Podcast appearances and mentions of michael bader

Gospodarski potencijal digitalnih nomada, tj. osoba koji veći dio svog radnog života provode tamo gdje drugi obično putuju na odmor, otkrile su i turističke zemlje Sredozemlja. Nenad Kreizer i Filip Slavković pojašnjavaju što je i tko je zapravo digitalni nomad? Opet neki trend za razmažene milenijalce-influensere? Po čemu se ovaj fenomen razlikuje od rada od kuće? O tome kako Crna Gora pokušava iskoristiti ovaj trend razgovaramo s Michaelom Baderom, stručnjakom za turizam s bazom u Crnoj Gori. Von Nenad Kreizer.

Multinationale Unternehmen werden immer mächtiger und steigern ihre Profite, auch in Zeiten von Krieg, Klima- und Coronakrise. Was bedeutet diese Macht für die Geltung der universalen Menschenrechte? Wie lässt sich diese Macht rechtlich einhegen und ist die liberale Rechtsordnung dazu geeignet? Philipp hat über diese Fragen und aktuelle Fälle mit Michael Bader, Bertha Justice Fellow am ECCHR, gesprochen. Isabel erklärt im Grundlagenteil die UN Guiding Principles on Business and Human Rights und was diese mit Katzen zu tun haben. Wir freuen uns über Lob, Anmerkungen und Kritik an podcast@voelkerrechtsblog.org. Abonniert unseren Podcast via RSS, über Spotify oder überall dort, wo es Podcasts gibt. Es gibt nun die Möglichkeit, auf diesen Plattformen den Völkerrechtspodcast zu bewerten, wir freuen uns sehr über 5 Sterne! Hintergrundinformationen: UN Guiding Principles on Business and Human Rights Business and Human Rights Resource Centre The Corporation (Film) Peter Muchlinski, Multinational Enterprises and the Law (OUP 2021) Grietje Baars, The Corporation, Law and Capitalism (Brill 2019) Moderation: Philipp Eschenhagen & Erik Tuchtfeld Grundlagen: Isabel Lischewski Interview: Michael Bader & Philipp Eschenhagen Schnitt: Daniela Rau Credits: Hubertus Heil, Sorgfaltspflichten in Lieferketten, Bundestag, 11. Juni 2021) John Ruggie, Business and Human Rights Panel, OHCHR, 29. Juni 2021

#10 The German colonial period (1884-1920) led and still leads to immense losses of lives, land, resources and sovereignty. To this day, thousands of human remains that were gathered in colonial exploits all over the world can be found in German museums and archives. For many descendants, the continued storage of their ancestors without the consent of the deceased or their families and without proper burial remains a pressing concern. In this episode, ECCHR's Michael Bader and Sarah Imani are joined by activist Mnyaka Sururu Mboro (Berlin Postkolonial) and curator and artist Nathalie Anguezomo Mba Bikoro to discuss the posthumous right to human dignity, the importance of legal restitution, and creating a space for mourning. How can artistic and legal activism support each other in accounting for Germany's violent colonial history and dismantling enduring structures of colonial oppression? Read on for more information and the report We want them back by Isabelle Reimann.

Un podcast sui più importanti titoli di cinema BDSM, riletti attraverso il libro "Eccitazione" di Michael Bader.

Michael Bader, the author of the book Arousal: The Secret Logic of Sexual Fantasies joins me in a fascinating conversation about sexual fantasies. We get to hear his ideas about sexual fantasies and what they mean. Decoding Sexual Fantasies Michael recognized the need for an applicable approach to sexual fantasies to help patients with their shame and guilt surrounding their sexual fantasies and preferences. His arguments originated from a theory from Joseph Weiss. Michael argues that sexual fantasies are constructed to express our sexual desires and arousals in a way that is acceptable to our guilty conscience. Michael gives an instance of dominance and submission, and the fantasy of having or giving up control over our sexual stimulation. That control could look like a masochistic fantasy or desiring partners with a rough exterior or self-centered. Curating this fantasy is exciting because ‘they don't have to feel guilty about hurting the other person.' A person assuming the role of a dominant knows that they are going to assume control over this person and that person would feel aroused by it and not be hurt and the same goes for the person assuming the submissive role. This fantasy dissolves the guilt of hurting each other. Sexual fantasies are strategies that our mind unconsciously develops to allow us to free our sexual excitement from things like guilt. The Purpose of Sexual Fantasies and their role Michael believes a person's sexual fantasies act as a window into their unconscious psyche. When a person harbors feelings of guilt, shame, or responsibility for another person's wellbeing, it inhibits the person's sexual desires and thus resulting in the development of sexual fantasies to avoid such feelings. These inhibited sexual desires can interfere with other aspects of life. In the consulting room, when we analyze these sexual fantasies what we discover is “the revelation of someone's core beliefs'', which show up in the other parts of life and not just sexually. Analyzing these sexual fantasies can help the patient's guilt and shame around their desires and also inspect the roots of their beliefs that caused their sexual fantasies. Sexual Fantasies Are Not Meant To Be Changed As long as there's an innate need for attachment, the feelings of worry, care, responsibility, and guilt towards loved ones will be present. These needs tend to almost always show up in people's sex lives. There won't ever be a time where people will stop feeling these that stem from our core needs. And since sexual fantasies arise to overcome those feelings, they will always be needed as a way to express our sexual desires. Are there Problematic Fantasies? Every fantasy is enjoyed by somebody. Porn has tons of types of pornography for every population and some of the unpopular categories wouldn't exist if there weren't people to consume it. The problems with these fantasies coming true are they produce porn and sex addicts that take people away from being emotionally and sexually present in relationships and marriages. These fantasies could be anything. Talking about limits to our sexual fantasy, Michael says, unless our sexual fantasies take us away from being psychologically present, being aligned with our values, and doing something meaningful from other people, sexual fantasies are not problematic. Michael also believes sexual fantasies that are illegal in reality are not problematic to think about unless they're acted even slightly in any way. Biography Michael Bader, DMH is a psychologist and psychoanalyst with over 40 years of clinical experience in the San Francisco Bay Area. He has written extensively about the interaction of psychology, culture, and politics and has produced a podcast – Mysteries of the Mind—about these issues. He is the author of Arousal: The Secret Logic of Sexual Fantasies, and Male Sexuality: Why Women Don't Understand It, and Men Don't Either. Resources and Links: Website: https://michaelbader.com/ Books: https://michaelbader.com/books/ Other Publications: https://michaelbader.com/writings/ More info: Training video – https://jessazimmerman.mykajabi.com/video-choice Sex Health Quiz – https://www.sexhealthquiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywitheasemethod.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Access the Free webinar: How to help your partner want more sex without making them feel pressured or obligated: https://intimacywithease.com/free-webinar Better Sex with Jessa Zimmerman https://businessinnovatorsradio.com/better-sex/ Source: https://businessinnovatorsradio.com/179-the-logic-of-our-fantasies-with-michael-baderMore info and resources: How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: How to make sex easy and fun for both of you: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast

Michael Bader, the author of the book Arousal: The Secret Logic of Sexual Fantasies joins me in a fascinating conversation about sexual fantasies. We get to hear his ideas about sexual fantasies and what they mean.Decoding Sexual FantasiesMichael recognized the need for an applicable approach to sexual fantasies to help patients with their shame and guilt surrounding their sexual fantasies and preferences. His arguments originated from a theory from Joseph Weiss. Michael argues that sexual fantasies are constructed to express our sexual desires and arousals in a way that is acceptable to our guilty conscience.Michael gives an instance of dominance and submission, and the fantasy of having or giving up control over our sexual stimulation. That control could look like a masochistic fantasy or desiring partners with a rough exterior or self-centered. Curating this fantasy is exciting because ‘they don’t have to feel guilty about hurting the other person.’ A person assuming the role of a dominant knows that they are going to assume control over this person and that person would feel aroused by it and not be hurt and the same goes for the person assuming the submissive role. This fantasy dissolves the guilt of hurting each other. Sexual fantasies are strategies that our mind unconsciously develops to allow us to free our sexual excitement from things like guilt.The Purpose of Sexual Fantasies and their roleMichael believes a person’s sexual fantasies act as a window into their unconscious psyche. When a person harbors feelings of guilt, shame, or responsibility for another person’s wellbeing, it inhibits the person’s sexual desires and thus resulting in the development of sexual fantasies to avoid such feelings. These inhibited sexual desires can interfere with other aspects of life. In the consulting room, when we analyze these sexual fantasies what we discover is “the revelation of someone’s core beliefs’’, which show up in the other parts of life and not just sexually. Analyzing these sexual fantasies can help the patient’s guilt and shame around their desires and also inspect the roots of their beliefs that caused their sexual fantasies.Sexual Fantasies Are Not Meant To Be ChangedAs long as there’s an innate need for attachment, the feelings of worry, care, responsibility, and guilt towards loved ones will be present. These needs tend to almost always show up in people’s sex lives. There won’t ever be a time where people will stop feeling these that stem from our core needs. And since sexual fantasies arise to overcome those feelings, they will always be needed as a way to express our sexual desires.Are there Problematic Fantasies?Every fantasy is enjoyed by somebody. Porn has tons of types of pornography for every population and some of the unpopular categories wouldn’t exist if there weren’t people to consume it. The problems with these fantasies coming true are they produce porn and sex addicts that take people away from being emotionally and sexually present in relationships and marriages. These fantasies could be anything.Talking about limits to our sexual fantasy, Michael says, unless our sexual fantasies take us away from being psychologically present, being aligned with our values, and doing something meaningful from other people, sexual fantasies are not problematic. Michael also believes sexual fantasies that are illegal in reality are not problematic to think about unless they’re acted even slightly in any way.BiographyMichael Bader, DMH is a psychologist and psychoanalyst with over 40 years of clinical experience in the San Francisco Bay Area. He has written extensively about the interaction of psychology, culture, and politics and has produced a podcast – Mysteries of the Mind—about these issues. He is the author of Arousal: The Secret Logic of Sexual Fantasies, and Male Sexuality: Why Women Don’t Understand It, and Men Don’t Either.Resources and Links:Website: https://michaelbader.com/Books: https://michaelbader.com/books/Other Publications: https://michaelbader.com/writings/More info:Training video – https://jessazimmerman.mykajabi.com/video-choiceSex Health Quiz – https://www.sexhealthquiz.comThe Course – https://www.intimacywitheasemethod.comThe Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.comAccess the Free webinar: How to help your partner want more sex without making them feel pressured or obligated: https://intimacywithease.com/free-webinarBetter Sex with Jessa Zimmermanhttps://businessinnovatorsradio.com/better-sex/Source: https://businessinnovatorsradio.com/179-the-logic-of-our-fantasies-with-michael-bader

Michael Bader, the author of the book Arousal: The Secret Logic of Sexual Fantasies joins me in a fascinating conversation about sexual fantasies. We get to hear his ideas about sexual fantasies and what they mean.Decoding Sexual FantasiesMichael recognized the need for an applicable approach to sexual fantasies to help patients with their shame and guilt surrounding their sexual fantasies and preferences. His arguments originated from a theory from Joseph Weiss. Michael argues that sexual fantasies are constructed to express our sexual desires and arousals in a way that is acceptable to our guilty conscience.Michael gives an instance of dominance and submission, and the fantasy of having or giving up control over our sexual stimulation. That control could look like a masochistic fantasy or desiring partners with a rough exterior or self-centered. Curating this fantasy is exciting because ‘they don’t have to feel guilty about hurting the other person.’ A person assuming the role of a dominant knows that they are going to assume control over this person and that person would feel aroused by it and not be hurt and the same goes for the person assuming the submissive role. This fantasy dissolves the guilt of hurting each other. Sexual fantasies are strategies that our mind unconsciously develops to allow us to free our sexual excitement from things like guilt.The Purpose of Sexual Fantasies and their roleMichael believes a person’s sexual fantasies act as a window into their unconscious psyche. When a person harbors feelings of guilt, shame, or responsibility for another person’s wellbeing, it inhibits the person’s sexual desires and thus resulting in the development of sexual fantasies to avoid such feelings. These inhibited sexual desires can interfere with other aspects of life. In the consulting room, when we analyze these sexual fantasies what we discover is “the revelation of someone’s core beliefs’’, which show up in the other parts of life and not just sexually. Analyzing these sexual fantasies can help the patient’s guilt and shame around their desires and also inspect the roots of their beliefs that caused their sexual fantasies.Sexual Fantasies Are Not Meant To Be ChangedAs long as there’s an innate need for attachment, the feelings of worry, care, responsibility, and guilt towards loved ones will be present. These needs tend to almost always show up in people’s sex lives. There won’t ever be a time where people will stop feeling these that stem from our core needs. And since sexual fantasies arise to overcome those feelings, they will always be needed as a way to express our sexual desires.Are there Problematic Fantasies?Every fantasy is enjoyed by somebody. Porn has tons of types of pornography for every population and some of the unpopular categories wouldn’t exist if there weren’t people to consume it. The problems with these fantasies coming true are they produce porn and sex addicts that take people away from being emotionally and sexually present in relationships and marriages. These fantasies could be anything.Talking about limits to our sexual fantasy, Michael says, unless our sexual fantasies take us away from being psychologically present, being aligned with our values, and doing something meaningful from other people, sexual fantasies are not problematic. Michael also believes sexual fantasies that are illegal in reality are not problematic to think about unless they’re acted even slightly in any way.BiographyMichael Bader, DMH is a psychologist and psychoanalyst with over 40 years of clinical experience in the San Francisco Bay Area. He has written extensively about the interaction of psychology, culture, and politics and has produced a podcast – Mysteries of the Mind—about these issues. He is the author of Arousal: The Secret Logic of Sexual Fantasies, and Male Sexuality: Why Women Don’t Understand It, and Men Don’t Either.Resources and Links:Website: https://michaelbader.com/Books: https://michaelbader.com/books/Other Publications: https://michaelbader.com/writings/More info:Training video – https://jessazimmerman.mykajabi.com/video-choiceSex Health Quiz – https://www.sexhealthquiz.comThe Course – https://www.intimacywitheasemethod.comThe Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.comAccess the Free webinar: How to help your partner want more sex without making them feel pressured or obligated: https://intimacywithease.com/free-webinarBetter Sex with Jessa Zimmermanhttps://businessinnovatorsradio.com/better-sex/Source: https://businessinnovatorsradio.com/179-the-logic-of-our-fantasies-with-michael-bader

Wenn einer eine Reise tut, so kann er was erzählen. Und was, wenn nicht eine aussergewöhnliche, Daseins-verändernde, lebenslange Reise ist das Eltern-Werden. Zu dieser Reise ist Michael Bader gerade aufgebrochen. Für die allererste Episode des PAPodcast, den Piloten, haben wir uns aber noch vor der Geburt getroffen und über Vorfreude, Vorbereitungen und Nestbau unterhalten.

The topic today is eroticism, which is our unique fingerprint of what turns us on. It’s a set of things or the theme of things that really arouses us – that we find highly interesting and erotic. We all have the things that we prefer in sex and things that we find more arousing than others. This is a useful concept and area of inquiry if we’re going to make our sex life as good as we can. Frees Us from Guilt and Shame I find eroticism fascinating. And one of the theories that I subscribe to was developed by Michael Bader, who wrote a great book called Arousal: The Secret Logic of Sexual Fantasies. He talks about how our eroticism, what we find especially arousing, frees us from guilt and shame. It moves those obstacles out of the way so that we can be fully aroused. I give a great example of what Mr. Bader means, and if you are interested in learning more, I highly recommend the book in terms of trying to figure out why exactly does your eroticism exist? What does it absolve you of or relieve for you? Why is Eroticism Important? In some ways, you may have been going along having sex with your partner for a long time. It hasn’t been highly erotic, and it’s been just fine, and that’s part of the problem. We tend, over time, to come down to what a colleague of mine called “lowest common denominator sex.” How do we get to this point and what do we do to move beyond this level? It’s important to understand that maybe there’s room to explore what could reenergize your sex life. We Need More Fuel for the Fire Not only is our sex life becoming a little bit more predictable if we’re with the same partner usually, but we tend to need more fuel on the fire to get aroused or to reach an orgasm as we age, as we have more stress, as we have more responsibilities. So, tapping into our eroticism is a great way to up the stimulation because that is mental stimulation. If you’ve ever heard the saying that our brain is our biggest sex organ, that’s what that means to me. I explain it further during the episode. Mental stimulation has a lot of power. And if we add that, we get our brain engaged and highly charged, and that’s a lot of energy for our sex life. That added stimulation makes it much, much easier to get aroused or reach orgasm, especially as we get older in terms of what we need to really get turned on. Your Eroticism is Revealed in Different Ways If you think about the best sex you’ve ever had or the sex that was the most exciting or what you like to do, that might point you in the direction of what you find highly arousing. A place you could also look is in your reaction to sexual or romantic material. There is so much out there, and we don’t respond equally to all of it. We’re going to be drawn towards things that shine a light on what we find erotic. Watch for those things. And if you haven’t noticed that or you’re not coming across it, maybe seek out some erotic material on purpose and test the waters. Another place you can look for your eroticism is in your sexual fantasies. If you fantasize, or if you could begin to fantasize about purely erotic material, your own creations really reflect your eroticism. This works because we don’t put stuff in there that doesn’t work for us. If you want to examine your sexual fantasies, spend a little bit of time there, maybe write some of these out. That can be a great place to identify the themes of what turns you on. Once You Understand Your Eroticism The next step is to share that with your partner. To learn theirs and to share yours with them. I can’t stress this enough – adopt a stance of curiosity without judgment. Set the stage to have a welcoming conversation and start to explore what really turns you each on without any sense that you must do anything about this yet, or that it means that anything is good or bad. Once you have the sort of common ground and this curiosity, you might share your own fantasies and just delving deeper into what really turns you on. Find the Overlap You come out of this process with a real knowledge of yourself and your partner, and I think you’re going to begin to see the overlap. There’s room to put these together. Now it doesn’t mean that what you find erotic, that what you fantasize about, that you want to do it. I describe different ways you can use erotic energy even if you don’t want to do the things in real life. You’re working with another person whose desires and wishes, and their eroticism also matters. And looking for where you can get overlap and you can play together, and you can harness what is wonderful. Figure Out What Eroticism is for You I can’t stress enough how powerful I think this is and how useful I think it can be in your sex life. And again, not every time you have sex. But it’s nice to have some of this to draw on and to have a little bit of variance in how arousing sex is… like there are places to pull it out and make it hotter. And then there are other times where we just sort of want a simple, moderately warm encounter. Right? They’re all okay, but this gives you some flexibility. I hope you enjoy that and thanks again for listening. More info:Book and New Course – https://sexwithoutstress.comWeb – https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/Sex Health Quiz – http://sexhealthquiz.com/If you’re enjoying the podcast and want to be a part of making sure it continues in the future, consider being a patron. With a small monthly pledge, you can support the costs of putting this show together. For as little as $2 per month, you can get advance access to each episode. For just a bit more, you will receive an advance copy of a chapter of my new book. And for $10 per month, you get all that plus an invitation to an online Q&A chat with me once a quarter. Learn more at https://www.patreon.com/bettersexpodcastBetter Sex with Jessa Zimmermanhttps://businessinnovatorsradio.com/better-sex/

The topic today is eroticism, which is our unique fingerprint of what turns us on. It's a set of things or the theme of things that really arouses us – that we find highly interesting and erotic. We all have the things that we prefer in sex and things that we find more arousing than others. This is a useful concept and area of inquiry if we're going to make our sex life as good as we can. Frees Us from Guilt and Shame I find eroticism fascinating. And one of the theories that I subscribe to was developed by Michael Bader, who wrote a great book called Arousal: The Secret Logic of Sexual Fantasies. He talks about how our eroticism, what we find especially arousing, frees us from guilt and shame. It moves those obstacles out of the way so that we can be fully aroused. I give a great example of what Mr. Bader means, and if you are interested in learning more, I highly recommend the book in terms of trying to figure out why exactly does your eroticism exist? What does it absolve you of or relieve for you? Why is Eroticism Important? In some ways, you may have been going along having sex with your partner for a long time. It hasn't been highly erotic, and it's been just fine, and that's part of the problem. We tend, over time, to come down to what a colleague of mine called “lowest common denominator sex.” How do we get to this point and what do we do to move beyond this level? It's important to understand that maybe there's room to explore what could reenergize your sex life. We Need More Fuel for the Fire Not only is our sex life becoming a little bit more predictable if we're with the same partner usually, but we tend to need more fuel on the fire to get aroused or to reach an orgasm as we age, as we have more stress, as we have more responsibilities. So, tapping into our eroticism is a great way to up the stimulation because that is mental stimulation. If you've ever heard the saying that our brain is our biggest sex organ, that's what that means to me. I explain it further during the episode. Mental stimulation has a lot of power. And if we add that, we get our brain engaged and highly charged, and that's a lot of energy for our sex life. That added stimulation makes it much, much easier to get aroused or reach orgasm, especially as we get older in terms of what we need to really get turned on. Your Eroticism is Revealed in Different Ways If you think about the best sex you've ever had or the sex that was the most exciting or what you like to do, that might point you in the direction of what you find highly arousing. A place you could also look is in your reaction to sexual or romantic material. There is so much out there, and we don't respond equally to all of it. We're going to be drawn towards things that shine a light on what we find erotic. Watch for those things. And if you haven't noticed that or you're not coming across it, maybe seek out some erotic material on purpose and test the waters. Another place you can look for your eroticism is in your sexual fantasies. If you fantasize, or if you could begin to fantasize about purely erotic material, your own creations really reflect your eroticism. This works because we don't put stuff in there that doesn't work for us. If you want to examine your sexual fantasies, spend a little bit of time there, maybe write some of these out. That can be a great place to identify the themes of what turns you on. Once You Understand Your Eroticism The next step is to share that with your partner. To learn theirs and to share yours with them. I can't stress this enough – adopt a stance of curiosity without judgment. Set the stage to have a welcoming conversation and start to explore what really turns you each on without any sense that you must do anything about this yet, or that it means that anything is good or bad. Once you have the sort of common ground and this curiosity, you might share your own fantasies and just delving deeper into what really turns you on. Find the Overlap You come out of this process with a real knowledge of yourself and your partner, and I think you're going to begin to see the overlap. There's room to put these together. Now it doesn't mean that what you find erotic, that what you fantasize about, that you want to do it. I describe different ways you can use erotic energy even if you don't want to do the things in real life. You're working with another person whose desires and wishes, and their eroticism also matters. And looking for where you can get overlap and you can play together, and you can harness what is wonderful. Figure Out What Eroticism is for You I can't stress enough how powerful I think this is and how useful I think it can be in your sex life. And again, not every time you have sex. But it's nice to have some of this to draw on and to have a little bit of variance in how arousing sex is… like there are places to pull it out and make it hotter. And then there are other times where we just sort of want a simple, moderately warm encounter. Right? They're all okay, but this gives you some flexibility. I hope you enjoy that and thanks again for listening. More info: Book and New Course – https://sexwithoutstress.com Web – https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/ Sex Health Quiz – http://sexhealthquiz.com/ If you're enjoying the podcast and want to be a part of making sure it continues in the future, consider being a patron. With a small monthly pledge, you can support the costs of putting this show together. For as little as $2 per month, you can get advance access to each episode. For just a bit more, you will receive an advance copy of a chapter of my new book. And for $10 per month, you get all that plus an invitation to an online Q&A chat with me once a quarter. Learn more at https://www.patreon.com/bettersexpodcast Better Sex with Jessa Zimmerman https://businessinnovatorsradio.com/better-sex/More info and resources: How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: How to make sex easy and fun for both of you: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast

The topic today is eroticism, which is our unique fingerprint of what turns us on. It’s a set of things or the theme of things that really arouses us – that we find highly interesting and erotic. We all have the things that we prefer in sex and things that we find more arousing than others. This is a useful concept and area of inquiry if we’re going to make our sex life as good as we can. Frees Us from Guilt and Shame I find eroticism fascinating. And one of the theories that I subscribe to was developed by Michael Bader, who wrote a great book called Arousal: The Secret Logic of Sexual Fantasies. He talks about how our eroticism, what we find especially arousing, frees us from guilt and shame. It moves those obstacles out of the way so that we can be fully aroused. I give a great example of what Mr. Bader means, and if you are interested in learning more, I highly recommend the book in terms of trying to figure out why exactly does your eroticism exist? What does it absolve you of or relieve for you? Why is Eroticism Important? In some ways, you may have been going along having sex with your partner for a long time. It hasn’t been highly erotic, and it’s been just fine, and that’s part of the problem. We tend, over time, to come down to what a colleague of mine called “lowest common denominator sex.” How do we get to this point and what do we do to move beyond this level? It’s important to understand that maybe there’s room to explore what could reenergize your sex life. We Need More Fuel for the Fire Not only is our sex life becoming a little bit more predictable if we’re with the same partner usually, but we tend to need more fuel on the fire to get aroused or to reach an orgasm as we age, as we have more stress, as we have more responsibilities. So, tapping into our eroticism is a great way to up the stimulation because that is mental stimulation. If you’ve ever heard the saying that our brain is our biggest sex organ, that’s what that means to me. I explain it further during the episode. Mental stimulation has a lot of power. And if we add that, we get our brain engaged and highly charged, and that’s a lot of energy for our sex life. That added stimulation makes it much, much easier to get aroused or reach orgasm, especially as we get older in terms of what we need to really get turned on. Your Eroticism is Revealed in Different Ways If you think about the best sex you’ve ever had or the sex that was the most exciting or what you like to do, that might point you in the direction of what you find highly arousing. A place you could also look is in your reaction to sexual or romantic material. There is so much out there, and we don’t respond equally to all of it. We’re going to be drawn towards things that shine a light on what we find erotic. Watch for those things. And if you haven’t noticed that or you’re not coming across it, maybe seek out some erotic material on purpose and test the waters. Another place you can look for your eroticism is in your sexual fantasies. If you fantasize, or if you could begin to fantasize about purely erotic material, your own creations really reflect your eroticism. This works because we don’t put stuff in there that doesn’t work for us. If you want to examine your sexual fantasies, spend a little bit of time there, maybe write some of these out. That can be a great place to identify the themes of what turns you on. Once You Understand Your Eroticism The next step is to share that with your partner. To learn theirs and to share yours with them. I can’t stress this enough – adopt a stance of curiosity without judgment. Set the stage to have a welcoming conversation and start to explore what really turns you each on without any sense that you must do anything about this yet, or that it means that anything is good or bad. Once you have the sort of common ground and this curiosity, you might share your own fantasies and just delving deeper into what really turns you on. Find the Overlap You come out of this process with a real knowledge of yourself and your partner, and I think you’re going to begin to see the overlap. There’s room to put these together. Now it doesn’t mean that what you find erotic, that what you fantasize about, that you want to do it. I describe different ways you can use erotic energy even if you don’t want to do the things in real life. You’re working with another person whose desires and wishes, and their eroticism also matters. And looking for where you can get overlap and you can play together, and you can harness what is wonderful. Figure Out What Eroticism is for You I can’t stress enough how powerful I think this is and how useful I think it can be in your sex life. And again, not every time you have sex. But it’s nice to have some of this to draw on and to have a little bit of variance in how arousing sex is… like there are places to pull it out and make it hotter. And then there are other times where we just sort of want a simple, moderately warm encounter. Right? They’re all okay, but this gives you some flexibility. I hope you enjoy that and thanks again for listening. More info:Book and New Course – https://sexwithoutstress.comWeb – https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/Sex Health Quiz – http://sexhealthquiz.com/If you’re enjoying the podcast and want to be a part of making sure it continues in the future, consider being a patron. With a small monthly pledge, you can support the costs of putting this show together. For as little as $2 per month, you can get advance access to each episode. For just a bit more, you will receive an advance copy of a chapter of my new book. And for $10 per month, you get all that plus an invitation to an online Q&A chat with me once a quarter. Learn more at https://www.patreon.com/bettersexpodcastBetter Sex with Jessa Zimmermanhttps://businessinnovatorsradio.com/better-sex/

The topic today is eroticism, which is our unique fingerprint of what turns us on. It’s a set of things or the theme of things that really arouses us – that we find highly interesting and erotic. We all have the things that we prefer in sex and things that we find more arousing than others. This is a useful concept and area of inquiry if we’re going to make our sex life as good as we can. Frees Us from Guilt and Shame I find eroticism fascinating. And one of the theories that I subscribe to was developed by Michael Bader, who wrote a great book called Arousal: The Secret Logic of Sexual Fantasies. He talks about how our eroticism, what we find especially arousing, frees us from guilt and shame. It moves those obstacles out of the way so that we can be fully aroused. I give a great example of what Mr. Bader means, and if you are interested in learning more, I highly recommend the book in terms of trying to figure out why exactly does your eroticism exist? What does it absolve you of or relieve for you? Why is Eroticism Important? In some ways, you may have been going along having sex with your partner for a long time. It hasn’t been highly erotic, and it’s been just fine, and that’s part of the problem. We tend, over time, to come down to what a colleague of mine called “lowest common denominator sex.” How do we get to this point and what do we do to move beyond this level? It’s important to understand that maybe there’s room to explore what could reenergize your sex life. We Need More Fuel for the Fire Not only is our sex life becoming a little bit more predictable if we’re with the same partner usually, but we tend to need more fuel on the fire to get aroused or to reach an orgasm as we age, as we have more stress, as we have more responsibilities. So, tapping into our eroticism is a great way to up the stimulation because that is mental stimulation. If you’ve ever heard the saying that our brain is our biggest sex organ, that’s what that means to me. I explain it further during the episode. Mental stimulation has a lot of power. And if we add that, we get our brain engaged and highly charged, and that’s a lot of energy for our sex life. That added stimulation makes it much, much easier to get aroused or reach orgasm, especially as we get older in terms of what we need to really get turned on. Your Eroticism is Revealed in Different Ways If you think about the best sex you’ve ever had or the sex that was the most exciting or what you like to do, that might point you in the direction of what you find highly arousing. A place you could also look is in your reaction to sexual or romantic material. There is so much out there, and we don’t respond equally to all of it. We’re going to be drawn towards things that shine a light on what we find erotic. Watch for those things. And if you haven’t noticed that or you’re not coming across it, maybe seek out some erotic material on purpose and test the waters. Another place you can look for your eroticism is in your sexual fantasies. If you fantasize, or if you could begin to fantasize about purely erotic material, your own creations really reflect your eroticism. This works because we don’t put stuff in there that doesn’t work for us. If you want to examine your sexual fantasies, spend a little bit of time there, maybe write some of these out. That can be a great place to identify the themes of what turns you on. Once You Understand Your Eroticism The next step is to share that with your partner. To learn theirs and to share yours with them. I can’t stress this enough – adopt a stance of curiosity without judgment. Set the stage to have a welcoming conversation and start to explore what really turns you each on without any sense that you must do anything about this yet, or that it means that anything is good or bad. Once you have the sort of common ground and this curiosity, you might share your own fantasies and just delving deeper into what really turns you on. Find the Overlap You come out of this process with a real knowledge of yourself and your partner, and I think you’re going to begin to see the overlap. There’s room to put these together. Now it doesn’t mean that what you find erotic, that what you fantasize about, that you want to do it. I describe different ways you can use erotic energy even if you don’t want to do the things in real life. You’re working with another person whose desires and wishes, and their eroticism also matters. And looking for where you can get overlap and you can play together, and you can harness what is wonderful. Figure Out What Eroticism is for You I can’t stress enough how powerful I think this is and how useful I think it can be in your sex life. And again, not every time you have sex. But it’s nice to have some of this to draw on and to have a little bit of variance in how arousing sex is… like there are places to pull it out and make it hotter. And then there are other times where we just sort of want a simple, moderately warm encounter. Right? They’re all okay, but this gives you some flexibility. I hope you enjoy that and thanks again for listening. More info:Book and New Course – https://sexwithoutstress.comWeb – https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/Sex Health Quiz – http://sexhealthquiz.com/If you’re enjoying the podcast and want to be a part of making sure it continues in the future, consider being a patron. With a small monthly pledge, you can support the costs of putting this show together. For as little as $2 per month, you can get advance access to each episode. For just a bit more, you will receive an advance copy of a chapter of my new book. And for $10 per month, you get all that plus an invitation to an online Q&A chat with me once a quarter. Learn more at https://www.patreon.com/bettersexpodcastBetter Sex with Jessa Zimmermanhttps://businessinnovatorsradio.com/better-sex/

Are artists victims of gentrification? Or the perpetrators of it? Artists move into empty post-industrial spaces and poor neighborhoods, save on rent, create their work, build up studios and communities — and then find they're priced out.   Lisa Adams was evicted twice from L.A.'s downtown Arts District and is worried it's about to happen again. Thirty years ago the area was home to light manufacturing and warehouses. Now it's one of the city's most expensive places to live. "Artists are willing to put up with things that other populations won't," says Lisa, “You are a kind of forerunner to what is to come." Artist Lisa Adams in her studio (Saul Gonzalez) In downtown L.A., The Wolff Company housing developer uses the cultural cachet of living an "artsy" lifestyle to rent two-bedroom loft apartments for $2,700 in a building called OLiVE DTLA. They advertise "commissioned street-art murals" as a building amenity and held a competition for a working artist to move in temporarily and give some street-cred to the property. "It's an authenticity and a personality that we have to kind of work to give the building," says the developer's marketing director. Demographic change in Downtown L.A. since the 1970s (Maps by Michael Bader)      

Are artists victims of gentrification? Or the perpetrators of it? Artists move into empty post-industrial spaces and poor neighborhoods, save on rent, create their work, build up studios and communities — and then find they're priced out.   Lisa Adams was evicted twice from L.A.'s downtown Arts District and is worried it's about to happen again. Thirty years ago the area was home to light manufacturing and warehouses. Now it's one of the city's most expensive places to live. "Artists are willing to put up with things that other populations won't," says Lisa, “You are a kind of forerunner to what is to come." Artist Lisa Adams in her studio (Saul Gonzalez) In downtown L.A., The Wolff Company housing developer uses the cultural cachet of living an "artsy" lifestyle to rent two-bedroom loft apartments for $2,700 in a building called OLiVE DTLA. They advertise "commissioned street-art murals" as a building amenity and held a competition for a working artist to move in temporarily and give some street-cred to the property. "It's an authenticity and a personality that we have to kind of work to give the building," says the developer's marketing director. Demographic change in Downtown L.A. since the 1970s (Maps by Michael Bader)      

The African-American community in Los Angeles has been steadily shrinking and is now down to 9 percent of the population. South L.A. is majority Latino now, but it is home to a few neighborhoods that are majority-black, some of them solidly middle-class. Those areas are a source of pride to the African-Americans who live in them, and residents are watching nervously as gentrification pushes white home-buyers into their communities. Demographic change in Inglewood since the 1970's (Maps by Michael Bader) In Inglewood, developers see an opportunity for new luxury housing close to big tech job centers near the beach. Once a whites-only enclave, Inglewood became a mostly African-American city when racial housing restrictions were lifted in the 1960s. Thousands of Latinos have moved in since. Now a light rail line and a $2 billion football stadium are under construction there, rents are going up, and people in Inglewood are waiting to see whether white people will come back. For Inglewood resident Erin Aubry Kaplan, the change would mean an increase in her home’s value but at the expense of a unique cultural space. “I got an email from my neighborhood listserve,” Kaplan says. "Someone just sent out a message: don't sell your house. Don't sell your house, stay put." LeRoy Clavon, a member of a radio controlled cars racers club that meets every weekend in the parking lot of Inglewood's Forum. (Saul Gonzalez)  

The African-American community in Los Angeles has been steadily shrinking and is now down to 9 percent of the population. South L.A. is majority Latino now, but it is home to a few neighborhoods that are majority-black, some of them solidly middle-class. Those areas are a source of pride to the African-Americans who live in them, and residents are watching nervously as gentrification pushes white home-buyers into their communities. Demographic change in Inglewood since the 1970's (Maps by Michael Bader) In Inglewood, developers see an opportunity for new luxury housing close to big tech job centers near the beach. Once a whites-only enclave, Inglewood became a mostly African-American city when racial housing restrictions were lifted in the 1960s. Thousands of Latinos have moved in since. Now a light rail line and a $2 billion football stadium are under construction there, rents are going up, and people in Inglewood are waiting to see whether white people will come back. For Inglewood resident Erin Aubry Kaplan, the change would mean an increase in her home’s value but at the expense of a unique cultural space. “I got an email from my neighborhood listserve,” Kaplan says. "Someone just sent out a message: don't sell your house. Don't sell your house, stay put." LeRoy Clavon, a member of a radio controlled cars racers club that meets every weekend in the parking lot of Inglewood's Forum. (Saul Gonzalez)  

Evictions are skyrocketing, and more and more tenants are learning to fight their landlords. At one aging apartment building near downtown Los Angeles, the new building owner went out on a financial limb to afford to buy it. The only way he can pay back his loan? Increase rents from as little as $500 a month to nearly $2,000. That means the current tenants have to go. But many of them are Central American immigrants who have lived there for decades, are related to each other, and are now gathering around Uver Santa Cruz — a tenant’s right activist determined to stay. For the amount of money his family can pay, Uver says, "There's no way we could find even a room, even a single room" to rent in Los Angeles. Each side represents financial ruin to the other. See you in court. Uver Santa Cruz and all the tenants in his building are fighting eviction. (Larry Hirshowitz) Demographic change in Rampart Village since the 1970's (Maps by Michael Bader)  

Evictions are skyrocketing, and more and more tenants are learning to fight their landlords. At one aging apartment building near downtown Los Angeles, the new building owner went out on a financial limb to afford to buy it. The only way he can pay back his loan? Increase rents from as little as $500 a month to nearly $2,000. That means the current tenants have to go. But many of them are Central American immigrants who have lived there for decades, are related to each other, and are now gathering around Uver Santa Cruz — a tenant’s right activist determined to stay. For the amount of money his family can pay, Uver says, "There's no way we could find even a room, even a single room" to rent in Los Angeles. Each side represents financial ruin to the other. See you in court. Uver Santa Cruz and all the tenants in his building are fighting eviction. (Larry Hirshowitz) Demographic change in Rampart Village since the 1970's (Maps by Michael Bader)  

Southern California was built on the sale of sunlit homes in affordable real estate developments. But the many building booms of the past century haven't been enough. In just the past 15 years, Los Angeles has added 230,000 new residents but only 40,000 new homes. The median cost of a home in L.A. has doubled in the last five years. Rent climbs ever upward. Demographic change in Hollywood since the 1970's (Maps by Michael Bader) That's led to a building boom that is utterly transforming Los Angeles. Suburban sprawl now covers all the land within reasonable commuting distance of the job centers, so L.A. is growing up instead of out. Cranes tower over skyscrapers in neighborhoods of single-story family homes. Small stucco houses in middle-class neighborhoods are priced over $1 million and once-neglected neighborhoods are quickly gentrifying.Meet Cesar Vega, whose bungalow in Hollywood is surrounded on three sides by enormous new apartment buildings. As Los Angeles becomes denser and more urban, Cesar feels like a stranger in his hometown. “I don’t see myself in a lot of the things that are happening,” he says. Most of the new apartments will rent for market rate — these days, that’s $2,500 for a two-bedroom apartment. If there’s a housing shortage in L.A. and lots of new housing is being built, shouldn’t prices be dropping? Why aren't they? Cesar Vega lives in this small Hollywood home as cranes rise around him. (Saul Gonzalez)  

Southern California was built on the sale of sunlit homes in affordable real estate developments. But the many building booms of the past century haven't been enough. In just the past 15 years, Los Angeles has added 230,000 new residents but only 40,000 new homes. The median cost of a home in L.A. has doubled in the last five years. Rent climbs ever upward. Demographic change in Hollywood since the 1970's (Maps by Michael Bader) That's led to a building boom that is utterly transforming Los Angeles. Suburban sprawl now covers all the land within reasonable commuting distance of the job centers, so L.A. is growing up instead of out. Cranes tower over skyscrapers in neighborhoods of single-story family homes. Small stucco houses in middle-class neighborhoods are priced over $1 million and once-neglected neighborhoods are quickly gentrifying.Meet Cesar Vega, whose bungalow in Hollywood is surrounded on three sides by enormous new apartment buildings. As Los Angeles becomes denser and more urban, Cesar feels like a stranger in his hometown. “I don’t see myself in a lot of the things that are happening,” he says. Most of the new apartments will rent for market rate — these days, that’s $2,500 for a two-bedroom apartment. If there’s a housing shortage in L.A. and lots of new housing is being built, shouldn’t prices be dropping? Why aren't they? Cesar Vega lives in this small Hollywood home as cranes rise around him. (Saul Gonzalez)  

Are you concerned about making the right choices in Retirement? Would it help if you could find a Senior Transition Specialist who would talk you through every decision from where to live, to the best doctors in your area? Heather Williams, owner of About Senior Living, Dan Segal from Optimal Senior Care Solutions and Michael Bader from My Senior Care Advisors are on the show to answer all of your questions and help you feel at ease.

An interview with Michael Bader, Ph.D about sexual fantasies. Michael suggests that our sexual fantasies work by offering a solution to any guilt and fear that may undermine our relationship to sexuality. He proposes that many—especially men—may use fantasy to cope with concern about hurting their partner, because of caring so much about the partner’s ...read more » The post Sexual Fantasy with Michael Bader appeared first on Safe Space Radio.

Dr. Michael Bader answered your questions about sexual fantasies in AROUSAL: THE SECRET LOGIC OF SEXUAL FANTASIES. Now, he'll demystify men and sex as we discuss his new book, MALE SEXUALITY: WHY WOMEN DON'T UNDERSTAND IT -- AND MEN DON'T EITHER. Join us and get your questions answered!

Dr. Michael Bader answered your questions about sexual fantasies in AROUSAL: THE SECRET LOGIC OF SEXUAL FANTASIES. Now, he'll demystify men and sex as we discuss his new book, MALE SEXUALITY: WHY WOMEN DON'T UNDERSTAND IT -- AND MEN DON'T EITHER. Join us and get your questions answered!