I'm assuming they come monthly, old people like Angi die pretty fast so they need to pump those things out in short order,) was Kevin Costner (who was probably complaining how he lost his house financing a garbage project.) While crying that she didn't want to learn about how to fight "sitting disease," she then turned her ire from the post office to imaginary people who signed her old ass up for it. Of course, in a rare moment of lucidity in her early onset brain, it dawned on her that she may have actually signed up for it because of discounts. Though she hooted and hollered how she didn't want AARP and wasn't ready for it (see: she is,) she then found an article about puzzles and ways to help sugar cravings. Of course, we were back in the red once she stumbled upon the lightest mobility scooter (for those of you wondering, yes she was thumbing through the magazine on air, hence these weird jumping points.) Marris added that perhaps we should look into a mobility scooter because the last time she got on something with wheels, she almost fell into the Chicago River. We moved on then to an article on Marilu Henner and Jewel, who has great cans according to Angi. As Marris tried to explain to her that some of this stuff could be helpful, Angi turned more pages and yelled about tightrope artists and mariachi bands (I don't know if that was in the magazine or if she was having a senior moment.) After then going on about how she doesn't want to read articles from AARP (while reading articles from AARP,) she returned once again to blaming the postal workers for this nonsense. Marris, again attempting to be the world's best orderly when it comes to dealing with early onset patients, said she does have her supper at 4 or 5 P.M. because she's usually in bed by like 7. Somehow, this led us back to sitting disease (I know all of this reads like a jumbled mess but this is how it was on air so don't yell at me!) and how it diminishes brain function (like we have more room for that with her.) Then we were back to Kevin Costner again before settling on Angi probably needing a life alert bracelet and The Clapper as she tends to fall a lot since she's older than the first submarine (1620.)

Well, that was a nice little breather from having to come up with witty things to say every morning but while Marris walked more than he has in years and Angi spent two days throwing up from heat stroke, I was drunk and watching the Lollapalooza sets from the comfort of home. With that done for the year and Metallica looming, it only makes sense to look at cool things from childhood as a Daily Discussion Topic. Well actually, that was me trying to make this more appealing because we're really going to explore things the roadies weren't allowed to do as kids that others got to do. Spawned from a point about how the royal bloodline brats are not allowed to do certain things, it's actually kind of crazy how many restrictions are put in place. For example, no shellfish (because they might be poisoned "or something" according to Angi.) No travel together (obviously.) No wearing black during the day. They are not allowed to keep gifts that they are given. They are not allowed to play Monopoly as it tends to result in fist fights (or in this case, like duels to the death.) Even though the royal kids clearly have it bad, that wasn't to say there were things that Angi and Marris weren't allowed to do. For example, Angi was never allowed to have sleepovers because her mothers husband at the time was a drunk (like step father, like daughter.) Luckily, she was allowed to stay at other peoples house which I'm sure always went down like that episode of Roseanne where Becky got a hangover after drinking "tornadoes." As for Marris, he was not allowed to have sugary cereals which meant the Marris household was all Kix and Cheerios. However, when he would go to a friend's house, he was chowing down on Apple Jacks (which if you've tasted lately, are disgusting.) I can't think of things I wasn't allowed to do, my parents allowed us to be a bit out of control and latchkey so let's go to the Request Line and the roadies, shall we. Shane wasn't allowed to watch TV at all even though his parents got to enjoy it in the comfort of their bedrooms. Joanna was not allowed to go to concerts (like Bruce Springsteen) so she just stopped telling her mom where she was going. The assumption was she would go to a concert and get loaded. Tammy was not allowed to go to all night roller rink lock ins even though her brother was. Mike was not allowed to have a TV in his room which isn't as bad as Shane at least. Angi too was not allowed to have a TV in her room and everything she watched was monitored. Roger was not allowed to keep his KIϟϟ collectors cards because they looked like "devils." Sharri was not allowed to do after school activities, go to dances, do sports or cheerleading and she never figured out why her single dad would not allow it. As for Angi, she didn't get to do stuff as well but that's because she was poor. If you are looking for more roadie thoughts or have your own, hit up our Facebook group (Angi Taylor Show) and drop us a comment.