You Love & You Learn Podcast

It's officially wedding week!

Bringing back an oldie but goodie episode this week! Whether you're hearing it for the first time, or if you heard it when it first aired back in February 2023, I hope you will find some nuggets of wisdom to take away. When you're in a relationship, life's big questions present themself: Who I am I? What do I believe? What do I value? How do I want life to look? What is normal? In this episode, I walk through these big life questions and help normalize asking them within the context of a relationship. Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Join the You Love and You Learn Patreon community Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

In this solo episode, I'm sharing what it's looked like to reduce the pressure and urgency I used to bring into two major areas of my life: my relationship and my work. From letting go of perfectionism in partnership, to allowing myself to embrace a season of maintenance in business, this episode is a reflection on how releasing intensity can actually create more ease, connection, and clarity. Whether you're navigating a big life change (like a wedding!) or simply noticing that things feel a little too much lately, this is your invitation to pause and reflect on where you can invite in some compassion and be more gentle with yourself. Mentioned in the episode: Relationship Anxiety Toolkit Wedding Sale Additional resources: Apply for private coaching Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Join the You Love and You Learn Patreon community Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

This week on the podcast I have on Anna Seirian, a writer and coach for ADHD women who want to trade exhaustion and survival for ease and pleasure. She's the writer of the best-selling Substack Ambitious Softie and the cofounder of Internet People, a digital media company and community for creatives, artists, and entrepreneurs. In this episode we dive into the heart of Anna's Brilliance Experiment and how small, intentional actions can reclaim our joy, vitality, and sense of connection to ourselves, which in turn can help us connect to other relationships in our life more intentionally. Anna opens up about how she's been cultivating joy in her life through these simple experiments each week that encourage mindfulness, self-care, and personal growth. Mentioned in the episode: Join the Brilliance Experience on Anna's Substack Anna's Podcast: Internet People Podcast Connect with Anna on Instagram Anna's Audio Course - 17 Principles of Soft Ambition The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Join the You Love and You Learn Patreon community Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

I am so grateful to bring on another former client of mine to discuss her transformative journey with relationship anxiety. In this episode we explore: How the need for certainty in her decisions fueled her relationship anxiety The struggle of knowing if it is anxiety or intuition and how to navigate Moving from black and white thinking to accepting things can be “both, and” Ways she works with her anxiety (not against it) as it shows up If you've ever felt stuck in patterns of doubt, fear, or overthinking in your relationship, this conversation will remind you that you're not alone—and that growth is possible. Mentioned in the episode: The Wisdom of Anxiety by Sheryl Paul “Is it Anxiety or Intuition?” Webinar Additional resources: If this conversation resonates, apply for private coaching Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Join the You Love and You Learn Patreon community Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

Have you ever felt stuck in the same relationship patterns, no matter how hard you try to change? This week, I sat down with trauma-informed marriage coach, Becky Aste, to explore how healing yourself can transform your relationship. Becky shares the patterns that nearly led to divorce and how discovering somatic work (aka, soothing your body) changed everything. We discuss how regulating your nervous system, breaking toxic cycles, and shifting from control to connection can create a healthier, more fulfilling partnership Connect with Becky: Becky's Instagram Free Training: “4 Somatic Secrets to Secure Love” Podcast: Your Breakthrough Blueprint Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Join the You Love and You Learn Patreon community Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

In this episode, I'm exploring a topic that can sometimes feel a little uncomfy—but is super important to talk about: the role alcohol plays in romantic relationships. This discussion was inspired by a question from a Patreon member, but I know many other people navigate similar dynamics in their relationships. I share my personal experiences with this topic, including how alcohol has impacted my relationship with Nate, my past anxieties around it, the boundaries we've set, and open conversations we've had in order to create a mutual understanding around our alcohol consumption. Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Join the You Love and You Learn Patreon community Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

The Messy Middle — a space we all find ourselves in at some point. It's that uncomfortable, uncertain period where things feel unclear, and we're searching for answers that don't seem to come. In this solo episode, I open up about my own experience with navigating uncertainty, feeling stuck, and provide practical ways to support yourself when you don't have a clear path forward. Mentioned in the episode: Anxiety Rx by Dr. Russell Kennedy, M.D. The Wisdom of Anxiety by Sheryl Paul Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Join the You Love and You Learn Patreon community Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

In this episode, I sit down with life and manifestation coach, Samantha Chung, to explore how to overcome anxiety, relinquish control, and create inner peace. Sam shares her personal story—from her early struggles with perfectionism and control as a professional ballerina to discovering the power of mindfulness, self-acceptance, and manifestation. This episode is for anyone who struggles with overthinking, self-doubt, or the need to control every aspect of life. Join us as we dive into how to embrace all emotions and learn to live in the present moment (instead of an unknown future). Mentioned in the episode: Listen to Samantha's Podcast, Spiraling Higher Connect with Samantha on Instagram and TikTok Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Join the You Love and You Learn Patreon community Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

Ready for a real conversation about sex? This week, I'm joined by sex expert Susan Bratton to explore the path to a more fulfilling sex life. We unpack the importance of open communication and how to overcome the misconceptions that are holding you back from passionate and connected sex. Discover how to take ownership of your own pleasure and build a stronger bond with your partner to unlock the best sex of your life (even if that's something that currently feels intimidating). Mentioned in the episode: Susan's Website Connect with Susan on Instagram Susan's Youtube Channel Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Join the You Love and You Learn Patreon community Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

I know many listeners have felt the urge to escape a perfectly good relationship. This can show up as questioning if you're making a mistake, if you're truly in love, or if you're missing out on something better. I went through it too, so just know you are not alone. I am bringing back OCD and Anxiety coach Robert James to share his journey with Relationship OCD and to unpack why our brains can send us into panic mode in relationships. We discuss: How rumination and overthinking can keep you stuck The role of self-compassion in overcoming relationship anxiety Why vulnerability and presence are key to healthy love Practical steps to break free from the cycle of doubt Here is the first episode I did with Robert (#52) if you missed that one (it's a goodie!): Spotify link: https://open.spotify.com/episode/3pbH7OXf0MFcV4pqoXfbUM?si=0b9fd7ef499c4ed8 Apple link: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/52-leaning-into-discomfort-in-your-relationship-w-robert/id1654761308?i=1000640294215 Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Join the You Love and You Learn Patreon community Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

Bringing back an oldie but goodie episode this week! Whether you're hearing it for the first time, or if you heard it when it first aired back in February 2023, I hope you will find some nuggets of wisdom to take away. When anxiety shows up, it can feel tempting to want to make it go away as fast as possible. I've found this can actually make the anxiety stronger, and offer up 5 alternate ways to respond next time anxiety shows up. “Is it anxiety or incompatibility? webinar mentioned in the episode: https://youloveandyoulearn.com/ra-or-incompatibility-webinar — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

Bringing back an oldie but goodie episode this week! Whether you're hearing it for the first time, or if you heard it when it first aired back in January 2023, I hope you will find some nuggets of wisdom to take away. Is there such thing as the “right relationship?” Why is this such a common question we ask ourselves? How do we expand into a new way of thinking? I dive into my thoughts on this subject and how to think about our relationship in a way that is less anxiety-inducing. In the podcast, I mention relationship incompatibilities, and if you're looking to answer the question “is it anxiety or incompatibility?” in your healthy relationship with more confidence, check out my 2-hour webinar on this for $27. CLICK HERE TO CHECK IT OUT — Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Join the You Love and You Learn Patreon community Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

We are heading into Valentine's Day month and there will be a ton of messages about having your romantic partner meeting your needs and showering you with love and gifts. While it's lovely to celebrate our love for people in our life–it's also important to celebrate the love we give ourselves. Part of how we can give and receive love for ourselves and become our own best friend, our own inner loving parents, or the main character of our life is to intentionally practice filling up our cup. Intentionally taking time to nourish your mind, body, heart, and soul–vs. waiting for someone else to do it for you. It doesn't mean we stop relying on others, but it means we take responsibility for our own fulfillment and wellbeing. Next week I am hosting a 7-Day Challenge, Filling Your Own Cup, inside the You Love and You Learn Patreon community! We'll go through how to define your needs (what fills your cup), how to meet your needs without crazy pressure and strict rules, how to prioritize yourself, and how to become flexible in meeting your needs as you evolve as a person. Today's episode gives you a sneak-peek into Day 1 of the Filling Your Own Cup challenge. Join here for just $7/month! (cancel anytime) Join the Patreon here: https://www.patreon.com/YouLoveandYouLearn Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

Reading fiction can be relaxing–unless we're stuck comparing our lives and relationship to the ones in the books! Then it can become stressful. Just know you are not alone if you feel this way–this episode topic was highly requested from other members of the You Love and You Learn community after I posted about fiction recently! In today's episode, I explore three reasons why comparison to fiction books is unhelpful (because of all or nothing thinking, because romanticism in and of itself isn't a sustainable goal, and because taking on other's stories as our own puts us in reactive mode) and I give you mindset shifts and tips to help you feel more comfortable reading fiction again. Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Join the You Love and You Learn Patreon community Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

In today's episode, I sat down with Alena Winter, a clinical Naturopath and Nutritionist in New Zealand who is passionate about helping people understand true foundations of health and the things we need in place to be well. The good news? Many of these pillars of health are simple, accessible, and low cost–yet they can make a world of a difference in how we feel on a day to day basis. We discuss: What the nervous system is and how it influences us (Alena's explanation is so simple!) Why is it important to begin to understand our window of tolerance, and how to know if we've gone outside of it Why nervous system awareness helps us as individuals Why nervous system awareness helps our relationships How we can co-regulate with other people in our lives Tools to support your nervous system in the day to day and in relationships For more of Alena's work, check out: Her free nervous system regulation guide: https://alenawinter.co.nz/free-regulation-guide Her Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alenawinternaturalhealth Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Join the You Love and You Learn Patreon community Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

Have you ever felt pressure to “just be grateful”? Maybe you have sat down to write a gratitude list before, but it took you a while to think of things about your life, your relationship, your partner–and you felt guilty about it; “shouldn't I be more grateful?!” In this week's episode, I sit down with Karden Rabin, nervous system expert to explore a new perspective on gratitude that will (hopefully) help you feel way less pressure and approach it from a more compassionate lens. This was a big shift for me when I first heard Karden explain it, and I am grateful for him sharing with the You Love and You Learn community! For more of Karden's work: His website: www.somiainternational.com His Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kardenrabin/?hl=en Somia International Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/somiainternational/?hl=en Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Join the You Love and You Learn Patreon community Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

Having a strong mindset in relationships can be a big game-changer. Our mindset affects the way we think, feel, and behave–so it makes a big difference if we come from a mindset of “why bother?” (victim mindset) or “I can't change anyway” (fixed mindset) as compared to a mindset of “I can influence my life and relationship (creator mindset) or “I am not there yet–but I am getting there” (growth mindset). And this January, I am going to be focused on helping you strengthen your relationship mindset! Strengthening my mindset has helped me go from feeling stuck and helpless to empowered and confident in my relationship. (No, not 100% of the time, not perfectly–but enough to make a difference!) Today's episode gives you an exciting sneak-peek into Day 1 of my upcoming 7-Day Challenge: Strengthening Your Relationship Mindset in 2025. The challenge is taking place inside the You Love and You Learn Patreon membership, and you can join here for just $7/month! Join the Patreon here: https://www.patreon.com/YouLoveandYouLearn Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

Nate and I celebrated 8 years together yesterday, and I wanted to take some time to reflect on what I've learned in our time together. The 8 lessons I explore in more detail are: The more we resist feeling “bad”—the more we suffer. The more we accept feeling “bad”—the sooner it will come and go It's much easier to look at the ways our partner is lacking than to turn inward and see our own shortcomings Don't sweep things under the rug, but don't spend excessive time thinking and thinking and thinking about them either Make the unspoken spoken Trust that your partner has positive or neutral intentions–they are not trying to hurt you Wedding planning doesn't have to be stressful or magical, it can be whatever you make it. The messy, boring, hard moments don't make it to someone's social media page 99% of the time—but they're part of being human. Instead of trying to “be more loving” to others—be compassionate towards the barriers in your heart. This in and of itself is an act of love and will help you soften Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Join the You Love and You Learn Patreon community Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

I am so excited to bring you this conversation with Dr. Courtney Paré, a licensed naturopathic doctor, holistic anxiety coach, speaker, and author. Courtney empowers those facing anxiety and OCD to experience greater peace and confidence in their lives and relationships, and just published her first book Overcoming Relationship Anxiety! I had a chance to read the book and it's fantastic. I know this resource and the wisdom Courtney shares in this episode will be useful for anyone who experiences relationship anxiety. For more of Courtney's work: Get Overcoming Relationship Anxiety here Check out her website here Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Join the You Love and You Learn Patreon community Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

I can't believe we're already at episode 100 of this podcast! After sitting down with 50 guests, there were many lessons learned about love that I wanted to recap and share–so I went back and listened to the final question I ask all guests; “what is one thing you have learned about love that you want to leave listeners with?” I found that there were 7 key categories of these lessons, so I went more into depth about each one and am sharing the key ideas from my wise guests over the last couple years. The 7 key categories were: Love is a choice, commitment, action, and something you build Embrace your unique relationship and unique partner, your love does not have to be one-size-fits all Love is something we can create from within, if we are blocked from our inner love it may be due to fear Self-love and building a relationship with yourself helps you relate to others Love is not always easy, but it's rewarding, nourishing, and worth it Love is quiet and stable, not a rollercoaster Love and relating to others means communicating openly and staying curious about your partner as the relationship evolves To those who have listened to the podcast–THANK YOU!! Cheers to the next 100 episodes. Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Join the You Love and You Learn Patreon community Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

In this episode I am back with past guest, Ela Topcuoglu, who is a Life Transition Coach that helps us intentionally move through life's big milestone moments (that can often be challenging for someone with anxiety). Things like moving in together, getting engaged, a breakup, changing jobs, or looking ahead to marriage. One stage of transitions in particular, the limbo stage (in between the old life and the new) can be particularly uncomfortable and confusing, so Ela is back to explore: A quick refresher on the three phases of transition and why limbo is so pivotal What the limbo stage is and why it can feel harder than expected Common mistakes people make when navigating identity shifts during transitions How to intentionally approach the uncertainty of the limbo phase The hidden blessings of this stage that often go unnoticed If you've ever felt stuck between where you were and where you're going, this episode is for you! For more of Ela's work: Check our her Limbo worksheet here Check out her website here Check out her Instagram here Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Join the You Love and You Learn Patreon community Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

In this episode, I sit down with Lily Sais, a former school psychologist turned registered Three Principles practitioner, whose journey has taken her from anxiety to a place of peace. Lily is passionate about helping others uncover the peace that already lies within them, beneath anxious thoughts (the peace that already lies within…LOVE!) We cover: Why it's important to stop focusing on what's wrong with you Why seeking more information is not always useful How we can release the need to think and do more An analogy of anxious thoughts like a snow globe Lily's powerful definition of love …and more! For more of Lily's work: https://www.peace-from-within.com/pfwcommunity https://www.instagram.com/_peacefromwithin/ Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Join the You Love and You Learn Patreon community Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

Over the years, there is a recurring ‘theme' that brings up discomfort for me within my relationship, and that is when things feel boring or mundane. It used to really freak me out, and I would jump to thinking I had to go find a more exciting partner or relationship. I still have these moments of judging the boredom, but when I pause to reflect further, I see things a little differently now: as a chance to pour into my life more intentionally, vs. placing the relationship or Nate on a pedestal. In this episode, I explore how I am setting intentions this winter to intentionally show up for myself and nurture 3 key areas: My inner life My values My personal interests These are 3 key areas that Robert Johnson shares in his book (We: Understanding the Psychology of Romantic Love) to take the projection off our partner to complete us and make us whole. Excited to share this with you so you can take the time to reflect on these key areas, too! Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Join the You Love and You Learn Patreon community Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

This is a long overdue episode to explore signs of what an abusive relationship is and isn't. I often give the disclaimer “my work does not apply to abusive relationships” and wanted to have a licensed therapist explain the types of abuse so people are aware. And who better than Dr. Molly Burrets, a licensed clinical psychologist based in Los Angeles with 15 years of experience practicing psychotherapy, conducting research, and teaching at the undergraduate and graduate levels. In the episode, we mentioned resources for people experiencing abuse in an intimate relationship: peaceoverviolence.org Rape, Abuse, Incest National Network (RAINN) – 800.656.HOPE (4673) National Domestic Violence Hotline – 800.799.SAFE (7233), 800.787.3224 TDD Books: The Verbally Abusive Relationship: How to Recognize It and How to Respond by Patricia Evans The Dance of Anger: A Woman's Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships by Harriet Lerner The Emotionally Abused Woman: Overcoming Destructive Patterns and Reclaiming Yourself by Beverly Engel The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van der Kolk For more of Molly's work, check out: www.drmollyburrets.com www.instagram.com/drmollyburrets

In this episode, I unpack the phrase “when you know you know” and how I used to take this phrase very literally, which caused a lot of anxiety and pressure on me. I deconstruct what it actually means to ‘know' something or have ‘knowledge', as well as the characteristics of someone who is more likely to ‘know' something within their relationship or life. If you've ever heard someone say they “just knew” their partner was the one and felt crappy about it (“what do they know, and how do they know it?!”) – this episode is for you! Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Join the You Love and You Learn Patreon community Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

Does it feel like you're doing all the ‘right' things but you're still not happy? Does it feel like everyone around you seems to be happier than you, and you feel so guilty about it? What if this wasn't a flaw or something you're doing wrong – and we have been getting happiness wrong all along? In this episode, I sat down with Stephanie Harrison of @newhappyco to explore what happiness is and isn't, and how we can take small steps to become more happy and fulfilled in our lives. For more of Stephanie and New Happy, check out: www.thenewhappy.com – Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Join the You Love and You Learn Patreon community Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

n this episode, MJ and I discuss why lowering the bar in your life and relationship might actually be a good thing. No, this isn't about settling or letting go of standards. It's about moving forward without beating yourself up for every imperfection along the way, and taking small intentional actions instead of waiting for everything to perfectly line up before you can move forward. This is the permission slip I've needed for so many years, and I know it will feel like a breath of fresh air! For more of MJ's work: The Perfectionist's Guide to Taking Action on Creative Ideas audio class Sign up for the Internet People newsletter here Check out her Instgaram – Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Join the You Love and You Learn Patreon community Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

In this episode, I explore the common struggle of wanting anxiety to disappear and how this often makes the anxiety feel even stronger. Many people ask, “Why is my anxiety still here even after I've tried all the tools?” – let's discuss a helpful shift in mindset that can transform your relationship with it. I cover: The nature of anxiety and why resisting it can make it feel stronger How to reframe your motivation behind coping tools and strategies Why viewing anxiety as a "roommate" rather than a "guest” can lead to a more peaceful coexistence …and more! – Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Join the You Love and You Learn Patreon community Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

I've never done this before, but today I am bringing you a training from my Patreon membership to the podcast to show you a peek into the types of trainings we have every month! This month's topic: wanting to stay in your relationship, but knowing you want things to be better or different, too. If you want to dive into a library of trainings like this, and connect with 300+ others on a journey to become more secure… Join the You Love and You Learn Patreon community – Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Join the You Love and You Learn Patreon community Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

In this episode, Chelsea and I dive into the idea that true relationship strength often comes from embracing differences rather than being exactly the same. We cover: Chelsea's journey of overcoming internalized beliefs that partners must think alike How she learned to appreciate her husband's contrasting qualities How differences can nurture a deeper love, personal growth, and a more expansive understanding of what it means to truly connect with someone …and more For more of Chelsea's work Website: www.healingembodied.com IG & TikTok: @healing.embodied – Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

It can feel so painful to be disconnected from your partner. I get it, because I've had a few of these moments myself recently! Let's talk about it. In this episode, I share: Recent examples when Nate and I felt disconnected Why it feels so painful to be disconnected from your partner 5 ways to respond next time you're disconnected 7 helpful mindsets around disconnection + connection to help you feel more empowered – Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

This episode focuses on healing anxiety from the inside out. And who better to speak to than Alison Seponara – therapist, anxiety educator, holistic healer, and author who specializes in helping others create their own holistic anxiety healing toolkit! Anxiety can come from many different pillars of our life; our friendships, our physical health and wellbeing, our relational attachment dynamics, our mental patterns, and so much more. Alison and I cover each of these topics and offer bite-sized tips to healing anxiety. For more of Alison's work: Alison's website Alison's books Alison's Instagram – Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

You are in for a TREAT with this episode, which truly felt like a therapy session for me. I sat down with Thais Gibson who has over a decade working as a practitioner and specializes in blending attachment theory, psychology, and subconscious reprogramming. We discuss what Thais refers to as the “relationship shadow” and explore why our partners can be so dang triggering (it's not what you think!) and how to navigate these triggers more mindfully. For more about Thais, check out: Website: https://university.personaldevelopmentschool.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool Learning Love book: https://attachment.personaldevelopmentschool.com/learning-love Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thepersonaldevelopmentschool/ — Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

Have you ever felt like you were not going “fast enough” in your journey to heal relationship anxiety or ROCD? Maybe you've seen other people share their wins and felt like you're just not getting it. It's easy to beat ourselves up when we compare to other people's highlight reels–but today I am peeling back the curtain of what healing relationship anxiety actually looks like. Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! — Montage Fallacy article by Herbert Lui Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

If you are the partner of someone with relationship anxiety, this episode is for you. If you have relationship anxiety and want to be able to ask your partner for more intentional support, this episode is for you! Thank you to the help of the You Love and You Learn community on Instagram for this episode. I received dozens of answers to the question “how does your partner help you navigate relationship anxiety?” to influence this episode. I cover: How to help a partner with relationship anxiety What to say and what not to say when they're in an anxiety spike Setting boundaries to protect your own energy Is giving reassurance helpful, or not? …and more PS–the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit is LIVE! You can get it here. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

If you have ever felt like your healthy relationship is boring and the “vibes are off” – this episode is for you! I sat down with Dr. Morgan Anderson, a clinical psychologist, relationship coach, and host of the “Let's Get Vulnerable” podcast. In this episode we discuss: Why Morgan rejected, sabotaged, and avoided available love for so long What emotional availability looks like What happens when we prioritize vibes, spark, chemistry 3 reasons why we sabotage healthy relationships …and more. For more of Morgan's work, check out: Her Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drmorgancoaching/ Her free resource: Www.drmorgancoaching.com/gift — If you're loving the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

I loved this conversation because time and time again this comes up in the work I do with clients (and it was a pattern in my own relationship). I sat down with Charisse Cooke, who is a London-based relationship psychotherapist with over 20 years experience. She helps individuals, couples and groups develop relationship skills and define love in a way that has meaning for them. In this episode we discuss: what love addiction is and how we can take the thrill of the chase to extremes what happens when we put our partner on a pedestal and have an idealized version of them the question “do I love them, or am I just attached?” what love is and what love isn't so we can be more mindful how our expectations and past traumas create certain patterns on our relationship …and more. For more of Charisse's work, check out: Her Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/charissecooke/ Her website: www.charissecooke.com — If you're loving the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

Do you ever notice yourself feeling good, then suddenly an anxious voice pops up saying “wait, shouldn't I be worrying about something?” or “if I don't worry about this–how will I figure it out?” I've been here, and I used to sabotage most of my good feelings by jumping straight back into worry. In this episode, I explore: Why fear can try to block us from experiencing joy What patterns to look for (worry withdrawals, resistance) How to respond to these patterns differently and widen your tolerance for joy PS–be sure to join my Instagram broadcast channel lovin' and learnin' for the latest updates on a new exciting offering I have coming soon. — If you're loving the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

In this episode, I share my personal journey from getting engaged (June 2023) to planning my wedding (in May 2025). Thanks to great questions from the You Love and You Learn community…I discuss: How to enjoy your engagement phase before and during wedding planning What I've learned about my personality during this time How to accept the moments when you felt stressed or overwhelmed by the planning / decisions How to make decisions about the wedding itself without worrying there is a better option out there that would make you happier on the day How not to get overwhelmed at the thought of spending forever with someone — If you're loving the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

You asked…we're answering! Alexandra Schelling (of @toolboxforlove on Instagram) and I polled our communities for questions about navigating our significant other's families, and we're answering the questions in a two-part episode. Today's episode is all about navigating relational dynamics with our partner's family. Should we set boundaries with our partner's family? Should they? How to navigate with family's criticism? How to create connection with in-laws? We explore all of these topics and how to respond to them more mindfully. For more of Alexandra's work, check out: Her Instagram Her YouTube — If you're loving the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

You asked…we're answering! Alexandra Schelling (of @toolboxforlove on Instagram) and I polled our communities for questions about navigating our significant other's families, and we're answering the questions in a two-part episode. Today's episode is all about what's happening in our OWN mind when it relates to our partner's family. Expectation vs. reality (and the anxiety that causes), insecurities when we compare to other people's relationships with their in-laws, and feeling triggered by specific interactions. We explore all of these topics and how to respond to them more mindfully. Stay tuned next week for part two about setting boundaries with in-laws! For more of Alexandra's work, check out: Her Instagram Her YouTube — If you're loving the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

his episode is a long-time coming, one I have been so excited to record and share with you because I wish more people knew this information! Menstrual cycles can have such a huge effect on how we're showing up throughout the month, and if we don't know what to expect…we can feel a lil' crazy or guilty about the changes in energy, mindset, and emotions. So I brought Ash McDonald, Therapeutic Business and Life Mentor, on the show who is someone that went through her own journey with cycle syncing after feeling burnt out during her third pregnancy and having hope that there was a better way to live her life and show up for her loved ones. For more of Ash's work and the Flow Lab course she mentioned in the episode: FLOW LAB LINK SHAMELESSLY AMBITIOUS PODCAST WEBSITE — If you're loving the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

I was pleasantly surprised when I listened to a podcast with James Sexton, a divorce lawyer who's seen the ups and downs of couples for 25+ years in his career and has a lot of wisdom to share from it. Today's episode focuses on a key thing he sees that leads to relationship breakdown: 1. Not knowing what you want or need, and 2. Not knowing how to express what you want or need. I explore different categories that it can be helpful to explore your needs in, two book recommendations to help you get started, and tips for HOW to communicate needs in a helpful way. If you want to explore this more in private coaching… Sign up here. If you're loving the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. Books mentioned in the episode: Eight Dates by John and Julie Gottman Hold Me Tight by Sue Johnson *Amazon affiliate links — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

This simple reframe has helped me (and dozens of my clients) in moments of relationship anxiety: zooming in when you're thinking too big-picture, and zooming out when you're hyper-fixated on something in the present moment. I explain why this matters in your relationship and specific examples of zooming in and out to help manage your anxiety. If you're loving the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

This topic is LONG overdue, and that is feeling unworthy and how this affects our life and the ways we show up in our relationships. I'm thrilled to have had the chance to speak with Sarah Baldwin, who is a Somatic Experiencing Practitioner and expert in the field of trauma resolution. We explore reasons we feel unworthy, how to become kinder to ourselves, how to reconnect with our body if we've been stuck up in the mind our whole life, what it means to be connected to your ‘truth,' and more. For more of Sarah's work: https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/worktogether — If you're loving the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

Are you clear about what your needs are in a relationship? If so, do you communicate them openly with your partner? If you answered no to either question, you'll enjoy this conversation. Our partners cannot read our minds, especially if we are not even sure what we're expecting in the first place, so it's important to take time to think about these things. To explore this, I chatted with Gayane Aramyan, a marriage and family therapist who specializes in perinatal mental health support for women and couples. She's been with her husband for 15 years and has learned a lot along the way of how to continue to speak up for your needs (and clear out resentments) through lifes' transitions (including becoming parents). For more of Gayane's work: https://www.therapywithgayane.com/ https://www.instagram.com/therapywithgayane/ — If you're loving the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

Common questions I am asked are “what if I never had a honeymoon phase?” and “is it bad if I've had relationship anxiety/ROCD from the beginning of my relationship?” My two cents is how long we've had RA/ROCD is less relevant than what is contributing to the RA/ROCD…and that's exactly what I explore in this episode! What factors may have contributed to RA/ROCD being there from the beginning, and how to move forward if this is your experience. If you're loving the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

Have you ever felt bored in your relationship and worried that something is wrong? Maybe you've wondered “is this normal, shouldn't things feel more exciting than this?” I've been there, and this has been a trigger I have struggled with myself, so I wanted to explore it more. In this episode, I explore: 3 reasons why healthy love can feel boring What inner work you can do if you feel disappointed by boredom What actions you can take in your relationship if you feel bored If you're loving the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

It can be so hard to trust ourselves when there is so much relationship information and advice out there. Even well-meaning friends and family can add their two cents when sometimes, we really didn't need it! In this episode, I sat down with a client of mine who shares her journey of trusting her intuition in her first serious relationship. We also explore the fear of being attracted to other people and how to discern if you should listen to other people's advice. To get access to the “Is it Anxiety, or Intuition?” webinar that's mentioned in the episode… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

Today we're diving into something that has a big impact on our overall mental health and wellbeing; our vagus nerve. Amanda Armstrong, neuroscience and trauma-informed anxiety & depression coach (and now AUTHOR!) is back on the podcast to help walk us through how to improve our mental health by working with our vagus nerve - the nerve that connects our brain and body, and regulates our nervous system. Amanda has so much wisdom to share (check out episode 50 in case you have not heard that one yet) and I was very excited to bring her back for another conversation. To order Healing the Vagus Nerve book and dive more into Amanda's world: Order Healing the Vagus Nerve on Amazon (here) Website: https://www.riseaswe.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amandaontherise/?hl=en — If you're enjoying the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram