The Best of You

Welcome to The Best of You Every Day. Today's Scripture is: Psalm 116:5-7 Go Deeper: Follow Dr. Alison on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dralisoncook/?hl=en ⁠Sign up⁠ for Dr. Alison's free weekly email for ongoing reflection and support. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to The Best of You Every Day. Today's Scripture is: Galatians 5:22–25 Go Deeper: Episode 96: Signs of Emotional Immaturity & How to Bring More Emotional Health to Your Relationships Episode 70: Mastering the Art of Emotional IntelligenceFollow Dr. Alison on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dralisoncook/?hl=en ⁠Sign up⁠ for Dr. Alison's free weekly email for ongoing reflection and support. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Have you ever left a conversation thinking, That's not what I meant — and still felt the distance linger? Do you ever wonder why relationships feel exhausting, confusing, or fragile… even when you genuinely try to do the right thing? Dr. Alison is joined by counselor and author Debra Fileta for a conversation that names a quiet tension many people live with but rarely articulate. Sometimes the hardest part of relationships isn't a lack of love—it's the gap between what we intend and what others experience. Together, you'll explore: Why do the same relational patterns keep repeating? Why does communication break down so quickly under stress? Why do good intentions sometimes land as hurt or distant? Why does love feel like it should be enough… but often isn't? If you've ever thought, Why does this still feel so hard when I care so much? — this episode creates space to ask better questions, without pressure to already have the answers.

Welcome to The Best of You Every Day. Today's Scripture is: Exodus 31:1–6 Go Deeper: Episode 192: The Work Only Humans Can Do—Why Connection, Vocation, and Meaning Still Matter in a World of AI Episode 53: How to Claim Your Strengths & Thrive at Home & Work Follow Dr. Alison on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dralisoncook/?hl=en ⁠Sign up⁠ for Dr. Alison's free weekly email for ongoing reflection and support. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to The Best of You Every Day. Today's Scripture is: Matthew 7:15–20 Go Deeper: Episode 178: How to Recognize Toxic Tactics & Stop Taking the Bait Episode 149: 5 Toxic Behaviors & How to Protect Your Soul Follow Dr. Alison on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dralisoncook/?hl=en ⁠Sign up⁠ for Dr. Alison's free weekly email for ongoing reflection and support. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to The Best of You Every Day. Today's Scripture is: Psalm 42:1–5 Go Deeper: Episode 77: The Dark Night of the Soul—Why It Happens & What It Means Episode 99: Exploring a Broken Spirit & the Dark Night of the Soul Follow Dr. Alison on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dralisoncook/?hl=en ⁠Sign up⁠ for Dr. Alison's free weekly email for ongoing reflection and support. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to The Best of You Every Day. Today's Scripture: Hebrews 12:11. Hebrews 12 uses language about discipline and parenthood that may feel tender or painful if you've experienced harm from a parent or authority figure. If that's you, please feel free to skip this episode or return when it feels safer. (We're reading from The Message today to help soften the edges and highlight the heart of the passage.) Episode 128: Healing Generational TraumaEpisode 182: Self-Esteem Culture, Therapy, & Wholeness in Christ Follow Dr. Alison on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dralisoncook/?hl=en ⁠Sign up⁠ for Dr. Alison's free weekly email for ongoing reflection and support. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What does it mean to live out our calling in a world increasingly shaped by technology, efficiency, and automation? In this episode, Dr. Alison explores the deeper meaning of vocation — not simply as a job or career path, but as the unique way each of us is meant to bring care, creativity, and connection into the world. Joined by sociologist Dr. Allison Pugh, professor at Johns Hopkins University and author of The Last Human Job, they reflect on what Dr. Pugh calls “connective labor” — the deeply human work of seeing others and allowing ourselves to be seen. This episode explores: -Why the most important part of vocation has almost nothing to do with your resume -The hidden kind of work you're doing every day-The small moment that can restore dignity in an instant (and why most of us miss it) -The tradeoff nobody talks about: when “more efficient” becomes “less human” -The uncomfortable question technology can't answer for you — and why it matters right now -The choice you still have (even in a system that feels unchangeable) As workplaces change and technologies like AI reshape how we interact, this conversation offers a grounding reminder: while tools may deliver information, they can never replace mutual presence, empathy, and relational connection. More Resources: Follow Dr. Alison on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dralisoncook/?hl=en

Welcome to The Best of You Every Day. Today's Scripture is: 1 Kings 19:1–13 Go Deeper: Episode 99: I Shouldn't Feel Like My Spirit is Broken Episode 136: Escaping Spiritual Exhaustion & Trusting Divine Love ⁠Sign up⁠ for Dr. Alison's free weekly email for ongoing reflection and support. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to The Best of You Every Day. Today's Scripture is: Mark 10:46–52 Go Deeper: Read the first three chapters of The Best of You and download a free PDF workbook here. Sign up⁠ for Dr. Alison's free weekly email for ongoing reflection and support. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to The Best of You Every Day Today's Scripture is: Psalm 62:5–8 Go Deeper: Episode 176: Intimacy with God in a Noisy World Episode 159: Spiritual Drowning, Honest Questions, & a God Who Doesn't Let Go ⁠Sign up⁠ for Dr. Alison's free weekly email for ongoing reflection and support. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to The Best of You Every Day. Today's Scripture is Galatians 6:2–5. Go Deeper: Episode 138: The Hidden Cost of Overfunctioning Episode 155: Prioritize What Matters, Avoid Burnout, and Navigate Toxicity ⁠Sign up⁠ for Dr. Alison's free weekly email for ongoing reflection and support. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

How do you actually heal and change—not just cope or try harder? In this solo episode, Dr. Alison reflects on five core insights about faith, attachment, and the inner life—not as a plan for self-improvement, but as wisdom for formation. January often comes with pressure to reset, optimize, and fix ourselves. But many of us begin the year already tired — weary of striving, and hungry for something deeper. This episode offers a different invitation. Rather than asking what to change, Dr. Alison invites us to notice how we are already being formed — especially in moments of stress, fear, and uncertainty. In this conversation, Dr. Alison explores: Why faith is not just what we believe The hidden way your nervous system influences your spiritual life What many “spiritual struggles” are really pointing to The missing ingredient most change efforts overlook Why striving for perfection keeps so many people stuck Growth isn't about eliminating fear or complexity. It's learning where to return when fear inevitably shows up.

Welcome to The Best of You Every Day. Today's Scripture is Deuteronomy 6:4–9. Go Deeper: Episode 186: A Simple Practice to Interrupt Stress, Overwhelm, and Habit Loops Episode 190: Self-Brain Surgery, Overcoming Trauma, and the Courage to Change How You Think ⁠Sign up⁠ for Dr. Alison's free weekly email for ongoing reflection and support. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to The Best of You Every Day.Today's Scripture is Luke 10:38–42 .Go Deeper: Episode 95: 4 Toxic Behaviors & How to Protect Yourself Get a free Map of the Soul to help you get curious about the parts of your own soul in partnership with God's Spirit. ⁠Sign up⁠ for Dr. Alison's free weekly email for ongoing reflection and support.While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to The Best of You Every Day. Today's Scripture is Psalm 1:1-4. Go Deeper: Episode 141: How Self-Compassion Shapes Resilience with Aundi Kolber Episode 76: Finding the Strength to Move Forward After Loss with Granger Smith Episode 46: How Jesus Regulated Emotions with Aundi Kolber ⁠I Shouldn't Feel This Way⁠ — Learn to understand & regulate your emotions. ⁠The Best of You ⁠— Learn to set healthy boundaries. ⁠Boundaries For Your Soul⁠ — Learn a proven method of inner healing. ⁠Sign up⁠ for Dr. Alison's free weekly email for ongoing reflection and support. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to The Best of You Every Day. Today's Scripture is Romans 8:5-6 . Go Deeper: Episode 56: Am I Really Supposed to Die to Myself Episode 29: How to Stop Chasing Approval and Start Living the Life You Actually Want ⁠I Shouldn't Feel This Way⁠ — Learn to understand & regulate your emotions. ⁠The Best of You ⁠— Discover your true self in God. ⁠Boundaries For Your Soul⁠ — Learn to access the Spirit-led self within. ⁠Sign up⁠ for Dr. Alison's free weekly email for ongoing reflection and support. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What if healing doesn't start with managing your emotions—but with understanding how your brain responds to fear, grief, and hope? In this episode, Dr. Alison sits down with neurosurgeon, author, and Iraq War veteran Dr. Lee Warren to explore trauma, loss, faith, and the brain's God-given capacity to change.  After unimaginable loss, Dr. Warren shares how “self-brain surgery”—learning to notice and interrupt destructive thought patterns—helped him restore hope and agency without bypassing grief. This conversation will help you understand: —Why most of our thoughts are repetitive, negative, and often untrue —How trauma wires automatic thoughts—and how those patterns can change —How faith and neuroscience meet in practical ways —The difference between the mind and the brain, and why that distinction matters for healing This episode offers hope without shortcuts. It honors the reality of suffering while reminding us that our past does not get the final word — not neurologically, not emotionally, and not spiritually.

Welcome to The Best of You Every Day. Today's Scripture is Exodus 20:12. Go Deeper: Episode 161: Healing from Dysfunctional Family Patterns Episode 162: When Reconnection Feels Impossible Episode 147: Making Sense of Your Family Story ⁠⁠I Shouldn't Feel This Way⁠⁠ — Learn to understand & regulate your emotions. ⁠⁠The Best of You⁠ ⁠— Heal painful patterns. ⁠⁠Boundaries For Your Soul⁠ ⁠— Manage overwhelming emotions. ⁠⁠Sign up⁠⁠ for Dr. Alison's free weekly email for ongoing reflection and support. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to The Best of You Every Day. Today's Scripture is Luke 10:38-42. Go Deeper:⁠ Episode 185⁠: For the Ones who are Overwhelmed ⁠Episode 170⁠: The Truth About Venting ⁠⁠I Shouldn't Feel This Way⁠⁠ — Learn to understand & regulate your emotions. ⁠⁠The Best of You ⁠⁠— Learn to set healthy boundaries. ⁠⁠Boundaries For Your Soul⁠⁠ — Learn a proven method of inner healing. ⁠⁠Sign up⁠⁠ for Dr. Alison's free weekly email for ongoing reflection and support.  While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to The Best of You Every Day. Today's Scripture is Psalm 131. Go Deeper: Episode 16: What are Attachment Styles? Episode 143: Reparenting Your Younger Self ⁠I Shouldn't Feel This Way⁠ — Learn to understand & regulate your emotions. ⁠The Best of You ⁠— Learn to set healthy boundaries. ⁠Boundaries For Your Soul⁠ — Learn a proven method of inner healing. ⁠Sign up⁠ for Dr. Alison's free weekly email for ongoing reflection and support.  While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to The Best of You Every Day! Today's Scripture is Matthew 6:25–29 & 34. Go Deeper: ⁠Episode 129⁠⁠: Understanding Your Anxiety—A Step-by-Step Guide to Finding Calm Episode 167: Can I Pray the Anxiety Away? I Shouldn't Feel This Way — Learn to understand and regulate your emotions. The Best of You — Learn to set healthy boundaries. Boundaries For Your Soul — Learn a proven method of inner healing. Sign up for Dr. Alison's free weekly email for ongoing reflection and support. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

January has a way of pulling us straight into the how. How will I fix what feels off? How will I be more disciplined? How will I finally get it right? But what if there's a deeper—and more grounding—place to begin? Dr. Alison opens the year by inviting you to start somewhere different. Instead of beginning with self-improvement or striving, Scripture starts with meaning, presence, and relationship. In this episode, you'll learn: Why losing sight of the why fuels anxiety, striving, and burnout How meaning and grounding are closer than you think What “the light shines in the darkness” really means How orienting your life around love changes everything Plus, you'll hear a special announcement about something new coming to The Best of You—a daily way to stay anchored in Scripture and wisdom as you move through your day. For additional resources and the full episode transcript, visit the podcast episode page here If you loved this episode, check out: Episode 122: Navigating Anxiety, Therapy, and Spiritual Formation with John Mark Comer  Episode 113: A New Vision Of Human Flourishing with Dr. Warren Kinghorn Get I Shouldn't Feel This Way for just $2.99. Grab your 3 free Boundaries For Your Soul resources here Download Alison's free printable boundaries guide when you sign up for her weekly email. Got a question? Call 307-429-2525 and leave a message for a future episode. Thanks to our Sponsors! Go to ⁠Quince.com/bestofyou⁠ for 365-day returns, plus free shipping on your order! While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ © 2025 Alison Cook. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. Please do not copy or share the contents of this webpage or transcript without permission from the author. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If gratitude and grief seem to arrive hand in hand this season or hope feels costly, like putting your armor down in the middle of a battle… Nothing is wrong with you. Your brain is doing exactly what it was designed to do. Dr. Alison sits down with researcher, author, trauma educator, and joy scholar Dr. MaryCatherine McDonald to explore the often misunderstood relationship between trauma and joy. Drawing from neuroscience, trauma research, and lived experience, Dr MaryCatherine explains why joy can feel threatening after loss or prolonged stress. Together, they unpack: Why trauma responses are strength responses, not weaknesses The “joy thieves” that quietly steal our capacity for delight Why joy and grief are not opposites, and often show up together How tiny moments can gently retrain your brain for joy What neuroscientists call the hope circuit, and how to activate it

If the holidays bring up a lot for you, old roles, old emotions, or the pressure to keep everyone happy, you're not alone. Christmas has a way of activating the patterns and survival strategies that once helped you feel safe, pleasing, perfecting, over-functioning, or shutting down. In this episode, Dr. Alison Cook shares how these patterns show up in her own life, why they resurface, and how you can gently find your way back to peace. You'll learn: the 3 types of needs that get tangled inside why holiday dynamics awaken old wounds and responses a simple way to return to the place of peace at your center how to redefine “success” this holiday season

If stress or discomfort sends you into overthinking, numbing, or trying to fix what you can't control… If certain habits feel automatic no matter how much you try to change them… You're not alone, and your brain is more trainable than you think. In this episode, Dr. Alison Cook sits down with Dr. Jud Brewer—psychiatrist, neuroscientist, and New York Times best-selling author who specializes in habit change and mindfulness.  They unpack why we get stuck in these loops and a simple practice to steady your soul. Instead of relying on willpower or self-judgment, this conversation invites you to: Notice your inner patterns with kindness Differentiate discomfort from distress Understand the habit loops that drive anxiety, worry, or overthinking Apply the #1 tool to help you create real, lasting change Deepen your connection to God This episode is a grounding companion for anyone navigating stress, emotional triggers, or the pull toward old coping strategies—especially in seasons that stir up more than we expect.

If you've ever found yourself wide awake at night replaying a conversation If you spiral through guilt after setting even the gentlest boundary If you carry everyone else's emotions while losing sight of your own You're in good company. In today's episode, Dr. Alison shares personally about these moments in her own life and guides you through a real-time practice you can do right where you are. It's the most effective tool we've found to help when overwhelm rises, when you're tempted to slip back into people-pleasing, or when conflict sends your nervous system into overdrive. Instead of overthinking, overanalyzing, or pushing your feelings aside, this practice helps you: Notice what's happening inside with kindness Connect with the part of you that's working overtime to keep you safe Offer compassion to your own soul — the same compassion you extend so easily to others Invite God's loving, steady presence into the places that feel tangled, tense, or afraid

We spend so much energy trying to silence anxiety. But what if it isn't an enemy to defeat—what if it's a signal to understand? This week, Dr. Alison talks with Dr. Bethany Teachman, professor of clinical psychology at the University of Virginia and director of the PACT Lab, about what healthy anxiety looks like, why it's actually useful, and how to stop letting it run your life.  Dr. Teachman explains how to know when anxiety is becoming a problem and shares practical ways to calm anxious thoughts, build resilience, and approach your fears with curiosity instead of control. She says, “Anxiety is uncomfortable, but it's not dangerous, when you stop treating it like a threat, it loses its power over you.” You'll learn: The difference between healthy anxiety and unhealthy anxiety How to recognize when your threat response doesn't match the situation Why trying to “get rid” of anxiety often makes it worse How reframing challenges as opportunities builds resilience Why doom-scrolling keeps us trapped in fear Check out more free resources on anxiety: TYDE (Thriving Youth in a Digital Environment) — A University of Virginia initiative co-directed by Dr. Teachman focused on youth, technology, and mental health. MindTrails — A suite of digital and mobile interventions designed to help people manage anxiety and increase access to care, including.  If you liked this episode, you'll love:  Episode 129: Understanding Your Anxiety Episode 54: Can I Pray My Anxiety Away?

It can happen so fast - you feel grateful one moment, and five minutes on Instagram later you're suddenly feeling small or behind. But what if comparison isn't the problem itself, but a messenger? Dr. Alison explores how comparison, when we pause to listen, can actually reveal our deepest longings and lead us back to connection with God, with others, and with ourselves. She explains why comparison is wired into us, what it's trying to show us, and how to shift from competition to curiosity and compassion. This conversation invites you to slow down, notice what stirs inside you when comparison shows up, and remember: your story is unfolding at its own sacred pace. In this episode, we cover: Why comparison isn't always toxic, and what it's really telling you How to move from calibration to condemnation (and back again) The two types of comparison A simple three-step practice to use when you find yourself comparing

When insecurity takes over, most of us double down on self-improvement. But what if freedom doesn't come from focusing more on yourself - but less? In this powerful conversation, Dr. Alison and author of Free of Me and Gazing at God, Sharon Hodde Miller, discuss the promises and pitfalls of self-esteem culture - and why a bigger story of belovedness, stewardship, and connection sets us free.  We talk about how self-preoccupation doesn't improve self-esteem, why “just love yourself more” can reinforce the problem, and how beholding God (not abandoning yourself) recenters your life with humility and purpose. In this episode, we cover: Why self-focus can erode your confidence and joy The difference between self-esteem and self-preoccupation What it means to de-center yourself without losing your worth How wounds can masquerade as pride or insecurity The freedom that comes from remembering: you are not the hero of the story Get your hands on a copy of Sharon's books! You can find them here:

What do you do when relationships feels risky after you've been hurt, betrayed, or let down, yet you still crave real connection? This week, Dr. Alison is joined by speaker, and author Toni Collier, for a powerful and honest conversation about healing through community and learning how to trust again after deep pain.  Toni shares her story of betrayal and loss, and how she discovered the power of safe people - the kind who can hold your heart without judgment and help you rebuild when life falls apart. Together, they unpack what real friendship looks like and why isolation, while it feels safe, can slowly destroy us. You'll walk away with language for repair, courage to take off your “strong friend” cape, and practical wisdom for finding (and becoming) the kind of people who can walk with you through both heartbreak and healing. This episode explores: Why healing requires safe people, not just safe spaces How to build a community that can hold your story The difference between isolation and refuge The courage it takes to say, “I need help” The three steps to finding and keeping trustworthy friends You can find Toni's powerful book here:

What do you do when someone you love - whether it's your kids, a spouse, or a friend - keeps doing the same maddening things?  This week, we're tackling how to approach the most frustrating dynamics in any relationship. Dr. Alison is joined by award-winning psychologist Dr. J. Stuart Ablon, founder of Think:Kids at Massachusetts General Hospital, and Associate Professor at Harvard Medical School.  He shares a game-changing mindset shift: most challenging behavior is about skill, not will. If you've ever thought, “They just don't care,” about someone you love, this conversation provides a proven, practical path to real solutions.  This episode explores: The five core skills that drive every behavior The real reason most people struggle How to keep your cool and trade judgment for curiosity The exact words that lower defensiveness fast Why boundaries still matter—and how to set them collaboratively A step-by-step walkthrough of Collaborative Problem Solving in action For more from Dr. Stuart Ablon, check out his many free resources:

The Best of You Podcast is your weekly space for wholehearted healing and soul-deep growth. Every Thursday you'll learn from Dr. Alison Cook—a psychologist, author, and former teacher who's passionate about breaking down complex ideas into simple, practical tools you can use every day. You'll find science-backed strategies and spiritual wisdom to help you: Heal from past wounds Set healthy, soul-honoring boundaries Strengthen your relationships And show up more fully as YOU Whether you're navigating overwhelm, rebuilding trust, or learning to rest in a busy world, this podcast is here to help you cultivate the clarity, courage, and compassion it takes to live with wholeness. Now with video episodes and fresh conversations for a new season, The Best of You is more than a podcast—it's a community choosing hope, healing, and transformation together. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What if you weren't meant to trust blindly, but to trust wisely? Trust is sacred - and when it's broken, it's easy to shut down or swing toward over-trusting. In this episode, Alison explores how to cultivate a steady, discerning trust, one that honors both your boundaries and your desire for connection. Dr. Alison explores what it means to build wise trust: the kind that's discerning but still open to love. You'll learn practical steps to protect your heart without hardening it, and how to partner with God in cultivating grounded, courageous trust that leads to real connection. In this episode, we explore: How broken trust impacts our nervous system and relationships The difference between naïve trust and wise, grounded trust How to protect your heart without closing it off Practical steps to rebuild trust - with yourself, others, and God Why choosing openness is one of the bravest things you can do If you've been hurt, disappointed, or afraid to let people in again, this episode will give you language, perspective, and hope for what it looks like to trust wisely - and love freely - again. Follow Dr. Alison on Instagram @dralisoncook

What do you do when someone's behavior leaves you feeling small, confused, or constantly on edge?  That uneasy feeling isn't random, it's often a signal that something toxic is at play. The Bible urges us to be wise as serpents and innocent as doves - to stay discerning, not naïve, in our relationships. Yet many of us brush off harmful patterns because we want to keep the peace, avoid conflict, or because our empathy and loyalty run deep. The problem? Those very strengths can make us more vulnerable to toxic strategies. In this episode Dr. Alison names four of the most common toxic behaviors - manipulation, gaslighting, constant criticism, and triangulation - and shows you how to recognize them before they take root. She unpacks how to tell the difference between a one-time mistake and a repeated pattern of harm, and she offers practical tools to protect yourself without losing your compassion. In this episode, we explore: The difference between mistakes and toxic patterns 4 common toxic behaviors and what they look like in real life The core root beneath toxic strategies How to deal with false guilt and set yourself free If you've ever struggled with guilt, second-guessed your instincts, or felt trapped in a cycle of blame, this conversation will give you language, clarity, and hope for moving forward with wisdom and strength.

Where do you turn when heartache threatens to take over your whole life? This week, Dr Alison is joined by Amber Smith to talk about her journey from crushing grief to quiet, hard-won hope. Many of you know part of her story: the unthinkable loss of her three-year-old son, River, in 2019.  Together, they talk about the raw reality of grief; how faith can be both anchor and wrestle, how a marriage can survive when each person's pain looks different, and why welcoming joy again is not a betrayal of what you've lost. If you've ever faced heartbreak or walked alongside someone in deep pain, this conversation will meet you right where you are - whether you're on your own bathroom floor or standing beside someone who is. In this episode, we explore: Amber's story of losing her son, River, and the spiritual transformation that followed The “before and after” shift that tragedy brings to faith and identity How she and her husband, Granger Smith, fought for their marriage Why grief can quietly become an idol How holding space for grief can bring a family closer This episode blends honesty, tenderness, and practical wisdom, exploring what it means to choose life and love while discovering God's presence in moments when hope feels distant.

When the world feels on fire, how do our souls find rest in God alone? This week's two-part episode is close to my heart. In the wake of recent violence, I first pause to reflect on what it means to choose love in an age when outrage feels easier. From there, I turn to a conversation with my friend and mentor, Dr. Stephen Macchia. Steve has spent decades guiding people into deeper intimacy with God through practices of silence, prayer, and community. Together we explore the barriers distraction creates, why being truly listened to is so healing, and how slowing down opens space for God's presence in our lives. This episode is an invitation to lay down outrage, pick up compassion, and step into the quiet spaces where God does His best work.

The world has changed, and raising kids now requires a new kind of courage. In this encouraging, yet practical episode, Dr. Alison is joined by counselors and best-selling authors Sissy Goff and David Thomas of Daystar Counseling in Nashville. Together, they discuss why anxiety is showing up earlier and more intensely in children, and how parents can respond with both empathy and practical tools.  Sissy and David share practical & creative ways they're helping kids build courage, resilience, self-control, and perspective. From therapy dogs and illustrated children's books, to powerful stories from their counseling practice, Sissy and David deliver hopeful reminders that your calm matters, and practical strategies can help your kids step into the world with more confidence.  This episode explores: Why childhood anxiety is rising, and how it looks different in boys and girls The surprising ways technology impacts emotional health The unintended consequence of overprotective parenting Practical tools  that help kids develop resilience, risk-taking, and healthy coping When to seek counseling for your child This episode is a hopeful reminder: Kids don't need a perfect parent. They need a present one who believes in their courage and helps them practice it. For More from David and Sissy: Check out their website, https://www.raisingboysandgirls.com and pre-order the DayStar Dogs books here:

In this episode, Dr. Alison is joined by counselor and podcast host Trey Tucker for an honest conversation about the rise of therapy culture online, the pitfalls of over-identifying with a diagnosis, and how parents can help kids build resilience instead of anxiety. Together, they unpack: The rise of “TikTok Therapy”—what's helpful about therapy content online and where it falls short. Why so many people are tempted to define themselves by a diagnosis—and how that can keep us stuck. The difference between true boundaries and emotional avoidance. Parenting without panic: how to model calm presence instead of passing anxiety on to the next generation. Why resilience, not fragility, is one of the greatest gifts we can offer our kids. Alison and Trey bring different perspectives with a shared passion for nuance, honesty, and practical hope. It's a refreshing, thought-provoking dialogue that will encourage you to think differently about therapy, identity, and how we show up in family life.

What does it take to make the church a safer place for women's voices? This week Dr Alison is joined by husband-and-wife therapists Dr. Christy Bauman and Andrew Bauman, who are doing groundbreaking work at the intersection of women's stories, embodiment, and spiritual safety. Together, they offer both prophetic challenge and practical hope for how we can build healthier faith communities. In the first half of the episode, Christy takes us into the sacred rites of passage women experience, highlighting women's voices in the Bible. In the second half, Andrew shares from his extensive research, offering a vision for safe churches where power is shared, voices are honored, and healing is possible. Together, Christy and Andrew model what's possible when men and women work side by side for change.  You'll learn: The six symbolic rites of passage women experience over a lifetime—and why reclaiming them matters How Christy helps women see their bodies as sacred places of dignity and spiritual depth The results of their research with 2,800+ women who work in church settings A vision for churches where power is shared and women's voices are truly honored  A note of care: This episode includes sensitive topics such as pornography, domestic violence, and harm related to women's bodies. Please listen gently and step away if you need to. Learn more from Christy and Andrew:

Have you ever found yourself afraid to feel joy - worried that if you celebrate, the other shoe will inevitably drop? So many of us quietly hold joy at arm's length. We tell ourselves it's safer not to get our hopes up than to risk being let down again. What if joy isn't a fleeting feeling for the lucky few, but a courageous practice we can all learn? Dr Alison sits down with therapist and author Nicole Zasowski to talk about her journey of choosing joy in the face of loss. Nicole shares how she discovered that joy can be the most vulnerable emotion of all - and why learning to celebrate is one of the most important practices we can cultivate in our lives. Together, you'll learn: The surprising reason joy can feel harder than grief or disappointment The difference between toxic positivity and true, grounded joy Why pessimism and cynicism are really forms of control Practical ways to retrain your mind to savor what's good—even in difficult seasons What Scripture and neuroscience teach us about joy

Why do we work so hard to earn the approval of others? And what is it really costing us? In this candid, practical episode, Dr. Alison tackles one of the most common struggles she hears from so many of you: people pleasing. You'll hear powerful voice messages from listeners as she explores the many forms this pattern can take—from avoiding conflict, to saying “yes” when you want to say “no,” to slowly losing sight of who you really are. Together, you'll learn: 5 common roots of people pleasing How certain Bible verses get misused to reinforce self-erasure The high cost of people pleasing 3 simple steps to move toward wholeness