Sex, Love & Elephants with Dr. Cheryl

Join the waitlist for Cheryl's NEW Free Reboot Your relationship course - coming soon! Together with your partner, learn the steps to transform your relationship, reignite love, improve communication, and embrace sensuality. Say goodbye to procrastination and hello to real, lasting change.  Click here to get on the waitlist and you'll also be notified when the doors to the next session of the Become Passion Program open! “Can meditation make me a better lover?” “Is great sex even possible in a long term relationship?” “Why don't I get horny for my spouse anymore?” This episode of Sex, Love & Elephants is the tenth in a series about the rumored demise of long-term love. I'll be sharing my own expertise on the subject as well as interviewing experts in the field about love, sex, and communication. Dr. Lori Brotto is an internationally recognized leader in sexual health research and has mentored nearly 180 trainees. She has also spent time evaluating psychological interventions for sexual dysfunction and genital pain, which collectively impact ⅓ of women. In recognition of her contributions, she holds a Canada Research Chair in women's sexual health, has received recent awards in mentoring junior faculty, excellent public education through media, book awards, and is listed among the top 2% cited scientists by Stanford/Elsevier. Ready to rate your relationship? Take Cheryl's Passion Quiz today and see how you and your honey rank. In This Episode, You'll Learn: (02:23) On average, we're having far less sex today than we were 20 years ago (05:55) If don't experience overwhelming lust for your spouse anymore, you're totally normal  (10:50) Scheduled sex might not feel romantic, but it's more romantic than no sex at all (22:39) Mindfulness as a practice of being present is extremely useful for sexual satisfaction (36:36) Your relationship is normal if you're only having sex on occasion or even if you're not making love at all (38:46) Today's LoveByte  Curious about Become Passion? Check out testimonials HERE from real couples just like you who have saved their relationships! Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource!  Connect with Dr. Lori Brotto: eSense The Better Sex Through Mindfulness Workbook Better Sex Through Mindfulness by Lori A Brotto Let's Connect!   Follow @DrCherylFraser on Instagram Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube

Join the waitlist for Cheryl's NEW Free Reboot Your relationship course - coming soon! Together with your partner, learn the steps to transform your relationship, reignite love, improve communication, and embrace sensuality. Say goodbye to procrastination and hello to real, lasting change.  Click here to get on the waitlist and you'll also be notified when the doors to the next session of the Become Passion Program open! “HELP! I've fallen out of love with my partner, should we break up?” “How do I learn to love my spouse again?” “Why is marriage so much work?” This episode of Sex, Love & Elephants is the ninth in a series about the rumored demise of long-term love. I'll be sharing my own expertise on the subject as well as interviewing experts in the field about love, sex, and communication. When the love song feels like it's over, is it time to quit or is it time to recommit? Today's subject is a tough one and I'm teaching it from the heart.  And what I'm going to say might just surprise you: we often throw away our romantic relationships too easily, too often. Ready to rate your relationship? Take Cheryl's Passion Quiz today and see how you and your honey rank. In This Episode, You'll Learn: The grass isn't always greener on the other side of a breakup (01:49) We can learn to change our mind instead of our mate (03:54) The elephant part of ourselves is free from fear and selfishness (10:33) Everything changes—some changes we like, some we don't (21:57) Today's LoveByte (33:14) Curious about Become Passion? Check out testimonials HERE from real couples just like you who have saved their relationships! Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource!  Recommended by Dr. Cheryl: Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay by Mira Kirshenbaum Let's Connect!   Follow @DrCherylFraser on Instagram Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube

Join the waitlist for Cheryl's NEW Free Reboot Your relationship course - coming soon! Together with your partner, learn the steps to transform your relationship, reignite love, improve communication, and embrace sensuality. Say goodbye to procrastination and hello to real, lasting change.  Click here to get on the waitlist and you'll also be notified when the doors to the next session of the Become Passion Program open! “Why does my partner purposefully tick me off?” “How can I be more understanding with my spouse?” “What makes long term love so hard?” This episode of Sex, Love & Elephants is the eighth in a series about the rumored demise of long-term love. I'll be sharing my own expertise on the subject as well as interviewing experts in the field about love, sex, and communication. Our mind can tell amazing stories. For example, we've all had a nightmare. The second we wake up, we thank goodness it was only a dream,  our heart is pounding, and we may even be soaked in sweat or have tears in our eyes. We may even be gasping for breath—all because of a story that our mind made up to be true.   Ready to rate your relationship? Take Cheryl's Passion Quiz today and see how you and your honey rank. In This Episode, You'll Learn: Our human body cannot tell if the story our brain is telling us is true or not true (07:06) Our brains often feed the flames of hate and distrust creating an inaccurate villain story about our sweetheart (09:15) To stop creating stories, we have to focus on strictly the facts (16:01) Today's LoveByte (24:31) Curious about Become Passion? Check out testimonials HERE from real couples just like you who have saved their relationships! Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource!  Let's Connect!   Follow @DrCherylFraser on Instagram Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube

Be the first to join the waitlist for Cheryl's FREE couples workshop this May! Click here to join.  (You'll also be notified when the doors to the next session of the Become Passion Program open!) “Why has my sex drive dropped as I've aged?” “How do I schedule sex with my partner?” “What are some ways I can set the mood for sex?” This episode of Sex, Love & Elephants is the seventh in a series about the rumored demise of long-term love. I'll be sharing my own expertise on the subject as well as interviewing experts in the field about love, sex, and communication. When my hubby and I first got together, we were absolutely insatiable—I'm talking nonstop passion and desire. But a decade or so on? Not so much! Now that we're both in our early 60's, our sex life takes some extra TLC to maintain but we're dedicated to making it happen. And today, I'm going to teach you exactly what our secret is.  Ready to rate your relationship? Take Cheryl's Passion Quiz today and see how you and your honey rank. In This Episode, You'll Learn: There are biochemical reasons that our desire wanes as we age (03:57) Married sex is scheduled sex (05:47) The key to scheduled sex is creating the right environment for intimacy (10:12) When we're non-sexual, we're missing out on a very profound part of being alive (16:37) Today's LoveByte (25:11) Curious about Become Passion? Check out testimonials HERE from real couples just like you who have saved their relationships! Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource!  Listen to Dr. Cheryl on Jack Canfield's podcast here. Let's Connect!   Follow @DrCherylFraser on Instagram Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube

Be the first to join the waitlist for Cheryl's FREE couples workshop this May! Click here to join.  (You'll also be notified when the doors to the next session of the Become Passion Program open!) “I love my partner, but they don't turn me on anymore… HELP!” “We never have sex anymore, should we get a divorce?” “Why am I never in the mood for sex?” This episode of Sex, Love & Elephants is the sixth in a series about the rumored demise of long-term love. I'll be sharing my own expertise on the subject as well as interviewing experts in the field about love, sex, and communication. It might be a familiar feeling: You're not looking to leave your sweetheart or trying to have an affair, but your sex life is either totally non-existent or downright lousy. Today, I'm giving you some very important tools to help you and your long-term partner reignite the spark you once had and bring back that butterflies-in-the-belly, over-the-moon sexual desire for one another.  Ready to rate your relationship? Take Cheryl's Passion Quiz today and see how you and your honey rank. In This Episode, You'll Learn: Responsive desire starts with a sensual encounter (03:44) Intimacy is the communication base of any romantic relationship (07:42) To start your sexual drive, you've got to warm up your erotic engine first (13:44) Don't wait around for the mood to hit you—make it a date (23:42) Today's LoveByte (29:16) Curious about Become Passion? Check out testimonials HERE from real couples just like you who have saved their relationships! Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource!  Let's Connect!   Follow @DrCherylFraser on Instagram Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube

Be the first to join the waitlist for Cheryl's FREE couples workshop this May! Click here to join.  (You'll also be notified when the doors to the next session of the Become Passion Program open!) “Is long term sexual attraction a myth?” “How can I be more attracted to my partner?” “Why does my sex life slow down the older I get?” This episode of Sex, Love & Elephants is the fifth in a series about the rumored demise of long-term love. I'll be sharing my own expertise on the subject as well as interviewing experts in the field about love, sex, and communication. I encourage you to think back to you and your honey's discovery of each other's bodies, your hearts, your erotic pleasure… Do you still experience those same feelings? Or have those butterflies disappeared over the years?  Today, I'm letting you in on a little secret to reignite the BIG spark with your sweetheart.  Ready to rate your relationship? Take Cheryl's Passion Quiz today and see how you and your honey rank. In This Episode, You'll Learn: My own sexual relationship with myself began with… an electric Snoopy toothbrush! (04:49) Menopause can cause radical changes to your sex life (09:11) 30 to 40% of couples are not making love at all (16:43) When we rely on spontaneous desire, our sex life is in trouble (20:36) You need to design a sex life that works for you (29:32) Today's LoveByte (31:40) Curious about Become Passion? Check out testimonials HERE from real couples just like you who have saved their relationships! Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource!  Let's Connect!   Follow @DrCherylFraser on Instagram Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube

Be the first to join the waitlist for Cheryl's FREE couples workshop this May! Click here to join.  (You'll also be notified when the doors to the next session of the Become Passion Program open!) “Dr. Cheryl, what's the secret to a long marriage?” “Why are divorce rates so high?” “How do I overcome conflict with my partner?” This episode of Sex, Love & Elephants is the fourth in a series about the rumored demise of long-term love. I'll be sharing my own expertise on the subject as well as interviewing experts in the field about love, sex, and communication. Today, I welcome relationship expert Bruce Muzik. Dubbed “The Couples Whisperer,” Bruce is a world-renowned relationship repair specialist and the founder of Love At First Fight, a company dedicated to helping couples transform their conflict-ridden relationships into thriving partnerships. Discover more about Bruce's work at LoveAtFirstFight.com or watch his powerful TEDx talk HERE. Ready to rate your relationship? Take Cheryl's Passion Quiz today and see how you and your honey rank. In This Episode, You'll Learn: Bruce and Cheryl admit their best and worst qualities as a partner (03:03) Long-term committed love isn't dead or alive—it's a journey (08:51) Different relationships have varying attachment styles (21:21) There are three developmental stages to relationship growth (37:53) Long-term love is a skill that can be learned (51:34) Today's LoveByte (01:01:49) Curious about Become Passion? Check out testimonials HERE from real couples just like you who have saved their relationships! Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource!  Let's Connect!   Follow @DrCherylFraser on Instagram Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube

Be the first to join the waitlist for Cheryl's FREE couples workshop this May! Click here to join.  (You'll also be notified when the doors to the next session of the Become Passion Program open!) “Dr. Cheryl, why do our arguments get so nasty?” “We talk, but we never make progress. What's the key to communication?” “How can we argue without fighting?” This episode of Sex, Love & Elephants is the third in a series about the rumored demise of long-term love. I'll be sharing my own expertise on the subject as well as interviewing experts in the field about love, sex, and communication. “I can't stand you.” “I'm out of here.” “What are we even doing together?”  If any of these sound familiar to you, you might just be wondering if long-term love is dead after all.  Today, I'm going to dive into the fact that long-term kind speech, civility, and respect aren't dead, but they may be on life support. Ready to rate your relationship? Take Cheryl's Passion Quiz today and see how you and your honey rank. In This Episode, You'll Learn: The three sides of the passion triangle are intimacy, thrill, and sensuality (01:50) Many of our arguments turn ugly because of emotional flooding (10:30) How to rate your conflict resolution skills (17:30) We need to connect before we attempt to communicate (26:34) Today's LoveByte (27:42) Curious about Become Passion? Check out testimonials HERE from real couples just like you who have saved their relationships! Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource!  Let's Connect!   Follow @DrCherylFraser on Instagram Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube

Be the first to join the waitlist for Cheryl's FREE couples workshop this May! Click here to join.  (You'll also be notified when door to the the next session of the Become Passion Program open!) “Dr. Cheryl, help! Why don't I feel as committed to my spouse as I used to?” “Why am I so scared to commit?” “How do I revive my commitment to my partner?” This episode of Sex, Love & Elephants is the second in a series about the rumored demise of long-term love. I'll be sharing my own expertise on the subject as well as interviewing experts in the field about love, sex, and communication. We believe that if we get married or move in together or make another human that we are committed: “Now we're a family and we're more committed than ever!” But the statistics and our own life experience don't necessarily prove that to be true… How committed are you to your long term relationship? At some point, you did choose to commit to your partner—whether you've said “I do” or not Ready to rate your relationship? Take Cheryl's Passion Quiz today and see how you and your honey rank! In This Episode, You'll Learn: Divorce can spawn so much ugliness—even convincing couples they were never in love at all (04:18) If you choose to seek couples therapy, make sure to do your research on the therapist (07:07) The Passion Triangle is a wonderful guide for long term commitment (11:13) Long-term love isn't dead—it's in a coma (20:32) Commitment is a choice (24:37) Today's LoveByte (33:18) Best of Sex, Love & Elephants: Stop Ugly Fighting! 3 Tips to Argue Effectively Be the first to join the waitlist for Cheryl's FREE couples workshop this May! Click here to join.   Curious about Become Passion? Check out testimonials HERE from real couples just like you who have saved their relationships! Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource!  Let's Connect!   Follow @DrCherylFraser on Instagram Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube

Be the first to know when Cheryl's next FREE couples workshop is offered! Click here to join the waitlist.   “Dr. Cheryl, how do I know when it's time for a divorce?” “Do people ever regret the decision to end their marriage?” “Is divorce the right decision for me and my spouse?” Is long-term love dead? Take a look at the number of divorces, the rate of affairs, younger generations talking about the lack of commitment… I'm not sure if it's dead, but it's definitely not looking good, is it?  This episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants kicks off a series about the rumored demise of long-term love. I'll be sharing my own expertise on the subject as well as interviewing experts in the field about love, sex, and communication. I'm not necessarily against divorce, but I do believe there are cases where it's not the only answer. In one study, people who'd been divorced for two years were asked: “Do you feel you made the right decision to end your marriage?” As it turns out, a whopping 50% of those surveyed said they had post-divorce regret.  In This Episode, You'll Learn: This fall may be the last time I hold my three month Become Passion Program—join the waitlist here (03:23) To save your relationship, kill the soulmate (05:00) Think back to what you miss about a brand new relationship—was it about the person or was it about the honeymoon phase? (14:50) You need to be the change you want to be in your relationship (18:48) Today's LoveByte (24:57) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource!  Let's Connect!   Follow @DrCherylFraser on Instagram Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube

Want to Rate your Relationship and Learn the Three Keys to Long Term Love?  Take the Passion Quiz Now!  “Dr. Cheryl, how can I spice things up in the bedroom with my sweetheart?” “Why has the heat left our sex life?” “How can I get my lover to be adventurous in bed like we used to be?” Think back to the beginning of your relationship… How spicy or adventurous or open or willing or playful or hot or uninhibited were you? And why aren't you and your lover that way anymore? Often when we make deeper steps towards commitment, the stakes are higher. We're more vulnerable than in those first few months and we become more fearful of rejection. On this Sex, Love, and Elephants rewind, I'm teaching you my biggest tips to bring the heat to your bedroom and the spice back to your long term relationship in 2025. Are you willing to settle for “nice” as the benchmark for success for your sexual life? I know that's not true for most of you, but maybe you've become a lazy lover. Do you wish you could be more inventive? That you could suggest things? That you could please your lover's body? In This Episode, You'll Learn: Most of us are more adventurous and playful in bed at the beginning (01:49) Get more acquainted with your own turn-ons (08:09) Share your sexual fantasy with your lover (13:11) Don't be lazy—do some research! (16:50) Today's LoveByte (17:36) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource!  Let's Connect!   Follow @DrCherylFraser on Instagram Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube

Want to Rate your Relationship and Learn the Three Keys to Long Term Love?  Take the Passion Quiz Now!  “But Dr. Cheryl, don't you know that romance is dead?”  “How can I be as sexy as those guys my wife reads about in her steamy books?” “Will I ever stop waiting for my rom com meet-cute whirlwind romance?!” It's pretty easy to be cynical about modern love. We're so misled by the media and romantic comedies and romance novels about what love should look like that it can be really dangerous to our relationships. We have this illusion that love and romance need to be a certain way, but the truth is that real life relationships are a whole lot different than what we see on the screen or read on the page.  On this Sex, Love, and Elephants rewind, I'm teaching you my biggest tips to create and sustain romance between you and your partner through 2025 and beyond.  When's the last time you and your sweetheart really thought out of the box for a date night? What about exploring a whole new-to-you cuisine, stepping out of your typical movie genre box, or even learning to ice skate together (and sharing a laughing fit when you both end up on your bottoms!) It can be hard to get out of your comfortable rut, but branching out can bring some much needed spice and bonding time to a long term relationship.  In This Episode, You'll Learn: The most important predictor of happiness, health, and well being in our lives is the health and happiness of our romantic relationship (00:40) Idealized portrayals of love can be damaging to our real life relationship (03:38) Date nights are a no-brainer and a non-negotiable (04:38) A great relationship is about taking action (11:16) Expressing gratitude lowers your heart rate and your stress response (12:09) Get off your butt and celebrate with your sweetheart (16:18) Today's LoveByte (18:56) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource!  Let's Connect!   Follow @DrCherylFraser on Instagram Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube

Want to Rate your Relationship and Learn the Three Keys to Long Term Love?  Take the Passion Quiz Now!  “But Dr. Cheryl, shouldn't the goal be not to have any arguments with my sweetheart?” If you're a human being who loves another human being, do you truly think it's healthy to never argue with your sweetheart? To never disagree, never have a tense conversation or one that leads to you feeling anxious or worried or hurt or angry?  On this Sex, Love, and Elephants rewind, I'm teaching you why a long term relationship with no fighting or arguing is one giant red flag. When you're arguing with your partner, you literally cannot know their side of things. You can't see their side of the clock, you can't visualize what they're seeing—they have a different background, a different family upbringing, different hopes and dreams. It's this simple, powerful idea that often becomes one of the most important teachings for couples in my Become Passion program.  In This Episode, You'll Learn: Couples who don't have conflict are avoiding the tough topics (02:00) One of the best ways to improve your communication is to take a step back from what's happening in the moment (09:38) To argue effectively, you and your honey need to agree on a “time out” signal (12:40) When we're triggered and irrational, we are being hijacked by our emotions (14:28) We make mistakes and our partners make mistakes—learn to apologize like a pro (19:30) Today's LoveByte (21:09) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource!  Let's Connect!   Follow @DrCherylFraser on Instagram Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube

“Dr. Cheryl, we never have sex anymore!”  “Dr. Cheryl, with the kids, the dog, and the mortgage, there's no time left for the bedroom!”  “Dr. Cheryl, our sex life has totally lost its spark—how did things become so boring?” These are the types of questions I hear repeatedly from the couples in my Become Passion program, and they're the sort of issues that nearly every long term relationship goes through. Whether you've found yourself running your marriage like a business or your sex life has become as exciting as a 12 hour Netflix binge, there is hope and you and your honey CAN bring the sexy back. On this episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants, I'm teaching you all about how to improve your sex life in the new year. I'm very passionate about helping long term couples just like you improve your relationship and I've had plenty of practice doing it. Today, you'll hear three tried and true tips to start out 2024 with your most sensual foot forward.  In This Episode, You'll Learn: My first tip for better sex is to practice more non-erotic touch (01:43) The three breath hug is a great way to start regularly using non-erotic touch (03:15) Tip number 2: Schedule sensual time (05:55) Waiting for spontaneous sexual desire is like waiting for a teenager to spontaneously clean their room (08:51) Whether you're making love these days or not, try bathing together naked (14:37) Tip three: Please, be a little more creative! (20:11) Today's LoveByte (21:55) Are you and your sweetheart finally ready to join my Become Passion program? The doors open April 2024! Click here to join the waitlist.  Still not sure about joining? Check out some testimonials from real couples just like you and your partner. Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Follow  @drcherylfraser on Instagram  Let's Connect!   About Me Instagram Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Facebook Page   Youtube If you want to rate your relationship, take the Passion Quiz

“Dr. Cheryl, how do I bring back the spark?” “How do I spice up my sex life with my spouse?” “Am I in a sexless marriage?” I'm a sex expert— That means my sex life is like a romantic comedy mixed with an erotic novel, right? Well, a lot of that used to be true, but things don't always stay all sunshine, butterflies, and constant bunny rabbit sex… Today's episode of Sex, Love & Elephants is a look back at my number one episode of 2024. You'll hear my hubby and I sit down for a chat about all things sensuality, sex, and what to do when those things stop being easy. In This Episode, You Will Learn: The lust you have for a stranger is a fleeting thing (05:57) Menopause can cause a radical downshift in a couple's sex life (15:38) Sexuality is neglected in long term couples—but there's nothing wrong with you if you're not having constant spontaneous desire (21:09) There are biological reasons for our lust to fade in a long term relationship (29:36)  Top Tip? Schedule Sex! Today's LoveByte (39:19) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz. Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram 

“Dr. Cheryl, how can I be more present for my sweetheart?” “What's the number one gift to give my spouse?” “How do I make Christmas more exciting?” This season, remember that gifts don't have to have a monetary value. Show your partner you care by being intentional and letting them know how much they matter to you. A happy, healthy relationship involves shared rituals—why not give your lover the gift of presence? On today's classic episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants, you'll hear a rerelease of one of my all time favorite episodes where I focus on the sex and love part of Christmas and show you some special ways to make this time together magical.  Remember being a kid on Christmas morning, waking up even before the sun… overwhelmed and giddy at the idea of what Santa Claus might've brought? Wouldn't it be nice to be able to recapture that special, magical feeling—even long after we stop believing in old St. Nick? In This Episode, You Will Learn: Yes, you CAN make the holidays more romantic and sexy and avoid becoming totally burnt out by the end of the season (04:33)  It's not about the presents, it's about the presence (11:00) If you've got  little inquiring eyes and ears around, put your stocking stuffer in an envelope or add an IOU for an erotic massage (12:34) If you don't celebrate Christmas, you don't have to put your gifts in a stocking (13:52) Why not try out The 12 Days of Christmas for Couples? Instead of a partridge in a pear tree, what about dancing to a romantic song together in the living room? (18:08) Today's LoveByte (25:52) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz. Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram 

“Dr. Cheryl, can I make the holidays special with my sweetheart?” “Why do I feel so burnt out at Christmastime?” “How can I prioritize my spouse?” No matter what you celebrate, the beginning of December always feels like the unofficial start to the busiest time of year. There are company holiday parties, the kids have their plays and concerts, and the family gatherings can feel endless… And with all that commotion, who has the time to make things feel special with their sweet heart? In today's throwback episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants, it's all about taking the chaotic, overscheduled energy of December and using some of it to honor and cherish the one who's by your side through it all.  Tune in and remember that first holiday season you spent with your sweetie. When you were dating and wooing and falling in love, you probably made a heck of a lot more effort during the holidays. You probably shopped more carefully, you probably did some romantic or sexy or fun gifts, and you probably really thought about: “How can I light my sweetheart up?”  In This Episode, You Will Learn: In the December holiday season, couples gets lost (02:03) Valentine's Day is a manufactured money grabbing cheap chocolate holiday—but if you open your mind, it can be a reminder to be romantic as heck (03:22) Your love affair doesn't take care of itself. You need to make passion a priority (12:13) It takes work and effort and repetition to improve and to be good at what you do—if you rest on your laurels, your laurels tend to fall apart (12:52) Your challenge is to make this holiday season joyful, compassionate, and generous—but also make it about the two of you. Carve out at least one special holiday date (13:38) This week's LoveByte (14:40) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz. Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram

Dr. Cheryl, is it time to reconsider my relationship? When did my hubby become so boring?  My partner cheated on me—how do I get over it? Have you ever done a relationship performance review? At work, your supervisor probably calls you in once a quarter or once a year. They give you feedback on where you're doing well, where you need to pick up the slack, and maybe even if you're being considered for a promotion or in danger of being let go.  On today's episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants, I'm talking all about the idea of a performance review—but this time, it's not at your job, it's a check in for you and your sweetheart.  Does your partner know what's lighting you up these days? What makes you feel good? Do they know what you're worried about? Do they know what's on your mind? If you can't answer all or any of these questions, it might be time for a review of your relationship. In This Episode, You Will Learn: Every relationship is vulnerable to falling into Marriage Incorporated (03:57) We all miss the thrill of the honeymoon phase, but it doesn't have to be gone for good (08:33) If you don't find your partner interesting anymore, someone else will (10:57) Most affairs aren't planned (14:03) Join the wait list for the free workshops I'm teaching in early 2025 (22:00) Today's LoveByte (34:09) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz. Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram 

Dr. Cheryl, how can I be happier in my circumstances? Why is my anxiety so overpowering?  How can I stop obsessing about the future? What's the cause of happiness? Could you be happier in a prison than you'd be in a monastery? And if we're accepting where we are, no matter good or bad, doesn't that mean that we're free?  Today's episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants features a Dharma Talk centered around suffering and why so much of our mental hardships are a choice that we make. Have you ever felt at times like you can't get out of an emotional state of anxiety or worry? Even when you know that much of it is a story and a lot of it is casting worry about the future? Even when you know that it's something you'll be able to pivot and cope through? If you've answered yes, there's no reason to be ashamed. There are times when we all fall prey to thinking like this.  In This Episode, You Will Learn: This too shall pass (06:11) Whether your in prison or paradise, your attitude is your choice (28:24) We all have self-imposed labels that stop us from being free (30:54) Beliefs are simply understandings that make sense based on what we currently know (47:37) We often find ourselves in the prison of the past or the prison of the future (51:29] Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz. Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram 

Dr. Cheryl, how can I express my true self? Why do I feel the need to hide from the world?  How can I work through my anger? We all play a hundred different roles and contain multitudes, but what are the masks you wear? And who are the goblins, demons, and vampires that plague you?  Today's episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants features a Dharma Talk where I teach about ideas that can feel much spookier than the ghosts and ghouls of Halloween.  What is your shadow self? What are the parts of yourself you don't like to look at? What are the parts of you that are your darker self from trauma, fear, and need? The more we can look at the masks we wear, the more we can examine the costumes we wear, the more we can have moments of grace and less suffering.  In This Episode, You Will Learn: We sometimes forget we're a whole conglomeration of shifting roles and personality traits (07:51) Where you put your attention, energy goes (24:13) We all have inner demons but when we repress or ignore them, they find their way out—usually in destructive ways (35:47) Hatred is illusory. Hatred is a state of mind that we can learn to see through and dissolve without taking unwholesome action (46:38) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz. Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram 

Missed registering for the Become Passion program? We can help you out! The first live class is this weekend.  Email support@drcherylfraser.com and we can try to get you in the back door! Dr. Cheryl, how can I learn to sincerely apologize? Should I be worried that my partner and I fight?  How can I make up with my partner after we argue? Imagine I install a camera in your home and record everything you say to your partner for a week—would you be comfortable sharing that footage with your nearest and dearest? The good, the bad, and the ugly? Or would you be ashamed and embarrassed at how you speak and interact with your sweetheart, especially in times of anger or frustration? Human beings in relationships are going to have disagreements—that's a fact of life. It sounds harsh, but if most people actually recorded themselves for a week and listened back to the way they spoke to their partner, they would be very disappointed in themselves. The trick is to make sure you and your honey both have the tools to have disagreements that aren't destructive - disagreements that actually help bring you closer together. I know, right? In this throwback episode, I talk about why a sincere vow to do better is one of the most important tools in your relationship arsenal, and why a mindful apology is an art in and of itself. I teach you the value of what I call “do-over. This love hack  is super   beneficial when you're arguing with your sweetie. In fact, I'll show you  how you can start practicing the technique today. Speaking kindly and thoughtfully to your partner is an integral part of a successful relationship. We can't just sit back and wait for our relationships to become fabulous and earth-shattering—we're responsible for creating that ourselves...  In This Episode, You Will Learn: If you're just sitting around and waiting for passion—good luck with that! YOU are responsible for creating a great relationship.  (04:26) When you're agitated, your body floods with adrenaline and cortisol, creating temporary aggression and irrationality (06:24) The opposite of kind speech is ugly speech. This includes name-calling, swearing at one another, and using absolute language. (09:50) If you're in a relationship with a real, live human being who's not six feet under, you're going to have disagreements… and that's totally fine.  (12:45) Don't make excuses—apologize like a mofo. (14:44) Your weekly LoveByte. (24:29) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz. Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram

Why is it so important to work on your relationship? Because when you neglect it, it grows stagnant. A love affair is a lot like a garden—if you don't tend to it, it gets overgrown with weeds. Want to revive your communication and your sex life? Are you ready to reignite love, romance, and passion and fall in love with your partner all over again—without years of counseling, silly quick-fix gimmicks, or endless relationship theories that don't give you the tools that actually work? Become Passion kicks off October 11th. Learn more about the program and register HERE. Curious but still want to know more? Check out the Become Passion testimonials for reviews from actual couples that I've helped through this profound program. “Dr. Cheryl, why is my marriage so boring?” “How do I make my relationship more fun?” “Is it over for me and my partner?” Join me today for part four of my chat with my hubby where we talk about all things Become Passion, including some of our favorite moments from past sessions and all the ways we work on our love. In This Episode, You Will Learn: My Become Passion program is kicking off THIS Friday—and there are still a few slots left for couples just like YOU (01:04) My hubby and I made our own marriage missteps before we found each other (04:33) The desire to know each other's hopes and dreams is what tends to die in the first couple years of a relationship (09:46) If you're bored with your partner, it's because your own mind is boring (13:27) If you want to create meaningful change, you need to be able to bring up and gently hold the resentments and the hurts of the years gone by (31:13) Today's LoveByte (39:47) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz. Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram 

I'm a sex expert— That means my sex life is like a romantic comedy mixed with an erotic novel, right? Well, a lot of that used to be true, but things don't always stay all sunshine, butterflies, and constant bunny rabbit sex… Want to revive your communication, romance, and sex life? Learn and practice The 3 Keys To Great Relationship so you can become one of those rare couples who are deeply connected, happy, romantic & affectionate with my FREE online Passion Masterclass.  Register now - pick the day and time that work for you and your partner! Want to know more about my 3 month couples program? Check out the Become Passion testimonials for reviews from actual couples that I've helped through this profound program. “Dr. Cheryl, why don't my partner and I connect like we used to?” “How do I spice up my sex life with my spouse?” “Am I in a sexless marriage?” Join me today for part three of my chat with my hubby where we cover sensuality and all things sex—when it's easy, when it's not, and what to do about it. In This Episode, You Will Learn: My FREE Passion masterclass is happening the first week of October—and I won't be teaching it for another 18 months  The lust you have for a stranger is a fleeting thing (05:57) Menopause can cause a radical downshift in a couple's sex life (15:38) Sexuality is neglected in long term couples—but there's nothing wrong with you if you're not having constant spontaneous desire (21:09) There are biological reasons for our lust to fade in a long term relationship (29:36)  Top Tip? Schedule Sex! Today's LoveByte (39:19) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz. Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram

What does a love and sex expert do when she gets into an argument with her husband? She acts like an absolute queen, uses all of her skills and never makes a mistake, and should win an Oscar for incredible communication skills, right? Well, it's not quite so simple… Want to revive your communication, romance, and sex life? Learn and practice The 3 Keys To Great Relationship so you can become one of those rare couples who are deeply connected, happy, romantic & affectionate with my FREE online Passion Masterclass.  Register now - pick the day and time that work for you and your partner! Want to know more about my 3 month couples program? Check out the Become Passion testimonials for reviews from actual couples that I've helped through this profound program. “Dr. Cheryl, why is open communication so hard?” “How can I be more honest with my sweetheart?” “Why are my partner and I constantly fighting?” Join me today for part two of my chat with my hubby where we're talking about communication, conflict resolution, and the intimacy side of the Passion Triangle.  In This Episode, You Will Learn: My FREE Passion masterclass is happening the first 3 days of October—and I won't be teaching it for another 18 months (03:20) The rituals that my hubby and I practice to stay connected (07:25) When a person is emotionally flooded, all sense goes out the window (13:26) Touch can be a great way to come back into alignment after a nasty fight (19:25) There's more to partnership than just coexisting under the same roof (26:37) Today's LoveByte (40:35) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz. Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram 

Meet my hubby! Ever wondered what it would be like to be married to a world famous sex and love expert? On today's episode, I'm sitting down for an interview with my very own hubby to get his take on all things Sex, Love, and Elephants. We talk about how important it is to keep the Thrill alive - and how we do that ourselves. Are you ready to create love and passion that last a lifetime? The doors for my exclusive 12-week immersion program open October 1! Join me for one of my FREE WORKSHOPS in early October to learn more. Click here to join the Become Passion waitlist today.  “Dr. Cheryl, how can I treat my partner better? “What are some ways to connect more fully with my spouse?” “Why is my relationship so boring now vs when we were first dating?” We're all human beings with our own issues, our own patterns, childhoods, and previous relationships. Sometimes, those things can ambush us and our partners… and even renowned sex and love professionals aren't immune to it! Want to know more about my program? Check out the Become Passion testimonials for reviews from actual couples that I've helped through this profound program. In This Episode, You Will Learn: This October is your last chance to join my Become Passion program for an entire year (02:52) The danger of Marriage Incorporated and boredom (05:19) Placing your hand over your partner's heart can activate the parasympathetic nervous system and help them to calm down (06:59) My hubby and I waited to have sex for the first five weeks of dating—and it made that intimacy all the more exciting (11:37) Why THRILL is so important and how you and your sweetheart need to make an effort to keep romance, spark, and interest alive (21:02) Today's LoveByte (36:39) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz. Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram 

Are you ready to create love and passion that last a lifetime? The doors for my exclusive 12-week immersion program open October 1!  Join me for one of my FREE WORKSHOPS in early October to learn more. Click here to join the Become Passion waitlist today.  “Dr. Cheryl, I screwed up my relationship… Please HELP!” “How can I fix my broken marriage?” “Is there a way to bring back the intimacy and thrill in my relationship?” If you and your honey could begin again, how would you do things differently? Maybe you weren't so attentive when you were dating, maybe last week when you had an ugly repeating argument, or  maybe you realized you were neglecting a really important aspect of your relationship…  On today's episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants, I'm teaching you how my Passion Triangle can allow you and your sweetheart to develop a whole new perspective on your relationship. Unless somebody out there has a time machine, it's impossible to go back and redo those earlier phases—but if you could do it over again, would you? Want to know more about my program? Check out the Become Passion testimonials for reviews from actual couples that I've helped through this profound program. In This Episode, You Will Learn: The Become Passion program starts this October and is full of real couples with real problems—just like you and your sweetie (02:25) My Passion Triangle is made up of sensuality, thrill, and intimacy (04:38) Intimacy is more than sex, it's about psychological communication, too (07:15) Many couples have repeating issues and arguments because most of us were never taught conflict resolution (11:17) Thrill means making the effort to fall in love again with the one we're already with (17:59) 30-40% of long term couples are in what is clinically defined as a sexless relationship (21:11) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz. Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram 

“Dr. Cheryl, why are relationships so hard?!” “Is there an easier way to connect with my partner?” “My spouse and I no longer ‘click'—what's wrong with us?” Today's Sex, Love, and Elephants is another flashback to my Summer of Love series from a few years ago. In it, I talk about why we struggle so much with the thing we longed for AND why that struggle doesn't make us a bad person.  Tune in and hear what I've learned from my decades of work with couples just like you. Are you ready to reconnect with your honey? To create love and passion that last a lifetime? Join the Become Passion waitlist and hear more about the program!  Want to know more? Check out the Become Passion testimonials for reviews from actual couples that I've helped through this profound program. In This Episode, You Will Learn: We all are with the wrong person if we expect them to make us happy all the time (04:07) In my Become Passion program, you'll learn to how to fall back in love with the one you're already with (07:41) Having a great relationship isn't easy—it takes real, hard work (10:24) We've all got baggage, and that's not necessarily a bad thing (21:26) Love Stinks and it's not your fault (24:03) This week's LoveByte (28:06) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz. Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram 

“Dr. Cheryl, our sex life is so boring! How can we bring fun back to our bedroom?”  “Why don't I ever feel horny toward my partner anymore?” “How do I know if my relationship is great?” Today's Sex, Love, and Elephants is part of a series of my all-time favorite couples Q&A episodes that I did a few summers ago. In it, I'm teaching you my 3 predictors of a great relationship and sharing some really dire stats on the sex lives of average North Americans—that you DON'T have to fall into! Tune in and hear what I've learned from my decades of work with couples just like you. Are you ready to reconnect with your honey? To create love and passion that last a lifetime? Join the Become Passion waitlist and hear more about the program!  Want to know more? Check out the Become Passion testimonials for reviews from actual couples that I've helped through this profound program. In This Episode, You Will Learn: “Nipple, nipple, crotch, good-night” sex is totally common… and totally boring (05:10) The three keys to a great relationship: intimacy, communication, conflict resolution (07:37) We all want sex to be spontaneous… but scheduling intimacy is one of the major keys to getting your spark back (10:17) The majority of long term couples make love from a place of sexual neutrality—and it's actually very sexy! (15:30) Waiting around for spontaneous desire is kind of like waiting around for your teenager to spontaneously offer to clean out the garage (18:04) This week's LoveByte (28:45) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz. Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram

“Dr. Cheryl… I feel like my wife and I are more friends and roommates than lovers. How can we bring sexy back?”  “Why do men only care about sex and not romance?” “What are some great date ideas to reconnect with my partner?” Today's Sex, Love, and Elephants is part of a series of my all-time favorite couples Q&A episodes that I did a few summers ago. In it, I'm busting the myth that men don't care about romance and telling you why dates are one of the most exciting parts of dating. I also teach you why the thrill of the chase is so important evolutionarily, why we have to learn to make time alone with one another, and why it's so easy to fall into a pattern of relationship complacency. Tune in and hear what I've learned from my decades of work with couples just like you. Are you ready to reconnect with your honey? To create love and passion that last a lifetime? Join the Become Passion waitlist and hear more about the program! This twelve-week immersion couples program with me, Dr. Cheryl, starts this October. Want to know more? Check out the Become Passion testimonials for reviews from actual couples that I've helped through this profound program. In This Episode, You Will Learn: It's not just women who miss the romance when it leaves a relationship (07:59) The excitement of dating comes from the chase and the courtship (12:40) Dates aren't a place to talk about the kids or the household concerns, they're a place to connect on a one-on-one level (15:57) The adventure date, the cooperation date, and the curiosity date are all great ideas for reconnecting with your sweetheart (17:14) This week's LoveByte (34:30) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz. Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram 

“Dr. Cheryl, can my honey and I become more compatible?”  “I'm a homebody and my partner is a social butterfly… will our relationship last?” “How can a couple succeed in love even if they're very different?” Today's Sex, Love, and Elephants is part of a series of some of my all-time favorite couples Q&A episodes that I did a few summers ago. In it, I'm talking about introverts, extroverts, and extroverted introverts.  I'm also telling you that YES, it is possible to make things work between two very different people and how compatibility begins in the mind.  Tune in and hear what I've learned from my decades of work with couples just like you. Are you ready to reconnect with your honey? To create love and passion that last a lifetime? Join the Become Passion waitlist and hear more about the program!  Want to know more? Check out the Become Passion testimonials for reviews from actual couples that I've helped through this profound program. In This Episode, You Will Learn: An introvert replenishes with quiet and solitude (03:20) Compatibility with your partner is all in your head (10:08) You can be rapturously happy, deeply in love, and have an extraordinary relationship—even if you are wildly different people (11:39) Oftentimes the differences aren't the problem... The problems come when we fail at our approach (16:40) If you focus on the ways you're not compatible—on the big and small irritations—you will fester a growing wound (19:22) This week's LoveByte (26:31) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz. Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram

“Dr. Cheryl… Why am I so turned on by the idea of being sexually dominated?”  “How can I explore my sexual fantasies?” “Is it healthy to indulge in sexual fantasy? Today's Sex, Love, and Elephants is part of a series of my all-time favorite couples Q&A episodes that I did a few summers ago. In it, I'm talking all about the beauty of sexual fantasies, why they're healthy, and I'm debunking some ideas from that popular erotic book series.  Tune in and hear what I've learned from my decades of work with couples just like you. Are you ready to reconnect with your honey? To create love and passion that last a lifetime? Join the Become Passion waitlist and hear more about the program!  Want to know more? Check out the Become Passion testimonials for reviews from actual couples that I've helped through this profound program. In This Episode, You Will Learn: 50 Shades of Grey is a dumb book—but there's a reason it captured so many imaginations (5:04) The number one heterosexual female fantasy? Ravishment (08:24) The ravishment fantasy is so pervasive because it gives women a way to justify their raw sexual energy (12:20) Exploring your sexual fantasies is healthy and empowering as long as it's not hurting anyone and everyone gives consent (20:58) My new favorite Netflix show features the Mary Poppins of sex and makes couples' fantasies a reality (24:45) This week's LoveByte (27:49) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz. Resources mentioned: How to Build a Sex Room on Netflix Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram 

“Dr. Cheryl, is it time to break up with my verbally abusive partner?”  “My partner and I fall into verbally abusive patterns, how can we overcome this?” “How do I know if my spouse is verbally abusing me?” Today's Sex, Love, and Elephants is part of a series of some of my all-time favorite couples Q&A episodes that I did a few summers ago. In it, I'm sharing my advice for those of you that are wondering if verbal abuse in a relationship can ever be overcome. Tune in and hear what I've learned from my decades of work with couples just like you. Are you ready to reconnect with your honey? To create love and passion that last a lifetime? Join the Become Passion waitlist and hear more about the program!  Want to know more? Check out the Become Passion testimonials for reviews from actual couples that I've helped through this profound program. In This Episode, You Will Learn: How to identify verbal abuse (4:34) The importance of taking a time out when you're flooded (11:57) An example of a non-verbally abusive, highly emotional person (16:39) That there are countless ways to learn how to fight fair, apologize, and forgive (24:46) If you should break up with your verbally abusive partner (27:50) This week's LoveByte (30:39) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz. Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram

“ Dr. Cheryl, my honey and I never fight… Is that okay?”  “My partner avoids all conflict with me, what can I do?” “How can my spouse and I learn to communicate more effectively?” Today's Sex, Love, and Elephants is part of a series of some of my all-time favorite episodes that I did a few summers ago. In it, I talk about why a lack of conflict can spell major issues for your relationship—and what you can do to help before it's too late. Are you ready to reconnect with your honey? To create love and passion that last a lifetime? Join the Become Passion waitlist and hear more about the program!  Want to know more? Check out the Become Passion testimonials for reviews from actual couples that I've helped through this profound program. In This Episode, You Will Learn: Zero conflict can spell trouble for your relationship (04:29) Everyone has a different communication style—which isn't necessarily a bad thing (05:29) Your health and happiness in your relationship may be in trouble if you don't learn how to talk about the difficult topics (07:02)  There's nothing wrong with you if your nature is to avoid conflict, but it isn't healthy to sweep things under the rug (09:31) A technique to begin cleaning out all that crap under the rug (14:49) This week's LoveByte (21:05) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz. Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram 

“Dr. Cheryl, is it time for me to leave my relationship?” “I think my marriage is over… will I regret my decision to split?” “How do I know if there's still hope for my sweetheart and me?” Today's Sex, Love, and Elephants is the first in a series of some of my all-time favorite episodes that I did a few summers ago. In it, I talk about when to give your relationship another shot—and when it's time to let it go. This episode is a couples Q&A series with one of my number one most asked questions: “How do I know when it's time to leave?”  Tune in and hear what I've learned from my decades of work with couples just like you.  Are you ready to reconnect with your honey? To create love and passion that last a lifetime? Join the Become Passion waitlist and hear more about the program!  Want to know more? Check out the Become Passion testimonials for reviews from actual couples that I've helped through this profound program. In This Episode, You Will Learn: When is it time to leave a relationship? Only you and your partner can answer that—but I can help you decide (03:47) But…If you are in a dangerous, sexually coercive, physically or otherwise abusive relationship, this episode is not for you. Please seek crisis help immediately (07:05) Research shows that about 50% of people who leave a committed relationship DO regret it. Maybe it's not too late to begin again (12:03) Chances are, if you leave one committed relationship, you'll recouple. That's our nature as a species. (13:53) So much of our relationship misery can be rehabilitated (23:04) This week's LoveByte (33:58) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram

Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz. “Dr. Cheryl, my spouse is driving me crazy! How can I fall in love with them again?” “I'm constantly annoyed by my partner, is it time to break up?” “Why is my sweetheart always doing things to piss me off?!” Think about a negative thought you've had about your partner—one that you might not be so eager to share publicly. Maybe they were late for a meaningful dinner, maybe they neglected an important chore, or maybe they even forgot about your anniversary… You were probably pretty irritated, right? But what if I were to tell you that it's all about the way you react? On this episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants, I'm teaching you how to love what is and how we can be more grateful for the extraordinarily lucky lives that we lead.  The stories you tell yourself can ruin your relationship, ruin your happiness, and even ruin your health.  If you're upset, disgruntled, or put off by your partner's mundane mistakes or actions, it's your problem, not your sweetie's. In This Episode, You Will Learn: 87 to 92% of people eventually recouple after a divorce, a break up, or being widowed (01:24) The misery in your head is in your head (05:27) Don't allow a negative story to take up room in your head and ruin your day (08:41) Changing a behavioral habit is hard and it takes repetition (14:51) You are the one who makes yourself happy or not (18:12) Today's LoveByte (22:34) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram 

Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz. “Dr. Cheryl, my marriage is so boring—HELP!” “How can I bring back the magic and spark to my relationship?” “Why was my partner so much more attractive when we were first dating?” Don't wait for a wake up call. Don't wait for an affair. Don't wait until your husband gets a diagnosis that scares the hell out of you—and don't wait for a sudden death. Don't wait until it's too late to show up and love the one you love. On this episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants, I'm teaching you all about Marriage Incorporated and how you can best avoid complacency and boredom in your relationship… before it's too late. You want to learn how to have a much better, stronger relationship.  Today, we're talking about cultivating more love, more interest, more kindness, more peacefulness, and how to really be more like we were when we were falling in love. In This Episode, You Will Learn: If you are in Marriage Incorporated, you may be having a really nice life, but you're roommates, not partners (06:30) You were a lot nicer to your partner when you were dating (16:20) If you lose your partner suddenly, you'll quickly realize that, no matter how fraught the relationship has been, you'll have regrets if you haven't loved well (17:41) All too often in this short, wonderful, and precious life, we run out of time (23:06) Your weekly LoveByte (32:27) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube  Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram

Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz. Today's episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants is one of my favorites from the early days of the podcast. In it, I talk about why a sincere vow to do better is one of the most important tools in your relationship arsenal, and why a mindful apology is an art in and of itself.  If I installed a camera in your home and recorded everything you said to your partner for a week—would you be comfortable sharing that footage with your nearest and dearest? The good, the bad, and the ugly? Or would you be ashamed and embarrassed at how you speak and interact with your sweetheart, especially in times of anger or frustration? Human beings in relationships are going to have disagreements—that's a fact of life. It sounds harsh, but if most people actually recorded themselves for a week and listened back to the way they spoke to their partner, they would be very disappointed in themselves. The trick is to make sure you and your honey both have the tools to have disagreements that aren't destructive—disagreements that actually help bring you closer together. I know, right? In This Episode, You Will Learn: YOU are responsible for creating a great relationship (04:26) When you're agitated, your body floods with adrenaline and cortisol, creating temporary aggression and irrationality (06:24) The opposite of kind speech is ugly speech (09:50) If you're in a relationship with a real, live human being, you're going to have disagreements… and that's totally fine. (12:45) Don't make excuses—apologize like a mofo (14:44) Your weekly LoveByte (24:29) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram 

Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz. “Dr. Cheryl, why am I so unhappy?” “I'm always upset—How can I learn to go with the flow?” “Nothing good ever happens to me, what's the secret to happiness?” Why is it that we're so puzzled about the fundamental ground of what leads to more happiness and less suffering? As it turns out, there is a way to be happy for no reason, a way to have a better, healthier relationship with the person you love, and a way to be a better person. Today's episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants features a Dharma Talk that I gave last month on happiness, negativity, and the coping mechanisms we use to deal with it all.  Tune in and hear my teachings about the most universal experiences that none of us get to escape and the fact that we, as humans, don't get to change reality.  In This Episode, You Will Learn: We're all going to die—it's important to make time for wholesome activities (01:40) Reality sucks sometimes, mortality and loss and suffering is real (10:01) How we react to big, difficult, painful losses is our choice (18:57) We cling and try to manipulate reality so it works for us, but it's a fool's errand (25:48) Today's LoveByte (50:54) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram 

Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz  “Dr. Cheryl, why am I always so pessimistic about my relationship?” “How can my partner and I be more positive about one another?” “Why can't my sweetheart do anything right?!” It may be 2024, but we still have brains that evolved from the cave days. Over the eons, our brains have developed certain survival patterns that have held on in even the most intelligent minds. One of those leftover base instincts that we're still coping with today is negativity bias and it just might be the biggest issue in your relationship. On today's episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants, I'm teaching you all about negativity bias and the importance of thinking positively about your partner. Today is all about training your mind to do a better job of defaulting toward a positive point of view. I'm giving you a few short examples and some more elaborate models and exercises that you can do to bolster your relationship with your sweetheart. In this episode, you'll learn: If your partner is consistently rude and condescending—even if it's not directed toward you—it needs to be addressed (03:40) Our minds tend to look for what's wrong and not what's right (08:05) You do NOT have to say every negative thing that comes to mind (15:32) Sharing a home and sharing a life demands graceful compromise (17:04) Today's LoveByte (26:11) Have questions about meditation or about your relationship? Send them to us at Hello@drcherylfraser.com. Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube If you want to rate your relationship, take the Passion Quiz Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram 

Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz  “Dr. Cheryl, my partner and I haven't had sex in months—PLEASE HELP!” “Why does sexual desire slow down in long term relationship? “How can I bring back the sex and passion to my relationship?” You've heard me say it before on this podcast: Sexless relationships are way more common than you think. The definition for a sexless relationship is one where sex is had six or fewer times per year. That means that if you're making love but it's only once every two months or so, you and your sweetheart are in what is defined as a “sexless” or “lower sex” relationship.  On today's episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants, I'm teaching you all about sexless relationships and the solutions out there that can work for you.  Many of you may have not made love for years… And that's way more common than you think. One of the biggest problems is that no one talks about it, so we end up having a lot of shame, embarrassment, and confusion around those changes instead of finding a solution that works for our relationship.  In this episode, you'll learn: We're so busy running our lives that we often lose each other (03:53) Make your sensual life a priority—especially if you're in a long term relationship (10:33) Sometimes, we get so good at running our lives like a business that we know longer see our partner as a sexual being (11:48) The idea of scheduled intimacy doesn't sound romantic but it just may save your sex life (14:41) Today's LoveByte (23:06) Have questions about meditation or about your relationship? Send them to us at Hello@drcherylfraser.com. Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube If you want to rate your relationship, take the Passion Quiz Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram

“Dr. Cheryl, how can I shake up my boring relationship?” “Why does it feel like we're roommates instead of lovers?” “How can my sweetheart and I learn to live and love in the moment?” One of the worst silent killers in relationships is when we find ourselves slowly falling into complacency and boredom overtime. When we lose that loving feeling, it can lead to major disappointment and dissatisfaction in a relationship but all hope is not lost—there are ways you can reconnect.  Today's episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants is a short check-in for you and your sweetheart. So often we get caught up in the mundane and, sadly for a lot of us, many times that means that  we're caught up in irritation with our partner. Whether it's frustration about a messy house or worries over money, nothing matters as much as valuing and loving your sweetie right now, at this very moment.  Today you'll learn: Don't wait for a major life event to tell your honey how much you love them (03:31) Love your partner deeply, wholly, and expansively and love them like there's no tomorrow (04:23) I encourage and challenge each of us to become a great partner and bring more flexibility and more grace because we don't have them forever (08:01) Today's LoveByte (08:30) Have questions about meditation or about your relationship? Send them to us at Hello@drcherylfraser.com. Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz  Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube If you want to rate your relationship, take the Passion Quiz Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram 

“Dr. Cheryl, how can I help my constant negative thoughts?” “I'm ALWAYS anxious. Is there a way to quiet my constantly running mind?” “Is it possible to practice kindness?” Meditation is a traditional Buddhist practice that fits very beautifully into the secular world, into the psychology world, into the mindfulness world, and into the world of us trying to be a kinder, more caring human being to ourselves and others. A metta meditation, or a loving kindness meditation, can be practiced whenever you have a bit of time to yourself.  Today's episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants features a metta meditation from a live Dharma talk that I gave last month.   This is a special episode of the podcast that sounds a little different from the others. This meditation is under 30 minutes long—just make sure you're free of distractions while you listen. I invite you to come back and use this meditation whenever you feel the need for more calm and balance in your life.  This episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants features a metta meditation that begins at (02:19) and ends around (31:00). Have questions about meditation or about your relationship? Send them to us at Hello@drcherylfraser.com. Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz  Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube If you want to rate your relationship, take the Passion Quiz Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram 

“Dr. Cheryl, how can I overcome my self doubt? It's ruining my life!” “How do I break free from the torturous grip that my anxiety has on me?” “Why has my experience with meditation been unfulfilling?” We've all had that moment of desire and weakness—a good friend buys a fancy new car and we're overcome with jealousy. Instead of being happy for them and proud of their hard work, all we can focus on is what we're lacking. But the remedy to this feeling isn't to go out and buy a new car yourself. Instead, the answer involves practicing generosity for others and focusing on relieving ourselves of that wanting, selfish feeling.  Today's episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants features a Dharma Talk that I gave last month about the five hindrances that stand between us and happiness.  The five hindrances get in the way of calm, they get in the way of focus, and they make it harder to accept what is with equanimity—that is, they're stopping us from being able to go with the flow and to recalibrate ourselves… Without the temper tantrum.  In This Episode, You Will Learn: The hindrances can get in the way of concentrating on the important object (03:51) Even when you're well rested and alert in your physiology, sloth and torpor can come like a shadow over the sun (09:18) The very last wisp of difficulty to disappear before you become a fully awake Buddha is the last vestige of doubt (11:12) We don't have to have a gigantic temper tantrum to feel exhausted, even a small little worry can be fatiguing (16:27) When you slow down in meditation, the mind gets a little more acute, a little more precise, and a little more clear (22:55) Hindrances are like nasty waves that blind us to the calm ocean (28:15) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube If you want to rate your relationship, take the Passion Quiz Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram 

The doors to Become Passion are OPEN—make sure you and your sweetheart are signed up before they close on May 3rd!! Join me this Thursday, May 2nd for a very special LIVE Q&A over Zoom - email me at hello@drcherylfraser.com and we will send you the link and time This week on Sex, Love, and Elephants, I take you behind the scenes as I talk with some of my Become Passion students about their relationship struggles and how they overcame… Today, I'm joined by six REAL couples who have participated in my Become Passion training.  Are you ready to create love and passion that last a lifetime? The doors for my exclusive Become Passion program are open now and close May 3rd! This twelve-week immersion couples program with me, Dr. Cheryl, starts May 3rd. A failing relationship doesn't always look like explosive fights and shouting matches and slamming doors… it can just as easily look like apathy and boredom and quiet resentment. What matters most is how you chose to bring those issues into the light—and whether or not you're willing to fight to make things better.  In This Episode, You Will Learn: This Wednesday's LIVE Q&A on ZOOM is your last chance to join me for a free event before we kick off Become Passion (01:20) Karen and Steve didn't have nasty fights, but they were struggling with their sexuality as they aged (03:57) Between kids, careers, and household responsibility, it's so easy for a relationship to become Marriage Incorporated (07:30) Lisa and Cam found themselves in flooded arguments that became destructive to their relationship (18:22) Howard and Karen were separated for 6 months before they found Become Passion and learned how to fall in love all over again (22:29) Today's LoveByte (33:00) Got questions? Email hello@drcherylfraser.com. Follow  @drcherylfraser on Instagram  Let's Connect!   About Me Instagram Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Facebook Page   Youtube If you want to rate your relationship, take the Passion Quiz

Ready to renovate your OWN relationship? Be one of the few select couples who join me inside the Become Passion – Create Love that Lasts a Lifetime 12-week online immersion program for couples. To learn more and to join, CLICK HERE We begin May 3rd, 2024 and go through July 26th 2024 In today's episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants, I'm going to give you a look inside my Passion Masterclass - a FREE couples workshop I do ONCE  a year. It's packed with information about the 3 Keys to Passion and much more. I also give you the opportunity to take the next steps in your relationship journey with me as your guide and romance cheerleader! (Yes, you can be both a hopeless romantic and a scientist—fun combination.) Here's the good news: You are NOT alone and it's NOT too late… even if it feels like it! In fact, on average, over 30% of the long-term couples I see in my practice aren't having any sex whatsoever.  In this exclusive recording of my Passion MAsterclass you'll learn about the keys to great relationship and how you can shift your relationship from where it is to where you want it to be. You'll learn that extraordinary Lifelong Passion is 100% Possible, but you must beware of Marriage Inc. (AKA running your relationship like a business). You'll also learn how to create much more intimacy, thrill, and sensuality—no matter where your relationship is currently. Want to watch the actual masterclass with video? Click here! In This Episode, You Will Learn: The 3 Keys to Passion – What they are, and Why mastering them will help you cultivate great love and sex that last a lifetime  Intimacy: “Marital Friendship”  Why Learning to Fight Fair is so important. Painful repeating arguments  Thrill: Why it is so difficult to keep the excitement, attraction, and romance going – and what you need to do about it. Getting real Sensuality: How to wake up your erotic life. Did you know most long-term couples make love only a few times a month?  Got a question or topic you'd like me to cover in an upcoming episode? Email me at hello@drcherylfraser.com Let's Connect! Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Facebook Page   Youtube If you want to rate your relationship, take the Passion Quiz

This month only! Dr. Cheryl is teaching some FREE relationship workshops! Sign up NOW for one of her Passion Masterclasses - choose the time that works best for you. You'll also hear about the 12 week Become Passion program—it kicks off May 3rd. Doors are not open! You can check it out and join the program HERE  Still not sure if Become Passion is right for you? Check out some testimonials from real couples just like you! Marriage 911! What's your emergency?  “We are miserable.When do you know to give up? Or is there a chance this relationship can be saved?” ” Let's face it, staying in love over the long haul is difficult. You may feel you have fallen out of love, ot you argue all the time, or so it seems. Attraction and desire may feel non-existent. But don't give up. There are proven steps that can help you renovate your relationship. It takes effort to make long term love work - and I am here to help.  .  On today's episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants, you'll learn that reviving the love, communication and yes, even the desire in your  relationship is possible. Whatever you and your partner are experiencing, even when it feels like all hope is lost, it is still possible to begin again  In This Episode, You'll Learn: Falling in love is easy, but staying in love over the long term takes mindfulness, effort, and dedication (0:11) The Become Passion Program involves eight weeks of lessons, live coaching calls with Dr. Cheryl where she answers your confidential questions, and bonuses trrainings with other experts in relationships and sexuality (3:03) The Become Passion 12 week program is an online program (3:44) The number one predictor of health, happiness, longevity, and more, is the quality of our romantic relationship with our companion - so work on it!  (5:07) The Become Passion program is an immersion 3 month program and we do the real work. It's not easy…but it IS effective. Let's create the change you desire, starting next week!   (6:13) Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube If you want to rate your relationship, take the Passion Quiz Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram 

This month only! Dr. Cheryl is teaching some FREE relationship workshops! Sign up NOW for one of her Passion Masterclasses - choose the time that works best for you. You'll also hear about the 12 week Become Passion program—it kicks off May 3rd. Still not sure if Become Passion is right for you? Check out some testimonials from real couples just like you! Marriage 911! What's your emergency?  My partner and I are getting older and our sex life just isn't what it used to be. What's happening to us? As we age, we all experience changes in our desire, arousal, and body image. In fact, there are changes in what feels like almost everything to do with our sexual life—whether it's with our partner or with ourselves.  On today's episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants, you'll learn that even if you've experienced some big changes to your sex life as you've gotten older, there are solutions to the trouble you're facing. I want you to listen carefully and hear the hope. In This Episode, You'll Learn: A satisfying sex life for a couple that has at least one male bodied person in it doesn't have to revolve around a firm erection (01:30) Women can still have great sex post-menopause—it might just look different than before (04:54) It's easy to give up when your bodies aren't responding well, but there are solutions out there (06:17) Sex is a way of connecting erotically, emotionally, and spiritually with our partner and it's a vital part of life and love (08:21) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube If you want to rate your relationship, take the Passion Quiz Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram 

This month only! Dr. Cheryl is teaching some FREE relationship workshops! Sign up NOW for one of her Passion Masterclasses - choose the time that works best for you. You'll also hear about the 12 week Become Passion program—it kicks off May 3rd. Still not sure if Become Passion is right for you? Check out some testimonials from real couples just like you! Marriage 911! What's your emergency?  “The thrill is gone!” “I love my partner, but I'm not in love with them any more.”  “We're no longer lovers—we're merely roommates.”  If any of these relationship emergencies sound familiar, you're in the right place. On today's episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants, you'll learn that your relationship isn't over, even if it feels like all the spark has long fizzled out. The house, the kids, and the bills can all overwhelm your romance, but they don't have to take priority over passion.  In This Episode, You'll Learn: Falling out of love and into Marriage Incorporated is insidious (03:43) Make your love life your hobby (06:13) Great date nights don't have to be fancy or expensive—but they are so important to schedule (08:28) Big change only happens when we take action (10:27) Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource! Let's Connect!   Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Youtube If you want to rate your relationship, take the Passion Quiz Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram 

Register now for Dr. Cheryl's FREE Relationship Reboot couples workshop on Zoom - Saturday April 13th 10-1 Pacific time HEREThis month only! Dr. Cheryl is teaching some FREE relationship workshops! If you want to be the first to know when registration opens make sure you get on the VIP waitlist HERE.You'll also hear about the 12 week Become Passion program—it kicks off May 3rd.Still not sure if Become Passion is right for you? Check out some testimonials from real couples just like you!Marriage 911! What's your emergency? Dr. Cheryl, HELP! How can I ever get over the pain of my partner's affair? Believe it or not, it is possible to recover from a betrayal in your relationship. It may not be easy, but great relationships always revolve around intention.On today's episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants, I'm teaching you everything you need to know about affairs—and what you and your partner can do in the aftermath to try and reestablish trust in your relationship. In This Episode, You'll Learn:There are sexual affairs and emotional affairs and they can be equally devastating (02:18)An emotional affair is when you're sharing intimate hopes and dreams with someone who's not your spouse and your spouse doesn't know (03:29)All sympathy tends to go to the person who's been cheated on, but we're all just bozos on the bus who make mistakes (06:49)No one can earn our trust, they can only choose to act in a trustworthy manner (09:40) Very few things hurt as much as being betrayed, but there is hope (10:33)Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource!Let's Connect! Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here YoutubeIf you want to rate your relationship, take the Passion QuizFollow @drcherylfraser on Instagram Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This month only! Dr. Cheryl is teaching some FREE relationship workshops! If you want to be the first to know when registration opens make sure you get on the VIP waitlist HERE.You'll also hear about the 12 week Become Passion program—it kicks off May 3rd.Still not sure if Become Passion is right for you? Check out some testimonials from real couples just like you!Marriage 911! What's your emergency? So, you've just had a flooded argument… Even if you didn't resort to overt verbal abuse like yelling, swearing, or being especially cruel, you know that you said irrational things. But here's the truth: It's not entirely your fault. When we're dysregulated, we're not rational. On today's episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants, I'm teaching you about verbal abuse. Verbal abuse has the power to make us spiral—we go down the dark rabbit hole and end up rehashing every old wound, never seeming to get out of that same repeating argument. It isn't always obvious but it does occur way too often—and it can absolutely destroy your relationship.In This Episode, You'll Learn:Verbal abuse can be bickering, criticizing and nitpicking, and using controlling language (04:09)Giving your partner the silent treatment or a severe lack of communication can also feel abusive (04:37)Learning to self regulate our emotions is one of the most important things we can do for our relationships (06:58)Be kind to your friend… And if you snap, apologize! (07:38)Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource!Let's Connect! Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here YoutubeIf you want to rate your relationship, take the Passion QuizFollow @drcherylfraser on Instagram Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This month only! Dr. Cheryl is teaching some FREE relationship workshops! If you want to be the first to know when registration opens make sure you get on the VIP waitlist HERE.You'll also hear about the 12 week Become Passion program—it kicks off May 3rd.Still not sure if Become Passion is right for you? Check out some testimonials from real couples just like you!Marriage 911! What's your emergency? Maybe you feel like it's time for divorce, or you've fallen out of head-over-heels love, or maybe you're even trying to recover from one of you stepping out on your relationship. Whatever it is, every long term relationship runs into big obstacles… It's who we are and what we do together to surmount those obstacles that really matters in the end. On today's episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants, I'm teaching you about some of the biggest pain points a couple can have. That includes being on the edge of divorce, struggling with verbal abuse, attempting to recover from an affair, and that dreaded “I love you… but I'm not IN love with you, anymore” feeling.In This Episode, You'll Learn:Feeling alone and lonely in a relationship is very common (04:44)Complacency can ruin a relationship (05:06)Sensuality and sexuality is a beautiful, powerful, important part of who we are as a couple (06:34)50% of second marriages fail because root problems aren't being addressed (07:22)Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl's book Buddha's Bedroom is a great resource!Let's Connect! Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here YoutubeIf you want to rate your relationship, take the Passion QuizFollow @drcherylfraser on Instagram Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.