Proxy with Yowei Shaw

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In life, sometimes we have a unique experience that leaves us with big emotional questions. And sometimes, there’s no one around us who can answer our questions. Each episode, host Yowei Shaw (formerly of NPR's Invisibilia) connects a guest with the “proxies” they need - experts and strangers with shared experience. Not an advice show and definitely not therapy, Proxy offers something different: a space for people to confront, commiserate and even find the comedy (or cringe) through frank conversation. Episode art by Good Tape Studio. Theme music by the mysterious Breakmaster Cylinder. Proxy is a proudly independent production. To support the show and get exclusive bonus episodes and other goodies, go to patreon.com/proxypodcast. Other ways you can support: Rate and review us on Apple Podcasts! That stuff matters apparently.Follow us on Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, and Twitter for updates, BTS, and shenanigans.Subscribe to the podcast on your favorite podcast platform.Share with loved ones and spread the word! We don't have a marketing budget and rely on word of mouth.

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    • Apr 22, 2025 LATEST EPISODE
    • monthly NEW EPISODES
    • 36m AVG DURATION
    • 20 EPISODES
    • 1 SEASONS


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    Latest episodes from Proxy with Yowei Shaw

    Bisexual Wife Guy

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 22, 2025 53:13


    The case of the bisexual wife guy who got dumped. In this episode, we find a proxy to stand in for a listener's ex - another queer woman who left her straight relationship. From the episode:  Hanna Rosin is a journalist and the host of many podcasts, including Radio Atlantic (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/radio-atlantic/id1258635512) and chutzpod! (www.chutzpod.com) Follow Hanna on X @hannarosin and Instagram @hannarosin ---------------------------------Proxy is an independent podcast and we rely on listeners. To support emotional investigative journalism™️ and help the show keep going, consider joining our Patreon: patreon.com/proxypodcast. You'll get ad-free episodes and exclusive bonus interviews.Sign up for our free newsletter: proxypodcast.substack.comFollow us on Instagram: @proxypodcast @yoweishawGet in touch at proxythepod@gmail.com

    The Utility of Self-Delusion (and Big Show Update)

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 19, 2025 17:59


    Yowei shares exciting show news and goes on a self-delusion bender with the team at Proxy HQ. Is she being delusional? Or is delusion just necessary for starting any new project?From the episode:  Useful Delusions: The Power & Paradox of the Self-Deceiving Brain, by Shankar Vedantam: www.hiddenbrain.org/books Radiotopia from PRX: www.radiotopia.fm Episode credits:  Produced by Yowei Shaw Edited by John DeLore Mixed by Kyle Pulley  To help this independent show exist, consider joining our Patreon: patreon.com/proxypodcast. You'll get our newsletter and exclusive monthly bonus episodes. Follow us on Instagram: @proxypodcast @yoweishaw Get in touch at proxythepod@gmail.com

    Presenting: Alternate Realities (from NPR's Embedded)

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 6, 2025 35:47


    Conspiracy theories have been gaining traction all the way to the highest seats of power. So, are there emotional dynamics at play that we could understand to be able to do something about it?  Last year, Zach Mack's dad sent him a strange email, asking to bet $10,000 to settle once and for all who was correct and who was the brainwashed one.   From NPR's Embedded podcast, this is episode 2 of the Alternate Realities series: Down the Rabbit Hole.    From the episode:  Listen to the rest of the Alternate Realities series from NPR's Embedded here: www.npr.org/podcasts/510311/embedded Follow Zach Mack's work: www.zachmack.org

    Presenting: "Stings for Our Enemies. Honey for Our Friends." (from Our Ancestors Were Messy)

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 26, 2025 66:57


    For as long as she can remember, Nichole Hill has had a complicated relationship with Black history. Then in 2020, she stumbled on a digital archive of pre Civil Rights era Black newspapers and got obsessed with the scandalous stories she found. Our Ancestors Were Messy is her new podcast that explores Black history through the lens of gossip and drama. In this episode, Nichole tells the story of a Victorian era love triangle that rocked the elites of DC.    From the episode:  Nichole Hill is an audio show-runner, writer, and the host and creator of Our Ancestors Were Messy and The Secret Adventures of Black People. Find out more about Nichole here: www.nicholelhill.com Listen to Our Ancestors Were Messy wherever you get your podcasts You can support the show by becoming a member: ourancestorsweremessy.supercast.com Follow Nichole Hill on Instagram @nicholewthanh Proxy listener survey: bit.ly/proxysurvey

    Presenting: I felt too seen. Um, dragged. (from Basket Case), Plus an Upade

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 6, 2025 38:44


    Basket Case is a new show about mental health. In this episode, host Nicole Kelly takes on perfectionism, an issue that Yowei has personally struggled with. Plus, some breaking news about Proxy.   If you'd like to support the making of S1 of Proxy, go to patreon.com/proxypodcast. You'll get access to our free newsletter and exclusive monthly bonus episodes. This month, Yowei talks to Nicole Kelly about their relationships with perfectionism and how having forced fun and a punk rock attitude have helped them creatively survive.   Episode credits:  Basket Case is a show from Molten Heart and iHeart Podcasts, created and executive produced by Jasmine JT Green, and hosted by Nicole Kelly.    You can listen to Basket Case on all podcast platforms: https://www.iheart.com/podcast/1119-basket-case-217055280/   Produced by Kim Nederveen Pieterse. Nik LeBlanc, and Yowei Shaw, mixed by Kyle Pulley

    Presenting: An Evil Man (from Little Devils), Plus a Year-End Recap

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 30, 2024 46:13


    When Yowei heard about the new podcast Little Devils, she was like: finally, someone being honest about a thing we all do. On Little Devils, Jasmin Bauomy interrogates the snap judgments she makes of other people, to find the story behind that annoying thing they do.  In this episode, we share a story from Little Devils and we toast 2024 with a year-end recap.    From the episode:  Listen to the full season of Little Devils on all platforms: https://pod.link/1783097137 Support their Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/littledevils  Follow @littledevilsshow and @jasminbauomy on Instagram and BlueSky   Episode credits:  Produced by Yowei Shaw, Kim Nederveen Pieterse,and Nik LeBlanc Mixed by Kyle Pulley   Proxy is a completely independent production. To support the show and get exclusive bonus episodes, go to patreon.com/proxypodcast.    Follow us on Instagram: @proxypodcast @yoweishaw   Get in touch at proxythepod@gmail.com

    #10 The Group That Gets It

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 3, 2024 53:49


    The story of someone who suffered alone in secret for 8 years with a problem he was too afraid to Google -  and then he stumbled into a support group. In this episode, we dive into the emotional dynamics of support groups with Jason Yu. Why did support groups help him, when nothing else did?   From the episode:  Fidget Podcast - Jason Yu's support group in podcast form for people who compulsively pick their skin, pull their hair, bite their nails Follow the Fidget Podcast on Instagram   The TLC Foundation - an organization for body-focused repetitive behaviors   The Art of Gathering and How We Show Up: Jason's book recs for learning how to build community and gather   Episode credits:  Produced by Yowei Shaw Edited by John DeLore Mixed by Kyle Pulley   Proxy is a completely independent production. To support the show and get exclusive bonus episodes and our newsletter, go to patreon.com/proxypodcast.    Follow us on Instagram: @proxypodcast @yoweishaw   Get in touch at proxythepod@gmail.com

    #9 Is there anything we can actually do about polarization?

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 29, 2024 43:48


    Whoever wins the election, Americans will still want to rip each other's heads off. Social psychologist Jay Van Bavel helps us understand why we should care about polarization, how we got here, and what, if anything, we can do about it.    From the episode:  Jay Van Bavel is a social psychologist at New York University and the author of The Power of Us: Harnessing Our Shared Identities to Improve Performance, Increase Cooperation, and Promote Social Harmony: https://www.powerofus.online/ The paper on political sectarianism Jay co-wrote: https://www.jayvanbavel.com/_files/ugd/9c6579_b289e58eb65b461aa67c03f4cc5d4804.pdf Follow Jay on X and Instagram: @jayvanbavel   Episode credits: Produced by Yowei Shaw, with help from Anakaren Santana Edited by Tim Howard Mixed by Kyle Pulley   Proxy is a completely independent production. To support the show and get exclusive bonus episodes and our newsletter, go to patreon.com/proxypodcast.    Follow us on Instagram: @proxypodcast @yoweishaw   Rate and review us on Apple Podcasts! That stuff matters apparently.

    #8 So Many Tears, But What Do They Say?

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 26, 2024 23:17


    After Yowei got laid off, she kept finding herself trying not to cry in front of other people — and failing. In the episode, Yowei talks to Heather Christle, the author of The Crying Book, to parse what's happening in that moment, what tears are saying and how we should respond to them.      From the episode: Heather Christle is a poet and professor at Emory University. She has a new book coming out in March called In the Rhododendrums: A Memoir with Appearances by Virginia Wolf. It's available for preorder in all the usual places. You can follow Heather on Twitter and Instagram @heatherchristle.  The Thai Life insurance commerical from our crying experiment     Episode credits: Produced by Yowei Shaw and Kim Nederveen Pieterse Edited by John DeLore Mixed by Kyle Pulley       Proxy is a completely independent production. To support the show and get exclusive bonus episodes and other goodies, go to patreon.com/proxypodcast.       Other ways you can support: Rate and review us on Apple Podcasts! That stuff matters apparently. Follow us on Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, and Twitter for updates, BTS, and shenanigans. Subscribe to the podcast on your favorite podcast platform. Sign up for our free newsletter at patreon.com/proxypodcast. Share with loved ones and spread the word! We don't have a marketing budget and rely on word of mouth.

    Presenting: The Art of Vulnerability and Connection with Mae Martin (from ReThinking)

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 20, 2024 37:28


    Recently, Yowei noticed a pattern among new friends she's making. These friends all make her feel lighter, more playful, and listened to... and they all have a background in improv comedy.    Today, we're sharing an interview that gets inside the head of an improv comedian to see how they connect with other people.    This episode comes from ReThinking, a podcast where organizational psychologist Adam Grant has lively discussions and debates with people about new thoughts and new ways of thinking.    In the interview, Adam talks to comedian Mae Martin about the value of vulnerability in connection and life lessons from the art of improvisation.   Listen to more episodes of ReThinking, here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/rethinking/id1554567118

    Did we make our goal???

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 5, 2024 8:06


    Finally, a campaign reveal. Did we get additional funding to hire Kim for more hours? Plus, some updates for what's in store for Proxy.    Episode credits: Produced by Yowei Shaw and Kim Nederveen Pieterse Mixed by Kyle Pulley   Proxy is a completely independent production. To support the show and get exclusive bonus episodes and other goodies, go to patreon.com/proxypodcast.     Other ways you can support: Rate and review us on Apple Podcasts! That stuff matters apparently. Follow us on Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, and Twitter for updates, BTS, and shenanigans. Subscribe to the podcast on your favorite podcast platform. Sign up for our free newsletter at patreon.com/proxypodcast. Share with loved ones and spread the word! We don't have a marketing budget and rely on word of mouth.

    #7 The Proxy Mystery (Part 4 of 4): Ritual

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 21, 2024 25:08


    The final installment of Yowei's quest to solve the mystery of proxy converations.    In this episode, Yowei talks to a ritual expert and tries explaining what she's learned about proxy conversations to her mom.    From the episode: Michael Norton is a behavior scientist, Harvard Business School professor, and the author of The Ritual Effect: From Habit to Ritual, Harness the Surprising Power of Everyday Actions.  Yowei's unhinged grieving ritual for her layoff: Gold Star (The Layoff Song)   Episode credits: Produced by Yowei Shaw and Kim Nederveen Pieterse Mixed by Kyle Pulley     Proxy is a completely independent production. To support the show and get exclusive bonus episodes and other goodies, go to patreon.com/proxypodcast.     Other ways you can support: Rate and review us on Apple Podcasts! That stuff matters apparently. Follow us on Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, and Twitter for updates, BTS, and shenanigans. Subscribe to the podcast on your favorite podcast platform. Sign up for our free newsletter at patreon.com/proxypodcast. Share with loved ones and spread the word! We don't have a marketing budget and rely on word of mouth.

    #6 The Proxy Mystery (Part 3 of 4): Psychodrama

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 15, 2024 40:13


    Part 3 of Yowei's extremely meta quest to solve the mystery of proxy conversations.    In this episode, Yowei learns about psychodrama, a psychotherapy that has similarities to proxy conversations and used to be a dominant modality in the U.S. and then died. Dr. Scott Giacomucci breaks down the mechanics of proxy conversations and tries his psychodrama techniques on Yowei.    From the episode:  Dr. Scott Giacomucci is an expert in psychodrama and the director of the Phoenix Center for Experiential Trauma Therapy in Media, Pennsylvania.  Download Scott's textbook about psychodrama for free. Follow Scott on YouTube.   Episode credits: Produced by Yowei Shaw and Kim Nederveen Pieterse Mixed by Kyle Pulley     Proxy is a completely independent production. To support the show and get exclusive bonus episodes and other goodies, go to patreon.com/proxypodcast.     Other ways you can support: Rate and review us on Apple Podcasts! That stuff matters apparently. Follow us on Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, and Twitter for updates, BTS, and shenanigans. Subscribe to the podcast on your favorite podcast platform. Sign up for our free newsletter at patreon.com/proxypodcast. Share with loved ones and spread the word! We don't have a marketing budget and rely on word of mouth.      

    #5 The Proxy Mystery (Part 2 of 4): Connor Ratliff's Dead Eyes

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 6, 2024 36:30


    Part 2 of Yowei's quest to solve the mystery of proxy conversations. Why do they work?  How? Can Yowei figure out how to explain the show to people who don't get it?   In this episode, Yowei gets advice from actor, comedian, and proxy conversation expert Connor Ratliff.    Over 20 years ago, Tom Hanks fired Connor from a small role in the HBO mini-series Band of Brothers - apparently for having "dead eyes." But is that really what happened? Connor made a podcast called Dead Eyes to investigate, and had 30 episodes worth of proxy conversations before talking to Tom Hanks himself.    Check out Connor Ratliff's work: Dead Eyes podcast Tiny Dinos podcast The George Lucas Show   Episode credits: Produced by Yowei Shaw and Kim Nederveen Pieterse Mixed by Kyle Pulley     Proxy is a completely independent production. To support the show and get exclusive bonus episodes and other goodies, go to patreon.com/proxypodcast.   Other ways you can support: Rate and review us on Apple Podcasts! That stuff matters apparently. Follow us on Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, and Twitter for updates, BTS, and shenanigans. Subscribe to the podcast on your favorite podcast platform. Sign up for our free newsletter at patreon.com/proxypodcast. Share with loved ones and spread the word! We don't have a marketing budget and rely on word of mouth.

    #4: The Proxy Mystery (part 1 of 4): Restorative Justice

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 24, 2024 61:30


    Yowei has a problem. She's having trouble explaining the show to people who don't get it. She knows proxy conversations work. But why? How?   Part 1 of a 4-part quest to solve the mystery of proxy conversations. Yowei learns about a proxy conversation happening in a completely different context: restorative justice with proxy survivors and offenders.    From the episode: Alissa Ackerman is a criminal justice professor at California State University and the co-founder of Ampersands Restorative Justice. She wrote a book about vicarious restorative justice called Healing from Sexual Violence.   Episode credits: Produced by Yowei Shaw and Kim Nederveen Pieterse Mixed by Kyle Pulley   Proxy is a completely independent production. To support the show and get exclusive bonus episodes and other goodies, go to patreon.com/proxypodcast.   Other ways you can support: Rate and review us on Apple Podcasts! That stuff matters apparently. Follow us on Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, and Twitter for updates, BTS, and shenanigans. Subscribe to the podcast on your favorite podcast platform. Sign up for our free newsletter at patreon.com/proxypodcast. Share with loved ones and spread the word! We don't have a marketing budget and rely on word of mouth.

    Patreon Bonus Teaser: Exploding the Myth of Meritocracy with Ofer Sharone

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 7, 2024 9:16


    Teaser for full-length exclusive bonus episode. An in-depth interview with UMass Amherst sociologist and professor Ofer Sharone about the stigma trap that laid off workers can fall into and how the myth of meritocracy impacts even people who don't think they believe in it. For the full bonus episode, go to patreon.com/proxypodcast.From the episode:Ofer Sharone's book The Stigma TrapProxy is a completely independent production. To support the show and get exclusive bonus episodes and other goodies, go to patreon.com/proxypodcast.Other ways you can support:Rate and review us on Apple Podcasts! That stuff matters apparently.Follow us on Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, and Twitter for updates, BTS, and shenanigans.Subscribe to the podcast on your favorite podcast platform.Sign up for our free newsletter at patreon.com/proxypodcast.Share with loved ones and spread the word! We don't have a marketing budget and rely on word of mouth.

    #3 The Layoff Trilogy, Part 3: HR by Proxy

    Play Episode Listen Later May 23, 2024 50:03


    With every layoff, there's the blackbox of what's really going on behind the scenes. Why did it go down the way it did? Was it really not about your performance, like they told you? How does the layoff list get made anyway?In our inaugural proxy conversation, we connect Miles and Elliot with a proxy HR professional to answer their layoff questions.From the episode:You can listen to original layoff song Gold Star on Tidal and Spotify, and watch the ridiculous layoff interpretive pole dance music video on YouTube. Gold Star was written by Yowei Shaw and Kyle Pulley, produced and mixed by Kyle Pulley of Headroom Studios, The music video was directed, filmed, and edited by Alex Beebe, with art by typobrekkie, and production and costume support from Joanna Solotaroff.Thank you to Catie Maillard for being our proxy HR professional. You can find out more about Catie's work at somehowimanagehr.com, LinkedIn, and TikTok.Episode credits:Produced by Yowei ShawEdited by John DeLoreMixed by Kyle PulleyResearch and reporting support by Kim Nederveen PieterseProxy is a proudly independent production. To support the show and get exclusive bonus episodes and other goodies, go to patreon.com/proxypodcast.Other ways you can support:Rate and review us on Apple Podcasts! That stuff matters apparently. Follow us on Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, and Twitter for updates, BTS, and shenanigans. Subscribe to the podcast on your favorite podcast platform. Sign up for our free newsletter at patreon.com/proxypodcast. Share with loved ones and spread the word! We don't have a marketing budget and rely on word of mouth.

    #2 The Layoff Trilogy, Part 2: Danger Day

    Play Episode Listen Later May 23, 2024 42:51


    Please note: This story contains brief mention of suicidal ideation. If you or someone you know may be considering suicide, contact the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline by dialing 9-8-8, or the Crisis Text Line by texting HOME to 741741.Elliot and Miles loved working at the same company, until the spectre of layoffs came to haunt them.From the episode:Ofer Sharone's book The Stigma TrapEpisode credits:Produced by Yowei ShawEdited by John DeLoreMixed by Kyle PulleyResearch and reporting support by Kim Nederveen PieterseProxy is a proudly independent production. To support the show and get exclusive bonus episodes and other goodies, go to patreon.com/proxypodcast.Other ways you can support:Rate and review us on Apple Podcasts! That stuff matters apparently. Follow us on Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, and Twitter for updates, BTS, and shenanigans. Subscribe to the podcast on your favorite podcast platform. Sign up for our free newsletter at patreon.com/proxypodcast. Share with loved ones and spread the word! We don't have a marketing budget and rely on word of mouth.

    #1 The Layoff Trilogy, Part 1: Layoff Girl

    Play Episode Listen Later May 22, 2024 42:13


    When Yowei Shaw got laid off from NPR, she didn't just feel bad. She was confused by how bad she felt and how long the bad lasted. So Yowei does what she usually does in a situation like this - she reported on her feelings. Then things go left.From the episode:Ofer Sharone's book The Stigma TrapEpisode credits:Produced by Yowei ShawEdited by John DeLoreMixed by Kyle PulleyResearch and reporting support by Kim Nederveen PieterseProxy is a proudly independent production. To support the show and get exclusive bonus episodes and other goodies, go to patreon.com/proxypodcast.Other ways you can support:Rate and review us on Apple Podcasts! That stuff matters apparently. Follow us on Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, and Twitter for updates, BTS, and shenanigans. Subscribe to the podcast on your favorite podcast platform. Sign up for our free newsletter at patreon.com/proxypodcast. Share with loved ones and spread the word! We don't have a marketing budget and rely on word of mouth.

    Welcome to Proxy

    Play Episode Listen Later May 15, 2024 4:06


    Sometimes in life, you have an emotional question that no one in your life can relate to. Maybe you're an introvert who wants to stop feeling resentful of the extroverts in your life? Maybe you've survived prostate cancer and have questions around sex?That's where Proxy comes in. Host Yowei Shaw (formerly of NPR's Invisibilia) connects you for a frank conversation with experts and strangers who have shared experience. In other words, the "proxies" you need.The show launches on May 22 with a 3-part series on the emotional and mental health toll of layoffs. It's the prologue to Proxy.Episode credits:Produced by Yowei ShawEdited by John DeLoreMixed by Kyle PulleyResearch and reporting support by Kim Nederveen PieterseProxy is a proudly independent production. To support the show and get exclusive bonus episodes and other goodies, go to patreon.com/proxypodcast.Other ways you can support:Rate and review us on Apple Podcasts! That stuff matters apparently. Follow us on Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, and Twitter for updates, BTS, and shenanigans. Subscribe to the podcast on your favorite podcast platform. Sign up for our free newsletter at patreon.com/proxypodcast. Share with loved ones and spread the word! We don't have a marketing budget and rely on word of mouth.

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