Transgender Woman Talking

In this installment of Transgender Woman Talking, Elle hosts a conversation with Mary Almy and Cheryl Shaver about a documentary they created together. Cheryl is a filmmaker and director who spent time with Mary and her loved ones to explore and present an intimate portrait of her world. In the episode, Elle talks with the two of the importance of story-telling, the poignancy and power of Mary's experiences, and what we expect yet ahead. The film "Mary: Her Journey from Pain to Purpose" is currently in the film-festival pre-release phase and so has limited availability publicly. However, interested folks can reach out through instagram or Cheryl's website (below) to potentially host a screening or talk more about how to share the project. In some ways, the film resonates with Will Ferrell's work on "Will and Harper" a Netflix documentary about the celebrity's relationship with an old friend and colleague who transitioned later in life. Watch a Trailer for Mary's film here.Cheryl Shaver's website SLA Video can be found here; her company's facebook page is here.Mary and Cheryl's Instagram for the project.Film Will and Harper⁠⁠Elle's BlueSky Account⁠⁠As always, to learn more about Elle and her work, or to explore the possibility of accessing psychotherapy with her, please visit her website at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.estherloewen.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.For constructive feedback on the show, to ask questions, or to get access to the Fierce Femmes or Sacred Wounds support group, please email ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠twatpodcasting@gmail.com⁠⁠.

Elle checks back in with her thoughts about the current political discourse regarding trans people, including the many cruel and stigmatizing executive orders the new president of the United States signed during the first few weeks in office. Elle discusses some of the practical things she's doing to take care of herself, and how she believes we will all survive these times. Included in the episode are references to the following links and resources:Elle's BlueSky AccountThe Parable of the Sower &The Parable of the Talents by Octavia ButlerBalatro Game (*caution* you may not be able to stop)Amy Beaver'sTik-Tok EncouragementPride Plans Estate PlanningThe LGBTQ Center of the Desert in Palm Springs -Scott Hines Behavioral Health ClinicSacred Wounds Support Group (Zoom) for LGBTQ People who have experienced religious hurt. Every Wednesday morning at 10am PST.Email for access.As always, to learn more about Elle and her work, or to explore the possibility of accessing psychotherapy from her, please visit her website at⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.estherloewen.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.For constructive feedback on the show, to ask questions, or to get access to the Fierce Femmes support group, please email⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠twatpodcasting@gmail.com⁠. The group meets ever 2nd and 4th Tuesday evening of the month on Zoom at 6:30pm PST.

I am still here. And so are you. This episode is the first following the American election of 2024, which was upsetting and disappointing for many of us. In it, Elle talks about Transgender Day of Remembrance, and provides a recording of a speech she gave at a in person gathering in her area. In it, she also reflects on surviving, thriving, and still showing up even during difficult times. Blessed are the Trans Kids, Esther's poem based on The Beatitudes Therapy, a poem by Nayyira Waheed A brief history of Transgender Day of Remembrance As always, to learn more about Elle and her work, or to explore the possibility of accessing psychotherapy from her, please visit her website at ⁠⁠⁠⁠www.estherloewen.com⁠⁠⁠⁠. For constructive feedback on the show, to ask questions, or to get access to the Fierce Femmes support group, please email ⁠⁠⁠⁠twatpodcasting@gmail.com⁠

In this belated episode, Elle talks about a book published just this past summer on the history of women's running. Better Faster Farther, by Maggie Mertens, explores the myths that have restricted women athletes access to competitive sports (namely running) and that continue to threaten them to this day. Read or learn more about it here and here. Included in this conversation are reflections on trans athletes competing with women, as well as intersex athletes who sometimes do not discovery they are intersex until being tested as part of Olympic protocols. Some of the resources referenced in the show include: Erin in the Morning's reporting on Blaire Fleming, the volleyball player from San Jose State University who became the center of a hate campaign in October 2024. Bobbi Gibb, Marathoner Fierce Femmes Support Group As always, to learn more about Elle and her work, or to explore the possibility of accessing psychotherapy from her, please visit her website at ⁠⁠⁠www.estherloewen.com⁠⁠⁠. For constructive feedback on the show, to ask questions, or to get access to the Fierce Femmes support group, please email ⁠⁠⁠twatpodcasting@gmail.com⁠

This week's episode is a recording of a sermon/lecture that Elle gave back in May at Paradox Church in Redlands (see their website here). In the speech, Elle reflects on some of the unique ways that queer people are often harmed by especially high control religions. As a spiritual person and one who practiced rigid religion for many years, Elle has experiences with both being negatively impacted by religious trauma and also being a perpetrator as a Christian leader. Watch a video version of the sermon with Elle's visuals here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gZpnn09daAY&t=14s Learn more about Kevin Garcia's work on religious harm, including his book "Bad Theology Kills" here: https://www.thekevingarcia.com/ To learn more about inviting Elle to come speak for your event or organization, please visit her website: https://estherloewen.com/speaking As always, to learn more about Elle and her work, or to explore the possibility of accessing psychotherapy from her, please visit her website at ⁠⁠www.estherloewen.com⁠⁠. For constructive feedback on the show, to ask questions, or to get access to the Fierce Femmes support group, please email ⁠⁠twatpodcasting@gmail.com⁠

In this edition of the show, Elle talks about the idea of the 24/7 news cycle, and how it creates predictable waves of outrage throughout our culture, and into our lives. She reflects on the common denominators of the cycle as described by author Mark Manson (from the Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck) in a ⁠block post⁠, and explores how these dynamics are uniquely experienced by trans and gender expansive people. Elle talks about her experiences of feeling pressure to "have a take" when the news cycle hits, and anxiety about how that take or lack of a take may be received. Some of the resources discussed in the show include: ⁠Better, Faster, Farther,⁠ by Maggie Mertens The work of ⁠Erin in the Morning⁠ ⁠Church Redwood Trees Scandal⁠ As always, to learn more about Elle and her work, or to explore the possibility of accessing psychotherapy from her, please visit her website at ⁠www.estherloewen.com⁠. For constructive feedback on the show, to ask questions, or to get access to the Fierce Femmes support group, please email ⁠twatpodcasting@gmail.com⁠

Dr. Jill Hingston, LMFT is a psychotherapist, fierce ally of the trans community, and brilliant queer cisgender woman who currently serves as the Director of Behavioral Health Services at the LGBTQ Center of the Desert in Palm Springs. During this episode, Elle talks with Jill about her extensive experience working especially with transgender youth. Reach out to Jill via contact info on The Center website. Contact Elle via email at twatpodcasting@gmail.com to learn more about the support group Fierce Femmes, and to get involved. If you are in need of psychotherapy services and would like to talk with Elle about what therapy would look like with her, learn more and contact her on her website: (www.estherloewen.com).

In this episode, Elle addresses the elephant in the room and plans for the show going forward. She furthermore reflects on the many kinds of breaks we all take through our lives and transitions. This latest installment touches on themes of anxiety, trust, mindfulness practices, vacations, privilege and class, and of course transgender identities. . To join the Fierce Femmes support group on the 2nd & 4th Tuesdays of every month at 6:30pm PST, please email Elle at twatpodcasting@gmail.com. To offer questions, constructive feedback, and other connections to the show, use the same email :)

After an unplanned hiatus, Elle talks about the learned nature of gender, how gender is socialized, and the validity of gender and sex being changed and performed. She talks about the reasons we might choose to do gender in different ways, including safety, joy, and internal personality alignment. Some of the resources and additional materials referenced and recommended from this episode include: Abigail Thorn from Philosophy Tube on Judith Butler's ⁠Philosophy (ABSOLUTELY BRILLIANCE) Dylan Mulvaney - Days of Girlhood Lizzo - "Like a Girl" Judith Butler and Gender Trouble. Another piece by Judy in a recent NYT article. Fucking Harrison Butker and his Sexist Speech Reach out to Elle at twatpodcasting@gmail.com with questions, constructive feedback, and questions. To learn about what psychotherapy with Elle might look like, please visit her website: https://estherloewen.com/ and click "Therapy".

In this week's installment, Elle talks about a recent tattoo she got commemorating her graduation from therapy school. In addition, she reflects on some of the history and conversation in and around body modifications, including the perjorative accusation of "mutilation". Elle references her tattoo artist, Adrianne Marcella, as well as the work that she got done on her forearm for her transition ceremony in 2022 (read more here). Please take a minute to send Elle an email at twatpodcasting@gmail.com to ask questions, make constructive suggestions, or name possible guests. To inquire about psychotherapy with Elle, please fill out a request form on her website at: www.estherloewen.com

On this episode, Elle brings back her book report format, exploring her reactions and thoughts about Taylor Jenkins Reid's masterful novel, The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo. Among the themes included in this monologue are: reflections on allyship, the difficulty of being in the closet, how names and labels for the queer experience have changed over the years, the ways in which the dangers and societal expectations have shifted in even the last 70 years, the importance of feminism, and the fabulous and informative podcast "Bad Gays". Many thanks for tuning in to the program, for your constructive feedback, and encouragement. Continue to send it to twatpodcasting@gmail.com. If you'd like to become one of Elle's clients in therapy, and you are in the state of California, please reach out to her on her website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠www.estherloewen.com⁠⁠⁠⁠ and click on "Therapy".

In this episode of the program, Elle talks about some of her understanding of religious trauma or spiritual abuse. As a former pastor and lifetime member of the Seventh-day Adventist Christian denomination, she resonates very strongly with many of the experiences folks identifying as victims of religious trauma describe. In the program, Elle also reflects on some of her understanding of trauma in general from a therapist's perspective, as well as some of the symptoms that people who have been hurt by religion go through. Some of the resources mentioned on the episode this week include: Sacred Wounds religious trauma support group (Elle leads this weekly with one of her colleagues on Wednesday mornings at 10am on Zoom) - email for the link Bessel Van der Kolk - "The Body Keeps the Score" Gabor Mate - "The Myth of Normal" EMDR Trauma Therapy Marcos Torres and the Hunger Podcast on religious trauma / take the quiz here As always, thank you so much for listening to the program, for your constructive feedback, and encouragement. Continue to send it to twatpodcasting@gmail.com If you'd like to become one of Elle's clients in therapy, and you are in the state of California, please reach out to her on her website: ⁠⁠⁠www.estherloewen.com⁠⁠⁠ and click on "Therapy".

Nex Benedict was a 16 year old trans child who used he/him/they/them pronouns and lived in Oklahoma outside of Tulsa. Early in February, they were bullied to death in the girls bathroom at school. Before passing, video and text messages were captured from Nex reflecting on the experience of the fight that took his life and the years of harassment and bullying that led up to it. Many folks have been struck by his unjust and untimely passing - including bad actors and bigots like the head of Libs of TikTok who was recently appointed to an Oklahoma position overseeing library books. For most queer folks, however, Nex's killing evokes painful memories about our own traumas -- and the deaths of our queer siblings over the years including especially Matthew Shepherd, Brandon Teena, Brianna Ghey, the Q Nightclub Shooting, The Pulse, O'shae Sibley, and on and on and on. In this episode, Elle shares her feelings that come up after hearing of Nex's death -- as well as short recordings taken from the Vigil in her town. She finishes the episode with an invitation to take constructive action to push back against the hate. Some resources shared and mentioned on today's podcast include: Therapy with Elle "A Warped Version of the Bible Killed NEx Benedict" by Serene Jones The work of Kevin Garcia, "Bad Theology Kills" The work of Jeffrey Marsh As always, thank you so much for listening to the program, for your constructive feedback, and encouragement. Continue to send it to twatpodcasting@gmail.com If you'd like to become one of Elle's clients in therapy, and you are in the state of California, please reach out to her on her website: ⁠⁠www.estherloewen.com⁠⁠ and click on "Therapy".

Elle talks about some recent experiences she's had with haters, and how she chose to respond. She reflects on some of the principles she's used in the past (and present) for shaping reactions, offering a matrix of priorities that may arrive in a variety of priorities depending on the situation. The themes and topics addressed in this episode include Nex Benedict's death, verbal and physical threats, intimidation, personal safety, blocking and deleting on social media, attending to self-respect, getting our needs met, fighting for justice, ghosting, reconciliation, forgiveness, intimacy, and leaving good reviews :) Thank you once again for listening to the program, for your constructive feedback, and encouragement. Continue to send it to twatpodcasting@gmail.com If you'd like to become one of Elle's clients in therapy, and you are in the state of California, please reach out to her on her website: ⁠www.estherloewen.com⁠ and click on "Therapy".

This week's show features an interview recorded some time ago with one of Elle's coworkers at the LGBTQ Center of the Desert in Palm Springs, Bekki Lorton. They are a nonbinary person who shares their experiences on the path of self-discovery and self-love. In addition to doing community work at The Center, Bekki also worked with exotic animals in a zoo. Learn more about Bekki and their work here: https://thecentercv.org/en/about-us/our-people/bekki-lorton/ . If you have a story or insight relevant to the work of Transgender Woman Talking, and would be willing to sit for an interview, please reach out to Elle at twatpodcasting@gmail.com. . To learn more about therapy with Elle, please visit her website at: ⁠www.estherloewen.com⁠ and click on "Therapy".

This episode concludes (for now) Elle's series asking the question about gender identity, Am I Transgender? This final episode again will work just fine on its own but will be best absorbed in the context of the previous six (linked below). In it, Elle talks about the Erin in the Morning's fabulous response to a transphobic hit piece published by the New York Times this last week. She also reflects on themes of intersex experiences, HRT as an experiment, the persistence of Gender Dysphoria over the years, and the collective weight of all the little "signs" along the way. If you have a story or insight relevant to the work of Transgender Woman Talking, and would be willing to sit for an interview, please reach out to Elle at the email address listed below. . Previous episodes in the series: Am I Transgender? (Part 1) - https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/twatpodcast/episodes/Am-I-Transgender-e1r3df3/a-a8tfsck Am I Transgender? (Part 2) - https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/twatpodcast/episodes/Am-I-Transgender--Part-2-e1t0hp9/a-a94fg40 Am I Transgender? (Part 3) - https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/twatpodcast/episodes/Am-I-Transgender--Part-3-e1v9592/a-a9c8939 Am I Transgender? (Part 4) - https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/twatpodcast/episodes/Am-I-Transgender--Part-4-e23bj4a/a-a9ouuq2 Am I Transgender? (Part 5) - https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/twatpodcast/episodes/Am-I-Transgender--Part-5-e26pv66 Am I Transgender (Part 6) - https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/twatpodcast/episodes/Am-I-Transgender--Part-6-e2a637f . Reach out to Elle at the following email address: twatpodcasting@gmail.com with constructive feedback, questions, or connection :) To learn more about therapy with Elle, please visit her website at: www.estherloewen.com and click on "Therapy".

Elle this week reflects on the stress of existing as a trans person (and more generally a minority person) in the world today. She talks about the weight of discouragement and hopelessness that some trans people get covered by, and why it shows up for us. Among other themes, Elle recommends the work by Erin in the Morning who tracks anti transgender legislation in the United States (read with caution because the facts can be depressing). In addition, she references the concept of Minority Stress which is widely considered a significant stress factor by medical providers. She closes with some practical tips for managing the Impending Doom including a recommendation for those who are able to write your representatives (check out this guide). Elle has therapy openings available!! If you are in the State of California and looking for (or know someone who is) a therapist to work with on a virtual basis, please reach out. Elle is an Associate Marriage and Family Therapist (AMFT#142998), Supervised by Traci Lowenthal, PsyD (CA#22910). She currently accepts private pay only, but has a few sliding scale spots available for those who are in financial difficulty. As always, Elle welcomes your constructive feedback, questions, and friendly connection. Send your message to twatpodcasting@gmail.com.

In this episode, Elle reflects about a conversation she had with educators and medical providers at Loma Linda University, a Seventh-day Adventist college and hospital in southern california. The table talk itself was not recorded, but Elle brings her report before, immediately after, and in retrospect of what happened. What she had erroneously thought of as an interview or panel discussion prior turned out to be an intimate chat with a group of empathetic educators, many or most of whom were allies. The group is exploring a book published by Baker Academic, exploring four contrasting Christian theological interpretations of transgender identities (link to book). Warning, for people with religious trauma, and for transgender people from Christian backgrounds, this book features some incredibly hostile messaging that could be equated with hate speech. For this reason, Elle cannot recomend it, even though she resonated with Justin Sabia-Tanis' and Megan Defranza's contributions. Additional recommended resources on the intersection between Christianity and LGBTQ people include: Trans-Gender by Justin Sabia-Tanis Dazzling Darkness by Rachel Mann Transforming by Austen Hartke Take Back The Word by Goss and West (out of print) Work by Marcella Althous-Reid including Trans/Formations Bad Theology Kills by Kevin Garcia As always, please reach out to Elle at twatpodcasting@gmail.com with your constructive feedback and affirmations. Soon, Elle will be open for seeing clients looking for psychotherapy in the State of California. Stay tuned!

In this first episode of 2024, Elle interviews a fellow transgender sister, Wendy Cole. Wendy is a transition coach and elder in our community. She speaks about her experiences coming out of the closet as a child in the mid 20th century, what life was like for trans people in the 80s and 90s, and how things changed after 2012. Wendy's wisdom and kindness bleed through the whole episode, you're not going to want to miss this one! Learn more about Wendy Cole, and connect with her on her website: https://wendycolegtm.net/ She also was interviewed by the Huffington Post in the last couple years: https://www.huffpost.com/entry/gender-affirmation-surgery_n_5bb3a27be4b0d1ebe0e568f0 Wendy's story is resonant of some of the themes highlighted amongst transgender people in the FX Series Pose (link here). As always, reach out to Elle at twatpodcasting@gmail.com with your constructive criticism, questions, and future guests to interview.

Elle talks about the voices of doubt and self-hate and transphobia that rattle around in our heads -- where they may have come from, and how she navigates them in the present. She reflects on a conversation she once had with Rachel Freemon Sowers (of Road to Radical Visibility) about people's projections on us, in addition to her work in the therapy world. Among other themes, this program includes exploration of distorted thought patterns, DBT (Dialectical Behavioral Therapy), CBT (cognitive Behavioral Therapy), and trauma work. Please reach out to Elle with ideas and constructive feedback at twatpodcasting@gmail.com

For this week's episode, Elle shares a lecture she gave for SDA Kinship's 42nd annual Kampmeeting held in Riverside, California. Her lecture was given to a small audience of queer Christians in a hotel conference room. The lecture features her reflections on queer and chosen families, the imperfections amongst families, the ways in which we survive, and how to build thriving communities that can help us love well. Please reach out to Elle with your constructive feedback at twatpodcasting@gmail.com

This week on the program, Elle interviews the founder and leader of Patchwork, a network of mutual support communities for and by transgender people. In the episode, Stephanie reflects on her own personal journey with gender, some of the key experiences that shaped her, and what she gives her heart and soul to today. In addition, she also discusses the importance of building networks of love for our survival as transgender people. Learn more about Stephanie's background in crisis support and emergency services, and how these skills have influenced the creation of Patchwork. https://www.transpatchwork.org/ As always, reach out to Elle with constructive questions or feedback at twatpodcasting@gmail.com.

During this episode, Elle reflects on some of her experiences with intersecting aspects of marginalization, as well as with enjoying privilege. She highlights the AWIS map of intersecting oppressions and privileges (click here), as well as similar diagrams from Sylvia Duckworth (click here). She talks about how she grew from dismissing systemic racism as an adolescent to becoming antiracist as an adult. In addition, she also invites a call to action for those of us who enjoy aspects of privilege in our lives today. Some of the books and ideas mentioned include: The New Jim Crown by Michelle Alexander - https://newjimcrow.com/ Ibram X Kendi's books, "How to be Anti-Racist" and "Stamped" - https://www.ibramxkendi.com/books "Trans Like Me" by CN Lester For this week's show, the question has to do with your commitment to work toward the cause of inclusion and justice. How are you giving yourself to this work today? How would you like to make the world a safer and more beautiful place for all people? What is one way you can commit to the work of justice? Reach out to Elle with your comments and feedback at twatpodcasting@gmail.com

Mass media portrayals of trans lives can often be downers -- this podcast is no exception. The reality of living as transgender in a transphobic, cissexist, and heterosexist world is that suffering is nearly unavoidable. However, most of us who transition and live our lives authentically do so with the expectation of, and experience of genuine joy. In this episode, Elle discusses some of the ways in which the trans experience has brought her beauty and light. Please reach out to Elle at the show's email address: twatpodcasting@gmail.com - and please share with her your experiences of trans joy.

This episode continues Elle's series asking the question about gender identity, Am I Transgender? This edition stands alone but is probably best absorbed in the context of the previous five (linked below). Elle talks about the spiritual nature of her transition, and how she made sense of it as someone who believes in the divine, the camaraderie she experienced meeting and hearing the stories of other trans people, and the professional medical consensus on her personal case. Additional themes in this episode of Transgender Woman Talking include: support groups, the DSM-V, the WPATH, Kate Bowler and her book "The Lives We Actually Have", conversion therapy or reparative therapy, gaslighting, gatekeeping, code language, and medical procedures. . Previous episodes in the series: Am I Transgender? (Part 1) - https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/twatpodcast/episodes/Am-I-Transgender-e1r3df3/a-a8tfsck Am I Transgender? (Part 2) - https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/twatpodcast/episodes/Am-I-Transgender--Part-2-e1t0hp9/a-a94fg40 Am I Transgender? (Part 3) - https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/twatpodcast/episodes/Am-I-Transgender--Part-3-e1v9592/a-a9c8939 Am I Transgender? (Part 4) - https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/twatpodcast/episodes/Am-I-Transgender--Part-4-e23bj4a/a-a9ouuq2 Am I Transgender? (Part 5) - https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/twatpodcast/episodes/Am-I-Transgender--Part-5-e26pv66 . Reach out to Elle at the following email address: twatpodcasting@gmail.com with constructive feedback, questions, or connection :)

In this week's episode, Elle tackles a question submitted by a listener about the mental and emotional effects of hormone replacement therapy. Discussions about the physical bodily results of HRT are discussed ad-nauseum on forums like Reddit, but sometimes the subtle impacts that take place between our ears are lost in the shuffle. For many trans people, some of the most palpable changes through transition happen in the mind, and no doubt in part due to hormones therapy. Because she is transfeminine, this conversation centers on the impacts of progesterone and estrogen on folks assigned male at birth (and not on transmasculine folks who use testosterone). This episode discusses both positive, negative, surprising, and expected results of this regimen, as well as how she received access living in the United States. Some of the topics included are: sexuality and sex drive, emotion regulation, politics and equitable access, second puberty, side-effects, and joy. As always, please reach out to Elle at twatpodcasting@gmail.com to offer your constructive feedback, and ask questions. Trans siblings and allies, you are not alone ❤️

In this week's episode, Elle discusses Laurie Frankel's 2017 book "This Is How It Always Is", now in its second printing from Flatiron Books. The book is a novel about a family with a trans young person, and the trials and travails they all go through navigating a transphobic heterosexist cissexist world. In the episode, Elle discusses some of her reflections on the book, the points that resonate with her own experience and that of her clients. She also talks a little about the pressure that trans people face from cis people to fit into a box, any box whatsoever. The show also explores the experience of validation, and how our human need to feel un-alone may unwittingly press people to self-identify in ways that are ultimately not productive. Finally, she discusses the challenges of parenting; and the ways in which it often ends up being a repeated leap of faith. . As always, please reach out to the producer/director/host/editor/marketer of Transgender Woman Talking at twatpodcasting@gmail.com

This episode is a recording of Elle's most recent creative work, a sermon given at Paradox Church in Redlands, a congregation that is enthusiastically affirming of LGBTQ people, anti-racist, and feminist. Elle's friend Craig is the lead pastor of the church and has invited her several times now to speak to the community. Paradox Church follows the Revised Common Lectionary and as such, Elle took her marching orders on the passage for the week from that document. Matthew 18:15-20 was the gospel reading for this week, and as she discusses in the lecture, is fraught with problems over the course of Christian history. In the coming weeks, Elle will follow up on some of these concepts, expanding them specifically for transgender people, and explaining more candidly some of the elements that were left out. You may also watch a video recording of this lecture at Paradox Church's youtube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xywt-H0Cr_c As always, send Elle an email at twatpodcasting@gmail.com. Stay tuned for future full length episodes :)

Elle talks about a small ministry based out of her previous denomination, and some of the harmful messages it espouses about queer folks. She discusses and unpleasant online interaction with former ministry colleagues, and her unvarnished responses to their messages. The episode also touches on the following themes and resources: Religious Fundamentalism Trusting Your Intuition The positive impacts of transition on mental health (see: this article, and this study). Gaslighting The Film Pray Away, and Exodus International Out Love, a book by Julie Rogers And the blessing of the divine on queer people of faith Please reach out with constructive feedback on the show -- as well as your opinions about which new logo draft should be used as the template for the final (click here for options) -- twatpodcasting@gmail.com. Watch out for the upcoming live recorded episode on YouTube, September 10.

Elle talks about her experience over the course of the last year, publishing Transgender Woman Talking Podcast weekly. She reflects on what she's learned about the weekly discipline of creating, regrets about the past and fears about the future, and hopes for how the program will continue to unfold. In addition, Elle invites some feedback from you both on an upcoming logo change to the show, content in future episodes, guest interview choices, and overall tone. Please take a look at the poll in the Spotify version of this podcast episode. Vote for your opinions on future episodes. Please visit Elle's website to look at the logo mockups - send her an email with your opinion on the best concept to refine -- www.estherloewen.com/twat-logo On September 10, a Sunday, Elle will host a live recording of that week's show on YouTube Live. Watch for updates and a marker for the premiere at the Transgender Woman Talking YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@transgenderwomantalking/ As always, your constructive feedback and suggestions are coveted. Please email twatpodcasting@gmail.com.

In this episode, Elle discusses her personality trait of people pleasing, a set of behaviors not uncommon to trans people. She reflects on the sources of this characteristic from her background in religion, and at home, exploring how the interplay of environment and genetics likely produced it. Among other themes, Elle talks about getting our needs met, finding our voice, spinning the truth, losing identity, manspreading, and the Enneagram. She also discusses an upcoming change in logo for the show. If you have thoughts or feedback on that, or on the program in general, please reach out to: twatpodcasting@gmail.com

Elle takes a stab at reflecting on the movie everyone is talking about - and seeing! In the program she discusses the patriarchy, and gender-based hierarchies in general, asking "How does patriarchy affect trans people?" She also explores some of the overt and covert trans themes in the film, and how the experience of femininity and womanhood expressed in the film is shared by her and her trans siblings. Some of the resources mentioned include: Billie Eilish's song "What was I made For?" - watch the youtube music video here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cW8VLC9nnTo An article with Hari Nef and Them Magazine: https://www.them.us/story/hari-nef-barbie-trans-representation Another great piece in Collider reflecting on Hari Nef's inclusion and representation in the movie: https://collider.com/hari-nef-barbie/ As always, reach out to Elle with questions or ideas or constructive feedback at: twatpodcasting@gmail.com

Elle reflects on the current political conversations surrounding trans people and access to gender-affirming medical care -- which often hinges upon cisgender people's worries about regret. She talks about what the research says about detransition and regret, which is far less common than often portrayed by homophobic haters. Elle discussed and pointed to some excellent work by Lexi Henny (click here) and Erin in the Morning (click here). The most robust published literature review on the subject appears to be by Bustos et al. (2021) - you can read it here on the NIH website. Reach out at twatpodcasting@gmail.com. And please stay tuned for next week's (on time) show.

Elle talks about her experience with doubt as it relates to gender identity, and transition. She reflects on the cultural pressures prevailing on trans people to "get it right" as well as the personal consequences that come to us when we pretend to know it all in whatever sense. Some of the themes touched in this episode include: passing as a transgender person, finding partners, cultural gaslighting, incorrect assumptions about trans narratives, TERF ideology, the bimodal spectrum of gender and sex characteristics, lonliness, learning and performing gender, imposter syndrome, Lizzo, and a sermon about doubt. Elle references the following media items in this episode: Lizzo's song "Like a Girl" - https://youtu.be/z_xCVttXLm0 Julia Serano and the Bimodal Spectrum - https://rationalwiki.org/wiki/Intrinsic_Inclinations_Model A great piece about doubt by an affirming and inclusive theologian, Peter Enns - The Sin of Certainty - https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/25816844 How Beautiful We Were - a novel by Imbolo Mbue - https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/51794532 Please reach out to Elle at her email address: twatpodcasting@gmail.com with constructive feedback and suggestions. This episode will be available later in the week on the Transgender Woman Talking YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@transgenderwomantalking/videos

Elle continues her series, "Am I transgender?", a question most trans people will ask themselves over the course of their lives (and sometimes, rarely, cisgender people as well). In this episode, she talks about three primary themes that are elements of her answer to the inquiry. New dysphoria that emerges after transition begins, Elle's personal sense of mission and its connection to her transition, and the mysterious and even mystical timing of details lining up. . This episode will be published on the Transgender Woman Talking YouTube channel. Please check the feed this week: https://www.youtube.com/@transgenderwomantalking/videos . Previous episodes in the series: Am I Transgender? (Part 1) - https://spotifyanchor-web.app.link/e/bha9xLj2zxb Am I Transgender? (Part 2) - https://spotifyanchor-web.app.link/e/p4lEXJj2zxb Am I Transgender? (Part 3) - https://spotifyanchor-web.app.link/e/SfBEQOENszb Am I Transgender? (Part 4) - https://spotifyanchor-web.app.link/e/eRv9RCdKkBb . Reach out to Elle at the following email address: twatpodcasting@gmail.com

Elle talks about some aspects of living with a disability, and whether or not trans identities or Gender Dysphoria should be considered as such. The episode begins with a reflection on the brilliant 2020 documentary "Crip Camp" which is now available on Netflix (click here). It continues with exploration of the ways in which transgender identities do not resemble disability. Elle talks about Ableism, Mark Yarhouse's Christian conception of disability as a framework for gender dysphoria, and finally she puts on her pastor hat and tells an old Bible story.

This week's episode is a re-broadcast of an interview that Elle gave with Rachel Freemon Sowers, host and producer of Road to Radical Visibility podcast, and marriage and family therapist in California. Learn more about Rachel and her work on her website: https://www.rachelfreemonsowers.com/, on her instagram feed: https://www.instagram.com/rachelfreemonsowers/?hl=en . Rachel's podcast can be heard on all major feeds. Here's the Spotify Link: https://open.spotify.com/show/57vPKJe0Q8Mrx4Hvd6RC4s

During this pride month, Elle offers some unsolicited advice to allies (or would-be allies) out there wishing to improve support of their trans loved ones. This episode is a bit of a continuation from the last one where Elle talked with her wife about how spouses navigate having a partner transition. Some of the themes touched on in this episode include pronoun use, the politicization of transgender people, voting, women's spaces, gender-coded activities, makeup, intersecting identities, and talking behind our backs. Thank you as always for listening, and please reach out to twatpodcasting@gmail.com to connect with Elle and/or offer constructive feedback.

Many of the listeners of Transgender Woman Talking Podcast are cisgender partners of trans people, or other allies. In this week's episode, Elle is joined by her wife of 18 years, Paige, to talk about the experience of a spouse going through transition with their partner. Paige gives advice to cisgender partners out there, and offers some insight and hope on the process. Themes in this episode include relationship dynamics, communication, getting support outside the family, going to therapy, and how transition changes us for the better. . Some of the resources mentioned in the episode include an interview that Paige did earlier with Esther Lemmons of Fifty Shades of Gender podcast, a remarkable show about gender exploration. Click here: https://www.fiftyshadesofgender.com/paige/ . In addition, once again, Elle is recommending Amanda Jette Knox's book, Love lives here: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/566534/love-lives-here-by-amanda-jette-knox/ . Finally, the two referenced the Code Orange Podcast (Paige's show about healthcare) - Part 1 and Part 2 with Elle talking about her work as a therapist, and Paige's relationship to her. https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/7-esther-loewen-transgender-therapy-student-part-1/id1573486174?i=1000568128670 https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/8-esther-loewen-transgender-therapy-student-part-2/id1573486174?i=1000570503205 . As always, reach out with comments and constructive feedback at twatpodcasting@gmail.com

Elle talks about her experiences with Pride and Pride month. Pride has drawbacks and great benefits, effective effects as well as impotent ones. Recently, a Reddit post discussed some of the disappointments we collectively experience when it comes to pride -- Elle adds her own voice to that conversation. She reflects on the political conversations surrounding trans people currently, including laws championed by Ron DeSantis, abusive relationships, shame and self-respect, spiritual rituals, and creating community. Among other themes discussed in the episode, Elle talks about: Transgender History by Susan Stryker Past Transgender Woman Talking episodes on Visibility Email Elle with questions and feedback at: twatpodcasting@gmail.com Watch YouTube videos of many of the show's episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@transgenderwomantalking/videos

Elle discusses her personal reactions to the novel "Mad Honey" written by Jodi Picoult and Jennifer Finney Boyland (click here for Amazon listing). The book was published late in 2022 and has received many positive reviews, as well as some irrational hate by "aNti wOkE" warriors. In the episode, Elle offers her reflections on reading the novel, and ideas that it brought to mind along the way. . Subjects discussed include: Transgender portrayals in the media The films Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, The Crying Game, Silence of the Lambs, Mrs. Doubtfire, and Boys Don't Cry Gay Panic Defense: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gay_panic_defense "Nothing About Us Without Us" and the film Crip Camp. . As always, your feedback and constructive advice is welcome via email at: twatpodcasting@gmail.com. Watch the show on YouTube, where many episodes are published in video form: https://www.youtube.com/@transgenderwomantalking/videos

On this week's new episode, Elle reflects on endings, beginnings, graduations, rites of passage, and the nature of change for human beings. This one is out a couple days late due to graduation ceremonies that she participated in over the weekend -- finishing her degree to become a licensed psychotherapist. . As always, thank you for listening, reviewing, rating, and sending your constructive feedback to: twatpodcasting@gmail.com

This week's episode is the first re-run of the program's history. This one was originally published back in October of 2022 and is one of the most popular of the 40 or so editions now out in the feed. Elle will be back next week with a fresh one. . Should I transition? This is a question a lot of trans people ask themselves at one time or another. The answer might seem obvious -- and it is for some people -- but it often is a little more complex. Elle talks about the process she went through to make sense of this choice. She reflects on support she received (like ⁠Dara Hoffman Fox's book on Gender Identity⁠ exploration) along the way, as well as the spirituality of the transgender experience. Other resources important during this time included: ⁠Love Lives Here by⁠ Amanda Jette Knox and ⁠Dazzling Darkness⁠ by Rachel Mann.  . Please share your feedback and ideas for the program to: twatpodcasting@gmail.com

Elle discusses the practice (or habit) of avoidance as a coping mechanism for stress. The term, "Ostrich Effect" is sometimes derided in pop-psychology circles as disordered avoidance or dissociation. But she argues that there are times in which it can be effective and even constructive for surviving. In the episode, Elle refers to the current political climate and social conversations around LGBTQ people, and the proposed legislation aimed at our community. She likewise discusses input from listeners from the show, including Quinn! . This week's episode was videoed and will be available on Elle's YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@transgenderwomantalking/videos . Please take a minute to rate and review the program, or email Elle directly at: twatpodcasting@gmail.com

Elle continues the series asking the question, "Am I transgender?", an inquiry that comes to the forefront of trans people's mind at some point in their lives or another (or repeatedly). In this iteration of the series, Elle talks about looking at herself in the mirror, disassociation from thoughts and feelings, grieving the childhood and young adulthood I wish I'd had, my willingness to suffer, and so-called gender euphoria. . Previous episodes in the series: Am I Transgender? (Part 1) - https://spotifyanchor-web.app.link/e/bha9xLj2zxb Am I Transgender? (Part 2) - https://spotifyanchor-web.app.link/e/p4lEXJj2zxb Am I Transgender? (Part 3) - https://spotifyanchor-web.app.link/e/SfBEQOENszb . The Cornell meta-analysis study on the benefits of transition: https://whatweknow.inequality.cornell.edu/topics/lgbt-equality/what-does-the-scholarly-research-say-about-the-well-being-of-transgender-people/ . Julia Serano's book Whipping Girl can be purchased anywhere books are sold. Check out the author's blog here: https://www.juliaserano.com/ . Transgender Woman Talking YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@transgenderwomantalking/videos . Reach out to Elle at the following email address: twatpodcasting@gmail.com

Elle solves the question of the ages (/s) for TWaT listeners this week on the show as she tackles the conundrum of how people change in their lives. Among her reflections on this enormous topic include mentions of her therapeutic approach as studied in her Masters therapy program from Alliant University, Father Richard Rohr's "Falling Upwards" (click here), Julia Serano's "Sexed Up" (click here), and many other fun little nuggets. As has become commonplace, this episode will be shared in video form on Elle's YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@transgenderwomantalking Email Elle at TWaTpodcasting@gmail.com with any questions, suggestions, or constructive advice :) Please take a moment to rate and review the show, it helps folks to find the work that Elle is doing.

Elle brings you along with her on a trip back to her hometown. Some of her friends share their words of wisdom on the program, and Elle squeezes in a bit of sightseeing in between bouts of homework wrestling. A theme that seems to emerge during this Travelogue episode is Elle's feelings about fitting in (or not), and what it means to be home. . Photos of this week's trip: https://www.amazon.com/photos/shared/9VjrRJp6ScSbaN-oA-wrIg.I_X4iBb0CYPN999f4jyxQn . Pink and Black Pen Pals program for incarcerated LGBTQ people - https://blackandpinkpenpals.org/ . Record a message to me! https://anchor.fm/twatpodcast/message . As always, you can watch most episodes on YouTube (but not this one) - https://www.youtube.com/@transgenderwomantalking/videos . Reach out via email at twatpodcasting@gmail.com

Elle dips her toes into the conversation about Trans Exclusionary Radical Feminists (TERFs) and JK Rowling and her new podcast, The Witch Trials of JK Rowling. She reflects on her internal impulses to condemn and empathize with folks like Rowling -- as well as the strangely validating experience of not being seen, trusted, or heard. Elle refers to Julia Serano's famous Trans Woman Manifesto from her book Whipping Girl as well as the 2022 novel Lessons In Chemistry by Bonnie Garmus. She also references the concept of cancel culture, as well as some of the brands that LGBTQ people reject like Chick-fil-A. This episode will be available on YouTube at Elle's channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/transgenderwomantalking Please email with any constructive feedback, affirmations, or suggestions :) twatpodcasting@gmail.com

Elle talks about things that scared her before she began transitioning; things that froze her into inaction. She reflects on the ways in which fear holds us back, and also about how it can show us the way to courage. This episode touches on so-called "imposter syndrome", Pandora's Box, the validity of transition as a "treatment" for gender dysphoria, the financial and social impacts of gender transition, passing, internalized transphobia, and the ways in which transgender women are often viewed suspiciously as predators in waiting. . Transgender Woman Talking is available on YouTube in video form - https://www.youtube.com/@transgenderwomantalking/featured . The song Elle referenced about brave fucking women - "Ice Cream Man" by RAYE - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ywunlu42_ho . Cornell University Meta-analysis on the success rates and satisfaction of medical care for gender transition - https://whatweknow.inequality.cornell.edu/topics/lgbt-equality/what-does-the-scholarly-research-say-about-the-well-being-of-transgender-people/ . Gender Rebels Podcast - https://genderrebels.podbean.com/e/am-i-transgender-enough/ . Elle's book about keeping secrets - https://www.amazon.com/Hidden-Secrets-Hold-Launch-Forward/dp/1737778807 . #transgender #transpodcast #transition #lgbtq #transisbeautiful #transwoman #lgbtqtherapy #lgbtqia #transtherapist #twat #twatpodcast #transgenderwomantalking

This week, Elle reflects on some of the implications of Trans Day of Visibility. She talks about the benefits and drawbacks keeping secrets (or even maintaining privacy), and the many reasons why trans people may choose to hide aspects of their identities. One of the bits of media Elle references is the documentary "Paris is Burning" (1990) - read more about it here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paris_I...) This episode is based loosely on material Elle will present for a lecture at San Jacinto College in early April. Your constructive feedback and suggestions are welcome. Reply in the comments or send an email to: twatpodcasting@GMAIL.COM. Elle briefly references her book, "Hidden: Why Secrets Hold You Back and Launch You Forward", which dropped during the summer of 2021, just prior to her coming out. The book is published in her birth name, and is available for purchase on Amazon and via her website (www.estherloewen.com). As always, the podcast is available on youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHIwunUfX0Rl8gzk2Pm2Ntw Please leave a rating and review for the show if you haven't done so yet! . #transition #transgrief #grief #griefjourney #grieving #transgender #transgenderwoman #transwoman #transpastor #lgbtq #lgbtqtherapy #lgbtqia #transisbeautiful #transtherapist #therapy

Elle talks about the ways in which transition conjures the experience of grief. Quoting the work of Edith Eder (https://schizanthusnerd.com/2020/07/26/the-gift, she reflects on her life experiences with grief, some of the things she has lost in transition, and the mystical way in which grief transmutes to gratitude given enough time and magic. Elle references numerous other episodes of the podcast in this one, as well as the fact that most of the Transgender Woman Talking Podcast is available in video form on YouTube (check out Elle's channel here: https://www.youtube.com/@transgenderwomantalking ) Thanks for listening! Reach out with constructive comments and high fives at: twatpodcasting@gmail.com